gadgets | Zikoko!

Apple has broken the internet again, and this time, it’s not because they teased the 78th iPhone upgrade. They unveiled Vision Pro; an augmented reality 3D headset that’s bound to put people’s bank accounts on life support when it eventually hits the market.

But what if Apple launches it in Nigeria first? Here’s what we think will happen.

Fresh material for our parents’ WhatsApp BCs

The moment it hits the market, you’ll start seeing BCs about how augmented reality is actually affecting your brain. Our parents never even let us sit too close to the TV, you now want to put it right “inside” your eyes? It won’t work.

And the Nigerian police

If every iPhone user is a potential yahoo boy in the eyes of the Nigerian police, it means someone who can afford a ₦2.6 million+ headset is a ritual killer. In summary, prepare to be stopped by police if you wear it out.

People will start making TikToks with it

Your faves would start pushing “unbox my new Apple Vision Pro with me” and “test my new headset” content down our throats. Where una dey see this money?

Baddies will turn it into a fashion statement

You know how iPhone users constantly try to choke us with mirror selfies? It’d be nothing compared to what rich kids and baddies will use our eyes to see when they lay hands on this headset—going to buy bread? Vision Pro. Going to braid hair? Vision Pro.

Users will start adorning it with chains and padlocks

People already steal airpods and snatch wigs. Is it this one they won’t steal? To avoid stories of, “They snatched my Vision Pro in Balogun Market”, Nigerians would start securing theirs to their head with chains and padlocks.

The Nigerian version will hit the streets

It’s not piracy, it’s just creativity. Why spend ₦2.6 million+ on Vision Pro when you can get “Vison Por” with ₦30k?

It’ll turn to owambe souvenir

Because everyone knows there’s nothing Yoruba people won’t share in the name of owambe souvenir. If they can share fuel during fuel scarcity, what is Vision Pro?

People will eventually abandon it at home

Because where are we even going to see the light or fuel to even charge it?

NEXT READ: 7 Things You Should Know About the Apple Vision Pro AR/VR Headset

Tife Oni

June 6, 2023

Inside Life

apple vision pro, Funny, gadgets, Nigeria, tech
Most Lagosians have a Computer Village story; some are hilarious and others are terrifying. They range from buying a phone and seeing semo inside the box when you get home, to having someone shake your hand and realising five minutes later that your phone is gone. If you have a Computer Village horror story, you can probably relate to these seven stages:

You suddenly realise your phone is missing

Maybe it’s your first time here, so you’re wondering why everyone is hissing at you, trying to get you to see the new gadget they’re selling. And you can’t tell why this particular guy keeps following you everywhere even though you’ve told him off. He eventually leaves you alone, and a few minutes later, you realise your pocket feels lighter.

Doubt sets in

At this point, your mind starts racing and running double-checks. “Did I put my phone in my bag?” You check your bag, and it’s not there. Then, you realise what’s happening — your phone is long gone.

You start to have flashbacks

Your mind flashes back to the guy who was following you. “Could it be him? Did he touch my pocket?” You decide the only way to find out is to find him and ask.

You start searching for the thief

You retrace your steps to the place where you last saw this person, hoping to see them again. But when you don’t see them, you start asking around, trying to describe them to other people. Miraculously, you’re pointed in a particular direction.

ALSO READ: The Zikoko Guide to Surviving Computer Village

You decide to confront the person

You get there, and you see the person you’re looking for. You approach them and ask politely if they took your phone. Unknown to you, this is a cardinal sin. You simply do not ask a thief whether they’ve stolen from you. They start shouting at you, with the familiar “who you be?”

You realize that words alone cannot settle this issue

Like the Lagosian you are, you decide the best way to go about this is to show some craziness. Obviously, that’s the only way they’ll listen to you, so you start to shout and throw punches like Bash Ali’s protege.

You get beaten really bad

Unfortunately, you’re not Bash Ali’s protege. You get whopped really bad and no one even cares to listen to the reason why you were shouting in the first place. You now realise what a bad idea this was and decide to leave without your phone.

You realise it’s not only your phone that was stolen

You get to the bus stop, but just as you’re about to take a bus home in pain and regret, you realise your wallet is now also gone.

READ THIS NEXT: “In Computer Village, Every Day, New Drama” — A Week in the Life of a Computer Vendor

Sheriff Alimi

July 2, 2022

Inside Life

computer village, gadgets, phone
This quiz will help fish out the Gen Zs in our midst and remind us of simpler, better times.

Meyimi O.

June 23, 2022

Generation Wars, Quizzes

gadgets, Gen Z, Nigerians
A Week in the Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject of today’s “A Week In The Life” is a businessman who sells electronic gadgets for a living. He talks about his unconventional approach to business, being dealt with by the exchange rate and why he’s considering getting a 9-5.

MONDAY:

Today was a rough day. I woke up late, got delayed in Lagos traffic and had to pursue dispatch riders up and down. On top of that, I also had to figure out where to buy dollars at an affordable rate so I could restock my goods.

Between clueless bank officials, CBN’s ever-changing policies and dispatch riders, I had my hands full in fire fighting mode.

Frustrated by the bank, I spent a huge part of the day on the internet looking for someone who wanted to send naira home. Then I also spent some time recalculating the cost of my goods and giving room for price fluctuations.

In the middle of this, I kept on getting calls from customers asking for their goods, and dispatch riders complaining about one problem or the other.

When I could no longer bear the information overload, I put my phone on silent, paused all notifications, and went to cool my head.

I just told myself that tomorrow is another day to try again.

TUESDAY:

I run my gadget business unconventionally. I don’t own a physical store, nor have social media presence or even hold on to stock for long. I work mostly based on word of mouth referrals. I take custom orders to help people buy phones on eBay, Amazon or from trusted dealers. And when I buy stuff for myself, I sell everything off at computer village. I don’t keep any stock.

I don’t know why I’m like this. Maybe it’s because I’m not crazy about the idea of owning a store, or perhaps it’s because I dislike the processes that come with keeping stock.

My method is less stressful because I can fulfill orders on my phone. I also have a car to drive around for pickups and occasional deliveries.

I’ve been running this business like this for over 10 years, so I guess I’m doing something right. In recent times, though, the business hasn’t been as good as it used to be. I’ve gone from making 10-20% on a phone sale to making 5-8%. This means that if I used to make ₦25,000 on one sale, I now make around ₦8,000.

I blame two things: high exchange rates and losing my customer base to japa. While I don’t have the answer to stopping my customers from running away, I’d rather not dwell on the dollar matter. I don’t want to sound like a broken record.

Today, I’m going to personally deliver all the goods the dispatch riders failed to deliver yesterday. The thought of the traffic I’m going to face is discouraging me from leaving the comfort of my bed.

WEDNESDAY:

Well, I guess that there’s something in the air this week. First, I woke up to an email from Amazon saying that they had blocked my account and frozen my money. According to them, I had too many “suspicious” card activities. They didn’t even give me a chance to explain that because I’m always sourcing for affordable dollar rates, I have to use different cards from my family and friends abroad.

This afternoon, my agent called to say that my goods were experiencing delays at the port. A few minutes later, customers who had paid upfront started calling me to ask for their property. There I was, caught between not wanting to lie and not wanting to give excuses.

Well, since you asked, my day went perfectly well. How was yours?

THURSDAY:

I’m up early today, not for work but to think. In recent times, business has been slow. What was once a sweet business with highs and lows now has a lot more lows. And the hoops to jump through keep on increasing.

Now, I’m considering getting a job that serves as a safety net.

But what are the prospects out there for someone who hasn’t worked in a formal job for more than 8 months in 10 years?

I’m definitely not doing anything that requires me to submit a CV or write one foolish essay or test. . Tech sounds nice but I don’t want to code. Maybe I’ll do hardware…

Truthfully, my ideal job is one where I’m helping people solve their gadget problems. Just text me that your laptop has a problem or you’re unsure of what laptop to buy and watch me light up. Not sure what phone to get? I’m your guy. You want someone to give IT support? Na me.

I’m honestly a bit confused and my head hurts from all the thinking I’ve had to do this week.

Wo, I don’t know what the future holds, but I’m grateful for the life I currently have.

Regardless of how my job search turns out, I know I have no regrets about running a business.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

Hassan Yahaya

January 18, 2022

Hustle

businessman, computer village, dollars, gadgets, hustle
In today’s world, Earbuds have become way more than high quality listening accessories meant for music alone, they’ve become lifestyle gadgets that play important roles in every aspect of our lives.

AirPods form an input in our fashion; we sometimes wear them to complement our outfit and make a fashion statement without necessarily using them to listen to music whilst on the go. And why wouldn’t we? Honestly, they look really cool in all the shades in which they come. In many cases, they’re also a major part of our gym, work, yoga, and relaxation kit. The importance of this smart accessory now transcends the traditional use scenarios and having to live without them could sometimes feel like torture. Earbuds have seen massive improvement since they first surfaced.

Despite this, smart accessory makers are still working hard to ensure that they keep switching things up to give consumers a better experience year after year, and oraimo has been at the fore front of this movement.

Everyone’s raving about the new noise cancellation feature

oraimo recently launched the FreePods 3 and the acceptance from Nigerians has been mind-blowing. One major feature on this new release that has got many people talking is the environmental noise cancellation feature. What is ENC ANC (Active Noise Cancellation) is a popular earbud feature, responsible for blocking out external noise to ensure that users have the clearest and richest voice call experience when they have their earbuds on and are in call mode.

However, oraimo has taken its noise cancellation offering a notch higher with the new FreePods 3. Joining conference calls with clients and teammates whilst stuck in a gridlock traffic in Lagos could be a nightmare. Even with glasses wound up, you can never guarantee that you can keep the bellowing voices of Lagos conductors from slipping into your meeting as soon as you switch on your mic. It’s the same thing with having to speak with your mum or a loved one and give them a progress report on how your day has been. However, with the new FreePods 3, all of that is changing swiftly. This time, oraimo has configured the Environmental Noise Cancellation(ENC) feature to kick into action automatically when you’re in speaking mode.

For sound, oraimo has introduced an all-new exclusive sound technology called HavyBass, the oraimo exclusive bass boost system, which will be applied in oraimo audio products. They have collaborated with world class audio engineers who used to work in Harman Kardon, to deliver the best sound quality. Conscious of the fact that Africans like bass, they have also made the 2baba tuned version great for afrobeat.

What does this mean for you, you ask? No more unwanted sounds sipping into your audio conference work calls or checkup calls to mum or bae.

Like face-to-face conversation

Have a feel of being in the same space with whoever is on the other side of the call. The FreePods 3 comes with 4-mic beamforming technology to track and provide high-quality voice signal. It also uses an AI Deep Neural Network algorithm to reduce surrounding noise. oraimo gives so much more While other recently released AirPods have recorded success in the water resistance department, many have nimbly ignored the area of noise cancellation is speech mode. oraimo’s focus and success on this major point of concern for many users reaffirms the brands innovative, problem-solving and leadership ethos. oraimo provides its users with high level tech gadgets at a fraction of the cost of other competing products without compromising on quality.

You can purchase the oraimo FreePods 3 from the oraimo official website https
://ng.oraimo.com/ and Jumia.

Susan Nwaobiala

October 21, 2021

Announcements

gadgets, Oraimo, Sponsored Post
oraimo FreePods 3 Feature LeakFor a while now, oraimo has been cooking something awesome for her consumers, and it’s finally here. I guess it’s safe to say oraimo is like a fine wine that keeps getting better with time. When it comes to delivering a product that is not only affordable but also comes with quality that is packed with features that will give competitors a run for their money. oraimo is your best bet.

So many tech enthusiasts have been raving about how awesome the new oraimo freepods 3 is and the speculations just make me what to have a feel of the product.From what we have heard, it is evident that oraimo went back to the drawing boards to draft out a significant upgrade on the already excellent freepods 2 by giving us an even better voice quality.

Felloww oraimo lovers, it is safe to say we have been expecting an upgrade on the voice quality for a while now and if the speculation is true regarding this then I am here to tell you that the oraimo freepods 3 is a must-buy in my book.

“The oraimo freepods 3 gleefully rocks a Like face to face conversation with a clear as crystal voice to the caller on the other end,” one of our sources told us about the improvement made to the voice quality of the new freepods. This means that even in the noisiest environment, you can gossip away and be sure that the caller on the other end wouldn’t miss out on any detail.

Excited right? So am i. It doesn’t stop there. The sound quality is also expected to be better than its predecessor. Music and movie lovers are in for a treat in this regard with our sources telling us that consumers should be excited about what oraimo has got in store in this area. All I know is, with the rave behind the supreme sound quality expected on the freepods 3, Ed Sheeran’s lover like myself can now listen to his sonorous voice and still not miss out on the subtle piano and guitar in the background. The sound experience on the freepods 3 is expected to be impeccable as it is made to make the music just as the artist intended. Numerous speculations that keep talking about new features on the oraimo freepods 3 have engulfed the tech space and I cannot wait to get my hands on it when it finally launches.One more bit of good news is that you get to experience all this for yourself when the product launches on the 28th of September, 2021 at exactly 7 am, you are also entitled to a discount when you make an order.

All you have to do is register on the oraimo page and place your order to be eligible for the discount. oraimo has cooked something wonderful for us and I for one is anticipating it.

Susan Nwaobiala

September 25, 2021

Announcements

gadgets, Sponsored Post
This Infinix INBook X1Pro from Infinix is the perfect blend of productivity and portability that satisfies consumers’ major pain points. It is simply a perfect blend of innovation, intelligence, and craftsmanship.

If you’ve always wanted the best tech specs and affordability at the same time, you can get the INBook X1Pro without thinking twice. Infinix is offering you a premium experience at an affordable price and a chance to win this laptop for free.

It is lightweight and holds a lot of power with an all-aluminum alloy body, screen brightness, high color gamut, 65W fast charge, a long standby, and an ultra-thin and ultra-light body. This laptop guarantees high performance, long battery life, fast charge for enhanced productivity, a better entertainment experience, and even more.

How to Win

If you want to get the INbook experience, you can be a part of the 6 people getting the device for free. All you have to do is participate and you can get this laptop by following these simple steps;

1. Upload a picture of Timini, DJ Kaywise, Priscilla Ojo, Nancy, or any other celebrity sharing their experience with the INbook

2. Write a 50 – 300-word story about how laptops or technology has changed your life or helped your career, and stand a chance to get the INBook experience

3. Upload using the Hashtag #InbookX1Pro, tag @Infinixnigeria, and the celebrity whose picture you’ve uploaded.

The story would be reviewed by the Judges on three criteria, Originality, Creativity, and Engagement.Three winners would get – i7laptop and another three would get – i3 laptop.

Aside from this, there’s another catch. The first 50 people to purchase an Infinix INBookX1Pro will be rewarded! Just upload your details on https://www.infinixmobility.com/laptops/inbook to win a BoomBox and a laptop kit There will also be special gifts for people that purchase the laptop in the first week but don’t fall among the first 50 people. Needless to say, time is ticking, so go get your Infinix INBookX1Pro now.

Susan Nwaobiala

July 2, 2021

Announcements

gadgets, Infinix, tech
If you’ve ever bought any device in Nigeria then you must have come across one or more of these Nigerian laws of technology.

1) There’s nothing as good as follow come accessories.

Protect it with your life. Charger, ear phones, etc.

2) Most problems can be traced to the Motherboard.

At least according to the “Engineer.”

3) Or charging port.

Every single time.

4) Even if they write water-resistant on the phone, you don’t test it.

Let’s not be unfortunate pls.

5) When your phone shows battery fully charged, you keep charging.

There’s nothing like fully charged especially when you are leaving your house.

6) If your phone is not charging, blow air into the charging port.

Or bend the wire.

7) If your phone spoils, dismantle it and spread under the sun.

Nothing Nigerian sun can’t fix.

8) Once you start to repair your phone, the end is near.

Problem, another problem.

9) If your phone falls, the more shocked you are, the lesser the damage.

Bonus points if you scream (insert religious statement or curse word here).

10) “Engineers” and we need to flash phone whenever there’s an issue.

Be like curse.

11) Power bank is life.

It’s a must own for every device you own.

Hassan Yahaya

July 6, 2020

Inside Life

commandments, gadgets, Unofficial
Most of us have these problems with our gadgets, especially the phones! Oh Lord!
1. When your phone spoils and you just can’t imagine what to do.

Should I just buy a new one?
2. When you try to call in your warranty but the manufacturers say no because it’s your fault.

HAY GOD!
3. Then they tell you that the price to fix it is the cost of a brand new Tecno smartphone.

Bye!
4. When you decide that the best people to fix it are the Ibo boys at computer village.

Oh god!
5. When you enter computer village and everyone is trying to grab you.

Wow, thanks guys!
6. When they tell you “oya let’s go to our shop” and their shop is a 30 minute walk away.

Why did I follow this one?
7. When you tell them to fix your charger and they completely format your device.

Kill me please!
8. When you’re fighting the urge not to look away from your phone repairer.

Before you check your phone, and all of a sudden it’s a Chinese iPhone.
9. When you go to fix one problem but your gadget leaves with three other problems.

This isn’t life.
10. When they tell you that the solution to your gadget’s problem is not in Nigeria yet.

Wait, what?!
11. When you try to buy an accessory but you miss the subtle spelling error, so you buy the fake.

Then your earpiece has a full apple instead of a bitten one.
12. When you finally fix your phone and the cost is almost as high as what you’d have paid at the original manufacturer’s repair shop.

LMAO!
13. When you go back a week later because the problem has returned but the shop is no longer there.

Kai!

Odunayo

February 15, 2016

Oldies

Fix, gadgets, Nigeria
1. When they ask what a button does, and it’s written right there.

My god!
2. When you have to constantly remind yourself that there are no stupid questions.

The lord is just testing me.
3. When you somehow have to convince them to learn to use it, like they’re doing you a favour.

Mommy, just learn now!
4. When they refuse to understand why you wouldn’t want to be friends on social media.

Unfriend. Unfollow. Mute. Block. Delete.
5. When they’re convinced that internet explorer is a browser.

Even internet explorer doesn’t think that.
6. When you try to explain something over the phone and they’re just not getting it.

HAY GOD!
7. And when you do help in person, it’s painstakingly slow.

Time is definitely standing still.
8. And then, if you succeed in teaching them, they think they know more about it than you.

This life!
9. When they blame you once something goes wrong with their phone or computer.

Me?
10. When you finally teach them to use Whatsapp and BBM and the first thing they do is create a family group.

Why do bad things happen to good people?!

Odunayo

December 17, 2015

Oldies

gadgets, Nigerian parents, Parents

Fresh material for our parents’ WhatsApp BCs

And the Nigerian police

People will start making TikToks with it

Baddies will turn it into a fashion statement

Users will start adorning it with chains and padlocks

The Nigerian version will hit the streets

It’ll turn to owambe souvenir

People will eventually abandon it at home

You suddenly realise your phone is missing

Doubt sets in

You start to have flashbacks

You start searching for the thief

You decide to confront the person

You realize that words alone cannot settle this issue

You get beaten really bad

You realise it’s not only your phone that was stolen

MONDAY:

TUESDAY:

WEDNESDAY:

THURSDAY:

Everyone’s raving about the new noise cancellation feature

Like face-to-face conversation

How to Win

1) There’s nothing as good as follow come accessories.

2) Most problems can be traced to the Motherboard.

3) Or charging port.

4) Even if they write water-resistant on the phone, you don’t test it.

5) When your phone shows battery fully charged, you keep charging.

6) If your phone is not charging, blow air into the charging port.

7) If your phone spoils, dismantle it and spread under the sun.

8) Once you start to repair your phone, the end is near.

9) If your phone falls, the more shocked you are, the lesser the damage.

10) “Engineers” and we need to flash phone whenever there’s an issue.

11) Power bank is life.

1. When your phone spoils and you just can’t imagine what to do.

2. When you try to call in your warranty but the manufacturers say no because it’s your fault.

3. Then they tell you that the price to fix it is the cost of a brand new Tecno smartphone.

4. When you decide that the best people to fix it are the Ibo boys at computer village.

5. When you enter computer village and everyone is trying to grab you.

6. When they tell you “oya let’s go to our shop” and their shop is a 30 minute walk away.

7. When you tell them to fix your charger and they completely format your device.

8. When you’re fighting the urge not to look away from your phone repairer.

9. When you go to fix one problem but your gadget leaves with three other problems.

10. When they tell you that the solution to your gadget’s problem is not in Nigeria yet.

11. When you try to buy an accessory but you miss the subtle spelling error, so you buy the fake.

12. When you finally fix your phone and the cost is almost as high as what you’d have paid at the original manufacturer’s repair shop.

13. When you go back a week later because the problem has returned but the shop is no longer there.

1. When they ask what a button does, and it’s written right there.

2. When you have to constantly remind yourself that there are no stupid questions.

3. When you somehow have to convince them to learn to use it, like they’re doing you a favour.

4. When they refuse to understand why you wouldn’t want to be friends on social media.

5. When they’re convinced that internet explorer is a browser.

6. When you try to explain something over the phone and they’re just not getting it.

7. And when you do help in person, it’s painstakingly slow.

8. And then, if you succeed in teaching them, they think they know more about it than you.

9. When they blame you once something goes wrong with their phone or computer.

10. When you finally teach them to use Whatsapp and BBM and the first thing they do is create a family group.