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Croatia | Zikoko!
  • We can all say that Croatia played the game of their lives against France. But the thing about football is this;

    If you like play with your heart and soul, if the ball doesn’t enter the post, there’s no point.

    So, Croatia might have played a great game, but France scored more goals. Now, what I have to say might sound a bit wild.

    But I want to point out the fact that France didn’t really win the World Cup.

    When half of your team consists of Africans, who does the cup really go to? Be honest o.

    Africa? Yes! Africa. All of us.

    I could decide to give an analysis of every single African player on that team.

    But we are going to sleep here. I promise you.

    The most important thing you need to know is that from Mbappe to Pogba to Kante and Lemar, Mendy, Matuidi, Rami, Umtiti, Mendy, N’zozi, and many others are all Africans.

    Infact, Lemar is half Nigerian. I’m so emotional right now

    So we can also say that somehow, Nigeria won this Cup too.

    Oh, I’m so proud to be Nigerian.

    Infact I’m sure if we dig deep, we would find out that Pelé has African genes somewhere somehow.

    Just think about this, what is Pele in Yoruba? I won’t say more than that.

    Let me tell you the bitter truth, it’s okay to disagree. But just know that almost every legend in the history of legends comes from some part of Africa.

    I can start mentioning names, but I don’t want us to divert.

    Let’s place our focus on what is important for today. Africa borrowed France the World Cup.

    Not only are we skilled, we are also generous. Wow. A whole continent.

    On a serious note, whether we like it or not, Qatar 2022, Nigeria is bringing that cup home. I’m saying it with my chest.

    Okay maybe just half of my chest.

    I think before we end this, it’s important that we congratulate France properly.

    So dear France, congratulations.  You have done well.

    But if you actually think Africa deserves all the accolades raise your hand.

    Now let us know your reason below.
  • We know we already screwed up against Croatia.

    But did we die?

    Anyway, for this match, the players have assured us they will die on the line.

    Whether home, away, out, anything, we will die on that line

    But we have some important warnings for them.

    Please read carefully

    Dear Eagles, please we don’t want to see you dance any shaku shaku today.

    Everyday shaku shaku, no goal

    I also have to add that we know you boys are buff, but the fashion show is enough please.

    Not everyday runway

    See for this game, we need you guys to actually stand. Stop falling.

    At least you have a better chance at scoring if you’re on your feet and not on the floor

    If goal is catching you, Great Super Eagles, please go to their post. You know, that’s actually where you can score a goal.

    Makes sense right?

    You also need to remember that as you’re praying, they’re also praying

    But na who play pass dey win match

    Also, before you settle down to watch this match, please make sure there’s fuel in your generator.

    Because anything could go wrong, not Nepa o.

    If you don’t have fuel in your generator , you can just enter a viewing center.

    There’d be cold Star there as well, so win win

    And if you’re watching from home, be very sure to secure a few cans of Star.

    You know, just to relax your nerves

    But whatever you do, do not be alone while watching this match.

    It is too risky, watch with your whole squad, all of them.

    If we win, then you can dance shake shake or anything else with your chest

    Yes! Super Eagles issa goal, we always believed in you boys

    And if we lose, just try to sleep it off.

    But please tell the Eagles to just stay in russia
  • Nigeria’s first match was yesterday and as you can expect Nigerians had a lot to say about it.

    When we heard that it was Croatia we were playing against.

    Who Croatia be sef?

    Then we noticed that it’s not even only us that’s watching the match.

    Good luck to the @NGSuperEagles today in the #WorldCup 🇳🇬🇳🇬🇳🇬

    — Diddy (@Diddy) June 16, 2018 What kind of unnecessary pressure is this now?

    When we realized that the only thing we had to offer this match is fine jersey…

    Nigerian kits vs Nigeria’s football ability. pic.twitter.com/sfjgz6DLmH

    — Danny WelBeast (@WelBeast) June 16, 2018

    … and shaku shaku.

    Croatia players warming up before the game like any serious team would do.

    Nigeria players: pic.twitter.com/wmJ8XyTS2m — M (@Mike_Nkansah) June 16, 2018

    Even Victor Moses could not take us to the promised land.

    Moses has fallen more times than wall of Jericho

    — Team Nigeria (@Iam_Abdulaxis) June 16, 2018

    Maybe it would have been better if we had played in the afternoon.

    Nigeria should have played in de afternoon, photosynthesis requires sunlight

    — Fan-ice (@fredlittle111) June 16, 2018

    After Croatia scored their second goal.

    The Nigeria we expected in the world cup VS the Nigeria that showed up 😂😂😂 #CRONGA #WorldCup pic.twitter.com/dWestLLJe3

    — JIGSAW (@Farnell_Mtey) June 16, 2018

    We started questioning the reason they even went to Russia.

    You people went for tourism. Thank God for journey mercies sha https://t.co/HIWSIBPUNh

    — efe can sing. (@EfeOraka) June 16, 2018

    But it’s not as if they didn’t try to warn us.

    This one that Nigeria players are already begging even before our first #WorldCup match. They better not underperform 🙏 pic.twitter.com/qx9eZNWTOd

    — Elvis Tunde ⚓ (@Tunnyking) June 16, 2018

    Some people even began to lose faith.

    Olamide & Phyno shot the video for “Road 2 Russia” yesterday. By the time they release it, the Super Eagles would already be on their way back from Russia.

    — Övie (@OvieO) June 16, 2018

    While some tried to help us renew it.

    Spain lost their first game at the 2010 World Cup. They went on to win that World Cup. Random #WorldCup tweet.

    — JJ. Omojuwa (@Omojuwa) June 16, 2018

    And when people tried to hate we reminded them that we are sha playing in the World Cup.

    How can you hate from outside the Cup? You can’t even get in! https://t.co/Lr7VA8uaHR

    — Tu abuelo (@CallMeAlhaji) June 16, 2018

    At the end of the day who is to blame?

    Who do you blame for our defeat?

    The players? (Specify) The coach? The opponents? The stadium? Our government? Ghana?#CRONGA#WorldCup#NaijaIssaGoal #ShareACokeWithOurSuperEagles — Mad E’Leine 🧙‍♀️🇳🇬 (@badgalmaddie_) June 16, 2018

    There might even be an upside to our loss.

    Apparently, the Super Eagles of Nigeria promised their President that “We will bring the World Cup home.”

    Let politicians also know how it feels to receive empty promises! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂#CRONGA — Francis Ndung’u (@Frank_ndungu_99) June 16, 2018

    We might not have won this match but you know we stay winning with our jersey.

    Just saying 😒 #CRONGA pic.twitter.com/tl6iaciu3z

    — Ire Aderinokun (@ireaderinokun) June 16, 2018
  • The World Cup starts tomorrow and while we are praying and hoping it’s not only fine aso-ebi we have to offer, we’ve come up with the perfect playlist to get you ready.

    Road 2 Russia (Dem go hear am) – Olamide & Phyno

    Our official 2018 world cup song

    Ballerz – Wande Coal

    We are stepping into Russia like

    Issa Goal – Naira Marley (feat. Olamide & Lil Kesh)

    For everytime we score a goal.

    Power of Naija – 2Face (feat. Cobhams & Omawunmi)

    Even though we are playing Portugal we still have hope

    Super Eagles Carry Go – Austin Milado

    We are readyyy!!!

    Osinachi – Humblesmith (feat. Davido)

    After we collect the cup from Germany.

    Super Eagles- Solidstar

    Croatia go clear road!

    Nigeria Go Survive – Veno Marioghae

    Even though we are playing Argentina, fear not.

    Penalty – Small Doctor

    We have a small prayer for Iceland – won ti gba penalty lo throwing

    Ole ole ole – The Fans

    For when we carry the cup

    Wavin Flag – K’Naan

    You can’t leave this classic off your World Cup playlist

    Oh Africa – Akon

    A win for Nigeria is a win for Africa.

    Waka waka – Shakira

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdojnHySFGk
    Did we leave any songs off the list?