1. You will not be told you’re travelling until the last minute.

I can’t have plans, abi?

2. They will wait till the tickets are at their most expensive before booking.

Then spend forever complaining.

3. You must not tell ANYBODY that you’re travelling.

Especially your relatives.

4. You become their house-help the night before the flight.

You will pack for Africa.

5. Their whole suitcase is for them. Half of your suitcase is also for them.

“My bag is full, help me put this thing in your bag.”

6. You are going to carry more food than clothes.

Especially stockfish.

7. Half of the things they’re making you pack are not even for your family.

Relatives and friends have hand inside that luggage.

8. They will make you dress like you’re going for a party.

Can I just wear shorts and be great?

9. You must go to the airport at least 4 hours before the departure time.

You will be at the airport longer than the plane sef.

10. They’re not paying anyone at the airport to help with all the bags, that’s why you are there.

Oya, carry them.

11. Excess luggage is their right and their’s alone.

Don’t even think of carrying extra unless you have the money.

12. You become the parent to all your other siblings.

STRESS!

13. They must start gisting with the first Nigerian family they meet there.

Ugh!