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In this interview with Mariam “Mory Coco” Bakre, the popular creative and influencer, she explores her passion for cooking and her best recipes, detailing the best methods that guarantee great results. She also touches on her role as a Knorr Eativist and how that influences her dietary decisions. Join us as we peek into her mind as a Knorr Eativist.
Can you share a creative and healthy recipe that your family loves, and how did you come up with it?
Mory Coco: I wouldn’t call it a sweet treat, but I definitely love a good bowl of spicy tomato-based spaghetti! This dish was born from my desire to find a satisfying and healthy way to indulge my cravings. It hits all the right notes—fresh tomatoes cooked into a rich sauce with just the right amount of heat and perfectly cooked spaghetti, waiting to be topped with my favourite mix of veggies—bell peppers, carrots, and sometimes even spinach adds essential nutrients and a satisfying crunch. This meal is a perfect example of how healthy eating doesn’t have to be bland!
Can you share a creative and healthy recipe your family loves?
Mory Coco: A staple in our household is turkey pepper soup with boiled plantains. It’s incredibly easy to make, undeniably healthy, and bursting with flavour that everyone enjoys. You begin by sautéing aromatic ingredients like garlic, onion, and ginger. Chopped turkey is added and allowed to release its natural juices, further deepening the flavor profile. Next, add fresh habanero peppers and herbs and spices like rosemary and thyme. Add enough water to create a satisfying broth, followed by pepper soup spice mix, a Knorr seasoning cube, and a sprinkle of salt for balance. It’s ready to be enjoyed after simmering until the turkey reaches your desired tenderness! Then serve with a side of boiled plantains.
As a Knorr Eativist, what’s your favourite healthy ingredient swap in traditional recipes to make it fun and enticing?
Mory Coco: As a Knorr Eativist, I’m passionate about finding healthy swaps that don’t compromise taste! There’s a terrible misconception that healthy meals can’t taste good, and that’s definitely not true. For instance, when making jollof rice, I ditch the regular vegetable oil and swap it for olive oil. I sometimes go even further by using herb-infused olive oil with notes of rosemary, thyme, garlic, and chillies. This simple switch adds complexity and a delightful nutritional boost, making every bite delicious and good for you! It’s a perfect example of how small changes can impact healthy and flavorful cooking.
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Discovering your babe has a work-spoon buddy can be distressing. Why should their coworker have a dedicated second spoon to create a lunchtime duo with your lover?
Here’s how to handle the situation before things get out of hand.
Encourage your lover to fast at work
No serious person will disregard a spiritual practice that would only make them succeed in 2024 just for food from a co-worker trying to get their attention. If they do, let them go.
Make the spoon go missing
Whether you have access to the second spoon or not, your problem is half-solved when it gets lost. But I hope your bae’s co-worker isn’t so invested that they get another spoon for your babe anyway.
Remind them that people get jazzed through food
Telling your babe to take their eyes off other people’s food isn’t a hard task. Simply remind them about their village people and they’ll be disciplined. If they’re wise, they’ll quickly shift focus from their colleague to only you and your loving meals.
Get them a lunchbox
Since food is your partner’s release clause, maybe you need to lock them down with a packed lunchbox or Tupperware. Put beans in one box, stir fry pasta in another and orishirishi in another. But you’d have to wake up at 4:50 a.m every morning to achieve this, so good luck to you.
No competi, competition for my baby Or just get them a finer spoon
Why stress when you can simply get your spouse a finer second spoon. Anytime they bring out the spoon you gave them, it’ll remind the work partner to look somewhere else. So make sure it’s bright gold.
Pray for your bae
If somehow, all of the above fail, and they’re still flexing the second spoon to eat with their co-worker, the matter is now in God’s hands.
The co-worker: WDYM Sack Letter Day? Throw your bae away
A person who can’t leave their work spouse’s food alone despite your best efforts is beyond saving. Push them out and avoid the apparent love triangle. You’ve lost the fight.
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It was a sunny Saturday on November 11, 2023. The premises of La Madison Place, Lagos, was buzzing with meat and party lovers who came together to experience the first ever Burning Ram by Zikoko.
In case you missed it, or you knew about it and thought it was all hype — people hyped it because they trust Zikoko to deliver — everyone had fun. We didn’t want to go home. Just ask DJ Kiss, who played for us.
These are the things you missed and how to fix up in 2024.
Games
People got into ludo, chess, jenga, table football, mini basketball and more.
Meat
The vendor stands had people enjoy suya and barbeque of all kinds, asun meat pie (and burger), nkwobi, small chops and a whole range of cocktails. The atmosphere was all delicious meat aroma and smoke.
Movie time
While people took pictures and made videos, patronised vendors and ate good food, others sat in a chilled tent and watched Avatar: The Way of Water, courtesy of FilmHouse Cinema and FilmOne Nigeria.
Networking
We made friends, exchanged compliments, contacts and IG handles, and could finally put faces to some of our online friends and internet neighbours. We met popular jingos like Joey Akan, Fu’ad Lawal, Emeneks, Dammy B, Hauwa L, Dwin the Stoic, Renike, Chigozie and many more.
Ramsey the Ram
It was a golden moment when Adeyinka paraded Ramsey, Burning Ram’s prized ram, as Blossom and Dammy (AKA the Dorime Sisters) followed, raising Jack Daniel’s bottles in the air.
The raffle draw
It wasn’t a play-play thing when we announced that one lucky guest will win a live ram. The big grill drum of raffle tickets was spun, and Chioma Katherine won our Ramsey. Imagine the joy of coming to Burning Ram and returning home with a ram. It’s equivalent to J Hus’ “came in a black Benz, left in a white one” lyrics.
Fire breathers
You might’ve seen fire dancers many times or even been one yourself, but have you seen fire dancers perform while tossing and spinning actual fire? These guys at Burning Ram danced all the legwork known and unknown while spitting flames out of their mouths. It was like Daenerys was in one corner whispering, “dracarys”.
Eating competition
When it was time to see who really brought an appetite to Burning Ram, fine guys and babes nominated themselves. With bowls of jollof rice and plenty meat before them, and a large, vocal audience around, they sat and devoured their plates. Others ate hot chicken wings while singing the Nigerian national anthem. Winners emerged and received stuffed bags of Burning Ram souvenirs.
A rave
DJ Kiss’ set buzzed loudly and N.A.T.E (Nathan Good luck) hyped us into party mode with a mix of afrobeats hits, classics like Konko Below and American pop that took us back to our younger years. We moved our bodies, jumped, screamed out lyrics and had maximum fun.
How to not miss a Zikoko event
Be our friend
Zikoko is alive on all social media platforms. Follow us and click the notification buttons to get all the updates. Subscribe to our newsletter, join our WhatsApp community, just be our best friends, and you’ll be first to know about our events as they roll out.
Get your tickets ASAP
Secure your ticket before people rush it. You know how the saying goes; you snooze, you lose.
Image Source: Prince Mazani Leave home on time
You’ve followed us, gotten the gist about our next event and your tickets as soon as they drop, don’t wait till it’s ten minutes to party time before you leave the house on the day of the event. Well, except you like attending parties when they’re over or you’ve missed the major activities.
Burning Ram is over, but this meaty playlist can still keep you going this week:
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Snake, goat, chicken, it wont matter once you’re at THE meat festival of the year, so get your tickets now.
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Can any self-respecting food lover really give themselves the “foodie” title if they haven’t done some form of culinary excursion? I mean, it’s not only about being able to differentiate between pounded and poundo yam.
That’s where we come in. By the time you experience these food festivals, you’ll be more than deserving of your “food lover” ID card.
Bole Festival
Whether you spell it as “bole” or “boli”, this should be the first stop on your food tour. You’d be surprised by the different bole recipes available. Warning: You may never eat it with groundnuts again.
Image: Bole Festival on X
Burning Ram
If you think about it, meat may be every food lover’s origin story. Almost all of us passed through a stealing-meat-from-the-pot phase — don’t even deny it. Burning Ram celebrates the Nigerian culture of meat and grill, and the best part? As of the date of publishing, you can still be a part of the 2023 edition.
New Yam Festival
Yam is the Nigerian staple, not jollof rice. How else do you explain how almost every state and tribe in the country has their own version of a New Yam Festival? For the Igbos, it’s typically celebrated after the rainy season in August, and referred to as “Iwa ji” or “Iri ji”. For the Yorubas, especially in Ekiti, it is termed “Odun Ijesu”. Irrespective of what tribe you celebrate with, you’re sure to find yam delicacies of all types, music, dance and masquerade displays at a New Yam Festival.
Image: The Guardian Nigeria
West Africa Food Festival
This festival is proof you don’t have to japa to expand your tastebuds. As the name implies, this festival involves celebrating the dishes and culinary culture of West African countries. The annual festival is typically held in the countries along West Africa, and 2022’s edition was in Lagos. It features food, competitions and wine tastings.
Image: Flickr
Lagos Seafood Festival
You might think you like seafood, but have you really had everything the sea has to offer if you haven’t eaten stuff like octopus or human-sized fish? The annual festival was rebranded to “Lagos Food Festival” in 2022, but you’re still sure to find interesting sea creatures when you attend.
Argungu Festival
The cultural festival has increasingly become associated with food, as it involves a fishing competition to catch the biggest fish. It happens in Kebbi over a four-day period every year and features agricultural showcases, musical performances as well as wrestling and swimming competitions.
The winner of the 2020 fishing competition was awarded ₦10m, two cars and two seats to Hajj. Excuse me while I go learn how to fish.
Image: The Nation
Calabar Carnival
Termed “Africa’s biggest street party”, the carnival celebrates the Cross River culture, but the cuisine is a huge part of it. It’s an annual four-day event that features a food festival of its own, with rich Efik cuisine, grills and drinks.
Image: The Whistler
Jos Food Festival
If you’ve ever entertained curiosity about what food on the Plateau tastes like, you might want to add the Jos Food Festival to your itinerary. It features indigenous food displays and local musical performances.
Image: Sunday Alamba
PS: You can’t have read up to this point without signing up for Burning Ram. Do it now.
NEXT READ: Like Boli, These Nigerian Meals Deserve Their Own Festivals
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For a meal that’s a simple mixture of butter, flour, yeast and sugar, bread is the GOATed delicacy — yes, delicacy — man has ever made.
Nothing comes close to bread. You can make it on a stove or in an oven, it comes in different shapes and sizes, and you can pair it with literally anything and it’ll slap harder than a giveaway in this agbado era.
Egusi
Image sourced from foodrythms People might look at you sideways as you carefully spread your egusi on a thick slice of bread, but that shouldn’t concern you. They’ll never understand the greatness of such a pairing.
Beans of any kind
Image sourced from guardian.ng Do you know how bad you have to be to go into a family and marry all the members? The only person that comes close was Esau’s brother, Jacob, and we all know how much God loved him. Give it akara, ewa aganyin, palm oil beans, vegetable oil beans, and if you’re a real risk taker, gbegiri.
Stew
Image sourced from mydiasporakitchen If you can eat swallow and soup, then you can eat bread and stew. Make sure there’s an excess amount of protein in your stew, fold that bread, and eat to your heart’s content.
Banana
Image sourced from medicalnewstoday If you can eat banana bread, then you can slice a banana, place it between two slices of bread, and eat.
Pepsi
Image sourced from nextcashandcarry Notice how we singled Pepsi out from its counterparts? Bread and all the other sodas are great, but bread and Pepsi? Your inner bricklayer will awaken, and you’ll feel like you can move mountains.
Avocado
Image sourced from jessicagavin Even though avocados look the way they do, we believe in the power of bread to make anything taste better than rice on a Sunday.
Amala
Image sourced from africanfoodnetwork We need you to have an open mind. People have attested to the greatness of this pairing. Plus, amala looks like chocolate.
Indomie
Image sourced from breakthespice If you plan on pairing cooked Indomie with bread then you have stand in front of the stove, take the indomie straight from the pot to the bread and into your mouth. It’ll slap so hard you’ll give testimonies for weeks to come.
Ice cream
Image sourced from swasthi’srecipes Think of it like bread and tea. Tear large chunks of bread into your bowl of ice cream, wait for it to steep, and then, scoop into your mouth.
Egg
Image sourced from bakerpedia One thing about bread, it’ll find other versatile foods and pair up with them. Bread and egg bangs, especially on a Saturday morning with a hot cup of tea to wash it down. And guess what. It can sleep with the mother too *wink.
AnointingOlive oilWe told you bread was for everyone — even the godly among us. Drizzle a light amount on your bread, let it soak in for a bit and eat. It’ll taste like a symphony in your mouth.
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Food pairing events are known for three things: Free food, great drinks and good vibes. So, when the Singleton Tribe stormed Abuja over the weekend, we knew we’d learn a few tips and tricks on how to properly faaji with friends.
Good food
In this age of FaceTime and video calls, rest assured people are not getting dressed and leaving home just to look at your face. The food must be surplus, and every bite must slap.
Baffs
Speaking of, drip is a lifelong commitment for some of us. Yes, the invite says casual but in a time when fuel is gold, if I’m showing up, I’m showing OUT, thank you very much.
A bonding activity
Think of creative ways to set the tone for a chill and casual occasion. It could be conversational card games or a planting session, if you’re bougie like that. Your guests will probably be more than happy to become plant mums and dads together.
More food because who no like better thing?
If you’re feeling a little playful, you can blindfold your guests for that element of mystery. Mysterious boys and girlies, take note.
The booze that brings everyone together
What’s a good turn-up without The Singleton? Abuja was a vibe on Sunday, July 23rd when the capital city’s hottest creatives got to unwind and bond over good food, music and games with The Singleton.
Want to be a part of the next Singleton Tribe experience? Follow @thesingletonngr on Instagram and look out for the latest updates.
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The ones who just came to eat
They heard “Jollof” and just knew they had to be there. If food runs out at the festival, they’re most likely behind it.
The ones that came to look for love
It’s true when they say the way to some people’s hearts is through their stomach. They came for the food, but they also came to find someone who likes food just as much as they do.
Jollof historians
You’re just there to eat and have a good time, but these people want to explain the story of how Jollof was first created in Senegal in the 14th century. Their stories are nice but these people will distract you. Focus on the food.
Content creators
Even though no one should ever miss a Jollof festival for anything, it happens sometimes. That’s where the content creators come in. They’ll film everything for those who missed out.
Owambe gatecrashers
These guys will mistake the festival for an owambe and show up. But at least they’ll bring the owambe energy with them.
The cooks
These ones will swear they can cook Jollof rice that’ll make you emotional. They might not be wrong sha, especially if they use great seasoning like Knorr.
The Knorr itself
What’s a good plate of Jollof without the best seasoning? Knorr knows this, so they’re hosting the Knorr Jollof Fest to celebrate food culture. Knorr is encouraging people to Eat for Good by incorporating more healthy options like veggies into their foods, so come ready to eat. There’ll be lots of food from different chefs, lots of games, and a lot of fun to be had. If you know you like food, you definitely want to be there.
It’s happening on July 23, 2023, at Muri Okunola Park, Lagos. To register for the event, just visit the Jollof Fest website, and make sure you show up.
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Talk True is a Zikoko limited series for medical myth-busting. With each episode, we’ll talk to medical professionals about commonly misunderstood health issues to get the actual facts.
If you grew up in a Nigerian home, you know it’s a given that Saturdays are reserved for beans or beans-derived meals. And if you didn’t like beans, you were likely encouraged to eat it or prepare to be short. Beans have been so associated with height that almost every tall person can relate to being presented with the “Do you like beans?” question at least once in their lifetime.
But how did our parents and grannies start championing the “beans for height” theory in the first place? Is it a claim based on facts, or yet another ploy to force us to eat the food at home? Ayooluwa Okunjolu, a nutritionist, provides answers.
Why’s the “beans for height” theory even a thing?
“Beans are a great source of plant-based protein, and protein is an essential nutrient for growth and development — which we assumed means “height” — but few people actually know that beans isn’t all protein. It’s a great protein source, but that’s not all it is,” Ayooluwa says.
While beans contain 21-25% protein by weight — much higher than other plant-based protein sources — it contains about 65-72% complex carbohydrates by weight as well. Meaning it’s technically more carbs than protein. So, using beans alone as the primary source of protein in your diet won’t exactly provide all the growth and development your body needs.
Nigerian mothers right now
So, does eating beans actually make you tall?
“If it were true, I’d definitely be six feet tall, because my mum made sure I ate a lot of beans growing up,” Ayooluwa notes.
It just doesn’t work that way
He explains further.
“Growth and development are more of a cellular thing: organ development, tissue building and repair, cognitive development, etc.
Protein-rich food like beans supports growth and development, but it’s just one piece of the puzzle when it comes to increase in height. Genetic factors account for approximately 60-80% of a person’s height, while environmental factors — like diet, exercise and lifestyle — contribute only 20-40%.
Your diet can impact whether you reach your maximum height potential, but it can’t alter the genetic potential for height. So, I’m sorry, but if your parents aren’t tall, it’s unlikely you’ll be tall regardless of the amount of beans you eat.”
Eating beans doesn’t equal to height, dear
Should you stop eating beans, then?
Definitely not. Beans contribute to healthy iron and Vitamin B intake, which prevents anaemia that could result in delayed growth in children. Some sources also say it’s great for brain power. As Ayooluwa explains, improper nutrition will also lead to an individual not reaching their full height potential.
“Beans are a very important part of our diet. It’s really nutritious, and when taken together with other healthy foods in a balanced diet, the body grows as it should.”
What kind of food can make you tall?
A balanced approach to nutrients is key. If your genetic blueprint doesn’t have “six feet” levels of height, there’s almost nothing food can do. But nutrition can help, and Ayooluwa explains that it’s an all-hands-on-deck approach.
“There’s no special food that’ll make you taller, but balancing all the nutrients is essential for growth and development. Nutrients like carbs, healthy fats, protein, vitamins and minerals are all equally important.”
Is there still hope for short people?
Not exactly. There’s hardly any physical change (read as height) that can happen once you’ve crossed puberty. This is because your bones stop growing and essentially fuse together.
“We stop growing around age 20, so eating healthy shouldn’t be for the purpose of getting taller at that age. Growth starts from infancy. Once there’s malnourishment and stunted development from an early age, it’s difficult to change in adulthood. So, doing the right thing from the beginning is essential. It doesn’t mean adults shouldn’t eat healthily, though. Remember, there’s still cellular growth and development going on — tissue repair and muscle building, for instance.”
The takeaway
Beans are a great source of protein, but it’s not the only factor involved in height. Ensuring a well-balanced diet from childhood will help you reach your full growth potential. But height is largely genetics. So, if it didn’t dey, it didn’t dey.
NEXT READ: Talk True: Does Cranberry Juice Cure UTIs?
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Nigerians are not smiling at the moment, and it’s for good reason. Fuel scarcity, sudden subsidy removal, exchange rate palava and inflated foodstuff prices — we’re going through a lot.
But again, things aren’t that bad. You can still go to the foodstuff market with ₦1k. We can’t promise you’ll get the things you need, but you surely won’t return home empty-handed.
Locust beans
Source: FarmhouzNG
Did you know this is a great alternative to seasoning powder? Ask your granny. She’ll share the secret.
Limestone
Source: Afrilege
Don’t you need to soften your ewedu leaves? It’s cheap, and remember the point is to not go home empty-handed.
Kpomo
Source: 9jafoodie
Forget turkey and beef, word on the street is kpomo is king. Your pot of soup might smell funky, but it’ll be loaded with “proteinous” pieces.
Salt
Source: allrecipes
Salt is life, so it makes perfect sense that it’s cheap.
Potato
Source: Mile12mart
Sweet potato is ridiculously cheap.
Curry and thyme
Source: Jumia Nigeria
Bring the neighbours to the yard with your cooking. The food might be bleh, but the aroma will do what you need it to do.
Vegetable
Source: Guardian
Ewedu, ugwu, waterleaf. Maybe this is the motivation you need to start your home garden.
Garri
Source: HTC Plus
Garri stays the most loyal grain in Nigeria — a paint bucket is still about ₦1k. We should give this king his flowers.
Spatula (AKA omorogun)
Source: Mychopchop
At this point, ₦1k is showing off because how dare you afford a kitchen utensil.
Polybag
Source: Nairaland
Because how else will you carry your groceries home?
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It cannot be a coincidence that Jagaban assumed office as our president around the same time corn is in season. We know how much President Tinubu loves corn, so as good citizens, it’s only right that we indulge our leader’s cravings.
You don’t have to love roasted or boiled corn; learn these new recipes and you might bag a gig as Aso Rock’s head chef.
Stir fry corn
Source: Jone & Jules
Fried rice and pasta were found dead in a ditch. This is also significantly pocket friendly.
Baby corn pepper soup
Source: Vaya
If you can’t afford to buy turkey right now, we have the perfect alternative: baby corn. All you have to do is close your eyes and imagine that you’re eating turkey.
Corn salad
Source: Delight
Have you seen the price of cabbage and salad cream lately? Exactly. You won’t need to spend that much while making corn salad.
Corn juice
Source: Shanghai Daily
Haters will call it ogi or kunu but don’t mind them. Just make sure you serve it chilled and with lots of sugar.
Candied corn
Source: The Food Network
You can either go for sweet or savoury. This can replace small chops at your next owambe.
Barbecued baby corn
Source: Food Network
A serving of grilled turkey/chicken wings is about N1700 at the moment. If you can afford it in this economy, we’re adding you to our eat the rich list. You’ll be saving a whopping N1200 if you opt for grilled baby corn. Haters will call it roasted corn.
Creamed corn
Source: Bellyfull
We don’t know what this tastes like but surely a better option than roasted agbado. Just make sure you add chilli oil.
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We just want our new president to reduce the costs of these food items within his first 100 days in office before we die of starvation. We’re not asking for too much from our new president.
Egg
Source: Roselyn’s food house
Remember when you could get an egg for ₦20 or ₦30? This ₦100 madness has to stop.
Turkey
Source: The Kitchen Muse
It’s so wrong that turkey is now a protein option reserved for festive seasons in many households. Jagaban, please, run it for us. Let’s go back to the days of having a kilo of turkey for ₦1700.
Beverages
Forget fit fam, the ₦200 price tag on Coke, Fanta, Pepsi and the rest is probably why people now drink water more.
Noodles
Have you seen any pack of noodles going for ₦50? Exactly. The status quo needs to return ASAP.
Garri
A paint bucket of garri has no business being anywhere above ₦1k. We don’t have an exact figure in mind but definitely below a thousand.
Bread
Source: Taste Better From Scratch
How did we get to the point where the price of sliced and agege bread are rubbing shoulders? Is this the upside down?
Pure water
Pure water needs to return to the days of ₦5 per sachet, and ₦100 per bag.
Margarine
Source: Twitter (@stylesbymorh)
Everyone involved in making us pay over ₦1k for margarine must answer for their crimes.
Sardine
Source: Dimsale Global
₦600 for a tin of sardines is criminal, and we’ve had enough. It might come in a golden tin, but IT. IS. NOT. GOLD. ₦200 or nothing, Mr President.
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Miss Shawarma was that one meal we couldn’t get enough of because she was just perfect.
Can’t say the same nowadays. It’s hard to put shawarma and class in the same sentence. So how did shawarma lose all her rizz?
Source: Kikifoodies
Dated food bloggers
Shawarma’s real trouble started when she was discovered by food bloggers. All the mysterious things that made her so yummy became public knowledge—no thanks to the countless videos of “How to make your own shawarma” on the interwebs.
Too much (Pitta) bread
Source: Forks and Foliage
Like hair to Samson, so is pitta bread to shawarma. The fact that you could walk into random supermarkets and buy pitta bread gave many people the idea that anyone can make shawarma.
Everywhere you go like MTN
Maybe we should blame it on the fact that Davido’s Unavailable came rather late. Every bus stop in Lagos has a shawarma stand. Take a leaf from Davido’s book babes.
Became a cheap babe
It was a little harder to buy shawarma on a whim when the least we could pay was N2500 for a serving. Can’t say the same anymore with N500 shawarma everywhere. She needs to learn from seafood okra.
Hopped on the Owambe train
Not our classy shawarma fighting for recognition with abula, ofada rice, and ewa aganyin at owambe functions. You can’t compete with the OGs like that. Leave that to small chops.
Became a people pleaser
Shawarma’s dignity was intact when she was just for beef and chicken lovers. These days? There’s seafood, noodle, jollof, suya, mushroom and all sorts. Why dear? Everyone can’t like you and that’s okay.
There’ll be loads to eat and drink at the hottest women-only party in Lagos on May 27th. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
Don’t leave without getting your ticket to HERtitude 2023! -
Contrary to opinions on the streets of Twitter, you don’t just wake up one day and decide to cook up a storm for four straight days unprovoked — at least, that wasn’t Hilda Baci’s M.O for shattering a Guinness World Record.
“It took me five years to be ready for this attempt,” the 27-year-old chef shared during a chat with Zikoko a week before the cook-a-thon.
Source: BellaNaija
Baci first nurtured the idea when she was 21. However, the lack of resources or a big enough platform at the time kept the dream at bay — until she was ready to pick it up again late in 2022.
Months ahead of the impressive cook-a-thon, Hilda Baci was in every room and literally everyone’s face with a single message: “I’m breaking a world record, and you must bear witness.”
A strong desire to be taken seriously by peers and big brands in the food industry is what drove her.
And oh boy, did the world pay attention to this audacious woman? In Baci, many could see a reflection of themselves, inspired even, to attempt their own individual records.
An expensive venture no doubt, Baci had to collaborate with top brands in the culinary industry: Gino Max, Bama Mayonnaise, Woodscope, VivaPlus Detergent, Chillcity, Uber, Oriki, Beige Wallet, among others.
READ THIS: 100 Hours Completed: Hilda Baci on the Journey to Breaking a Culinary World Record
A month ahead of the cook-a-thon, Baci challenged herself to a 24-hour dry run, and the success of it would erase any doubts she had about breaking a world record.
Let the cook-a-thon begin
Source: Instagram (@hildabacicookathon)
At 10 a.m. on Thursday, May 11, 2023, the doors of Baci’s make-shift kitchen at Amore Gardens, Lekki, were thrown open for the world to witness greatness in its entirety.
Supporters and well-wishers poured through the gates with a clear mission: Hype Hilda Baci till the finish line. This mission reverberated through the country until the cook-a-thon became the most talked about topic in the Nigerian social media space.
From those inspired by Baci’s strength and audacity to others who called their own culinary skills to question, it was all beautiful to see.
And we have the receipts:
Ghanaians even tried to claim Hilda Baci as one of their own.
The previous holder of the record, Lata Tondon, sent her best wishes to Hilda.
Guinness World Record holder for longest dance party, Kaffy, also showed up for her.
Enioluwa was there through it all, and everyone now wants a friend like him in their corner.
What screams support more than a colleague willing to hit the streets with a placard?
Amid the excitement, there were growing concerns about the possibility that Guinness World Records would snub Baci’s attempt, but this was nipped in the bud after she was acknowledged in a Twitter post.
At 7:46 a.m. on Monday, May 15 (officially, day four of the cook-a-thon), Baci shattered Chef Tondon’s existing record of 87 hours, 45 minutes and 00 seconds.
However, the journey was far from over as she had a mission to set a new record of cooking for 96 hours — a feat which was accomplished at precisely 4 p.m. on the same Monday.
But Baci would not only shock herself, but also the world, when she went an additional four hours to finally turn off the gas at 100 hours.
Meet Hilda Baci’s team
While it’s important to celebrate Hilda Baci’s impressive feat, there were superstars behind her who made this feat possible. Nigerians especially fell in love with, Ajom Sunday Okwe (AKA Chef Sunny), the sous chef who occasionally dabbed Baci’s face when it got extra sweaty.
We spoke to her PR coordinator, Nene Bejide, and here’s what she had to say.
There’s been a lot of hype for the chef who stayed in the kitchen with Hilda. Which other team members should we be celebrating?
I’ll say Nowe, for putting the team together. Chef Gibs, who came onboard through Hilda — he’s the president of the Culinary Arts Practitioners Association of Nigeria (CAPA). Chef Gibs was very instrumental to how the food flowed. He worked with Hilda to put the menu together and break it into rounds. He also helped her during the dry run to calculate the time she spent on each meal.
Hilda is a fast cook. So it was important for him to let her know how long to spend on each meal to avoid complete burnout.
Has any of the team members been inspired to set their own world record?
There’ve been conversations like that — although some of them might’ve been jokes. But yeah, I’m sure the cook-a-thon has gotten them thinking about what to do.
Before she stepped into the kitchen, Baci shared what she hoped to achieve with her record-breaking attempt.
You could shatter a record that seems almost impossible when you set out. What would you do with the platform and visibility?
I want to make a conscious effort to propagate Nigerian recipes across the globe. Nigerian food is so good and works with many palates. We have so many options. I want people from other countries to try our meals just like we try creamy pasta, spaghetti bolognese and the likes. At least one Nigerian meal should be part of every household’s staple.
Do you have words for young chefs who have been inspired by your cook-a-thon?
Your dreams are valid. Focus on the journey and pay no mind to what other people are doing. Be consistent; it guarantees your growth in life. You must also learn to put God first in everything you do.
What makes you feel fulfilled at this particular moment?
My journey so far, and where I’m coming from. When I think about that, it makes me happy.
Zikoko caught up with Baci three days after she broke the world record, and her joy was contagious. Here’s what she had to share:
Were you tempted to quit after breaking the existing record?
Honestly, when I broke the record I didn’t feel like my job was done. It just felt like another hour, and I knew I’d not gotten to my goal. I’d already conditioned my mind to hit a certain goal.
But after the 96th hour — your original goal — why did you push for the extra four hours? That was a surprise no one saw coming.
There was no special reason really. My friends had come to me and suggested doing 100 hours since it would make it a round figure. My brother was in on it too, so I thought about it and with the way I was feeling at the time, it was doable. I ran it through my culinary director, and he said we still had raw materials to cook for more people, so I went for it.
How did it feel to finally turn in the last meal and switch off the gas?
Relief. Just relief.
I was so happy and grateful to God. I couldn’t believe I’d gotten to that point. Just remembering how difficult it was when I started, and then, I’d gotten to that point? It felt incredible.
GWR already acknowledged your attempt. What’s the end game if you don’t get the title?
If this is about a win, I’ve already gotten a win. But I’m almost certain we’ll be recognised, and this isn’t from a place of arrogance. We did our due diligence, we followed the rules and guidelines to the T. Jason, a current record holder, was very helpful in making sure my CCTV was up and running. We also took witness statements.
I’m almost certain we’ll get it, but even if we don’t, I won’t break a sweat.
Do you plan on returning to the kitchen soon?
Of course. Sooner than you think.
I haven’t done any cooking since the cook-a-thon, but best believe I’ll get back to it soon. I own a restaurant; I have work to do.
Join Hilda Baci to party at the hottest women-only party in Lagos on May 27. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
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This might sound like a joke, but SAPA does have a way of making you get creative with the resources at hand.
We recently witnessed Twitter people murder ₦10k, but what if we told you it’s possible to make a decent pot of soup with ₦1k. We’ll show you how.
Melon soup
Source: Sisiyemmie
The key here is to stay within your budget, so don’t expect chunky proteins in your soup.
What you need:
Eja kika (round fish)– ₦300
Cameroon pepper – ₦100
Ground melon seeds – ₦200 (smallest tomato tin)
Palm oil – ₦100
Crayfish – ₦200
Average spend: ₦900. Serves two.
Groundnut soup
Source: Sisiyemmie
Groundnut is for more than snacking on when you want to drink garri. Try this low budget soup instead.
What you need:
Roasted groundnut: ₦200
Ponmo: ₦200
Palm oil: ₦100
Dried shawa fish: ₦300
Cameroon pepper: ₦100.
Total spend: ₦1000. Serves two.
Assorted fried stew
Source: Mumj3kitchen
Not exactly a baddie when it comes to soups, but you’ll have something to go with white rice.
Pepper – ₦300
Ponmo – ₦200
Crayfish- ₦100
Smoked mackerel – ₦300
Palm oil – ₦100
P.S: Buy the pepper from Hausa roadside traders, and not the market women. Average spend: ₦1000. Serves two.
Waterleaf vegetable soup
Source: Afrolems
Who says you can’t have options with a N1000 budget?
What you need:
Waterleaf: ₦200 (If you’re lucky, you can even find them growing somewhere in your area)
Source: The Guardian
Ponmo: ₦200
Iru (locust beans): ₦50
Eja kika (round fish): ₦300
Palm oil: ₦100
Habanero pepper: ₦100
Total spend: ₦950. Serves two.
Ogbono soup
Source: Instagram (@playfoodbyyinka)
Ogbono doesn’t get the love it deserves for offering so much value at minimal cost.
What you need:
Ground ogbono powder: ₦100
Cameroon pepper: ₦100
Crayfish: ₦200
Ponmo: ₦200
Ugwu leaves: ₦100
Eja kika (round fish) – ₦300
Total spend: ₦1000. Serves two.
Ila alasepo (Okra soup)
Source: Vee_Familylifestyle
Another low-budget soup that didn’t get its flowers until the join-body with seafood. This soup is a lifesaver.
What you need:
Okra: ₦200
Iru (locust beans): ₦50
Ponmo: ₦200
Cameroon pepper: ₦100
Eja kika (round fish): ₦300
Total spend: ₦850. Serves two.
Chicken feet pepper soup
Source: Blackpeoplesrecipes
There’s even something for when you want to set the club mood in your house.
What you need:
Peppersoup spice: ₦100
Scent leaf: ₦50
Cameroon pepper: ₦100
Chicken feet: ₦600
Total spend: ₦750. Serves two
There’ll be loads of food and drinks for the hottest babes at HERtitude23. Grab your ticket here.
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If you’re looking to justify your lavish spending, this list has the names of the best restaurants in Lagos that will give you your money’s worth. Finding that in this city is rare, we promise.
New restaurants pop up in Lagos everyday but many of them are just aesthetics and vibes, so we’ve done all the hard work and curated a list of the best places to eat out in Lagos.
With some that scream “I have money to blow,” these Lagos restaurants should be getting your coins every day.
Check them out in no particular order:
Maison Kayser
Photo: Instagram (@maisonkayser_ng)
Nestled in the highbrow area of Ikoyi, Lagos, this restaurant comes with an offering of the best pastries you can find in the centre of excellence.
Source: NightlifeNG
Think of natural breads, pastries, cakes, Italian gelato & French bistro dishes and this is the top Lagos spot for pastry lovers.
Menu: Chicken wings, Mozzarella sticks, Nachos, Chicken Fajita Sandwich, Ginger bread, Americano with whipped cream.
Branches: Eric Kayser VI – 864A, Bishop Aboyade Cole, Victoria Island, Lagos. Eric Kayser Ikoyi – 9, Osborne Road, Ikoyi.
Average spend: N10-15k per head.
Perks: Group/family friendly, take out.
Average customer rating: 4 stars.
Ocean5 by Riviera
Source: Oceans5 by Riviera
If you’re out for some fine dining, please gather your coins and set up camp here. The world class menu here will easily transport you out of Lagos to all the beautiful countries you can think of.
Bonus point: You get to make your own pasta on Thursdays alongside a supervising chef.
Photo: Oceans5 by Riviera
Menu: Savory steak with creamy mashed potatoes, sushi spread, peri peri chicken skewers, grilled shrimp tacos.
Branch: 20 Elsie Femi Pearse St, Victoria Island
Average spend: Nn15k-N20k per head.
Perks: Family friendly, Sunday buffet, walk-ins, parking.
Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.
NOK by Alara
Source: Awe Lagos
This Lagos restaurant continues to hold its own as one of the spots that gives you a mix of bougie and street realness. Whether you’re craving abula or want to get your hands dirty with a pot of nkwobi, it is the spot for you.
Source: NOK by Alara
Menu: Suya crusted steak, ewa aganyin, plantain pancakes with braised oxtail, snail bruschetta, abula,fried bean pancake with ugu, green shakshoukta, etc
Averal spend: N10- N20k per head
Branch: 12a Akin Olugbade Victoria Island, Lagos.
Perks: Walk-ins, takeout, outdoor garden, family friendly.
Average customer rating: 4 stars.
Ile Eros
Source: Bellanaija
If you’re in need of authentic Nigerian food with a modern twist, Ile Eros is the spot to be.
Chef Eros has a specially curated menu that makes you see your regular Naija staples in a new light. You know what’s even more interesting about this restaurant? They now have a branch in Los Angeles for our diaspora brothers and sisters.
Source: The quick finder
Menu: Dambu nama roll, sticky yaji wings, habanero zobo wings, jollof adugan, abula, turkey fried rice, smoked chicken yaji pasta, ayamase, etc.
Branch: 14 Kafayat Abdulrasaq Street, Lekki.
Average spend: N15k- N20k per head.
Perks: Fine-dining, takeout, group friendly.
Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.
Z Kitchen
Source: ZKitchen
The ‘kitchen’ might scare you into thinking you’re getting regular homemade meals but that is so not true. Z Kitchen easily ranks among the best restaurants in Lagos and you’ll know why when you pay them a visit.
Source: Zkitchen
Menu: Salmon platter, cheese platter, feta bake dip, trufle and cheese roll, eggplant bravas, buttermilk chicken and biscuits, crispy prawn rolls, prawn cocktail, beef sliders, etc
Average spend: N20k-N30k per head.
Branch: 19 Saka Tinubu St, Victoria Island 106104, Lagos.
Perks: Dine-in, takeout, group friendly, smoking patio, bar.
Average customer rating: 4.5 stars
Turaka Lagos
Source: Awe Lagos
Owned by media mogul, Mo Abudu of Ebonylife, this Lagos restaurant is a casual rooftop spot that offers you a generous view of the city. Definitely a spot to visit if you’re planning a picturesque proposal.
Source: Instagram (@turakalagos)
Menu: Beer batter fish, sticky pork ribs, Nigerian pepper soup, spicy seafood, vegetable panini, Turaka burger.
Branch: 1637 Adetokunbo Ademola Street, Victoria Island.
Average spend: N20-N25k.
Perks: Takeout, dine-in, comedy specials, rooftop view, delivery.
Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.
Shiro
Are you even a Lagos big boy/girl if Shiro hasn’t gotten your coins? Nestled within the popular Landmark centre, the offerings at this Pan-Asian restaurant takes your taste buds on a trip you won’t forget in a while.
Source: TripAdvisor
Menu: Cantonese chicken wanton, thai kwai seafood, crunchy gomae, sambal chicken salad, edamame, fiery grilled salmon, prawn in xo sauce, wasabi prawns, etc
Branch: Block XVI 3 & 4 Victoria Island Oniru Estate, Eti-Osa.
Average spend: N15- N25k per head.
Perks: Fine dining, dine-in, Sunday buffet, event friendly.
Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.
Ofada Boy
Source: Eat. Drink. Lagos
Think of Ofada boy as the king of the mainland. Food lovers have a love-love relationship with this restaurant because of the authentic African offerings and affordable prices. Easily one of the best restaurants in Lagos, Ofada Boy will feed you on a N5k budget.
Source: TripAdvisor
Menu: Ofada rice, village mixed ofada, seafood ofada rice, ofada kingdom, native soup, fisherman soup, jedi on the rocks, etc.
Branch: 1 Mba St, Surulere, Lagos Surulere
Perks: Private dining, family friendly, takeout, local cuisine.
Average spend: N5k-15k
Average customer rating: 4 stars.
RSVP Lagos
Source: TripAdvisor
If you want a feel of the USA in Lagos, this is the restaurant for you. Everything from the architecture and interior designs screams class. Definitely a place to come if you want to impress bae. Please, hold your bar.
Source: TripAdvisor
Menu: Spicy hummus, crab tacos, chicken skewers, spicy tuna maki, prawn summer roll, BBQ pork sandwich, sea bass, jumbo prawns, chicken katsu curry, etc.
Branch: 9 Eletu Ogabi St, Victoria Island 101001, Lagos
Average spend: N20k-N30k.
Perks: Dine-in, poolside bar, group friendly, private events.
Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.
Cactus
Source: TripAdvisor
Cactus Lagos is another notable mention, and we promise, this isn’t mere word of mouth. Whether you’re looking to catch breakfast, lunch, dinner or intercontinental dishes, you’ll find that there’s a place for you.
Source: Travel Waka
Menu: Avocado bruschetta, crispy calamari, 9ja bites, cobb salad, norge salad, Cuban steak sandwich, teriyaki noodles, etc.
Branch: 20/24 Ozumba Mbadiwe Ave, Victoria Island.
Average spend: N15k-N30k.
Perks: Group/family friendly, dine-in, takeout, private events.
Average customer rating: 4 stars.
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You’ve got the perfect plantain (not unripe or overripe). It’s sizzling nicely in hot oil. But you looked away for a second to scroll through Twitter, and golden brown has turned to devil’s charcoal.
With friends and family patiently waiting in your living room to feast, what do you do?
PAY ATTENTION FIRST: The hot babes will eat (and shake their booty) good at HERtitude 2023. Grab your tickets here to join them.
Photo: Instagram (@playfoodbyyinka) Protect the crime scene
You’ve messed up the easiest meal to make, and trust me, witnesses will use it against you. Lock that kitchen door until you somehow redeem the dodo.
Change the name to “charred plantain”
As the Sodiq Ologbon that you are, erase “burnt” from your vocabulary. Tell everybody that what you have on the menu is “charred plantain”.
Flip the switch
Chances are since you fried the plantain, you’re most likely going to serve it. Deception is key here. Plate your dodo so that only the good sides face up. If there are no good sides, refer to the next point.
Tell them you’re making gizdodo
Photo: Instagram (@playfoobyyinka) Throw in some gizzard, pepper, maggi and salt, and all will be well again. Tell the people eating to expect a hint of bittersweet notes.
We hear gizdodo will be on the menu at HERtitude2023. Join the hottest babes for the hottest women-only party EVER, on May 27 in Lagos. Grab your tickets here.
Become Dr Meredith Grey for dodo
No, I mean it. Grab a fresh pack of razor blades, cut out the burnt parts, and fry the plantain again.
Stall until everyone is famished
People rarely pay attention to the taste of food when hunger strikes. Hold on to that burnt dodo until it’s the only thing they want.
If all this fails, just RUN.
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You have to be living under a rock to not have heard of Hilda Baci, the 27-year-old chef who set out to break the Guinness World Record for the longest cooking marathon by an individual (86 hours and 45 minutes). And after a long weekend of back-to-back stirring and sprinkling, she finally did it on Monday, May 15, 2023.
Hilda Baci has united Nigerians like never before. But as the folks at Guinness get their ink ready to add her name to their list, here’s a brief history lesson on some of the other Guinness world record-breaking Nigerians you need to know.
Wizkid
Source: Wizkid Daily Everyone knows Big W has a Grammy and one of the best Nigerian albums of all time with Made in Lagos, but did you know Ayo from Surulere is also in the Guinness Book of World Records? Wizkid made history as the first Afrobeats artiste to enter the book when One Dance, his collaboration with Drake and Kyla, became the first song ever to reach one billion streams on Spotify in 2018.
Chidera Anemege
Source: Getty Images He is a Nigerian rapper based in the United States of America who set the record for the longest rap freestyle by an individual during the MTV O Music Awards in 2011. He rapped for nine hours straight.
DJ Obi
Source: The Guardian DJ Obi might be famous for Obi’s House now, but in 2016, he set a record for the longest-ever DJ set, with 240 hours of nonstop music at Sao Cafe in Lagos.
Femi Kuti
Source: Global Citizen Femi Kuti is an icon and the Guinness world record holder for holding a single note on a saxophone for 51 minutes and 35 seconds. He did this at a concert in the Fela Shrine in 2017.
Sandra Ikeji
Source: Instagram/Sandra Ikeji The CEO of Black Dove Models and sister to our fave chaotic Real Housewife, Laura Ikeji, secured a spot in the Guinness Book of Records for the most bridesmaids any bride has ever had on her train, with 200 bridesmaids at her 2020 wedding. We can only imagine how interesting their WhatsApp group must be.
Rema
Source: Billboard Rema is genuinely divine because there’s literally nothing he can’t do at this point. The Mavin/Jonzing singer entered the Guinness Book of Records in 2023 as the first artiste to top the MENA Charts with his single Calm Down. The MENA Charts is the inaugural Middle Eastern and North African chart that tracks the biggest songs in those regions.
Gbenga Ezekiel
Source: Radio Nigeria Skipping can be stressful, but Gbenga Ezekiel can’t relate, especially after setting the record for the most skips on one leg when he skipped 265 times in 2022. There are levels to this thing.
RECOMMENDED: These 9 Nigerian Songs Would’ve Slapped Harder at King Charles III’s Coronation
Stephen Keshi
Source: Goal.com The former Nigerian Super Eagles player and coach entered the Guinness Book of World Records when he became the youngest person to win the Africa Cup of Nations as both a player and coach. He first won the cup as a player and captain of the team in 1994 at 32, and then, as the team’s coach in 2013 when he was 51. He passed away in 2016.
Pinki Debbie
Source: Bella Naija Pinki Debbie is a Nigerian dancer and fitness enthusiast who’s famous for gaining entry into the Guinness Book of Records after dancing for 150 hours (seven days) straight in 2017. This record was previously held by Kaffy who led a dance party that lasted for 52 hours and three minutes back in 2006.
Harrison Chinedu
Source: The Sun Harrison Chinedu is a Nigerian footballer who entered the Guinness World Records after travelling 48.04 km for six hours and 15 minutes with a ball on his head. He set this record in 2016.
Haruna Abdulhazeez
Source: OloriSuperGal Haruna Abdulhazeez is a Nigerian tennis player who set the record for the most hits of a tennis ball with a tennis racket in one minute. He did this in 2018 when he recorded 187 hits in just one minute.
Adetunwase Adenle
Source: OloriSuperGal Adetunwase Adenle is a teacher and artiste with not one but four entries in the Guinness Book of World Records. He set his first record in 2010 when he brought 350 Nigerian children together to create the biggest painting by a large number of people — 63.5m x 49.3m. His second and third record came in 2011 when he organised an event with the most children (4,222) reading in one place, to encourage reading culture, and another with the highest number of children (37,809) washing their hands at the same time. Finally, in 2016, he set a new record for the world’s biggest post office stamp ( 2.448 m2).
Tuedon Morgan
Source: Wikipedia Tuedon Morgan is a two-time Guinness world record holder with the quickest half marathon on each continent (female) at ten days, 23 hours, and 37 minutes, and the quickest half marathon on each continent and the North Pole (female), with a record of 62 days, 12 hours, 58 minutes and 49 seconds.
Olawumi Treasure Bayode
Source: The Nation Bayo Treasure Olawunmi is the Guinness World Record holder for the longest reading marathon, after reading aloud for 120 hours (five days) nonstop in 2018.
Folashade Oluwafemiayo
Source: Premium Times Folashade Oluwafemiayo not only set a new record for the heaviest power lift by a female paralympic athlete with 155 kg at the 2022 Commonwealth Games, but she also broke her own record from 2020. Talk about iconic.
ALSO READ: We Don’t Rate You If You’re Not Listening to These 10 Female Artists
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Update: On Monday, May 15, 2023, Hilda Baci successfully cooked for 100 hours (with an hour-long break every 12 hours). Guinness World Records hasn’t officially confirmed it, but Nigerians have already crowned the chef a record-breaker, after surpassing Lata Tondon’s 88+ hour record and setting a new one.
Here’s what Hilda Baci shared with us just a week before she embarked on her viral cook-a-thon:
What goes into preparing to enter the Guinness Book of World Records?
A lot of work and a strong team.
It took me five years to be ready for this attempt. The record I selected — the longest cooking marathon — had just been broken when I reached out to Guinness World Records in 2018, so they said I had to wait a couple of years first.
How does one decide to beat a world record? Walk me through the stages of audacity
I was 21 when I first considered it seriously, but I didn’t have much of a platform. I was working 9-to-5 at a fashion retail company and didn’t have the resources to pull off such a huge project.
But I’m quite ambitious. That’s how I got into acting, presenting cooking TV shows and a talent show — MTN Yello Star 2020 — while working full-time in my early 20s. I go after the biggest possible projects to challenge myself to be the great person I’ve dreamt of becoming.
The Guinness World Record is something we heard and spoke about in awe as kids. It’s just one of those things that get brought up in schools once in a while. I’d always tell myself I’d do something to get myself in the book one day.
As I got serious about my cooking career, I revisited that dream and thought, “Why don’t I try to achieve it this way?”
What was it like hosting your own cooking show on TV?
It was fun and rewarding, but also stressful trying to get guests on board. I had to reach out to and DM celebrities all the time and a lot of them would just not respond. But that helped me build my networking and communication skills.
All my work experience before going full-time into my own business still helps me a lot. I worked almost round the clock cooking for a breakfast company for some years while I worked in TV, and that helps me handle my staff now. I’d wake up at 3 a.m. every day, running around between the two jobs and the market till late at night. It really brought out the hustler in me. I also met my current head of procurement at the breakfast company.
What challenges have you faced in your journey so far?
I’m still not taken seriously in the Nigerian food industry because I’m a young woman and unmarried. Many times, brands and the general audience don’t consider me a serious option because of the way I look. I want people to look beyond my appearance and know I put a lot of effort into my craft and business.
I want to be like Anthony Bourdain, a renowned chef who also established himself as a visionary in other creative fields: architecture, culture, fashion, journalism. I want people to respect me in that way. That’s part of why I want to break this record. At 21 though, it wasn’t God’s time yet because I didn’t have anyone who believed in the idea enough to help me plan it out.
What changed this year?
Over the years, I’d discussed breaking the cooking marathon record with many people, including the owner of the TV station that aired my cooking show on DSTV. But I didn’t find the right person until I talked to Nowe Isibor, one of my former cooking students, in November 2022. And everything just clicked.
She bought into it and brought the external ginger I needed. She became the project coordinator, building the team we now have around it.
Do you just write to Guinness that you’re ready to break a world record?
The Guinness World Records website is open to anyone from any country; there’s even a section for kids. After Nowe got on board, we went back to the website, filled out the form and submitted it for approval. I applied a couple of times before they approved because it’s similar to applying for a job or school admission; acceptance isn’t automatic.
They eventually emailed us the guidelines and set up my dashboard. After my cook-a-thon, I’ll have to send them video evidence. Their team will assess and then update my dashboard to say I’d either broken the record or failed.
Source: Premium Times To break the current record, you have to cook for four days. What’s the plan for that?
I’ll prepare about 80 recipes, but they’ll be repetitive. I could make Jollof six times in 24 hours. 80% of the recipes will be Nigerian cuisine. I’ll be making many different types of soups, porridge, rice and pasta. It’ll be a public event that people can RSVP to attend and eat as much as they can.
Sounds expensive
YES. It’s cost a lot just to get all the ingredients. It’s a very expensive dream, but I believe in it. All the food preparation will be a lot of work, but the guidelines allow me to have assistants to prep for me — wash, peel, chop, open seasonings — but not do anything related to the pot and fire.
I feel like running my restaurant hands-on and my Jollof face-off experience of 2021 is great preparation for this new challenge.
Yes. Please, tell me about going against Ghanaian chefs and solidifying our bragging rights as the country with the best Jollof
The face-off was interesting but terrifying because what if I didn’t win? Nigerians would’ve come for me.
So this happened around the time I opened My Food by Hilda. A couple of chefs were nominated by the public for the face-off to decide the best Jollof once and for all. About ten of us with the highest nominations had to submit a plate of Jollof to prove who was worthy to rep Naija. The organisers selected me, and that’s how I got to be the representative.
Source: News Wire And what’s the recipe for an international competition-winning jollof? How did you win?
I was intentional about how I prepared each of the ingredients. I made sure my beef stock was rich and well-sauced, I used a lot of fresh tomatoes and peppers and a good tomato paste brand, I let it burn a bit too because that’s part of the spice.
Then I had a lot of sides, from stewed turkey to coleslaw to moimoi to a special green sauce. But I actually didn’t serve the moimoi because I realised it was a Nigerian thing. I didn’t want the blind judges to tell I was the Nigerian rep and let bias win.
Smart move. How has the experience prepared you for this next-level cook-a-thon?
Cooking under pressure, especially for a long time is quite exhausting. I knew I had to spend the last week resting a lot, which is what I did. I’ll need all my strength to cook non-stop for four days. But last last, I enjoy cooking, so I hope I’ll have fun with it.
When and how did you discover this love for cooking?
It’s something I’ve always enjoyed doing. The first meal I ever cooked myself was Jollof spaghetti when I was in Primary Four. It was so nice, my mum asked me to make it again. But I goofed. I was seven years old, and it was too much pressure.
Cooking was never my ambition, but it followed me. I’ve always been the best cook in any space. I made the best fried rice in my Home Economics class in senior secondary school. And in university, my schoolmates would pay me to cook, then take the food to their boyfriends, pretending they made it themselves.
Who was your first cooking inspiration?
My mum. She’s always been big on experience when it comes to food. As a child, it was important for her to make sure we enjoyed the food almost too much. She didn’t mind spending all her money on a meal or killing herself in the kitchen. That influences how I prepare food for my clients today. Everything is made with love and that intentionality.
You’re from Akwa Ibom, and women from that part of Nigeria are often expected to be amazing cooks. What do you think of that expectation?
I’ve never had a negative reaction to it. I just know it’s not true. However, because I myself have always been good at it, I feel no pressure when I get that from people.
Did you ever train to cook, or is this entirely raw talent and passion?
I’ve never had formal cooking training. My work is powered by vibes and the Holy Spirit. But I’ll probably train one day, mainly because I teach people. I’ll probably reach a point where I want to learn more so I have more to offer my students.
Is there any meal you hate preparing?
Ekpankukwo. It’s delicious, and I make it well, but it’s a lot of work. With so many different ingredients — seafood, spices, the cocoyam — to prepare in a special way, it’s almost a full day’s work. I never look forward to making it.
If you could eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Easy, rice. I’d eat rice in its different versions every day. But if I had to pick one type, native rice.
You could become the face of Nigerian cuisine globally if your cook-a-thon succeeds. What would you do with that platform and visibility?
I love the sound of that.
I’ll make a conscious effort to propagate Nigerian recipes across the globe. Nigerian food is so good and works with many palates. So I want it to be a staple in international cuisine just like French or Italian.
RECOMMENDED NEXT READ: The Ultimate 30+ Guide to Understanding Nigerian Pop Culture
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From your food choice, we’ll know if you still have home training or drop when there’s a hot gist online.
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One day, you visit a friend, only to find out that they store garri in their fridge. Friends and family, I’m here to tell you that just because your mum does something doesn’t mean it’s correct to do it too.
Here are some things that shouldn’t be in your fridge, and if they’re, what it says about you.
Garri
If you store your garri in the fridge, people shouldn’t joke with you at all o. You’ll defo break bottle on your head to remind people you’re not normal, at least twice a week. I’ve never met a normal person who actually likes garri, so carry on.
Jollof rice
Jollof rice should be eaten hot and fresh, with heat nearly blinding you. Why are you eating jollof that has lost its essence from multiple defrosting? Are you against enjoyment?
Yam
Yam is already hard and void of love. You now want to store it in the fridge so it can get harder? It’ll turn into a rock-hard weapon that’s impossible to cut or peel, like you and all the layers of wickedness in your heart. Sheesh.
Plantain chips
If you store your plantain chips in the fridge, you’re definitely a first born used to hiding food from your siblings. Storing them in the fridge will ruin the experience, abeg.
Suya
Suya is supposed to be eaten hot, preferably on the road to your house, so you don’t share it. Anyone who can eat cold suya can eat a human being. Yes, I said it.
Bread
Your taste buds stopped working when you were ten years old, if you store bread in the fridge. Imagine choosing to defrost bread, might as well soak it in water and eat it like cereal.
Onions
Onions need to breathe somewhere dry. How do I know? The Zikoko Bureau of Statistics, of course. I just know you don’t allow the people in your life to breathe when you’re around.
Honey
Storing honey in the fridge is like locking your puppy in a closet — it’s cruel and unnecessary. Honey lasts forever; chilling it will just make it thick and difficult to use.
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Garri
First of all, who said eating garri had to be basic? Garri can be bougie too, you know. Add water to your garri to soften it, then pour over any salad mix, stir together and you’re good to go.
Suya
We know what you’re thinking – “Is Zikoko okay at all?” – But hear us out, you already eat suya with plenty of onions and pepper. Why not add all the ingredients of a salad to it to make it a little healthier?
Raw pepper
If you’re Yoruba and you enjoy eating salad, we know you’ve thought about doing this before. Don’t be scared to try it. You know you want to.
Shrimp
If you’re the type of person who wants to throw hands when they hear seafood slander, press your haters’ necks with a shrimp salad.
Nuts
Groundnut, tiger nut, and hazelnut, we all love to snack on these foods. Why not add them to your salad too? Unless you’re allergic to nuts, this is a whole meal.
Spicy Chicken
Chickens weren’t made to live on top of jollof rice forever. You need to get out of your comfort zone and try new things with it. Like using chicken to make a spicy salad.
Yam
Yam can be boring on its own. But you can’t deny that it slaps when you imagine it being nicely diced and mixed with other ingredients in a salad. It just fits right in.
Catfish
You might think the only appeal catfish has is pepper soup. But that’s because you’ve not tried grilling it and using it to make a salad. You’re eating fish on one hand, and on the other hand, there’s no other hand, it’s just fish salad.
The best thing about all these foods, is you don’t have to make them by yourself. So Fresh has made a set of new salads with unpredictable and exciting foods like Catfish, Suya, Pineapple salsa and Beans. You can find all the best combos on their website and make your pick.
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In the spirit of Valentine, we decided to give four foods a chance to write love letters to who they care about. Love Letters to Food.
Egg Sauce of life,
I’m in awe of you. I love how diverse you are. You can be cooked in so many ways with different ingredients. It’s one of the reasons why many people love you. You bring all the excitement to this marriage, and I’m grateful for it.
When I was dating stew, not only was I always bored, but I also felt incomplete, like something was missing. I couldn’t figure out what it was until I met you. It felt like an age-old connection was rekindled, and every moment we spend together, I appreciate all that you offer me.
You’re my best friend. I love that we can be romantic and lovey-dovey and also goofy and mischievous as hell. I remember when someone made us for lunch, ate a tiny bit and put the rest of us in the fridge. We felt so unwanted and wanted to get revenge so bad, we decided to fall on the floor the next time he took us out of the fridge. The look on his face was too funny.
You make life so easy; when people are thinking of what to eat me with, you always make yourself an available option, and I really appreciate that. In the midst of all the chaos in this country, you’ve been there for me. When people boil me too soft, you comfort me and tell me you’ll deal with the person. It’s so cute when you act like you can fight. I remember when you threatened to beat up that Chukwudi boy who cut me up haphazardly and then forgot about me until I got burnt because he went to watch a football match. I found it so sexy and adorable at the same.
I love how we work so well together, like we were meant to be. The way your sauce mixes with my soft body is the reason people love us so much. We’re the perfect breakfast combo. If anyone disagrees, they can argue with their frying pan. I hope we continue to make people happy during mealtime. I also hope I bring you even a fraction of the joy you bring me.
You have illuminated my life and enriched it far more than I could have dreamed possible. I can’t imagine my world without you. To more breakfasts and brunches.
Love,
Yam
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Whether it’s your job or Nigeria, we’ll know at the end of this quiz.
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In the spirit of Valentine, we decided to give four foods the chance to write love letters to those they care about. This is Love Letters to Food.
Dear Beans,
Remember when we were at a bukka and a man came in shouting that their food had given him explosive diarrhoea? He was so furious as told them how he spent his entire day in and out of the toilet and even finished all the tissue in the house.
We just sat in a corner laughing because you were the cause of his stomach problem. When you were being cooked, you pretended like you were done, so the seller put off the fire and served you like that. It was even funnier because I was on the plate with you and knew the prank you were about to pull. It was such a foolish prank.
I miss when we used to cause mischief. You were always ready to do foolish things with me, and that’s why you’re my favourite cousin in the entire world. You’re the one family member I genuinely get along with. Butter and egg are great, but they’re also boring. Their idea of fun is starting polls on who between them people prefer to eat me with. And I hate the polls because I’d rather be eaten with you.
People used to eat us together a lot. . They used to crave us so much that, before Thursday, we would’ve been served to at least 16 people in one bukka alone. We were the perfect team because we taste great for how cheap we are. But now, we rarely see each other.
You spend a lot more time with yam, plantain and rice. And I guess it’s because people don’t just want to eat you and me all the time. I’ve even seen you hang out with sliced bread and spaghetti a few times. And while I’m happy you get to spend more time with other foods (I’m not sure about you and spaghetti sha), I sometimes long for the days when it was you and I, with the others as “once in a while” options.
You’re not just my cousin, you’re my best friend. And despite all the foods I’ve met in this life, there’s no one like you. You’re so cool people even eat you alone and enjoy you. You make them gassy and that makes you such a fun food because there’s never a dull moment with you. Remember when we used to laugh at short people who ate a lot of you because they thought it would make them taller? Or when people used to dip me in Coke because that’s how much sapa had dealt with them. Good times.
Thank you for bringing excitement into my life. Thank you for showing me there’s more to life than sitting around and waiting to be eaten. As I’ve said about 100 times in this love letter, I miss you cuz. Life is boring without you. I really hope we get to spend a lot more time together this year. With the way the economy is going, more people will look for us soon, so be ready. We need to be there for them in their time of need.
I can’t wait to see you again.
Love,
Agege bread
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In the spirit of Valentine, we decided to give four foods the chance to write love letters to those they care about. This is Love Letters to Food.
Dear Fried Rice,
We get pitted against each other a lot, so people don’t really know how close we are. You’re the best friend I can’t do without. They see us as two competitors always fighting about who’s superior, but it’s so crazy how people don’t see that all our fighting is just banter. Like when you drag me for dating chicken because no one else can stand my wahala.
Every time I’m down or feeling a bit of self-doubt because one restaurant or caterer didn’t cook me well, you never fail to remind me I’m a bad bitch, that countries all over the world fight about which version of me is the best, and Nigerian households cook me anytime they get the chance. I don’t think I can be in a bad mood for too long when I’m around you because you always know the right thing to say to make me feel better. Even when you’re not physically there, one phone call to you and I’m all good. I couldn’t ask for a better best friend and partner.
You always say all these amazing things about me, but have you met you? You’re sweet, the most exotic type of rice there is, and anybody who disagrees can kiss a burning pot. You’re so full of life — only you has carrots, green peas, spring onions, bell peppers, shrimps and more. That’s why you give people around you life, and that’s why you’re a celebratory meal. You may not be cooked often in Nigerian homes, but that’s because they save you for special occasions. You’re that special.
I’m so glad we’re served together at most events. It has brought us closer than ever because we get to gist and gossip a lot. I love how we notice the same things; all we have to do is look at each other. I always have to hold myself from bursting out in laughter, and that’s what makes events fun for me. Whenever I’m served without you, it’s always boring because there’s no one to gist or make jokes with. All chicken knows how to do is complain that people don’t eat its bone in public. No one understands me like you do.
I can’t imagine what life would be like without you as my best friend. Who’d I complain to when one expensive restaurant adds too much curry to me? Remember the first time you met turkey, and he took you to a bukka for your first date? You thought turkey was one rich protein and that he was going to take you to an exotic fancy restaurant, only for you to end up in a bukka. It was such a hilarious experience.
Thank you for being the best friend any food could ask for, for staying by my side in the good times and bad. I love you, and I look forward to more chaotic times with you.
Happy Valentine’s Day, bestie.
ALSO READ: “I Feel Seen Because of You” – Love Letter From Gizzard to Dodo
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Trenches food is the cheap food people buy off the streets or roadside restaurants. The people of Twitter go on and on about how it’s the best kind of food out there, and to be honest, I don’t disagree. BUT not all of it is great, and that’s why I’ve decided to rank the top ten trenches foods from “hell no” to “top-tier”.
Eko and milk
Image credit: Kiki I’ve never had this, but I bet it tastes as unappealing as it looks. People who say they like this are lying. How can you eat something that looks so bland?
Spaghetti and Beans
Image credit: Bethsomediet I understand we’re talking about trenches food, but come on now, spaghetti and beans? Why did anybody think this would be a good combination? There’s no way this tastes good because the textures of both meals just don’t go together. The worst is rice, spaghetti and beans. You must be eating for eating sake if you eat that.
Yam and beans
Image credit:Veeluvstocook_ What is it with mama put and adding beans anywhere it’s not needed? Is yam and stew not good enough? Eating two heavy meals together can’t be good for anybody.
Agege bread and butter
Just bread and butter? No egg, beans, akara or even stew? It’s giving basic.
Akara and pap
Image credit: Cookpad
The best akara is the kind you buy from the mama down the road from your office at 7 a.m. before work starts. It’s straight out of the fire and goes perfectly with agege bread or pap hot enough to burn your throat. The bread is two days stale, and the pap is the kind they scoop with a big plastic cup.
Fried yam or potato with pepper sauce
Image credit: Lyndishes Whether you have it early in the morning, afternoon or at night, fried yam or potato with pepper sauce will always bang. Take note though, it must be served inside black nylon or newspaper. If they give it to you in a styrofoam plate, it won’t have the sweet trenches taste.
White rice and ofada sauce
Image credit: Nigerian food tv The rice has to come with ofada sauce that has enough pepper in it to make you cry, plenty of meat, two boiled eggs and five fingers of plantain.
White rice, stew and boiled egg
The egg has to be soaked in the stew, and the stew must have enough oil to reduce your life span by eight years. If not, the food won’t slap.
Mai shayi bread and egg
I’m not sure whether it’s the excess oil or how they press the bread in the frying pan after putting the egg in the middle, but mai shayi agege bread and egg sandwich tastes like it dropped from heaven.
Ewa agoyin and agege bread
Nothing beats trenches ewa agoyin. A restaurant opened up and tried to sell it in fancy packaging. That didn’t work out because the trenches is part of ewa agoyin’s sauce. It’s best served in a styrofoam plate with the oil dripping into the black nylon and staining everywhere.
ALSO READ: Ranked! Lagos Traffic Food
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It’s good to be adventurous with food, but Nigerians make some choices that should be considered a jailable crime. These ten things are the worst of them all.
Drinking garri with milk
I need the person who started this crime to explain what they were thinking. In what way is garri and milk a good combination? Is it cereal? (Anyone who just answered yes deserves punishment). The real criminals are those who do it with Ijebu garri.
Eating suya in the afternoon
Check the Nigerian constitution, and you’ll see it written there that suya must be made and eaten at night because “night” is the key ingredient. If you ever eat it in the morning or afternoon, you’re committing a federal crime, and you deserved to be flogged.
Saying Lagos bole is better than PH bole
First of all, this is just complete self-deceit. How can you see PH Bole in all its juicy gloriousness, with the fish, pepper sauce, soft ponmo etc., and say boring Lagos Bole is better? Don’t say it outside, or they’ll lock you up.
Taking cereal with hot water
Only babies are exempted from this because they have to eat soggy nonsense. They don’t have teeth. But as a grown adult without teeth problems, you should be deployed into the Nigerian army to eat corn and garri since you don’t appreciate good food.
Eating swallow with cutlery
Nigeria gained independence from the British in 1960. This means we no longer have to do things the way the colonisers taught us. So please, drop that fork and use your hand to eat that eba. If you don’t, it means you’re a coloniser and we’ll have to lock you up.
People who swallow swallow
If you swallow eba, amala, fufu, pounded yam or any other swallow, without chewing, you’re a cultist or hired assassin and that’s why you should be put in jail. You plus the person who named these foods “swallow” when they’re clearly meant to be chewed. We need a petition to change the name to “chewers”, please.
Eating anything that’s not rice and stew on Sunday
Who do you think you are, trying to break a lifelong tradition of eating rice and stew on a Sunday? Rice and stew was ordained as the traditional meal for Sunday lunch since before our parents were born. If you eat anything else, you’re dishonouring tradition, and the gods will flog you when you’re asleep at night.
ALSO READ: Will Nigerians Ever Settle These Food Wars?
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As an adult, why are you still using a spoon to eat rice? When you’re not a three-year-old being forced to finish your food before the school bus comes.
Here are 7 valid reasons why you should grow up and switch to a fork today.
To show you’re not greedy
I mean, why are you using a spoon to eat if you’re not a thief? For the same work rate, you might as well use a shovel.
RELATED: Interview With Spoon, Fork, & Knife: “Why We Usually Disappear”
To show you respect your ancestors
Forks will never disrespect your ancestors the way spoons do. The prongs were designed to let some food fall down for the gods. If your life is not doing okay, it’s because you use a spoon and your ancestors feel neglected.
To show you respect the food
Only people who don’t respect food would eat it fast. Good food should be approximated and chewed slowly to show you love how good it tastes, and you’re willing to be patient.
Because you’re an adult
For God’s sake, why would you rush your food like that? Ever seen a teenage boy heap food with a spoon? Yeah, that’s what you look like.
So the forks don’t get lonely
It’s just human decency to use the fork as much as you use your spoon. You don’t want them feeling left out and disappearing just because. Just be kind, abeg.
To chook anyone who tries to beg for food
Can you protect yourself with a spoon? No, but you can always use a fork to scare off those who don’t let others eat in peace.
It’ll never betray you when you wash it
One thing a fork will never do is spray water all over your body when you try to wash it. Do with that information what you must.
RELATED: 8 Things That Taste Better When They’re Free
Starting next week (January 31st, 2023) -
Bukka, Restaurant and Eatery have died. In the afterlife, they go before the god of enjoyment to make a case for why they should go to heaven.
Enjoyment: Angel Chukwudi, who’s going first?
Angel Chukwudi: My Lord, Bukka is going first.
*Bukka comes forward*
*Enjoyment opens a scroll containing everything about the life Bukka lived on earth*
Enjoyment: Bukka, during your time on earth, you:
– Sold food in nylon bags
– Cut meat into tiny pieces and sold each for ₦50
– Gave people running stomach because of unsanitary cooking conditions
– Were always rude and put sweat in people’s foods
– Almost always killed people with heat
Why should I let you into heaven?
Bukka: Oh god of enjoyment, praise be unto thee. As you know, I was solely created to feed the masses, and I believe I did my job very well. I didn’t serve everyone food in nylons; only those who didn’t bring their plates or want to pay for my takeaway packs. Takeaway packs are expensive, so I couldn’t just give them out for free. I needed to make money for my business. About the food poisoning, it’s only people with weak-ass stomachs that got sick. My people on the streets stood strong.
Enjoyment: Ah, Bukka!
Bukka: Yes, my god. It’s true nau. I’m sorry for the unsanitary conditions. Some were out of my control, and others, I should’ve properly taken care of. As for the rude, sweaty servers, ahn ahn, you know it’s part of the ingredients that make the food sweet nau. I wouldn’t be called a Bukka if not for those two major items. And also, I used to give people regular-sized meat before, but when Buhari started showing us shege and the economy became tough, I had to start cutting the meat into two.
Enjoyment: Hmm
Bukka: My god, I saved lives by providing plenty food at cheap prices. No matter how tough the economy became, I didn’t change much. I was there making sure people ate always.
Enjoyment: Okay, I’ve heard you. Move one side. Who’s next?
Angel Chukwudi: Restaurant, my Lord.
*Restaurant walks to Enjoyment’s throne*
Enjoyment: *Reading from his scroll* Restaurant, you committed two major sins that make me want to send you to hell without even hearing you out:
– Charging people ridiculous amounts of money for tiny food that hardly ever tasted nice. How do you put one tablespoon of rice and one teaspoon of sauce and charge ₦20k for it? I shouldn’t allow you into heaven no matter what you say.
– Always wasting people’s time before serving their food. Why did people have to wait 45 minutes for you to cook the tiny portions of food?
Honestly, why should I send you to heaven?
Restaurant: Oh Lord of Enjoyment, I hail thee. My Lord, you know I was created for the high-class people, people rich enough to afford me…
Enjoyment: So high-class people didn’t deserve to eat? They always went back home to eat eba.
Restaurant: They deserved to eat, and that’s why they always had the chance to order more…
Enjoyment: With those prices?
Restaurant: My king, you’re not letting me explain myself.
Enjoyment: Because you were a thief. You made people pay your expensive rent in the name of food.
Restaurant: I was an experience. People didn’t just come to me for food but also for my ambience and aesthetics which allowed people to take beautiful Instagram reels and pictures. I kept influencers and food bloggers in business because they used me to create content. And just like Bukka fed the masses, I fed the rich people. It’s the same thing.
Enjoyment: Sigh. Move to the side. Who’s next?
Angel Bimbo: Eatery, my Lord.
Enjoyment: Where’s Chukwudi?
Angel Bimbo: He went to check why Bistro hasn’t gotten here yet.
Enjoyment: Oh that wasn’t a Bistro. It was just another restaurant calling himself a Bistro. He didn’t even know the meaning of the name.
Angel Bimbo: Thank you for clarifying, my lord. Eatery, you’re next.
*Eatery walks forward*
Enjoyment: Eatery, I don’t think you have to make a case. You did well. You sold decent food and had clean conditions, except when it came to your toilets. You even entertained people with the latest music videos — and sometimes, football matches — round-the-clock. Then, you had mostly nice workers and gave us perfect inventions like Chickwizz. You weren’t bad at all. You’ll make heaven.
Eatery: Oh god of enjoyment, thank you so much. Thank you.
Enjoyment: Bukka and Restaurant, come forward.
Bukka, you did good work on earth by giving my people cheap food. They could come to you with just ₦1k, and they’d eat well. Because of this, I’ll let you into heaven.
Bukka: Thank you so much, my king and god.
Enjoyment: Restaurant, you detty liar. You live a fake life, and I’m not letting you into heaven.
Fine Dining: Ah, god of Enjoyment. Please, don’t do this to me *He starts to cry* Please, hear me out.
Enjoyment: Take him away!
ALSO READ: POV: White Rice Cheats on Stew With Egusi
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Every micro-influencer and their grandma has a “GRWM: meal prep for the week” video on Instagram or Twitter. At this point, if I see anymore of these videos, I’ll scream. I thought we were all struggling and stuff. Isn’t the economy crashing in your area?
Food is supposed to bring you joy, especially now that life is tough. I tried to meal prep for a week, and here are my thoughts.
I’ve eaten everything in one day. Now what?
What happens when you meal prep those super small portions, and now, you’ve eaten five out of ten plates before they even freeze? Food is nice the day you cook it, and your brain will just keep saying, “Just one more bite”. Next thing, it’s all gone. Not me, though, but y’all be safe.
RELATED: Everyone Loves These 10 Meals, Until It’s Time to Prepare Them
Is meal-prepping sibling-proof?
I’m a big believer in not tempting people to do things that might make me want to commit unalive. Anyone with siblings knows you can’t even leave water in the fridge without them drinking it, and now, you’re saying I should basically leave them a feast? Be fucking for real, abeg.
Eating the same thing is boring!
Didn’t we all want to stop being kids so badly so no one could tell us we couldn’t eat whatever we want whenever we wanted? You’ll eat dry spag and sauce for lunch for one-week straight and wonder why your brain keeps telling you to fight your coworkers. Sis, it’s unahppy.
Have you eaten defrosted rice?
As a Nigerian, half our foods are rice. So you too, imagine making a big batch of village or coconut rice and deciding to portion it out to last a week. By the third day, the sad state of the rice will make you want to cry. Sad food doesn’t slap!
The time you said I’ll save, I’m wasting it
They keep pushing this propaganda that meal prepping helps you save time, and I’m yet to see how. Cook one big batch of food that it does to make small tiny meals every day. Don’t ask me how I know. I just know.
What if it’s tastes bad?
We all make mistakes sometimes, what if I make a big batch of food, and it tastes horrible? Now, I have to suffer in silence for a week? Small portions will never do that to you.
Do you have shares in NEPA?
How will you guarantee they’ll bring light consistently enough for the food’s quality to remain intact in the freezer? What about when I’m ready to eat, and I need to use the microwave? Does meal prepping come with a different NEPA perk?
RELATED: If You Don’t Use These 7 Ingredients to Cook, You Have a Problem
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Welcome to my YouTube channel, where I tell people what to do and not do with food and drinks. Today, we shall be talking about our food resolutions for the year. If you don’t want us to fight, do all the things I‘ve listed below.
Kill chicken
At your big age, you don’t know how to hold a chicken to the ground and kill it? Come on now. You’re too big for this. This is a skill people add to their CVs, and you don’t have it? Do better this year.
Eat semo
Growing up means realising semo isn’t that bad, and people are just overdoing it with the slander. Give semo a try. I promise, you’ll see the light.
(This isn’t Dammy o. My account was hacked by Memi. Semo is trash.)
Attend more food events
Stop waiting for the end of the year to attend overcrowded food festivals. Many events happen throughout the year — BBQs, potlucks, yam and plantain festival, cocktails, etc. You just have to shine your eye and ears.
Eat Korean food
Are you not tired of going to that Chinese restaurant every single time you’re looking for where to eat? You want to say you’ve also been to Japanese restaurants. Good for you (even though all you ate was sushi and rice).
Make homemade pasta
Just realised this isn’t as hard as all those fancy chefs make it seem online. Apparently, you can even do this without some big-ass machine. I think everyone shoud make their own pasta at least once, just for the fun of it.
RELATED: Make Bougie Creamy Pasta With Less Than ₦10k
Try okra ice cream
This agenda must agend because okra ice cream slaps. Remember the famous saying, “Don’t judge an ice cream by it’s name and ingredients.”
Have a cocktail competition
Gather your friends together and see who can make the best cocktail from basic ingredients. This is actually so much fun, and the fact that everyone will end up drunk is a bonus.
Go outside your comfort zone
This year, just be adventurous with food. Try meals from other tribes you’ve only ever heard about online, try a difficult recipe, eat that food you stopped liking many years ago, eat at a beer parlour, put pineapples in your burger and cheese in pancakes. Just don’t be basic.
Drink water
Because you people always forget to drink at least two litres a day and that’s not healthy. I need y’all alive and well to read Zikoko articles.
Ban fufu
Yes, semo is trash, but fufu is its oga. If you’re out here eating fufu, it means you can comfortably pick something from a toilet dustbin to eat.
Stop eating rice and tomato stew
We’re no longer in the days of our parents when the only thing they ate with white rice was either standard tomato stew or soup that was meant for swallow. There are way too many sauces out there for you to try with your rice. Don’t limit yourself.
Order something new at a restaurant
You order things like rice, burger, pasta, chicken and chips, and in your mind, you’ve gone to a restaurant to eat. Stop deceiving yourself. Open that menu, and order a meal with a name that’s hard to pronounce. Let’s start from there.
ALSO READ: All the Many Different Ways You Can Get Free Food in This Economy
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Moderator: Happy New Year and welcome to 2023! This year, we have a long list of people who want to make their case in front of the judge. For our first debate of the year at Zikoko HQ, Amala, Eba and Pounded Yam will go against each other for the title of “Best Swallow in Nigeria”. To make it more interesting, Semo will make a case for why they should be included as one of the top swallows.
As usual, there are two rounds. The three parties will present their arguments to the judges in the first round. They have two minutes each, so they have to be as brief as possible. In the second round, they’ll go toe-to-toe. May the best swallow win.
Eba, you’re up first.
(Eba walks to the stand)
Image credit: Tribune online Eba: Good morning my able panel of judges, accurate timekeeper and moderator. My name is Eba, and I’m here to assert the motion that I’m the best swallow in Nigeria. You see, I’m a staple food in every Nigerian home. When there’s nothing to eat, I’m there. And unlike Amala, I’m not limited to one soup.
Amala:
Eba: I’m the cheapest swallow, and I come in many variations — yellow, white and Ijebu garri — so people get to experience me differently. Oh, and let’s not forget I’m easy to make. I’m ready in five minutes, and you don’t have to use all the power in your body to turn or pound me.
(Eba walks back to their seat as Amala walks to the stage)
Amala: There is this constant debate about whether I’m trash or not. But the people who say I’m trash usually haven’t tried me yet.
Exhibit A
I may be tough to make, but trust me, I’m worth the wait.
Pounded yam: Are you flirting with the judge?
Amala: Shut up. What are you saying?
Like I was saying, I’m not a common commodity eaten by everybody, like eba and pounded yam. I’m a rare gem. I’m mostly seen at parties where people rush me. My dear audience, how many times do people ask for eba at parties? Are they even invited for parties? Exactly. I’m the most talked about swallow, and if I wasn’t the best, people wouldn’t be out there fighting for me.
(Amala walks back to their seat as pounded yam mounts the stage)
Pounded yam: Good morning, everyone. My name is pounded yam, and I’m THE best swallow in Nigeria. First of all, I’m the only sweet swallow; people can decide to eat me without soup, and I’ll still taste delicious. My skin is smooth, so unlike eba, I won’t get stuck in your throat. Swallows like semo and fufu tried to copy me but they didn’t turn out right, and that’s why many people don’t like them. I’m wanted both at home and at parties, and that’s why I’m the best.
(Semo walks to the stand)
Image credit: Business day Semo: I’m tired. I’m tired of the constant semo slander. Many years ago, people loved me. I was one of the top swallows in many households. Then the Gen-Zs and younger millennials came around and started tainting my name. Now, pounded yam has the audacity to tell me I’m trying to be like them. Me!
Amala: Ermmm. This isn’t supposed to be a movie monologue. It’s a debate. Get to your points.
Semo:
I need people to stop slandering me. Not only is it affecting my mental health, but also, everything bad being said about me comes from Gen-Zs. So clearly, there’s an agenda against me. How can you say I taste like ass when Fufu exists?
I look and taste good. If not, why did Brighto always cook me in the Big Brother Naija house that year? If I’m that bad, why are factories still producing me? Clearly, I’m wanted. It’s 2023, time to stop with the insults and grow up. I’m a good ass swallow (no pun intended), and I deserve to be added to the list of best swallows.
(Semo walks back to their seat, and the moderator returns to the stage)
Moderator: Well done on the first round. Now, it’s time to face one another. You have five minutes.
Amala: Pounded yam, how do you expect to be the best swallow when people have to suffer from body aches every time they pound you?
Pounded yam: If you had some sense, you’d know there are new methods that don’t involve pounding.
Eba: I don’t even know why this debate exists. I’m clearly the best. Do you know how many times I’m eaten in a week? Some people even eat me for breakfast and lunch.
Amala: Being cheap and available to be used by everybody doesn’t make you the best. It just means you’re low-quality.
Eba: Coming from the person who’s constantly called trash? Not the pot calling the kettle black.
Amala:
Semo: I don’t care about all these things you people are saying. I just want everyone to agree I deserve to be at the top just like all of you.
Amala: See this plagiarised pounded yam talking. Abeg, shift.
Semo:
Eba: Please, don’t make pounded yam feel important. *Looks at pounded yam* People barely eat you or talk about you. Sometimes, we even forget you exist. Even semo is more talked about than you. Even if it’s slander.
Semo:
Pounded yam: What is this one saying? You that tastes like sand. You’re only good for sticking things on the wall.
Amala: And you have a serious case of identity crisis because you can’t decide if you want to be yellow, white or Ijebu.
Eba: Are you mad?
Amala: And Pounded yam, you make people feel too heavy. That’s why they don’t like to eat you.
Pounded yam: People don’t like to eat you cause you’re black.
Amala: Wow! The colourism jumped out. Not that I expected better from a light-skinned person anyway.
Moderator: Okay, that’s enough. Time’s up. Let’s take a short break to give the judges time to collate the results and decide on a winner.
(One of the judges walks to the stage)
Judge: You all did well in your arguments. But a winner must be decided.
Judge: And the best swallow to exist in Nigeria is… Amala!
Amala:
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From owambe jollof to Lagos babe pasta and Iya Basira amala, food has proven to be more than something merely eaten to survive. It’s a love language, a coping mechanism, a way of life— God’s gift to humanity. But you can also make money from just eating, and these helpful tips will show you how.
Work as a home economics teacher
Check the meaning of “enjoyment” in the dictionary, and you’ll probably see a home economics teacher holding a big cooler of rice and jug of freshly pressed juice. This job is especially perfect if you hate cooking because all you have to do is share recipes for the students to make the meals. It’s like having a private chef, only at the end of the month, you’re the one getting paid salary.
Work at a restaurant
Trust us, the only reason you think working from home is better than working from the office is because you haven’t worked at a restaurant before. Because how can anyone turn down an offer to be surrounded by free food? Just be praying they don’t get plenty customers sha, so you’ll have plenty leftovers to take home.
Become a judge on a cooking show
This one is easy. All you have to do is sit down and wait for people to try and impress you with their cooking. If you’re hungry and the food is taking time to be ready, just remind them that their clock is ticking and watch them move at twice the speed. You also never have to worry about getting small meat because they want you to like them.
Crash a wedding
Looking for where to find the two things you love — food and money — in one place? Try a Nigerian wedding. Dress up nice so no one will figure out you’re doing mogbo moya. After eating to your heart’s content, you can proceed to dance with the couple and pick money as people are spraying them.
Become a content creator
Content creation is the in thing now, and you need to hop on it. Apart from the money and fame you’d enjoy as an online celeb, you also get invited to restaurants to review their menus and post about it — it’s giving food critic. But make sure you focus on the food niche, not TikTok dances and skits.
Apply for food competitions
We’re not sure how the selection process works, but do whatever you can to be in these competitions. Not only do they give you food that’ll last you for two days, but they’ll also give you prize money if you eat it all on time. Enjoyment no pass like this.
Cook with Knorr
Imagine spending money to buy food when you can be cooking equally delicious meals in your house and getting ₦5k when you use Knorr.
Knorr has launched the Unwrap and Win Promo to reward users for basically cooking and eating foods they already love. And all you need to do is check the wrap of your Knorr seasoning cube for a hidden code, send the code to 8011 and win ₦5k cash or ₦1k airtime instantly.
Visit the website to purchase your Knorr packs, and Instagram to follow the conversation online and secure your own urgent ₦5k.
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One sure way to show people on social media that you’re enjoying Detty December is by posting pictures from fancy restaurants. Even though Nigerian restaurants cost an arm, foot, liver, beard and edges, they’re the new December concerts, and there’s nothing we can do about it.
If, like me, you’re on a small budget, here are some tips on how to get the most out of your Detty December restaurant experience without using your family’s last born for rituals.
Ditch your broke friends
Sure, birds of the same feather flock together, but don’t you want to bamba and flock with the big birds? See, if you really want to enjoy the restaurant experience during Detty December, you need to let go of the broke people in your life and elevate to the IJGBs (with their pounds and dollars) and other rich people who can comfortably say, “Oh, I have it covered,” when the bill arrives.
You can go back to your broke friends in January. If they genuinely care about you, they wouldn’t mind. A win for one is a win for all.
Become a vegetarian
Restaurant food is expensive, but you see that extra protein on top? Omo, it’ll book you a first-class ticket to SAPA-land. You don’t need to have steak or prawns, dear. Tell the chef to make pasta with onions and Indomie spices. Oh, and no one will even try to drag you because being vegetarian is a cool kids’ thing these days. #PETA4Life
Eat before you leave your house
One thing about fancy Nigerian restaurants is they’ll serve you the same portion of food they’d serve a chihuahua (and add two or three leaves if you’re lucky). Restaurants are for vibes and aesthetics, not food. So if you don’t want to be unfortunate or tempted to order dessert, better do the right thing and boil small rice before you step out.
Take pictures before the bill comes
Nothing will ruin your mood faster than getting the bill. Trust me, I’m talking from experience. By the time you’ve looked at the food bill, service charge, VAT, Tinubu charge, VPN charge and Red Cross charge, all the vim you had to take pictures will disappear. Please, don’t waste your baff-up or money. Take those pictures before the bill arrives, to avoid stories that touch.
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Look for food-tasting events and crash it
It’s December, so you can be sure at least three or four new restaurants will open every weekend before we enter 2023. Whether you’re on the guest list or not, I suggest you find your way into those restaurants on opening day because most of the food will be free. Don’t tell anyone we told you. But most importantly, don’t you dare mention Zikoko if they catch you.
Tell people you’re on an alcohol cleanse
Who alcohol epp? Have you seen the price of cocktails these days? And all because they can light the drink on fire. No, thank you. Why pay ₦10k for a cocktail when you can buy cheap wine or make one of these crazy cocktails recommended by Zikoko writers in the comfort of your home. If people ask why you’re not drinking, tell them you’re on an alcohol cleanse or you’ve given your life to Christ.
Attend every family event
Will you have to endure your aunties and uncles asking you why you’re a single pringle? Yes. But is the food free? Also, yes. Has anyone ever died from insort? No. So, suck it up and go to big mummy’s house in Surulere for free food.
Flirt with the waiter
Like they say in Nollywood, “Scratch my back, and I’ll scratch your back.”
If you want portions that’ll fill one-quarter of your stomach and food that’ll come out on time so you can take pics for socials, you need to be on the waiter’s good side. All the shouting you’re doing to show yourself will only motivate them to spit in your food. A word is enough for the wise sha.
ALSO READ: The Zikoko Guide to Drinking at a Party
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First, we saw a charcuterie board, and it was fine; cheese, crackers and fruits — it ate. Then TikTok people started making sushi boards, butter boards, etc, and it made me wonder, what if we had Nigerian food boards? Which one would bang? Well, I have thoughts.
Abacha board
I mean, come on, this is greatness waiting to happen. Each side of the board would have different toppings — ugba, garden eggs, fish and ponmo. Every bite would be a burst of flavours. This needs to happen yesterday, for my sanity.
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Swallow board
Imagine if you went to a restaurant to try some random soup, and a swallow board accompanied it. Sometimes, you’d want the softness of wheat after eating pounded yam, or eba after a couple of spoons of amala. A little bit of everything at your fingertips, god, abeg.
Plantain board
Do I even need to talk too much? As someone who recently saw the light in plantain, I say this should already exist. From good old fried plantain — it must be soft by the way — to plantain chips, unripe porridge, gizdodo, plantain and beans, the possibilities are endlessly sweet.
Assorted meat board
If you close your eyes, you can almost taste the beef and chicken suya, asun and Isi Ewu. Let your imagination run wild, and just sprinkle yaji pepper on top. I’d willingly break the bank for this instead of overpriced breakfast platters.
Puff-puff board
With chocolate-drizzled puff-puff and puff-puff sprinkled with pepper, every angle of the board would be a treat. We could experiment with puff-puff and stew. Puff-puff is bread that studied abroad, after all.
Old-school snacks board
Imagine pako and okin biscuits, baba dudu and co, all on one platter. All our childhood causes of toothache in one place sounds like bliss to me.
Rice board
This board takes “There’s rice at home” to another level. One thing Nigerians are great at is making several different types of rice. Our Jollof slaps, vegetable rice is heavenly, and there’s even concoction rice for when sapa has you in a chokehold. Just imagine them spread out on a board.
READ ALSO: We Ranked 10 Nigerian Rice Meals From the Best to the Most Unnecessary
