dark skinned | Zikoko!

An Elsa Majimbo Guide to Glowing for Dark-Skinned People

Have you seen Elsa Majimbo’s glow lately? The melanin is popping, her Kenyan meets American accent has fans in a chokehold, and our girl be out here narrating her life like a telenovela, all while slathering on shea butter like it’s going out of style. She’s showing us how to give our skin some much-needed TLC.

@elsa.majimbo
♬ original sound – Elsa Majimbo

If you’re still conflicted about how to give your melanin skin the glow it deserves, you should take notes.

Show some skin

Even though you’re doing it for you, people of the world have to witness the result of all the hard work you put into looking this good. Spaghetti tops, off-shoulder cuts, crop tops and mini skirts should be your go-to fits.

Use shea butter

Our forefathers were on to something when they coined the iconic “Black and Shine” term. But Elsa knows the shine doesn’t happen by accident. It happens by deliberately slathering shea butter everywhere. Your neck, shoulders, arms, belly, armpit, EVERYWHERE.

When people see your picture and drop comments like, “Even if you’re plantain”, you know you’ve done a good job.

And top with Vaseline for extra shine

You don’t stop at shea butter. You have to go in with a generous scoop of petroleum jelly everywhere, to make up for spots you might’ve missed when you applied shea butter.

Don’t forget the body oil

In case you’re not paying attention, “too much shine” isn’t a concept in Elsa’s books. It’s the only reason why body oil is a must in a lineup that already has shea butter and petroleum jelly.

Throw in some glossy lip finish

You’ll never catch Elsa with a no-shine, non-glossy lip finish. So, leave that matte. You don’t want to have em lips looking ashy while rocking the shiny body of a black goddess.

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The body mists

You don’t want to be the black and shine that walks into a room smelling like day-old akara oil. Instead, you want compliments that go from “You’re glowing” to “You smell so nice”. That right there is the power of layering. So, on top of all that butter and oil, throw in a generous razzle dazzle of body mist.

And some perfume too

Surely, you know Elsa doesn’t leave her business in only one capable hand. If the duo of shea butter and vaseline for shine weren’t enough, why should body mists for scent be? Exactly. Layer that shit up with some perfume that leaves you smelling like money itself.

If you enjoyed reading this, you’ll find this article relatable: 10 Annoying Things Dark Skinned People Will Relate To

Adeyinka Odutuyo

January 31, 2024

Inside Life

dark skinned, Nigerians, skincare
10 Annoying Things Dark Skinned People Will Relate To

1. Some idiots will assume you don’t love your skin the way it is and that deep down you really wish you were light skinned.

You don’t even know me.
2. So they will suggest that you bleach your skin.

“Listen, you probably mean well but I don’t want to end up looking like a three day old corpse. So no, thanks.”
3. They will ignore everything you’re saying and start suggesting bleaching creams you can use.

“Have you tried FOREVER CLEAR? WHITENING LOTION nko? What of GOAT MILK WHITENER?”
4. When this happens, shout sense into their head.

“DID YOU NOT JUST HEAR ME?! I DON’T WANT TO LOOK LIKE BOBRISKY!!! GTFO!”
5. Then there are those terrible humans that will say that they don’t date dark skin people.

This makes no sense because like half of the people that say this are dark skinned themselves. All of them are mad.
6. If you’re very dark, one idiot will try to nickname you “Nightcrawler” or worse, “Nightwalker”.

If someone calls you “Nightwalker”, you have every right to punch him/her in the throat. They deserve it.
7. If you are very dark, a lot of people will automatically assume that you’re from the North.

Believe me when I tell you that Nigerian stereotypes are just plain stupid.
8. Someone will joke that if you have children with another dark skinned person, your kids will be “black like satan”.

“DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW OFFENSIVE THIS IS?!!”
9. This is you when you see a job vacancy and the employers specifically ask for only light skinned people.

ARE WE NOT HUMAN BEINGS??!! ARE YOU MAD??!!
10. Whenever harmattan comes, you absolutely have to rub Vaseline or else you’ll end up looking like this

You will look like a low budget Nollywood ghost.
Now that you know the struggles of dark skin people, read this next article that properly chronicles the struggles of light skinned Nigerians.

10 Annoying Things Light Skinned People Can Relate To

Astor George

May 19, 2017

Oldies

annoying, dark skinned, Funny, Nigerian

An Elsa Majimbo Guide to Glowing for Dark-Skinned People

10 Annoying Things Dark Skinned People Will Relate To

1. Some idiots will assume you don’t love your skin the way it is and that deep down you really wish you were light skinned.

2. So they will suggest that you bleach your skin.

3. They will ignore everything you’re saying and start suggesting bleaching creams you can use.

4. When this happens, shout sense into their head.

5. Then there are those terrible humans that will say that they don’t date dark skin people.

6. If you’re very dark, one idiot will try to nickname you “Nightcrawler” or worse, “Nightwalker”.

7. If you are very dark, a lot of people will automatically assume that you’re from the North.

8. Someone will joke that if you have children with another dark skinned person, your kids will be “black like satan”.

9. This is you when you see a job vacancy and the employers specifically ask for only light skinned people.

10. Whenever harmattan comes, you absolutely have to rub Vaseline or else you’ll end up looking like this

Now that you know the struggles of dark skin people, read this next article that properly chronicles the struggles of light skinned Nigerians.