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bread | Zikoko!
  • The Best Bread Types Ever, Ranked by Nigerian Bread Lovers

    Whether you’re a fan of fluffy slices or crispy crusts, bread is a staple that rises to the occasion at every meal. Let’s break bread with Nigeria’s most beloved bread types, according to those who knead it the most. We asked around and this is what Nigerians think of the most popular bread types, from mid to upper crust.

    Raisin bread

    Raisin bread is rich and filling, but not everyone likes the too-sweet raisins.

    Wheat bread

    Source: 31 Daily

    Whole wheat bread might be a healthier alternative due to its higher fibre content, but let’s all just admit we find it less palatable compared to the sweeter and softer white bread.

    Brioche bread

    Is it bread or is it a pastry? Buttery and sweet, this one gives luxury or special-occasion bread because it simply always costs more — or maybe it just looks like it does? Either way, Nibbles Bread is about to introduce its version, and we guarantee it’ll be easy on the pocket.

    Tea buns

    Tea buns are enjoyed as a treat, especially with tea or coffee, but like brioche, they tend to be considered more of a snack than a staple.

    Sliced bread

    It’s convenient, good for sandwiches and widely available. But beyond being the perfect plain base for peanut butter and anything else you might like, it’s simply not that tasty on its own like the bread types above it.

    Sardine bread

    Great for when you want something savoury without having to spend on a spread or filling after buying your bread. The only reason why it’s not top of the list is because if it’s not fresh, it’s nasty.

    Coconut bread

    Source: Amy’s Delicious Mess

    It’s like biting into a sweet, nutty hug from the one Grandma who always brings you Gurundi and Shuku Shuku when she visits. Whether you enjoy this soft, moist bread plain or slathered in your favourite spread, it’s always a win. Throw in the health benefits of the coconut’s fibre and healthy fats, and what’s not to love? The only downside is how scarce it is.

    White loaf

    Source: Conde Nast Traveler

    Are you really surprised this is at the top of the ranking? Soft, fluffy and sweet, this is the go-to that defines what a “bread” should be. The OG, Agege bread, is low-yeast, and all other types and brands model themselves after it. But Nibbles family loaf is fluffy and sweet with a good price and longevity.

    Nicknamed the “bread of life”, Nibbles is one of the best bread brands in Nigeria today. People, especially those who like their bread fluffy, love it for its quality and variety of options. Today, it has family loaves and tea buns, with many new variants on the way. Available on a quick stop at any Kilimanjaro restaurant or any store or supermarket nationwide.

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    AND NOW: We Ranked Nigerian Bread Pairings From Worst To Best

  • Bread Goes With EVERYTHING and We Have Proof

    For a meal that’s a simple mixture of butter, flour, yeast and sugar, bread is the GOATed delicacy — yes, delicacy — man has ever made. 

    Nothing comes close to bread. You can make it on a stove or in an oven, it comes in different shapes and sizes, and you can pair it with literally anything and it’ll slap harder than a giveaway in this agbado era.

    Egusi

    Image sourced from foodrythms

    People might look at you sideways as you carefully spread your egusi on a thick slice of bread, but that shouldn’t concern you. They’ll never understand the greatness of such a pairing.

    Beans of any kind

    Image sourced from guardian.ng

    Do you know how bad you have to be to go into a family and marry all the members? The only person that comes close was Esau’s brother, Jacob, and we all know how much God loved him. Give it akara, ewa aganyin, palm oil beans, vegetable oil beans, and if you’re a real risk taker, gbegiri.

    Stew

    Image sourced from mydiasporakitchen

    If you can eat swallow and soup, then you can eat bread and stew. Make sure there’s an excess amount of protein in your stew, fold that bread, and eat to your heart’s content.

    Banana

    Image sourced from medicalnewstoday

    If you can eat banana bread, then you can slice a banana, place it between two slices of bread, and eat. 

    Pepsi

    Image sourced from nextcashandcarry

    Notice how we singled Pepsi out from its counterparts? Bread and all the other sodas are great, but bread and Pepsi? Your inner bricklayer will awaken, and you’ll feel like you can move mountains.

    Avocado

    Image sourced from jessicagavin

    Even though avocados look the way they do, we believe in the power of bread to make anything taste better than rice on a Sunday.

    Amala

    Image sourced from africanfoodnetwork

    We need you to have an open mind. People have attested to the greatness of this pairing. Plus, amala looks like chocolate.

    Indomie

    Image sourced from breakthespice

    If you plan on pairing cooked Indomie with bread then you have stand in front of the stove, take the indomie straight from the pot to the bread and into your mouth. It’ll slap so hard you’ll give testimonies for weeks to come.

    Ice cream

    Image sourced from swasthi’srecipes

    Think of it like bread and tea. Tear large chunks of bread into your bowl of ice cream, wait for it to steep, and then, scoop into your mouth.

    Egg

    Image sourced from bakerpedia

    One thing about bread, it’ll find other versatile foods and pair up with them. Bread and egg bangs, especially on a Saturday morning with a hot cup of tea to wash it down. And guess what. It can sleep with the mother too *wink.

    Anointing Olive oil

    We told you bread was for everyone — even the godly among us. Drizzle a light amount on your bread, let it soak in for a bit and eat. It’ll taste like a symphony in your mouth.

  • Butter and a Few Friends Fight for Bread’s Attention

    Everyone knows Bread is a bad bitch. She can be a bad bitch either alone or with company, so it’s no surprise when everyone tries to be Bread’s lover. She’s seen jam, beans, butter and even pap compete to be her primary companion. 

    Today, Bread invited all her admirers to debate on why she should spend the rest of her life with one of them. 

    Jam

    Bread, you are sweet, but with me, you’re sweeter. I know I was created with you in mind, my sweetness was made for yours and my creator made me because you exist. I can’t imagine a life without you and I don’t want to spend the rest of mine without the food that works best with me. Ignore what the rest of them say because when you’re with me, you’re your best self. 

    Butter

    I know I’m multifaceted, but I spread better when I’m with you. We work together, I in you and you in me. Issues may arise from me seeing other foods, but you’re the one I want to continue spreading on for the rest of my life. Yours, butter. 

    Beans

    Butter said it’s multifaceted, but I’m the Beyonce of meals. I have been with you in different forms and I have weathered many storms with you. I’ve been with you as cooked beans, as ewa agoyin, as moin-moin, as akara and as ekuru. The list goes on and on. You too, see how many good and tasty things we’ve achieved together. I’m with you and for you and I look forward to being yours for as long as I live. 

    Fried Egg

    I am risking my relationship with Yam to be here today. Bread, if you don’t accept me, I’ll have nowhere to run to. You know we shouldn’t be doing this 

    Mayonnaise 

    To be very honest, I don’t know what I am doing here. I heard people shouting Bread and I decided to follow them. All I know is that people keep trying to force a relationship on us and I have been encouraging them. Even I know that we don’t go well together. I am a colonizer and that’s what I’m about to do here. 

    Stew

    I’ve been by your side before the rest of them existed and I have to admit that I’m a little heartbroken that you’re letting the others get to your head. Contrary to what you think, I am not your bro, I know my siblings and they know me. I want to be your lover, Dip yourself into me and experience hot,  spicy, unspeakable joy. 

    Peanut Butter

    I saw jam coming here and decided to join them. All I want is for Bread, jam and I to be a throuple and I’ll be ok. 

    Indomie

    I think I’m lost. Where is the way out of here?

    *Oats and avocado are still at the door knocking, but Bread has heard enough*

  • QUIZ: Which Bread Combo Fits Your Personality?

    Have we ever lied to you? Exactly, so you can trust us.

    Take this quiz to find out which bread combo you are:

  • 4 Foods That Can Do Other Fulfilling Things

    Look, necessity is the mother of invention. Some foods can do other fulfilling things, alright. Let’s find out.

    1. Fried yam as a choker.

    Need to be choked? Fried yam dey for you. Don’t say you got the tip from us.

    2. Cucumber as a pleasure giver.

    Do I need to explain this? Duh. Go ahead, fill and please yourself.

    3. Eba as gum.

    What do you think people use to paste posters when they can’t find gum?

    4. Bread and rat posion.

    Bread and rat poison is the best thing after bread and butter.


    Read: 5 Ways a Buffet Can Go Wrong In Nigeria.

  • Quiz: Take This Quiz About Sex And We’ll Tell You Your Favourite Food

    Growing up, we all had favourite meals and it’s pretty much because our families or boarding schools had strict food timetables that almost never changed. Meals in those days (and even now) were pretty basic — fried rice/Jollof rice, all na still rice.

    We’re taking a gamble here — answer a few questions about your sex life and we’ll tell you what your best food was or is.