1. Whenever you go to Diamond bank and the queue looks like:

Hian! Only one bank?

2. When you see year one students talking about graduating with first class.

You will soon learn.

3. When you meet someone and they tell you their department is Met/Mat.

You don enter am.

4. When you pass Hostel C at night and see people loving up.

Don’t go and read your book.

5. When you go to love garden expecting to find love, but you see people praying.

Where did all the love go?

6. Hostel girls, after pumping ‘man power’ on a steady:

Unofficial FUTO gym.

7. When you bring out your phone around Umuchima after 7pm.

See ehn, just run.

8. You, after eating at Madam Quantity or Delight Buka:

Life savers.

9. FUTO boys, waiting to rock one girl at a party:

Just waiting to enter set.

10. When you hear you have to write a paper in hall of mercy.

That hall never showed anyone mercy.

11. Eziobodo road, whenever small rain fell:

The absolute worst.

12. How the Man O’ War saw themselves:

They can use you to shine.

13. You, after buying 3 units of HOD’s popcorn:

Groundnut was elective.

14. How you feel after chowing Eismann Fries’ bread:

That bread was life.

15. Your best moment in FUTO:

FINALLY!!!