Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the wordpress-seo domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /home/bcm/src/dev/www/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121
Job hunting | Zikoko!

Quizzes

Stacks

Shows

Podcasts

Newsletters

Naira Life

Love Life

Hustleprint

Love Currency

Sunken Ships

What She Said

My Bro

So You Don’t Have To

Interview With…

Zikoko Memes

Jollof Road

Cholera Outbreak Update

Follow our socials

  • Unconventional Ways to Find a Job in 2023

    Call and ask to confirm your interview time

    Skip the part where you apply to a thousand jobs without getting a reply. Call the companies directly and tell them you want to confirm your interview time. Chances are, they’ll be too lazy to check if they actually sent you anything.

    Find their email address and send them an interview invite

    If you’ve already applied, be proactive and send them an interview invitation, so they know you mean business. Companies always say they want proactive people. Show yourself.

    Offer them fuel

    If they have an office, then they need to keep the lights on. Offer them free fuel as a perk for hiring you. You’ll leave them no choice but to hire you with joy.

    Offer to pay them a salary instead

    What better way to prove to them that you’re not doing it for the money than to offer them money?

    Become a POS attendant

    You’re going straight from being unemployed to being self-employed. Even better, you’re handling plenty cash every day. What more do you want?

    Become a Wizkid stan

    Being a part of Wizid FC is a full-time job, and the best part about it is that you don’t have to apply. Just start working. You might get stressed out every once in a while sha but the job is the job. Another option is to just become Davido’s online defender for the week. But you’ll be doing a lot of overtime sha.

    Shoot your shot at your future employer

    No, we’re not asking you to send them a DM on LinkedIn. Instead, find their IG handle and slide into their DMs with as much rizz as you can. Ask them on a date, then go with your CV. They’ll be impressed by your focus.

    NEXT READ: 7 Ways To Make Money Without Working For It

    Sheriff Alimi

    , , , ,
  • We Asked 7 Nigerians for the Biggest Lies They’ve Told on Their CVs

    We know so many people lie on their CVs. It’s a normal thing at this point. It’s all seen as part of the employment hustle. So, we spoke to seven Nigerians, and they told us the biggest lies they’ve told on their CVs.

    “I said I’d worked with over 10 organisations”

    Lola, 30

    “I lied that I’d worked in over 10 organisations over a span of three years. It’s not my fault. I was desperately looking for a job, so I just manufactured companies and put them on my CV. Out of all of them, I’d only worked with two in real life. The rest were imaginary companies with no other employees except me.”

    “I lied that I can work under pressure”

    Rasheed, 25

    “When I was writing a CV for my last job, I was honestly just freestyling with my soft skills. I kept adding anything that came to my mind because I thought, last last, I’ll run it. That’s how I went to mention I can work under pressure. I think God punished me for lying by making me get the job because the pressure I faced can make some people cry.”

    “I lied that I organised a virtual conference of over 1000 attendees”

    Amaka, 25

    “I once put it on my CV that I had some event planning experience with a virtual conference that had over 1000 attendees. Both the conference and the attendees were made up. But nobody should stress me, please.”

    “I said I helped two organisations increase their social media visibility by 3x”

    Sola, 27

    “I don’t even know if I’ll call this a lie. I did work for those organisations as a social media manager sha, but I didn’t increase any visibility anywhere o. Moving your page from 10 followers to 30 followers is still 3x visibility, no? But then, I like to think of it like this: three times zero is still zero. So, technically, I didn’t lie. I just massaged the truth a little bit.”

    “I wrote an entire role description for a job I didn’t even do”

    Josephine, 23

    “When I was in university, I worked at a company owned by a relative for my SIWES programme. To be honest to God in heaven, I wasn’t doing anything meaningful there. I was just going to watch Big Brother Naija everyday. But when I updated my CV, I just added everything that was in the role description, whether or not I did them in real life.

    I said I onboarded new clients, held sessions with new employees, received inbound calls, yada yada yada. Everything, dust.”

    “I said I was proficient in SQL”

    John, 26

    “I was actively looking for a data analyst position at the time, and I just added any skill remotely related to the job. Whether or not I even knew the first thing about them was none of my business. I kept saying I’ll learn on the job when I find it. And I knew enough about some of these skills to sound like I was actually proficient in real life sha. 

    When I got the job, it became a race between my workload and my brain. Every night, I was sleeping on YouTube trying to figure stuff out. I learnt in the end sha, and actually became proficient. But I don’t think it was worth the stress of lying.”

    “I created my own company to make it seem like I wasn’t freelancing”

    Damola, 22

    “I’m a software engineer, and even though I have a bit of formal work experience, I’d done some freelance work for over a year. The issue is companies abroad didn’t really like hiring freelancers. Maybe it has to do with the assumption that you’ll keep doing gigs while working for them. 

    I was looking for a remote job at the time, so to cover up the freelancing part, I just created a company and said it was an agency so we worked on different projects. The projects were real, but the ‘company’ really only existed to disguise the fact that I was freelancing. 

    I’m applying for another remote job now, and I mistakenly sent in an old CV that says I’ve freelanced before. I’m just waiting for my L, secretly hoping that it never comes.”

    NEXT READ: Let’s Not Lie, These Life Skills Should Be in Your CV

    Sheriff Alimi

    , , ,
  • 8 Sure-fire Ways to Land Your Dream Job

    First off, no normal person dreams of labour. Yes, we said it. However, man’s gotta eat.  

    Since we get multiple stories about terrible job experiences as well as the best work experiences, we decided to share the sure ways to land your dream job. You’re welcome.

    1. Take the company’s name to the mountain

    Why bother sending out CVs when you can simply pick out the company you want and fire prayers on them? Any mountain will do.

    Tech Unicorn, locate me by fire.

    2. Offer sacrifices

    If prayer is not your thing, just look for a Nollywood-esque calabash and get creative with the content. For the best results, include your dream company’s name on a piece of paper, pour red oil on it and drop it at a T-junction. Just don’t let anyone catch you.

    Drop it at night, for obvious reasons.

    3. Shout, “Do you know who I am?” at the interview

    If you do land an interview and you notice it isn’t going well, just stand up and start beating your chest as if your bank deducted your last 1k. Got it? Then start shouting, “Do you know who I am?” Since most Nigerians are wired to fall at the feet of rich and violent people, this hack will work eight out of ten times.

    RELATED: Recruiters Share Their Worst Experiences at Job Interviews

    4. Spam their social media accounts

    Locate the company’s social media accounts and fill the comment sections with your name and email address. They will admire your tenacity and make you CEO.

    5. Rent a billboard

    You want to catch the attention of as many people as possible and show that you can think out of the box. Isn’t that what all job vacancies require?

    6. Kidnap their HR and demand your dream role as a ransom

    If they’re proving stubborn, find their HR personnel and kidnap them. Trust us. It’ll be easier for them to offer you a job than pay a monetary ransom.

    7. Announce your dream job on LinkedIn

    Fake it till you make it — or whatever Shakespeare said. It doesn’t matter that you haven’t even interviewed with them. Just announce that you’ve joined their team on LinkedIn, and they will look for you.

    8. Just resume

    If all else fails, just carry your bags and sit outside their gate. In the event that they don’t arrest you, they’ll notice your determination and offer you a job on the spot.

    READ THIS NEXT: Stress-Free Jobs You Can Do After Beyoncé Makes You Quit Your 9 to 5

    Tife Oni

    , ,
  • Before You Accept Another Job Offer, Ask These 7 Questions

    Earlier this week, job-hopping was a conversation that trended on Twitter. While valid points were raised on the importance of long-term building in an organisation, the comment section also highlighted the unexpected reality that influences the cycle of switching jobs.

    So, with all that was said about the difficult working conditions in organisations, what are the questions you should ask as a Nigerian before you accept a job offer and switch jobs? Read on.

    1. Werey dey disguise?

    Is the job description the one you applied for? Don’t go and apply to be a data analyst and be helping oga buy amala every morning. That’s all I’ll say. 

    2. Will you eat exposure?

    Before you move, ask yourself if the money is worth it. Exposure is great, but you can see that the price of sardine is never coming down. You can kuku see the fuel scarcity happening now so try to negotiate for at least a 10% jump before you move dear.  

    3. Will you be rolling with the big boys?

    There’s “exposure” that exposes you to nonsense and there’s exposure that takes your portfolio to the next level. Be sure about which one the company guarantees. If there is no significant increase in your salary, will you at least get to work with the big boys of the industry?  And will you gain value from it?

    4. Are your village people operating there too?

    Sometimes, the village people are the ones that have refused to retire. Start off with checking social media for the profiles of your potential colleagues. If any of them have spent five to ten years in the same position without any sign of moving forward, run oh. 

    5. Will their workload send you to an early grave?

    In other words, will you be a camel or a team member? Ask about the capacity of the organisation and dig into the number of people in each department. Jesus already died; nobody should come and kill you.

    6. Are you re-applying to be a slave?

    I know we’re all slaves to capitalism, but there are also levels to this slavery thing. Ask about the working hours and the compensation structure for overtime work. If you’re feeling jiggy, you can tell them you’d like to start your own week on Tuesday. 

    7. Is it the ghetto?

    Don’t allow, “We have a vibrant working environment,” to deceive you. Shine your eyes because people have worked in the trenches in this country. To avoid stories that touch, ask if there are facilities like a standby generator and WI-FI to work.

    Hopefully, after asking these seven questions, you’ll be able to avoid moving from frying pan to fire in this dungeon we call capitalism.

    Goodluck.

    Ortega

    , ,
  • 6 Ways To Answer “Why Do You Want To Work For Us?”

    If you’ve ever applied for a job or had a job interview, we’re sure you’ve had to answer “why do you want to work for us?” or some variation.

    Here are some ways to answer it when next you have to:

    1. “Because you’re hiring”

    Just tell them that it’s because they’re hiring and that they shouldn’t stress you. Instead of them to be happy that somebody wants to work for them, they’re busy asking JAMB question.

    2. “I need money”

    Everybody needs money, and you’re no exception. Why else would you be there?

    3. “To shame my enemies”

    After your step mother and Iya Asake swore for you that you will not get a job till you turn 50, you want to shame them. They should help you prove to them that your God is bigger than them.

    4. “To prove my Primary 4 teacher wrong”

    Tell them you want to prove your Primary 4 teacher wrong for saying you won’t make it in life. That you want to work for them so you can have money to buy a car and splash rain water on that lying teacher.

    5. “I want to help you”

    Tell them it’s because you’re trying to help their life. They’re looking for employee, you’re looking for employer. They should help you help them.

    6. “Why shouldn’t I want to work for you?”

    This is honestly the best response. Fire them back with “why shouldn’t I?” Ask them if they’re hiding something and what they’re hiding. Abi they think it’s only them that can ask question.

    Tuntamilore

    ,
  • 4 Queer Nigerians Tell Us What It Is Like Job Hunting

    The experiences of queer people any and everywhere are far from monolithic. Oppression takes many forms and, sometimes, the fact that you can or cannot pass as a member of a non-marginalised community is what determines how much or what type of oppression/marginalisation gets thrown your way. 

    Passing, in the simplest terms, is the ability of a member of a marginalised group to look like they are not from that group. For example, a gay person can be considered to be straight-passing if, based on stereotypes, other people can’t tell they are gay.

    We asked four queer people who are visibly queer and are non-passing what it was like job-hunting.

    Frank, 27.

    I recently made a switch to working for tech startups and the culture is more accepting of my “eccentricities” and queerness, but with traditional companies, job hunting was hell. People would ask questions about my nails, piercings etc. I kept trying to point out that these things weren’t limiting the value I would bring. I would show my certificates and portfolio but nope. I started working for remote companies, especially non-Nigerian ones. 

    Ugu, 24.

    I am a masc-presenting woman, and I think it upsets men. One time, I applied for a job and the person asking the interview questions asked why I was dressed like a tomboy and said they like “their women” looking fine and attractive. I was shocked. I was glad when I didn’t get the job. Another time, during my undergrad days, I went for an internship interview, and I was the only woman employed — there were four other interns. During the interview, they kept making jokes about how the only woman they were employing isn’t really a woman. Job hunting is a minefield. You spend the whole time dealing with subtle and even blatant homophobia, disregard and so much more. Imagine what it is like when people look at you and all they see is your queerness.

    Ronke, 29.

    I don’t know why I assumed being a creative would make navigating the job market better or easier to navigate the job market when you looked different. However I came to that conclusion, it was quickly disproved. The first job I had was being a social media manager for a store, and when I resumed, they told me not to bring those friends of mine. I was confused by that statement, then someone told me that the owner had gone through my Instagram and saw me “being a lesbian”. The owner remained passive-aggressive towards me till I left. 

    Another time, I was working in the marketing department of a bank and my superior told me it was important to be sexy as a marketer, so I might want to lose the T-shirt. Luckily I got fired a while after. I say luckily because I joined the place I’m at now right after, and it has been blissful. 

    Ayo, 21.

    Job hunting is the absolute ghetto. I’ve been lucky enough to have only done it twice and only for a few months at a stretch, but it was horrible. I think the worst thing is how employers and people in charge of hiring feel that because you need or want a job, it is okay for them to talk to you anyhow. I am one of those people who you can guess their sexuality by looking at them. I look and sound and walk gay. It is easy to clock me. And that just means it is easy to be homophobic, and Nigerians never let the opportunity to be homophobic pass them by. I was an intern at this place, and I ran a lot of errands. They made comments about the way I walk and how tights my jeans were all the time.

    [ad]

    Desmond

    , , ,
  • 5 ANNOYING Things Every Nigerian Student Hates About Job Hunting

    Job hunting is hard enough as it is, but doing that while still a student? Hell. If you have ever had to look for a job while in school, then this post is for you. Warning: painful content ahead

    1) Degrees

    Every single job opening is looking for someone with a degree. Some even want people with two or three degrees. Honestly, why can they not just manage the fact that some of us do not one yet? Please, employers, consider us

    2) Job Experience

    We do not have the degree, is it now job experience we can produce from nowhere? Hire me and give me the experience. I command you!

    3) Age

    Jobs will list that they are looking for people not less than 25, and you with your 19 year old birth certificate will just be there wondering why your parents did not get it on sooner. Pain, that is all we know. We blame all the people that call youths future leaders. Let us lead now.

    4) Schedule

    You cannot search for JUST any job, you need one that matches your schedule because you are a busy person. The kind of jobs available will now usually be around the time Prof Ahmadi sets tests. Questions will now begin to be asked. School or money? Decisions, decisions.

    5) Pay

    You finally get the job, and what do they want to pay you with? Vibes and exposure. They will tell us if we can pay for the things we use with vibes or exposure. Rubbish.

    Itohan Esekheigbe

    ,
  • Job Hunting In Nigeria: 4 Annoying Staples of The Process

    Everyone who has ever gone job hunting in Nigeria will tell you that it’s so terrible, that they’d have rather help Hercules with his 12 labours than do it again. It’s an incredibly shitty experience made worse by potential employers who are out to:

    • Exploit wide-eyed, fresh graduates who don’t know any better.
    • Take advantage of the desperation of the ones who have already been in the job market for a while (thanks to Nigeria’s unemployment levels).

    Here are 4 annoying staples of job hunting in Nigeria that almost everyone will come across at some point in their career.

    1) Every job opening you find asking for applicants with experience:

    The question you’ll ask yourself after encountering this a couple of times is “How am I supposed to get any experience if no one will hire me?!”. Some employers will even add shit like “FRESH GRADUATE with TWO YEARS EXPERIENCE” just so their ads will show up in more places.

    Those employers probably haven’t given it much thought but they’re going to hell.

    2) Potential employers requesting for people with experience and then offering them peanuts:

    After gathering hundreds of hopeful job applicants who’ve been gaining experience for years and putting them through Philoctetes-style tests, some potential employers (who don’t fear God) then proceed to offer the applicants who made it through salaries so small that actual peanuts would be better.

    3) Unrealistic job requirements with a side of pointless ageism:

    “Looking for applicants with at least 12 years of experience Masters degree. Applicants must be no older than 25.”

    BITCH HOW?!

    It’s hard enough getting into a university early in this country. Then if you manage to do that, ASUU’s neverending beef with the government will cause so many strikes that your four-year course could take you almost double that time to finish. So where exactly do these people expect to find a 25-year-old with 10 years experience? Also, what stops a 32-year-old from doing the same job? WHAT?!

    4) Scam job interview emails:

    These ones take advantage of desperate job seekers. I don’t know how they get the email addresses but they send a mass email to hundreds (maybe thousands) of people asking them to come to some shady as hell neighbourhood for a job interview. Victims of these scams have returned with different stories. Some were robbed, almost kidnapped, almost recruited into shitty marketing jobs for GNLD etc.

    The key here is to not go for an interview at a place you know damn well you didn’t apply. You’re not that lucky.

    Speaking of job hunting in Nigeria, the latest episode of our show, Nigerians Talk, tackles this topic. A group of Nigerian youth spoke about their job hunting experiences and they ranged from “lol” to “Jesus Christ”. Watch the video below:

    Now that you’ve hopefully finished watching the video, click here to access a form you can use to give us feedback on how to make to show better.

    Astor George


  • What happens when people suddenly lose their jobs due to COVID-19 (thanks, but no thanks 2020) or circumstances beyond their control? For many people in Nigeria, life gets tough. Make that tough because it’s already the ghetto over here.

    We got 5 people to share their job hunting chronicles with us, and honestly, the struggle is real!

    Read on.

    Yetty

    It was my first job after school and I was just really grateful that I had a job, even though it was the absolute worst. My boss called me one day and explained that they weren’t making money and so couldn’t sustain the staff strength. He added that since he had been spending his personal money on the company, he wanted to invest in something else and would have to let me go.

    This happened in February.

    One thing I regret is that I have nothing to show for a year’s work in terms of funds. I didn’t have income insurance. I wasn’t earning much either; had to pay rent in Lagos, feed, and take care of basic stuff. Looking for a job has been stressful. Before losing my job, I was trying to transition into a new career entirely and I’ve been studying and all. But you know how the job market is, they ask for three years of experience for entry-level roles and even internships (all my life, I always thought internships were meant for one to learn and acquire skills). So yeah, it’s been very hard.


    Jeph

    I was working in this place where I was handling Marketing. Frankly, I loved my colleagues and the impact of our work. The CEO on the other hand, I didn’t like very much. He paid little to no attention to employee welfare and would stress the life out of you. The work hours were terrible and he’d call at ungodly hours. I once resigned and he begged me to stay. He wouldn’t let me go on leave because I was a “key man risk”. He never increased salaries the three years I worked with him.

    At the beginning of the COVID-19 lockdown, I had to work overtime to ensure that the business ran as smoothly as possible. Still, no raise. There was even the risk of a pay cut. One Sunday, I didn’t pick this man’s call because I was asleep. When I did, oga said I was acting stupidly, and that at my age, he was running a business worth ₦22 million so I should stop being irresponsible.

    I waited for my salary and I resigned in March last year (2020), but the drama lingered till October. He wanted to punish me with handover like he’d usually do to others and I ignored him. I instead requested for my statutory payments to be made and he ignored me until I sent him an email. They finally responded that they were going to pay up, but then they sent a lawyer to me saying I threatened them and I should come to sign an undertaking. This was about 3 months post-resignation. They also said I obstructed their revenue inflow by not handing over and some other nonsense like that. Then went on to threaten to sue me for $36000 and 4 Million Naira. Thing is, their claims were frivolous and asides from that, I was never given an employment letter and wasn’t bound by any contract terms to follow any set procedures. I sha had my lawyer do the talk with theirs till I never heard from them again. I have sha learnt the importance of knowing the labour laws, work insurance and how to handle employment contracts.


    Temi

    I resigned o.

    I was working for a bunch of companies and one particular day I just typed my resignation letter and sent it the next week to most of them at the same time because I was tired. How would I be having thirteen-hour meetings, and they’ll still schedule a meeting for the next day!? It didn’t make sense to me. I was juggling like 9 companies at the same time including my travel agency thing. It was a lot. I was always tired and never even got much sleep. I’m job hunting, but not totally unemployed. I already found a job in the U.S. Getting it was very difficult and my contract will be over in 4 months. I’m sending my resignation to the remaining companies by the end of the week.


    Chuks

    I’m out of a job, and it actually hasn’t been easy. Although, I haven’t really been applying for long. Let’s say from the beginning of the year I’ve sent over 20 applications and I haven’t gotten any invites yet. Even when I managed to get invited to one, it sounded like a fraud. I was so tired because it was evident that the guy who put out the advert meant to defraud job seekers.
    In addition to this, my mum feels like I don’t want to go get a job, and I’m comfortable staying at home which sucks.
    I think it’s due to the fact that I started my own brand and she wants immediate monetary results. I keep telling her that it’s a whole different process, and doesn’t just happen like magic. Parents just see ‘pressing of phone and laptop’ as a waste of time. In my opinion, they need to change their mentality, lol.


    Ije

    I freelance in Digital Marketing and Brand Strategy. Sometimes, I pitch to brands or wait for them to approach me. I’ve not been on a campaign for like 6 months now, so it’s been really difficult trying to lay my hands-on jobs. The ones I get, sometimes when I reach out to them, they always promise to get back to me but don’t.

    Omo. The financial strain has been really terrible, I won’t lie. I don’t get funds from home like that and most times, the only thing I depend on to sustain myself are funds I get from jobs. People hit me up for Social Media Management once in a while, but sometimes something comes up and they’re not able to complete the deal. It has made my finances terrible. Right now, I don’t even think I want to go through the stress of looking for jobs again, I am tired. It’s draining and exhausting. If the jobs come, good because at this point I just feel like all my efforts are fruitless. I don’t know what else to do. In as much as that’s a mood, I can’t just dey. I’ll still pitch to brands and companies even if I said I won’t. It’s just generally discouraging.





    Employers or even employees themselves invested in insuring their income hasn’t been normalised in Nigeria. It is this vacuum Casava is trying to fill with its Income Protection Insurance. Casava’s motivation stems from the ever-rising unemployment rate in Nigeria and the fact that this has plunged many people into financial distress.

    In a nutshell, Casava helps you earn after losing your job, save money on healthcare and insure every other thing you care about. Get early access.



    Susan Nwaobiala

    , , ,