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trust issues | Zikoko!
  • If You Put Your Trust in These Nollywood Characters, Sorry To You

    If You Put Your Trust in These Nollywood Characters, Sorry To You

    With Nollywood, you almost never know what to expect, except, of course, when it comes to their leads. They go through trials and tribulations and come out the other side sparkling new, until life happens and you start second-guessing everything you know about them.

    The Band of Merry Men

    They might have good intentions, but still, it’s four men in their late 30s cosplaying Robin Hood. What if they’re keeping some of the money they steal from corrupt politicians? What if their entire operation is a massive money laundering scheme? Think about it.

    Eniola Salami in King of boys

    You might want to argue, but you can only ever trust Alhaja Eniola Salami to an extent. What if she needs you out of the way to get to her goal? What if you make one little mistake that upsets her? What if someone lies on your head, and she wants to use you as a scapegoat? The questions are endless, and that means anyone that works with her might continue looking over their shoulder till it happens.

    Sarah in Blood Sisters

    Honestly, you should only trust Sarah if she doesn’t know a damning secret about you If you mistakenly put your life in her hands, there’s a big chance she’ll give away all your important information and leave you scrambling for safety.

    Femi Beecroft in Chief Daddy

    Why anyone would take a look at Famzy money and thing he’s to be trusted is beyond us. You might think you’re his friend, but that man would sell you and your family members if it means he’ll get money for his music career. He’ll probably do it by mistake too, which is like a million times worse.

    Ifebuchi in Soole

    None of the people on that bus were trustworthy, but special mention goes to the man that had jazz all along, only revealed it at the last minute only to disappear with the money everyone put their life on the line for.  Yes, he later sent everyone’s share , but why did he  wait that long?

    Ishaya in Far From Home

    Anyone that says they trust Ishaya obviously doesn’t like themselves very much. After he makes the worst decisions and you somehow survive it, he’d come back to ask for your forgiveness.

    Tayo in The Men’s Club

    We understand that his first marriage wasn’t exactly the happiest, but you can’t deny that he has problems being alone, and that means he’s almost always in multiple relationships at once. Maybe he’s changed now that he’s found love, but Tiara should give him like a quarter of her trust and save the rest for a rainy day.

  • 15 Reasons Every Nigerian Grew Up With Trust Issues

    15 Reasons Every Nigerian Grew Up With Trust Issues

    Due to all the lies we were sold by our Nigerian parents, a lot of us grew up with serious trust issues. Here are 15 of the worst ones that shaped the way we behave today.

    1. Hearing “Beans will make you tall,” but you’re still the size of bedside fridge.

    Chai! All that beans I ate.

    2. When your father told you to go and wear your shoes, but then drove off.

    The pain is still fresh.

    3. When you asked your parents for a Game Boy and they got you:

    ARE THEY THE SAME?

    4. The Barney and Father Christmas your school brought for the end-of-the-year party:

    Who are these ones?

    5. When you finally came first and reminded your father that he promised to buy you something.

    Ah! Is it like that?

    6. When you ask your mother for all the money she has been “helping” you save.

    “Have you not been eating in my house?”

    7. When your mother told you that your agemates will be at the Owambe, but you only see adults.

    The worst.

    8. You, the first time you saw someone put stew on their jollof rice:

    What is doing you?

    9. Whenever you opened that icecream container you saw in the freezer.

    THE DISAPPOINTMENT!

    10. When your mother that beat you for lying told you to lie that she is not around.

    Oh? It’s like that?

    11. Whenever you opened the Danish cookies container in your mother’s room.

    THE BETRAYAL!

    12. When that shirt your mother swore you’d “grow into” is still not your size 10 years later.

    See why I don’t trust people.

    13. When your father just zooms past Mr. Biggs on the way from church.

    If we don’t eat meatpie on Sunday, when will we ehn?

    14. When your mother that said “let’s be going” an hour ago is still gisting.

    Can we go oh?

    15. When your mother that said “tell the truth, I won’t beat you” says “go and bring the cane.”

    Na me mess up sha.

  • For Everyone Who Agbalumos Have Given Trust Issues

    For Everyone Who Agbalumos Have Given Trust Issues

    Biting into a sweet agbalumo is an indescribable feeling, but the chances of getting one that actually lives up to expectations are pretty low. So, we’ve gathered 12 tweets you’ll relate to if the struggle of finding the perfect agbalumo has given you trust issues.

    1. Agbalumo, the gambler’s fruit.

    2. When you’re never lucky enough to get the sweet agbalumo.

    https://twitter.com/thegbemisolarh/status/1090133594771783682?s=20

    3. “Slap in the middle” or whatever Davido said.

    https://twitter.com/Debz004/status/1217198674037628928?s=20

    4. When the agbalumo seller lies straight to your face.

    https://twitter.com/Attorney_Diro/status/1217463470544838661?s=20

    5. When the best-looking ones taste the worst.

    https://twitter.com/adedxyin/status/1217597298911391746?s=20

    6. No one, not even Peruzzi, slaps harder than an agbalumo.

    https://twitter.com/Blaaq_ie/status/1147167891822960642?s=20

    7. When you slip up and call it “cherry”.

    8. When you found out what the real name actually was.

    9. When you never know what to expect from the first suck.

    10. When you think you’ve found the perfect agbalumo, but then you see maggots inside.

    11. When what you tasted wasn’t what you ended up buying.

    12. A risk you should never take:

  • 10 Times Nigerians Had Serious Trust Issues

    10 Times Nigerians Had Serious Trust Issues

    1. When NEPA brings light and your neighbors don’t put off the generator.

    Can’t trust NEPA to have sense!

    2. When your tailor says he has sewn your cloth, but you still go to his shop to see with your own eyes.

    Because Nigerian tailors and disappointment are siblings!

    3. When people stand with the fuel attendant so they can see how the petrol is entering the car.

    Before they give you 1k fuel and collect 10k!

    4. When you tell a kid to go and wear his shoe, and he says he’ll follow you barefoot.

    Ahn ahn! this kid can’t even trust at this small age!

    5. When your mum doesn’t let the mallam cut the chicken in the market so they won’t take their own share.

    She will now leave you to do the wahala at home.

    6. When people collect money at the ATM, and start counting it!

    YOU PEOPLE ARE DAMAGED!

    7. When you want to make a deposit, and the bank cashier counts it like 100 times!

    Oga, do I look like a 419 person to you?

    8. When people now add stew to their jollof.

    Why can’t you trust the power of jollof?

    9. When your boyfriend calls and you tell him you’re with your friend.

    Who broke this one’s heart like this?

    10. When you’re buying buka food and you chook your eyes to count the spoons of rice they’re putting.

    Every grain must be complete!