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Lagos | Zikoko! Lagos | Zikoko!
  • How to Avoid Wahala When Buying Land in Lagos, According to a Realtor

    This is debatable, but the most dangerous venture, apart from dodging a Nigerian mother’s slap, is investing in land — especially in Lagos. If it’s not the fear of getting scammed, it’s navigating “omo onile” and hoping you aren’t buying land in an area that’ll be demolished by the government in the future for one reason or another.

    However, land remains a valuable long-term investment option, and you can invest safely by following these tips I got from discussing with Grace Ogunlaja, the lead consultant at I-Brow Properties.

    Check for the type of land

    Not all land in Lagos is for residential purposes. Some have been earmarked for agricultural, commercial, or even mixed use. Buying a residential land and using it to produce pure water may earn you visits from the authorities, and you’ll probably lose ownership. Some lands can even be in locations under territorial dispute. You can verify the type of land at the state Ministry of Lands (or Lands Bureau). 

    Does it have a title?

    You should always confirm the land title with the land seller or real estate developer. Do NOT purchase any land without a title. 

    A title can be the Certificate of Occupancy (AKA, C of O) or Governor’s Consent. The C of O is a state-provided document demonstrating land rights to an individual; It proves ownership. Governor’s Consent is given when someone buys land that already has a C of O and wants to notify the Governor and the general public that the land has a new owner. 

    Land title differs from the deed of assignment or receipt the land seller gives after purchase. Those documents just indicate that you’ve bought something. You still need to confirm you didn’t buy stolen property, or worse, land that’s been mapped out for government purposes. Like a coastal road project, for instance.

    Run away from “freehold”

    Some real estate agents in Lagos will try to sell you land and claim it has freehold rights, meaning you own the land in perpetuity (or forever) and can use it for anything. This doesn’t exactly work because all land belongs to the government. Also, freehold isn’t exactly a land title, and chances are that the land isn’t free from government acquisition. When in doubt, always verify at the Ministry of Lands.

    Go with your own surveyor

    The seller may try to convince you that the land already has a registered survey plan approved by the State’s Surveyor General, but those can easily be falsified. You should always go with your own surveyor to pick the land coordinates and verify them at the ministry. 

    Get familiar with the authorities

    When buying land, you must verify everything with the Ministry of Lands because land issues quickly become complicated in Lagos state. If proper verification isn’t done, you risk losing your investment.

    Also, verification doesn’t end with buying the land. You also need to obtain building approval from the state government before doing anything on the land. If you build something different from what was stated on the approved building plan, the government has the right to demolish it without giving any compensation.

    Remember: The government can come for your land 

    It’s important to make peace with the fact that the government can claim land for major projects at any time, even if the owner has a C of O or Governor’s Consent. The only difference is, having the correct land titles gives the owner the right to sue the government or collect compensation. The owner has no compensation or fighting rights if it’s untitled land.


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  • Day in the Life of an IJGB in Lagos on a Food Adventure

    When Flavour sang, “Better food, na money kill am,” he knew what he was doing, and I’m sure he didn’t mean the song only in the confines of man and woman but on actual Foood! How do I know this? My father decided to bring us home again for another holiday, and being the adventurous person that I am, especially with food, I just knew that spending my Easter holiday in Nigeria couldn’t be spent indoors again, and I’m glad I made that decision. Now that I’m back in the US, I can look back and say this was the best decision I made, although it could have been better because of the unnecessary shege I experienced before finally discovering a dining reservation app ‘Reisty’ which could have been totally avoided.

    Of course, as the Explorer that I am, I explored Lagos alone at first which I immediately regretted. For a home buddy, you would almost think you are self-sufficient, too much consumption of lifestyle Instagram content made me feel like one of those creators, and so I took my phone stand, airpods and decided to venture into Lagos, totally forgetting how Lagosians took advantage of IJGBs (I just got back from the diaspora, usually for the holidays) and generally people who are new in places and embarked on a Lagos adventure. 

    As if being mugged wasn’t enough, my meals didn’t taste like they looked. Great ambiance but terrible food! But if you know me by now, I don’t give up; visions of bustling markets, vibrant nightlife, and delicious food danced in my head. The best meal I had will only get 4/10 in my books. But the resilient person in me doesn’t give up, so, we movee. 

    I went on Google and did a bunch of searches on the best restaurants in Lagos and the best reservation apps similar to opentable in Lagos (Opentable is a reservation application I use to book tables in the US) to ensure I had more than enough options. Of course, I saw a couple but something about Reisty lulled me in. I’ve always been a sucker for good-looking stuff and Reisty stood out for me. Installing the app was a breeze, I set up an account and my Reisty login was simple. Guess who saw a whole 2000 naira in their wallet? Meee! Thumbs up to Reisty for whoever came up with that genius idea.

    Perusing the restaurants was something I enjoyed doing because each restaurant profile had all the answers I needed, from menus to clear photos of the restaurant to the location and even genuine reviews from people who had visited the restaurant. The creativity of the Reisty app is one I love to experience over and over again. Lagosians, you really don’t know what this online dining reservation app has done for you until you try it.

    I tried the first restaurant with about 50% enthusiasm, because once bitten twice shy, and I’ll give them 100/100. The first restaurant I decided to try out was Mantra Lagos. I have heard a lot about this restaurant especially since I had a hidden interest in Indian culture and it looked like the perfect spot. It was so good, the ambiance, the food, and just everything was top-notch! 

    By the second restaurant, my excitement level had risen to 70% because I didn’t want to serve myself breakfast before the real breakfast. The expectation was surpassed, and now, I have 100% confidence in any restaurant on the Reisty app. 

    One thing I particularly love about Reisty is, it has no bad restaurants. Reisty had the right restaurants with great ambiance and even more fantastic food. Because of the shege I had seen, my first intention was to drag Reisty and the restaurants they had on blogs for their inconsistency, but I couldn’t because of the excellence at which everything went. The seamless location of restaurants made identifying restaurants, viewing menus, booking seats, and ordering food a breeze. 

    Restaurants are segmented based on categories, making it easy to explore restaurants that suited my vibes, from rooftops to restaurants with ocean views to Indian and many other categories

    The foodie in me has been upgraded because this adventure was top-notch. At this point, Reisty needs to employ me as their US-Nigerian ambassador because all my friends and family have downloaded the app. 

    To be very honest, whoever created the Reisty app had me in mind because my Lagos adventure went from potentially stressful to absolutely fantastic. I also got a free 2k in my Reisty wallet, so it was a win-win for me. I explored hidden corners of the city, experienced authentic Lagos culture, and, most importantly, had a blast doing it.

    To my fellow IJGBs, listen up! If you’re planning a Lagos adventure, just download the Reisty app from your app store, or playstore. You’ll definitely thank me later. Lagosians, I would also advice that you don’t sleep on this because it takes your outside game from zero to 100. Take this from a US resident. 

  • Pelumi Nubi: The 29-Year-Old Woman Driving From London to Lagos

    A year and eight months after Nigerian adventurer, Kunle Adeyanju, successfully rode from London to Lagos on a motorcycle, UK-based Nigerian, Pelumi Nubi, has been inspired to make a similar trip — this time, by car.

    She’s already visited 80 countries across six continents, so the seemingly impossible task is in capable hands. Here’s everything we know about the road trip.

    Pelumi Nubi: The 29-Year-Old Woman Driving From London to Lagos

    Photo source: Instagram/@pelumi.nubi

    Why is Pelumi embarking on this trip?

    The trip is an important one to 29-year-old Pelumi for four reasons: She loves adventure, wants to inspire other female solo travellers, especially by driving representation among black female solo adventurers, and she simply wants to show people what’s possible.

    “As a traveller, I wanted to do something quite adventurous. It was something that was in the books for me. We also don’t see a lot of solo black female travellers. It’s just like, representation matters. It’s important to see people do things and just open your minds to what’s possible. Some people don’t know it’s possible to go through London to Lagos by road,” she revealed during a podcast interview on Friday, January 19, 2024.

    But that’s not all. She was also inspired by Kunle Adeyanju’s aforementioned 2022 solo trip.

    “He did it by bike two years ago. I was on the phone with him and mentioned how it was so cool what he did.”

    How long will the trip take?

    Pelumi plans to traverse 17 countries in two months, and explore every city and country on her way. 

    Her transatlantic journey will pick up from England and take her through France, Spain, Morocco, West Sahara Desert, Mauritania, Senegal, Gambia, Guinea, Sierra Leone, Liberia, Mali, Burkina Faso, Cote d’Ivoire, Ghana, Togo, Benin, and finally, to Lagos.

    She’s expected to arrive in Lagos at the end of March.

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    When does the journey begin?

    No official announcement of a commencement date has been made, but tweets suggest the last week of January. On Wednesday, January 24, she shared a video of her car going through some modifications for the long journey ahead.

    The next day, she shared a tweet indicating that the start date is just a few days away.

    Pelumi Nubi: The 29-Year-Old Woman Driving From London to Lagos

    Her previous road trips

    Pelumi Nubi: The 29-Year-Old Woman Driving From London to Lagos

    Photo source: Instagram/@pelumi.nubi

    Prior to this trip, Pelumi has travelled by road from Lagos to Ghana twice. She’s explored Namibia for two weeks and gone on a road trip from London to Lake Como, Italy. These experiences have served as test runs for her latest and most ambitious adventure yet.

    How is she funding the trip?

    During her podcast interview, she revealed that the entire trip will cost $15,000 – $20,000, covering fuel, accommodation and other essential needs.

    A year of planning and saving up personal funds have made Pelumi’s adventure a reality. However, she still seeks support from brands looking to partner.

    Is she receiving any support?

    Pelumi Nubi: The 29-Year-Old Woman Driving From London to Lagos

    Pelumi’s trip has received attention from fellow Nigerians, travel enthusiasts and the internet community through the hashtag, #London2LagosByRoad. 

    Interest is expected to pick up once she starts making stops in the different countries and cities.

    The biggest women-only festival in Lagos is BACK.
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    This is a developing story.

    Read next: The Hilda Baci Roadmap to a 100-hour Cook-A-Thon

  • 7 Nigerians on the Craziest Things They’ve Seen in Lagos

    An X user recently asked people to share the craziest things they’ve seen in Lagos, and the video quotes had me in complete stitches. There was one driver who attempted to take a shit and throw it at LASTMA officials. And there was the road rage video that showed two drivers completely destroying their vehicles. 

    I decided to find individuals who could share narrated versions of the craziest things they’ve witnessed in the Centre of Excellence

    Jide*, 25

    I saw one of those viral videos of a LASTMA driver on the bonnet of a speeding car in real life. And it’s the craziest thing my eyes have seen since I relocated to Lagos from Osogbo. I was waiting for a bus, and a car zoomed by with a human being on the bonnet. I was too stunned for words. Thank God some people recorded because I just kept wondering who’d believe me if I gave them the gist without evidence.

    Balikis*, Late 30s

    On my way back home from work, I took a bus from Oshodi underbridge. Everything seemed normal until I noticed the conductor’s waist. This guy had several waist beads on. An old woman beside me saw it, but instead of ignoring it, she reached for his waist and tried to yank them off. The conductor didn’t appreciate the woman invading his privacy like that, so chaos ensued. There was a shouting match with a lot of cursing. The whole thing was like a movie — the male conductor who wore beads, and the overreaching granny who tried to remove them.

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    Deji*, 30

    One day in Mushin, I heard people chanting outside my house, and it was giving strong Koto-Aiye vibes. I know traditionalists carry out oro festivals in Lagos, but I’d never heard of them doing it in broad daylight. I went to the window to see what the drama was all about and nothing could’ve prepared me for what I saw: a long queue of old men and women in white wrapper, and nothing covering their chest region. Some had wooden staffs, calabash with fire, live chickens and birds, and so many other weird things. But they also had proper “rich people” vibes. They wore expensive-looking rings and necklaces. They walked on in a single file, chanting their thing. It gave me the chills.

    Ibrahim*, 35

    I visited a friend in one of these expensive estates on the island. The buildings looked nice, and my inner spirit was just screaming, “God, when?” But that was all short-lived because I got to a T-junction, and what I saw scarred me for a while: calabashes in different sizes filled with weird food combinations. It looked like a scene from a Nollywood movie. I quickly faced front and raced to my friend’s place. He laughed at me when I told him about it. Apparently, some traditionalists live in the estate.

    Bolu*, 32

    I was at a BRT bus stop when I saw this young man fall to the ground in a seizure. He looked well dressed, and I assumed he was coming from work. To my complete shock and surprise, nobody tried to approach him. Everyone just moved back and watched as the poor man writhed on the floor. I felt awful, but seeing everyone stay put forced me to do the same. This is Lagos, you might end up offering to help not knowing you’re setting yourself up for trouble. Some minutes later, the BRT bus arrived and everyone entered without tending to him. I watched from the window as the guy stood up and cleaned himself up. On the bus ride, the passengers talked about how they’d watched people scam unsuspecting victims with fake epilepsy episodes. In my head, I was just thinking, “What if it wasn’t fake?” “What if he really needed help?” “What if he died?” Lagos is the ghetto. 

    Segun*, 29

    My office was on Allen Avenue, and during the day, everywhere always looked normal. I couldn’t relate to some of the stories of sex workers I’d heard in the past. But on this fateful day, we’d closed super late because it was the last day of work for the year. I left the office around 9:30 p.m., and on my way to the bus stop, I got to this hotel and saw some ladies outside looking for customers. My first instinct was to cross to the other side of the road, but I thought, “What’s the worst that could happen?” So I just kept a straight face and walked past. I got to their midst, and they started saying, “Fine boy, you won do?” “Come chop your mama ponmo,” “You won fuck toto?” some of them even tried to pull me. It was too much. I couldn’t believe I was witnessing the Nollywood portrayals in real life.

    Hassan*, 40

    A brand was doing product activation at the market in Ojuwoye, Mushin, and they had a dance competition. This weirdly dressed person showed up out of nowhere to scare people away. Turned out he had mental illness. The market women started making a case that the brand should just allow him to participate in the dance competition. Obviously, the brand didn’t want that, and even the other contestants weren’t comfortable. But the guy refused to leave. Eventually, they made space for him, and he started dancing. He had mad moves that made it less clear he was unwell. The market people started clapping and hailing him. It was such a weird and interesting day.

  •  7 Things You Need if You Ever Want To Find True Love in Lagos

    Love is sweet. Love is kind. Love will have you wanting to share your life with a total stranger. but finding that love isn’t the easiest thing, especially when you’re doing your search in Tinubu’s Lagos. 

    So, we made a list of all the things you’ll need if you want to find your missing rib in this state.

    A praying parent

    As you enter the Lagos dating scene, you need to remember that there are many people in the streets, but not all of them are looking for love. This is why you need to have at least one religious parent that finds pleasure in climbing mountains and praying for their child on standby, so they don’t make a fool of you. 

    Connections

    You need to know people, that know people, that know people. This way, it’s easier for you to find out if that person you had a little tryst with at South is a single pringle or if they’re very much attached and are getting married this December.

    A therapist 

    The dating scene in Lagos is enough to drive you to near lunacy, so to prevent nearly all the men and women in Lagos running you mad, we suggest you have a good therapist on speed dial. It might be expensive, but prevention is better than cure.

    Money

    You can find true, sweet love without money.But Davido did say, “When money enter, love is sweeter”, soget the bag and stack your coins first because love is expensive AF.

    A sponsorship deal

    We suggest you get one with a toilet paper or handkerchief company before you become an active participant in the Lagos dating scene, because you will probably kiss a couple frogs and cry a couple times in your search for love.

    Love

    You cannot look for something if you don’t know what it looks like.So firstl, you need to have people that love you at home.Then you need to love yourself. if not, the people on these Lagos streets will use your heart to play ball.

    Prescription glasses

    If there’s one thing that’s certain, married men would step to you regardless of your sexuality . You’ll need the glasses to spot their wedding band or the tan line left behind by the aforementioned wedding band.

    To truly find love in Lagos, you’ll also need to be outside. By that we mean you need to get your Burning Ram tickets, come eat more meat than you can handle and possibly meet the love of your life.

  • QUIZ: Party in Lagos and We’ll Tell You if You Can Survive a Haunted House

    It’s the survival of the littest.

    Whether you survived the haunted house or not get your tickets and make your way to the meatiest festival on this side of the map.

  • The 10 Best Restaurants in Lagos You Must Visit

    If you’re looking to justify your lavish spending, this list has the names of the best restaurants in Lagos that will give you your money’s worth. Finding that in this city is rare, we promise.

    New restaurants pop up in Lagos everyday but many of them are just aesthetics and vibes, so we’ve done all the hard work and curated a list of the best places to eat out in Lagos. 

    With some  that scream “I have money to blow,” these Lagos restaurants should be getting your coins every day.

    Check them out in no particular order:

    Maison Kayser

    The 10 Best Restaurants in Lagos You Must Visit

    Photo: Instagram (@maisonkayser_ng)

    Nestled in the highbrow area of Ikoyi, Lagos, this restaurant comes with an offering of the best pastries you can find in the centre of excellence.

    Source: NightlifeNG

    Think of natural breads, pastries, cakes, Italian gelato & French bistro dishes and this is the top Lagos spot for pastry lovers.

    Menu: Chicken wings, Mozzarella sticks, Nachos, Chicken Fajita Sandwich, Ginger bread, Americano with whipped cream.

    Branches: Eric Kayser VI – 864A, Bishop Aboyade Cole, Victoria Island, Lagos. Eric Kayser Ikoyi – 9, Osborne Road, Ikoyi.

    Average spend: N10-15k per head.

    Perks:  Group/family friendly, take out.

    Average customer rating: 4 stars.

    Ocean5 by Riviera

    Source: Oceans5 by Riviera

    If you’re out  for some fine dining, please gather your coins and set up camp here. The world class menu here will easily transport you out of Lagos to all the beautiful countries you can think of. 

    Bonus point: You get to make your own pasta on Thursdays alongside a supervising chef.

    Best restaurant in Lagos

    Photo: Oceans5 by Riviera

    Menu: Savory steak with creamy mashed potatoes, sushi spread, peri peri chicken skewers, grilled shrimp tacos.

    Branch: 20 Elsie Femi Pearse St, Victoria Island

    Average spend: Nn15k-N20k per head.

    Perks: Family friendly, Sunday buffet, walk-ins, parking.

    Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.

    NOK by Alara

    Best restaurant in Lagos

    Source: Awe Lagos

    This Lagos restaurant continues to hold its own as one of the spots that gives you a mix of bougie and street realness. Whether you’re craving abula or want to get your hands dirty with a pot of nkwobi, it is the spot for you.

    The 10 Best Restaurants in Lagos You Must Visit

    Source: NOK by Alara

    Menu: Suya crusted steak, ewa aganyin, plantain pancakes with braised oxtail, snail bruschetta, abula,fried bean pancake with ugu, green shakshoukta, etc

    Averal spend: N10- N20k per head

    Branch: 12a Akin Olugbade Victoria Island, Lagos. 

    Perks: Walk-ins, takeout, outdoor garden, family friendly.

    Average customer rating: 4 stars.

    Ile Eros

    Best restaurant in Lagos

    Source: Bellanaija

    If you’re in need of authentic Nigerian food with a modern twist, Ile Eros is the spot to be.

    Chef Eros has a specially curated menu that makes you see your regular Naija staples in a new light. You know what’s even more interesting about this restaurant? They now have a branch in Los Angeles for our diaspora brothers and sisters.

    The 10 Best Restaurants in Lagos You Must Visit

    Source: The quick finder

    Menu: Dambu nama roll, sticky yaji wings, habanero zobo wings, jollof adugan, abula, turkey fried rice, smoked chicken yaji pasta, ayamase, etc.

    Branch: 14 Kafayat Abdulrasaq Street, Lekki.

    Average spend: N15k- N20k per head.

    Perks: Fine-dining, takeout, group friendly.

    Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.

    Z Kitchen

    Source: ZKitchen

    The ‘kitchen’ might scare you into thinking you’re getting regular homemade meals but that is so not true. Z Kitchen easily ranks among the best restaurants in Lagos and you’ll know why when you pay them a visit.

    Source: Zkitchen

    Menu: Salmon platter, cheese platter, feta bake dip, trufle and cheese roll, eggplant bravas, buttermilk chicken and biscuits, crispy prawn rolls, prawn cocktail, beef sliders, etc

    Average spend: N20k-N30k per head.

    Branch: 19 Saka Tinubu St, Victoria Island 106104, Lagos.

    Perks: Dine-in, takeout, group friendly, smoking patio, bar.

    Average customer rating: 4.5 stars

    Turaka Lagos

    The 10 Best Restaurants in Lagos You Must Visit

    Source: Awe Lagos

    Owned by media mogul, Mo Abudu of Ebonylife, this Lagos restaurant is a casual rooftop spot that offers you a generous view of the city. Definitely a spot to visit if you’re planning a picturesque proposal.

    Source: Instagram (@turakalagos)

    Menu: Beer batter fish, sticky pork ribs, Nigerian pepper soup, spicy seafood, vegetable panini, Turaka burger.

    Branch: 1637 Adetokunbo Ademola Street, Victoria Island.

    Average spend: N20-N25k.

    Perks: Takeout, dine-in, comedy specials, rooftop view, delivery.

    Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.

    Shiro

    Are you even a Lagos big boy/girl if Shiro hasn’t gotten your coins? Nestled within the popular Landmark centre, the offerings at this Pan-Asian restaurant takes your taste buds on a trip you won’t forget in a while.

    Source: TripAdvisor

    Menu: Cantonese chicken wanton, thai kwai seafood, crunchy gomae, sambal chicken salad, edamame, fiery grilled salmon, prawn in xo sauce, wasabi prawns, etc

    Branch: Block XVI 3 & 4 Victoria Island Oniru Estate, Eti-Osa.

    Average spend: N15- N25k per head.

    Perks: Fine dining, dine-in, Sunday buffet, event friendly.

    Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.

    Ofada Boy

    The 10 Best Restaurants in Lagos You Must Visit

    Source: Eat. Drink. Lagos

    Think of Ofada boy as the king of the mainland. Food lovers have a love-love relationship with this restaurant because of the authentic African offerings and affordable prices. Easily one of the best restaurants in Lagos, Ofada Boy will feed you on a N5k budget.

    The 10 Best Restaurants in Lagos You Must Visit

    Source: TripAdvisor

    Menu: Ofada rice, village mixed ofada, seafood ofada rice, ofada kingdom, native soup, fisherman soup, jedi on the rocks, etc.

    Branch: 1 Mba St, Surulere, Lagos Surulere

    Perks: Private dining, family friendly, takeout, local cuisine.

    Average spend: N5k-15k

    Average customer rating: 4 stars.

    RSVP Lagos

    Source: TripAdvisor

    If you want a feel of the USA in Lagos, this is the restaurant for you. Everything from the architecture and interior designs screams class. Definitely a place to come if you want to impress bae. Please, hold your bar.

    Source: TripAdvisor

    Menu: Spicy hummus, crab tacos, chicken skewers, spicy tuna maki, prawn summer roll, BBQ pork sandwich, sea bass, jumbo prawns, chicken katsu curry, etc.

    Branch: 9 Eletu Ogabi St, Victoria Island 101001, Lagos

    Average spend: N20k-N30k.

    Perks: Dine-in, poolside bar, group friendly, private events.

    Average customer rating: 4.5 stars.

    Cactus 

    Source: TripAdvisor

    Cactus Lagos is another notable mention, and we promise, this isn’t mere word of mouth. Whether you’re looking to catch breakfast, lunch, dinner or intercontinental dishes, you’ll find that there’s a place for you.

    Source: Travel Waka

    Menu: Avocado bruschetta, crispy calamari, 9ja bites, cobb salad, norge salad, Cuban steak sandwich, teriyaki noodles, etc.

    Branch: 20/24 Ozumba Mbadiwe Ave, Victoria Island.

    Average spend: N15k-N30k.

    Perks: Group/family friendly, dine-in, takeout, private events.

    Average customer rating: 4 stars.

    Join the gorgeous gorgeous babes in Lagos for the hottest women-only party of the year. Grab your HERtitude tickets here.

  • These 7 Tips Will Help You Survive Lagos Danfo Buses

    Are you even a real Lagosian if you don’t jump buses every ten market days? Use these seven tips to stay on guard when you board a Lagos danfo.

    Lagos danfo.

    ATTENTION: Eko’s hottest babes are cruising in style to HERtitude 2023 on May 27th. Grab your tickets here to join the bus.

    Always make a quick survey before you hop in

    Seeing a Lagos danfo bus

    Is there a right mix of men and women? Where are they seated? Hard face or soft? These are the questions.

    Avoid the front row

    Running from Lagos danfo bus

    It’s always tight, hot, and you’re completely shut out from everything that’s happening inside the bus. The middle bench is the sweet spot.

    Take pictures and videos

    We know you can’t share your Lagos danfo ride details, but you want to put in the extra measure by taking short recordings of the driver, conductor and co-passengers. If they catch you, you’re on your own sha.

    Don’t press your phone if you chose a window seat

    That’s an open invitation to traffic robbers. After taking the security videos, your phone should be safely tucked in your bag.

    Please, don’t sleep

    We know you’ve had a long day, and the traffic isn’t helping matters. But please dear, don’t sleep. You could miss your stop, or God forbid, become prey to evil co-passengers.

    Don’t take sensitive calls

    You don’t know your co-passengers, so it’s just not wise to take business/work calls on the bus. Wait till you get home.

    Mind your business

    There’s nothing bad about socialising, but please, focus on your destination. The gist might be a ploy to get you distracted before stealing your soul or kidney.

    The hottest babes in Lagos will be gathering at the hottest women-only party on May 27th. Grab your ticket to HERtitude2023 here!

  • Interview With Lagos Beaches: “Stop Acting Like You Can’t Afford Us” 

    Zikoko walks into a cabana with loud music booming from the speakers and a hype man standing in a corner. She’s led through the back to what can only be described as paradise. 

    Zikoko: Okay, what is this?

    Oniru Beach: It’s a private residence of some sort.

    Zikoko: It’s shiny.

    Landmark Beach: [turns to Elegushi Beach] See? Told you a little sweeping and dusting is all you need.

    Elegushi Beach: [mimics Landmark].

    Zikoko: As much as I love this free day with you lot. 

    [Under her breath] 

    Because God knows it would’ve taken my entire salary to come on my own.

    [Out loud] 

    Can we start this, so I can leave early and not sleep in the traffic Landmark has piling on from the gate?

    Elegushi Beach: [chuckles]

    Zikoko: No offense, but you’re not better.

    Oniru Beach: [snickers]

    Zikoko: Actually, you’re all birds of the same feather. 

    [points at Elegushi Beach]

    You don’t know how to say no to people, so everyone’s always at yours making a mess.

    [points at Landmark Beach]

    You keep hosting parties and causing roadblocks. People might as well make reservations before visiting. You’ve basically become an Island restaurant.

    Landmark Beach: I take exception to that.

    Elegushi Beach: Ehn?! There’s one restaurant over there.

    [He points left]

    There 

    [He points right] 

    and there 

    [He points behind him] 

    Oniru Beach: Don’t you have restaurants too?

    Elegushi Beach: Not as much as him.

    Landmark Beach: So it’s just jealousy.

    Zikoko: Okay, pause. Why is that even a thing?

    Oniru Beach: What?

    Zikoko: The endless restaurants. A beach is supposed to be for peace, relaxation, a little quiet time before you return to the “Hope this meets you well” emails. But there are bars, clubs and restaurants on every beach in Lagos. Also, how many of you am I actually interviewing? 

    [Zikoko digs into her bag]

    Landmark Beach: You don’t want to eat at the beach? See, all the restaurants, bars and clubs you’re complaining about is not for us o. It’s for you.

    Zikoko: Okay, but Lagosians are saying they don’t want…

    Landmark Beach: No, Lagosians are not saying they don’t want. They’re saying they pay too much for them.

    Zikoko: So you guys know it’s too much money?

    Oniru Beach: I don’t think it’s too much. In fact, for all the white sand and blue water we provide, they need to pay more.

    Zikoko: [Shakes head] There’s no blue water, the sand isn’t that white, and they’re already paying for everything else. Including chair to sit on.

    Oniru Beach: That’s not true

    Landmark and Elegushi Beach: [shake head]

    Zikoko: They pay to park, enter, sit, drink, eat…

    Elegushi Beach: No. They can bring whatever they want to eat.

    Zikoko: Not in the new ones, they can’t.

    Elegushi Beach: Which new ones? Ehn, they should not go to those ones now. 

    Zikoko: They’re nicer.

    Oniru Beach: So why are you not interviewing them?

    Zikoko: Because you people didn’t bring them.

    Landmark Beach: Technically, I’m a new one.

    Zikoko: Landmark, no offense, but we’ve seen you finish. You don’t count.

    Oniru and Elegushi Beaches: [laugh]

    Oniru Beach: Help us tell him.

    Zikoko: I’m not on anyone’s side.

    Elegushi Beach: See. There are over 30 of us, so I really think you should tell Lagosians to pick the one they like and be going there. 

    Zikoko: Okay, I understand what you’re saying. But that doesn’t change the fact that you all want to finish Lagosians with billing.

    Landmark Beach: That’s a heavy accusation.

    Oniru Beach: Exactly, we aren’t forcing anybody to come to us. It’s a choice they have to make.

    Zikoko: Some people like the peace and relaxation the water gives.

    Elegushi Beach: Like mami wata?

    Zikoko: No, the water is supposed to be calming.

    Oniru Beach: Ehn, they should pour water inside a glass and be looking at it. This is Lagos. Nothing goes for nothing, and we, the beaches in charge, have set our price.

    Elegushi Beach: It’s not like we’re even asking for plenty money, just ₦2k here.

    Oniru Beach: ₦5k there.

    Landmark Beach: Sometimes, it might be small ₦10k. 

    Zikoko: ₦10k is not small o.

    Oniru Beach: How is ₦10k small? I’m with Zikoko on this one.

    Elegushi Beach: Count to ten with your fingers. Isn’t it plenty?

    Landmark Beach: But Twitter people said…

    Zikoko: [Lays back in her lounge chair]

    Oniru Beach: What’re you doing?

    Zikoko: Enjoying my free day at the beach. 

    [Pulls a headset out of her bag]

    You can continue arguing about who’s the most expensive.

  • How Britain Bought Lagos with Blood and £1,000

    If you asked a Nigerian in the 15th to 19th centuries to describe their version of “oil money”, two words come to mind — slave trade.

    British traders were at the heart of the slave trade before the UK government abolished the trade [BBC/Getty Images].

    Popularly known as the Transatlantic Slave Trade or Euro-American slave trade, this involved selling enslaved Africans to the Americas and Europe, usually by other Africans. 

    The first slave traders in Nigeria were Portuguese, who sold over 3.5 million Nigerians to the Americas and the Caribbean, primarily as cotton plantation workers. More than a million died from disease and starvation during the voyages. 

    Captive Africans being transferred to ships along the Slave Coast for the transatlantic slave trade, c. 1880. [Photos.com/Getty Images]

    Despite these deaths, these amounted to exponential economic growth for the nations involved. 

    The USA grew to provide 60% of the world’s cotton and some 70% of the cotton consumed by the British textile industry. 

    Profits made in the slave trade provided money for investment in British industry, with banks and insurance companies offering services to slave merchants. 

    Local chiefs enriched themselves with guns, mirrors, and other profitable income due to the trade-offs with these Western powers. 

    All this happened until the abolition of the slave trade in 1807 with the Slave Trade Act by William Wilberforce.

    The official medallion of the British Anti-slavery Society [Wikimedia Commons]

    Once slavery was abolished, Britain needed a legitimate means of exploiting resources conducting business. One of the largest slave ports came to mind — Lagos.

    This is where the story of Oba Akintoye and Prince Kosoko comes to light.

    The Akintoye-Kosoko power tussle 

    Obas Akintoye and Kosoko.

    After abolishment, slavery didn’t just disappear from Africa until 1852, especially in coastal places like Lagos.

    Trading at that point was so bad that the British Royal Navy had to establish a Task Force called the West Africa Squadron to pursue Portuguese, American and French slave ships and prevent local chiefs from selling more people.

    This affected local politics as some chiefs and kings wanted to keep trading, while some thought quitting was reasonable.

    A West Africa Squadron ship, HMS Black Joke fires on the Spanish Slaver, El Almirante [HistoryUK].

    In 1841, Oba Oluwole of Lagos died from a gunpowder explosion triggered by lightning. This left a vacancy on the throne that was contested between Prince Kosoko, the rightful heir, and his uncle, Prince Akintoye.

    Prince Kosoko was pro-slave-trade, making him popular with the chiefs and slave traders. However, Akintoye was a populist, a friend to the British and anti-slave trade, which made him unpopular with the local leaders.

    With these factors against Akintoye, it was easy for Kosoko to establish a coup against Akintoye and oust him from the throne into exile in 1845. With Kosoko’s ascension to power, the slave trade heightened. Lagosians became domestic slaves or chattel slaves for export. 

    Kosoko grew in wealth, with the ability to purchase guns, velvet robes, umbrellas, gunpowder and other valuable items from the proceeds of the slave trade. 

    With all this going on, Lagos looked more like a lost cause for the British anti-slave trade movement despite negotiations with Kosoko, and they didn’t like this. 

    They sought counsel on their next steps from a formerly enslaved person and first Black Bishop, Samuel Ajayi Crowther.

    The Revenge of Bishop Samuel Ajayi [Adjai] Crowther

    Bishop Samuel Ajayi Crowther [Guardian Nigeria]

    Samuel Ajayi [Adjai] Crowther is a familiar name in Nigerian history. 

    Many of us know him as a child from Osogun sold into slavery at 13 and traded several times before being rescued by the Royal Navy West African Squadron in Sierra Leone. 

    We also know him as the first Black Anglican Bishop and the first person to translate the Bible from English to Yoruba. 

    How was he then involved in the Lagos tussle? 

    Samuel Ajayi Crowther, 1890 [Slavery Images]

    Eight years after being admitted to the ministry as a priest by the Bishop of London, Crowther was received by Queen Victoria and Prince Albert in November 1851.

    Both the Queen and the Prince studied a map showing Lagos and Abeokuta and displayed great interest in the country’s trade. Ajayi described his enslavement and the state of slavery in Lagos at the time. 

    When Queen Victoria asked what the solution could be for slavery on the West African coast, Ajayi replied, “Seize Lagos by fire and by force”. He also argued that if Lagos were under Akitoye instead of Kosoko, the British commercial interest would be guaranteed and the slave trade suppressed.

    On November 20, 1851, a team consisting of the British consul in Lagos, Lord Beecroft, and other officers negotiated with Prince Kosoko one last time to end the slave trade, but he refused. 

    And with that, Beecroft sent the word to the senior officer of the Bights Division, Commander Forbes, to expel Kosoko and wage war on Lagos.  

    Preparation for war 

    “British Men o’ War Attacked by the King of Lagos” [James George Philip, 1851]

    One month later, in December 1851, the British Naval Forces travelled to Lagos for warfare. 

    On the part of the Lagosians, they had two concerns — the safety of their gunpowder, which was essential for fighting, and the effectiveness of the artillery forces, which were cannons, rockets and muskets. 

    For the British, their problems lay with the lagoon’s shallow waters. This made movement more difficult for their larger warships (HMS Penelope and Samson). Therefore, they had to make do with the smaller warships, HMS Bloodhound and Taser. 

    You will enjoy this story about the Ekumeku War: How Igbo Vigilantes Resisted Britain for 31 Years

    This was good news for the Lagos Army Commander, Oshodi Tapa. The Lagosians would not have been able to withstand 32-calibre cannons firing at them per minute. But that didn’t mean they were going to take chances. 

    Obituary poster for war chief, Oshodi Tapa [Sahara Weekly]

    Two rows of spiked coconut tree stems were placed underwater as an engineering technique to prevent the big warships from moving towards the shore. Then they placed long cannons on piles above sea level. 

    Now, the Lagosians were ready for the British. 

    A bloody Christmas 

    1851 Bombardment of Lagos by the British Naval Forces [Guardian Nigeria]

    On December 25, 1851, Oshodi Tapa attacked British ships that had gathered at the ports for weeks in disguise of a truce. Tapa planned to lure them into the traps they had set as soon as possible.

    The British fleet, which had 306 soldiers under Commander Forbes, sailed inward the following morning, and the Lagosians fled.

    However, this was a decoy, as the British were ambushed by Lagosians who murdered one officer and 13 soldiers and wounded four officers and 60 soldiers, including Lieutenant Corbett. They also captured one of their warships. 

    But the British retaliated 

    The Royal Navy were furious with the battle’s outcome and retaliated on December 27, 1851. They decided to go the route of an artillery storm because they knew they’d lose with infantry combat. 

    Captain Jones led the attack party consisting of HMS Bloodhound, HMS Teaser, and a flotilla of boats, including The Victoria and The Harlequin, equipped with overwhelming firepower.

    They engaged Kosoko’s army in a battle lasting three days. Kosoko put up a stiff resistance, but the Royal Navy’s superior firepower won the day. Kosoko and his leading chiefs fled Lagos for Epe on December 28, 1851.

    The aftermath

    A group of Lagosians managed to escape the blaze of the war and ran to the city’s northern outskirts. 

    They created a community called Agindigbi, which signifies the deafening sound of the cannons. This still exists as an area in the now Ikeja part of Lagos.

    Modern day Agindigbi in Ikeja [PropertyPro]

    The British chased away the remaining indigenes to spread the word upon arrival. 

    They found 48 letters in Kosoko’s palace corresponding with Kosoko and European slave traders. These can now be found in the British National Archives. 

    On December 29, the British installed Oba Akintoye as the Oba of Lagos. After Akintoye’s death on September 2, 1853, his son, Dosunmu, succeeded him as king. 

    King Dosunmu, King of Lagos [Alubarika]

    Under Dosunmu, the slave trade was revived briefly until the British convinced him to exchange the ports of Lagos for a yearly pension of 1,200 cowries (equivalent to £1,000). This was known as the Treaty of Cession in 1861. 

    From then on, Lagos was annexed to become a colony under the British.

    The impact 

    An aerial view of CMS in modern-day Lagos [Council on Foreign Relations]

    Britain’s conquest of  Lagos and its commercial activities made Lagos an economic hub. By 1872, Lagos was a cosmopolitan trading centre with a population over 60,000

    Since then, it has become one of the largest cities in West Africa, with an estimated metropolitan population of over 15.9 million people in 2023. Lagos is also the most profitable state in Nigeria, with a $136.6 billion GDP

  • Constituencies to Look Out for at the Lagos State House of Assembly Elections

    The gubernatorial and state House of Assembly elections are almost upon us. In less than one day, on March 18, 2023, voters will determine whether to reward some politicians with another four years or give way to a new administration. 

    For Lagosians, the state elections are particularly interesting due to the upset previously caused by the Labour Party (LP) during the presidential elections on February 25, 2023. 

    For example, although Lagos was supposedly a stronghold of the All Progressives Congress (APC) presidential candidate and now president-elect Bola Tinubu, he lost the state to the LP presidential candidate, Peter Obi. The LP also won the House of Representatives seats in the Eti-Osa, Amuwo-Odofin and Oshodi-Isolo II federal constituencies.   

    Therefore, it won’t be surprising if we get shocking results at the polls. So, here are five constituencies to watch out for on March 18. 

    Surulere I

    The current representative for the Surulere Constituency I is a Nollywood actor turned politician, Desmond Elliot. He’s a member of the APC and has been in an endless battle with the Gen-Zs since his comments during the #EndSars protests.

    A significant threat to his re-election is the LP candidate, Olumide Owuru, a Nollywood actor and a political greenhorn. To get on the good side of the electorate, the APC candidate has stepped up his game from gifting his constituents wooden bridges to providing them with brand-new transformers

    If we had elections every year, Nigeria would become more developed than Japan.

    Eti-Osa II

    The Eti-Osa Federal Constituency made the news in the last general elections on February 25, when the LP candidate, Thaddeus Attah, defeated PDP candidate Bankole Wellington, who was expected to win. 

    The incumbent representative for the Eti-Osa Constituency II in the State House of Assembly is Gbolahan Yishawu of the APC. But should we expect another upset from this constituency by the LP candidate, Fangnon Gbemi, on March 18? 

    Ikorodu II

    The APC candidate for this constituency is Abiodun Moshood, who was formerly a member of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP). After winning the APC primaries, Hon. Olarenwaju Oshin, Chairman of the PDP Local Council Development Area (LCDA) in Ikorodu, alleged that Abiodun was still a member of the PDP. 

    State House of Assembly Elections Lagos

    A case was filed in court against the APC aspirant, but it was dismissed on the grounds of no evidence. The odds favour Abiodun winning the State Assembly elections for the forthcoming elections. 

    Amuwo Odofin I

    The PDP has been facing trying times in the Lagos State House of Assembly. In 2019, the last PDP member in the house, Dipo Olorunrinu representing Amuwo Odofin Constituency, defected to the APC. 

    State House of Assembly Elections Lagos

    This year, the PDP can take back this constituency with their candidate, Davies Alaba Emmanuel. However, it would take a miracle to defeat the APC candidate, Foloruso Olaitan. 

    Oshodi/Isolo II

    The Eti-Osa federal constituency wasn’t the only one that shocked Lagosians with its results. The same thing was witnessed in the Oshodi/Isolo constituency when APC’s Prince Lanre Sanusi lost over 33,000 votes to LP’s George Adegeye

    Will the LP candidate for the State Assembly, Obanufin Shehu, continue the party’s winning streak in the constituency, or will he lose the seat to APC’s Ajomale Oluyinka? 

    Also read: Navigating Nigeria: Five Interesting Governorship Elections This Weekend

    We’ll be bringing you live election coverage and fact-checks of the state elections around the country. You can get live updates and follow election results using this page.

  • QUIZ: Which Lagos Neighbourhood Are You?

    Does your energy give off Mushin or Ikorodu vibes? Find out on this quiz.

  • Stay in Lagos: Houses in These 6 Areas Are No Less Expensive

    I heard people are complaining, yet again, about the criminal rent prices in Lagos.

    Even if you’re lucky to find a reasonably priced apartment, give it a year, and inflation will greet you in typical fashion.

    But if you want to run away from Lagos because of rent prices, avoid a case of “from frying pan to fire” by crossing these places off your list.

    “Abuja is no better”

    — Debby, 35

    I thought Lagos was bad till I moved to Abuja in early 2022. I only looked for apartments in what we’d call the “suburbs”, like Kubwa and Lugbe. Tell me why I was hearing ₦1.7m to ₦1.8m for two-bedroom apartments?

    “They’ve moved Lagos craze to Ibadan”

    — Torera, 28

    Gone are the days when people move to Ibadan because they can’t afford Lagos. If you have a certain standard of living and want a decent one-bedroom mini flat in places like Bodija, just hold like ₦1m, minus agent fees.

    “Port Harcourt is also pricey”

    — Odi, 27

    Renting here is also pricey, especially well-known residential estates or GRAs like Eliozu, Woji and the like. Two-bedroom apartments in these areas can cost as much as ₦900k – ₦1.2m per annum, but it’d most likely be a new building and really standard.

    “The agents in Ado-Ekiti are in a weird competition”

    — Ope, 33

    I moved here in 2019 when you could still find standard three-bedroom apartments for between ₦200k to ₦250k. Now, you may need to budget around ₦400k if you want a new two-bedroom apartment with basic amenities, especially around areas close to the tertiary institutions. The prices may not be as bad as Lagos, but the business prospects in Ekiti are next to nothing, so it doesn’t make sense.

    Then there are the agents who love to increase rent every year, as if they’re chasing them. 

    “The popular areas in Ilorin cost more”

    — Adetola, 30

    Rent is quite reasonable in Ilorin, except if you’re looking in places like Tanke or the GRA. GRA is the best area in Ilorin, and you can get a two-bedroom apartment for around ₦400k – ₦550k per annum. It’s not as much as what it’d cost in Lagos, but it can also be ridiculous, considering it’s much lesser in the inner towns.


    RELATED: 8 Signs You Are About to Rent a Useless House in Ilorin


    “You won’t even see what you’re paying for in Abeokuta”

    — Dara, 25

    You can get a one-bedroom apartment at around ₦400k in Oke-Mosan — which is one of the nicer neighbourhoods in the city — but my problem is you won’t even see what you’re paying for. It’s either the road is bad, the landlord wakes up and decides to increase the rent or light becomes an issue.


    NEXT READ: 5 Nigerians Talk About Their Struggle With Raising Rent

  • Dear Lagos, We Need These 9 Venues ASAP

    Every five minutes, a new restaurant or club opens in Lagos. It’s enough, abeg. How many food man wan chop? We need other options for places to go and things to do. So Lagos, please, give us these things in 2023.

    Botanical gardens 

    Instead of yet another park that’ll be neglected, Lagos should give us a botanical garden. I don’t care where they want to get the money from, but they should do it. See, everyone who’s planning to open a restaurant or club this year should come together and combine their money to give us a big, beautiful botanic garden, like the one in Capetown.

    A rage room

    Image credit: Web Urbanist

    Lagosians are always angry and transferring aggression because we have no way of releasing the anger. Give us one or two rage rooms where we can vent and maybe everyone would be a little bit happier. 

    Another arcade

    Image credit: KSNV

    Lagos is too populated for there to be just two proper arcades. It’s not every time people want to eat fancy tasteless food. Sometimes, they want to play Pac-Man or Whac-a-Mole, but they can’t, because there’s no arcade nearby. 

    ALSO READ: 6 Nigerians Talk About How Much It Costs To Live In Lagos

    A free beach

    Image credit: Planet Ware

    Instead of making us pay to sit down, it’ll be better for Lagos beach owners to carry guns and rob us directly. We need new beaches in Lagos that don’t charge us for every little thing and have more to offer than expensive alcohol and overpriced food. 

    An amusement park

    Image credit: Coasterpedia

    The  good amusement park we have in Lagos is situated in Ibeju-Lekki, practically Ogun state if we’re being honest. And it doesn’t have a lot of interesting rides that make your heart enter your mouth. We deserve a proper amusement park where people can go and play like children, scream and release adrenaline. And please, let it not have some outrageous fee. 

    VR reality rooms

    Image credit: Slaylebrity

    We need more VR places in Lagos. Partying and drinking aren’t the only escapes from reality. People would pay good money to temporarily escape the constraints of the real world to a world where nothing is impossible.  Lagos, please, do better.  

    Selfie museums 

    Image credit: Statesman.com

    A selfie museum is a picture lover (and influencer)’s dream. A place with perfect lighting, backdrops, themed sections, props, etc., where people can take perfect pictures and videos. Content creators will finish their money in this place, and others will go just for the fun of taking nice photos. We need one in Lagos ASAP.

    Skydiving and bungee jumping spots

    Image credit: The Guardian Nigeria

    The only problem is Nigerians may not go to a bungee jumping spot in Lagos because they’ll use cheap ropes that’ll cut and kill them. But it’s a euphoria-inducing type of fun, and Lagos people love anything that can make them feel “high”.

    Zoo

    Image credit: Touropia

    In this big Lagos, how do we not have a Zoo? I’m not talking about all those mini zoos with starving animals. Imagine a big ass one with a variety of animals, an aquarium, a park for picnics, play areas, gift shops, etc. We deserve better than a conservation centre with five monkeys. 

    ALSO READ: 5 Times Living in Lagos Will Humble You

  • How Did Abuja Become the Capital of Nigeria?

    Many people know Abuja as Nigeria’s capital city, but not everyone knows how this happened and why it happened. 

    Let’s take a trip down memory lane.

    Why the change in capital?

    Lagos has always been the commercial hub of Nigeria, especially due to its close proximity to the Atlantic Ocean. This was useful for slave masters in the slave trade era and later on, as a means to transport the nation’s resources for profit in the colonial era.

    Business in Lagos grew so big that it later became Nigeria’s capital during independence in 1960. But there was a problem. This commercialisation started to affect residents, as there was a population boom in the 1970s and 1980s which affected access to basic amenities like light and water.

    Coupled with fears of Lagos as a potential security risk due to the Nigerian Civil War, General Muritala Mohammed decided in 1975 to set up a panel to study whether or not Lagos could hold its dual position as a federal and state capital. The resolution was to move the Federal Capital Territory out of Lagos and into Abuja. This brings us to the next question. 

    Why was Abuja picked as the new capital?

    The answer is simple — because of its position on the Nigerian map. 

    Located in the centre of the nation, Abuja was seen as a neutral point for the diverse religious and ethnic groups that made up Nigeria. It was also seen as an accessible location to all Nigerians, regardless of their origin.

    How was Abuja built?

    While preparing to build Abuja, Nigeria studied other major capitals for inspiration on how to plan the city. Examples of such cities were Brasilia, the capital of Brazil; Paris, the capital of France; Islamabad, the capital of Pakistan; and Washington D.C., the capital of United States of America.

    A combination of five American firms made the blueprint for Nigeria’s capital: Planning Research Corporation, Wallace, McHarg, Roberts and Todd, and Archisystems. They were collectively known as the International Planning Associates (IPA). 

    Construction work started in the 1980s. At the end of that period, there was a functional water and telephone system to cater to one million people. Hospitals were built and a university was established in 1988. By the close of the decade, many people were flocking to what was being dubbed the Center of Unity. 

    On December 12, 1991, General Ibrahim Babangida made it official and crowned Abuja as the new capital of Nigeria.

    But what happened to the native residents?

    Abuja wasn’t just some deserted grassland before 1991. The area was inhabited by ethnic groups like the Gbagyi, Koro, Gade, and Gwandara. These groups had lived on the lands for over 4,000 years. The relocation of the capital from Lagos displaced these natives. Their primary means of livelihood — farming — were affected by the construction work. 

    There were over 800 villages in the location over which the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) was built according to Al Jazeera. The government created committees to oversee the relocation process and provide compensation for affected natives. When indigenes didn’t move as fast as expected, the government considered relocating them involuntarily and pushing them to the new capital’s fringes.

    Should the move have happened? 

    While many Nigerians would agree that transportation and road networking is far more favourable in the FCT, Lagos generates by far more revenue. Lagos is also often considered to be the state with more great job opportunities. This is quite unlike Abuja. There, people often claim you need to have connections in government parastatals in order to get jobs.

    However, in terms of security and cost of living, it seems that the Federal Government made a good choice. Lagos’ crime rate is currently 71.6% while Abuja is 61.03%. Lagos is also a more expensive city than Abuja, ranking No. 55 in the 2022 Mercer Cost of Living Survey while Abuja is 147.

  • Experiencing Benin City As a Babe Who Grew Up in Lagos

    As I prepare to write my final exams, I reminisce on my time shuttling between Lagos and Benin city the last five years. Even though I’m from Edo state, I was born and raised in Lagos, so living in Benin was a chance to connect with my people. However, as much as I like to deny it, I’m a Lagos babe through and through. I like the hustle and bustle that comes with Lagos. As much as I complain about the traffic, a traffic free life scares me. I love 

    The culture shock I first experienced in my first year in 2018 hasn’t ended since. If you’re a Lagos babe like me and you want to know what to prepare for if you ever have to come to Benin city, first of all, never wear white shoes out. Benin and red sand are like Lagos and traffic — joined together, never to depart from one another. Your shoes will change to shades of red and orange, and you’ll hate yourself and the person who brought you to Benin. 

    Of course, not everywhere in Benin is covered in red sand, but most of it is. Especially the places that require you to walk. That brings me to my second culture shock. There are parts of Benin where you forget that okadas exist. In Lagos, I’ve watched various governors try and fail to ban bikes. They bring their little task forces and impound lots of people’s okadas, but one week later, they are back on the road. 

    My cousin told me there were no bikes in Benin, and I thought she was joking. When Oshiomole decided to ban them, he banned them for real. Lagos state governors should come and learn work from him. Edo state has mostly expressways and bikes are a big no-no except within specific streets. Even then, it’ll take a while to find one. If we’re being honest, finding anything in Benin city will take a while. The early morning grind culture I grew up with in Lagos? Non-existent in Benin city.

    Benin people do not like to stress. They do things at their own pace, especially if those things are running a business. You go to a shop to buy something, and the owner sits while you attend to yourself. If you finish and don’t have the exact change, they can’t be arsed. Get out. I’m used to sellers in Lagos offering to at least find change for me. I can’t forget when a woman shouted at me for trying to buy a sachet of milk with ₦200, like I’d committed a crime. I had to return to my streets milkless and annoyed. It was even worse because I had to walk a long while to find a shop open by 8:30 a.m. on a weekday. They open their shops late and close them early. Do you want to order a Bolt by 7 a.m.? Better use that time to fill up your water bottle and start trekking. Anything that relates to stress? Benin people can’t take it. They don’t care if you’re paying them. Their gist, their peace, their rest come first. 

    If these business owners eventually answer you, language might be a barrier. If you’re like me and don’t speak Benin fluently, I’ll advise you to brush up on your pidgin. The pidgin they speak here is unlike the one they speak in Lagos. Dem fit use am sell you for your front, and you go just dey shine teeth. Your 32 go dey sparkle but dem don call price for your head. Better go and hire a pidgin lesson teacher. Make e no be like say I no warn you before. At least, if you narrate your story give another person, you go include say I warn you. If you no include am, the thunder wey go fire you dey warm up for Oba palace. Dem no dey talk too much give wise man. 

    RELATED: Dating in Benin on a ₦400k Income

    If you get the language part down and have to deal with the business owners behaving anyhow, you might feel tempted to interfere. You might want to raise your shoulder and shout at them to prove a point because you’re now a superstar, shey? The insults they’ll rain on you will humble you. I’ve not met a group of people with a worse mouth than Benin people. They curse you to say hello, and if you complain, you chop some more. 

    Last week, I offered to do something for my roommate, and she ignored me. I told her, “I don’t blame you; it’s me that wanted to do good.” Tell me why one of my Benin roommates replied, “Instead of the good you want to do to kill you, it will kill the person you wanted to do it for.” The scream I let out could’ve been heard from the gate. What did I start? What did she finish? And she said it so casually, like it was an everyday phrase. After the initial shock wore off, I added it to my dictionary. Benin has taught me a lot of interesting and colourful statements. When I unleash them in Lagos, they’ll gather and beat me. 

    Benin isn’t all bad. I think my favourite thing about the place is the electricity timetable. Every street has a particular time they “bring light”, which is helpful to plan your day. If they bring your light by 6 a.m., you know it’s there till 9 a.m. Anything you want to do should be done by then. When they take it, it’s till 12 p.m. It’s very consistent; they hardly bring light when it’s not yet your turn. Unfortunately, when rain falls, it can take two to three business days for the wire to dry, and in that period, nothing for you. Just zukwanike. Rest. 

    Benin is for people tired of the hustle and bustle of places like Lagos. Rent is not as expensive, but that’s rapidly changing. With the rate at which fraudsters are pumping money into the shortlet apartment industry in Benin, if you want to come, come fast. 

    There’s a lot of time to just relax and take it easy. If you enjoy a vibrant nightlife, omo, nothing for you. Except you don’t mind peppersoup and beer joints. That one, Benin has in abundance. You’ll eat grasscutter so much you’ll start growing it on your head. If you’re trying to find clubs, whatever they show you there, better close your eyes and collect it. Lounges? Same thing. Whatever you use your eye to see, your mouth might be unable to say. 

    The people who were born here or moved willingly don’t have a bad thing to say about Benin city. If they could, they’d choose to be born here over and over again. Me, on the other hand? I’m dipping the first chance I get. 

    RELATED: 9 Things You HAVE to Know if You Are Leaving Benin to Lagos

  • How This Tech Bro Got Swindled by His Landlord

    For this week’s episode of Navigating Nigeria, we spoke to Mark*, an IT and networking specialist who is dealing with a huge electricity bill after being swindled by his landlord.

    In the wild adventure that is house-hunting in Nigeria, there are chances that an unsuspecting tenant can be tricked into getting a house with heavy electricity arrears among other issues. This is Mark’s experience about the pains of estimated billing and the dishonesty of some landlords. 

    Walk us through your experience getting an apartment in Lagos

    I started house-hunting in early 2020, just as we were entering the lockdown proper. Lagos being what it is, has a high demand for residential buildings. It wasn’t easy at all. The process of jumping from one agent to another was so annoying. You’d have to pay an agent fee for anyone you came in touch with. And you’d still have to pay their transport fares.

    There are multiple agents for one property and when you call them, they’ll tell you agent fee is ₦5000. I found a way to negotiate it down to ₦2000 although this also depended on the nature of the apartment. Several agents took me around. I couldn’t find anyone to my taste because it felt like all the places I was taken to were shacks. And the landlords really don’t send you because they know that if you don’t take it, someone else will.

    I was just walking on my own one day and was fortunate enough to see this bricklayer working in front of a building still under construction. I stopped to ask if he could give me the contact details of the house owner or the agent in charge. He told me all the apartments in the building were already taken, even though it was still under construction. Imagine the extent people go to secure houses in Lagos.

    Wow.

    Anyway, he told me there was an available place somewhere he had finished working on, somewhere around the Palmgrove-Shomolu axis. Lucky me! When I got to the location I found the only available room left there — it was a one room self-con with a bathroom and kitchen and it looked quite spacious. I didn’t waste time, I took it. I paid ₦300,000 for the rent. Agent fee, agreement and damages took ₦50,000 each, so in total I paid ₦450,000. Service charge came down to ₦5,000 a month.

    The next week, I moved in. This was in June 2020. The building had 14 flats of different sizes in it. Before paying the rent I confirmed with the landlord about any outstanding bills —  Electricity, water, service charges and all. He promised that we would be getting a prepaid meter and made me feel at ease and I believed I was getting a very good deal.

    So, I settled in my place. The first three months were smooth. We were paying our electricity bills at ₦2000 per occupant which seemed fair enough even though I didn’t have appliances at the time. In the fourth month I started noticing some hidden charges in the light bill. Electricity distribution officials would come around to harass us. They’d tell us we had some things to pay. From ₦2000 it went to ₦3000, then ₦5000, then ₦7000. When it got to ₦7000, I knew there was a problem as it wasn’t normal anymore. The bills we started getting were outrageous, the type that printing presses or industrial companies accumulate.

    Our light bill as a whole moved from around ₦100,000 to ₦200,000 per month. Don’t forget that the landlord had promised that I’d get a prepaid meter. He didn’t fulfill that promise and so the Ikeja Electricity Distribution Company (IKEDC) was charging us based on estimated billing. If we were only billed based on three meters — which was what the house had at the time — it would have at least been bearable. 

    We later found out that the landlord had opened extra accounts with IKEDC for the prepaid meters that were yet to arrive. So we were receiving estimated billings for the yet to be installed meters. They opened 10 accounts like that for that building.

    Ah!

    To make matters worse, I found out that the house had accumulated a power bill of ₦3 million before I even became a tenant. At first, we thought it was a joke because the landlord said he had cleared every debt. He swore to God and everything, asking us to confirm from outsiders. We tried everything, including going to IKEDC’s office to confirm the authenticity of our landlord’s claims. The IKEDC officials showed us the account and we saw the bill for ourselves. An outstanding bill of ₦3 million was passed down to us.

    This three million was aside the prepaid meter accounts that were opened for us. So while we were even thinking of how to resolve that debt, another was piling. Every month, we were receiving estimated billings for these prepaid accounts. Some months we’d receive bills as high as ₦700,000.

    What?

    See ehn. We were in a bad place because who doesn’t want light? And no matter what, you cannot shoulder all that debt on yourself with your salary. How much will you have left at the end of the month? 

    We had several engagements with the landlord and asked him to at least try to clear his own end of the outstanding bill. Among the tenants we agreed to pay ₦60,000 each to at least offset some of the bills because IKEDC’s harassment was unbearable. Almost every day you’d see them coming to disconnect us. Imagine the pain of coming back from work, every other person has light and it’s just you living in darkness.

    Even after we convinced the landlord to clear his own debt, we had a new problem. The uninstalled prepaid meters had accumulated a bill of ₦3 million — this was separate from the ₦3 million the landlord was owing. It was a real terror for me. The estimated billing was pure extortion by IKEDC. No matter how much electricity was used, there’s just no way we were consuming that much.

    Eventually, the landlord met with his lawyer who advised him to put the house up for sale. By early December 2021, we received an eviction notice. Despite the eviction notice, we were still paying bills through our nose.

    Towards the end of December, the landlord came with a surprise announcement. He had had a rethink and would no longer sell the house.

    Phew.

    But there was a catch. The landlord informed us that at the end of the year, we would be treated as fresh tenants. This meant we were to pay agreement, commission and all those fees again. And he doubled it. What we were paying as ₦50,000 had become ₦100,000. He also increased rent, some apartments increased by ₦100,000 while some increased by ₦200,000.

    The audacity. Did you explore any other options on your own? 

    Yeah. We tried to engage an insider who worked with IKEDC to confirm if there was a scam going on with the billing. But then, they all work for the same people and even if there was, there was no incentive for him to get to the bottom of it. 

    We also tried to engage a lawyer. But I noticed that not all the tenants were into that and some were nonchalant about it. Me taking it all upon myself would have been an exercise in futility.

    I had no choice and as much as I hated to cough up those fees, the place had some features that I liked. It was just unfair to be given an eviction notice for no reason and then to have my rent increased unjustly. 

    What happened to the laws on giving quit notice and not increasing rent until after three years? There are many unanswered questions and I know that even though my story might be different from others, there are some similarities that you will find that Lagos tenants face at the hands of their landlords.

    Even though it was difficult for me, I just had to pay. I considered the stress of looking for a new apartment, moving, repainting and so on. There was also the fact that most places wouldn’t be as spacious as where I am. Also, if I was getting a new place I’d still have to pay those commissions and other charges. My plan was that if I had to move, it would be to a bigger accommodation and at the time I didn’t have the funds for that.

    What is the situation for you like now?

    Not every tenant renewed their rent. Some were aggrieved and felt cheated. For those of us that stayed, we finally received our prepaid meters. Ideally, IKEDC will need you to pay a certain amount before giving you a prepaid meter. What they  did was to sum up the debt and split it equally across those meters.

    Whether you’re a new or old tenant, you have an outstanding bill waiting for you if you agree to stay in that building. So every month I pay two light bills, one to offset an outstanding charge and another to pay for the power I plan to use for that month. And I cannot skip these payments or else I won’t be able to load up my prepaid meter. The last time I checked, the outstanding bill on my meter was ₦400,000.

    Sigh. What advice would you give to people looking for accommodation in Lagos?

    First, you should do due diligence on any apartment you plan to move to. When agents are showing you a house, just note the address. Take it to an electricity distribution office to confirm if there are any outstanding bills for that address. 

    This is important because these are things the landlord won’t tell you. Even if they tell you the house has prepaid meters, don’t fall for it because even those have hidden bills. In your excitement about getting a prepaid meter, you may not be aware that there are bills you’d end up servicing.

     *Name changed to protect their identity.

  • What Is Wrong With the Lagos State Fire Service?

    On October 23, 2022, Governor Babajide Sanwo-Olu bragged on Twitter about the delivery of 62 brand-new fire trucks and support vehicles for the Lagos State Fire Department. The vehicles paraded the streets of Lagos like happy children would display their Christmas clothes to their friends and haters. 

    But when a fire started burning a building under construction in the heart of Victoria Island in Lagos one week later, those trucks didn’t arrive fast enough to stop it. 30 minutes after the fire started, an eyewitness reported there were no firefighters on the scene to help. 

    If you were on Adeola Odeku Street between the hours of 10 am and 12 pm on November 1, 2022, a happy new month greeting would’ve been the last thing on your mind. The fire claimed the life of one man and injured nine other people. 

    Not to mention that in the official public report of the incident, the Lagos State Fire Service conveniently didn’t state the time the fire service arrived at the scene. 

    The incident sparked conversations about the operations of the fire service in the state and what rules guide them. How do the firefighters compare to operations of other countries and how can citizens help?

    What’s missing from Nigeria’s fire service laws?

    Rather than finding evidence of regulations, we found a whole lot of laws that the Lagos State Fire Service conveniently left out of the books. Here are a few of them:

    The absence of proper safety equipment

    Nowhere in the Lagos State Fire Service Law does it state that firefighters should wear the proper safety gear at all times. There’s not even a penalty, so even if a firefighter feels like wearing agbada and heels to quench fires, they’re more than free.

    The absence of ETA reports

    In the same document, there are no laws compelling firefighters to submit an estimated time of arrival report. So, if Lagos firefighters decide to use African time to show up to emergencies, no one is really checking them because they’re probably not documenting it. 

    What are the fire laws for other countries?

     It shouldn’t come as a surprise to find out the United Kingdom and the United States of America have more efficient response times and rules on safety gear than Nigeria. 

    In America, not wearing your safety gear on duty attracts some serious fines. A town in Maine was fined $22,000 just because their firefighters lacked equipment and were poorly trained. In the UK, failure to follow fire safety regulations like protective wear could result in unlimited fines.

    Also, response times to fire incidents in the US and UK have never been more than 7 minutes and 5 minutes respectively. We don’t even know that Nigeria has a response time target for firefighters.

    What can you do when there’s a fire outbreak?

    Putting out an out-of-control fire is a collaborative process and isn’t a job for firefighters alone. There are many ways for citizens to help in their own ways:

    • Know your building’s evacuation plan: Most buildings usually have a fire exit sign. Don’t just pass it by, memorise and use that exit when there’s a fire. 
    • For buildings without precautions, always know all the available exits and use your two legs when there’s trouble.
    • Always try to know the location of fire extinguishers or buy one. E get why.
    • It’s important to call emergency numbers as quickly as possible because firefighters won’t know there’s a fire unless someone calls them. You can call 08033235891 for the Lagos State Fire Service or 112 for the Federal Fire Service.
  • Lagos Bus Drivers Are On Strike to Break Free from Agbero Billing

    On October 31, 2022, the Joint Drivers’ Welfare Association of Nigeria (JDWAN) commenced a seven-day strike in Lagos State due to indiscriminate harassment and extortion by managers of parks and garages in Lagos State.

    For a city known for its trademark yellow buses, it’s a strange sight to wake up on a Monday morning and find them absent from the usually busy traffic routes. 

    The strike has left Lagosians stranded and waiting in line for the few available buses on the roads, as seen in videos posted on social media. Predictably, the scarcity of buses has led to price hikes along several routes.

    Citizen spoke to some bus drivers for their thoughts on the strike.

    Segun — a bus driver plying Obalende to Ajah

    “The bus fare from Obalende to Ajah is ₦700. It was ₦500 earlier last week, but fuel scarcity made it ₦700 mid week. For the loading of passengers at the bus stop, we pay ₦‎6000 daily — ₦‎3000 at Obalende, ₦‎3000 at Ajah. 

    “Immediately I collect money from my passengers, I pay it to the enforcer that helps me call in passengers. They give us tickets marked with the date so we can’t even think of outsmarting them when they ask us for their money the next day.



    “I support the strike because the daily extortion eats into our profits. I used to own three buses, and I leased two out to other drivers. I thought they were ripping me off with their poor weekly returns but I’ve seen things for myself. I now own just one bus that I drive myself and the agbero payment is ruining my business. If I complain and refuse to pay, they’ll damage my side mirror, windshield or something valuable in my bus.”

    ALSO READ: 9 Types of Bus Conductors You Will Meet in Lagos

    Chinedu — a bus driver in Sabo

    The strike hasn’t affected me, it’s business as usual. They said the strike will reach seven days but I don’t think they’ll complete it because these are commercial buses and anyone can come out at any time. Obviously, I still want the government to do something about the strike because the agberos extort us a lot. 

    “As I am now, I’ll pay for loading and booking. From junction to junction, the money we pay every day is ₦‎7000, I swear to God. I heard there was a meeting with the government before the strike commenced but I wasn’t a part of it.”

    Akinleke — a driver in Bariga

    “The strike affects me as I’m in transportation for Lagos State. I used to work with the local government until I had an accident that affected me in 2020. MC Musilliu collected our work from the local government. Before then, national transport unions were different from local ones but MC collected all of them. 

    “The strike is supposed to be from Monday to Monday, but look outside, you can still see vehicles going about their business.”

    *Dele — a driver in Yaba

    “The government needs to call LASTMA, the task force and even the police to order. They collect money from us and it’s not little. If the task force holds you they would extort anything between ₦80,000 and ₦100,000. How much do we make? 

    Agbero will collect, task force will collect, LASTMA will collect, police officers will collect and they’ll do it with force because the Lagos State government gives them the avenue to do so. Can they try this in other states? We work for others to eat. 

    “Honestly, I don’t really mind if it’s just the agberos extorting us, we can manage that. But when you add the rest including the task force and LASTMA, those are the problems. The government should do something about that.”

    *Subject’s name has been changed to protect his identity.

    ALSO READ: All The Struggles With Using Danfos In Lagos

  • These Other Areas in Lagos Are Also at the Risk of Flooding

    A few weeks after the Lagos State government warned residents of some areas about floods, new areas are also now at risk.

    [Image source: PM News Nigeria]

    Which areas are affected?

    The Lagos State government has placed residents of these areas on notice:

    • Victoria Island
    • Lekki
    • Ikoyi
    • Epe
    • Badagry

    ALSO READ: These Areas in Lagos Are at the Risk of Flooding

    What’s the government saying?

    The Commissioner for the Environment and Water Resources, Tunji Bello, said the areas may be affected because of the Lagos lagoon. Water in the lagoon has reached its highest level and is now threatening to spill over into these areas. The government expects the floods to cause a mess in the streets and major roads of the affected areas.

    What’s the government doing?

    According to Bello, the government is currently draining water channels across the state and constructing new ones. There’s also a quick response Emergency Flood Abatement Gang set up to free up manholes that may cause blockage.

    What should affected Lagosians do?

    [Image source: Punch Newspapers]

    The commissioner advised Lagosians in the affected areas to do these three things:


    1. Monitor incidental rains regularly

    2. Desist from dumping refuse in the drains 

    3. Clean their tertiary drains regularly.

    ALSO READ: How to Protect Your Health in a Flooding Crisis, According to WHO

  • As a flooding disaster sweeps through many states in Nigeria, millions of Nigerians are experiencing hardship. Since the start of 2022, over 600 lives have been lost and over a million people have become homeless.

    [Image source: Leadership Newspapers]

    The recent wave of disasters has hit communities in Kogi, Adamawa, Anambra, Benue, Yobe, and many others. But similar ugly scenes may be about to play out in Lagos State.

    A warning for Lagosians

    The Lagos State Commissioner for the Environment and Water Resources, Tunji Bello, announced early in October that communities near the banks of the Ogun River are at risk of flooding. Other communities are also at risk due to the release of water from the overflowing Oyan Dam in Ogun State.

    Which Lagos communities are at risk?

    The Lagos State government said the following areas could be flooded at any moment:

    1. Ketu
    2. Alapere
    3. Agric
    4. Owode Onirin
    5. Ajegunle
    6. Alagbole
    7. Kara
    8. Isheri Olowora
    9. Araromi Otun Orisha community
    10. Agiliti
    11. Maidan
    12. Mile 12
    13. Odo Ogun
    14. Owode Elede
    15. Agboyi 1
    16. Agboyi II
    17. Agboyi III

    What does this mean for affected Lagosians?

    The most important move for residents of the affected areas is to relocate to safer, higher ground. But it’s unclear whether the government is providing temporary shelters for them.

    For those that are unable to move ahead of time, it’s important to stay vigilant for any drastic change in the environment to ensure they’re not stranded. They should also always stay informed to get ahead of any potential disaster.

  • Everything We Know About Nigeria’s Worst Flooding in 10 Years

    In 2012, Nigeria lost 431 people to flooding incidents that also displaced 1.2 million people across 30 states. The flooding disaster affected over seven million people with losses estimated at ₦2.6 trillion. The 2012 floods were the worst Nigeria had seen in 40 years and no other year has touched the hem of its garment since then, until 2022.

    Flood in Nigeria 2022

    [Image source: Reuters/Afolabi Sotunde]

    For months, many communities in Nigeria have received August visitors in the form of destructive floods. These floods have forced thousands of people out of their homes.

    Flood in Nigeria 2022

    No Noah’s ark. Only Governor Yahaya Bello of Kogi State in a canoe with his film crew

    Who’s affected?

    The National Emergency Management Agency (NEMA) reported that 33 Nigerian states recorded flood incidents between January and August 2022. These incidents affected 508,000 people, including 372 that died. NEMA also reported at least 277 people were injured during these floods. The devastation destroyed 37,633 homes and caused the loss of livestock. But the figures NEMA reported aren’t even close to the devastation state officials have reported.

    Flood in Nigeria 2022

    [Image source: AP Photo]

    Since that September report, major flooding incidents occurred in nine local government areas in Kogi State, displacing over 50,000 people in one local government area alone.

    Anambra State also reported the displacement of 651,053 people after floods submerged houses, farmlands, schools, health centres, police stations and other critical infrastructure. 

    The floods also affected over 31,000 people over the course of six months and displaced 6,592 residents across 255 communities in Yobe State. The incidents resulted in the death of 75 people and the destruction of houses and livestock worth millions of naira.

    At least seven people were reported dead when flash floods affected many communities in Lagos State in July. In August, more than 50 people lost their lives in floods triggered by heavy rainfalls in dozens of communities in Jigawa State. In the same month, at least 10 people died and thousands were displaced in flood incidents in Adamawa State. More than 3,000 people were displaced in Jabilamba community alone.

    Flood in Nigeria 2022

    [Image source: Twitter/@AlejiOjay]

    The Bayelsa State government recently announced what it called “a flood break” for schools to shut down while water levels recede. This break will last for six weeks between October and November. The goal of the break is to safeguard the lives of teachers and students living in the predominantly riverine areas of the state.

    Tragic flood incidents have also been recorded in Borno, Ebonyi, Rivers, Niger, Nasarawa, Kebbi, Bauchi, Taraba, Delta, Kano, Gombe, Benue, Cross River and the Federal Capital Territory (FCT). Everywhere floods have shown up across Nigeria, there’s chaos.

    What’s causing the flooding?

    Nigeria’s struggle with flooding this year isn’t much of a surprise to authorities as it was covered in the 2022 Seasonal Rainfall Prediction report released in February by the Nigerian Meteorological Agency (NIMET).

    [Source: Twitter/@aliyusadiq_gky]

    Many of the affected states have been hit by flash floods caused by heavy rainfall, especially in communities close to water bodies. But the most recent flooding incidents have worsened with the September 13 release of excess water from Lagdo Dam in Cameroon. The excess water travels through the River Benue and its tributaries to wreak havoc on riverine communities in Nigeria. Nigerian officials expect the effect of the release from the dam to last till the end of October.

    The release of excess water from Kiri Dam in Adamawa is having the same effect on the crisis. The Nigeria Hydrological Services Agency (NIHSA) has also warned that the overflowing of the inland reservoirs in Nigeria including Kainji, Jebba, and Shiroro dams will worsen the severity of the floods until the end of October.

    What’s the government doing? 

    Flood in Nigeria 2022

    [Image source: NEMA]

    The government’s strategy in engaging with the flooding crisis includes

    1. Enlightenment of people in at-risk communities.

    2. Proper channeling of water bodies.

    3. Providing temporary shelters for displaced people.

    4. Providing relief items for the victims.

    [Image source: NEMA]

    How citizens can help to reduce flooding

    Outside of what the government should do to prevent future flood disasters, citizens can ease the flooding crisis by

    1. Not blocking waterways with garbage.

    2. Always clearing drainages.

    3. Not constructing buildings on waterways.

    4. Vacating to safer, higher grounds, for those living along river banks.

    [Source: Tribune]

    The floods haven’t only claimed lives and displaced tens of thousands of Nigerians, but also devastated communities and socioeconomic activities. When the invasive floods eventually recede, Nigerians should demand answers from all levels of government on why they didn’t do more to prevent a foretold crisis.

  • This Federal Lawmaker Wants to Shackle Agberos in Nigeria

    Agberos have become a huge part of the circle of transport life in Nigeria. They’re hard to miss — you can find them in motor parks, bus stops and highways extorting commercial drivers, tricyclists and motorcyclists. 

    With street names like Shadow and Poison, they’re not the kind of guys you want to engage in a shouting match because they can do one or two things to your face or your vehicle.

    In a state like Lagos, they’ve even gained some legitimacy — uniforms and all — to make transport operators pay them taxes, monies no one knows where they really go. Such illegal revenue generation by agberos has been mainstreamed all over Nigeria and transport operators have been the main victims of their activities.

    It’s always, “Where’s your tax?” never, “How’s the family?”

    On September 22nd, 2022, some of those transport operators in Anambra State protested against the burden of taxation and exploitation by agberos. The state governor, Charles Soludo, had recently ordered operators to start paying a ₦15,000 monthly tax to the government.  But they told him first to get rid of the agberos already charging them tax illegally. They refused to serve Mammon and God at the same time because the economy is hard and sapa is taking hostages.

    But only two days before this protest, far away in Abuja, a federal lawmaker was cooking a legislative action against the same villains.

    A federal frown

    On September 20th, 2022, lawmakers of the National Assembly resumed legislative sittings after two months of what they called “summer break”.

    One of the pressing businesses of the resumption day agenda in the House of Representatives was proposed by this guy:

    The name’s Edun… Lanre Edun

    Edun’s motion raised alarm on the unruly behaviour of agberos operating in Nigeria and persuaded the Nigerian government to make efforts to contain the scourge. Because the roads are a major mode of transportation and contribute significantly to Nigeria’s Gross Domestic Product (GDP), the lawmaker believes it must be saved from the grubby hands of agberos.

    “Grubby bawo? What’s the meaning?”

    Here’s a list of problems he has with them:

    1. They harass and extort commercial drivers, tricyclists and motorcyclists.

    2. They’re under the influence of alcohol and hard drugs and often resort to violence.

    3. The presence of agberos is increasing the cost of transportation for passengers.

    4. Some law enforcement officers are either in bed with them or too powerless to stop them.

    A call for reform

    Edun’s motion expressed worry that the agberos have simply refused to go away despite many government efforts to remove them. It may have something to do with the unemployment rate being at the worst level in Nigerian history, but we’d hate to speculate.

    Edun’s motion proposed four resolutions:

    1. Governments at all levels must check the lawlessness of agberos on Nigerian roads.

    2. Government authorities like the Ministry of Transport must develop methods to remove agberos from highways.

    3. Security agencies must arrest and prosecute offending agberos.

    4. An ad-hoc House Committee must be set up to investigate the activities of agberos in some states.

    Looking at you, Lagos

    Will this motion change anything?

    The existence of agberos in the Nigerian transport ecosystem has been a controversial subject for decades. No one knows where they fit exactly, but their existence is provocative, especially for the motorists and commuters who are often their victims. They’re generating billions of naira from people struggling to make a legitimate living, but who’s benefitting from it?

    Lanre Edun’s motion is a big step in giving the issue the attention it deserves at the highest level of government. But lawmakers stepped down the motion at the plenary because Edun failed to show up on the day his motion appeared on the agenda. We don’t know why a handsomely-paid public servant would fail to show up at work after two months on holiday, but we hope it wasn’t agberos that blocked his path.

    Until he shows up to attend to his motion, agberos can continue their reign of terror on the Nigerian transport ecosystem.

  • QUIZ: If You Can Relate to 10 Things on This List, Lagos Has Shown You Pepper

    If you can’t relate to at least seven things in this quiz you’re not a Lagosian.

    Find out:

    Tick all the things you can relate to:

  • How Monkeypox Spread Across Nigeria in 2022

    When monkeypox made a splash in the United Kingdom (UK) in May 2022, it felt like an isolated incident that would quickly pass like a social media trend. This was because the virus has been a largely African problem for decades. 

    But then it spread to a few other countries in Europe and North America. This August visitor was starting to cause of bit of a panic by popping up in strange places but health officials were still confident about easily containing it. But monkeypox said:

    How Monkeypox Spread Across Nigeria in 2022

    They were so wrong that the World Health Organisation (WHO) had to declare monkeypox a public health emergency of international concern on July 23rd 2022. By the time this happened, monkeypox had already hopped into dozens more countries across the world. It was like someone told the virus to feel at home and it took control of the TV remote.

    Between May 2022 and August 2022, monkeypox cases climbed from a few dozens to over 30,000 in nearly 90 countries. The outbreak is the first wide outbreak of monkeypox outside of Central and West Africa.

    And while many non-endemic countries have been worse-hit, endemic countries like Nigeria haven’t been having the best time too.

    Monkeypox’s origin story in Nigeria

    The WHO recorded the first case of monkeypox in the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC) in 1970.

    Nigeria’s first large-scale monkeypox outbreak happened in 2017 when the virus caused a nationwide panic. The Nigeria Centre for Disease Control (NCDC) recorded 88 cases that year. The agency further recorded 49 cases in 2018, 47 cases in 2019, eight cases in 2020 and 34 cases in 2021. The annual case load was low enough that Nigeria didn’t need to sweat in monitoring the virus. Until 2022.

    How monkeypox got its groove back in Nigeria

    With monkeypox doing a rare worldwide tour in new locations, endemic countries like Nigeria heightened surveillance of the disease. And what that has shown is that 2022 is the worst year on record ever for monkeypox in the country. 

    How Monkeypox Spread Across Nigeria in 2022

    While authorities recorded 226 cases in five years, they have have confirmed 157 cases between January and July 2022. The trend of the outbreak shows that the upsurge in cases didn’t start until May when the global trend started building.

    In January, Adamawa, Imo and the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) recorded one case each. In February, the NCDC confirmed one additional case in Lagos. 

    The NCDC confirmed six cases in March and five more in April. At this point, monkeypox was present in seven states, with Cross River, Kano and Delta joining the roster. 

    Rivers and Bayelsa joined the party when the NCDC found six more cases in May and one person died.

    On May 26th, with monkeypox attracting more global attention, the NCDC activated a national emergency operations centre to improve response to the virus. This improved attention may have been responsible for what happened in June when the number of cases skyrocketed.

    The NCDC confirmed 61 new cases between May 30th and July 3rd. Two more people died within this period, and the virus had already spread to 21 states in total.

    An additional 72 cases popped up between July 4th and July 31st, leaving the total number of monkeypox cases in 2022 at 157 in 26 states. The total number of deaths also increased to four.

    How Monkeypox Spread Across Nigeria in 2022

    What was responsible for the surge, in the NCDC’s words? 

    Enhanced surveillance at national and subnational levels with improved case detection and reporting as well as the recent attention from the global outbreak have contributed in part or whole to the observed increase in cases which we have seen this year.

    Since 2017, Nigeria has recorded a total of 383 monkeypox cases in 30 states and 12 deaths.

    The only states not affected by the virus in Nigeria are Jigawa, Kaduna, Kebbi, Osun, Sokoto, Yobe and Zamfara.

    How Monkeypox Spread Across Nigeria in 2022

    How does monkeypox spread?

    The monkeypox virus can spread from infected animals like monkeys, squirrels and rodents, to humans, usually through direct contact with body fluids, blood or the skin or lesions. Transmission can also happen through a bite, scratch, poor handling of, or consuming inadequately cooked or other products of infected bushmeat. 

    Monkeypox can also spread from human to human through contact with respiratory droplets and contaminated materials such as bedding.

    What are the monkeypox symptoms?

    The symptoms of monkeypox include sudden fever, headache, body pain, weakness, sore throat, and enlargement of glands (lymph nodes) in the neck and under the jaw. The appearance of a rash on the face, palms, soles of the feet, genitals and other parts of the body is also possible. 

    The monkeypox fever can escalate the rash which tends to spread across the body of an infected person with the face and palms being the most affected. The rash can also occur in and around the genitals, which is why contact during sex is also a mode of transmission.

    The illness from monkeypox usually lasts between two to four weeks.

    How to protect yourself from monkeypox

    How Monkeypox Spread Across Nigeria in 2022

    There are many tips on how to protect yourself from monkeypox infection, but here are the highlights from the NCDC:

    1. Avoid contact with host animals like monkeys, gorillas, squirrels and rodents, especially in areas where infections have been confirmed.

    2. Avoid unnecessary physical contact with infected patients.

    3. Practice frequent handwashing with soap and water especially after caring for, or visiting sick people.

    4. Ensure all animal food products are properly cooked before eating.

    5. Report all cases with the associated symptoms to the nearest health facility.

    Is there a vaccine?

    At least three vaccines which were developed as smallpox vaccines are considered suitable to fight the monkeypox outbreak

    The vaccination is strictly meant for those who have been exposed to monkeypox and people who may be more likely to be infected. But there’s a shortage of vaccines and poorer countries like Nigeria are at the back of the queue. This means, as a Nigerian, prevention is better than cure.

    ALSO READ: What’s Nigeria’s Business With the Monkeypox Virus Spreading Through Europe?

  • QUIZ: If You Can Unscramble These Lagos Nightclub Names, You Belong to the Streets

    If you get more than 7/12 on this quiz, you belong to the streets. Don’t fight it.

    Take the quiz.

  • QUIZ: Can We Describe Your Relationship with Lagos Traffic?

    Lagos traffic is a bad bitch that treats everybody however it wants. But we all have different relationships with it. Some gentle, others abusive. Take this quiz and find out what yours is like.

    Pick all the things you’ve experienced in Lagos traffic:

  • How Much Should a First Date Cost? — 7 Nigerians Tell Us

    If you’re going out on a first date, do you think a certain amount of money should be spent? As the spender or the spendee, we asked seven Nigerians how much they think a first date should cost. Here’s what they said. 

    “Men are expected to audition to catch my attention”

    — Yinka*, 35

    Of course, it’s important to note that a first date should cost whatever the paying party can afford, but if I have to give a figure, I’d say ₦50k–₦70k. I tend to date within a certain income bracket, and first dates usually cost more than the ₦50k–₦70k average I gave. Men must pick me up, pay for fine dining and drop me off. Any place with nice food, music and background won’t be cheap. 

    The men I go on dates with have money and like spending on experiences, so we just order without looking at the bill. For example, if we’re drinking Glenfiddich, a bottle sometimes costs about ₦350k and above, while a bottle of wine can cost around ₦60k. 

    But if it’s someone I’m not that comfortable with yet and I want to go easy on their pockets, a first date should cost around ₦50k–₦70k. If we’re doing bottle service, maybe ₦100k. I drink at least two cocktails, and by the time we add starters, main course and dessert, we’ve already racked up quite a bit. That’s why ₦50k–₦70k works as a safe ballpark figure. And yes, I can spend that money on any date, not just a date with a man. I’ve usually spent more with women because I enjoy their company, but men are expected to audition to catch my attention, so let them spend. 

    “I’m not rich, so I’m unlikely to spend more than 15k” 

    — John*, 26

    I don’t have a lot of requirements on what a first date should look like, just that I hope my date and I enjoy each other’s company and have shared interests. But I’m not rich, so it’s unlikely I’d spend more than ₦15k on a date at this point in my life. Indoor dates are more my style anyway, because they’re more intimate, and you also get more value for your money. On the last indoor date I did, I spent like ₦13k which covered  a three-course meal and two bottles of wine. 

    There was a time I spent ₦25k on a date because we went out for dinner. It wasn’t a luxury restaurant, so the bill was not as high. 

    RELATED: 10 Questions to Ask on a First Date to Be Sure You’ve Found “The One

    “An ideal first date costs money, no matter how much we like to pretend it doesn’t”

    — Jane, 21

    A first date can cost anywhere from ₦10k–₦100k, but I’d like to put the average at about ₦35k. That amount of money works well for the kind of first dates I like or take people on. We can go grocery shopping, I make a home-cooked meal while I  talk with my date, eat, drink and watch something on TV. Also, it covers a small “thank you for coming” gift. It’s an excellent way to get to know someone in a very intimate setting. 

    I’d like if someone did these for me too. Something soft and sweet that gives me a chance to know them on an ideal first date costs money, no matter how much we like to pretend it doesn’t. On a first date, you’re trying to make an impression, and that’s never cheap — especially not in this economy. 

    “Sha hold the money. This is Lagos” 

    — Ebenezer*, 27

    I think the cost of dates depends significantly on the city you live in. I hear that Abuja is cheap, and many people are eating for as low as ₦15k on their dates. But in Lagos? You need to hold like ₦50k in case of incasity. First dates usually involve food because eating is excellent, but I try to add things like watching a movie or going to an art gallery. But no matter what you do on your first date, sha hold the money. This is Lagos. E fit be police wey go stress you. 

    Plus, you may spend more than your budget on a date. Even if you know a place and have planned what you’d order, you may not know what is going through your date’s mind. One time I was caught slipping, and while it wasn’t the most I’d spent on a date, it shocked me because I didn’t expect a bill of about ₦40k+. I paid it o, but I didn’t go out again for the rest of the month. 

    Honestly, that’s one of my issues with dating. What will remain if you’re doing multiple ₦40k dates in a month? How much is my salary? 

    But the most I’ve ever spent was ₦80k, and if you ask me if it was worth it, I’d say no. If I’m not with the person in holy matrimony, then e no worth am at all.

    RELATED: 8 Nigerian Women Tell Us About the Best Date They Have Had

    “Speaking as a broke person, the minimum is ₦20k”

    — Amaka*, 26

    I think a ₦20k budget is fair. To be honest, with this budget, you shouldn’t go to any restaurant in Lagos to eat. Instead, it’s for playing games at an arcade or going bowling. With my current partner, our first date was at an arcade, which was nice. You can also plan a picnic for two with this money. 

    But essentially, a date should depend on what the person can afford, and speaking as a broke person, the minimum is ₦20k. Even that ₦20k is somehow because in Lagos, all you have to do is go outside and breathe, and your money has finished. 

    “It depends on the nature of the date”

    — Osas*, 30

    The price of a first date is dependent on a couple of things. Sometimes things have been intense since day one, so they want a more intimate date. Other times it’s very casual so they may enjoy a more relaxed atmosphere. 

    The nature of the date also plays a massive role in how much a date will cost. So here’s my breakdown: a coffee/tea date is between ₦5k–₦7k, and a movie date is ₦10k–₦15k, including tickets and snacks. If you want a  Netflix date, it can cost between ₦0–₦20k depending on whether you want to eat homemade food or order delivery. 

    A games night can cost between ₦5k–₦15k which covers the cost of game tokens and a meal before or after. If you plan on going out for drinks, that can cost between ₦8k–₦16k depending on the cost of cocktails, beverages and location. A walk in the park is ₦0–₦10k, depending on if you’re buying snacks. And then, a restaurant date can cost between ₦10k–₦30k depending on the food and location. For restaurant dates, I feel like Chinese restaurants give the most value for money in terms of quality and quantity. 

    So, there are a lot of factors to consider. With my partner, our first date was a movie date and it didn’t cost much. 

    “I like to pack multiple activities into one date”

    — Bisi*, 26 

    A first date should cost between ₦20k–₦50k because I think a date should cost a minimum of ₦10k per person. It may be cheaper for some people, but I like to pack multiple activities into a date. A first date may involve seeing a movie, attending an event and then grabbing dinner. Doing various things is sure to cost more money. If it comes down to it, we can share the cost, and I can cover my expenses, but men usually want to pay for everything, so I let them. 

    * Names have been changed for anonymity 
    RELATED: 6 Fun Activities to Try With Your Partner That Won’t Break the Bank

  • Living in Lagos Made Easy, Twitter Edition

    The unending floods, traffic and hiked transport fares are here, and so, if you’re still living in Lagos, two things are certain: you’re either in love with suffering or you’ve hacked surviving the city.

    No one person has the answer, so we compiled a list of very important tips for surviving Lagos, sourced from Twitter. 

    This first tip goes without saying, but you see that madness? It’s even more important.

    Even if you don’t understand Yoruba, you should have a handful of insults ready for whoever tries to mess with you.

    Because if your daddy was a king, why would he let you live in Lagos? *Tearss*

    If you still don’t know this, maybe you need to learn the hard way.

    READ NOW: The Horrible Stages of Losing Your Phone in Computer Village

    Why? We don’t know, but a lot of people agreed with him and he’s a doctor—he has to be right. 

    We’re pretty sure this is part of your driving school test.

    And before then, take swim lessons.

    Nobody will want to mess with you if you keep reminding them that you’re not normal.

    Wait, where do you think you are?  

    LMAO, whether you’re in a hurry or not, you can’t appear sluggish at any point, that’s how they take you fi idiat. 

    After being stuck in traffic, paying double fare price, and still having to swim the rest of the way home, why should anything be funny to you?

    WHILE YOU’RE HERE: 7 Things You Must Always Carry With You in Lagos

  • QUIZ: Which Lagos Road Menace Are You?

    Are you danfo, molue or okada? Take the quiz to find out:

  • QUIZ: Which Lagos Bus Stop Are You?

    Just like people in Lagos have different personalities, the same is true for bus stops. Some bus stops are so calm and relaxed, while others are filled with struggle and noise.

    Take this quiz and find out which Lagos bus stop you are.

  • What You Need to Remember About Latest Okada Ban in Lagos

    The governor of Lagos State, Babajide Sanwo-Olu, is not a great fan of okadas. According to his government, okada riders pose a grave security risk to the state and are involved in too many road accidents. 

    To arrest the situation, the Lagos State government announced restrictions on the operations of okadas in Lagos on May 18th 2022. 

    But the okada ban is not exactly new

    The Lagos State government has always been locked in an unending battle with motorcycles in the state. Restricting their operations is a rite of passage that every Lagos governor since 1999 has explored in one way or the other.

    Governor Sanwo-Olu first announced a ban in certain areas in 2020, but enforcement was weak and the motorcycles continued operations. The latest ban is simply a reinforcement of the 2020 ban.

    What You Need to Remember About Latest Okada Ban in Lagos

    Jungle justice caused the latest ban

    The latest ban is the government’s reaction to the lynching of a sound engineer, David Sunday, around Admiralty Way in Lekki Phase One. The Police allege that okada riders killed Sunday and burnt his body following a dispute over bike fare and have arrested seven suspects

    Which areas are affected by the okada ban?

    Commercial motorcycles are completely banned in six local government areas (LGAs) and nine local council development areas (LCDAs). They are: 

    LGAs: Ikeja, Eti-Osa, Lagos Island, Lagos Mainland, Surulere and Apapa.

    LCDAs: Onigbongbo, Ojodu, Ikoyi-Obalande, Iru-Victoria Island, Lagos Island East, Itire-Ikate, Coker-Aguda, Iganmu and Yaba.

    RELATED: How Has The Okada Ban Affected Your Life? – We Asked 7 People

    Is the okada ban restricted to just these places?

    While the operations of motorcycles are completely banned in the 15 areas, the Lagos State Transport Sector Reform Law of 2018 also stops motorcycles from operating on highways and bridges anywhere in Lagos. This means riders can operate on the inner roads of the other 14 unaffected LGAs, but never on highways and bridges.

    Kekes are also affected by the ban

    What You Need to Remember About Latest Okada Ban in Lagos

    Even though okadas have taken centre-stage in relation to the ban, it also affects commercial tricycles (known as Keke Marwa). They’re also banned in all the affected areas, as well as on all highways and bridges in Lagos State.

    Enforcement of the latest okada ban starts June 1st 2022

    Enforcement of the ban won’t start until June 1st 2022. The Lagos State government expects that there won’t be any motorcycles or tricycles in the affected areas.

    Passengers will be treated as offenders

    What You Need to Remember About Latest Okada Ban in Lagos

    The Lagos State Police Force has warned that the enforcement of the ban will also affect passengers. This means if a rider is arrested for operating in affected areas, whoever is their passenger will also be treated as an offender.

  • Abuja Has Traffic Too, and 11 Other Things We Don’t Like to Tell Lagosians

    I still believe Lagos is the most stressful city to live in, but I also think Abuja people living in Lagos glamourise Abuja way too much. So as someone who’s lived, schooled and work in both cities, here are twelve things we don’t tell people about Abuja.

    1. There’s Traffic

    Yeah, I said it. There’s mad traffic in Abuja too. The 6 p.m. traffic in Abuja feels like you’ve been teleported to Lagos for a few hours. And God bless you if it happens to rain, that’s double the time you’ll spend trying to get home if you living on the outskirts. 

    The traffic spreads across central areas like Wuse, Maitama, and Wuye, after work, to areas further away from town like Lugbe, Kubwa and Maraba. So everywhere in Abuja is choked up until about  9 p.m.

    2. The rain is something else

    If Abuja rain should catch your clothes outside, it’s over for you. And if you forgot to pack them before leaving your house, no need because your neighbours won’t even act like they saw the clothes flying away. 

    3. Finding street food isn’t as easy

    In Abuja, you’ll never find Iya Sukirat selling amala or rice and ponmo stew down the road for your lunch break. The most you’ll see if you decide to look for street food on a hot afternoon in Abuja is roasted yam or corn. And although roasted yam bangs with pepper sauce, how many times can you eat that in a week? 

    4. Public transportation is just as stressful

    Without a personal car, Uber, or Bolt, navigating in Abuja is just hella difficult. Kekes aren’t allowed on certain roads, so carpooling kabu kabus is your best bet. And those things are more annoying than danfos.

    I agree kabu kabus are cheap, but how about the fact that four people are squeezed in the back seat? Picture all the bodies that will be squeezed against yours at the back. Let’s not even talk about the crowd fighting to get into the front seat during closing hours. You’re lucky if someone doesn’t elbow you. Just be grateful for your danfos in Lagos.

    5. Bukkas are way more expensive

    Eating in Lagos is definitely more expensive than in Abuja, but at least, if a spot is cheap, it’s really cheap. In Abuja, even the cheap ones are still stressful. They’ll call the place a bukka and you’ll still end up spending ₦1500 or ₦2k. Why? I won’t call names, but I’ve spent ₦200 for one akara at a bukka in Abuja before. I still bought it sha, but it was against my will. 

    RELATED: Four Reasons Why You Should Hate The Public Transport System 

    6. Drivers are also mad

    You think Lagos drivers are mad? LOL. I’ve learnt that the freer the roads, the more chaotic the drivers. You’d think the fact that we claim that there’s no traffic would slow us down, but no. Everyone is on the road like we’re playing Need for Speed. In a month, you’ll probably spot at least two car crashes because everyone is speeding recklessly. Abuja drivers don’t even care about stoplights, talk more about their cars. 

    7. Social circles are tight

    Making friends as an adult is hard, but making friends as an adult living in Abuja is harder. In Abuja, everyone minds their business. And at parties or events, people move in groups. If you’re new in town, you’re on your own. It can be intimidating to get into those social circles, but give it time I guess.

    8. You’ll get tired of kilishi (dried meat)

    Once you say you’re travelling from Abuja, everyone wants you to dedicate a bag to packing kilishi. The truth is, when you now live there, you forget that it actually exists. First, it’s expensive and then there’s like, only one spot in town that sells good kilishi, so that’s more work driving all the way there, depending on when you live. 

    RELATED: Here’s How You Can Get Free Kilishi In Abuja

    9. Sometimes, there’s no water

    Let’s be honest, almost every Abuja person has a meruwa (water supplier) guy on speed dial. And if you live on the top floor of your building, you probably have two. Once your neighbour downstairs turns on their tap, it’s either your tap’s pressure gets low, or the water completely stops.  That’s why renting a house in Abuja is such a gamble.

    10. Our roads are bad too

    Yes yes, we have the widest and freest roads. The thing is, when a road in Abuja is good, it’s really good. But when it’s bad, it’s really bad. It’s either untarred or has a lot more bumps than you’d expect. Take the EFAB estate road at Lifecamp. It’s been years and that stretch of road is still untarred. And when it rains, the whole area can get very messy. So look out for those hidden gems when you’re house hunting in Abuja.

    11. Shopping isn’t easy

    Abuja doesn’t have a Tejuosho or Eko market. Of course, there’s Wuse, Garki and Nyanya markets, but there aren’t as many options for affordable clothes. Imagine pricing jeans from ₦10k or ₦15k in the market.  Plus, you’ll spend a long time walking around to find pieces you love. Boutiques have more options, but the price of clothes there will send you back to your village. 

    12. Finding an ATM is one of the hardest things

    You may need the detective instincts of Fashola to find an ATM machine in Abuja. For some reason, ATMs are either always so far away or just not available. Then when you successfully find one, you’ll spend the rest of your day queueing. So when you need to do anything at the bank, 8:00 a.m. is not early enough. It’s better for you to be as early as the gateman, if not….

    ALSO READ: Where You Live in Abuja and What That Says About You

  • What She Said: After Jos, I Can’t Imagine Losing Myself Again

    Navigating life as a woman in the world today is interesting. From Nigeria to Timbuktu, it’ll amaze you how similar all our experiences are. Every Wednesday, women the world over will share their experiences on everything from sex to politics right here. This is Zikoko’s What She Said.

    Today’s subject for #ZikokoWhatSheSaid is Michelle Nelson, a 25-year-old Nigerian woman. She talks about leaving Jos in 2012 after the religious riots started in 2001, and discovering versions of herself that make the woman she is today.

    How old were you when you left Jos?

    15. It’s a place with some of my fondest memories but was also the most scarring period of my life. Two years ago was the first time I could sleep well since we left Jos. I struggled with fear for so long.

    I’m sorry you experienced that. 

    Thank you. Jos is something I’ve always wanted to talk about.

    How about we start from the beginning?

    Yes, please. My parents found love in Jos. My mum was 18 when they met. A year later, she had me, and three years later, my brother. We were a small family. We lived in Dogon Dutse, located in the northern part of Jos. Although most of my years in Dogon Dutse were during the crisis, my earlier memories were good. Life was easy there.

    My mum was a full-time housewife, while my dad travelled for work all the time. We depended on just his salary because of how cheap things like food and rent were. 

    It sounds peaceful. Was it also fun?

    My parents were quite strict, so I don’t remember having much “fun”. Plus I was too young to be going to parties if there were even any at the time. I didn’t stay long enough to explore what fun meant for a teenager in Jos.

    Fun for me was running outside to lick ice whenever it rained and throwing it at my friends. That’s not something I ever got to experience outside of Jos. Dogon Dutse is known as the rock valley, so we did a lot of rock climbing too. If there’s anything I really loved, it would be those moments with my friends. Once we left Jos, making new ones became difficult.

    Why?

    Well, I’m an introvert. But there was the part of trying to figure out who I was after I’d seen so much death. 

    Let’s talk about the riots. 

    I witnessed my first in primary school. I can’t remember my age, but I remember the scene. There’d been religious riots around Jos, and it got close to Dogon Dutse. Everyone was scared. My brother and I were at the front of our school waiting for my mum to pick us up. Before she came, I watched people cling to their kids and important documents as they ran for safety. 

    And your dad?

    My dad worked with road safety and was posted to different parts of the country all the time. My mum had to be the strong one, but I could see the fear in her eyes, I could feel it. 

    After that, there were at least two or three more attacks. There were times we had to hide in the rocks around Dogon Dutse to feel safe. Falling asleep was impossible. About 11 years later, my dad finally asked us to relocate to Akwa Ibom. No one objected. I knew I’d miss my friends in Jos, but I also knew I wouldn’t survive another two or three years there. We had to go.

    I’m really sorry. What was it like living somewhere new for the first time?

    I still couldn’t sleep, but it was better than Jos. I still woke up in the middle of the night from nightmares. 

    Losing the familiarity of Jos also affected me. I had eight really tight friends back home, and it dawned on me that I might never see them again. Living miles away eventually took its toll on keeping in touch. Even the one person I thought would be in my life forever got married and moved on with her own life. I had to focus on my new life in Akwa Ibom.

    Did you talk to your parents?

    I tried once or twice to tell my mum, but she didn’t take it seriously. She felt I could easily get over it. Till now, she doesn’t acknowledge that it was a traumatic phase for me. It usually ended with a joke or two on how I exaggerated things. Maybe it’s a Nigerian parent thing.

    As for my dad, we weren’t close enough for me to open up. And my brother was too little to understand how I felt about the nights we had to hide. So I was on my own.  Now that I think about it, what I needed was therapy. 

    What did you get instead?

    Church. Going to church helped when I couldn’t handle the emotions alone. I finally got used to the peace I felt in Akwa Ibom. I’d wake up scared, and my brain would remind me that I was safe. 

    Sweet. What was Akwa Ibom like?

    Even though I felt like I had to start my life over again, the great part was experiencing the culture outside Jos. Like… the accent. It was very different from Jos. The people were also a lot more outspoken, and that’s not something you get in the north. 

    What I really experienced for the first time in Akwa Ibom was love. I went from being a naive girl into a full-blown young lady that knew what it was like to be in love. It’s also where I got my first heartbreak. 

    LOL. That’s what we call breakfast.

    LOL. That breakfast was my first and last. Two years later, I went to uni in Delta. And that’s where I got my real culture shock. 

    My school was located in Warri, and the people were loud. And I mean very loud. In Akwa Ibom, I was mostly inside the house. Warri was the first place I experienced for myself because I lived on campus. So I got to move around town and saw a lot of the craziness.

    Let me just point out that I’m from Delta sha.

    LOL. Don’t be angry. Warri was a place you’d walk out and see a fight break out from nowhere. It was so different from Jos. Learning to speak pidgin English was the only way to blend. It made it easier to sync with the people there.

    What did you discover once you connected with the people?

    The extroverted version of myself. I was coming from my first heartbreak, so I wanted to have fun. I was hanging out with more people and partying. I think of it as my exploration phase.

    Then I made a friend in 2018, and she took it up a notch. We’d go out clubbing back to back and drinking the night away. I grew tired of it by 2019. I think it had to do with finishing uni and realising there was a lot more to life than partying. The introvert in me was also tired. 

    After Delta, I retired the clubbing phase of my life. 

    So who were you after Warri?

    A Lagos babe. Lol. Going back to Akwa-Ibom wasn’t an option for me. I was the first child, and I didn’t want to depend on my parents anymore. So when I finished my NYSC in Lagos, I decided to stay. I needed to figure shit out on my own.

    Did you? 

    It’s been two years since I moved, and I’d say yes. I’ve gotten a job, and I earn enough to support myself. I even started sleeping better. There’s still a lot of work I need to do to fully support my family, but at least I’m on the journey. 

    What do you miss about Jos?

    All the years I’d moved around, I never met people that lived through my reality in Dogon Dutse. I also didn’t meet people that stayed in my life while I moved between different phases. So I got used to being alone. I didn’t try to stay connected with my friends in Jos even though some of them tried. 

    But I’ll say this, I wish I tried harder. Last year, one of my Jos friends died. She’d been in Lagos, but we never spoke. I never even followed her back on Instagram. When my childhood friends organised a virtual memorial for her, our pictures seemed like a lifetime ago. I couldn’t picture us as the kids that snuck out of school. Too much time had passed, and I judged myself for allowing that gap.

    I’m sorry. Did you try to stay in contact after that?

    I try to follow people back on Instagram. LOL. 

    Let me be honest, I’m fine if I can’t build back the connections I lost. There are some things time can’t fix or change. I will try my best though.

    And Jos? Would you ever go back?

    Nah. I miss the memories there, but I’m happier with the version of myself I’ve discovered between Akwa Ibom, Warri and now, Lagos. I can’t imagine losing myself all over again. I’m only focused on getting to the point where I can live my life without fear. 

    I miss eating masa and suya though. It’s been way too long since I had some.

    For more stories like this, check out our #WhatSheSaid and for more women like content, click here

  • Cities in Nigeria and the Football Clubs They Represent

    Have you ever thought about what cities share the most similarities with your favourite football clubs? Well, we have, and now we’ve attempted to draw parallels between some of England’s biggest football clubs and places in Nigeria.

    Akure – Tottenham

    Small nyash wey dey shake sometimes. They had two minutes of good history and that was it. They’re both modest achievers and have a few notable individuals. Tottenham has a league cup to its name and Akure has… well, Shoprite and an airport.

    Calabar – Arsenal

    These two have a lot of good old days to remember. Just like Arsenal under Wenger played great football, Calabar used to be a really great place when it had that governor who built that famous mountain resort. Both are now better known for their lack of genuine progress. Calabarians bask in the golden years of Donald Duke just like Arsenal fans never stop bringing up their golden Premier League trophy from nearly 20 years ago.

    Ibadan – Liverpool

    A lot of history and notable figures with years and years of decay in the middle, and a renaissance engineered by a visionary leader in the persons of Seyi Makinde and Jurgen Klopp, respectively.

    Port Harcourt – Chelsea

    Loud, proud, notable individuals in recent history, great strides financed by oil money. Chelsea fans and folks from Port Harcourt are some of the proudest people you’ll ever meet.

    Lagos – Manchester United

    Great history. Many notable individuals. Ever since their iconic leaders (Babatunde Fashola and Sir Alex Ferguson) left them, they’ve been left at the mercy of administrators who haven’t measured up to standard. Meanwhile, fans and inhabitants of the club and city go to bed every night stressed, while trying to convince themselves they’re still as great as they used to be.

    Abuja – Manchester City

    They don’t have a long history or many notable individuals. In fact they don’t have as many inhabitants and fans as other cities and clubs around. But in terms of recent strides, they’ve become very high achievers thanks to the injection of oil money. Everyone is migrating from their cities and clubs to this city because they’re the shiniest new object in town. 

    QUIZ: Can You Match These Football Coaches to Their Clubs?

  • How to Spot an Ex-Lagosian Living in Abuja

    Lagosians leave Lagos and move to Abuja and won’t let anyone hear the last of it. They’re either telling the people they left in Lagos how Abuja is a far better option or trying so hard to convince those in Abuja that they’re one of them. They can try to deceive others but they can’t deceive us. We know how to spot ex-Lagosians living in Abuja from a thousand miles away. 

    1. They’re always in a rush

    You can take them away from the city, but you can’t take the city away from them. Even if you take Lagosians out of the country, that thing that always makes them rush won’t leave them alone. Always rushing from one place to the other. 

    2. They take “wake up and jumpstart” very literally

    Abuja people take time to prepare themselves for the day, unlike Lagosians. Lagosians wake up and start jumping all over the place. Zero time for self-care or meditation — or even to pause and catch their breaths. Even though they no longer have to plan their days or write to-do lists in stand-still traffic, the trauma response lives on with them. 

    3. The sight of cocaine surprises them 

    LOL. There’s sin in Lagos, but there’s a different kind of sin in Abuja. Lagos people will see cocaine and come and shout on Twitter.

    RELATED: Interview With Cocaine: “Why Are Abuja People Ashamed of Me?

    4. They’re always in awe of good roads 

    Lagosians are so used to suffering in traffic that the sight of good roads and a good road network leaves them in absolute awe. They always act like kids in a candy store when cruising through  Abuja. 

    5. They won’t shut up about leaving Lagos 😑

    Ex-Lagosians are always ready to mention how they left Lagos for Abuja. Please, it’s ok, we’ve heard you. The God that did it for you will also do it for us. Abi what do you now want us to say? 

    6. They let Abuja men ‘sleep over’ at their place. 

    How else will you know that they’re Johnny Just Come if they don’t let Abuja “spend the night” at theirs? Let them experience an Abuja man waiting on that life-changing contract and learn themselves. Experience is always the best teacher. 

    RELATED: 6 Jobs Abuja Men Do on the Side While Squatting With Their Babes

    7. “At least we have beaches in Lagos”

    This is for those ones who want to eat their cake and have it. They want to live in Abuja and experience Lagos. Oya go back to Lagos since you like the beach so much. “At least we have beaches in Lagos.” And so what? Go to Crushed Rock like the other people in Abuja are doing and let’s hear word, please. 

    That’s all from us for now. 

    ALSO READ: These Insane Tweets About Lagos Are Making Us Die of Laughter

  • What Should You Do When Buhari Visits Your City?

    If your city’s name is not London, then it’s not every day that it’s blessed with the presence of travel blogger, President Buhari. The United Kingdom has seen his gap-toothed smile more times than Lai Mohammed has spoken the truth.

    But the president will make a local stop in Lagos State on Tuesday, March 22nd 2022 on a work visit.

    What’s he looking for?

    President Buhari is in Lagos State for four things, and none of them is about the heat cooking the city.

    The high point of his visit is the commissioning of a new international terminal at the Murtala Muhammed International Airport. The last terminal was commissioned in 1979.

    That’s 43 years if you were counting

    The new terminal is expected to process over a dozen million passengers annually and decongest the operations of the old terminal. But will it stop airport officials from still harassing you to drop something for the boys? We can’t say at this time.

    Buhari’s second order of business is to commission the Dangote Fertiliser Plant in Lekki. He’ll also do inspection tours of the Lekki Deep Sea Port and Dangote Refinery. 

    Unfortunately, Chief Inspector Babatunde Fashola won’t be there to find cameras

    How should Lagosians react?

    Buhari leaving Abuja for anywhere inside Nigeria is a big deal, because you know he actually wants to be in London instead. But when he decides to step into your city, what are your options?

    Be a human red carpet 

    What you should do when Buhari visits your city

    If you’re a Buharist, the president’s visit to your city is easily the best thing to happen to you that week. Or month, if you don’t have a lot going for you. A presidential visit presents the opportunity to activate that Sai Baba devotion and show that you’re his Number 1 fan. Rolling out that red carpet for him is so outdated; you can become the carpet yourself.

    Take a sick day off work

    If you’re a Buhari hater, the president’s visit to your city will likely make you feel sick. Take a day off and tell your employer that your pet goat died or something and working is not on your list of priorities that day.

    ALSO READ: Why Is Buhari Using Nigeria’s $1 million to Do Giveaway for Afghanistan?

    Remind him of youth unemployment

    You also want to take a sick day off work, but you don’t have any work because you’re one of the 22.3 million Nigerians who are unemployed. You can join Buhari’s welcome party and display a placard to remind him that he’s not doing his job well. He may spot you as his convoy drives past, or he may be too busy not caring.

    What you should do when Buhari visits your city

    Stay at home

    For a place like Lagos, a presidential visit is also a test from God or the Devil — it’s hard to tell. Roads are blocked, there’s a lot of vehicular diversions and you’re stuck in traffic sweating like a Christmas goat. Your recourse is to stay home and pray the president leaves as quickly as possible. Going outside for anything that needs four wheels may lead to “Had I known.”

    What you should do when Buhari visits your city

    Flee the city

    The thought of Buhari drawing the same oxygen in the same city as you is not one you even want to entertain. Run.

    What you should do when Buhari visits your city

    ALSO READ: How Buhari Has Freed 1,629 “Repentant” Boko Haram Members

  • The Only Correct Way to Drive Your Car in Lagos State

    Driving in Lagos state is not the same as driving anywhere else in the world m. Here’s what you need to know if you want to learn how to drive correctly in Lagos. 

    1) Have a spare car in your compound

    Driving in Lagos means you should have a spare car in your house. Because if , the real owners of the car decide to help you bash it, will you now be left with nothing? If you want to drive and you don’t have a spare car, better enter a cab.

    2) Drop your sanity at home 

    Lagos roads are not a place for people with sound minds. They’re for people who have nothing to lose. When you decide to drive on a Lagos road, you need to embody the spirit of someone who can do anyhow at any time. Scary stuff, but it needs to be done. 

    3) Always have enough food stuff  in your car

    With traffic that often lasts longer than the will to live, you should always make sure that you have enough to cook. As a passenger, you can sleep and pretend to not be hungry. However, if you’re driving, you need all the energy. You fit make sharp-sharp amala

    RELATED: Interview With Lagos & Traffic: What God Has Joined Together

    4) Remember that you’re never wrong 

    In Lagos, everyone that drives is right. Even if they’re passing one-way or bashing your car, they’re right. You too need to embody the spirit of always being right. 

    5) LASTMA is your biggest opp 

    As you drive, have it at the back of your mind. LASTMA officers are out for blood, so don’t give them any. Complete papers, fire extinguisher, and whatever else they need. If not, the billing that’ll occur will wreck you. 

    RELATED: 13 Times LASTMA Did Oversabi

    6) Pedestrians are a suggestion 

    To drive in Lagos state, you don’t rate pedestrians. The road was not built with them in mind, so why will you drive with them in mind? 

    7) Refresh your insults vocabulary

    Every morning before you enter the road, refresh the insults in your vocabulary. Driving in Lagos means you have to be constantly innovating with your insultive creativity. 

    RELATED: 11 Annoying Nigerian Insults Kids Used to Say 

    8) Have your therapist on speed dial 

    Driving in Lagos will traumatise you, so you should have the person that’ll un-traumatise you. If you didn’t have a therapist before, better go and book one before you hit the road. 

    [donation]

  • Lagos Is Sodom and Gomorrah, and Here’s Why

    The Biblical Sodom and Gomorrah were burnt down because of the kinds of sins that happened there. However, what Doctor Strange didn’t see was that a city called Lagos was going to emerge in the future and pick up from where Sodom and Gomorrah stopped. Lagos didn’t just take a page from Sodom and Gomorrah’s handbook; it copied the whole assignment. 

    1. Lagos is this hot because Sodom and Gomorrah are still burning 

    Lagos is only this hot because the old cities are still on fire. Even when it rains, it’s hot. Lagos probably sprung up from the fire that burnt Sodom and Gomorrah to the ground. While God isn’t destroying Lagosians with direct fire, the heat has to be some sort of warning.

    2. Lagos is going to show you pepper

    If the heat from the sun hasn’t destroyed you, the pepper Lagosians are going to show you is going to cause complete destruction. You’ll see and taste the pepper when Lagos people are done dealing with you. We’re sure this is a Sodom and Gomorrah update sha. Sodom and Gomorrah Pro Max. The pepper isn’t atarodo; no, it’s wickedness raised to unimaginable powers. 

    reactions on Twitter: "guy lying in bed man dem wicked getting up but mi  wickeda dan dem https://t.co/Bjnvw8X9Km" / Twitter

    3. We’ve seen sin before, but the sin in Lagos is a discovery. 

    Don’t question where we got our data from. We aren’t sure the Sodomites (if that’s what they were called) committed half the sins going on in Lagos before they were wiped off the face of the earth. Lagosians saw the sins that were committed in Sodom and decided to make it their life’s mission to top them. 

    4. Lagosians and fornication are 5& 6. 

    The people of Sodom and Gomorrah liked to have sex — it’s probably one of the main reasons their city got burned down. There was someone in Sodom and Gomorrah taking notes of all the sex positions they tried out and the person dropped the notes in the new Lagos. Lagosians are building on all the fornication that happened in Sodom and Gomorrah. 

  • What She Said —  I Wish I Did More for Myself

    This week’s What She Said is Small Pepper, a 53-year-old Nigerian woman. She talks about moving to Lagos to make it in the 90s, the realities of supporting six younger siblings in 1992 as the first daughter and her transition into the money lending business to survive and become her own person.

    So, Small Pepper?

    Haha! My mama nicknamed me after my height and personality — I knew how to make trouble. I started helping her with sales and debt collection when I was 13 because I used to flare up like pepper, so she would tell me to help her harass customers owing her money for soft drinks. My father was always away because of his job as a police officer, so as the first daughter of eight children, I had to support my mum. I knew exactly how to harass her debtors into paying immediately. That’s how “Small Pepper” stuck.

    Did you ever have to hold anybody’s knicker to fight?

    I was too short to fight anybody oh. It was my mouth people always wanted to avoid. I remember a man that borrowed ₦50,000 from my mum and kept dodging her each time she went to his compound to look for him. She reported the matter to me and one morning, I strolled to his store where he sold palm wine. I waited till he went to the back of his shop, then seized the kegs of palm wine lined up in front of his shop. He obviously got the message because he turned up a few days later with the initial loan and profit for my mum. 

    Mad oh! Did this experience as “Small Pepper” play any role in your life as an adult?

    I worked at my mothers shop until I got admission into the University of Benin at 17. So that was five years of helping her manage the business and learning the art of buying and selling. These skills wass how I survived the madness of Lagos in 1992 without my family. 

    What happened in Lagos?

    I finished my NYSC at 23 and after my service in 1991, my family moved from Lagos when my father decided to retire from his job as a police officer. We moved to our hometown called Agbor, in Delta state and I hated it there. I was at home most of the time because there was little to do, but I needed to find a way to earn money to support my older brother and  six younger siblings. Naturally, I moved to Lagos to “make it big.”

    The Lagos Dream. How did that go?

    I was 24 and living without depending on my family for the first time. You had to be mad to survive. It was a place one could easily get lost, especially as a Johnny Just Come (JJC) like me. I remember entering the wrong bus going to Orile from Ojuelegba, misplacing my money and having to beg. In Lagos, everybody must beg a bus driver at least once. I once fell down on the road to weep after someone had emptied my bag on my way to Orile. I cried until people dashed my money. Knowing Lagos now, the thief could have been among the people dashing me money. 

    LOL.  Did you have a plan on how to make it big though? 

    I just knew I wanted to work. There was no big plan in my head besides getting to Lagos and getting a job — even as a secretary. So making it started out with squatting at my cousin’s house in Ajegunle. The same week I arrived, I went to look for my dad’s old colleague that had lived with us at the Police barracks in Ikeja years back. He was recently promoted to inspector general of police, so I hoped he would remember me and help me get a job.

    Did it work out?

    Yes. He connected me to a friend who owned a fruit drink company in Mushin, and I worked as his accountant. I didn’t know how much I was going to get paid, but I believed it was better than nothing. It was great until I got the first cheque for my salary: ₦5,000. Excitement for the job cleared from my eyes. As the first daughter, I had to support my retired parents. They never said it, but I knew they expected me to live up to the same responsibilities as my elder brother who also supported them. My mother’s business wasn’t even bringing in enough money to support sending my younger siblings to school at that point. So who could I support with ₦5,000? It just felt like an insult plus joke. I dropped the cheque on my desk and quit the job.

    Ah. I’m curious about what ₦5k could have gotten you in Lagos in 1992.

    It cost me at least ₦300 to get to Mushin from Ajegunle and back each day for the month. Then I would buy lunch for about ₦100 from Iya Bunmi. So that was about ₦400 everyday to just get to the office and eat for a month. If I had only myself to think of, maybe I could have managed it somehow. But I had six younger siblings that needed to go to school and my elder brother was also barely making it as a lawyer in Lagos. Even after sending money home, I still had to add in ₦1000 each month, at my cousin’s house. So I can’t relate to the jokes about how you could have survived with ₦100 in the 90’s, when there were people like me weighed down by the support they needed to give their families. So don’t always believe those ₦100 tales, ₦5k could have been just as little for a lot of my peers in the 90’s.

    Interesting. What did you do next?

    I decided to focus on what I knew I understood perfectly — being Small Pepper. I bought bras and pants from Obalende to resell to my working class friends. I can’t lie; it was difficult to accept the reality of selling underwear just to survive. I thought I was going to get one of those white collar jobs in the fancy offices my friends talked about in school, but it had to be done. I even got a Coca-Cola license to buy

    and sell drinks like my mama, but I just gave it to a friend that needed it more who had a shop already. 

    What was the hardest part about trying to get a job then?

    I kept reaching out to my father’s contacts to assist me with getting jobs in Lagos. In the 90s, success really depended on who your father knew and the calibre of men you mingled with. Surviving revolved a lot around the willingness of a man to help you. Any job I had back then involved depending on an uncle, distant male cousin or brother. It wasn’t the best feeling having to depend on people. I’ll never forget the way one of my dad’s contacts from the police force stared at me. I just knew it was better to be on the streets than go any further with my request. 

    So what did you do?

    Many things. It took almost five years for things to get better. A neighbour who also worked as a broker became my friend when I moved to Ojodu Berger in 1995. After he found out we were from the same tribe, he was interested in helping me learn to buy shares; I bought 500 units each from First Bank and Wema Bank. That’s how I started to understand how to run things in Lagos: you have to earn outside your 9-5 to have money to spend.
    I really started scaling through when I got into the banking sector in 1997. A friend connected me to a marketing position at International Trust Bank (now EcoBank). I got into the business of loaning money to individuals. I noticed some people came into the bank with ideas they needed to fund, but processing the loans took too long. So I decided to use the opportunity to set up a business that loaned money to the customers that couldn’t wait for the whole process. I offered a higher monthly interest rate, but people were willing to pay because it was a faster process. When the bank decided to retrench workers, I lost my job, but I kept all the customers I had and set up a proper loaning business in 2001. All my “Small Pepper” skills came to play here.

    LOL. You stole the bank’s customers?! 

    Look, every moment is a business potential and women are smart enough to see it. It’s just difficult to be bold about it sometimes. I couldn’t afford to desperately need anyone in the 90s. So that’s a moment in my life I would never change.

    Through all of this, what are you most proud of achieving?

    Being able to support my family as the first daughter. I had an older brother who came to Lagos as well and we both had to find our way so our six younger siblings didn’t have to struggle the way we did. Half of them are out of the country now, so I’d say those nights I could only afford a digestive biscuit to eat paid off.

    Do you have any regrets?

    I just wish I did more for myself even through the struggles of being in Lagos on my own. The goal was to never have to work again at some point. And that’s where I am right now. From depending on the men in my life to get jobs, to creating my own source of income loaning money to people like my mother back then. I’d say I did okay and I have no regrets leaving everything behind to come back to Lagos in 1992. I could’ve gotten myself more bags though. I wasn’t into make up or hair back then, but handbags? I loved them.