Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the wordpress-seo domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /home/bcm/src/dev/www/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121 Nigerians | Page 19 of 44 | Zikoko!Nigerians | Page 19 of 44 | Zikoko!
Eid-al-Adah or sallah in Nigeria is only a couple of weeks away and you guessed it, it’s the Muslim festival that involves buying, killing and sharing of ram.
At its core, the festival is about offering a sacrifice to Allah, so it’s important you get things right. Trust us, there’s so much more to buying a ram or cow, and this guide is proof.
Go shopping weeks in advance
If you’re a Muslim planning to celebrate sallah in Nigeria, your ram should already be chilling in your compound or garage by now. If you snooze, your bank account will bleed.
Take a trip up North
Source: Nairaland
It might stress you out, but prices of ram in the North are significantly cheaper. Money-saving tip: Carpool with friends who are also looking to buy rams at affordable prices.
Inquire about the age of the ram
Source: Naijaloaded
Sound weird? Well, according to Islamic teachings, the sacrificial animal has to be at least six-month-old for sheep, one-year-old for rams, and two-year-old for cows.
Go with an experienced hand
Source: Naijaloaded
If ram traders aren’t smiling on regular days, imagine their mood during sallah? It’s best to go with an experienced hand who knows when you’re about to get ripped off.
Avoid animals with deformity
If the price is ridiculously cheap, chances are, something is wrong with the animal. You want to check thoroughly to be sure there are no injuries and the animal isn’t suffering in any way. A deformed animal voids your sacrifice.
Don’t shop online
Shopping online is convenient but you might be setting yourself up big time. It’s best to see what you’re buying in real time.
Don’t take a loan
if you don’t have the resources to buy a ram for sallah, don’t attempt a loan. It’s frowned upon; best to only buy what you can afford, even if it’s fish or turkey.
I’m an extrovert who doesn’t know how to keep friends. I know what you’re thinking: How’s that even possible? I don’t know either. All I know is I can walk into a room and vibe with everyone there, but it never goes past that. I’m terrible at keeping that “vibe” long enough to form an actual friendship.
I’ve always been like this. My social nature means I stand out among my mates, and people tend to flock to me, even during my secondary school days. But then, when they come around, I engage them for a while, lose interest and move to the next thing or person that catches my eye.
In university, I just had acquaintances. We called each other friends but never talked about the important things. I couldn’t just call them in the middle of the night when I couldn’t sleep, tell them how I was crushing on one guy, or share my worries about my mum’s health. And it wasn’t really their fault. I just didn’t know how to put my energy into being close to people like that.
So when I got into my friend group in 2019, I couldn’t believe my luck. I met Rachael* during NYSC orientation at the Iseyin camp. She’d noticed I always got food in mammy market, walked up to me one day and went, “Are you related to Dangote?” I was still trying to understand the question when she laughed and explained why she said so. We became pretty close, and even when I started to withdraw, she’d come to my bed and talk to me.
Just before the end of camp, my mum passed away, finally succumbing to her long-term heart issues, so I had to leave camp early and return home to Lagos. Rachael kept in touch and even came down to Lagos a week before the burial to be with me. That’s when I officially became part of her friend group. She got her three other friends to call to sympathise with me and made sure they also came for the burial. I hit it off with them, and before I knew it, they’d added me to their WhatsApp friend group.
Our friendship has lasted almost four years now because they put a lot into ensuring we all communicate on WhatsApp and even go on the odd girls’ trip. But I feel like the odd one out. Rachael and our other friends have known each other since university. I can just open our WhatsApp chat now and find 30+ messages of them sharing inside jokes or talking about someone I’ve never heard of.
They even like the same things. Anytime we plan a hangout, it’s almost always at someplace I don’t like because, by the time the others vote, I’m the only one with a different opinion. Let’s not even talk about how I’m a literal odd number. Before I joined, they were four in the group; I became number five. I sometimes feel like the third (or fifth) wheel, watching the others all perfectly paired up. They have this connection even outside our group activities, while the group is the primary thing I have in common with the four of them. It’s hard for me to just pick up the phone to call one of them and talk for hours.
Don’t get me wrong, they’re nice people, but I sometimes feel like I’m outside the group looking in. A perfect example is how, during Moyin*’s — one of our friends — wedding in 2021, Rachael would casually mention on the bridesmaids group chat that she’d discussed with Dara* when she slept over at her place the previous night, and they thought we needed to reconsider one thing or the other about our outfits. Like, aren’t we all in the same group for that purpose? What are these separate conversations about?
Even their parents know each other. It’s not strange to hear that Moyin’s mum called Rachael on her birthday, or that Dara’s mum sent fish to Moyin. But just three months ago, I had to travel to Abuja for work. Moyin’s mum lives in Abuja, so the day before I travelled, I asked Moyin to tell her mum I’d like to stay over at their place. I was told the house was full and that their dad didn’t like impromptu visits. I understood, but I wondered, what if it was Dara who needed a place to stay? Wouldn’t they have found a way to help? I felt hurt, but I know Moyin would’ve helped if it was her house I needed to stay in.
I’ve never told them how I feel because I don’t want to cause unnecessary drama. I know I can do a long group call just to rant, but I think I have to come to terms with the fact that they’ll always be closer to each other than me. They have common experiences I may never be able to relate to, but I guess that’s okay.
This is the closest I’ve ever gotten to real female friendships. I don’t have a best friend, but at least, I have people who look out for me, and that’s better than nothing.
*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.
Nigeria is frustrating so it’s understandable that people are choosing to let their eyes do the talking. But if you want to up your bombastic side-eye game and make people shiver with that cold stare, you might want to learn from these Nollywood queens.
Sola Sobowale
Her bombastic side eye is the blueprint for African mothers. It works perfectly when you need to give a scolding in public without speaking.
Patience Ozokwor
Think of your disciplinarian granny and you’ll get the gist of Mama G’s side eye. Use this one with caution.
Mercy Johnson
You need this one in your bombastic side eye kit as a woman. It’s the one you give your man when he’s exhibiting annoying behaviors.
Funke Akindele
This is the African aunty bombastic side eye. A must-have if you have nephews and cousins that have to be kept in line without raising a finger.
Mide Martins
Giving strong “try me” energy, this is the side eye you need for street credibility. Use it when you find yourself in street brawls.
Lola Idije
A brother or sister is capping effortlessly and you’re bearing witness to it all? This is the side eye that puts them in their place.
Men, let’s take it back to when we were around five years old. Just little boys whose lives revolved around running around with our mates. Nothing more to do beyond homework, eating and being ring bearers for our older siblings, family friends or even our own parents.
If the memory is too blurry, let’s jug it for you.
Your parents come home with the wedding news
Your relative called to say they’re getting married in three months. And just like that, wedding prep starts.
Then the couple visits your house
They come with their wedding IV in hand to officially invite your family. They tease you and ask how old you are before humbly informing your parents you’ll be their ring bearer — without consulting you first.
You overhear talks with your parents about the suit material and what it’d cost. This is the time to decide if they have to get you a new one or just make you wear the one your brother used as a ring bearer three years before.
Rehearsal
The couple comes to teach you what to do on the wedding day: “Walk to the pulpit and present the ring to the pastor. Simple as ABC.”
The anticipation begins
You enjoyed the little routine you were taught and are so excited to be the latest ring bearer in town.
The wedding day
The day has finally come. You’re dressed up in your oversized coat and feeling yourself. The bride and groom are standing in front of the congregation, and it’s time for you to present the ring to the ministering pastor.
Photoshoot time
Your mum wipes off the Jollof rice that spilled on your suit. Next, you’re forming a “big boy” because you don’t want to hold the little bride’s hand for a photo.
In too short a time…
You’ve grown up, and they told you you’re too old to be a ring bearer.
The year is 2023
Now, you’re doing best man every Saturday. Wow, life really does come at you fast.
It’s 2023, and the boys are coming to the yard with new drips — If you want to keep up with fashion trends for Nigerian men, this guide has you covered.
What do men in Nigeria wear?
Say what you want, but when it comes to fashion, Nigerian men can never be caught unfresh. Their game is super tight, and we’re constantly in awe.
With most companies opting for remote and hybrid work systems, the days of suits and ties in the corporate world are numbered. For owambes and social outings, the Nigerian man’s agbada game is on a whole different level.
Corporate outfits for Nigerian men
Bishop collar shirts
Source: Jumia
The perfect balance between corporate and casual, this is the safest option if you don’t want to appear too serious.
Average spend: ₦10k
Chinos
Source: OList
Nigerian men and chino trousers are like 5 and 6. Where one goes, the other follows. Lucky them because chinos fit just about any occasion.
Average spend: ₦10k
Corporate nativewear
Source: Ebewele Brown
We don’t know how, but gone are the days when you could only show up in nativewear on Fridays. A new range of corporate nativewear puts them in the same class as suits and shirts these days.
Average spend: ₦30k
Agbada outfits for owambes
Source: Pinterest
This is a Yoruba demon staple, but is there any Nigerian man that doesn’t want an agbada in their wardrobe? Although the game has changed these days with silk agbadas and beaded embroidery taking over the scene.
Silk lamé agbada
Source: Instagram (@denolagrey)
Although lamé is mostly associated with women, designers are taking risks these days, and trust Nigerian men to represent. But this one will make your pocket bleed sha.
Average spend: ₦150k
Agbada with beaded embroidery
Source: Instagram (@folagadebanks)
It’s giving royal-father of the day. Jump on this to appear larger than life.
Average spend: ₦100k
Hand-beaded velvet caps
Source: Afrikea
An agbada outfit is never complete without a matching cap, but things are turnt up in that department. Velvet beaded caps are the in-thing at the moment.
Average spend: ₦15k
Agbada with rhinestone embroidery
Source: Blingshiki
Nigerian men love their ice, so it just makes sense that they can now ice out their agbadas. However, it doesn’t come cheap.
Average spend: ₦100k
Two-tone aso-oke agbada
Source: Aso Oke Atelier
Two-tone aso-oke fabric is where the magic is at for men looking to make a statement with their agbada these days. It might break your bank, but at least, you’ll be the centre of attention.
Average spend: ₦70k
Casual outfits for Nigerian men
Palazzo pants
Source: Pinterest
We don’t know if Asake and DJ Spinall’s Palazzo has anything to do with this, but wide-legged pants are making a comeback.
Average spend: ₦15k
Oversized denim pants
Source: Instagram (@asakemusic)
Some people call it the Asake Johajeans, but yes, we must thank the YBNL hitmaker for showing Nigerian brothers the light once again. You’ll get good deals at Yaba for this one.
Average spend: ₦10k
Knitwear
Source: Instagram (@aso.ng)
Women jumped on the crochet wave like nothing else in 2022, but it seems tis’ now the season for men to follow. You need some audacity to pull this off sha.
Average spend: ₦30k
Tie-dye wear
Source: Instagram (@obida.shop)
Thanks to the creative twist brands like Obida and Dye Lab have put on this classic, Nigerian men have a new found love for adire.
Average spend: ₦30k
Skirts
Source: Notjustok
Bella Shmurda and Asake set the ball rolling with their controversial skirt appearances in late 2022, but we still need more men in skirts.
As you progress in your academic journey, things have a way of becoming more complex. For many people, this turn takes them by surprise, where they now struggle to pass. It’s even more annoying when you remember how you once cleared all your exams. It starts like this:
It’s primary school, and you always come first in class
It’s at this point that lecturers will say things like, “Your teacher should have taught you this in SS3, so I’m skipping this topic”. But then your SS3 teachers said, “I won’t go deep into this because when you get to uni, your lecturers will explain”.
You consider going back to primary school when things were easier
There are some important tips to keep in mind when you find yourself down bad and need to do number two in public toilets. These guys were super late to the party but we know they’ve learnt their lessons.
Dewunmi, 34
This happened at a public toilet around Ikeja along. I’d stalled from using the toilet at the office, hoping I’d manage till I get home. Bro, I was at the bus stop. I don’t know if it was the bus fumes or how rough it was but I got pressed and it was the type I couldn’t hold. Luckily, I found a public toilet a couple of buildings away, where they charged N200 for number two. The toilet was a nightmare. It was dark, the last person didn’t flush properly, and the entire floor was swamped with water and urine. I tried to hold it in and run back but I was down bad.
To make matters worse, my trousers fell on the messed-up floor with the dirty water. Had to manage and wear it like that as I stepped out. I’m sure I smelt like shit through the bus ride home and it didn’t help that flies were buzzing around my trousers.
Debola, 31
I was working at Multichoice when I had this horrible experience. I’d missed the staff bus to Ilupeju earlier that day because I was purging. So, I summoned the courage to get on a public bus to Ogba and that was when the rumbling started in my stomach. I managed to squeeze it in till I got to the last bus stop and didn’t even bother to collect my change from the conductor. Everyone at Ogba knew I was pressed that day because I was restless. Eventually, someone took me to a public toilet and these area boys were there; smoking heavily but I didn’t bother. I just wanted to get to the toilet.
The toilet was was so tiny, in a terrible state and with a stench that choked me. It was hard to use the WC, so I pulled out a DSTV pamphlet from my bag, spread it on the floor and did my thing. I folded it and threw it in the WC when I finished. I also realized that there was no water to clean up so I had to use my pant to clean up, and then I threw it in my bag. I jumped on a bike to work when I got out, and headed straight to the toilet when I got to work. I took a bath in the office toilet, stayed till I got dry and before I came out to start my day.
Hammed, 28
Definitely has to be the one at Oniru. I’d just gotten to the beach that day and I felt this terrible stomach pain. Next thing I was seriously pressed and had to find a toilet . It was a festive day so there was this crazy queue in front of the toilets. I had to join the queue and wait my turn, which was actually a very embarrassing thing to do. I just dey think am that day say shit no get shame o.
Dimeji, 32
I used to say nothing would ever make me use a public toilet in my life, until one day. I’d taken a herbal drink that really got me messed up. I thought I could hold it in but I was fighting a losing battle, so I had to find somewhere to use. I joined a queue, and when it got to my turn, I noticed the guy that left before me refused to flush. I made sure I confronted him before he left. This guy brought out a pocket knife and threatened to stab me. We got into a scuffle and my phone fell into the WC while we were struggling. I was so pissed, I retrieved my soiled phone and ended up not using the toilet. Thank God I drove because I was stinking.
James, 29
It was 2015 and we were at the NYSC camp in Abia state. A close pal had just finished a plate of noodles from mammy market and needed to do number 2. We had just a few minutes before reporting to the parade ground but he couldn’t hold it. So he went to one of these paid toilets at the mammy market. My guy was charged N300 to use the toilet but he got in and nothing was coming out. Seeing as he didn’t defecate, he came out and requested a refund but the manager refused. The manager said my guy could go in and try again. We still tease him about paying for an excursion to the toilet in mammy market.
We just want our new president to reduce the costs of these food items within his first 100 days in office before we die of starvation. We’re not asking for too much from our new president.
Egg
Source: Roselyn’s food house
Remember when you could get an egg for ₦20 or ₦30? This ₦100 madness has to stop.
Turkey
Source: The Kitchen Muse
It’s so wrong that turkey is now a protein option reserved for festive seasons in many households. Jagaban, please, run it for us. Let’s go back to the days of having a kilo of turkey for ₦1700.
Beverages
Forget fit fam, the ₦200 price tag on Coke, Fanta, Pepsi and the rest is probably why people now drink water more.
Noodles
Have you seen any pack of noodles going for ₦50? Exactly. The status quo needs to return ASAP.
Garri
A paint bucket of garri has no business being anywhere above ₦1k. We don’t have an exact figure in mind but definitely below a thousand.
Bread
Source: Taste Better From Scratch
How did we get to the point where the price of sliced and agege bread are rubbing shoulders? Is this the upside down?
Pure water
Pure water needs to return to the days of ₦5 per sachet, and ₦100 per bag.
Margarine
Source: Twitter (@stylesbymorh)
Everyone involved in making us pay over ₦1k for margarine must answer for their crimes.
Sardine
Source: Dimsale Global
₦600 for a tin of sardines is criminal, and we’ve had enough. It might come in a golden tin, but IT. IS. NOT. GOLD. ₦200 or nothing, Mr President.
This goes without saying. “Semo is the devil’s dandruff forced on us by a capitalist society,” Zikoko Bureau of Statistics. Semo tastes like sorrow and tragedy and nobody should be eating it. If you have any issues, report me to my editor.
It’s safe to say restaurant and club owners don’t mean Nigerians well with the prices of their alcohol offerings. But you can still get wasted on a budget.
These locally-made alcoholic beverages will do the job.
Ogogoro
Ogogoro deserves more credit. It gets the job done, but overuse might land you in the gutter sha.
Emu (palm wine)
Source: Juju Films
It might not be as classy as red and white wine you know, but palm wine is bae.
Burukutu:
Source: The Whistler NG
Burukutu is where the magic is at. You might walk home on your head, but will you even notice? Exactly.
Kunu
Source: Dobby’s signature
You probably don’t know there’s an alcoholic version called “Kunu Gyada”. Baileys was found dead in a ditch somewhere.
Sapele water
This local drink is what does it for our brothers and sisters in South-Southern Nigeria. Body go tell you but you won’t remember a thing. So, cheers.
Zobo liqueur
Source: The Guardian
We bet you don’t know there’s an alcoholic version of zobo that can put you on cloud nine. This is what should get your coins instead of them boring Lagos cocktails.
Jedi
Source: HCI Healthcare
If you ever find yourself at the popular Ofada Boy restaurant in Surulere, Lagos, their ‘jedi on the rocks’ offering should be getting all your coins.
It’s not like we’re trying to lead you astray, but if you’ve already decided to lie, you might as well tell a really good one. Just promise to share the money when you get it because these formats will definitely work every time.
Tell him it’s a loan
The first step is to make it seem like you intend to pay back, even though you and I both know that’s not in the plan.
And that you’d pay back with interest
Just don’t clarify what type of interest you mean. If he ever brings it up when it’s time to pay back, you can say the interest you offered was a hug or a pat on the head. Interest is interest.
Say there’s something wrong with your credit alerts
And you just want to know what it feels like for money to hit your account. You can throw in small sweet words and head rubs for pizzazz.
Tell him the last person who gave you money got blessed
If he doesn’t feel encouraged to try it out, he lacks faith in you, and why are you dating such an opp?
Say your [distant] family member swallowed a razor
Crazier things have happened. At least we were here when he heard that snake swallowed millions. Just tell him someone swallowed a razor, and now everyone needs to contribute to foot the medical bills.
Tell him you crave money in your account
This will probably only work if you’re pregnant sha. We’ll recommend getting pregnant first so this format works better for you.
Nigerian banks already have a reputation of doing everything else except their work, so this won’t be too far off. Just say something in the lines of, your bank locked your account, and boo will do the needful.
Tell him you want to buy him a gift
He’d be too impressed at the fact that you’re actually thinking of him to ask why you aren’t using your own money.
Tell him you want to buy yourself a gift
And if he says no, it just means he doesn’t think you’re worthy of good things. Is that who you should be dating, sis?
Say you want to start a business
TBH, using all the money to look good is good business, so this isn’t even a lie.
Tell him you’ve found a sugar daddy
If he likes you, he’ll know he needs to step up so they don’t snatch you away from him. If he doesn’t like you, though…
Say you’re owing Palmpay
He wouldn’t want you to be disgraced, so he’ll cough up the money.
Tell him you need money for school or anything specific
You already call him “daddy”, so he might as well start acting like your father.
Just call him and start crying
At this point, you can be as creative as possible. Form sadness and tell him you don’t think he’d still love you if you were a worm. He’d probably try to appease you, and that’s when you ask for the money.
Primary school may have stressed you out at the time, but now that you’re older and wiser (and have experienced small capitalism), you’re actually best equipped to kill it.
You can come first this time
When you brag to your kids about coming first when you were in their class, this time, it won’t be a lie.
Nobody can beat you
Your teachers will be dragging age with you so the fear you had for them once won’t even exist. Even if you don’t do your homework, they’ll only beg you to do the next one.
Automatic prefectship
There’s no way you’ll be in a class with a couple of 10-year-olds, and you won’t be made senior prefect. You are the oldest, smartest, and most mature, so why not?
You get to have an actual break time every weekday
Playing around during break time without a worry in the world was amazing. Wouldn’t it be nice to experience it again?
You need rest
You’re getting old and Nigeria has stressed you enough. Primary school was when you had the most rest. It’s time to go back to maximise it.
You don’t have to buy clothes
Uniform >>> You now have the perfect excuse not to spend money on clothes. Don’t thank me; I do it out of the goodness of my heart.
One thing primary school classes always have going for them is the great interior decor. The colourful paintings and bags all over the walls is exactly what you need.
Speaking of paintings, you finally get the chance to have fun sip and paint sessions at HERtitude 2023. Click here to get your tickets.
The late Murphy Afolabi brought a zest to his roles in Yoruba movies that left a lasting impression on viewers. Whether as a chaotic Nigerian policeman or randy lover boy, he always ate and left no crumbs.
Afolabi might be gone, but his indelible mark in Nollywood won’t be forgotten easily, and these movies are proof.
Olokiki Oru: The Midnight Sensation (2019)
Released in 2019, the Seun Olaiya-directed epic tells the story of two famed armed robbers who terrorised Yoruba towns following the fall of the Oyo Empire. Murphy Afolabi shone in his role as Opele, beside skilled actors like Ibrahim Chatta and Lateef Adedimeji.
One Blood (2016)
Source: IMDb
Shot in Malaysia and Nigeria, the Abbey Abimbola-directed action flick mirrors racism and gangsterism within the black community in Malaysia. Afolabi played Jordan, one of the gangsters, alongside Kolawole Ajeyemi and Akinyemi Olaiya.
Wasila Coded Reloaded (2022)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lV8jYdwqJbc
Afolabi tried his hands at directing in this action-packed Yoruba film. Ousted from a transport union over a misdemeanour, Wasila (Adebimpe Akintunde) joins a notorious gang. Afolabi plays Olasunkanmi alongside Jide Kosoko, Segun Arinze and Fathia Balogun.
Basira Badia (2016)
Another Yoruba action flick directed by Afolabi, Basira Badia is a story inspired by real-life events that happened in Ijora Badia (a suburb in Lagos). Afolabi plays Kenny, the leader of a street gang. The movie features Fathia Williams, Fausat Balogun and Eniola Iyiola.
Oshun, the Goddess (2018)
Source: IMDb
Afolabi features in this Ade Eketunde-directed epic alongside Femi Branch and Fathia Williams Balogun. Although the film is about the Oshun goddess, it also explores the fight against violence and abuse towards women.
Four Lions (2022)
Afolabi teams up with Kelvin Ikeduba, Ibrahim Yekini and Ibrahim Bashir for this action-packed Yoruba film. Four dreadful armed robbers, backed by a spiritual father, terrorise a community until they have a heated faceoff with the police. This is another production he directed himself.
Abiku (2022)
Months before his demise, Afolabi actively promoted this movie on his socials. He featured in and directed the film before releasing it on YouTube. In it, Afolabi plays a spiritual being whose soul was tethered to an “abiku” (a child predestined to die).
The hottest girls in Lagos are coming to the yard on May 27. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
On WhatsApp, you can do a lot more than staying in touch with loved ones — if you didn’t already know this, here’s your much-needed guide on how to make money online in Nigeria with Whatsapp.
What is WhatsApp?
WhatsApp is an instant messaging platform that allows users to stay connected in real-time and basically keep in touch. Think of it as that one app that came to the aid of Nigerians when telcos ripped them off with ridiculous phone call tariff plans.
Over the years, WhatsApp’s contact-gathering model has opened its users’ eyes to the many money-making potentials of the app. From heavy marketing through broadcast messages to advertising products via the status update feature, there are several options to explore if you want to make money online.
If you’re still clueless about how to make money on WhatsApp in Nigeria, this is the guide you need.
Advertise your products and services
WhatsApp contacts can potential customers or can help you generate sales leads for new or existing business owners.
All you need to do is make sure you’re making the most of your contact list and consistently amplifying your marketing efforts by doing these things:
Source: Sasaeniyanng
Advertise your products and services by sending broadcast messages to contacts and WhatsApp groups.
Share pictures of your products and make announcements on your WhatsApp status.
Consider using the WhatsApp for Business app as it comes with features that will make your business organised.
Affiliate marketing
If you’re considering ways to make money on WhatsApp in Nigeria, don’t sleep on affiliate marketing. In plain terms, you’ll simply be promoting other people’s products or services and getting commissions from them.
First, find credible affiliate programmes and get a referral link that assures your commission anytime a sale is made through you. Some companies also have affiliate links to products on their website.
Once you have a referral link, start thinking of creative ways to approach your WhatsApp contacts. The link can be shared as a WhatsApp status, in WhatsApp groups or as a broadcast message. Whenever someone on your contact list makes a purchase, you smile to the bank with your affiliate commission.
You also stand to earn if your contacts share your affiliate link with their contacts and people make purchases.
It’s important that with each sales effort, you take stock of products your contacts are interested in. You can run a quick survey with the poll feature on WhatsApp to find out your contacts’ consumer needs.
Consider this option to make money on Whatsapp in Nigeria if you’re proficient in your field and can easily transfer knowledge. The bulk of the work comes from promoting your online workshop or webinars in relevant WhatsApp groups and encouraging your contact to help you share too.
You can set your desired registration fee as long as you can assure participants that they would get value for their money. It’s important that with each seminar, you create a new WhatsApp group and keep in touch with your students from time to time. This way, you’re growing an audience that’ll always appreciate your products and services.
How to make money from WhatsApp stickers
If you’ve made fun of a friend or family member who uses ridiculous stickers of themselves during chats, the joke is on you as they’re most likely smiling to the bank.
Chatting on WhatsApp became a lot more enjoyable with the introduction of stickers, but do you know people are cashing out from it? WhatsApp allows users to create their stickers and earn from them whenever users download from the store. To earn money on WhatsApp in Nigeria this way, here are some useful tips:
Create stickers: You don’t have to be a graphics designer to do this. You can simply convert personal pictures to stickers using the Stickers for WhatsApp & Maker app.
Compile a sticker pack: Make sure you keep to a central theme. For instance, you can have a Baba Suwe or Wizkid sticker pack.
Upload sticker packs to online stores such as and sell them. You should consider offering the sticker pack for free initially to attract a customer base.
Once you have a sizable audience, consider offering premium or exclusive sticker packs for a fee.
Use in-app purchases or subscription models within Whatsapp to monetise your sticker packs.
How to monetise Whatsapp Groups
Source: WhatsApp
There’s no WhatsApp feature that allows you to earn by creating or joining a WhatsApp group at the moment, but this isn’t to say you can’t make money online this way. Your contact list can easily get cluttered with each new number you add, but with a WhatsApp group, it’s easier to grow your audience and build a network of potential customers in an organised way.
While you can join other groups for networking, it’s advisable to create your own WhatsApp group where you’ll be the administrator. This way, you’ll have full control and can keep things organised for your audience.
You can create and manage groups for relationship topics, employment opportunities, movie lovers, etc. then tailor your marketing efforts to the audience in each group.
With all of this in place, here are some pointers to help you monetise a WhatsApp group:
Share your affiliate marketing links in the group.
Collaborate with experts to conduct online workshops/webinars for a fee.
Pitch your WhatsApp group to businesses for advertising gigs. For example, if you build a WhatsApp community for movie lovers, filmmakers can advertise their projects on your platform.
It’s important to create and share engaging content on your WhatsApp group from time to time. This will help you build a loyal following and will help you avoid getting “aired” when you’re marketing a product or service. God, abeg.
Become a WhatsApp marketer
There’s such a thing as a WhatsApp marketer, and this is one of the several ways to make money online in Nigeria. As a WhatsApp marketer, your most important job is growing your contact list.
Think of your loaded contact list as your product, and proceed to market this product to anyone who cares to listen. Use your social media platforms to announce your contact list with some of these messages:
Reach new customers through my vibrant WhatsApp group of 1000 active members.
Join our thriving WhatsApp group with 1000 active participants to tap into a goldmine of new customers today.
Expand your customer base with our vibrant WhatsApp group that boasts 1000 engaged members. Join now and make sales.
Provide consultation services
If you’re an expert in a particular field, this is another easy-peasy way for you to make money on WhatsApp in Nigeria. With WhatsApp’s voice call and video conferencing features, you can make a killing by offering consulting services.
Whether your expertise is in health, fashion, business or entertainment, you can provide personalised advice and guidance to clients through virtual one-on-one conversations via WhatsApp.
Develop a strong reputation for delivering valuable insights and urge your satisfied clients to spread the word.
You can also blow your trumpet through broadcast messages to your contacts, messages to WhatsApp groups and the status update feature. Just make sure to charge all your new clients properly.
Join the hottest babes in Lagos for the hottest women-only party on May 27. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
I’m in my early 20s, but I still see myself as a child. I used to think all early 20s folks see themselves this way, but I’m beginning to realise there aren’t too many of us on that boat.
I graduated from the university in 2019, and with each passing month, my old primary, secondary school and university classmates are taking the huge step of getting married and/or having kids.
What’s even crazier is it’s the folks who swore that love is a scam that are the first to go.
You could be on the street, and John Bosco who promised to become a Catholic priest would drive by in his Sienna with his two kids. Love really has a way of changing your plans.
I can’t even imagine having a kid right now. So of course, I’m concerned by the level of work social media puts into making babies look like angels.
I’m a child myself. Having my own child right now is a recipe for disaster. I’d get angry over the stupidest things.
Kids are really expensive too. I’m sorry, but if I’m going to spend that much money on something, I should be getting some kind of ROI.
I really admire those who are starting families anyway. It takes a lot to believe in a cause so completely to devote your entire life to it.
I’m not ready for that kind of responsibility yet. Imagine being responsible for people who aren’t me. I’m barely responsible for myself. Marriage is so scary and final. I know divorce exists, but I don’t think anyone goes into marriage with the intention of divorcing later. What’s especially scary is the fact that people change and there’s nothing you can do about it. Even I know that I wasn’t the same person I was a few years ago.
The patience that marriage requires doesn’t sound like something I have yet. I’ll have to be completely accountable to another person. I can’t just decide to go on a trip or make a big purchase. It’s bondage, but I’d be deeply in love with the person I’m in bondage with.
I hope I get married someday — definitely not today — but till then, I’ll write articles and make sure every hot babe knows about HERtitude. You too can get your tickets here.
Talk True is a Zikoko limited series for medical myth-busting. With each episode, we’ll talk to medical professionals about commonly misunderstood health issues to get the actual facts.
The odds of you waking up and developing a sudden craving for cranberry juice are pretty minimal. With its characteristic tart taste, cranberry juice doesn’t rank high on popular refreshment choices, but it’s a hit in the online feminine wellness space.
Here’s why
A quick vaginal health/wellness search on Instagram will reveal many vendors touting the belief that cranberry juice will make Urinary Tract Infections (UTIs) go away forever. Is this claim based on facts, or is it a myth? Dr Mary Alo provides answers.
First off, what’s a urinary tract infection?
As the name implies, it’s a bacterial infection of any part of the urinary system, which includes the kidneys, ureters, bladder and urethra. In women, it’s typically characterised by a burning sensation while peeing, cloudy or bright red urine, frequent passing of small amounts of urine, fever and pelvic pain.
Image: Sora Shimazaki on Pexels
While men can also have urinary tract infections, women are at a greater risk because they have a shorter urethra than men, making it easier for bacteria to travel to the bladder. Other gender-specific risk factors include using contraceptive diaphragms, pregnancy, frequent sexual activity with new partners and menopause.
It’s important to note that while sex can cause bacteria to move further into the urinary system, UTIs aren’t contagious/sexually transmitted infections.
You know what’ll be contagious, though? The amount of fun you’ll have at HERtitude — Zikoko’s women-only party for the hottest babes. Get tickets here.
How does cranberry juice come in?
Some sources also claim that regular intake of cranberry juice improves the vagina’s “taste” — even though no scientific evidence supports the claim. But Mary explains the flaw in this logic.
“UTIs are infections majorly caused by a bacterial organism called Escherichia coli (E. Coli), and as such, are best treated with antibiotics. The rationale for using cranberry juice is that it can, in a way, help to preserve the flora. Infections are more likely to occur when the normal flora of the urinary tract is disturbed. E. Coli works by attaching itself to the host’s tissue, and current hypothesis suggests that cranberry juice works to prevent the adherence of E. Coli to the urothelium of the urinary tract. Without this attachment, the bacteria can’t infect the mucosal surface, thus preventing an infection from occurring.
But this is prevention. It isn’t enough rationale to use it as a form of treatment as UTIs can only be treated with antibiotics.”
Should you ditch it, then?
Not exactly.
“It makes more sense to use cranberry juice in a proportionate amount as a preventive measure, though I wouldn’t recommend that’s all you use to prevent urinary tract infections.
You can use it in addition to concrete preventive measures like drinking more water, urinating before and after sexual intercourse to limit the spread of bacteria, wiping the vaginal area from front to back after using the toilet and not abusing antibiotics.”
Better treatment options for UTIs
Mary emphasises that urinary tract infections can only be treated with antibiotics.
“Once your healthcare provider confirms that the symptoms point to a urinary tract infection, the next thing to do is prescribe the appropriate antibiotic regimen for treatment. Don’t let people who are more profit-oriented tell you otherwise. Cranberry juice is just one of many ways to prevent UTIs — especially in recurrent infections — and it works in tandem with other preventive measures.”
The takeaway
Cranberry juice has benefits for feminine wellness and vaginal health, but it can’t cure urinary tract infections. At best, it’s a preventive measure, but not in isolation if preventing UTIs is the primary goal.
Love Life is a Zikoko weekly series about love, relationships, situationships, entanglements and everything in between.
Please, take it from the top. How did you meet Daniel?
We met at work in 2018. We used to work in different departments of a bank’s head office. I was in marketing, he was in IT, and if you’re familiar with how banks work, you know these two departments liaise often.
I met him when I had an issue to resolve for a client. I went to his department, and the task was assigned to him. It took us two months to sort out the issue, and that’s how we started talking every other day. I was drawn to his reserved personality from the beginning. When we finally resolved the problem, he sent me a bottle of wine to celebrate, and I thought it was really nice of him.
I admired that he didn’t try to flirt or act inappropriately when we worked together, which guys did a lot. They may not necessarily harass you, but they always want to get familiar too quickly once they know you’re a girl they’ll be working closely with for some time. I liked that he was respectful and understood boundaries.
Some weeks after the whole thing, my mum was marking her 50th birthday with a big party, and my siblings and I were encouraged to invite all our friends. When I was scrolling through my contact list, I saw his name and remembered how cordial he was, so I invited him on a whim.
When did you start dating?
It was a gradual process, TBH. At the party, he was really cool. He came right on time while others came late, and he stayed till the end. He was respectful to my family and was the only friend who brought my mum a gift — a china plate set. My parents still use it in their house today. It was so lovely.
After that, we started talking. I’d just come out of a one-year relationship, so I wasn’t really in a hurry. But things became official in March 2019, when we went on our first proper date.
Had he met Somi by this time?
Yes, they met briefly at my mum’s birthday. But they didn’t really meet till my birthday hangout in July. We all went to the beach with a couple of our friends. They got along well. Daniel is naturally a kind, caring person. His parents raised him well, and I don’t say that lightly. He’s one of the most respectful people I know.
After our beach hangout, we started having double dates once in a while; us, Somi and her boyfriend. The hangouts happened naturally when we found someplace cool to hang and we wanted to share the moment with other people without making it too complicated by inviting our friends.
Got it. How did your relationship with Daniel go in general?
It went well. Special days like my birthday, Valentine, Christmas, were even more special with him because he’s an intentional and thoughtful person. Sometimes, he’d do grand gestures like when he sent gift and food baskets with trumpeters to my office on our first Valentine’s together in 2020. Other times, he’d just send meaningful gifts. Our first Christmas together in 2019, he got me knee and wrist supports because I started going to the gym some weeks earlier.
Did you know he’d propose when he did?
Yes and no. Things were going well for about two years before he popped the question, so it was definitely at the back of my mind that we might get married. But we didn’t really discuss it beforehand.
Our lives had become intertwined such that we were always either together or chatting randomly over the phone. I switched banks a year into our relationship, but we were both still in the banking sector and worked on the island, so it was easy to navigate our relationship with work. And he got along well with everyone in my family. I found it so easy to introduce him to everyone.
Why then didn’t it work out in the end?
See, Daniel is a good guy to have as a boyfriend in general. But was he a good guy for me in particular? I don’t think so. We didn’t really have much in common. I love to go out and be outside. It’s pretty important to me to attend events, both social and work-related, to meet people, explore places; I even love just driving around. I visit people a lot and love celebrating with them.
Daniel doesn’t mind these things, but he also loves solitude a lot. He loves to read; I can never get past five pages of a book. I’m also an active person, and if you’re a regular gym person, you know the lifestyle is pretty exciting. The gym is a great place to network too. Well, Daniel is a real couch potato. You can’t get him to run for his salvation.
These things weren’t really a big deal at first, but as soon as we got engaged, it became more obvious that we couldn’t really gist about things. He always wanted to talk about movies or books or something he found out online to do with tech, science, celebrities. I only ever wanted to talk about the things happening around us, like what happened at work or at that restaurant I went to, or on the road to his house. A lot of times, we had nothing to offer each other when one person is talking about what interests them.
But why did that become obvious only after the engagement?
It was always obvious, but it didn’t choke me until the thought of a lifetime together started hanging in the air. We spent even more time together, and I started seeing him come to life more with certain other people. Yes, including Somi. He had a lot in common with her, and they could always engage in conversation on a deeper level than we could.
But she wasn’t the reason I broke off the engagement. It was the deeper realisation that our connection was on a surface level. We liked each other a lot, and I wanted someone that caring and loyal in my corner, but did I really love him? I started questioning myself a lot as the d-day got closer.
If you want to share your own Love Life story, fill out this form.
Want to attend the hottest party for the hottest babe this Saturday, grab your Zikoko HERtitude tickets here before it’s too late
What was the defining moment for you that made it clear you had to end it?
I woke up the morning of my bridal shower, and my heart was heavy. I just knew I couldn’t go through with it anymore. I was no longer excited about marrying Daniel. There’s no other way to explain it. And I didn’t want to allow what people might say to make me enter something so permanent. So I went to his house, and I explained this to him. We had a long conversation about it, and his emotional reaction almost made me change my mind, but I had to be strong. Changing my mind out of pity would’ve been the worst thing to do anyway.
True. But how did you feel when your sister told you she was now seeing him?
I won’t lie, I was upset. I couldn’t believe it when she told me, but my sister and I mean a lot to each other. We’ve been through so much together, and I know her more than anyone in this world. I know she didn’t have a drop of bad will against me when she started getting close to Daniel. She said nothing had happened between them and nothing would if I told her I wouldn’t accept it. And I believed her.
Can I ask why?
Daniel and Somi have so much in common. They’re both too nice for their own good and very bookish. They used to chat about movies for hours on end when I was the one dating him, and it was so cool to watch how excited they’d get. I knew it was hurting Somi to even ask me about it, knowing fully well that their relationship would be unconventional given my recent history with him. I didn’t want to be the one to put her through further misery.
Would I have preferred her to connect so deeply with someone besides my ex? Yes, of course. But do I think they had a natural connection that had nothing to do with me? Absolutely. Why would I keep them apart just out of spite?
Fair enough. What’s it like being in their lives now that they’re married?
It was weird at first, not just watching them be in love, but also seeing them hold back their affection because they didn’t want me to be uncomfortable. But I didn’t linger on the weirdness. My extended family also gives them a lot of heat, especially Somi. So I’d say they’ve paid for their “sins”. Just kidding. We’re all good. We’ve started to hang out more this year since I got engaged again.
About that. What was it like recovering from one engagement and getting into another?
It was rough, but I pulled through. I actually dated someone for about four months before I got together with my fiance. That relationship didn’t last because it was just me trying to find someone as fun-loving to attend all the events I’d missed while I was with Daniel. It wasn’t very deep, so it fizzled out just as easily as it started.
I wasn’t really looking when I met my fiance. I was a bit down when Somi started dating Daniel because I suddenly missed him always being there for me. You can say I was in a vulnerable state, so a new relationship was the last thing on my mind. In fact, I threw myself into work. And again, that’s where I found a man.
Tell us about it, please
In 2022, I got a new job at a fintech company. About two months in, I had to meet with their brand and marketing agency which was supposed to present some go-to-market strategies for one of our new products.
Obinna was the senior rep they sent to demonstrate the strategies in our office. He also became the point person as soon as we approved the agency’s plans, so almost like Daniel, we started communicating a lot and having to accompany each other to external work events. We got along so well it was almost too good to be true. At first, I told myself he’s probably this charming to all women. But when he started reaching out for us to hang out outside of work tasks, I didn’t hate it. Then we started going out together every evening after work and then again on weekends.
Sounds like the perfect match you were looking for
You can say that.
We never even had the “Be my girlfriend” or “What are we?” conversation. We just spent so much time together that asking would’ve been denying the obvious. And it was exciting to have something so clear it didn’t need words. I’m not saying it couldn’t have gone badly o, but sometimes, when you know, you know.
Is that why you got engaged so quickly though?
We got engaged just last month, on the one-year anniversary of the day we met. How long is long enough to date before getting engaged, please? But yeah, this time, I’m sure I love him, and we understand each other so well.
Right. And does Obinna feel anyhow about your ex being part of the family now?
Oh. That’s a big question o. We haven’t really had that conversation. He was definitely taken aback when he heard the story, but he’s really cordial with Daniel.
Again, Daniel is very good-natured. He’s not the type of person to give anyone cause to suspect or be wary just by seeing him and being around him, except you’re a particularly overbearing person. And Obinna isn’t, so my guess is he hasn’t thought about it that deeply at this time. He hasn’t even brought it up.
Maybe I should go and ask him after this interview.
Fingers crossed for you. How would you rate your love life on a scale of 1 to 10?
Umm. 8. Obinna and I have a good thing going.
Check back every Thursday by 9 AM for new Love Life stories here. The stories will also be a part of the Ships newsletter, so sign up here.
How many times have you heard a person say things like “It is well”, “Nothing do you” “No shaking” when you know at the back of your mind that there is absolutely no assurance that something will not do them. I mean, it’s just life, and things happen. So, how can you not be covered?
This reminds me of the time when I tried to speak to my friend Chinedu about the importance of getting auto insurance, especially with his sub-standard driving skills. He told me right to my face to mind my business and leave auto affairs to men like him, saying “no worry, if e happen, we go run am”.
So, imagine my surprise when he called me on a random Sunday afternoon begging to borrow 150K for car repairs as he had just been involved in an accident with a car. I could even hear the third party fuming in the background. I had to ask Chinedu “ Shebi you be man, oya run am now” but apparently neither he or his car could run it.
Or is it the time when my sister, the “It is well” warrior, was losing staff to a seasonal flu which made her pay their hospital bills out of pocket? Mama kept on shouting “It is well” with every bill when in reality all was not well and she was losing money. It was just “sorrows sorrows prayers” every time. After the third bill she jazzed up and turned to the health insurance plan I had been telling her about.
These experiences have taught me that getting insurance with MyCoverGenius is a decision that requires no second thought. With MyCoverGenius’ quality and affordable health insurance, you can secure medical coverage for yourself, your business and loved ones for as little as ₦2,500 a month. The onboarding process is simple and seamless. They provide 24-hour Telemedicine support for expert consultations, avoiding second-guessing symptoms. So hurry up and sign up at www.mycovergenius.com to experience the peace of mind that comes with being protected.
Remember, it’s not just positive vibes that can shape your future; it’s also the actions you take to safeguard your well-being. Choose MyCoverGenius for comprehensive health insurance coverage you can rely on.
If you were born into a Yoruba Christian home, I’m almost certain that Yinka Ayefele was a big part of your childhood. Even if it wasn’t, you’ve probably heard his songs which were characterised by fast beats and catchy lyrics. Nearly every naming ceremony had the DJs blasting these songs on their speakers.
Honestly, they slapped differently.
1,2,3,4
5,6,7,8 alayo mi ni. This song would make you lose your home training in a Godly manner. You could be battling the worst heartbreak known to man and somehow, it would help you recover.
Eyin Temi Bawo Ni O
Sewa. Le le le le le le le sewa. If your name is Sewa, this was probably as close to musical royalty as it could get.
Ime, Imela, Imela, Jehovah Mela
Ayinkele Gymnastic Imela. We all knew that wasn’t what he said, but we shouted it at the top of our voices regardless.
Emi Ni Temi Mi O Mo J’orin Lo
His rent was definitely due when he hit us with this banger.
Baba Pamilerin Ayo
The mix of makossa and fuji here got everyone dancing. Those were the days.
Mu Mi Lo Si
Ibi giga, to ga ju aiye. Oluwa jo wo o wa gbe mi soke. This was peak vocal dexterity. The ability to get so high in pitch while raising his voice simultaneously puts Ayefele up there as one of the best of his generation.
Do Ti La Mi So Fa
Do Do Do Re Mi. It isn’t quite the tonic solfa taught in music schools but it’s definitely as iconic. Screaming it at the top of your lungs and dancing as the beat drops made it hit harder.
Odun Ikore
This song had tears welling up in the eyes of grown men as they jammed to the chorus at the top of their voices.
Te Ota Mole
Te Ota Mole Left Right. If the angels had a marching song, it honestly felt like this would be it. It has the correct blend of military grit and musical cohesion.
Even though parents are extra in general, Nigerian parents take the cake. But just how extra are they? We asked people to tell us the wildest, most embarrassing thing their parents have done to or for them. Here’s what they said.
“My dad sexted with my boyfriend” — Amanda*, 20
I’m an only child, and my dad is very strict. I got my first phone at 18 only because I had to leave home for university. Anytime I came home for holidays, my dad would demand I limit my phone usage so we could “spend time as a family”.
One Saturday, during one holiday like that, I was exchanging suggestive texts with my boyfriend on WhatsApp when I had to leave my phone to run a brief errand. I still don’t know how my dad got my password, but he saw the chats. And when my boyfriend asked if I wanted to see how hard he was, I kid you not, my dad typed, “Yes, baby”. My boyfriend sent a dick pic, and my dad was horrified. When I got home that day, he beat me so much, I saw heaven and came back.
“My mum fought me in school over a tampon” — Tina*, 18
My mum and I weren’t the best of friends growing up. Maybe it was teenage rebellion, but we couldn’t understand or communicate well with each other. In JSS 3, I started menstruating and decided to try tampons since my friends always talked about them. I knew my mum would never allow me to use hers, so I just took some without her consent. She discovered they were missing while I was in school, and she searched my room and found the opened wrappers.
She was so pissed she called my school and had them punish me. She also arrived 30 minutes later and jumped me. We literally had a dirty fight on the floor in front of all my seniors and my crush! It was so embarrassing.
She eventually apologised, and we’re besties now that I’m older, but I still call her out for it at least once a week.
“My dad brought my naked baby pictures to school” — June*, 22
I was in Primary Six, and it was Children’s Day. Parents were invited, so my dad came armed with my stark naked baby pictures and shared them with all my teachers. No one asked him to bring the pictures o; he just did. My classmates saw them too, and made fun of me for the longest time after that incident.
Your parents might disapprove, but it shouldn’t stop you from attending Zikoko’s HERtitude — the hottest party for all the hot babes. Get tickets here.
“My mum visited my boss to warn him” — Henry, 27
My very first boss was toxic. He had crazy expectations, and the funny thing was it was an unpaid internship. He’d expect me to be at the office at 7 a.m. even though work started at 9. You also couldn’t leave the office until he left. It was difficult, but I was learning a lot, so I endured.
My mum had other plans. She never said anything suspicious when I complained about work stress, so imagine my shock when she walked into our office at 7 p.m. one day. Closing time was 5 p.m., but as usual, we were still there because of my boss. She requested to see him, and even though they spoke in his office, everyone on the floor heard her seriously warning and cussing him out. Then she told me to follow her home. Of course, I didn’t even try to resume at the office the next day.
I attended a military secondary school where my soldier father worked. Female students had to be on low-cut hair, and people who grew their hair longer than the required length would have their hair cut by the soldiers.
When we were writing WAEC in SS 3, I didn’t shave my hair because I wanted to grow it and just tied a really tight scarf every morning so my hair would shrink and appear low-cut. At home, my dad would remind me every other day to go shave my hair and just start growing it after WAEC, but I delayed, hoping he’d forget.
That’s how I went to school for my last paper after shrinking my hair as usual. And my dad just singled me out during our assembly, put a comb in my hair to stretch it out and proceeded to shave it in front of the entire school. He never apologised.
“She told the entire church about my bed-wetting issues” — John, 24
I had potty training issues and wet the bed at night till I was around 11 years old. My mother tried so many things, including making me pee on hot coals and waking me up at night to pee, but I still somehow peed on the bed.
When I was ten, my church was organising a deliverance for children, and she attended it with me and my siblings. At a point, the pastor said parents should declare their children’s issues so it would end forever, and this woman really took a microphone and announced my bed-wetting. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me. All my friends and a couple of my classmates were there, so it spread to school too. The bed-wetting didn’t stop till about a year later, and I attribute the delay to the relentless bullying my mother’s “declaration” caused me in school.
“My mum slapped me in front of my crush” — Princess, 26
My mum had this best friend when I was younger. I naturally became close to her best friend’s son because we practically grew up together. I also started crushing on him.
Unfortunately for me, both mothers started quarrelling when I was 17, and I didn’t know. One day, I was walking with my mother and brothers around a popular T-junction in Port Harcourt, where we wanted to get a cab. My crush saw us and came to me so we could walk together. My mother and brothers were ahead of us. My crush and I were talking, and he soon started asking me out. I started forming hard-to-get, smiling sheepishly as he was toasting me.
When we got to where my mum was, and she noticed the smile on our faces, the next thing she did was slap the living daylight out of me in the presence of the boy and all the people around that busy junction.
Some passersby even had to hold me because I visibly saw stars. It was later I even got to know about the quarrel. That’s how I just received the brunt of other people’s malice o.
*Some names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.
The “Evil Eye” is a cast or glance at someone that may inflict harm, suffering or some form of bad luck on their lives. You know how you don’t share an important milestone or major win because you fear it’s all going to get jinxed? Well, the jinxing bit might have something to do with this “evil eye”. You know what’s even weirder? The ”looker” doesn’t have to lift an arm to cause a chain of possibly catastrophic events. God, abeg.
People who choose to keep their private lives away from the internet might be on to something sha.
We had a chat with some Nigerians, and their Evil Eye experiences are chilling, to say the least.
“My sister’s baby cries every time I post her picture on WhatsApp”— Funmi*, 28
I was always posting pictures of my niece when my twin sister put to bed, and I started to notice a funny pattern: Every time I posted my niece’s picture, she would cry throughout the night without sleeping. My sister would always call me crying and saying she doesn’t know why the baby is throwing a tantrum. I started feeling weird because it happened only on the days I posted her pictures on WhatsApp. I remember posting her picture again to confirm my suspicion after noticing the pattern. It happened again and that was when I decided to pray about it. At first, I kept it to myself, but I eventually told my sister.
“My hair falls out whenever people compliment it” — Fareeda*, 26
I have long and full hair. Anytime people see it they keep “awwwnnning” over it. But I started to notice that I lose a lot of my hair whenever that happened, especially when I was in secondary school. Anything people admired about the hair would be affected. My hairline, the healthy scalp, the length, the fullness… Large chunks of my hair would literally fall out.
“We had a nasty fight after I posted his picture on his birthday” — Fikayo*, 29
I once posted my boyfriend’s pictures to celebrate his birthday. Afterwards, we had a nasty fight that almost led to a breakup. Mind you, this is a relationship of about three years. I remember sharing the pictures, and people I’d not spoken to in years started texting me that day, some I didn’t even have their numbers anymore. Before then, I’d only posted his picture online once.
“I started having dreams that put my babe in bad light” — Oyin*, 28
I remember one Sunday afternoon when my boo stood up as a single in church because there was no category for “in a relationship.” I made a fuss about it on my WhatsApp status and someone sent A DM saying she knew my relationship wasn’t going to last because I was rubbing him in everyone’s face even when we weren’t married.
I was livid, but before I knew it, I started having dreams that put my babe in a bad light, and all I could think about was wanting to break up. Naturally, I’ve found that keeping things to myself before they happen makes them happen.
“Posted about my new job, and it was the beginning of the end” — Latoye*, 31
I’d been working at this cool place for months but kept it private because I wasn’t ready to share it with anyone. It wasn’t even because I thought about jinxing it or anything; I just wanted to put in the work before making an announcement.
The day I eventually shared the news on Twitter and WhatsApp, there was this weird presence I felt around me. The congratulatory messages poured in and some people even reposted. I got to work the next morning, and let’s just say it was the beginning of an end. Was making silly mistakes that were actually detrimental to the business. Long story short, my contract was terminated. I have a new job now, and only my family members know.
“The company terminated her appointment after sponsoring the family visa and paying for flight” — Dotun*, 28
My sister-in-law got a job in the Netherlands in March 2022. The company sponsored visas for her, her husband and their child. They were expecting her arrival in July and had even paid for their flight. By the end of June 2022, the visas were ready. Out of excitement, my sis-in-law she posted her testimony on her WhatsApp status, and two days later, the company called to inform her they don’t need her services anymore. Her flight was cancelled on July 1, 2022. She’s just recovering from the effect it had on her mental health. Thank God her husband had not resigned from his job.
*Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.
Join Lagos babes for the hottest women-only party going down on May 27. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
The only person more curious than a five-year-old is a woman in love. They are the masters of asking questions with the most obvious answers. Anyway, we still love them sha. Your girlfriend has probably asked you one of these questions before.
Would you still love me if I was a worm?
What kind of wahala is this now?
Why are you calling me that?
This always comes after you call her by her government name. “My name is Babe, not Tolu.”
Why haven’t you apologised to me yet?
This is her method of apologising by the way.
Oh, you have forgotten me, your girlfriend?
This is after you’ve not replied to her message for a grand total of three minutes.
Are you cheating on me?
Sister, even if I was cheating, do you think the way you’d find out is by you randomly asking me?
Do I look fat in this dress?
Dear Kings, never answer yes to this question. NEVER.
Do you love me?
This question always pops out of the blue. You’ll have to spend the next 20 minutes reassuring her that the pimple on her face hasn’t made you stop loving her.
Get your girlfriend HERtitude tickets here if you want a break from these questions.
A staggering number of young Nigerians spend time on TikTok and if you’re one of them, here’s your ultimate guide to how you can make money on TikTok in Nigeria.
What is TikTok?
TikTok is another video-based platform that has grown to become one of the most popular social media network with over a billion monthly active users.
A lot of young Nigerians have fallen in love with the platform, particularly because it’s easy to grow a large following if you consistently share content that users find interesting. But do you know that you can monetize the content you create on TikTok? In 2022, American media personality and TikTok creator, Charli D’Amelio earned an estimated $17.5m on the platform.
Read this guide to make money online in Nigeria as a TikTok creator.
Create an active account
It goes without saying that your first step to earning an income on TikTok is to sign up. Follow these steps to create an account; it takes five minutes.
Sell products on TikTok
If you’re a business owner and have a large following on TikTok, this is your easiest bet to becoming a top-paid TikTok creator. Create content around your product and watch your revenue increase. For example, if you create recipe videos and highlight the products you use, Maggi can pay you to use their product in your videos if you know what you’re doing.
Live giveaways
Are you even Nigerian if giveaways don’t excite you? TikTok allows users to participate in live giveaways, and you can earn an average of $1–3 per giveaway.
To make money online in Nigeria this way, you need to have at least a thousand subscribers, which grants you access to the stream feature. TikTok allows followers to appreciate you by sending virtual gifts. The virtual gifts are icons that represent a different dollar amount. You can proceed to trade your virtual icons for virtual diamonds. The virtual diamonds are what you need to collect real money via platforms like PayPal.
Some tips to note:
Spend some time on your live sessions: The longer you stay, the higher the chances of more people joining and giving you that schmoney.
Do it at the right time: Study your audience and know when they’re most active., Figure out if they’re nightcrawlers or morning people. This means you’re either going live first thing in the morning or late at night when the normal people are asleep.
Affiliate marketing
Don’t sleep on affiliate marketing if you want to make money on TikTok in Nigeria. If you don’t have a sizable following (1k-5k), it might be best to wait it out while you work on increasing your organic traffic.
With affiliate marketing, you’re advertising products/services online via links, and it’s a win-win situation if you’re able to convert your followers to customers.
Depending on the terms, you can be compensated with as much as $5 for every sale you close. Now, let’s imagine a scenario where you get $5 each from a thousand paying followers. Do the maths dear.
Offer advertising services
With a huge following on TikTok, you are sitting on a potential money-minting machine. First, gather your analytics as this will help you charge your actual worth from brands.
Once you have the numbers at hand, seek out businesses looking to sell their market and offer advertising services. Since it’s a paid ad, you’ll be using your video to promote their products and services.
P.S: You have to put on your negotiating cap to make a killing here.
TikTok creator fund
Source: TikTok
The Creators Fund is TikTok’s way of telling creators on the platform: we see you and we appreciate you. The catch? It’s appreciation that comes with funds.
This method of earning money on TikTok is handy for users who create instructional material or live streaming. The creator also has the option of going with either of two monthly programmes: “Informative Content” and “Live Broadcasts.”
To earn money this way, it’s important for content creators to apply and meet up with requirements within a month.
Some key requirements:
Be at least 18 years old,
Post original content that adheres to the site’s guidelines,
Publish at least three videos in the past month, and
Get an average of 10,000 views per video.
P.S: The TikTok Creator Fund is not available for creators in Nigeria.
TikTok Creator Marketplace
Source: TikTok
Think of the creator marketplace as where creators close big deals. So, you definitely want to be here if you’d like to make money on TikTok in Nigeria.
It’s the official platform for brands and creators to partner on projects. Here, brands are able to choose from a pool of creators that align with their campaign needs.
The marketplace can be likened to an influencer agency where brands can easily choose who they want to collaborate with.
No specific requirements by TikTok but you want to keep the following in mind:
You are over the age of 18
You have an account with more than 10 thousand subscribers;
You’ve released at least three videos and got one hundred thousand likes in the preceding 28 days.
Join hashtag challenge
TikTok is the gift that keeps giving because what other social network lets you make money from using hashtags? Hashtag challenges are organised by the network itself or sponsors, and it gives users an opportunity to earn extra money.
Popular vloggers are contracted to promote the hashtag and they get paid for their services. It’s important to note that TikTok’s advertising department is the only entity authorised to organise an official hashtag challenge and the budget runs into several millions of dollars.
However, brands can also approach creators on the platform to promote a hashtag at a fee.
The money babes are attending the hottest women-only party in Lagos on May 27. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
I was at the Spotify African Heat Party on Saturday and first of all, I’d just like to say thank you to my boss, for choosing me to go because I had the best time! I can’t remember the last time I danced that much. I had to sleep for a whole day to recover. Let me tell you some of my favourite things from the party:
Handi and Wanni
Not only were the main DJs for the night two gorgeous women who also happen to be twin sisters, I love how easily they got the crowd lit. They would play music then leave their DJ table to come and drop moves on the stage. I loved them so much. They got everyone really hyped up for the party.
Performances
I lost my voice from screaming out loud to every song the performers performed. Odumodu Black came on stage and I sang Declan Rice like my life depended on it. Teni came on stage with her best friend— a mascot (a bird wearing a jersey with Teni’s name on it) and her entire performance reminded me of how much of a badass she is at this music thing. My favourite part was when she came down from the stage and started singing in the middle of the crowd. Joeboy was the final performer and I didn’t want him to leave the stage. I just wanted him to keep serenading me like I’m the love of his life.
The DJs
Sarz came and scattered the dancefloor with his Amapiano afrobeat mix. Every time he transitioned into a new song, people screamed in excitement because it was always a hit. Sarz is really not anybody’s mate. Then DJ Tohbad came and told us that we weren’t done dancing and kept dropping jams upon jams. My feet have still not recovered.
Everyone dancing
I love how everyone was so comfortable and relaxed. We all danced and genuinely had a great time. The Spotify crew went around hyping people while they were dancing. It was like having your own personal hypeman for a bit.
The food truck
This food truck saved my life. After I used up all my energy dancing, I became crazy hungry. I was so happy that there was a food truck still serving food at midnight. I don’t know if it was the hunger or the adrenaline from all the dancing, but the shawarma I had slapped like a Nigerian mother. More parties need to adopt the concept of selling affordable food till whenever the party ends. Sometimes, Jay’s Diner is too far away.
How close to the stage I was
One of the highlights of the entire event was how close I was to the stage. I’m talking “I-could-almost-touch-the-performers’-shoes” close. Also, everyone had the same tickets and had equal access to the entire venue, which is rare at Lagos parties. It made the party even more fun, we were all just feeling the music and vibing together.
The photobooth
There was a really cool danfo photo booth that people loved. Spotify was very intentional about the ambience and decor of the venue. Even the food truck matched the theme.
The event left no doubt that African Heat is the ultimate go-to for all things African music and culture. It proudly showcased Spotify’s strong commitment to promoting the rise of African artists and making sure they have their shining moment in the spotlight.
Maybe it’s the social media handlers or their Gen-Z kids, all we know is that these Nollywood OGs serve delightful content on their Instagram pages and we’re here for it.
Shaffy Bello
Source: Instagram (@shaffybello)
She’s not only excellent at acting, she’s also good at fashunz. If you’re looking for fashion inspiration for your mum and aunts, Sheffy’s IG page is the blueprint. She just gets it.
Richard Mofe Damijo
Source: Instagram (@mofedamijo)
The youngins have got nothing on Pa Damijo and his IG page is a testimony. Whether he’s modelling new outfits or working on set, there’s a swag just that stays with him as he ages like fine wine.
Sola Sobowale
Source: Instagram (@solasobowale)
Since her return to the scenes in Kemi Adetiba-directed Wedding Party, Mummy Sola has won the hearts of Gen-Zs. She’s a delight, and her IG page is proof.
Chidi Mokeme
Source: Instagram (@chidimokeme)
He was MIA for a while until his epic return in Ini Edo-directed series, Shanty Town. Mokeme has a new Gen-Z fan base and you can tell his IG page is now giving life. We love to see it!
Kate Henshaw
Source: Instagram (@k8henshaw)
Being a fitness inspiration to young people at 51 is not beans but Kate Henshaw does it so well. Her IG page is colourful mix of dance and exercise videos. We love it!
Mo Abudu
Source: Instagram (@moabudu)
The media executive and owner of Ebony Life Studios IG page screams hot girl all day, every day. Whether she’s delivering a speech at Harvard or having a daiquiri, her photos are always a hit.
Ramsey Nouah
Our resident Nollywood bad boy’s IG feed says he’s still got it. Whether he’s playing polo or travelling the world, the moments are nicely captured.
Speaking of hot girls, have you gotten tickets to the hottest women-only party going down on May 27 In Lagos? Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
Miss Shawarma was that one meal we couldn’t get enough of because she was just perfect.
Can’t say the same nowadays. It’s hard to put shawarma and class in the same sentence. So how did shawarma lose all her rizz?
Source: Kikifoodies
Dated food bloggers
Shawarma’s real trouble started when she was discovered by food bloggers. All the mysterious things that made her so yummy became public knowledge—no thanks to the countless videos of “How to make your own shawarma” on the interwebs.
Too much (Pitta) bread
Source: Forks and Foliage
Like hair to Samson, so is pitta bread to shawarma. The fact that you could walk into random supermarkets and buy pitta bread gave many people the idea that anyone can make shawarma.
Everywhere you go like MTN
Maybe we should blame it on the fact that Davido’s Unavailable came rather late. Every bus stop in Lagos has a shawarma stand. Take a leaf from Davido’s book babes.
Became a cheap babe
It was a little harder to buy shawarma on a whim when the least we could pay was N2500 for a serving. Can’t say the same anymore with N500 shawarma everywhere. She needs to learn from seafood okra.
Hopped on the Owambe train
Not our classy shawarma fighting for recognition with abula, ofada rice, and ewa aganyin at owambe functions. You can’t compete with the OGs like that. Leave that to small chops.
Became a people pleaser
Shawarma’s dignity was intact when she was just for beef and chicken lovers. These days? There’s seafood, noodle, jollof, suya, mushroom and all sorts. Why dear? Everyone can’t like you and that’s okay.
There’ll be loads to eat and drink at the hottest women-only party in Lagos on May 27th. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
Contrary to opinions on the streets of Twitter, you don’t just wake up one day and decide to cook up a storm for four straight days unprovoked — at least, that wasn’t Hilda Baci’s M.O for shattering a Guinness World Record.
“It took me five years to be ready for this attempt,” the 27-year-old chef shared during a chat with Zikoko a week before the cook-a-thon.
Source: BellaNaija
Baci first nurtured the idea when she was 21. However, the lack of resources or a big enough platform at the time kept the dream at bay — until she was ready to pick it up again late in 2022.
Months ahead of the impressive cook-a-thon, Hilda Baci was in every room and literally everyone’s face with a single message: “I’m breaking a world record, and you must bear witness.”
A strong desire to be taken seriously by peers and big brands in the food industry is what drove her.
And oh boy, did the world pay attention to this audacious woman? In Baci, many could see a reflection of themselves, inspired even, to attempt their own individual records.
An expensive venture no doubt, Baci had to collaborate with top brands in the culinary industry: Gino Max, Bama Mayonnaise, Woodscope, VivaPlus Detergent, Chillcity, Uber, Oriki, Beige Wallet, among others.
A month ahead of the cook-a-thon, Baci challenged herself to a 24-hour dry run, and the success of it would erase any doubts she had about breaking a world record.
Let the cook-a-thon begin
Source: Instagram (@hildabacicookathon)
At 10 a.m. on Thursday, May 11, 2023, the doors of Baci’s make-shift kitchen at Amore Gardens, Lekki, were thrown open for the world to witness greatness in its entirety.
Supporters and well-wishers poured through the gates with a clear mission: Hype Hilda Baci till the finish line. This mission reverberated through the country until the cook-a-thon became the most talked about topic in the Nigerian social media space.
From those inspired by Baci’s strength and audacity to others who called their own culinary skills to question, it was all beautiful to see.
And we have the receipts:
Ghanaians even tried to claim Hilda Baci as one of their own.
The previous holder of the record, Lata Tondon, sent her best wishes to Hilda.
Guinness World Record holder for longest dance party, Kaffy, also showed up for her.
Guinness World Record Holder for the longest Dance Party after she and her dance group danced for 55 Hours and 40 minutes, Kaffy came around to encourage Hilda Baci as she aims to join her to be a Record Holder.
What screams support more than a colleague willing to hit the streets with a placard?
Guysss, please retweet and let the world know our own Hilda Baci is on the way to beat the current Guinness Book of Records for cooking for 4 days nonstop. Please come out and support her with your cheers and prayers #hildabaci#Hildabacicookathonpic.twitter.com/RZPVMalI1g
— Diary of a kichen lover (@diaryofakitchen) May 13, 2023
Amid the excitement, there were growing concerns about the possibility that Guinness World Records would snub Baci’s attempt, but this was nipped in the bud after she was acknowledged in a Twitter post.
Our records team is looking forward to reviewing the evidence from Hilda's epic cooking marathon.https://t.co/fzRlNpqU8e
At 7:46 a.m. on Monday, May 15 (officially, day four of the cook-a-thon), Baci shattered Chef Tondon’s existing record of 87 hours, 45 minutes and 00 seconds.
However, the journey was far from over as she had a mission to set a new record of cooking for 96 hours — a feat which was accomplished at precisely 4 p.m. on the same Monday.
But Baci would not only shock herself, but also the world, when she went an additional four hours to finally turn off the gas at 100 hours.
Meet Hilda Baci’s team
While it’s important to celebrate Hilda Baci’s impressive feat, there were superstars behind her who made this feat possible. Nigerians especially fell in love with, Ajom Sunday Okwe (AKA Chef Sunny), the sous chef who occasionally dabbed Baci’s face when it got extra sweaty.
We spoke to her PR coordinator, Nene Bejide, and here’s what she had to say.
There’s been a lot of hype for the chef who stayed in the kitchen with Hilda. Which other team members should we be celebrating?
I’ll say Nowe, for putting the team together. Chef Gibs, who came onboard through Hilda — he’s the president of the Culinary Arts Practitioners Association of Nigeria (CAPA). Chef Gibs was very instrumental to how the food flowed. He worked with Hilda to put the menu together and break it into rounds. He also helped her during the dry run to calculate the time she spent on each meal.
Hilda is a fast cook. So it was important for him to let her know how long to spend on each meal to avoid complete burnout.
Has any of the team members been inspired to set their own world record?
There’ve been conversations like that — although some of them might’ve been jokes. But yeah, I’m sure the cook-a-thon has gotten them thinking about what to do.
Before she stepped into the kitchen, Baci shared what she hoped to achieve with her record-breaking attempt.
You could shatter a record that seems almost impossible when you set out. What would you do with the platform and visibility?
I want to make a conscious effort to propagate Nigerian recipes across the globe. Nigerian food is so good and works with many palates. We have so many options. I want people from other countries to try our meals just like we try creamy pasta, spaghetti bolognese and the likes. At least one Nigerian meal should be part of every household’s staple.
Do you have words for young chefs who have been inspired by your cook-a-thon?
Your dreams are valid. Focus on the journey and pay no mind to what other people are doing. Be consistent; it guarantees your growth in life. You must also learn to put God first in everything you do.
What makes you feel fulfilled at this particular moment?
My journey so far, and where I’m coming from. When I think about that, it makes me happy.
Zikoko caught up with Baci three days after she broke the world record, and her joy was contagious. Here’s what she had to share:
Were you tempted to quit after breaking the existing record?
Honestly, when I broke the record I didn’t feel like my job was done. It just felt like another hour, and I knew I’d not gotten to my goal. I’d already conditioned my mind to hit a certain goal.
But after the 96th hour — your original goal — why did you push for the extra four hours? That was a surprise no one saw coming.
There was no special reason really. My friends had come to me and suggested doing 100 hours since it would make it a round figure. My brother was in on it too, so I thought about it and with the way I was feeling at the time, it was doable. I ran it through my culinary director, and he said we still had raw materials to cook for more people, so I went for it.
How did it feel to finally turn in the last meal and switch off the gas?
Relief. Just relief.
I was so happy and grateful to God. I couldn’t believe I’d gotten to that point. Just remembering how difficult it was when I started, and then, I’d gotten to that point? It felt incredible.
GWR already acknowledged your attempt. What’s the end game if you don’t get the title?
If this is about a win, I’ve already gotten a win. But I’m almost certain we’ll be recognised, and this isn’t from a place of arrogance. We did our due diligence, we followed the rules and guidelines to the T. Jason, a current record holder, was very helpful in making sure my CCTV was up and running. We also took witness statements.
I’m almost certain we’ll get it, but even if we don’t, I won’t break a sweat.
Do you plan on returning to the kitchen soon?
Of course. Sooner than you think.
I haven’t done any cooking since the cook-a-thon, but best believe I’ll get back to it soon. I own a restaurant; I have work to do.
Join Hilda Baci to party at the hottest women-only party in Lagos on May 27. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
For this “A Day in the Life”, we’re chronicling what it means to hustle in Nigeria as someone who’s still trying to find a hustle. Daniel rants about his experiences and tells us why “unemployed” isn’t the right adjective for him.
6:00 a.m.
I woke up early today, as usual. No, I’m not a “go-getter” who wakes up on Monday mornings to watch motivational videos and start grinding. I’ve just realised it’s easier if my mum doesn’t wake up before me. Who wants to start their day with lectures of, “How are you going to find a job if you’re always sleeping?” In this house, we avoid wahala.
The first thing I do is check my emails. I must have applied to at least 15 jobs in the past week, and it’s still radio silence. I’ve been actively job-seeking since I got laid off seven months ago, and a lot has changed. Before, I wouldn’t apply to jobs that didn’t state the salary in the job description, but now, let’s just say I’ve learned. But what’s with recruiters and not stating the salary? What does “competitive salary” even mean?
They need to know that the salary is no longer competing with anything. Do they know how much data and transportation alone cost these days? Ask Twitter people, and they’ll tell you that ₦400k doesn’t do anything in the streets anymore. Is it until I apply for a job and go through one million interviews that I’ll know the budget for the role is ₦80k? You people should pity somebody.
12:00 p.m.
I think there should be a level between employed and unemployed. I fall under the unemployed, but it feels like I’ve never worked so hard in my life. Job-searching is a full-time job. I just finished updating my CV and cover letter for the umpteenth time, and I’m wondering who had the bright idea to invent cover letters in the first place.
It’s always, “Update your CV” or “Don’t use the same CV and cover letter to apply to every job so it’s tailored to the role”. Do I want to use my whole life to write CVs? Don’t I have other things I’m thinking about?
If it’s not about updating it, it’s about how different people have what they think a good CV should look like. One said I should add a link to my LinkedIn profile. Another one said adding links in CVs isn’t good. One will say I should add my gender, and another one will say it’s not necessary. I think we all need to come together and just create a Nigerian CV constitution because it’s not me you people will confuse.
4:00 p.m.
I just found an interview invite in my email, and I don’t know whether to be happy or not because I don’t even remember applying there. First, it’s in Ikeja, and we know what that could mean. It’s one of three options: It’s legit, it’s a scam, or they want to relieve me of my body parts. The other two seem more likely. But at this rate, I’ll most likely go. One thing must kill a man.
8:00 p.m.
Can we talk about crazy job expectations? Because I just saw one that’s doing my head in. How can you say you’re looking for a virtual assistant but require advanced software administration skills?
Another one I saw even asked applicants to write a 500-word letter. As per school essay?
One day, we’ll find these companies and recruiters and show them just half the shege they’ve shown us. But till then, we keep looking. This money must be made.
We’ve all had that dreadful moment when number two catches you outside and you just have to dash into a public toilet.
If it’s at a fancy venue, you’re safe. But this guide is for when you find yourself at the public restrooms in bus parks and marketplaces.
Skip the first toilet
No one wants to take a long stroll inside a public toilet, so the first spot is always the easiest option. That means you’re more likely to find a clean toilet if you skip to the third or fourth.
Don’t breathe
As you walk in, the first thing you want to do is hold your breath. Think about it, if you don’t breathe, how will you smell other people’s business?
Tip toe
You’ll most likely walk into a pool of stagnant water mixed with urine. So you want to apply your best tiptoeing techniques or risk getting splashed.
Don’t touch anything
Ideally, the only thing your hands should be touching is your clothes to make way for your business, and your butt when you clean up.
Lock the door
It’s embarrassing enough when your siblings barge into the toilet while you’re emptying your bowels. Now, imagine a complete stranger.
Protect your belongings
You have to go in with them but also maintain zero contact. The best thing to do is to hang everything you came with around your neck.
Wash your hands
But because there’ll most likely be no water supply, always carry a sanitizer around.
The hottest babes are partying hard on May 27th at HERtitude23. Grab your ticket here.
Secondary school holds a lot of fun memories for some people. For others, not so much. Regardless, we all had our best and worst memories. We’ve decided to rank the classes from “so good you wouldn’t mind repeating” to “so bad if you could leave after the first term you would”.
Taking on the tag of “final-year student” is amazing. The risks that are taken and the flex of writing external exams put it right up there as the most enjoyable class. The joy of finally leaving secondary school is one of the top three most amazing feelings; probably after reading an inside life article and a pregnancy scare.
SS1
Very few feelings beat the joy of finally moving to Senior Secondary School. The new uniforms, the ability to drop some subjects, and the general flex of being in Senior Secondary School put it at no 2. There hasn’t been a more iconic change of fits since the transfiguration.
It’s not a completely bad class, to be fair. It feels nice being at the end of Junior Secondary School but that’s where it stops. The constant classes and the crazy preparation for the Junior WAEC (West African Examinations Council) exams make it a more unlikeable class.
This is a perfect case of so close yet so far. The SS3 v SS2 rivalry is real. To make things worse, all the subjects get so much harder. To cap it all, the SS3 guys will still make a ritual of going after the SS2 girls.
This is the real ghetto. The best description is that it’s life at the bottom of the secondary school food chain. It’s a new environment with higher academic expectations, and often times, bullies. It gets better, but the first few months are brutal.
Speaking of lists, HERtitude is at the top of everyone’s party list. Click here to get tickets to the coolest gathering of hot babes.
Bonus – Holidays
It isn’t a class but it’s definitely the best time during secondary school. Why can’t every day just be a holiday?
We know it’s not the Olympics but it felt that way as a teenager in secondary school. The sports, the competition, the joy of winning, and the pain of defeat. Secondary school inter-house sports had everything. Apart from Yellow House always coming last, here are the type of people you’ll find at every school’s inter-house sports.
The all-rounders
These ones can run, march, jump and play football. It’s almost as if they were created for sports.
The sprinters
All they care about is winning the races. The 100 metres gold is all that’s on their mind. The rest of the house should go and hustle their own medals.
Every house needs a supporting cheer group. They’re always loud and notice everything, even drawing the attention of the officials to the things they missed.
Maybe it’s the japa wave or love is just surplus in the air, a staggering number of young Nigerians are doing together-forever on a daily basis.
Ikoyi registry is the preferred for many (especially japa enthusiasts) and the people who work there use this information to their advantage. This is how you can outsmart their Sodiq Ologbon ways.
Go with a mobile wardrobe
You’ll think you’ve picked the best outfit until they say you’re casual in your drip. Don’t mind them, it’s a plan to make you buy from the cut and sew vendors within the compound.
Put on your resting bitch face
It’s a day of joy but if you smile too much, you’re calling for billing and they will answer you. Only the LOYL should see your teeth outside.
Five is a crowd
To be honest, you only need one witness each and that’s a total of four people. Going with many people easily places a target for billing on your head.
Suffocate them with mouth odour
Staying quiet for long means a buildup of funky breath in your mouth. You and the LOYL will be swiftly dismissed at every stop.
Linkup with money changers mint ₦50-₦100 bills
Here’s the thing, no matter what, you will spend money at the Ikoyi registry. But hey, what’s a couple of ₦50-₦100 notes? the most you’ll part with is ₦2500.
Show up in Ankara
First impression matters or what’s that thing they say? The workers at Ikoyi registry won’t take you seriously if your wedding day baffs doesn’t compare to their everyday drip.
Don’t go with food
It’s never going to be enough and you’ll end up getting guilt tripped to sort others who didn’t get food packs with money. Better to avoid completely.
Eko’s hottest are linking up on May 27. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.
If there’s one thing you can never go wrong with, it’s telling a woman sweet nothings to make her feel special. So whether you’re trying to leave the friend zone or you want your partner to fall in love again and again, this article will help you do just that.
Sweet words to make her feel loved
Image: Zikoko memes
You love her, but does she know? This list of cute things to send her will help her get the picture.
I love you more than I did yesterday but less than I will tomorrow.
You complete me. Now, I know how Adam felt.
Who needs NEPA/a transformer when you light up my life?
With you by my side, even Lagos traffic feels like paradise.
You’re easily the best part of my day, every day.
If no one is perfect, then your middle name must be “no one”.
I’ve never been this happy to release my mumu button. Just take it. It belongs to you.
Every time I think about you, there’s this weird fluttering in my stomach. I don’t know if that’s what they refer to as butterflies, but I don’t mind it.
Sweet words to make her laugh
Image: Zikoko memes
Even after she’s done reading these, she’ll remember them much later and laugh.
Are you oxygen? Because you’re the reason why I breathe.
Don’t tell my mother, but I fit die on top your matter.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I think you have a really cute laugh, so I hope this makes you laugh.
I’d say I can’t breathe when you’re not near, but we’re not in Bridgerton, so , “Have you eaten?” They practically mean the same thing.
Your middle name should be Google because you’re always right, and you have everything I’ve been searching for in a woman.
Not to be unoriginal, but when I look into your eyes, all I see is your waist.
If this was a Nollywood movie, we’d probably need to investigate if you gave me a love potion. You’re always on my mind.
Anytime I’m sad, I only have to spend a moment with you. Seriously, how do you do it?
I was listening to MC Galaxy’s Fine Girl, and I think he was talking about you. Because, really, na who born this fine girl?
You know what she’d really love, though? Tickets to Zikoko’s HERtitude! Click here to buy some for her
Sweet words when you miss her
Image: Zikoko memes
Why just stick with, “I miss you”, when you can wax lyrical with these options instead?
You’re my happy place, and you’re not here. In summary, I’m not happy. Please fix it because I miss you.
Distance may keep us physically apart, but my heart is never far from you. Can’t wait to see you again.
I just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you and counting down the minutes till I get to see you again.
I miss the sound of your voice and laughter. Phone calls just don’t cut it anymore.
When you’re not here, I feel incomplete. You’re that one missing piece of the puzzle that’s my life.
You know how it feels when you lose something valuable? That’s how I feel right now. I can’t wait to hold you again.
You’re the ewa agoyin to my bread and the akara to my pap. I can’t live without you. I miss you more than you know.
I miss your beautiful smile, sweet voice and everything about you. Come back to me soon, my love.
Distance may be trying harder than Nigeria’s wahala right now, but my love for you knows no bounds. I miss you, my darling.
Like smoky jollof, you fill my thoughts. No, I’m not hungry. I just really miss you.
Me without you is like a phone without internet connection; plain useless. Come back soon.
Sweet words when she’s angry with you
Image: Zikoko memes
You offended your babe, and now, she won’t talk to you? It might be over for you, but try sending her these cute texts first. There’s no harm in trying.
I messed up, and I really hope you forgive me. Can I send my apology to your bank account?
I really don’t like fighting with you. What can I do to make it better?
We both have coconut heads, but I guess I really love your coconut head. Forgive me?
You mean everything to me. I hope you remember that, even in moments like this.
I messed up. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness. But I love you, and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
I know you can’t stand me right now, but how do you look so good even when you’re angry?
I hate this so much. Can we make up already?
I know I hurt you, and I’m truly sorry. You mean everything to me. I want to make things right. Can you forgive me?
I don’t have any excuses. For my sake, I hope you’re as forgiving as you’re beautiful.
The Bible said something about not letting the sun set on your anger. Sounds like really good advice right now, don’t you think?
No one’s in a good mood 100% of the time. These texts might be just what she needs to feel better on a sad day.
I know things aren’t the best right now, but I promise they’ll get better. You’re strong and resilient, and I’m always here to help you through it all.
Shit happens, but I want you to always remember you’re loved and cherished. You bring so much joy into my life, and I’ll do anything to make you feel better.
Remember you have one super fan — Me. I’ll always support you.
Hey baby, I’m sorry you’re feeling down today. Don’t forget I’m here for you. Sending you all my love and support.
You came into my life and filled all the dark holes in my heart; I intend to do the same for you every day.
You’re a correct babe, and that’s how I know you’ll get through this. I love you.
Nothing do you. This too shall pass, and I’ll be there with you till we get to the other side.
Sweet words to text her in the morning
Image: Ketut Subiyanto via Pexels
Looking for sweet nothings to say that’d put a smile on her face when she wakes up? We got you.
Good morning, beautiful. I hope you slept well. Have an amazing day ahead of you.
Rise and shine, my love. I’m so grateful to wake up to you every day.
Thinking about you this morning, and I already feel like I can achieve anything I set my mind to. I hope you have a day as extraordinary as you are.
Every morning reminds me that I really hit the girlfriend jackpot with you. I’m so blessed.
Waking up to your smile, whether you’re with me or not, is the best way to start my day. Good morning, beautiful.
I wanted to wish you a day as beautiful as you are, but that’s impossible. Have you seen your beauty? Good morning, my love.
You make every morning better just by being in my life. Thank you for making me the luckiest guy in the world.
I never thought I’d find someone as amazing as you. The universe must really like me. Good morning, my love.
I hope this day brings you all the joy and happiness you deserve. Good morning, my beautiful one.
Here’s to hoping the traffic clears immediately you step out this morning. I love you.
Just thinking of you this morning makes me smile. Good morning, baby.
They can act like they don’t care, but trust us when we say these gift ideas for men will answer their many “God when?” questions.
As you search for the best gift ideas for the different men in your life—siblings, father, co-worker, husband, boyfriend, sons— we want you to pay attention to this list curated with all our love.
So what will get that man grinning? Let’s go.
Birthday gift ideas for men
Sponsor a weekend getaway
That man deserves to see the world. We’ll let you decide if you’re sending him to Benin Republic or Togo. Also, if you have the money and can afford it, a trip to Santorini or Paris.
Average spend: ₦500k- ₦2 million.
A shopping spree
You’ve seen his drip on occasions so you know his style. Take his ATM card and buy all his essentials.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦500k
Cook-a-storm
Show that man you can do better than Hilda Baci. If she cooked 80 recipes, raise him 100 pots of local delicacies. Afterall, the way to a man’s heart is his stomach or something like that.
Average spend: ₦20-₦100k.
Book a spa appointment
Source: TripAdvisor
He’ll be in that massage bed thanking God for the day he met a thoughtful queen like you. Doesn’t matter if you’re his wife, mum, sister or friend.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦200k.
Organise a hang-out with his guys
Men hardly have time to throw parties but will they attend one with their gees? Just make sure to cater for all their food needs. Buy them liquor too, they like that.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦200k.
An underwear set
Source: Konga
Forget the trash-talking on Twitter , men actually appreciate boxers and singlet. You can go the extra mile with designer brands.
Average spend: ₦20-₦50k.
Footwear
Source: The Modest Man
A lot of men obsess over sneakers, shoes and palm slippers. Pay attention to his favourite and get him a or two. Bonus point: Go for designer brands.
Average spend: ₦10-₦200k.
Mobile phone
Source: Stuff
Chances are, he already has an expensive phone. But men like to stay updated and you can go the extra mile by gifting him the latest version of his device. Be sure to know if he’s an Apple bro or Samsung brethren.
Average spend: ₦200k-₦1m.
Cologne
Source: Pinterest
Men love to smell good but they don’t want to go in a room smelling like a thousand other bros. Make it your mission to find his signature scent and ensure that he hardly runs out.
Average spend: ₦10k-₦300k.
Game console
Source: Konga
It has to be the latest PlayStation console. But hey, half is better than none, if you can’t afford the latest just make sure you buy one.
Average spend: ₦200k-₦500k.
Graduation gift ideas for men
Whether he just bagged a new degree or completed an online course, you want to motivate your man and let me know that you recognized his efforts.
A new whip
More Nigerian parents need to embrace the idea of gifting cars during milestone achievement. Your son just bagged a degree? Spend that money!
Average spend: ₦2m – ₦50 Million.
Graduation party
Let’s be honest, school isn’t easy. If anyone makes it to graduation, they deserve to be thrown a party with their loved ones. Although, we can’t say parties come cheap.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦500k.
Book a photoshoot session
Pictures preserve memories and you can be thoughtful by helping the celebrant immortalize one of their most prized moments. Please dear, book a professional photographer and not ‘photooo’.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦150k.
Graduation Cake
Source: Pinterest
Personally, we believe there should be a cake for every celebration because why not? The key here is to make sure a special message comes with the cake.
Average spend: ₦10k-₦50k.
Gift hamper
Source: Konga
No, you don’t give out hampers during the Christmas season alone. Curate a personalized hamper and include items like: Notepads, pen, playing cards, wallet, multi-tool pen, etc.
Average spend: ₦20k-₦100k.
Personalized photobook
Source: PhotoNaija
Chances are, he shared memories with you throughout his stay in uni. Go the extra mile and document these memories in a photobook. He might cringe at first, but never you mind, he loves that shit!
Average spend: N25k-N100K.
Wedding anniversary gift for men
You should be celebrating every year spent with the love of your life. It’s nice to say you love him but this list of gift ideas for men will help you prove your words with actions.
Couple’s massage
It’s a gift for him but God forbid you leave your LOML in the hands of a masseuse. Go with him, and if things get extra heated, you might even have the room to yourself.
Average spend: ₦70k-₦200k.
Weekend getaway
Source: Visit Greece
If you have kids, send them to their grannies. A private trip to some of the most romantic destinations in the world. You can do Olumo rock too if that’s what you can afford. It’s the thought that counts.
Average spend: ₦200k-₦2m.
Vow renewal
An opportunity to tell each other “for richer, for richer” Very yes please! You can keep it private or have family and friends witness the true love story.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦500k.
Certification
More skills mean more earning potential and that’s good for everybody. Do your research and pay for a course that will shoot him up his career ladder. Don’t sleep on this gift idea for men.
Average spend: ₦100k-₦500k.
Personalized accessories
You want him to think of you everywhere. Whether he’s at work or stuck in traffic on the 3rd mainland bridge, he’ll always smile when he sees your words or initials on his belt, bracelet or wallet.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦100k.
Customized Bible or Quran
Source: iStock
Remember how you picked the Holy book on your engagement day? You want to remind him that the word of God is still important in your union.
Average spend: ₦5k-₦50k.
Set up a man cave
Source: Essential Home
Nigerian landlords are wicked and it’s expensive to have the luxury of space. However, if you do, it’s time to put on your interior designing cap; create a safe space just for him. Hear hear, this will cost money.
Average spend: ₦500k-₦5m.
Cinema date
Source: iStock
If you can rent out the entire cinema, please do. Otherwise, just you and your man are see a romantic movie that will reignite the flames of your love.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦200k.
Upgrade his wedding ring
Consider this as an investment for the future. If it’s a silver ring, upgrade it to a diamond.
Average spend: ₦1m-₦20m.
Hot intercourse
It doesn’t matter if they get it every other day, men love sex. The key here is to try something extra different and special. Maybe grant his BDSM fantasies—just kidding.
Average spend: ₦0.
Father’s Day gift ideas
Mothers get most of the love but we know fathers also want it. This is your opportunity to show daddy how much you appreciate him picking up the bills and leaving his wallet open at all times.
Money
It’s the one day where he gets to receive after months of giving and giving. Suffocate his bank account with something hooge.
Average spend: ₦100k-₦10m.
Father’s Day cake
Source: Wilton
He’ll most likely not eat because he doesn’t like eating sugar. But make sure there’s a cake with a thoughtful message stating how special he is.
Average spend: ₦10k-₦50k.
Bottle of wine or whisky
You want to find an expensive bottle that has aged well. You can accompany this with a cute card telling daddy how much of a good parent he is.
Average spend: ₦10k-₦100k.
Customized keyholder
Source: The Laser Boutique
Daddy probably has keys for everything. The car, his office, the house and special safes. give him a customized keychain that keeps everything organized.
Average spend: ₦5k-₦20k.
Father’s Day hamper
Source: My Basket
Curate a special hamper for daddy. You can include items like: Customized journal, cufflinks, provisions, etc.
Average spend: ₦50-₦150k.
Fabric
As they grow older, Nigerian men fall in love with native wears and you’ll be sure to find a dozen or more in their wardrobes. Hit up with your fabric plug at Balogun market and spoil him silly.
Average spend: ₦20-₦150k.
Health supplements
We want to make sure daddy’s health is in good shape at all times. Make sure you check with the family doctor to know what works best for him.
Average spend: ₦50k-₦200k.
Retirement gift ideas for men
A lot of thoughts should go into selecting the best retirement gift idea for men as you’re celebrating an important milestone in his life. Whether as a wife, a child, colleague or friend, you want to give him that big pat on the back for getting to the finish line. Your gift should do the talking.
Retirement party
The company will most likely have a moderate send forth event but you want to make sure you go the extra mile. Gather friends, family and loved ones to celebrate years of service.
Average spend: ₦100k-₦500k.
Vacation
Source: Conde Nast Traveler
Probably the most important on the list, daddy should be getting some well-deserved rest after years of doing the work. We recommend an out-of-country experience, but hey, the International Institute of Tropical Agriculture (IITA) is budget friendly.
Average spend: ₦250k-₦2m.
Retirement birthday cake
Source: CakeNBake
A big 18 inches, multi-flavored, cake that comes with a message that says: “you’ve worked, it’s time to chill/play” or something sweet like that.
Average spend: ₦20k-₦50k.
Open a business
Except daddy is Dangote or Otedola, retirement in this part of the world isn’t really the end. You want to set daddy up with something that pays the bills apart from his monthly pension.
Average spend: ₦500k-₦10m.
Gift him a mansion
Source: Reuters
African parents mean their last word when they pray for their kids to buy cars and build houses for them. What better time to show daddy that prayers can be answered?
Those were dark times when you thought it was a flex to not like Nigerian music. You said it was too loud. You asked why Banky W couldn’t move like Usher, and P-Square wasn’t giving Craig David vibes. You even called that one friend who knew all 9ice’s songs his grandparents’ favourite.
Now, afrobeats has diversified and “gone global”. Rema can make Location, but can Khalid do Dumebi? Let’s tell you why it wasn’t ever a flex to diss Nigerian music.
You actually lacked taste
Style Plus was outside. Mo’Hits delivered badass club bangers back-to-back. And despite all the grass to grace experiences 2Baba gave us in his classic tapes, the beautiful guitar notes Asa strummed, you weren’t moved. Hmmm.
You were just exhibiting oversabi
You sang and danced Gangnam Style mindlessly, but didn’t think Kcee went to school when you heard “Baby, baby, go Limpopo.” Then lectured us that Limpopo is a river, not a dance. Well, Gangnam is also a district, not a dance.
Herd mentality
You did what your guys did, blindly dismissing our music for reasons you thought you knew but didn’t. Neither do we.
What everyone loved turned you off. And for how long did that work out for you?
On top of that, you were a pick-me person
No thanks to your crush who told you they only jammed to Tao Cruz and Katy Perry on 2go that year. We hope they “noticed” you sha.
ATTENTION: The hottest babes are partying at HERtitude on May 27. Get your ticket here.
They told you it was the devil’s music
In fact, you kicked against all secular music, home and abroad. You said we were going to hell. Look at you now, doing hypeman at parties for small change.
Too razz
You heard Durella for three minutes and got lost. Same way you judged Terry G for ringing bells and wearing many ‘bling-bling’ and colourful clothes. Now, you’re screaming, “It’s high fashion”.
And you didn’t have access
No phone, so you couldn’t download anything or stay updated on news and trends. When you heard Naija music was when you heard it. You just had to hate to disguise your lack of awareness.
