born | Zikoko!

15 Things That Are Too Accurate For Nigerians That Grew Up Abroad

1. When you misbehave and your parents threaten to send you to school in Nigeria.

Hay God!
2. You, watching your neighbours with their costumes and free candy on Halloween.

The devil holiday.
3. Your house during Halloween:

Na wa.
4. When your father calls you to tell your friend to come back and greet him well.

Is it me that one is telling “hi”?
5. When you ask your mother if you can go for a sleepover.

Better sit in your house.
6. Whenever your relatives from Nigeria call.

“Mummy, who is that?” “Just take the phone.”
7. You, whenever a teacher doesn’t pronounce your name correctly.

Better fix up.
8. When someone asks if you have an easier name.

You can pronounce Schwarzenegger, abi? You gon’ learn today.
9. Your class, when the teacher says something about Africa.

Face your front, abeg.
10. When someone asks you if you can speak African.

Don’t be unfortunate.
11. When you’re surrounded by restaurants but all you eat is:

There is always rice at home.
12. When your family goes for a “short visit” to Nigeria.

Hian! What is it?
13. When your mother knocks your head in public and people start staring.

See my life.
14. When you see your white friends talk back to their parents.

Jisos!
15. Your parents, whenever you brought home a Nigerian friend.

“Thank God!”

Daniel Orubo

May 4, 2016

Oldies

abroad, Africa, America, born, Grew Up, Immigrants, Nigerians, Parents, uk, USA
15 Pictures That Perfectly Describe Being The Youngest Child In A Nigerian Family

1. When your parents keep calling you the wrong name by accident.

Na wa. You born me by mistake?
2. When your parents constantly treat you better than your older ones.

WINNING!
3. When your parents send your siblings on an errand and they make you do it.

What is all this?
4. When everyone treats you like the baby of the house even when you become an adult.

You people should free me.
5. When everything in your wardrobe is basically second-hand.

When will I see new cloth, biko?
6. Whenever your siblings say “when you’ get older…”

Sorry oh Oldest Olamide.
7. When your siblings leave you at home because they think you’ll spoil their fun.

Na wa oh.
8. When your parents now force them to take you along and they ignore you throughout.

Are we even related like this?
9. When you report your siblings and your parents punish them.

Good for you.
10. When your teachers constantly compare you to your siblings.

Should I go and bring them back to your class for you?
11. When someone is bullying you and you tell your siblings.

My defenders,
12. When people start buying you things because they want to date one of your siblings.

You sabi.
13. Whenever people just assume you are spoiled.

You don’t have sense.
14. When all your siblings finally move out and your parents officially turn you into the help.

Is this my life now?
15. Whenever your parents left the house and left your older siblings in charge.

I’m dead.

Daniel Orubo

April 7, 2016

Oldies

Africa, born, last, Nigeria, Parents, Siblings, youngest