Single ladies | Zikoko!

Some people enjoy being in relationships while others enjoy being single. I asked Nigerian women the best thing about being single. Here’s what they had to say.

Jay, 20

It is nice that I am single right now because I don’t have to overthink anything. If I was in a relationship, any little mood swing from my partner would be a cause for alarm. For me, being in a relationship for me is a distraction. I became more focused on my work and school after I left my last relationship. Also, it has helped me save money. I liked spending on my partners so I’m glad I am alone right now.

Funmi, 22

Being single gives you the opportunity to pursue your dreams without reservations. It allows you to find your purpose. When you have a partner, you have to consider their feelings in your endeavours and if you are not resolute enough, you might lose your sense of identity.

Tobs, 27

For me, it is getting to know myself and enjoying my own company. For someone who is still unlearning prioritising the male gaze and centring my life around romantic relationships, this is a breath of fresh air. It is hard — I get lonely and cry but ultimately, I’m loving being on my own. It is also nice not to have to spend your money on anyone but yourself, your friends and your family.

Plus I can sleep with anyone I want. I don’t enjoy sex with people I don’t have feelings for but it’s nice to be able to say fuck it, I’ll have sex with this person and not feel guilty because you’re cheating — I hate cheating. The dating pool isn’t that great, so I’d rather be on my own if there’s no value being added to my life.

Ose, 20

Being single is less of a burden for me. It’s harder to keep up with someone else on bad days. There is no extra responsibility when you are alone. Also, I can tell those monitoring spirits that keep asking when I am getting married that I am single and know I am not lying about it.

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Tosin, 24

I’ve been single for as long as forever, and it’s my choice.I don’t feel anyone should rush into anything until they are ready, mentally, emotionally, and physically. For me the best thing about being single is the freedom — I don’t have to answer to anybody for talking to someone else. I am my own person and I make my own decisions without having to make certain sacrifices for any significant other. It allows me to take adequate care of myself.

[donation
1. Your parents keep asking about your prospects.

I can’t tell the future, sir.

2. Or worrying if you’d still be able to have kids.

Will my ovaries just dry up?

3. Or insisting you’re getting too old.

…even though you’re like thirty!

4. Your aunties trying to set you up with their friends’ doctor son.

But I don’t know him now!

5. All your friends think they can solve your singleness.

Thanks, but no thanks.

6. Twitter says you’re “too opinionated”, so you won’t find a Nigerian man to marry you.

Your brain. Where is it?

7. “Don’t get a PhD degree, men don’t like over-smart women”.

You don’t say!

8. Guys with nothing to offer approaching because they think you’ll be desperate enough to accept.

God, See my life!

9. People asking why you broke up with your last boyfriend.

I was self sabotaging. Okay?

10. People asking what you feel if your younger sister gets married before you.

More power to her!>

11. Then they say “You’re so nice, I wonder why you’re still single”.

Err..because I am!

12. Your parents asking you to stop looking for love and just marry someone.

And you’re here thinking “Am I that sad?”=

13. You’re always the third, fifth and seventh wheel.

Come along, they said. It’ll be fun, they said.

14. And the designated photographer of your happy couple friends.

Stop. Smiling. I can’t else they’d say I’m bitter.

15. No one understands that you just want to be single right now.

I mean, it’s a choice…

16. Everyone keeps saying, “You’ll soon find someone”.

Yeah, sure.

17. Or that you have to love yourself before someone can love you.

Go on, please!

18. You’re secretly excited when your friends break up.

Oh I’m so sorry you guys broke up..LOL!

19. Or when their spouses don’t show up for events.

“Who needs them anyway? We’ll still have fun without them.”

20. Catching up with old friends always means awkwardly answering the “So, are you seeing anyone?” question.

No. But I still have me.

21. You’re a master at having crushes

But a relationship novice.

22. People tiptoe around you when relationships topics come up.

Jeez! I won’t break down in tears.

23. If there’s an event you want to go to, you have to decide if you want to go badly enough that it’s worth going alone because of all the questions above.

But it really isn’t. “I immediately regret this decision” – You say to yourself, after you go.

24. Especially weddings.

No.>

25. Or Valentine’s day.

NO!

26. You blush every time Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” comes on.

Too close to home.

27. Even you start to wonder if you’re going to be forever alone.

Cats?

28. But then you realize that you’re loving the single life.

Because let’s face it, relationships aren’t that great.
Psst! Guys and gentlemen over here. A guy just showed you how to get that lady’s phone number! And it’s quite simple actually.
This is Topo Ngidi, a lovely lady from Botswana.

A guy tried to get her number, you know, the way guys like to do.

And she said no.

What’s the guy to do?

Certainly something creative, just like this guy.

https://twitter.com/MissNgidi/status/708396935217074177

How many of you can do this?

He even does something more impressive. At least for her.

https://twitter.com/MissNgidi/status/708397864255397890

Of course, the people of Twitter had things to say.

He must be a player.

https://twitter.com/ThatDeborahGirl/status/709269400256430080

It was an opportunity for her to make some easy cash.

@MissNgidi & you haven’t sold it? That’s easy cash. You biting or nah? pic.twitter.com/TouSGBxbHH
— ¥eezus (@Yaya_Onfire) March 12, 2016
Or is a potential stalker.

https://twitter.com/TheVixenPixie/status/708675898531299328

Some were morbid.

@MissNgidi *plot twist* what if he reports it as stolen
— gOrgeOusTK (@Just_Thikheyi) March 12, 2016
According to one, he wants her goodies.

@MissNgidi I know a lady who almost got raped by a phone donor. If u don’t plan 2 have sex with him, post his phone back ASAP & avoid him.
— Olusola Adio (@solaadio) March 12, 2016
His creativity was admired.

@MissNgidi now that’s how to get a girl to wait for your call, love that
— snapchat : temmitats (@_Temilorun) March 12, 2016
He could be Nigerian.

@missngidi i’m sure he is nigerian.
— 4eyez (@jerrytaen) March 12, 2016
Or he could be the potential bae.

@MissNgidi Please, take his call. He might be the one.
— Adé táyọ̀ (@Tayo_Mr) March 12, 2016
So she was advised to pick up.

@MissNgidi all these hungry people saying sell it. Smh.
He is a smart man & a go-getter. Go on one date. It may be worth your while. — ° (@Evie__Frye) March 12, 2016
Some offered what they had.

https://twitter.com/BurnaboyPh/status/708590055191871488

Some beileved that she was lying.

@MissNgidi pic.twitter.com/iECcrYTApq
— BAFFOUR_ (@BygBadTyga) March 13, 2016
But even if she was or it actually happened, goals have been set.
[zkk_poll post=23376 poll=content_block_standard_format_20]
So a lady went with her friend to Four Points by Sheratonon Valentine’s Day and they were not allowed to visit the bar.
Read her story.
https://twitter.com/FireOFola/status/698933031487328256

https://twitter.com/FireOFola/status/698934406195646468

https://twitter.com/FireOFola/status/698935424434245632

https://twitter.com/FireOFola/status/698936168046587905

https://twitter.com/FireOFola/status/698937113170018304

https://twitter.com/FireOFola/status/698938038974550017

https://twitter.com/FireOFola/status/698938356806320128

This led to another lady sharing a similar experience she had.

https://twitter.com/Goziecoker/status/698976968969158656

https://twitter.com/Goziecoker/status/698965611804803072

https://twitter.com/Goziecoker/status/698965916592304128

https://twitter.com/Goziecoker/status/698965916592304128

https://twitter.com/Goziecoker/status/698967434871619586

https://twitter.com/Goziecoker/status/698966371858776064
[zkk_poll post=18658 poll=content_block_standard_format_14]
We have given you a list of white people doing their thing with Nigerian songs. If you missed that, please catch up here.

But what you might not have seen is a comprehensive list of Nigerians putting the home flavor in some chart-topping foreign songs. These videos are unapologetically Nigerian and they broke a few records.

Are you familiar with the Naija Boys? No? Then, let me help you.

They’re one of the best music spoof artistes and they have been at it since 2007. They’ve even been endorsed by Coca Cola!

1. Chop Igbati – Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball

This video has almost a million views!

2. 7/11 – Beyonce

This video was a Coca cola ad.

3. Lollipop – Lil Wayne

This was probably the song that moved them to the mainstream.

4. Black and Yellow – Wiz Khalifa

No words!

5. Single Ladies – Beyonce

If you like it, put African bling on it. Because you know how Africans are obsessed with marriage.

6. Kiss Kiss – Chris Brown and T-Pain

This video from 3:00

7. Crank That – Soulja Boy

Crank that Naija boy. No seriously, crank that Naija boy!

Stop thinking about your data. It’s too late now ^_^.

Image and video credit: Naija Boys.

Jay, 20

Funmi, 22

Tobs, 27

Ose, 20

Tosin, 24

1. Your parents keep asking about your prospects.

2. Or worrying if you’d still be able to have kids.

3. Or insisting you’re getting too old.

4. Your aunties trying to set you up with their friends’ doctor son.

5. All your friends think they can solve your singleness.

6. Twitter says you’re “too opinionated”, so you won’t find a Nigerian man to marry you.

7. “Don’t get a PhD degree, men don’t like over-smart women”.

8. Guys with nothing to offer approaching because they think you’ll be desperate enough to accept.

9. People asking why you broke up with your last boyfriend.

10. People asking what you feel if your younger sister gets married before you.

11. Then they say “You’re so nice, I wonder why you’re still single”.

12. Your parents asking you to stop looking for love and just marry someone.

13. You’re always the third, fifth and seventh wheel.

14. And the designated photographer of your happy couple friends.

15. No one understands that you just want to be single right now.

16. Everyone keeps saying, “You’ll soon find someone”.

17. Or that you have to love yourself before someone can love you.

18. You’re secretly excited when your friends break up.

19. Or when their spouses don’t show up for events.

20. Catching up with old friends always means awkwardly answering the “So, are you seeing anyone?” question.

21. You’re a master at having crushes

22. People tiptoe around you when relationships topics come up.

23. If there’s an event you want to go to, you have to decide if you want to go badly enough that it’s worth going alone because of all the questions above.

24. Especially weddings.

25. Or Valentine’s day.

26. You blush every time Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” comes on.

27. Even you start to wonder if you’re going to be forever alone.

28. But then you realize that you’re loving the single life.

This is Topo Ngidi, a lovely lady from Botswana.

A guy tried to get her number, you know, the way guys like to do.

And she said no.

What’s the guy to do?

Certainly something creative, just like this guy.

How many of you can do this?

He even does something more impressive. At least for her.

Of course, the people of Twitter had things to say.

He must be a player.

It was an opportunity for her to make some easy cash.

Or is a potential stalker.

Some were morbid.

According to one, he wants her goodies.

His creativity was admired.

He could be Nigerian.

Or he could be the potential bae.

So she was advised to pick up.

Some offered what they had.

Some beileved that she was lying.

But even if she was or it actually happened, goals have been set.

So a lady went with her friend to Four Points by Sheratonon Valentine’s Day and they were not allowed to visit the bar.

This led to another lady sharing a similar experience she had.

1. Chop Igbati – Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball

2. 7/11 – Beyonce

3. Lollipop – Lil Wayne

4. Black and Yellow – Wiz Khalifa

5. Single Ladies – Beyonce

6. Kiss Kiss – Chris Brown and T-Pain

7. Crank That – Soulja Boy