1. When you’ve not eaten breakfast and they’ve not opened by 9am
Is this how I die early in the morning?
2. When they serve you plenty rice and put a drop of stew
That’s an abomination in my village!
3. You, when they say plastic pack is N100
Let’s be lying this lie small small o!
4. When you now say you want to do eat-in and you see all the customers eating
Nawa! Na real wa!
5. You, when you want to buy plantain and they say it has finished
You say wetin?
6. And they say it with straight face!
No, but are they not cruel?
7. As if they are not aware that not having dodo is classified as crimes against humanity
Okay, it’s not a crime yet, but someone should add it ASAP!
8. When you give them N500 and they say they don’t have common N50 change
I’m not really understanding all this!
9. Your face, when they say you should leave the change
In this recession? You must be a joker.
10. When you realize that meat in amala section is more expensive than the meat in rice section, you’re like
Things are not adding up in this place o!
11. When you thought you bought jollof, but all you see is hair in your food
Is this life?