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fertility | Zikoko!
  • Talk True: Is Period Syncing a Real Thing?

    Talk True is a Zikoko limited series for medical myth-busting. With each episode, we’ll talk to medical professionals about commonly misunderstood health issues to get the actual facts.


    Eight out of ten babes probably share this experience: They were living with other ladies for a while, and suddenly, they realised their menstrual periods had synced.

    It’s such a widespread notion that one hardly knows when or how it started; we’ve just come to accept it. But is it based on scientific fact or tales-under-the-moonlight material? An internal medicine practitioner, Mary says it’s more of the latter.

    What’s period syncing?

    “We weren’t taught period syncing in medical school, and that’s largely because it’s not backed by extensive research,” Mary says.

    Period syncing describes a popular belief that women who didn’t have synchronised periods before will begin to when they stay in close proximity long enough. It’s also known as Menstrual Synchrony or the McClintock effect.

    Dr Martha McClintock was the OG babe who started it all. In 1971, she studied a group of 135 women living in a college dorm and concluded that the female pheromones communicate with each other due to physical closeness, triggering period syncing. 

    Something about the moon?

    Period syncing isn’t limited to close proximity with other women. Other reports claim menstrual cycles also sync with lunar cycles, meaning that periods can be tracked with the different moon phases.

    According to this study, if menstruation starts during the full moon phase, it’d mean the woman is most fertile during the new moon — a claim Mary insists has no scientific basis.

    “It’s a thing in some cultures — definitely not common in Nigeria, though — but no, you can’t sync with the moon.”


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    It all comes down to mathematics and coincidence

    Mary explained that, while there’s little scientific evidence to prove syncing is due to hormones or lunar cycles, there’s actually a valid mathematical explanation.

    “Women have different menstrual cycles, and over time, they’ll overlap. For instance, I have a 28-day cycle. This means I won’t start my period on the same day of each month because my cycle doesn’t span a complete month. I can start on the 15th of month one and start on the 18th of the following month. I may even see my period twice in the same month. This probability is higher in those with 26-day cycles, and if such a person is your roommate, your periods will overlap at a point. 

    It’s different from someone with a complete 30-day cycle who always menstruates on a particular date. Even then, if you live with someone with a different cycle length, overlapping is a possibility.”

    It also explains the moon thing. When the early people — read as “our ancestors” — still relied on lunar calendars, it was just natural to track the menstrual cycle with the lunar cycle as both timelines share an approximate average of 28 days. It wasn’t universal, as there would’ve been women with different cycle lengths, but it kinda worked. Again, mathematics.

    What do current findings say?

    Quite a number of recent studies have debunked the McClintock effect.

    “A 2006 study by Human Nature and another one by Oxford University provided data which demonstrated how unlikely it is for women to disrupt each other’s menstrual cycles just by being in close proximity to one another.”

    What can actually affect your period?

    Since science has agreed that your female bestie doesn’t pose a threat to your menstrual cycle, here are some of the factors Mary confirms can actually affect your period.

    “Stress and medication due to certain chronic illnesses can either delay your period or bring it on early. Birth control pills also alter the levels of certain hormones in your body — specifically progesterone and estrogen — and these control when, or if, you see your period.”

    The takeaway

    Menstrual cycles don’t converge; they diverge — increase indefinitely — during the course of life. If you do feel a connection with the other women in your life, it’s probably a coincidence. 

    However, if you’ve “synced” with the women you live with before and then experienced an “out of sync” period, it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with your cycle.


    NEXT READ: Talk True: Are Toilet Infections Actually a Thing?


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  • “It’s a Personal Hell” — 7 Nigerian Women on Trying and Failing to Conceive

    A friend of mine shared a pregnancy scare story and the thanksgiving that came with finally getting her period. Babies in this economy? Heck no.

    But then, the conversation shifted to the irony of it all. Some women want to have babies, economy be damned, but it’s just not happening. I spoke to seven ladies, and they told me about not being able to conceive in a society that attaches a woman’s value to marriage and kids.

    “It’s a personal hell”

    — Cara*, 28

    I’ve been married for two and a half years without a child. I had pregnancy scares with my boyfriend (now husband) before we got married, but now that I actually need it, nothing.

    My husband is the only child of his mother, and though she hasn’t said anything, I can interpret the worried looks she gives me any time we visit. We’ve done medical tests, and the results say we’re fine. My husband keeps telling me to ignore it, but isn’t he a man? He can just wake up tomorrow and decide to mess around with someone outside to “test” his fertility. 

    Then there are the womb watchers whose stares linger when I’m slightly bloated from my period or overeating. I can’t let my worries show because people would pounce on it and start giving me stupid advice. It’s a personal hell. I’m tired, please. 

    “I feel very alone”

    — Ijeoma*, 26

    I’ve been trying to conceive since my wedding night three years ago, but so far, it hasn’t worked.

    It’s even more painful because I married young, and everyone thought I’d just start popping out babies. Even now, most people think we just aren’t ready for kids. The few people I told about our struggles made me regret saying anything. Why would you tell someone, “But you still have time now”? I feel very alone because most people my age can’t relate to my struggles. People are just starting to be more vocal about Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), but even that is still shrouded in secrecy and fear of judgement. I desperately want to form an online community, but I’m scared of my friends and family members finding out about this side of me.

    “It feels like a test, and I’m failing”

    — Fadeke*, 33

    I’ve been trying to conceive for four years, and it’s starting to feel like I’m failing at a test. The pressure from our parents isn’t helping. Every time they call, they end with prayers for a baby. My partner and I have tried almost everything from drug supplements, to an IUI and even “womb massages” (traditional women basically pound your lower stomach like yam, all in the name of rearranging your womb). I couldn’t walk for three days after getting the massage, and my period came five days earlier than expected. At this point, I’m just looking at God. If we raise money for an IVF, we’ll try that. If not, I give up.


    RELATED: What She Said: I Am No Longer Pursuing Conception


    “Nigeria isn’t helping matters”

    — Christine*, 39

    I have a blocked fallopian tube, and my husband has low sperm motility. In other words, we have almost zero chance of conceiving naturally.

    I’m fine with it now, but I was a mess when we first got the diagnosis ten years ago. When I saw a pregnant woman on the street, I’d go back home to cry. I once cried when our dog got pregnant and gave birth to five puppies. It was like; even dogs can get pregnant.

    I’m better at managing my emotions now, and we’ve been trying to adopt, but Nigeria isn’t helping matters. We’re hoping to adopt a baby, but it’s next to impossible here because orphanages tend to have older children. We’re still trying, though.

    “I’m focusing on the positives”

    — Dana*, 31

    My partner and I have been trying to conceive for two years with no luck. We decided not to get medical intervention because we didn’t want to focus on negative reports. We just keep our faith strong and trust that God will do it at the right time. At least, I can sleep and wake up anytime I like, cook when I want and just spend time with my partner without interruptions. I’m focusing on the positives. Babies will come when God says so.

    “I’m just tired”

    — Oretha*, 37

    I’ve been married for six years, and I’ve not gotten pregnant once. I’m in my 30s, so I know that’s already a risk factor even though my doctor says I’m medically clear.

    The problem is my husband. He refuses to get tested because he has a son from his baby mama. According to him, if anything was wrong with him, he wouldn’t have his son.

    It’s painful because the societal pressure is on me. People would message with unsolicited advice and invites to prayer sessions. Nobody stops him on the street to say, “I’m praying for you”. It’s just me. I’m honestly considering leaving this marriage.

    “It’s a lot”

    — Ada*, 29

    It’s my fifth year of trying, and frankly, it’s a lot. There are days when you’re happy and filled with hope. Other days, you just cry and cry. My husband tries his best to console me, but he doesn’t fully understand my deep yearning. Without my online infertility support group, I don’t know where I’d be. I tell ladies in similar situations to always look for a community. You can’t walk this road alone.


    *Names have been changed for the sake of anonymity.


    NEXT READ: What She Said: I Didn’t Know I Was Almost Six Months Pregnant