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Do you have some village people disguising themselves as family members? If you see these signs, then that’s probably the case.
PS: We’re not saying you should confront them sha. But these signs can help you stay guiding.
They’re always calling to check up on you
See, village people thrive on getting the latest information. The more they hear from you, the more they can plan how to pour sand in your garri.
They actually remember your birthday
Think about it. How come they remember your birthday every year? Something is fishy somewhere.
They give you unsolicited advice
Because they’re trying to mess everything up for you. If you like, follow them anyhow.
They keep asking you when you’ll marry
They know you’re in the streets but they still want you to hang your boots so early. If it’s not wickedness, what’s it, please?
RELATED: 13 Things That Happen When Your Village People Want to Spoil Your Wedding Day
They give you gifts often
Once they give you something like a bunch of plantain or a tuber of yam, make sure you ask them to eat with you.
They appear in your dreams
See, if this happens, just cover yourself with the blood of Jesus.
You’re not even sure how you’re related to them
Once you start hearing that they’re the younger brother of your aunty’s cousin, run!
NEXT READ: 10 Solid Proof That Your Village People Are After You
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Your village people won’t wear a sign stating their agenda in your life, which is why you should identify them before they come after you.
These are some ways to fish them out.
1. They stan patience Ozokwor, Kanayo O. Kanayo and Chiwetalu Agu
If you think this is a coincidence, think again. From who they stan, you shall know them.
2. They always know about good things that happen in your life before you tell them
If you ever share good news with someone, and they say they’re already aware of the developments, fear them. That’s a village person right there.
3. They work in NEPA office
I mean, this is the biggest red flag of all. That’s why there’s always a power outage when you’re about to iron your work clothes.
4. They ask questions like “How are you?” too often
How else will they confirm if their plot against you is working if they don’t ask about your well-being? Better reply with “I’m fine” and avoid them.
5. They’re the first and last person you see daily
Village people thrive on dominating your life. So, the more you see of them, the better their chances of putting sand in your garri.
6. They smile too much when you’re around
This is one of the tactics they use to mask their village-peopleness. Don’t for fall it.
7. They appear in your dreams
Plead the blood of Jesus and mark their face.
8. They laugh at your misfortunes in the name of “jokes”
The only reason why they find your downfall funny is because they caused it. Classic village person move.
9. If you see this type of pot in their house
Never eat food cooked in a pot like this if you like your destiny.
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So you’ve had your visa interview, got your visa and you’re finally about to take that trip you’ve planned for years. But your mom has told you not to tell anyone you’re travelling until you get back. You’re wondering why? We’ll tell you.
Your village people don’t want you to travel
This one goes without saying. If your village people, who hate your family because you’re more successful than them find out you’re traveling, they can easily get you. They’re witches so they’re in the air; you’re in a plane, so it goes without saying that you’re in the air. It’s the best place to get you. All they need to do is make the aircraft develop faults that would lead to a crash. If you’re not going to tell people you’re not travelling, family members top that list.
“This boy is not going anywhere” You’re not Santa Claus
Traveling to the abroad means you have money. Nigerians don’t want to know otherwise. You’re going there to blow one million dollars everyday so why shouldn’t your family and friends get their share? They’ll disturb you everyday to buy shoes and chocolates for them. And if you say no, you’re proud and evil. Don’t say no, just don’t let anyone know you’re traveling.
To Avoid “Whining”
Okay maybe this isn’t one of your mother’s reasons but it’s a valid reason. Once you mistakenly step inside an airplane, people automatically think you’ve arrived. When they see you, they start calling you “Money man” or “Oga Madam”. When they start using names like that for you, people will think you have money and your helper might think you don’t need their help because you’re already an Oga Madam. You know how Nigerians are.
To Avoid Deliveries
You’re not DHL. It’s when you travel people will begin to remember that they have an uncle in Atlanta that they want to take fish to, and get shoes from. Or that they want to buy Crocs. And they won’t pay for your extra luggage. Let’s be guided please.
And if you still go ahead and tell people you’re travelling, after all we’ve done for you, whatever befalls you is your problem not ours. You know what they say about a word? Well, that’s right; it’s enough for the wise.
