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Corpers | Zikoko!
  • To Serve Our FatherLand…Or Not?

    Welcome to this Episode of “This is Nigeria”. Today, we would be placing our focus on our Minister of Finance.

    Mrs. Kemi Adeosun

    For those who aren’t Nigerians. Let me quickly explain something to you. There is a program called NYSC.

    National Youth Service Corps (NYSC)

    In Nigeria, after your university education, it is mandatory that you serve your country through this said program.

    Without doing this program, you won’t be qualified to get a job or run for political posts.

    Now, let me give you a brief history on our Minister of Finance just before we connect the dots to this story.

    She went to school in the Polytechnic of East London where she graduated at the age of 22.

    She didn’t move back to Nigeria immediately, so obviously she couldn’t serve her country immediately.

    Oh, I forgot to mention that as long as you graduate before 30 you are mandated to serve at any time.

    She got a job after graduating and changed jobs over 5 times from 1989 when she graduated up until 2000.

    Wow, she must be really hardworking.

    She moved back to Nigeria in 2002 when she got offered a job in a private company. Finally, she gets a chance to serve her fatherland.

    But no, she came back and didn’t partake in the program.

    Her career skyrocketed to the point where she became Nigeria’s Minister of Finance.

    Such goals!

    Nigerians have ears everywhere and know everything. I promise you. Because they were able to dig out the fact that Mrs. Adeosun never served Nigeria.

    But she is serving as the Minister of Finance? How?

    For some reason, she has a certificate. And a lot of people have come to the conclusion that its a fake one.

    At least until Mrs. Kemi can prove otherwise.

    Its very important to talk about it because the average Nigerian can’t get a job without having done NYSC.

    And you can even face jail time for not participating in this program. It’s that important.

    With all of this in mind, I just want you to know that there is a high possibility our Minister of Finance did not serve her fatherland.

    But no worries, once she speaks up about it. I’d let you know.
  • How Many Of These People Did You Meet In NYSC Camp?

    You’ll never be exposed to a crowd of people as diverse as those you’ll meet in NYSC camp. Although the living conditions are appalling these people almost make the whole experience worth it.

    There are the ones who just came back from the overseas and will start stressing everybody with ‘that’s not how we did thing in the States’ and accent.

    Even the ones who went to Cotonou will have British accent.

    There are the ones who were only interested in getting exeat so that they could go home.

    They didn’t come to suffer with you commoners.

    The ones who just came to drink their destinies away at mammy market.

    But on a serious note, they might have actually needed professional help.

    Then there were the ones who belonged to the school of hard knacks and only came to have as much sex as they could.

    It’s just three weeks, it’s that how the konji is doing you?

    The ITKs that were always volunteering for everything.

    They didn’t rest until they became platoon leader.

    The ‘do you know who my father is’ people?

    If you don’t geddifok out of here.

    The ones who were somehow so excited to be in camp.

    Have you seen the toilets? What’s making you happy?

    We can’t leave out all those promise and fail soldiers.

    The ones that’ll tell you don’t worry if you march well you’ll get posted to the capital and you ended up getting posted to a village without light.

    The ones who were only there for the food.

    All the food sellers at mammy market knew them.

    The ones you are pretty sure were old enough to have been in the first ever batch of NYSC.

    They might have even been your father’s age mate.

    The ones whose life mission was to never step foot on the parade ground.

    They did whatever it took and were always in the clinic.

    There was the friendly soldier everyone liked.

    They didn’t have any wahala.

    And the one who was only interested in making people miserable.

    But who offended you?

    The ones who came to camp to find love.

    And they found it o.

    The ones who secured their exeat with doctor’s report as soon as they stepped foot into the camp.

    Only you asthma, cancer, bronchitis and HIV. Take your wahala and go.

    So who did we leave out and which one were you?

  • 8 Real Things About NYSC Everyone Knows Too Well

    8 Real Things About NYSC Everyone Knows Too Well

    1. When you’re putting on Khaki and everybody starts shouting “KOPA”.

    2. One of the best things about NYSC.

    3. When you meet someone that doesn’t understand your language.

    https://twitter.com/TillyTillie/status/800820378377605120

    4. Even Ryan Reynolds is tired of the khaki life.

    5. When you hear about job recruitments in camp.

    https://twitter.com/UrbanCulture06/status/746778392679284736

    6. This one about the annoying CDS struggle.

    https://twitter.com/Keleccini/status/631377409447698432

    7. When it’s the end of the month and allowee has not entered your bank account.

    8. When your salary is 19k and you’re toasting people up and down.

    https://twitter.com/Kh0lz/status/662370690239176704
  • 14 Pictures Of Corpers That Are Too Happy To Be Done With NYSC

    14 Pictures Of Corpers That Are Too Happy To Be Done With NYSC

    1. This babe that sharply went to bake cake.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN8DgPD4HJ/?tagged=naijacorpers

    2. This guy’s transitioning is with immediate effect.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLOBN9pAVrc/?tagged=naijacorpers

    3. This girl can’t believe it’s finally over!

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLOGtwNAgmD/?tagged=naijacorpers

    4. From one president to another.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLOFHBIB2um/?tagged=naijacorpers

    5. Her eyebrows say it all.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLOIKnQA_-K/?tagged=naijacorpers

    6. Join us in clearing the road for them.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN4BPxBExl/?tagged=naijacorpers

    7. This lady’s joy is about to fly out of the picture.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN2uZ5A-Dd/?tagged=naijacorpers

    8. Say cheese!

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN4Foch6sc/?tagged=naijacorpers

    9. 3 Gbosa for her makeup game!

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN57YKBehR/?tagged=naijacorpers

    10. With love from Nasarawa State.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN_vo_jE0m/?tagged=naijacorpers

    11. You only ‘POP’ once.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN2q4hBg70/?tagged=naijacorpers

    12. One corper, two certificates.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLN1QSeBjAu/?tagged=naijacorpers

    13. Her joy is very full.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLOIQgdAmva/?tagged=naijacorpers

    14. A year of multiple blessings.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BLOUWOVhX2j/?tagged=naijacorpers
  • 17 Pictures That Describe How You Feel When You Get Your NYSC Posting Letter

    17 Pictures That Describe How You Feel When You Get Your NYSC Posting Letter

    1. So you decided to join the millions of graduates going to serve their country because you heard it was a fun experience.

    Let’s do this.

    2. Even though you didn’t know what you were going to do with your NYSC certificate at the end of the day.

    I don’t know jare.

    3. So you carried all your money and gave someone to help you get posted to Lagos or Ibadan.

    Because Lagos is lit!

    4. When NYSC posting comes out and you’re seeing Kano on your own letter.

    5. When your friend that didn’t pay gets posted to Lagos.

    God, why?

    6. How your friends that got posted to Lagos or Abuja look at you.

    Can you just get out?

    7. When you and bae get posted to different states.

    Hay! Relationship over!

    8. When someone tries to see the silver lining and tells you to manage it like that.

    Enemy of progress.

    9. How you search for people posted to the same state you were posted to.

    Where are you people oh?

    10. When you’re thinking of skipping NYSC and just going back home.

    I’m not doing again.

    11. When you start making plans to redeploy before even going to camp.

    Lagos by fire by force!

    12. When you start planning to make excuses or fake illnesses when you get to camp.

    My doctor said camp is bad for my health abeg.

    13. How you calculate the money you’ll spend on what you have to wear in camp.

    Hay God!

    14. You, when you hear stories of how horrible camp food is.

    God forbid bad thing!

    15. When you have to travel by air, another two hour bus drive then 50 minute bike ride to camp.

    Kuku ask me to travel 7 oceans and seas.

    16. How you shed tears on the journey to camp.

    I want my mummy.

    17. When you see people actually excited to go to camp.

    See these oversabi people.
  • 15 Corpers Who Are Insanely Happy To Be Done With NYSC

    15 Corpers Who Are Insanely Happy To Be Done With NYSC
    It’s only normal to be totally lit after completing NYSC service year. On April 14th, the batch A corp members officially completed their service year and passed out from the NYSC program. Here are 15 corpers who were too happy to be done with the Khaki and 19k allowance life.

    1. Squad!

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEMB8GkF0Md/?taken-by=kofoshee

    2. Jumping for joy!

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEMh6SSG1UO/?taken-by=big_black_fella

    3. How you dab when you no longer have to go for CDS.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEM3gdbN_xn/?taken-by=layeanka

    4. Looks like these guys are dancing Alanta.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEMMlc0hOwW/?taken-by=hola4all

    5. And this guy is so happy, he can’t close his mouth.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEL_U54Lc91/?taken-by=ojutony

    6. The victory pose.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BELzSPMK5td/?taken-by=syndeldimple

    7. “No more waiting for allowee”.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BELvRxBoD4b/?taken-by=francessy1

    8. The filter on this picture though.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEL1jHgpz1H/?taken-by=am_ebenezer

    9. When you have been planning to leave NYSC from the first day in camp.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEKKKXOE59n/?taken-by=officiallysly

    10. How you smile when you make really awesome friends during NYSC.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEL3n99GLgj/?taken-by=blackisurgirl

    11. These guys look too lit.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEL1OBQLJRP/?taken-by=herodaniels

    12. When you realise people will stop calling you “Corper Alhaja” after P.O.P.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEMrK45rpwg/?taken-by=naijacorpers

    13. These two that ended their journey with love.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEMu8rNLp1_/?taken-by=naijacorpers

    14. How you smile after all the stress NYSC gave you.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEMApEfpt0Z/?taken-by=nailitbykosy

    15. To God be the glory.

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEMGCd4kEOK/?taken-by=prisca_gold
  • 17 Pictures That Are Too Real For People Who Have Gone To NYSC Camp

    17 Pictures That Are Too Real For People Who Have Gone To NYSC Camp

    1. When you check your posting and it’s a place you’ve never heard of.

    What the hell, NYSC?!

    2. Then you tell your friends you’re not going…but you know you’re going.

    *cries in limited options*

    3. But when they post you to the state of your choice, without you working it.

    You be resuming camp like.

    4. Then people tell you that this will be the best experience of your life.

    You bloody liars!

    5. When you get to camp and it’s time to line up to register.

    Jesus, chill!

    6. And you have to fill a million forms before you get that room.

    Is it not just bed?

    7. When you have your first glimpse of the camp toilet.

    Hold me, Jesus!

    8. Then you realize it’s time to stock up on black nylons.

    This is what it has come to?

    9. When the only socket in the room is close to your bunk in camp so you don’t have to pay for charging.

    King of the zanga!

    10. When you taste official camp food for the first time.

    Oh what fresh hell is this?!

    11. Then you decide it’s mami market for the next three weeks.

    I cannot come and die.

    12. When the horn sounds for you to wake up. At 4am.

    I only slept like 4 hours ago!!!

    13. When someone tries to guilt you for not joining camp activities.

    Is it your concern?!

    14. When that first allowee arrives for you inside camp.

    Turn up!

    15. When you compare your before and after camp pictures.

    This is not me.

    16. When you realize that none of the advice you received before camp was relevant

    Awon advisers.

    17. When you realize that your uniform is the most unflattering garment you’d ever wear.

    https://t.co/tl9RwX8Mb3
    LMAO! This post is dedicated to the new batch of NYSC students. Corpers Wee!!