Email | Zikoko!

Everyone wants to sound agreeable, even when it’s not how they really feel. Even your most-used email sign-offs aren’t safe from the eye service drama.

But what do they say about you? Let’s get into it.

Yours sincerely

Grandma, is that you? Anyone who still ends emails with this is probably stuck in the middle ages AND is part of the WhatsApp group of people who believe any time rain falls on a sunny day, a lion is giving birth.

Best regards

You’re just working because you have a thing against living under the bridge. You’re also tired of capitalism, but you’ve gotten to the age when you’ve learnt to accept it as the necessary evil it is.

Regards

You think every meeting should’ve been an email, but when they become emails, you don’t reply unless you absolutely have to. I respect it.

Cheers

You lowkey don’t like your coworkers or even the idea of work, but you have to look alive for the culture. You also tend to exhibit Nigerian-parent “put it on my head” behaviour.

Thanks in advance

You’ve spent far too much time applying for jobs. It’s giving “I look forward to hearing from you”, but hey, your Nigerian mother would love that you’re so respectful at work.

Enjoy the rest of your day

You’re either a really nice person who genuinely cares about people, or you work in customer service, and you honestly don’t give a damn about anybody.

Best

You have zero patience. Your mantra is probably, “Try me and see”. Chances are you’re also a firstborn.

Please, accept the assurance of my highest regards

Are you contesting for a political post, or what’s happening here? I’ve only ever seen this sign-off in emails from government ministries. If you use it, I’m tempted to say you’re a corrupt detty liar.

[Your name]

It’s giving “main character”. Why waste time using sign-offs when they only need to know the name behind the greatness they just read?

No sign-off at all

Pride, dear. That’s exactly what it is.

NEXT READ: These 10 Things Should Be Added to the Coworker Code

Tife Oni

March 17, 2023

Inside Life

coworkers, Email, Funny, hustle, workplace
Sign-offs are the core of every work email. There’s no reason why it should be boring. Which one is “Best regards” or “Yours sincerely”? Where’s the spice in that?

Read this to make your work experience more interesting.

https://memes.zikoko.com/

1. Respectfully, I am in tears

You can use this when your team lead has emailed you like ten times in one day. You too are someone’s child, abeg.

2. I said what I said

This one is for when your coworker forwards an email back to you and asks if it’s for them. You don’t even need to write anything in the body of the email, just sign-off with this.

3. Yours vaccinatedly

Honestly, it’s a thing of pride that you’ve gotten the vaccine and why shouldn’t everyone know? You’re doing your part as a good citizen to encourage people to get the vaccine.

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4. Nothing do you

https://memes.zikoko.com/

This one should always be used as an insult. There are no two ways tbh, especially when someone sends you a mail in the middle of the night. Something must be doing them.

5. You know the vibe

This sign-off should be used on Fridays only because it means don’t text me again, my weekend has started.

6. E go be

If you use this, you are telling them that if they reply to that email they’re on their own because they will be aired.

7. Reply if you’re bad

This is a nicer way of saying e go be. They’ll waste so much time wondering if they’re bad and before they know, it’s close of business.

8. To Jesus be my glory

https://memes.zikoko.com/

This is clearly a threat because why are you bringing spiritual forces into human matters? Use at your discretion.

9. Gbogbo wa la ma je breakfast

This is for when you get fired for signing off with all these. The least you can do is end it with a bang. As it has come for you in the morning, it will come for them in the evening.

Looking to spice up your Instagram feed? Follow Zikoko Memes 😏

Malakai Bassey

April 7, 2021

Inside Life

coworkers, Email, Inside life, signoffs, workplace
Coronavirus is changing a lot of things. From work to travel to worship. I was wondering if some of this change could trickle down to email culture. Especially seeing as social distancing is the new rule.

Email culture ~~can be~~ is very passive-aggressive. With its innuendos and doublespeak galore. I was inspired by Ufuoma to see if we could try some of these email sign-offs since it now seems somehow to end an email with “warm” regards.

1) I like the sound of this.

Let everyone bear their father’s name.

2) Social distancing 101.

As far away as possible.

3) Please, let’s be guided.

Can’t be too careful on these streets.

4) Thoughtful.

Take care and be safe!

5) This one triggered me.

Because where are you rushing to?

6) More like sent from my couch.

Sent from boxers for remote work.

7) Wake me up when it’s all over.

But if the world was ending, you’d come over, right?

8) I agree.

2020 can you like…chill?

How much do you know about Coronavirus and precautions to take? Take this quiz to find out and also, share it with your friends and family!

Hassan Yahaya

March 20, 2020

Hustle

Corona, coronavirus, Email, Job, work
If you’ve ever had a boss or been employed, even for a day, chances are that you have had one too many meetings in your short lifetime. Many of them, irrelevant and unnecessarily long. The sound of the word “meeting” probably irritates you because they’re just gatherings where people sit and say a lot of things, then leave without really achieving anything. Sometimes, you don’t even know the reason for the meeting, you just know that you had to be there because someone said so.

Here’s a list of reasons people call for meetings.

To Schedule A Meeting

Believe it or not, some people call for meetings just so that they can discuss what will be discussed in the next meeting. It seems crazy. But it happens.

When your boss calls for a meeting on Friday evening to schedule a meeting for Monday morning

To Review A Meeting

I’ve seen too many employers do this one. You should try it if you’re an employer: when you’re bored and it feels like your employees are watching Netflix with the office WiFi, send a mail to everyone to meet in the conference room in 20 minutes to review what was discussed in the previous meeting even though it has no relevance

To Introduce An Employee

Tell everyone to stop what they’re doing and come for a meeting ASAP because they need to meet the new employee. It’s great for his character.

To Say A Sentence

My friend had to drive 2 hours to an “urgent” meeting just for the guy to tell her “Yes I just wanted to tell you that my boss has approved the project to go underway. Have a nice day.” True Story.

ODavid

September 5, 2019

Inside Life

Email, Meeting, New Employee, Office, Teamwork