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single to stupor | Zikoko!
  • The Zikoko Guide to Helping Your Single Friend Survive Valentine’s Day

    The Zikoko Guide to Helping Your Single Friend Survive Valentine’s Day

    Being the single friend sucks. If you’re not constantly feeling like the third wheel, you’re having to listen to your friend rant about their boo, knowing fully well they’ll never take any advice you give.

    Valentine is coming, and if you’re the relationship friend, know that it’ll be the most third-wheel type of day ever for your single friend. But you can help make it better.

    Get them a gift

    Send them money, finally take their advice or buy them something they need; the gift options are endless. The point is to remind them of your love and make sure they don’t feel left out.

    Now’s not the time to match-make them

    I know you want the best for them, but talking stages are stressful as hell. So give them a break on Valentine’s Day. They can continue answering what their favourite colour is in March.

    Break up with your partner

    Hear me out. Nothing screams sacrifice like sacrificing your own relationship so your bestie doesn’t feel alone. At least, then you can spend the day together, discussing how the other gender is scum.

    Or just abandon them for a day

    You can also just ghost your partner to spend time with your friend on Valentine’s Day. You know how people say, “Every day should be Valentine with the right person”? Well, if they’re Mr/Miss Right, they wouldn’t mind picking any of the other days in the calendar to do Valentine things.

    Get them to set their priorities straight

    Not every time love matter. Are they keeping to their New Year resolutions? Or have they forgotten them? Those are more important than plastic flowers and Nigerian-made teddy bears, if you ask me. It doesn’t matter that you yourself are doing love things with your own partner. The focus is your friend.

    Join them to make fun of other people’s gifts

    There’s always more than enough cringe-worthy content on Valentine’s Day and who better to join in judging people than your bestie? They might judge your gifts too, but TBH, someone has to do it. With you being blind from love and all.

    Allow them enter your relationship

    Don’t you want your bestie to enjoy happiness too? Your partner might still cheat one day. But this way, you get to see and approve who they cheat with.


    NEXT READ: 7 Perfect Galentine’s Day Gifts for Your Long-Distance Bestie


    Psst! Have you seen our Valentine Special yet? We brought back three couples – one now with kids, one now married and the last, still best friends – to share how their relationships have evolved in the last five years. Watch the first episode below:


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  • 8 Ways to Rock Your Matching Pyjamas Alone This Year

    8 Ways to Rock Your Matching Pyjamas Alone This Year

    It’s matching pyjamas season; the final hurdle of “God when” us singles need to cross. But fear not. We’ve come up with tips on how you can bypass this holiday tension.

    1. Hope for the best

    It’s three days until Christmas. Time is still on your side. Call that dispatch rider to deliver the pyjamas to your crush. It may end in disgrace, or they could show up at your doorstep. Just try.

    2. Wear the two at once

    This weather for two is another excuse to get cozy. So wear both of them. Who will know?

    3. Twin with your mother

    As long as there’s matching going on, you’re all good. What better way to end the year than a photoshoot with the person that loves you unconditionally?

    4. Get your dad involved

    If mummy abandons you on this journey, a father’s love is just as sweet to display online. You can also call him to fight the crush that abandoned you. Either way, you win.

    5. Stand in front of a mirror

    Self-love is the real game changer. Your reflection is all you need to pull that pyjamas off. Just stand there, look cute and take a mirror selfie.

    6. Plan a group photoshoot

    Na single you single, you no kill person. Invite your boys or girls, or just pick random people off the street. Post it and insert a deep quote on the value of friendship and it’s a wrap.

    7. Just end everything

    We’re not endorsing violence. But if all else fails, you have to end this trend once and for all. Burn your own first since it didn’t work out. Then ask any couple you see in matching pyjamas to remove it immediately and burn it. 

    8. Give up

    There’s only so much you can do honestly. We’ll try again next year.

  • QUIZ: If You Do 10/20 Of These Things On A First Date, You Deserve To Remain Single

    QUIZ: If You Do 10/20 Of These Things On A First Date, You Deserve To Remain Single

    You should be cultured on any date, talk more of a first date. Just know you don’t deserve to go on another date if you do these things.

    Select all the things you do on a first date:

  • QUIZ: If You Know 10/15 Of These Songs, You’re Single To Stupor

    QUIZ: If You Know 10/15 Of These Songs, You’re Single To Stupor

    Has anyone ever told you that the songs you know could determine your singleness? Well, we’re telling you now.

    Take the quiz:

    Select all the songs you know:

  • QUIZ: If You Get 9/21 On This Quiz, You’re Single To Stupor

    QUIZ: If You Get 9/21 On This Quiz, You’re Single To Stupor

    There is being single, and there is being single to stupor. If up to 9 things here apply to you, you’re definitely the latter.

    Select all that apply to you:

  • 19 Hilarious Tweets From The ‘Single Life In 3 Words’ Hashtag

    19 Hilarious Tweets From The ‘Single Life In 3 Words’ Hashtag

    Don’t you just hate it when people in relationships make everything look all cute and mushy? Singletons on Twitter have described how the single life is treating them, in 3 words.

    Check out these tweets from #SingleLifeIn3Words:

    1. When Jesus has your heart.

    https://twitter.com/tianDperkins/status/698099384597106688?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

    2. When you are single but your mother is ready to wear aso ebi.

    3. This one about takeaway.

    https://twitter.com/EdenAdore/status/698097142255247360

    4. People who love their personal space.

    5. The single life isn’t very rosy for some.

    6. Single life = Stress-free life.

    7. When you have to choose between relationships and having money.

    https://twitter.com/arsenalkings/status/698077980418031616

    8. This brillant ad.

    9. This blessed truth.

    10. When you have no bae to go through your phone.

    11. But some just have it all.

    https://twitter.com/daybono/status/698104342025469952

    12. This sad tweet… Awww!

    13. Some just love their phones too much.

    https://twitter.com/iam_NuelIII/status/698114051902148608

    14. Netflix will always be loyal.

    15. For those that detest drama.

    16. This one about selfies.

    17. And minding your business.

    18. Some are winning at life.

    https://twitter.com/kenn_mainah/status/698142742799654912

    19. This person is not at all enjoying the single life.

    https://twitter.com/KeyaAshley/status/698145661674336256