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  • BTS Is Officially on Hiatus, So What Next for Nigerian ARMY?

    I’m not the biggest Kpop stan, but even I felt the shock waves the official confirmation of BTS’ hiatus brought to the entire fandom. 

    Ugly tears are already flowing, but the group says they’ll reconvene in 2025 once their mandatory military service to South Korea is over. What’ll happen to BTS fans in Nigeria till then?

    They’ll cry, obviously

    Seriously, a whole three years till another BTS hit drops? Fix it, Jesus.

    Operation back-to-back streaming

    Since there won’t be new music for a while, we can hold the old ones tight. Thank God for last week’s BTS Yet to Come concert. They can hold on to the fresh memories of OT7 on stage, for the long road ahead.

    Or maybe, start a GoFundMe

    If there’s one thing about Nigerians, we love to throw money at people we love. Maybe if we raise enough, South Korea would decide to free BTS. Rules are meant to be broken, abi?

    They’ll prepare for the worst

    We’re so used to fake promises by Nigerian politicians that we automatically believe everyone is lying. Isn’t that how One Direction said they were only going on “break”? Where are they now?

    Attack haters

    Because we all know the ARMY has no chill. Anyone who talks anyhow, or says something stupid about the band never coming back, will definitely collect. Only antis and fake ARMY would even consider that.

    K-drama to the rescue

    At least there’s “K” inside. Again, only antis would listen to any other K-pop band while OT7 is on a break.

    If all fails, they’ll organise vigils

    Maybe prayer can help make the hiatus bearable as they supplicate for the Bangtan Boys’ safety.

    Let Zikoko tell you where the money at! Subscribe to the Money By Zikoko newsletter to get all the gist about how money moves in Nigeria, by Nigerians.

    NEXT READ: Top 7 BTS Music Videos Everyone Should Watch

    Tife Oni

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  • Now That Alchemy of Souls Is Over, Here’s Everything We’ll Miss

    Now that Alchemy of Souls is over, I’m terrified of what I’ll do with myself during the weekend. I also want to fight the Hong sisters for whatever that ending was. How could they have done this to us? In the spirit of choosing peace and hoping for a better finish to season two, here’s everything I’m going to miss from the show. 

    Mu-deok and Jang Uk’s banter

    I’ll miss all their stupid fights and arguments where Jang Uk almost always wins. I’ll miss them pretending that Jang Uk is the boss when we all know Mu-deok has more power in the relationship. I’ll miss Mu-deok talking about how she wants to kill everybody but ends up saving their lives. I’ll also miss watching Jang Uk and Mu-deok win every single time! My ultimate faves, I believe so much in their love that I choose not to remember the ending because what was that?

    RELATED: How to Write the Perfect Romantic K-drama Series

    Maidservant Kim and Park Jin’s relationship

    Something I didn’t expect was to enjoy seeing older people fall in love. You’d think since I watch a lot of K-drama, I’d be used to things like this by now. But I loved seeing them flirt, even though it was painful to witness. Maidservant Kim confessed her feelings, and Park Jin was still oblivious somehow. It was adorable. 

    Watching the crown prince be a weirdo

    This man was just unintentionally funny. He’s usually a character people would hate, but in Alchemy of Souls, there’s absolutely no reason to hate him. He cheated on a test for Mu-deok, was willing to find out the truth about the queen being a soul shifter at all costs and saved Mu-deok’s life on multiple occasions. Sad for him, he fell in love with the one person not even all his money could buy. I was still rooting for him, though. 

    Lady Jin’s eye makeup

    Half the time I watched this show, whenever she came up, I’d just whisper “bad bitch” under my breath because, wow. Using a graphic liner in the age of magic and keeping that makeup flawless is a trick only she could body. I mean, I saw this woman crying about her daughter, and all I could think about was how her makeup didn’t get smudged. A queen.  

    look at her!

    Master Lee musing

    Let’s not even talk about how he’s the most unserious character in this show low-key. This man always figures out everything before other people do. Maybe because he’s always thinking? Or maybe it’s because he is over 200 years old? He’s sha my fave because every supporter of Mu-deok’s antics is my fave. 

    Jin Mu breathing like he swallowed hot eba

    When you’re too busy doing evil things, of course your breathing would be laboured. Okay, that’s not a thing, but I’m glad it was Jin Mu’s thing. Wherever a new scene comes up and Jin Mu huffs and puffs, I always expected the worst. The way this man manipulated every single person around him is just legendary. 

    Dang-gu’s earrings 

    The way I hated his guts in All of Us Are Dead. They dressed everybody like they were in the Joseon era, but not quite, and Dang-gu came from nowhere with his K-pop idol earrings. I’m going to miss Yoo In-soo playing the role of Dang-gu. Do you know how good an actor you must be to get so many people to like you after killing their faves in an earlier movie?

    Hearing Jipsu, Ryusu, and Chisu

    Now that Alchemy of Souls has ended, where else will I hear people mention this? What if I also want to open up my gate of energy and master all three? While that might never happen, let’s just sit with that beautiful memory of Jang Uk using Chisu and Mu-deok’s blood to fight as we wait for season two. 

    READ ALSO: Wholesome K-Dramas You Should Watch With Your Parents

    Malakai Bassey

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  • Nigerians, Here’s a Basic Guide to K-Pop Speak

    I know you see a lot of K-pop edits on your timeline, whether or not you want to. We are legion, and we’re not going anywhere soon, so why not take a moment to understand half the shit we talk about? Here’s a crash course on essential K-pop lingo. You’re welcome.

    The big three

    If you learn nothing about K-Pop, know this one. There are a lot of K-Pop entertainment companies, but the most popular are: JYP Entertainment, SM Entertainment and YG Entertainment. They’re the oldest companies known for consistently producing some of the most successful acts in K-Pop history.


    RELATED: How to Spot a K-Pop Fan in Nigeria

    Bias

    A bias is a fan’s favourite member of a band. Multi stans have ‌ult-bias who’re their favourite member of all the groups they stan. It may not even be a member of their favourite group. 

    Comeback

    Simply put, it’s when a K-Pop group “comes back” with a new album.  Instead of saying a group released an album, we say they’re having a comeback. Before you ask, no, singles don’t count.

    Daesang

    A daesang is equal to an EGOT you win in one night. It’s the most significant achievement a K-Pop group or artist can have. They usually present this award at the two most important Korean music award shows: the Golden Disk Awards and the Seoul Music Awards. Now, you know.

    SNS

    SNS is how Koreans refer to social media, and  most stans pick it up and refer to all social media apps this way. 

    Aegyo 

    “Aegyo” means to behave cutely. It’s basically planned cuteness for fan service. So when you see a K-Pop idol make heart cheeks or shake like a puppy, that’s Aegyo. Don’t even judge us. It’s cute.

    Sasaeng

    You know how some people are busy-bodies and do too much? That’s a sasaeng. They stalk idols to know where they live, then break into their apartments so they always somehow have the idols’ belongings. These guys are unhealthily obsessed, and no one likes them.  

    Sunbae/Hoobae 

    Sunbae is a senior group that debuted before a younger group from the same company. Hoobae is the junior group of the Sunbae. For example, Girls Generation are Sunbae to Red Velvet and Aespa. Think of it as a  relationship between an egbon and an aburo. 

    Maknae

    The maknae is the youngest member of a group. Some of the most popular maknae are Lisa from Blackpink, Jungkook from BTS and I.N from Stray Kids. For New Jeans, they’re all Maknae, please. 

    Line

    A line is a group of people categorised together. We have a lot of these. The most popular, age line, is all idols from different or the same group born in the same year. BTS’ Jungkook and GOT7’s Yugyeom are both ’97 liners.

    In a group, there’s a dance and vocal line, made up of the main dancers or vocals of the group. 

    There’s also the rap line which, as you can guess, are the main rappers in the group.

    Finally, the visual line, the prettiest faces in the group. We usually like to say it’s all of them, but hmm. There are lines to categorise non-Korean members: Japanese line, Chinese line, Thai line. We also like to create fake ones, like “abs” line, as a joke. Wow, we’re so funny. 

    Killing part

    You know how you watch a movie and have that one scene you think was the best part? That’s what the killing part is. It could be a part of a song, choreography, a pose or even a perfectly timed beat drop fans love and never shut up about. 

    READ ALSO: Popular K-Pop Fandoms And How to Identify Them

    Malakai Bassey

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  • If You Have Any of These 8 Habits, You’re a K-drama Addict

    If you notice that you’ve been making any of the gestures mentioned in this article for a while, you’re not alone. But remember not to do some of them in public sha. 

    Covering your mouth when you laugh

    Koreans cover their mouth when they laugh as a sign of respect. If you’ve watched a lot of K-drama, you may have copied this habit subconsciously. Sha don’t do it in front of older Nigerians before they tell you that you think their mouth is smelling. 

    RELATED: Every K-Drama Fan Should Know These Basic Korean Phrases

    Slapping your head

    In K-drama, the main characters slap their heads a lot. As a Nigerian, adopting this would probably come easy because older people have randomly hit your head since you were a child to date, what difference does it make if you now do it on your own? Make sure you say, “Aish,” after slapping your head for added effect. 

    Flicking peoples heads 

    Flicking people’s heads is the Korean version of knocking someone’s head in a friendly manner in Nigeria. Does it hurt? Yes, but it’s not your fault you learned bad thing. Everybody go dey alright. 

    Clapping when you laugh 

    As a k-drama fan, it’s not strange to find yourself clapping while you laugh. No, you haven’t been possessed. You’re just copying what you’ve been watching. As a Nigerian sha, be careful how you do it outside before they think you’ve lost your mind. 

    Throwing the peace sign

    One day you saw your favourite character in a drama series throw the peace sign, and now you can’t pose for a single picture without doing the same. Don’t worry. You’re not alone. Plus, it’s super cute.

    Making a heart with your whole body

    The transition from doing this as a K-drama fan to a K-pop fan is insane. All your friends are sick of you posing this way in every picture. Not us, though. We’d take pictures with you any day.

    Making two fists and shouting, “Fighting!”

    You can’t imagine yourself cheering someone on without making a fist and shouting, “Fighting!” as loud as you can. How else will your friends know that you believe in them? 

    Bowing your head before receiving things from people 

    People probably think you’re the most respectful person they’ve ever met, especially if you live in a Yoruba-dominated city. But don’t overdo it sha, because some people deserve to be disrespected. Don’t let your head stop you from giving it to them hot-hot.

    ALSO READ: The Ultimate Nigerian K-drama Fan Starter Pack

    Malakai Bassey

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