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responses | Zikoko!
  • 11 Perfect Responses For The Dreaded “WYD?” Question

    There’s always that one person in your DM who sucks at conversations and always goes “Wyd?”, especially at odd hours of the day. Did we lie? You might have even blocked one or two of such people, because which one is “What are you doing?” by 12 a.m.?

    If you want to bother with a response the next time this happens, try the following:

    1. “Picking beans”

    “But make it, “Picking out the stones to cook and throwing the actual beans away. Ask them if they’d like a plate when it’s done, smh.

    2. “Counting the sky”

    By the time they try to figure out how many skies are there, you’ve blocked them.

    3. “Plotting your downfall”

    Since it seems your village people sent them to be a nuisance in your DM.

    4. “Avoiding you”

    For obvious reasons. Period.

    5. “Minding my business”

    If you’re feeling extra spicy, add that you highly recommend they do same.

    6. “Sleeping”

    If they ask how you can be sleeping and chatting at the same time, ask them if it’s their sleep. Tch.

    7. “Mopping the ocean”

    Yes, tell them it is your favourite pastime.

    8. “Sending your number and location to kidnappers”

    That should send a loud and clear message not to ask you JAMB question.

    9. “Things”

    The vaguer the better. Even if you’re doing nothing, and bored out of your mind.

    10. “Wyd?”

    This is a psychology trick of reflection. So, by returning their question, it may hit them how annoying it is.

    11. “Damtkoqa

    Meaning, “Don’t ask me this kind of question again.” But leave them to figure out what the acronym means.

  • 18 Hilarious Responses Nigerian Parents Have For Every Situation

    1. When you ask your mother where she put something.

    2. When you ask them what course you should study in the university.

    3. When you ask your mother why she’s shouting.

    4. When you ask your mother where you should place something.

    5. When you ask your parents if you can go and visit your friends.

    6. When you ask them why you cannot watch Harry Potter.

    7. When you ask them if your friends can come and visit.

    8. When you ask your mum why you have to eat rice every Sunday.

    9. When you ask your dad for money.

    10. When you ask your mother why you can’t eat at your friend’s house.

    11. When you ask your mom why you have to drink the annointing oil.

    12. When you come home with a bad result.

    13. When you tell your mother you’re not attending fellowship or vigil.

    14. When you ask your mum if you have to go to church on Sunday.

    15. When you ask your mum what she just said.

    16. When you score 98% on a test.

    17. When you ask your dad to increase your pocket money.

    18. When you ask your parents why you cannot have a Valentine.

  • 15 Of The Most Hilarious Nigerian Parent Responses You’ll Ever See

    1. When your mum is calling your sibling and you try to help.

    https://twitter.com/ms_hanie/status/712009407496916992

    2. When your father sees you doing anything that doesn’t relate to your education.

    https://twitter.com/sirDaccoh/status/681629451445243904

    3. When your mum takes everything literally.

    https://twitter.com/Khordeleah/status/679978719281319936

    4. When you bring one nonsense result home to your father.

    5. When your mother gives you that death stare.

    https://twitter.com/malik_pinmouth/status/629016278972370944

    6. When you try to be cool with your father,

    7. When your mother tells you to clean the house and you do rubbish,

    8. When you want to misbehave and your mother reminds you where you came from.

    https://twitter.com/SemilooreAkoni/status/698252563561447426

    9. When your mother expects you to be able to read her mind.

    10. When your mother jumps form 0 to 100 just like that.

    https://twitter.com/Oj_Philz/status/639551201130999808

    11. When your mother starts making you consider money ritual.

    https://twitter.com/Josh__IK/status/701155793593352192

    12. When you don’t get the best score humanly possible.

    https://twitter.com/ochman101/status/656143509087457280

    13. When you tell your mother you can’t find something.

    https://twitter.com/chuuzzy/status/576654410719318016

    14. When you ask your father for money.

    15. When you hear this song and you know it’s a fresh round of prayers.