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Nigerians | Page 38 of 44 | Zikoko!
  • 14 Pictures Every Nigerian Who Hated Yoruba Class In School Will Get

    14 Pictures Every Nigerian Who Hated Yoruba Class In School Will Get

    1. THIS BOOK:

    The stress was real.

    2. You, halfway into every single Yoruba class:

    No time.

    3. When you see Yoruba class for double period on the timetable.

    Who did we offend?

    4. You, during Yoruba class pretending you understand what is happening.

    Can this period end?

    5. When the Yoruba teacher picks you to read a passage for the class.

    Hay God!

    6. When your Yoruba teacher tells you to translate a poem from English to Yoruba.

    Do you mean me well?

    7. When the invigilator gives you the question paper but you have already finished shading your obj sheet.

    The power of guessing.

    8. How the students who can’t speak Yoruba see the exam questions:

    What is this?

    9. When your teacher separates you from all your Yoruba friends.

    Is it fair?

    10. When someone asks for extra sheet during Yoruba exam.

    Who is this one?

    11. When you just write Yoruba song lyrics for your essay and submit.

    “Gongo Aso kutupu awu…”

    12. You, mixing Yoruba and English during your exam like:

    I’ve tried, abeg.

    13. When you managed to know the Yoruba word, but you still fail because of wrong intonation marks.

    Are you not evil?

    14. You, after every Yoruba exam:

    You already know you have banged.
  • You Won’t Believe These Amazing Pictures Are From The Abuja-Kaduna Rail

    You Won’t Believe These Amazing Pictures Are From The Abuja-Kaduna Rail
    When we heard the Abuja-Kaduna rail was completed, we didn’t expect too much. However, these pictures shared by Twitter user, @Jag_bros show just how amazing the coaches are.

    On June 2, transport minister, Rotimi Amaechi, announced the rail was open for test-run.

    The best part is passengers get to ride the trains for free until President Buhari inaugurates the project in July.

    However, Nigerians won’t have to pay through their noses to ride in these coaches because Rotimi Amaechi stated that the fares will be subsidised.

    Now, people can travel between Abuja and Kaduna in the coolest coaches we’ve ever seen.

    We can’t wait to see more rails like this across the country and hope they are all properly maintained.

  • Looks Like We’ve Found The Kindest Professor Ever!

    Looks Like We’ve Found The Kindest Professor Ever!
    Almost everyone can relate to how strict our lecturers and professors can be sometimes. But Twitter user, @Nnenna shared pictures that prove otherwise.

    She shared pictures of this professor of a university in Cote D’Ivoire backing a child with a wrapper.

    According to her, the thoughtful lecturer decided to help one of his students look after her crying baby so she could concentrate on her exams.

    He’s basically the kindest professor we’ve seen because…

    When you bring your child to an exam hall, Nigerian lecturers be like…

    How they look at you when your child starts crying.

    You can’t even beg them to help hold your child when they’ve not finished holding your CGPA for you.

    We hope this child’s mother aces her paper after her professor went an extra mile to help her focus.

    [zkk_poll post=38539 poll=content_block_standard_format_8]
  • A Nigerian Comedian Shamed Black Girls But We Won’t Take It

    A Nigerian Comedian Shamed Black Girls But We Won’t Take It
    A Nigerian comedian in the UK, MC Klinton Cod, shared the most ridiculous video on his Snapchat, mocking black girls.

    In the video, Kinton Cod asked one of his friends what he thought about black girls, and the reply was ‘Fuck black girls’.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BHH71AzAmrA/?taken-

    What made the video even more distasteful was how hard he laughed and the white woman in the video, mouthing the words ‘Fuck black girls’.

    Despite the fact that nobody really knows this so-called comedian, this ridiculous video was met with heavy criticism.

    He went on to apologise for the video, claiming the comments in the video aren’t his sincere opinions.

    Who apology don epp? It simply shows the disrespectful things people would do just for attention.

    Isn’t it better to be silent than sharing an ‘insincere comment’ that doesn’t even make sense?

    Considering history, saying sorry won’t change the fact that he shamed black women and even encouraged a white woman to do so.

    Maybe someone should spell it out to Nigerian comedians that they can be funny without necessarily making sexist jokes.

  • 17 Pictures That’ll Make Sense To Nigerians Who Are Obsessed With Selfies

    17 Pictures That’ll Make Sense To Nigerians Who Are Obsessed With Selfies

    1. You, never missing an opportunity to take a selfie:

    Even in the middle of a life crisis, you’re there taking selfies.

    2. You, spending ‘quality time’ with your friends.

    “I have to capture the moment.”

    3. You, whenever you see anything that resembles a camera or phone:

    Time to slay.

    4. How you feel when you look great but don’t have a phone to take a selfie.

    What is life at this point?

    5. When you ask for your friend’s phone and return it full of your selfies.

    Have to take a selfie by all means necessary abeg.

    6. What you look for in a phone:

    What else matters?

    7. What your camera roll looks like:

    For the love of selfies.

    8. When you’ve taken a million selfies and finally find the right one.

    Too lit!

    9. How you feel after you’ve mastered the art of selfie taking.

    BOSS!

    10. How you take selfies when you want your whole outfit to show.

    Cannot come and be wasting kacks.

    11. You, when your friends decide to do ‘silly faces’ in pictures, but pouting is your signature pose.

    You people are on your own.

    12. You staying camera ready at all times.

    Gats be prepared.

    13. You, posting every great selfie you take so they don’t go to waste.

    Waste not, want not.

    14. How you impact ‘selfie wisdom’ to your friends:

    Na so.

    15. Your parents every time you take a selfie:

    Somebody cannot post ordinary selfie in peace again.

    16. When you finally drag them into your selfie obsession.

    A family that takes selfies together, stays together.

    17. How your friends look at you when you get excited that it’s National Selfie Day.

    Yes, there’s a National Selfie Day people. June 21st, get it right.

    Anyway sha, don’t mind the haters. Take awesome selfies with the 13MP front facing camera on the new Tecno Camon C9.

  • 14 Images Anyone Who Hates Spending Money Can Relate To

    14 Images Anyone Who Hates Spending Money Can Relate To

    1. When you buy something and you hear “oga make I keep the change”

    Don’t let the devil use you.

    2. When someone invites you to go and eat but says “bring your wallet”

    Thanks. I’m not hungry.

    3. “The Aso Ebi will be N35,000 and N9,000 for gele”

    I think I have something similar at home.

    4. When it is time to buy Christmas gifts for people

    I don’t really celebrate Christmas like that.

    5. When you walk into a shop but the prices are not smiling

    “Do you have the golden reddish brown color?”

    6. When your friends ask you when next you are going to the club

    I always have malaria every friday night please.

    7. When you get asked why you are single

    Relationships are expensive abeg.

    8. When you are driving past Chicken Republic or KFC

    There is rice and new stew at home.

    9. What your phone charger looks like

    Because, it is still working.

    10. You, at any owambe now that tomato don cost

    Leave me o! Let me just do breakfast, lunch and supper here.

    11. When you see an indicator light on the dashboard of your car

    After I pray and anoint the car, it will be okay.

    12. How you feel when it’s time to pay your rent and bills at the same time

    My God, why?

    13. When you see an item you really want

    I still have one at home I am managing.

    14. When you hear the price for a show is N10,000 for a regular ticket

    I don’t think I will be able to make it.

  • Igwe 2Pac Is MaKing His ‘Amoshine’ Video Into A Song

    Igwe 2Pac Is MaKing His ‘Amoshine’ Video Into A Song

    Let’s admit it, this guy is great, no contest.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCffouk3BG8

    One quiet day, he shared a video to inspire us in his own way.

    https://twitter.com/KraksTV/status/739952034019827712

    And today, his Amoshine is now a movement….

    Because when the road gets rough…

    When the economy doesn’t want to be nice to you…

    And now he has hit the studio and will soon drop a video for Amoshine….

    https://twitter.com/KraksTV/status/745718690000273409

    And even if the song kuku has only one line…

    And his dab in the studio was just the worst…

    …Amoshine when Amoshine.

    We’re sha waiting to see the wonders he’ll perform when he releases the video.

  • 13 Glaring Signs You’re Actually An Amebo

    13 Glaring Signs You’re Actually An Amebo

    1. When people accuse you of being an Amebo…

    They’re not the same thing please.

    2. When you ask after someone’s boyfriend/girlfriend just to know if they’re still dating.

    Just to know if you should cross them out of your relationship goals.

    3. How you run to your window when you hear your neighbours arguing.

    Neighbour fights are the sweetest!

    4. You, adding mouth in random Danfo conversations.

    Even when they ask didn’t for your opinion.

    5. How you peek into people’s phones while they’re chatting in public.

    As per, you’re sharing the phone with them.

    6. Nothing irritates you more than this…

    The people with public accounts don’t kuku have two heads.

    7. You don’t mind famzing that annoying person that always has all the gist.

    Carrying last is not your portion.

    8. When you find yourself in 2004 on your crush’s Facebook wall.

    How else are you supposed to know  what they had for breakfast in JSS 2?

    9. You, acting surprised when someone is giving you gist you heard weeks ago.

    “Are you serious?”

    10. How you feel when someone is talking while you’re trying to tap gist.

    Shut up abeg.

    11. You, viewing people’s Snapchat stories but never posting yours.

    So you can do advanced amebo.

    12. You know all the names and secrets of all your followers.

    As per, you people are now BFFs.

    13. How you feel when you find out some people use different usernames for their Instagram or Facebook.

    Why are these people childish?
  • Winning! Beast Of No Nation Star, Abraham Attah Has Been Cast In The New Spiderman Movie

    Winning! Beast Of No Nation Star, Abraham Attah Has Been Cast In The New Spiderman Movie

    Abraham Attah, the young actor that captured our hearts with his role as Agu in Beasts of No Nation is going big in Hollywood.

    His amateur but equally award-winning performance has not only earned him awards…

    But also a spot in the cast of the forthcoming Spiderman movie!

    Although his role is yet to be announced, he’ll be joining actors like Zendaya, Tom Holland and Micheal Keaton.

    He is also set to star in a drama film, The Modern Ocean, which also includes Daniel Radcliffe, Keanu Reeves and Anne Hathaway.

    The Spiderman movie is obviously going to be lit! Abraham is only going to greater places and we hope he wins an Oscar soon!

  • Aisha Buhari Dragged Ayo Fayose All Over Twitter But Haters Will Say Her Account Was Hacked

    Aisha Buhari Dragged Ayo Fayose All Over Twitter But Haters Will Say Her Account Was Hacked
    The mother of internet fights that shook  Nigerian twitter by its roots happened and it couldn’t be more shocking. Unfortunately, it wasn’t over pounded yam or paying bills.

    The First Lady of Nigeria, Aisha Buhari, dragged infamous governor, Ayo Fayose, all over the streets of Twitter because he accused her of being involved in the Haliburton scandal.

    Mummy Aisha, someone can’t play with you again?

    On June 21, the governor’s Zenith account was blocked as part of an EFCC investigation. And instead of licking his wounds, he came on Twitter to throw the first punch.

    However, she wasn’t having it and fired back, calling him an ‘unchained mad dog’.

    And said she was ready for him and even threw shade at her husband, a whole Commander-In-Chief of the Armed Forces.

    Mama oh! Who knew she had Twitter fingers in her? We never ‘hexperred it’.

    Even though haters will say her account was hacked, we now know Aisha Buhari is really Nigerian on the inside.

    Perhaps, she has finally joined bad gang.

    Somebody needs to come and explain to us sha.

    https://twitter.com/femiTRIPP/status/745359745830293505

    Because even Uncle Reno didn’t see that clapback coming.

    Everyone knows how Uncle Fayose doesn’t have respect for anybody but now, he has finally met his match!

    And maybe we can all agree that all of us in this country need to take classes in home training!

  • 10 Times Duro Arts Trolled Everybody With His Bun And Belly Collection

    10 Times Duro Arts Trolled Everybody With His  Bun And Belly Collection
    Durotimi Bolaji-Idowu who works under the name, Duro Arts, is known for his caricature-style designs. He has even worked for artistes like Snoop Dogg, Davido and brands like MTVbaseAfrica. Here are some of the times he trolled us with his Bun and Belly art collection.

    1. When he trolled Wizkid’s ‘controversial’ picture.

    2. And he basically pulled a Daenerys Targaryen.

    3. When he trolled this pre-wedding picture.

    4. But really, what does ‘Bahd, Baddo, Baddest’ mean?

    5. When he helped Beyonce wash her back.

    6. His attempt at wearing a cropped top.

    7. When he had something to say about Toolz’s wedding dress.

    8. When he played with Lupita’s shuku.

    9. When he wanted to use style to get on Davido’s flight.

    10. When he trolled Darth Vader.

    Featured image credit: Duro Arts
  • 17 Things You’ll Understand If You Ever Had Nigerians On Your Flight

    17 Things You’ll Understand If You Ever Had Nigerians On Your Flight

    1. When the flight is full and you all start fighting to get on the plane first.

    I must enter please.

    2. When you enter the plane and the smell of fish hits you.

    Don’t they sell fish where you people are going?

    3. Nigerians, when the pilot announces that the flight will take off late:

    Lol, but you will still wait now?

    4. When someone with 6 carry-on bags won’t let you put your own bag in the overhead cabin.

    How did you not check those in?

    5. When you see your country people taking selfies in the first class compartment then going to sit in the economy class they paid for.

    Welcome.

    6. When the Nigerian flight attendants starts talking in an accent from a completely different planet.

    “Hartenshorn pliz, deezis a bordin hannounzmen for Earo Contractor flai 364 tew Laygorz…”

    7. Having Nigerians on a flight and hearing “Do you know who I am?” at least once:

    Unfailingly.

    8. When someone leads a plane-wide prayer session before take off.

    Here too?!

    9. When they say put off your phone but there is still that one ‘businessman’ that is still making a call.

    Don’t kill all of us please.

    10. There will always be those people arguing about football or politics at the back of the plane.

    No one cares!

    11. When they tell a plane full of Nigerians to put off the lights during a night flight.

    We are not children of darkness.

    12. When the plane hits a little turbulence.

    “Blood of Jesus!!!”

    13. ​Nigerians and waiting for the seatbelt sign to go off before removing their seatbelts:

    You people should let us finish landing now!

    14. When the plane lands safely and as Nigerians, you cannot help but clap.

    YASSS!

    15. Pilot: “Please remain seated until the plane stops mov-“. Nigerians:

    No time.

    16. When the plane lands and everyone is running to the baggage claim/immigration place.

    We cannot come and queue forever.

    17. Nigerians when it’s time to get their luggage from the overhead cabin:

    They don’t even mind climbing over your head.
  • 15 Things Nigerian Muslims Are Definitely Tired Of Hearing

    15 Things Nigerian Muslims Are Definitely Tired Of Hearing

    1. “You don’t look like a Muslim”

    Oshay spotter of genuine Muslims.

    2. “You’re not like those Muslims, you’re different?”

    Let’s have some sense please.

    3. “Why haven’t you people tried to stop Boko Haram”

    Okay, wait let me call them on my phone.

    4. “You look hungry, can’t you just skip a day during Ramadan?”

    Is it your hunger?

    5. “Don’t you feel somehow being a Muslim”

    Your face is somehow.

    6. “You’re too fine to be Muslim”

    So all Muslims are ugly?

    7. “All of you are kuku terrorists”

    Clap for yourself.

    8. “Your beard makes you look like a Boko Haram terrorist”

    Okay, I can steal your girl sha.

    9. “Pork is sweet, you should try it”

    Really bruhh?

    10. “Do you shower with your hijab”

    Yes na, I glued it to my head.

    11. “When is your Christmas?”

    When did they make Christmas a double holiday?

    12. “Muslims want to take over Nigeria with Islamic Banking”

    Your olodo is showing sha.

    13. “Igbo/Yoruba people aren’t real Muslims”

    Are you serious?

    14. “What’s your English name?”

    When did that become a thing?

    15. “When will you go to Mecca and buy Jalabiya for me?”

    Are you going to pay for my ticket though?
  • Mayowa Nicholas Is The First Nigerian To Ever Feature In A Dolce & Gabbana Campaign

    Mayowa Nicholas Is The First Nigerian To Ever Feature In A Dolce & Gabbana Campaign

    Mayowa Nicholas, who was the female winner of  Elite Model Look Nigeria in 2014 has shown that the only way for her is up.

    She became the first Nigerian model to be featured in a Dolce & Gabbana campaign when she appeared in their Fall/Winter 2016 campaign shoot.

    Sharing pictures of the campaign which was shot in Italy on her Instagram, Mayowa worked alongside models like Cong He and Sasha Kingina.

    After becoming the female winner of the Elite Model Look in 2014, Mayowa went on to be a top finalist in the world finals in China.

    Since then, she has walked for international designers like Hermes, Balmain, Calvin Klein and Kenzo. And in 2016, she was named as one of the 15 New Faces That Ruled Fall 2016 alongside Kendall Jenner and Irina Shayk.

    Here’s wishing Mayowa many more years of fierce slayage on the runway! We’re proud of her and hope she keeps the good work up.

    You can check more pictures from the campaign here. Featured image credit : Fashion Times
  • Nothing New, Just K.Michelle And Her Ridiculous Attempt At Speaking Pidgin English

    Nothing New, Just K.Michelle And Her Ridiculous Attempt At Speaking Pidgin English

    We get it, Nigerian culture is the new cool. Our music is even being jammed to across the world.

    Musicians like K-Michelle even featured in a remix of a Nigerian classic song, nice!

    But this same Aunty K. Michelle tried to speak “Nigerian” in the most ridiculous manner.

    She shared this video on her Instagram page and claimed she was only speaking Nigerian Pidgin English.

    And when Nigerians started dragging her…

    … She went and posted more videos. Oh dear!

    As if that first one wasn’t enough torture, she went on to throw shade at African-Americans in her next video.

    She said “I am not African-American, I am just African. Because African-Americans too  busy getting worried about ‘tea’ and getting no bread. Wetin dey happen? How far?”

    And she ended the drama while speaking at the top of her voice with a shout-out to Nigerian-American rapper, Wale.

    “Look at me, I’m ‘oh-ga’ at the top. Look at you, mumu, just gossiping, blogging and suffering. Look at you, shine your eyes”.

    What exactly was she trying to say in those videos?

    Because they were just ridiculous and confusing.

    Who told her the only way to speak pidgin English was by speaking so loudly?

    Who was she even calling ‘mumu’ in the video?

    When African-Americans try to ‘speak in an African accent’ but fail woefully…

    Can you not?

    If she was trying to win us over with those videos, we’re so not impressed!

    Watch the rest of the videos on her Instagram page, @Kmichellemusic.
  • There’s A Chinese Supermarket In Abuja But Nigerians Aren’t Really Welcome There

    There’s A Chinese Supermarket In Abuja But Nigerians Aren’t Really Welcome There
    Nothing can be more shocking than discovering that the management of a Chinese supermarket has allegedly refused entry to Nigerians in groups, except when escorted by a police officer due to their alleged criminal activities.

    According to the DailyTrust, this decision was reached after the supermarket was attacked by armed robbers who stole over 2.5 million Naira, leaving the owners injured.

    Although the sign above says everyone is welcome to the store, an attendant who spoke with DailyTrust, explained that the alleged decision to bar Nigerians wasn’t discriminatory but a safety procedure to prevent recurrence of such activities.

    The attendant however said Nigerians are allowed to enter the supermarket individually and not in groups except accompanied by a policeman.

    In a now deleted post, Facebook user, Mohammad Jamu, claimed to have gone to the supermarket and was well-received only that people had to go in one at a time because of the robbery incident.

    But wait a minute…

    It’s not rocket science to know that there are several ways to improve security in any organisation than making only Nigerians go into the supermarket one at a time.

    This development also points out the flaws in the Nigerian security situation and the risks Nigerians and foreigners are regularly exposed to.

    However, the Nigerian police has to make efforts to curb criminal activities all over the country immediately.

    This post as updated on June 16, 2016, includes the alleged account of the Facebook shopper, Mohammad Jamu, who went to check out the supermarket.
  • One Of Chimamanda’s Short Stories Is Being Adapted Into A Film And We’re So Here For It!

    One Of Chimamanda’s Short Stories Is Being Adapted Into A Film And We’re So Here For It!
    Some of the best movies ever made are the ones that were adapted from novels.

    And because Chimamanda’s greatness must never be overlooked, her award-winning novel, Half Of A Yellow Sun, was made into a film produced by Biyi Bandele.

    And in seriously awesome news, Chimamanda has signed the film adaptation rights of a short story from her award-winning collection, The Thing Around Your Neck, to Ghanaian director, Adoma Akosua Owusu.

    The short story, On Monday Of Last Week, reveals the experience of a Nigerian immigrant, Kamara, and her interest in the mother of the boy she babysits.

    Scheduled to play Kamara’s role is Chinasa Ogbuagu, who recently featured in Off-Broadway Nigerian-themed play, Sojourners.

    Akosua Owusu who fell in love with the story because it addresses issues like race, self-awareness and liberalism has launched a Kickstarter campaign to help fund the project.

    We’re so excited and can’t wait to see how great this movie will turn out!

    To help towards making the production of this film possible, check out the Kickstarter campaign video here.
  • A UI Designer Wants The World To Know About Invisible People Of The North

    A UI Designer Wants The World To Know About Invisible People Of The North
    When people who love to travel return from their journeys, they come with souvenirs and stories of their experiences and the people they met.

    Telling the Al-Majiri story with pictures is Kolapo Oladapo, a UI and graphic designer who takes interest in changing the African narrative with code and design.

    During his travel across some northern states, he learnt about the Al-Majiri community and how they are invisible realities in their own community.

    Although the Al-Majiri system is now a nightmare compared to what it used to be, the number of children in the system keeps growing.

    Kolapo decided to tell the story of these children who should be the future of tomorrow.

    In his words, “I could show you a thousand photos exhibiting the rare & preserved beauty of Northern Nigeria”.

    “I’ve seen the beautiful tall city gates, the horses,the castles…I could tell you about the INVISIBLE PEOPLE, my people, our people who are seen only by outsiders but not the indigenes and I will. They move in troops & their cloaking device is abject poverty, that way you cannot see them because they blend into the general statuesque of Northern Nigeria and indeed the entire nation, poverty”.

    These children are found everywhere in the north and are usually treated like outcasts. In this photo story, Kolapo explains the story of the average Al-Majiri child.

    They are everywhere, everywhere”.

    These children who ought to be in school usually work as refuse collectors.

    Refuse collectors in Kano. Lots of children ages 5-15 are engaged in menial jobs around Nigeria but a little more than usual in Northern Nigeria”.

    Their parents place them in the care of Mallams who are expected to teach them Arabic and Islamic education.

    “The Al-Majiri kids usually between age 5-15 can be found everywhere in Northern Nigeria even in the eyebrow places like malls, parks, the zoo, etc. It’s almost like they are INVISIBLE”.

    In return for their education, their parents send funds and farm produce for their upkeep and also in appreciation of the Mallam’s efforts.

    The Mallams like pimps use the wards as beggars who file returns to them at the end of the day. If they don’t meet the target, the sleep in the many abandoned infrastructures around. Places like old theaters houses, behind public toilets, market stalls & so on”.

    One can only imagine the harsh conditions they have to go through.

    “An Alimajiri eating his morning ration (breakfast) from a polythene bag”.

    Most times, the few who meet their daily target get to sleep in a crowded room of 20-30 people.

    Most times in pursuit of the Mallam’s happiness they get beaten, injured, whipped for either trying to steal or behaving like one who lacks home training. These are the times where the indigenes see the INVISIBLE PEOPLE. But I wonder how a child can have home training, when they have no home”.

    Some of these children resort to menial jobs.

    These harsh conditions of survival drive some into petty crime.

    Even though their children will have to beg for a living, some parents still continue to send their children to these Mallams.

    I told my friend Abdul that in Lagos the government through its task force picks up children who hawk during school hours…He laughed and told me that if the government tried that here, they’ll be chaos because most parents don’t want their wards in “western styled” schools. They prefer them learning from the Mallams”. Check out more stories from Kolapo on his Instagram page @Kp.e.
  • 13 Pictures That Every Self-Employed Nigerian Will Relate To

    13 Pictures That Every Self-Employed Nigerian Will Relate To

    1. How people see you when you tell them you’re self employed.

    Ah my oga!

    2. When you tell your parents you’re not looking for a job and you want to work for yourself.

    See your life!

    3. When you hear people complaining endlessly about their bosses.

    Sorry.

    4. Then you realize that your employees maybe feel the same way about you.

    It cannot be. I’m a great person.

    5. How you imagined having a business will be vs. how it really is.

    Epp me.

    6. When everyone is talking about salary day, but you can’t even pay yourself most times.

    Please God!

    7. When you hear that a company doing what you do just got investment.

    I’m very happy for you.

    8. When your relatives ask you “So, when are you getting a real job?”

    Leave me alone please!

    9. When people ask you what you’re doing on the weekend.

    I’m not even crying.

    10. When you’re asked to sponsor this or that because you’re a founder, but you can barely sponsor your dinner.

    Errm…

    11. When your parents start referring your relatives to you for employment.

    WHAT?!

    12. When Nigeria decides that the best way to reward you is increase fuel prices and exchange rate.

    It’s okay…I’m okay…

    13. When you start wondering if it’s too late to go for your masters.

    But dollar is expensive so…
  • 6 Classic Songs By Late OJB Jezreel That Will Make You Miss Him Even More

    6 Classic Songs By Late OJB Jezreel That Will Make You Miss Him Even More
    Two years after going through a kidney transplant, Nigerian producer and singer, OJB Jezreel, has died at 49.

    Babatunde J. Okungbowa who was popular for producing Tuface Idibia’s African Queen died after suffering from a kidney failure relapse on June 14.

    In 2013, he was diagnosed with kidney failure and only survived after one of his wives, Mabel, donated a kidney to him. Several Nigerian celebrities also helped in funding his operation in India.

    He will be remembered for his amazing songs and here are some of them:

    1. Pum Pum

    2. Searching

    3. Pretete

    4. Missing You

    5. Beautiful As U R

    6. Jah’s My Light

    He left behind 3 wives and 8 children.

    Rest in eternal peace, OJB.

  • 10 Reasons Ooni Of Ife Is The King Of Baby Boys

    10 Reasons Ooni Of Ife Is The King Of Baby Boys
    PS: Baby boy here means he’s winning at life a.k.a ‘chopping life’. Ooni of Ife, Oba  Adeyeye Ogunwusi, who is on a visit to the U.S, will be hosting the Odunde festival which celebrates the Yoruba race in the U.S annually. Here are 10 reasons why he’s an awesome Nigerian monarch:

    1. He is an established accountant and a member of professional bodies such as the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria (ICAN) and an Associate Accounting Technician.

    2. He is forty and still living the royal baby-boy lifestyle.

    3. He runs a chain of successful businesses including Inagbe Cocowood Factory, a home furniture brand which makes use of local raw materials for production.

    4. He made efforts to squash the notorious Ife/Modakeke beef and even started a fund to develop both towns and their environs.

    5. Celebrities like Olamide aren’t shy to sit with him.

    6. He even paid Super Eagles player, Obafemi Martins a visit.

    7. He and his wife, Olori Wuraola, only know how to slay.

    8. To add to his feathers, he was recently appointed as the Chancellor of University of Nigeria, Nsukka

    9. During his visit to the U.S, he will be visiting President Obama at the White House and is set to receive a honorary award.

    10. In his honor, New York senator, Kevin Parker and Brooklyn Borough President, Eric Adams, secured permission and declared June 13 as Yoruba day.

  • Justice Rabi Umar Has Been Sworn In As Bauchi State’s First Female Chief Judge

    Justice Rabi Umar Has Been Sworn In As Bauchi State’s First Female Chief Judge

    In record breaking and women-empowering news, Bauchi state got its first female judge when Justice Rabi Talatu Umar was appointed in June 2016.

    She was appointed 2 years after the former Chief Judge, Justice Ibrahim Zango, retired in 2014.

    However, her appointment didn’t come so easy. In March 2016, her recommendation as the most qualified and suitable candidate for the position of the Chief Judge of Bauchi State was met with protests and petitions.

    One of them claimed Justice Umar wasn’t qualified enough because she wasn’t the most senior judicial officer nor an indigene of the state.

    However, Bauchi state governor, Mohammed Abubakar, on the swearing-in ceremony argued that her appointment was legal and based on her long-standing record of being upright and professional in her official assignments.

    Although haters tried to stop her, Justice Rabi has made history in Bauchi. We wish her all the best at her new job!

  • Can We Talk About This Magazine Picture Of Wizkid?

    Can We Talk About This Magazine Picture Of Wizkid?
    Popular Nigerian fashion magazine, FAB magazine, released the first online edition of their monthly publications featuring Wizkid.

    Of course, they had to put him on the cover with a brilliant cover theme showing The Milky Way which contains billions of stars, just because Wizkid is also StarBoy.

    But that’s not why we’re here.

    Let’s talk about this really ‘interesting’ picture from the magazine shoot.

    Wow! So Wizkid wants us to believe he actually uses Pound Sterling notes as tissue paper.

    Or what exactly was he trying to achieve with this picture?

    When Olamide sang about using Pound Sterling as tissue paper, we never imagined it this vividly, thanks Wizkid.

    We totally get it, he has so much money and wears designer clothes to the toilet.

    But next time he wants to ‘break the internet’ like this, he should kindly send us a warning notice.

  • The Different Kinds of Nigerian Girlfriends That Exist

    The Different Kinds of Nigerian Girlfriends That Exist

    1. The Razz Girlfriend

    Will embarass you in public You can’t take her out Her boyfriend is probably named Sege

    2. The Lowkey Most Wanted Girlfriend

    Nobody knows who she is dating But everybody still wants her She has different boyfriends she doesn’t even know about

    3. The Fortunate Girlfriend

    Everybody likes her and pities her Can give you 40% of her salary if she loves you Once you break up with her good things start happening to her

    4. The Role Model Girlfriend

    Is dating a rich guy Has the best and perfect relationship She is your boyfriend’s WCW

    5. The Talkative Girlfriend

    Wants to talk all the time Is always making grammar mistakes Can still steal your boyfriend

    6. The “our wife” Girlfriend

    Is very pretty and liked by everyone Will cook for her boyfriend and his friends Cries a lot when she is maltreated

    7. The Patient Girlfriend

    Treats her boyfriend right all the time Will forgive you if you cheat Only if you sing “African Queen” three times

    8. The Greedy Girlfriend

    Cannot keep her eyes somewhere Always looking for some special type of boyfriend called Johnny She will use all your money for funny hairstyles

    9. The Family’s Favorite Girlfriend

    Is the best girlfriend Her boyfriend’s mother and her are best friends Her boyfriend likes to call her “my wife”

    10. The Gist Bank Girlfriend

    Has every human beings gist Will tell you who your boyfriend is cheating on you with Will show you her expensive bag when you ask “where is your boyfriend?”

    11. The Relationship Advisor Girlfriend

    Will tell you what to do to have the best relationship Always has relationship problems Can dress well and steal your man at your own wedding

    12. The Secret Girlfriend

    Will dress better than the host at any party Can help you date your boyfriend Knows how to run a catering business

    13. The Angry Girlfriend

    She probably pressured her boyfriend into a relationship Can beat you up and cause trouble if you don’t propose quickly Will break up with you and block you on instagram if you smile to another girl

    14. The Sure Girlfriend

    Comes from a rich family Spoils her boyfriend whenever she can Your boyfriend is probably in her inbox
  • 19 Problems Nigerians Who Struggled With English In School Will Immediately Recognise

    19 Problems Nigerians Who Struggled With English In School Will Immediately Recognise

    1. When you thought English was going to be your best subject.

    Something you’ve been speaking since you were a kid. Should be easy!

    2. When your teacher asks you to write an essay on how you spent your last holiday and you have to write about all the places you’ve never been to.

    “I went to Jamaica with my family…”

    3. When you see “write a letter to the local government chairman of your community…” on your question paper.

    What’s this nonsense?

    4. When you ask your classmates to explain something to you and they’re speaking big grammar.

    Shoot me please!

    5. You, trying to understand the point of those summary passages.

    Still don’t know the point.

    6. When you still can’t differentiate between ‘its’ and ‘it’s’.

    See my life!

    7. You trying to pronounce words like “discombobulate” correctly.

    I must not disgrace my ancestors.

    8. When you try to read the newspapers to improve your English and see ‘words’ like “feedbacks”.

    Jesus!

    9. The main reason you hated English Language in school.

    Is it not just ordinary ‘love’ we are talking about again?

    10. When you try to form big grammar and end up shelling terribly.

    I don mess up.

    11. You when you try to say the ‘th’ in ‘mother’ and ‘they’ correctly.

    So much stress.

    12. When someone still comes to say you can’t use ‘will’ and ‘would’ whenever you like.

    Oversabi.

    13. You trying to understand the difference between American English, British English and Nigerian English:

    Nigerians and ‘short knicker’.

    14. You trying to remember “I before E except after C”.

    ‘Receive’, ‘believe’ etc…I’m still confused abeg.

    15. When they ask you to write an essay that ends with ‘it was the most unforgettable experience of my life’.

    Can you not stress me?

    16. “House is to houses, but Mouse is to mice”.

    Bruhhhhh.

    17. When you hear that the plural of ‘chief’ is ‘chiefs’ but the plural of ‘thief’ is ‘thieves’.

    What is all this?

    18. When you still don’t get an A in English after all the wahala.

    The shame.

    19. This perfect example of why English is just stress abeg.

    Ghoti=Fish.
  • Here’s Proof That Falz Is Basically Winning At Life

    Here’s Proof That Falz Is Basically Winning At Life

    This guy doesn’t call himself Falz the Bahd guy for nothing.

    First of all, he’s ridiculously funny.

    Secondly, he’s a good actor and is the only Nigerian rapper with an AMCVA award.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IUhG4l82V0

    He’s fine AF.

    He has made his own fashion statement with his signature sunglasses.

    As a brand ambassador, he totally slays adverts without having any chill.

    And finally, he just got nominated for the Best New International Act at the BET Awards.

    To vote for him, simply repost this photo on Instagram using #PickFALZ. Good-luck to Falz on this one and hope he brings the award home!

  • An Indian Politician Wants A Ban On Nigerians Entering India

    An Indian Politician Wants A Ban On Nigerians Entering India

    It looks like Donald Trump isn’t the only politician calling for the ban of a group of migrants entering his country.

    Indian politician and former minister, Ravi Naik, is calling for a ban on Nigerians coming into India.

    According to him, Nigerians have a rough attitude, are ill-mannered and the cause of riots in major parts of India.

    Describing Nigerians with an alleged racial slur, he added that Nigerians who do ‘dadagiri’, should be probed and moved out of the country.

    In his words, “They create problems everywhere, we do not want Nigerian tourists. The Central government should ban Nigerians”.

    Na wa o!

    Isn’t it unfair to blame the crimes of a group of Nigerians on the entire nationality?

    Criminals of any nationality will commit crimes whether they’re at home or abroad. Why should seeking bans be the first solution racist politicians resort to?

    He should just come out and say he’s prejudiced against Nigerians instead of pretending to love his country so much. The Indian government should find better ways to combat crime in their country.

  • DJ Cuppy Thinks Money Isn’t Everything And We Believe Her

    DJ Cuppy Thinks Money Isn’t Everything And We Believe Her
    A lot of people believe money isn’t everything in life and they’re almost always right. Because for instance, money can buy drugs but not good health.

    At least that’s what some Nigerians thought when billionaire heiress, DJ Cuppy, tweeted this sometime in 2016.

    This is really something.

    But on the other hand, money is everything to the Nigerian whose immediate needs can only be solved by lots of cash. So that tweet coming from someone who can’t relate to the average Nigerian problems left a lot of people like…

    Like seriously?

    And as if the fake-deep tweet about money was just DJ Cuppy’s attempt at famzing regular Nigerians like the rest of us…

    …She was featured in a show documenting the lavish lifestyle of rich Nigerians living in Britain.

    In the documentary, she said she hasn’t opened a bottle of champagne by herself in ages ….

    https://twitter.com/Kingwole/status/740638231171993600
    Going on about London her sister, Temi, said ‘We have done Dubai and Paris but always come back to London. You have the luxury shops, luxury cars, luxury houses, you can spend the money you have worked hard making.’

    She has 15 pairs of £1000 Swarovski crystal-covered Beats headphones and even threw a graduation party worth at least a few expensive cars …

    https://twitter.com/Kingwole/status/740641024981258240
    She said “Some could say it’s a wedding budget, to be honest” and her sister added “It would probably estimate to the same cost as a couple of nice cars”.

    Cuppy thinks she’s paved the way for female DJs in Nigeria even though she’s gotten access to events because of her privilege.

    https://twitter.com/Kingwole/status/740641167411433474
    She also said ‘We are setting the pace for young women who are trying to get out of a generational trend of just going to school, be good, get a job, get married and sit there looking pretty.’

    Oops! What about DJ Soupamodel, DJ Lambo and the rest who have been in the game all this while?

    Maybe she hasn’t heard of the successful Nigerian women who have made the news for their ground-breaking achievements.

    After flaunting so much wealth on this show, we believe you DJ Cuppy. Money really isn’t “everything”.

  • Slum2school Africa Is Changing Lives One Awesome Project At A Time

    Slum2school Africa Is Changing Lives One Awesome Project At A Time
    The fact that the educational system in Nigeria needs a complete overhaul isn’t news.

    And since it looks like it could take the Nigerian government a while to get to that point, a group of Nigerian youth have decided to make a change, one step at a time.

    In the past 4 years, Slum2school Africa has reached out and provided educational scholarships and support to 650 disadvantaged children in slums and remote communities such as Okuagbo, Saga Islands and Makoko.

    The award-winning NGO, founded by Orondaam Otto in 2012, has engaged over 5000 volunteers across 12 different countries who have actively participated in realising the vision of the organisation.

    2016 seems to be an unstoppable year for Slum2school Africa. In February, the first Early Childhood Development Centre was launched in Makoko to celebrate the 4th anniversary of the organisation.

    The center was furnished with adequate educational materials and 4 learning spaces to conveniently service 600-1000 children weekly.

    And in June, they commissioned the first fully-equipped children health care center in Makoko.

    The health center was designed to serve about 2,000 children and will at least reduce the spread of diseases among the school children. The center will also provide first aid services to children in the community.

    Thanks to these guys, there will be fewer Nigerian children out of school. Even with these accomplishments, the government needs to play its part and provide necessary amenities to children living in remote parts of the country.

  • 13 Images That Will Literally Only Make Sense To Nigerians

    13 Images That Will Literally Only Make Sense To Nigerians

    1. This perfectly accurate jab at our politicians.

    2. The finishing move in every cultural dance:

    3. The only person permitted to pass you in class:

    4. You, reading Justin Bieber’s caption in Wizkid’s voice.

    5. The most annoying thing you could do to someone in secondary school:

    6. This picture that will stress the hell out of every Nigerian:

    7. The official Nigerian tailor face:

    8. The official Nollywood pregnancy test:

    9. The Nigerian babe’s “I love you” face:

    10. The order in your house:

    11. The upcoming Nigerian musician:

    12. Every Sunday in a Nigerian church:

    13. Nigerians and Nigerianisms:

  • Tiwa Savage Is Set To Take On The International Scene With Her New Record Deal With Roc Nation

    Tiwa Savage Is Set To Take On The International Scene With Her New Record Deal With Roc Nation
    Tiwa Savage is going  international in her new deal with Roc Nation. The rumors started flying in May about her possible record deal with Jay Z’s Roc Nation.

    The hype got bigger when popular entertainment consultant and A&R, Bizzle Osikoya, shared a post about Jay Z’s interest in Tiwa’s music catalogue.

    And guess what, Tiwa Savage and Mavin Records Boss, Don Jazzy, are currently in New York and even shared pictures of their meeting with Jay Z.

    She’s set to finalise her deal with Roc Nation and that means she’ll be rubbing shoulders with artistes like Rihanna and DJ Khaled.

    It’s surprising to note Don Jazzy’s participation in this deal despite his discomfort with D’banj’s deal with G.O.O.D Music in 2012. It’s hard to forget how that drama led to the split-up of the great Mo’Hits records.

    This deal is major and shows that the only way for Nigerian music is up. Congratulations to Tiwa and we anticipate even more awesome music from here!

  • After Working With Kunle Afolayan, This Haitan Actor Thinks Nollywood Is The Best thing Since Sliced Bread

    After Working With Kunle Afolayan, This Haitan Actor Thinks Nollywood Is The Best thing Since Sliced Bread
    Not every time bash Nollywood, sometimes give them props.

    Because for every not-so-great movie and confusing translation…

    People like Tunde Kelani, Stephanie Linus, Emem Isong and Kunle Afolayan come through with awesome movies that make us fall in love with Nollywood all over again.

    After blessing us with The Figurine and the award winning October 1, Kunle Afolayan has made a new movie, titled The CEO, and it first premiered on a flight from Lagos to Paris.

    One of the actors, Haitian Jimmy Jean Louise, (aka the hot guy from Phat Girls) who was in Nigeria for the official premiere of the movie couldn’t stop gushing about Nollywood and Nigeria.

    According to him, Nigeria is one of Africa’s leading countries with the most potential and power. He even added that Nollywood has a better representation of African cinema. Nice!

    The CEO movie should be a mind-blowing movie, anyway, we expect nothing short of perfection from Kunle Afolayan.

    The movie which also features Angelique Kidjo, is about a group of top executives of a multi-national company who begin to die mysteriously during a short business trip. Watch the movie trailer here.

  • According To A Report By The Nigerian News Agency, The Enugu State Police Will Not Recruit Candidates With Tattoos

    According To A Report By The Nigerian News Agency, The Enugu State Police Will Not Recruit Candidates With Tattoos
    In case you didn’t know, The Nigerian Police recruitment short-list was released on June 2. A total of 338,227 candidates were selected for the final screening which started on June 6 as announced by the Chairman of the Police Service Commission, Mr Mike Okiro.

    What makes this screening more interesting is that about 911,000 candidates initially applied for positions available for only 10,000 people.

    On top of that, as reported by The News Agency of Nigeria, the spokesman of the Enugu state command of the Nigerian Police Force stated that over-aged people, those with some physical impediments and people with tattoos will be disqualified.

    Although this screening shows how serious the unemployment rate has gotten, we have some questions.

    Will those tattoos prevent them from keeping the law and order in the country?

    Should officers be judged based on their appearances or how well they can do the job?

    Or was this rule passed on the moral stereotype Nigerians have on tattoos?

    Is it necessary to screen out people with disabilities even if they have useful skills necessary for the job?

    What do you think about this rule? Share your thoughts in the comments section.

  • British Twin Vloggers Tried To Talk About Nigerian Twins And It Was Too Ridiculous

    British Twin Vloggers Tried To Talk About Nigerian Twins And It Was Too Ridiculous
    This post isn’t here to bore you about how Nigeria has the highest rate of twins in the world. No, seriously, it’s not news.

    It’s about a video that will definitely leave you in shock.

    According to these British twin vloggers, there’s a “little place called Yoruba” which has the highest birth rate of twins in the world. Wait what?

    After trying to explain how/why the Yoruba people name twins and pronouncing the twin names, Taiye and Kehinde, in the most ridiculous manner…

    They ended the video with some “Yorubian folk music”.

    What’s all this yama yama?

    When foreigners try to explain African culture but fail at it.

    In all honesty, they almost had it sha. But their reference to Yoruba as a place and description of Orlando Owoh’s music as “Yorubian folk music” is just unbearable.

    Watch the full video here.

  • Nigerians React To The New JAMB Cut-off Mark

    Nigerians React To The New JAMB Cut-off Mark
    The Minister of Education, Adamu Adamu, on June 2 announced that the Post-UTME screening which is usually organised by tertiary institutions for candidates who passed the JAMB cut-off will now be scrapped.

    He also added that the the new JAMB cut-off mark will be fixed at 180 for all tertiary institutions except Unilag, UI and OAU whose scores will remain at 200.

    According to him, it is not necessary for universities to organise additional entrance exams and the JAMB exam is a sufficient screening process.

    Nigerians reacted to this new development and some thought JAMB itself should be scrapped.

    Because Nigerian institutions should be independently in charge of entrance exams.

    But let’s also not forget why the Post-UTME exams were organised in the first place.

    Although some universities have taken advantage of the post UTME screening.

    https://twitter.com/jag_bros/status/738644559702429696

    Lowering standards and cancelling the screening will not improve the already failing education sector in the country.

    Because the screening was set in place because of the infamous JAMB “special centers” and malpractice scams.

    The Ministry of Education needs to implement useful policies that will improve the standard of Nigerian universities.

  • Someone Cooked Jollof But The Jollof Police Said It’s Not Real

    Someone Cooked Jollof But The Jollof Police Said It’s Not Real

    Someone jejely cooked Jollof rice and came to rub it in everybody’s face on Twitter.

    And the Jollof police on Twitter were like…

    The source of this pot of Jollof rice has been the cause of a little confusion and kasala on Twitter but let’s look into it, ZKK style.

    https://twitter.com/Burmese_Tyga/status/737990029528727552

    Because some Sherlock Holmes investigators said he didn’t cook the rice.

    Even though it is a non-stick pot, haters are saying he poured somebody’s rice into the pot.

    They’re even saying his gas cooker is not messy enough to have cooked a pot of Jollof, even if it’s possible he cleaned the gas cooker before taking the pictures.

    They even checked out how the rice caked in the pot even though he could’ve been warming the rice.

    We all kuku know how people would’ve called him a dirty boy if his gas cooker and pot were “messy”.

    Na wa o! Someone can’t even tweet a pot of Jollof without some people guessing the size of cooler it was turned from.

    Can’t somebody just wash the Jollof pot and turn it into another pot?

    And while all that drama was going on, some people claimed that Ghana has become the Jollof super power, the kings of Jollof because of the tomato scarcity.

    We have three words, this isn’t over!

    Although Mr Osi has been accused of telling a few lies on Twitter every now and then, that pot of Jollof looks amazing and those that are hating should go and cook their own.

  • A Nigerian Twitter User Created An App That Directed Tweets At Nigerian Senators

    A Nigerian Twitter User Created An  App That Directed Tweets At Nigerian Senators
    After the recent increase in fuel price, Nigerians have been really uncomfortable because the cost of goods have become more expensive as expected.

    However, the most annoying part is that this new fuel price doesn’t come with an increase in minimum wage. This means that the masses are expected to bear the consequences while top government officials continue to earn fat salaries.

    Twitter user, Timigod, got inspired by this particular tweet and created an app that directs tweets to the Nigerian senate, demanding reduction of their salaries.

    Unfortunately, the web app, Tweet At Senate, has been blocked and is currently inactive.

    https://twitter.com/timigod/status/738011511487139840

    However, Nigerians have continued to tweet about the senators’ salaries.

    Nigerian senators currently earn roughly 40 times the standard minimum wage. If the government has to take strict economic measures, all Nigerians including politicians should be involved.