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Some anime characters do things that make me wonder if everything is okay upstairs. Here are questions I’d ask seven of them, if they were real people.
Zenitsu – Demon Slayer
Question: What’s the colour of your problem?
Because imagine passing out and sleep-fighting during every fight in real life? The time he’d take to wake up is when they’d beat his ass. If you know him, tell him to answer my question.
Question: When can we form an “I love women” club?
I started (and failed to finish) rewatching the old Pokemon series with Ash and the gang, and so far, Brock is my favourite character because I, too, think women are queens. This guy is the original simp. He’d ditch his crew for a babe if she blinked at him. I get it sha; women should be worshipped.
Denji – Chainsaw Man
Normal anime main characters are motivated to succeed so they can prove a point to their haters. Denji just wants to know the touch of a woman before he dies.
My question is simple: Sir, have you considered being motivated by money? Money cures depression. I know because I’m happy as hell when I’m not broke.
Yumeko Jabami – Kakegurui
Question: Aunty, please, is everything okay at home?
Do your parents know all you do is gamble your life away in the school they pay money for you to attend? From the first time I saw Yumeko on screen, I knew this unhinged gambler would give me a headache. I wish I was wrong.
Yuji Itadori – Jujutsu Kaisen
Question: Did you maybe consider not eating the fingers of a demon? At any point, sir, did you take a step back or even try to poop or vomit the thing? I know it was for the plot o, but I’m just asking.
What was going through Yuji’s mind when he swallowed Sukuna’s fingers? He probably wanted to save Megumi’s life, but he’d only met him seconds before then. God, abeg for real.
Dustiness Ford – KonoSuba
Lalatina Ford Dustiness, BKA Darkness, is a masochistic crusader. This is important information because ever since I saw her in Konosuba, I just wanted to ask: “Why?”
This babe commits many failed “heroic” acts, not for the plot but because of her masochistic tendencies. She also lets the main character, Kazuma, verbally insult her because it “feels good”.
Every freaking character in Komi can’t Communicate
Question: Why are all of you like this?
To every single character except Komi, I pose these questions: Who are your parents? How did they raise some of the most “down bad” characters I’ve seen all in one anime? Why don’t you all have self-respect? Was it a prerequisite to get into the school?
Nigerian anime fans got to have a safe space to gather and interact with each other at the 2022 Eko Anime Fest. And the cosplayers who attended had a lot to say about the joy of finding a like-minded community. Read about it here.
Emmanuel
This is my first anime event. I love the experience so far. It’s really nice, and I know it’s going to get better, so I’m here for it. The world is advancing technologically, so I hope they have a VR experience next time. But besides that, I love anime, I love HunterXHunter, my number one is One Piece, and I really like Cowboy Bepop. I’ve been watching anime since I was in junior school.
Mine
I’ve been watching anime since I was six, and my first was Naruto. Yes, I’m one of them; Naruto is my favourite anime. I’ve cosplayed about four times now. I cosplayed Carole from Carole & Tuesday and Yumeko from Kakegurui. I’ve been to about four anime cosplay events, and my favourite thing is seeing other people as enthusiastic about what we love around me. I love the feeling of being around people who understand why we do what we do. It’s a small-ish community, but it makes me happy.
Femi
I’ve cosplayed just once before this, and I did Itachi. My favourite anime is Naruto, but I like Akame Ga Kill. My big three are Naruto, Full Metal Alchemist and Akame Ga Kill. I’ve been watching anime since 2004, when I saw Ronin Kenshin. This might be my first anime con, but I’m impressed by how people went all out. They took their time to cosplay their characters, and I see the effort. I also love how this small community helps me meet like-minded people who love anime.
Kammie
I’ve been watching anime for two years. My favourite anime is One Piece and Kuroko no Basket. This is the second anime con event I’ve cosplayed at, and I love how happy everyone is. People come up to you to take pictures because they appreciate the effort you put into your cosplay. It’s amazing, and I love that we get to have this. For anyone trying to get into anime, it’s not too late. Watch Naruto, Food Wars, Demon Slayer and Black Clover as a starter. We’ll all be here for you.
Saiki
I’ve been watching anime for two years, since the pandemic. I’d heard about Naruto from primary school to uni, so it felt like a new starting point. I finally had time to try it because I was at home with nothing to do. I’ve seen almost 100 episodes since then because I kept watching them back-to-back to catch up. I’ve slowed down a lot, though. I love Saiki, it’s my comfort anime, but my favourites are Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood and Attack on Titan.
This is my first time cosplaying, so I tried to do something not so risky but still significant. I did Saiki since he’’s my favourite character. It was fun to source the material to make it happen. I’m new here, but obviously, anime is going mainstream, so I love the sense of community we get to have. People on the road might wonder what we’re doing, but we get each other. It’s fun to see people excited about something others consider a niche. It’s just fun to be around people you can relate with.
Bolu
I’ve been a big anime fan for five years now. Not to be cliche, but I love One Piece a lot. Then there’s One Piece, Haikyuu!! and Dororo. I love cosplaying. I cosplayed as No-Face for the first time last year and actually won the competition. I love seeing other people as weird as me, who share similar interests and love of anime, in the same place. It’s so cool. Where else will I see these many people looking like this in Lagos?
Crys.chan.cosplay
I’ve been watching anime since primary school; my first was Pokemon. My big three are My Hero Academia, Haikyuu!! and Fullmetal Alchemist. Anyone who wants to start off should try Demon Slayer or Noragami. For romance, try My Little Monster and Say I Love You.
I’m a regular cosplayer. In 2022, I did about 26 cosplays in total, and I make almost all the costumes from scratch. I love coming to community events like these ‘cause everyone else I know dismisses my interest, but here, everyone likes it as much as I do. And I love it.
After 25 years of adventure, Ash and Pikachu’s Pokemon storyline will end this year. It’s sad, but they’ve had over 1200 episodes of fun and battles defeated by the power of friendship, so they’ve tried.
Now that they no longer have work, here are some things they can do to fill the void.
Grow old
Now that he has time on his hands, he can consider looking like the 35-year-old man he’s supposed to be. I don’t know how Japan is o, but if he had a Nigerian mum, he’d have to drink anointing oil daily and go for deliverance.
I too, would go on a quest to avoid my family members, but this man child, who remains eternally ten might’ve taken it too far. Does he occasionally see his mom and absent father? Yes, but now that he’s jobless, he can spend even more time helping out at her restaurant and paying tax like the rest of us.
Start a business
I mean, he’s already the best pokemon trainer. If he starts a gym, people will pay to be taught. He too dey vex, so I don’t know about him being a good teacher, but it’s better than loafing around.
Get into tech
Will catching pokemon put food on his table? No. Tech is in, and pokemon is out. All he needs to do is buy a MacBook, catch a python, invest in turtlenecks and start talking about seed funding for something. Boom, a million billion in his account.
Rest
Even God rested on the seventh day. If he’s not fighting team rocket, he’s training one difficult pokemon or preparing for a battle — all for free. It’s okay, abeg. He should rest.
Become a travel blogger
He already has 25 years of experience travelling around. I’d watch his “get ready with me”, “what I eat in a day”, and “outfit check” videos any day. This job would fit him well.
Realise the world is cold and dark, and friendship isn’t everything
Optimism is out; pessimism is in. In real life, you can’t even defeat a bad-mouthed three-year-old with the power of love and friendship, not to talk of real-life challenges like stretching your January salary. He would understand sha. All the very many times he lost a fight prepared him for this moment.
Some anime characters go through a lot to eventually defeat their enemies and stay happy forever. But the ones in this article can’t relate. Overall best in suffering, all of them.
Kaneki Ken (Tokyo Ghoul)
Anime fans probably watched Tokyo Ghoul and decided never to go on a date. My bro thought he found love, went on a date and almost got eaten by the babe, who was a ghoul. After almost dying, all his organs were replaced by ghoul organs. Then he had to watch the illusion of his happy home crumble and his friends get tortured. Your hair would turn white too, if you had to go through all he did.
Imagine being transported to a universe that resets every time you reincarnate. Sounds fun, except Subaru always died in the most ridiculously painful ways. He’s been ripped apart by carnivorous bunnies, melted alive; he’s died more than 15 times in the span of hours, and he can’t tell anyone. My guy stays wishing for actual death that never comes.
Levi Ackerman (Attack on Titan)
When I first met this character, I wondered why he never smiled, and then, we saw his backstory, and it made sense. Levi lost his mum young, was groomed as a child vigilante and lost many of his friends. Let’s not add that he lives in a flesh-eating Titan-riddled world.
Ash Lynx (Banana Fish)
You know those characters that just go through too much for no reason? That’s Ash. He was abused as a child, involved in the mafia, had to watch his brother get shipped to war then learn he had a mindless death over some stupid drug. As if all those weren’t enough, he also had to witness his friend’s kidnap multiple times, lost his best friend and was imprisoned in a human experimentation hospital. Someone give this guy a hug, abeg.
Shiro (Deadman Wonderland)
Shiro isn’t even a good guy, but she still didn’t have to suffer like that. Imagine thinking you’ve found the perfect family to adopt you, then they start experimenting on you. Anime governments need to be beaten because, what? The constant injections made her body weak, and eventually, her mental state crumbled. All this babe wanted was love, and she got the opposite of it.
Akira Fudo (Devilman Crybaby)
Imagine your best friend was satan. Instead of enjoying his wickedness alone, mans forces you to turn into a demon and makes sure everyone you love gets killed for some weird utopia he wants for the both of you. Anytime you catch your breath, he’s like, “I raise you even more pain”.
Special mention: Guts (Beresk)
Imagine being born from a corpse, your best friend betraying you and being in immense pain and suffering until the day you die. No reincarnation for a better life, just back-to-back shege. On top of all that suffering, mans still went to hell. A1 in suffering for real.
You spend all your time gushing about how much of a Ghibli fan you are and dreaming of that one ramen bowl from Ponyo, but can you match the ghibli food to its movie?
Sunken Ships is a Zikoko series that explores the how and why of the end of all relationships — familial, romantic or just good old friendships.
Sarah* (23) and Timi* (24), moved from “friends of friends” to “close friends” because of their shared love for anime. But after his attempts to have sex with her didn’t work, their friendship crumbled.
Let’s start from the beginning
Sarah: Timi and I started off as friends of friends. We knew the same people and would occasionally see each other at events. Our interactions were “hello” and “hi” until March 2021, the day I met him at a friend’s place. I walked into them having an anime argument and joined in.
Then they started talking about an anime I didn’t have. Timi offered to send it to me with his hard drive. Shey if I had known what would happen between us, I’d have found another way to watch the anime?
What happened?
Sarah: He collected my number and later that week, called to ask if he could bring the drive over. It was a Saturday. The only reason I agreed was because I needed something to spend my weekend doing.
After he shared the anime with me, he started asking for updates on how it turned out and my conclusion on the earlier argument.
That’s how we got close. From ranting about anime to talking about non anime things, we became friends on our own.
What was the friendship like?
Sarah: It was pretty great. He was always there for me. I remember when he came to sit with me in my house because I had cramps and was scared of being alone. We read together, attended parties and were involved in each other’s lives. His younger sister and I kept in touch quite often.
We got so close in the span of four months people started making wedding and marriage jokes. It annoyed me whenever they did, but Timi always laughed and told me not to worry about it.
He became my best friend and the marriage jokes continued. I wasn’t surprised they thought like that. He was in my house a lot. Sometimes, when people come to visit him, I’m in his house half-naked. I cook for him and bring to his house. We go out together to watch movies or beach dates. I enjoyed spending time with him, but I didn’t want to date him.
He didn’t fit the bill for what I wanted out of my life. I love him to death but he can be a bit irresponsible. Plus, he’s the kind of person who’s a great friend but a terrible boyfriend, and it’s caused a couple of fights between us. I didn’t want to put myself through that.
Sarah: The first time he tried to kiss me. It was during a house party in February [2022] and he was drunk. Luckily for him, I decided I wouldn’t drink a lot, so I kept watching over him. At one point, I lost him when he said he was going to pee. When he finally resurfaced, he grabbed my face and said he missed me then he tried to kiss me. Since I was sober, I could dodge the kiss. He had a mini tantrum, talking about how he’s been wanting to have sex with me for a while now and I keep fucking everyone but him.
I was shocked because I barely had sex with anyone. I chalked it up to drunk hysterics and got us home. The next morning, he didn’t act like anything happened, so I dropped it.
The next time he tried something like that was two weeks later. I was cooking stew and he came behind me in the kitchen and started kissing my neck. I could feel his erection through his trousers. I felt weird so I pushed him off me with the excuse that I needed to use the bathroom.
Did you ever confront him about it?
Sarah: Not until the time he actually made a proper move on me in May. We were in the house together, drinking and watching a romantic movie like we do once in a while when he started rubbing my thigh. He was telling me how much he could treat me better than the men in my life, that’s why it was unfair I was sleeping with people who made me cry when he was right there. I told him to stop, but he didn’t remove his hand.
He kept trying to make me “see his side” — that he’s been here doing all of these things for me, why don’t I want to give him a chance? I told him I didn’t see him that way and he got angry. He shouted at me and that I didn’t deserve good things and stormed off.
Wow
Sarah: Na real wow o. I called him the next day to find out what was going on, but he didn’t pick my calls. I went to his house but he didn’t open the door for me. I was heartbroken because someone I thought was my friend was only around because he wanted to sleep with me? Did all the time we spent together mean nothing to him? I was heartbroken for months. My friends really rallied around me and helped me return all his property.
Did he ever try reaching out?
Sarah: Yes, he did. He texted to say he was sorry in September, but my best friend replied and told him to shove the apology up his smelling yansh. That made me laugh. He should go to hell.
If you’ve ever woken up pissed at your mum for that ₦5k she didn’t return when you were six, this quiz will help you select a mum who wouldn’t steal your money. Take the quiz!
Every two business days, someone drops a hot take that anime is for kids, and you know what? They’re right. Only children would want to watch a bunch of characters run around and fight people that are not fighting them. That’s peak joblessness. Here’s all the proof you need that anime is for kids.
Anime is too soft and emotional
As an adult, why are you watching something that’ll make you feel warm when news channels exist? You better call all the kids in your neighbourhood together so they can watch Grave of Fireflies or Attack on Titan. Those are the kinds of shows only kids deserve to see abi?
The main characters are kids, so only kids can relate to them
No, think about it; how can you relate to a twelve-year-old boy looking for his dad and gallivanting around with his little friend with no troubles whatsoever? What’s realistic about that? As an adult, why would you be watching Hunter X Hunter? What life lessons can you gain? Please rethink your life choices.
See, they totally agree
When characters die, it’s cute
We all know that death is not cute in real life. Indeed since anime is for kids, they’ll avoid the grimness of death, right? It’s not like they show splattered blood in Chainsaw Man or a half-eaten, Gala-looking human being in Attack on Titan. No, they just put soft flowers around the cute dead character. People don’t just explode after becoming curses because of some evil antagonist. It’s for kids, nau.
Anime has the softest themes
I mean, it’s a genre for kids; it’s totally okay for kids to watch a psychopath that kill people for fun by writing their names in a black book based on his moral high horse. It’s not like seeing Ryuk from Death Note will scar them for life or anything. Just pure wholesomeness and clear blue skies.
All they do is go on little quests to activate the power of friendship
What’s the fun in watching something like that? Only kids enjoy watching cartoons. It’s not like anime characters are known for occasionally trying to kill their friends over small things. In fact, I recommend letting kids watch Devilman Crybaby to experience true friendship at its peak.
awww besties
Hentai is age-appropriate for kids
You definitely want to interrupt your kid’s regular programming of cococmelon with possibly tentacle sex scenes in anime. I mean, sex education should be taught early, abi? So what if they show a lot of problematic stuff? A genre for kids can do no wrong.
Violence is always the answer
Now come on, that child in your life shouldn’t still be watching stuffed animals teach them life lessons that help them grow to be kind people. They need to watch anime series about a man who occasionally turns into a person with a chainsaw for a head and a chainsaw on his arms to help him fight devils. Yep. That’s something I’d definitely let a child see before they go to bed.
It’s one thing to call yourself an otaku and another thing to be able to answer questions only an otaku’s will know. If you get up to five we owe you twenty naira coaster biscuit.
You might think you know what type of anime fan you are, but this quiz knows better. Take it if you’re bold.
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How many of these have you seen?
You got #{score}/#{total}!
You’re a newbie! It’s super cool that you’re getting into anime. Don’t forget to take the ones you didn’t know as recommendations!
You got #{score}/#{total}!
Only a former fan would have watched the ones you picked. We don’t miss oh, dey your dey.
You got #{score}/#{total}!
You are a casual fan! overall best in being unproblematic and watching one series for three months, I see you.
You got #{score}/#{total}!
You are the activist! You don’t just watch any anime because you can’t stand to see how women are oversexualized. don’t tell anybody but you’re the best!
You got #{score}/#{total}!
As the manga reader, you haven’t seen a lot because your top priority is reading the manga so you can give people unwanted spoilers.
You got #{score}/#{total}!
You don’t just enjoy anime, you want to be those characters you love and that’s why you’re the cosplayer.
You got #{score}/#{total}!
You are the elitist. there is no anime you’ve not seen. You think your favorite anime is the best and your favorite hobby is arguing.
I love how anime watchers are a mix of different and exciting people these days.
There are the ones who never let us forget that they watched older shows like Sailor Moon, Dragonball, and Yu-Gi-Oh. The newbies probably started with Tokyo Ghoul, Dororo, Demon Slayer or Fire Force.
The elitist
If you hate that you like anime sometimes, it’s probably because you met some of these people. They believe in gatekeeping anime and are always ready to mock newbies. They’ve seen every anime ever made, and no matter how great your favourite anime is, it’s immediately mid to them. Why? Because they said so. Lord help you if you mistakenly tell them that you watch English-dubbed anime. They think they have the best taste and every conversation you have with them ends in an argument.
They’re so innocent, always asking for recommendations and watching everything. They don’t argue because they haven’t seen enough shows. These ones still get shocked when they stay awake till six in the morning watching anime.
The indie watcher
The indie watchers think they’re better than everyone else because they don’t watch mainstream anime. They kind of are, to be honest. If they recommend an anime, chances are, it’ll be very artsy but good.
They become a little overbearing when you tell them you’ve seen an anime they’ve watched. The next thing it’s, “It wasn’t even that good”, “ I sha watched it first” or “I don’t even like it like that”, because God forbid you have good taste.
The casual fan
These people pride themselves as the most unproblematic types of fans, and they are. The causal fans have seen every popular anime, a bunch of indie anime, and at least one old anime like Sailor Moon just because. They don’t care about the subbed or dubbed discourse. Wetin concern them? They’re big fans, but their whole personalities don’t revolve around anime. They think anime fandoms are a little problematic, so they’re always observing from a distance, and I don’t even blame them.
The cosplayer
Not only do they love certaincharacters, they also want to live them out physically. They spend so much time detailing their outfits and rewatching the shows they like to master the mannerisms of the characters they want to cosplay. They’re almost as wholesome as the newbies, and it’s nice seeing them be so enthusiastic about what they love — when they’re not over-sexualising a character’s outfit.
If you’ve never met one of these people, you don’t know what God has done for you. They are almost as annoying as the elitists because how have you only seen one anime and somehow think it’s the best? I’m talking to you Naruto lovers, and it’s always them. They know everything imaginable about the one show they like, and that’s about it. They’re only fun to be around if you enjoy their favourite show.
The former fan
We get it, you’re older, and suddenly, anime is childish to you. Peak cinema, to them, is every bad series about someone breaking out of prison or some weird obscure psychological thriller. For people who claim to hate anime a lot, their entire personality is the fact that they “Hate anime” and think that “Anime is for losers”.
These kinds of bad vibes make people miserable; just saying.
The Seiyuu nitpickers
These types of fans make you feel like you’re a terrible person. What do you mean you can tell that the same person voiced Dabi from My Hero Academia and Zenitsu from Demon Slayer? They even have a favourite voice actor and know every character voiced by that person. Watching anime with them can be annoying; you’ll hear complaints that the voice acting doesn’t fit the character. Okay boss, go and do it and let me hear word.
The Manga readers
These people usually mind their business and read their manga whenever a new chapter drops. You barely hear from them until they watch the anime of whatever manga they’ wee reading, and then it’ll bes everybody’s problem. They’ll complain about how one thing is missing from the source manga, spoil characters’ deaths for non-readers and boast about how the fights were better in the manga. Every small conversation ends with them saying, “Just read the manga.” Okay na, I don’t want to read. Come and beat me.
The Activists
Say all you want about them; they are my favourite types of anime fans. They are criticising problematic aspects of anime culture, like the fetishisation of women in anime with ginormous boobs, the lack of strong female leads in anime, how Attack on Titan is every imperialist dream, etc. They’re by far my favourite types of fans because it’s about time people called out all these things.
And it had me thinking, what if the JujutsuKaisen was set in Nigeria instead of Tokyo, Japan? The characters already go through enough as it is. Imagine adding being Nigerian to their problems?
JujutsuKaisen follows the life of Yuji Itadori as he joins a secret organisation of Jujutsu Sorcerers to eliminate a powerful Curse named Ryomen Sukuna, whom Yuji’s body currently hosts.
I re-imagined what Jujutsu Kaisen would be like if it were set in Nigeria.
Panda would have been a dog or a giant mosquito
I mean, if they are picking the animal based on an animal that best represents the country Jujutsu Kaisen is set in, and this being Nigeria, it’s only fitting that either an ekuke named “Bingo” or a mosquito would be our choice. So what if Google says it’s an Eagle? As a Nigerian, you will see more bingos and mosquitoes before ever spotting an Eagle.
The places with the most cursed energy would be government offices and bus stops
In Jujutsu Kaisen, curses mostly lurk around secondary schools and hospitals, but if Jujutsu Kaisen was set in Nigeria? Every single government office would be full of curses because everyone curses them at least twice daily. As for bus stops, have you seen how people push each other, fight, and try to kill each other to enter danfos? God abeg.
It even already looks cursed.
Nobara’s weapon would have been a pestle
Don’t ask me why but it’s just fitting. That babe has the anger of 20 Nigerian mothers, and you’re telling me a hammer would do the job for her? Have you seen a Nigerian woman handle a pestle before? One hit and the stupid curse would start to think about its life.
Nanami would have been a banker by day while selling ties on Instagram by night
Outside writers, Nigerian bankers are the only other people who look like they hate their jobs. But not so much for Nanami. He needs the money so he can buy nice suits. He’d probably also own a tie shop that no one actually patronises, but that won’t matter to him because my man is too busy using them to fight people anyway.
Every time Gojo jumps, they’d try to catch him and deliver him
Gojo would try to defy physics, as usual, flying without needing to leap off buildings and sooner or later, he would get caught. Next thing you know, they’d be shoving buckets of anointing oil down his throat as per evil spirit.
Large dimension fight inside traffic
Usually, when they want to fight demons or curses, they’d go to a large space and open a dimension so people don’t get injured in the real world due to casualties. Where would we find space in this country? Take Lagos, for example. They’d have to fight in traffic last last. That’s not even something new sha.
Legwork in dashiki in the end scene
Everyone loves the Jujutsu Kaisenlost in paradise end theme, but if this anime was set in Nigeria? Legwork straight and football jersey tops or dashiki. Asake would also somehow sing the theme song.
Their school uniform would be khaki, and check
One super cool thing about Jujutsu Kaisen is the school uniform. Every student has a unique way they wear theirs but individualism in a Nigerian school? Come off it, please. All of them, from Gojo to Itadori, would wear different colours of check shirts and brown Khaki pants made from the weakest material known to man.
The school probably wouldn’t even exist because where’s the profit on top people that want to kill you for helping them?
Jujutsu sorcerers are a part of a secret organisation, so they don’t get paid. Unfortunately, that won’t work in Nigeria because how would they risk their lives to save people while still needing to be protected from the people they went to save? Hell, the Lagos government would make them pay flying tax and exorcism tax until they closed the school last last.
One of the best romantic anime filmmakers, Makoto Shinkai, creator of Your Name, is releasing a new romantic anime called Suzume: Locking up the Doors. It already looks like it’ll break my heart into a million pieces, as usual. But who said romance meant “they both end up together”?
None of the romantic anime in this list has the perfect male lead, or perfect stories romance usually sells. Hell, there’s also no fan service. And that’s what makes them better than the rest. So, If anime’s usual gra-gra is not for you, you’ll enjoy these.
Rascal Does Not Dream Of Bunny Girl Senpai
I will never understand why this anime is titled this way, but it is perfect. The anime follows the life of Sakuta Azusagawa, a high school student drawn to girls suffering from a condition called “Adolescence Syndrome”. An illness that manifests based on their insecurities. While it focuses on him helping these girls, the highlight is the first story with Mai, an actress who people suddenly couldn’t see. Sakuta and Mai’s relationship has a slow but satisfying buildup. As annoying as Sakuta can be, sometimes you’d find yourself rooting for them.
I watched Sing Yesterday for Me for the director, Yoshiyuki Fujiwara, who directed Attack on Titan. I knew to expect great storytelling, and it delivered. This anime rewrote what a classic love triangle could look like if each character had a bit more depth. It was highly realistic in its approach to love and friendships. There’s no way to explain this without spoiling it, but you won’t regret watching this anime.
Yuri on Ice
Yuri on Ice is a story of how someone’s love and belief in you can encourage you to be the best version of yourself, even if that is a pork cutlet bowl.
They never actually kiss or date, but you can’t see Yuri and Victor interact and think it is friendship, please. From the opening theme to every other song in the OST, just be prepared to have your heart in your mouth. This series is romance at its finest, and maybe one day, we’ll get a second season.
Your Name
You can’t talk about romantic anime without mentioning Your Name. The anime follows Mitsuha and Taki, stuck in a freaky Friday situation where they swap bodies. Mitsuha is a girl from the countryside, while Taki is a city boy living in Tokyo. Their love story should have been doomed from the start because even the forces pulling them together were tearing them apart. This anime is beautifully made with an OST that will be stuck in your head for days.
Nana
Nana is one of those anime films you need to see at least once in your life. Admittedly, while watching it, I might start to feel like something that “Should have been a movie”, but that’s just because it is slow-paced. Nana Komatsu moved to be with her boyfriend in Tokyo and met Nana Osaki, a punk rock queen musician pursuing her dream. They soon become very close. Living in the same house with chemistry that the sharpest knife can’t cut and multiple kisses type of close. But more than that, Nana is full of realistic characters, spectacular events and good music. times. Sometimes you’ll feel like you want to deck all the characters, but it’s still worth watching.
I Want To Eat Your Pancreas
I’ve realised that the weirder the title of a romantic anime, the more tears you will shed. I Want To Eat Your Pancreas will break your heart, and you will still say thank you. It’s a story about a girl named Sakura who has a terminal pancreatic illness and makes a list of things she wants to do before she dies. Naturally, an amebo boy named Haruki finds out about her secret list and makes it his mission to help her. As these things usually happen, they fall in love, but she’s running out of time.
Komi Can’t Communicate
This anime is about a girl called Komi who everyone worships, except she doesn’t talk. That’s until she meets Tadano, the only person to figure out she had trouble talking to people. Tadano makes it his mission to help her make 100 friends; if that is not love, I don’t know what love is. Every one of Komi’s little wins and cute interaction with Tadano and the friends they make along the way makes this anime so great. Enjoy!
Spoiler Alert: If you’ve never seen Hunter x Hunter, think twice before reading this because there are major spoilers ahead.
Twelve days ago, I wrote about how falling in love made me delve into the world of anime. Sure, I started because of love, but I stayed for the show. Now, I’ve almost finished watching Hunter x Hunter, and I have things to say and one big question to ask: Are the creators of the anime okay?
Arcs
My friend sold this anime to me with points like the power of friendship, underestimated characters and a simple plot of a young boy trying to find his father. She didn’t lie, but she skipped some essential points.
I thought the hunter games arc where they had to pass a few tests to get their hunter license was all I would have to deal with, and because only a few episodes were available on Netflix, I assumed I was safe. LOL. When Gon, Killua and the friends they made tried to pass the games, I was stressed out because of the uncertainty. Honestly, take me back to when that was my only problem. At episode 106 (on this totally legal anime site), I’m scared my sons might not live to see another day because this is way different from everything they’ve had to deal with. This is something nobody has had to deal with. There hasn’t been a case where Chimera ants get strong enough to be able to take over the world.
I keep trying to convince myself that my sons are the main characters and bad bitches don’t die easily, but it’s hard.
My mental health hasn’t been the same since I started watching, yet Gon and Killua, the people who put their lives in danger, are playing games and running around—acting like they didn’t just increase my blood pressure. Don’t they consider therapy? Does the hunter license not come with health insurance? Why are they acting like everything is okay?
My love for Gon and Killua extended to Kurapika and Leorio, and they’ve earned my full trust and respect. So when Kurapika had to fight the Phantom Troupe? I couldn’t contain it.
Texts I sent to the person that made me start watching HunterxHunter
How is one person making me go through all these emotions in 12 minutes? God, abeg.
After watching the Phantom Troupe and Greed Island arcs, I thought I was invincible. The creators saved the absolute fuckery for when they’ve got you hooked on the show. Because what in God’s name is the Chimera ant arc?
Stress doesn’t begin to cover it, and I’m not even done watching yet. There are still six more days to the battle with the King. Gon and Meleon (the chameleon that can turn invisible but is actually an ant with a human mind) just became partners, and an octopus that’s actually an ant is trying to save Killua’s life. Man-eating ants with tails, wings and powers are trying to take over the world. How do I tell the normal people in my life about this without sounding like a crazy person?
Now, I understand why people binge-watch anime. You’re about to leave to focus on life, but something happens and now you’re saying, “One more episode”. If not for work, I would do nothing but watch anime all day.
One thing I didn’t realise at the time I was sending the above texts is that the Chimera ant arc is where they really showed the power of friendship. I saw Killua cry because of how scared he was that he couldn’t protect Gon, and I lost it. I just wish I got to see Kurapika and Leorio a lot more.
During the Phantom troupe arc, I was already rooting for Kurapika. I hated the Spider’s guts, and I wanted all of them gone. I mean, look at what they did to Kurapika’s family. Tell me why four episodes in, I’m crying, feeling bad for murderers and thieves. Yoshihiro Togashi, na you do me this one.
Whenever they show an enemy’s backstory, I know I’ll be unable to hate them because they’ve suffered as a collective. Poverty? Abuse? Hunger? Name it; they’ve suffered it. It reminds you that life isn’t black and white. While some people take their suffering and try to turn it into greatness, others hurt and hurt others. It doesn’t excuse their actions, but it makes you feel a bit sorry for them. I think that’s why Gon hardly kills his enemies. He knows. Killua, on the other hand? He doesn’t give a shit about you and your daddy.
If you’re not sympathising with a villain because their backstory is sad or you can see the emptiness in their eyes, it’s because they’re hot. Case in point, Feitan (who I call Feyitan), Zazan, Pitou, Shizuku, Chrollo, Misha and Hisoka.
I know they’re all bad guys, but this is a safe space, and I’ll say evil adds to their appeal. I wholeheartedly believe I can calm Feitan down when he’s about to explode. If anything, I think Ging is the real baddie in all this. Gon wouldn’t have had to go through fire and brimstone to find him if he had been a present father. How does a man tell his 12-year-old son, “Catch me if you can?” It’s giving very much child abuse and begs the question, “Is there no child protection service in this anime?” Why are so many children fighting? What are the adults doing?
Villains you feel sorry for and flawed heroes, I think HunterxHunter thought of everything. The biggest mistake many people make is assuming heroes are selfless people who make decisions for the good of humankind. But heroes like Gon and Killua act based on their selfish interests; it just so happens to be for the good of humanity.
Gon faces every villain because he assumes it’ll finally get him strong enough to meet his dad. Killua is just in it because he’s bored, loves Gon and wants to help him find his dad. Sure, Gon is a genuinely lovely person who just wants to save everyone, but the ginger he has is because of his dad. Plus, it sometimes leads him to act without thinking and put himself in situations where he would survive, but others who are not as strong will not. Can you blame him? He’s 12. Acting without thinking is what children do.
Killua is not even a conventional hero. He’s an assassin who wanted to quit. If he didn’t meet Gon, his life would’ve gone on a totally different trajectory. Along the line, you see just how much he evolves into the role of a hero(ish).
My favourite thing about this anime is how human all the characters feel. They’re multifaceted, just like people in the real world. They might do a nice thing today and a terrible thing tomorrow. I’ve not met a completely bad character yet, not even Hisoka. Neither have I met a completely good character. They have their little quirks, making it a lot more fun.
I’ve not finished watching, and I believe my mental health will worsen, but I’m excited for what’s in store for me.
I’ll update you when I’m finally done, so send me love and keep me in your prayers because I definitely need it.
As an anime fan, people will never truly understand the pains and struggles you face to find the perfect place to watch anime. But I get it.
Here’s everything that happens when you watch anime illegally.
When it’s English-dubbed, even though it’s labelled “English-subbed”
You don’t know heartbreak until this nonsense happens to you. You’ll finally find the anime you’ve been looking for, it’s clear and you’ve passed through all the pop-up ads. Only for the theme song to finish playing, and the most Asian-looking face starts speaking the worst American accent. It’s to go and sleep. One day for the thief, innit?
It somehow always chooses the worst scenes to hang
We don’t talk enough about how anime disgraces us. If I had a dollar for every time I had to explain to someone that nothing weird was happening in whatever anime I was watching, it just stalled at an odd-looking scene, I would have enough to pay to watch anime legally. I need a support group, please. I’m sick of defending myself.
The fake invites from milfs to “come over”
Sometimes, I wonder if people actually click those links. Like, ma’am, I’m a focused person, please. I came here to watch animated characters shout out their attacks so their opponents can win easily. I’m not here to find love.
Only finding the chibi version of the anime
One day, this will be my 13th reason. I can’t count how many chibi versions of anime I saw when I first started watching anime. I have nothing against chibi anime oh, just give me the one I asked for first, and then, maybe I’ll come back for this version when I’m bored. I can never unsee the chibi version of Dazia from Bungo Stray Dogs trying to commit Suicide.
When you can’t find the anime is on the site because they didn’t use the English title
Sometimes, I wonder if this anime obsession is worth all the suffering I go through to watch something that’ll probably break my heart. Who randomly knows how to spell Kono Subarashii Sekai ni Shukufuku wo! in a hurry? If you do, this is not a safe space for you, please.
The “You can’t last 10 seconds in this game”
Okay, but did I come to your site to play one yeye game? I came to watch anime, so why are you asking me to put my card details? Also, why do they think we won’t last? Do they know our capabilities? How do you come to that conclusion on a site where people watch hundreds of episodes of a show at a go? Mtceww, unserious people.
When you finally find the anime, and there’s no subtitle
It’s shit like this that makes most anime fans learn Japanese. If this hasn’t happened to you at least twice, how does it feel to be God’s favourite? This is the final boss and where I usually give up because anime will not kill me for my mother, abeg. Nonsense and rubbish.
When you grow up without siblings, the television becomes your constant companion. If you had parents who spoiled you more than the average person, it meant no restriction on tv. I grew up watching Big Brother, Sex and the City, Jerry Springer and many others.
Movies with cheesy, predictable plots and over-dramatised action raised me. They helped me develop unrealistic expectations of love, romance and sex. It took growing up to realise not everything they say in movies is real, but that didn’t stop me from watching. They became my escape from reality and fulfilled my intense need for fairytales.
My movie taste is simple. I like romantic comedies with happy endings, dramas with a sprinkle of humour and movies about young adults figuring out their way in life. I barely watch animation that isn’t targeted at age zero to five.
During the lockdown of 2020, while the whole world and my grandma baked banana bread at home, I decided I wanted to leave my movie comfort zone. I was chronically online, and many people I followed kept talking about how they spent most of their days binging anime. Amine watchers felt like a community of people, and if there was anything I needed in 2020, it was community.
When I asked for recommendations, and I specified they had to be short — romantic comedies didn’t take me up to three hours to finish, and they’d built a precedent for how I consumed movies — Seven Deadly Sins was what almost everyone threw at me, so I decided to give it a try. One season later, the comments Meliodas made to Elizabeth made me too uncomfortable, and the fight scenes made me more anxious than I cared to admit. I wanted to give up on anime as a whole, but I felt I could muster the courage to try another one.
A couple of weeks later, I tried Kakegurui, and after having an anxiety attack in episode 4, I hung my anime cap. It was okay that this wasn’t something I could get into. I could find my community elsewhere.
My friends tried to help me find something I could enjoy, but either the themes were too sad or the episodes too many. There was nothing I considered perfect for me, so they stopped trying. When anyone asked me if I watched anime, I’d shake my head and tell them it triggered my anxiety. It got them to leave me alone and made it seem less like a “me” problem and more of a mental health problem.
That was how it was for the next two years of my life. I didn’t understand the “big three” discourse, or how Goku is strong enough to fight God, and I didn’t care. Then in July 2022, I fell in love with an otaku.
There’s this thing about love that makes you want to share parts of yourself with the people you care about. So we sat down and watched one of my favourite movies, Legally Blonde. I watched her face every time she laughed, smiled, got excited, or scrunched it up in disgust at a character’s actions. It gave me a new reason to love her, and now, she’s one of the many reasons why I love Legally Blonde.
l wanted her to have something like that with me. I wanted to share the excitement with her and have her associate an anime that means so much to her with me, just like I did with her. So when I saw her favourite anime had come to Netflix, I made up my mind to give it a try.
I was anxious and scared because if I ended up not liking it, it was like I’d have one thing less to talk to her about, but wanting me was enough to prove she had great taste. I was prepared for all the worst possible scenarios, like hating her favourite characters or episode and even having an anxiety attack. What I didn’t anticipate was watching 40 episodes in about a week.
A part of me wants to believe even though I started watching it because of her, I enjoy it enough to continue. I text her whenever I’m watching a scene I don’t understand, and I make jokes about the characters. I feel alive in a way I can’t explain. Hearing the excitement in her voice, with every episode I explain, and how she has to force herself not to give me spoilers? It’s love.
On a Sunday in September, I was sad, and she suggested we watch it together. Every time I screamed, shouted and paused to take a deep breath, she’d laugh like it was the funniest thing she’d ever witnessed. I felt connected to her in a way I didn’t think was possible, and now, I’m reading HisokaxMachi fanfiction.
Two years ago, I never would’ve considered this a part of my life, talk less of a part I openly talk about. I ordered a Gon and Killua hoodie because those are my children, and I asked her to make me a list of all her favourite animes, so I can watch each one.
Love makes you do stupid things, but it also allows you give certain things a chance. Maybe in a couple of months, I’d be joining people to shout that Naruto is overrated, but who knows?
With everyone rocking the same hairstyles these days, wouldn’t it be so great to stand out? So what if your hair stylist can’t pull off the styles on this list? That’s not the point. The point’s you’ll stand out, and that’s all that mattress. Don’t thank us just yet!
Sunny’s look from Torioko
No, tell me that this lewk is not achievable. Is hair dye expensive? Yes, will all your family members deny you outside? Also, yes, but you’ll look so original with your alté aesthetic. If you’re an ally for queer people, what’s wearing the rainbow on your head to you? Talk Valentina!
I know you might be thinking, what’s so special about a blonde afro? Well, this man’s hair is made of 24-karat gold. If you have that kind of gold, have you not made it? Just go to your mother’s dressing table, melt as many of her gold chains as possible, and carry them on your head. The best part is that no-one can even steal it because it’s on your head.
Umemiya’s rolls from Shaman King
Since all the styles from before the internet age are back in vogue, this should be a breeze. Just comb your hair up, look for a big hair roller and wrap your head around it like ₦2k shawarma. Add pins to keep it together, and you’re good to go. A trend setter, fashion extraordinaire.
Iris from Pokemon
Remember those days when your mum would pack your hair in a tight bun, and it’ll get loose because you kept touching it? That’s what this look is giving but with effortless styling that doubles as a pocket to hide things. Do you know the amount of food you can sneak in on an plane with hair like that?
Kenpachi’s look from Bleach
Imagine entering danfo with this look? The conductor will charge you extra for looking so fly! If your hair is not long enough, don’t worry, I got you. Remember how we used to wrap biscuit nylons into cones as kids? Do as many as possible, then take glue and stick it on your head. You can paint to your desired colour, and voila, a walking chuku ckuku.
Yasuhiro’s locs fromDanganronpa
If you people don’t rush this one, as a loc-head, I will beat you to it. Imagine walking around like this? People would be afraid to touch you because how did you do it? Your gel budget might be through the roof, but anything to look fly. Samson no do reach this one.
Quick question, how do you feel about becoming the poster child for the “Black kids with blonde hair” search results? Take inspo from the Velaryon family in House of the Dragon and see that it bangs. Relax your hair and bleach it and there you go! If you like, you can tie blonde hair extensions to your hair for length. There’s beauty in this life, but your beauty with this hairstyle will be discovery.
Franky from One Piece
Wow, look at this hair! If police stop you in traffic, you can just transform your hair into a cannon. I love it. You would be untouchable. You’d also be single because, come on, you can’t have your cake and eat it. No one will want to compete with your hair for attention.
Saitama from One-Punch Man
You know your hairstyle is that bitch when it ensures you’re added to the will. Imagine visiting your dad with a haircut like this in an age where everyone’s keeping an afro or locking their hair. He’d be so proud. This hair shows that you’re ready to own a sienna, prepared to wear a green shirt and purple trousers to your banker job and beg interns for their food. Indeed, a mark of good home training. You can’t go wrong with a good skin cut.
One thing that ironically unites anime fans and anime haters is — you guessed it — the overused clichés. One group hates anime because of these things; the other loves anime just because of it. If you don’t know which is which? Sorry, I can’t help, but I can point out these cliches and you decide where you stand.
Glasses that blank out
Can we all just admit how goated anime characters that do this thing are? This glasses thing will never not be cool! That’s how you know the character is about to make a profoundly wise or foolish statement. Is the move always a tad bit over dramatic? Yes, but what’s not to love?
Every super cool anime protagonist has that weird, eccentric teacher who uses unconventional means to shape them into heroes. Key examples are Ginpachi and Gojo, etc. You just can’t exist as an anime’s main lead without these weirdo teachers. Also, haven’t we all met an eccentric teacher in our lifetime? It’s cute, please.
When they unsheathe their sword but it has already sliced someone
I know it’s not possible; you know it’s not possible, but it always looks super cool. Especially when they show how the hero did it: opened the sword, wiped the sweat off his head, ran around the room, kicked the villain’s stomach and then sliced him. But all we saw was the slice. Even just thinking about it has me excited. If this thing doesn’t make you happy, then I don’t know for you o.
The gravity-defying haircuts
Not only will their hair defy every law of physics, but it’ll also be the brightest neon colour. I just want to know how their stylists do it..
The beach day
What is life without a beach day filler episode with no fighting or chaos, just ocean waves and good vibes? It’s like the calm before the storm; the rest before the chaos. Anime will give you the most relaxing beach episode, and the next thing you know, someone is dying in the next episode. I love it, sha; it helps you prepare for the worst.
The out-of-place side character
This happens so often it doesn’t even stress med anymore. All the characters will look as normal as anime gets, and then suddenly, a character with the roundest looking head and flattest, most expressionless face will appear from nowhere. They’re usually comic relief sha, so you may eventually find yourself liking random characters like these.
The one episode that’s just fight scenes everywhere
Anyone who has followed a long anime by mistake or on purpose knows what I’m talking about. That endless episode with fight scenes lasting the length of five more episodes can be fun because, yes, fight! But that’s also when you know an important character is about to die. There’s no winning with these people.
Some anime characters are so wicked that Patience Ozokwor could learn a thing or two from them. These four Nigerians have some passionate opinions on those characters.
Toyo (She/They)
Lowkey, everything about Dio Brando’s character gives me the ick. Anyone who watches JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and likes him is a psychopath. This man is from hell, — literally since he’s a vampire, hit a dog and then burnt the dog. Why would anyone fight something that can’t fight back? Even Patience Ozokwor used to manage to have small emotions and just poison things.
Dio Brando also turned a woman into a vampire and made her eat her child. If I had to describe him to someone, I’d say imagine if a genie, a character from Sailor Moon and a bodybuilder had a child.
Shelah – They/She/Him
The anime character I find wicked is Yagami Light from Death Note. Nobody is wickeder than that dude, abeg. He had a god complex, and I honestly don’t understand how people keep saying he’s right! HE’S NOT!
He found a death note owned by a Shinigami, and the rule is that any human who finds the note can kill anyone by just writing their names in the book. At first, he started writing names of criminals, but this nigga graduated to killing his father (not technically, but still). In total, he killed a total of 124,925 people with that note. There’s simply no justification for that.
Kurome-chan – She/Her
Prime Minister Honest from Akame ga Kill because he’s a fool. An idiotic, selfish, irresponsible character. He was self-involved and willing to let everybody in the kingdom die because of his ambitions. He’s like if Uncle Iroh from Avatar was evil and heartless. I don’t know why they kept calling him honest, someone that is the best at being manipulative and emotionally abusive to everybody. Dfkm. If I catch that guy, it’s on sight.
Niel – He/Him
I watch anime and read manga and manhua a lot, and so far, the evilest character I’ve come across is All For One from My Hero Academia. He emotionally and physically abused his son Shigaraki to the point that he became out of control. Shigaraki started to use his decay quirk to destroy things so that people could feel and relive the same pain he felt in his childhood days with All For One. I also want to use this chance to say that all the people in the hidden leaf village from Naruto are wicked. How can you bully and shun an innocent child, unaware of whatever evil demon was inside him and still come to depend on him consistently to save you? A bunch of foolish nonsense people.
I’m not nosy, but my 17-year-old junior brother is always talking about how funny the guys on his anime group chats are. I was bored, so I begged him to send me an invite.
As someone who spent an uncomfortable amount of time on anime group chats when I was 16, I know how messy they can be, but funny? I had to see.
People of earth, this boy lied. All these boys do is argue and share hentai links, and now, I’m worried my brother’s humour is broken. Here are the things I noticed in my two days on the group chat.
They don’t text during the day
I learnt this the hard way when I joined in the morning and tried to introduce myself. I got the airing of a lifetime. E pain me small, but who has died from being aired? Exactly, no one.
They all flock out like evil spirits at 11 p.m. because that’s when their midnight data starts working, so they can download anime and fight each other.
One of the rare occasions when they messaged during the day. The next reply was by 7.
These boys might stay single forever
The first thing I saw when I joined was a link to Hentai Haven. Why are they casually sharing porn? It was at this point I decided to read their group’s info, and I became scared for my life.
I wish they were joking, but people actually introduced themselves this way.
The lack of girls
It’s not that there are no girls on the group chat. They just don’t talk, and I don’t blame them.
The one time I saw a girl talk, she mentioned that she didn’t like Vinland Saga, and they dragged her for at least an hour. Then they started to question if she liked anime at all.
I guess this gives you a preamble of why I lasted only two days.
They’re always arguing
I’m not policing what these boys do with their midnight data, but why would you use it to argue about characters that don’t even exist in the same anime? When you could be downloading or streaming anime?
Sir, first of all, what is this name?
Then, there’s this guy who either watches the back of the TV or likes to start drama.
I’d already braced myself for an insane amount of “new anime” conversations. But there’s this one guy who’s always trying to get the group to watch older anime by making memes like these:
One Piece should have ranked first, but this is fine too.
To be on this group chat, you have to have thick skin because they will insult you for stupid takes
After spending time with these guys, I’ve come to the conclusion that anime fans are not very nice people. Why are you arguing with someone over a fictional character? I say this while knowing that if someone comes for my fave I will insult their ancestors tbh.
This guy deserved the insults, why would you disrespect Haikyuu?
Society will never be free from comrade memes
For two days, I felt trapped in “the bad place”. You can’t scroll without seeing at least 10 comrade memes. Now, I live in fear of seeing these things when I close my eyes:
Dear Uvuvwevwevwe onyetenvewve ugwemubwem ossas, your mother did not name you Shikamaru. Do you know how unnerving it is to see a pop-up WhatsApp notification from someone called Orochimaru? What happened to nicknames like Pweshyboi001 or GangsterTobs123? Two days on this group chat and I tapped into my inner Nigerian father.
The one who said he has mental issues did not lie.
They drag other cinematic universes into their problems
There’s always that one guy ready to shout, “Batman will beat Goku” or “ Superman will beat One Punch Man”. From where to where? Comparing Marvel or DC characters to anime characters makes no sense because in what multiverse will they have to fight each other?
I’m anti-military rule, but this guy was promptly removed, which made me happy.
I considered staying an extra day, but the next morning I woke up to 1k plus messages.
From one group chat? Please, please, I’m an old person.
Everyone has that one teacher that changed their lives, and so do anime protagonists, except they are called sensei. Sometimes, they are there to push the characters to be better and other times. They help uptight students relax and enjoy life. Here are seven anime teachers we wish were real enough to teach us.
Master Roshi – Dragon Ball
If you get to train one of the most powerful anime heroes, of course, you will make the cut. Goku might have been super strong, but he owes it all to Master Roshi’s constant martial arts lessons. Most people his age can barely move, but he maintained his strength and speed. What makes him such a good teacher is his willingness to motivate and train his students, no matter how old or young.
Satoru Gojo – Jujutsu Kaisen
Satoru Gojo is the literal embodiment of the chaotic good trope. He uses unconventional methods to train his students; of course, he is super powerful. I especially love anyone willing to fight higher-ups for his student’s sake, which is why I think he makes such a great teacher. This man listens to no one but himself and is never wrong. I’d listen to any teacher that is confident in themself tbh.
The man/octopus has sensei in his name; how can we omit him? To date, he is still my favourite teacher of all time. He takes time to study each student and trains them according to their strengths. He is involved in their lives inside and outside the classroom and wants to see them be the best versions of themselves. He might have been training them to be assassins, specifically to kill him. But he gets a pass for being genuine and dedicated to ensuring his students grew up to be good people.
Dr. Franken Stein – Soul Eater
I love when a sensei is a good mix of crazy genius and powerful, which describes Dr Franken Stein. He might be a little sadistic and tire his students by constantly asking them if he can dissect them, but sometimes, red flags are green. If he isn’t teaching Soul and Maka to get along, he is busy protecting his students from enemies. He might be a bit mad, but only the best senseis are mad.
Arataka Reigen – Mob Psycho 100
It’s scarce that a student starts as more powerful than his sensei, but that is the dynamic of Reigen and Mob’s relationship. This man has no supernatural abilities as he claims, but if lying was a sport, he’s always come first. At first, Regin uses Mob to make money in his scam business of exorcising demons. Still, he eventually becomes just the sensei Mob needs. Mob wanted Reigen to train him to be more powerful, but Reigen taught him to be a better person. Through him, Mob learns to be more confident as you will be if you know someone will always listen to your problems and give you advice where necessary.
Hatake Kakashi – Naruto
It’s tough to choose one sensei from Naruto because all of them were great teachers, but today, let’s give Kakashi his flowers. Even after amassing so much power, Kakashi was the only reason Naruto and his team members had such a good moral compass. This man always ensured that their safety was more important than completing missions and taught them to value people’s lives. He made what could have been a stressful childhood training to be a ninja fun and was always there when they needed him.
Osamu Dazai – Bungo Stray Dogs
I know this might be an unconventional entry but hear me out. Dazai might have lost his will to live, but it comes in clutch whenever they face danger, and he dives in to save his students without thinking first. That’s the mark of a great teacher to me. He puts them first before himself, and that’s what makes him so great. When he’s not busy trying to unalive himself, Dazai’s always busy training and teaching his students to enhance their abilities and learn to work with others. That’s my problematic king, and I stand by him.
One thing all anime fans will agree on is that white-haired anime characters are usually the strongest, most extraordinary and hottest. If a character has white hair or goes through problems that turn his hair white, be ready for some well-deserved action.
Gojo Satoru – Jujutsu Kaisen
At first, he gives off lazy energy, but real anime fans know characters like him are usually super strong. With his eyepatch on, he’s the playful and annoying sensei to his students, but the moment the mask comes off power pass power. Gojo is an arrogant but highly-skilled sorcerer no one should cross.
To be honest, Kaneki was a loser until he had the “character development” that turned his hair white. He turned into a ghoul who needs to eat people to survive, but this man chooses to drink coffee instead to suppress his hunger, in his saviour era for real. Kaneki has that good-boy-gone-bad arch going for him, and I love it. His fight scenes are a pleasure to watch and watching him casually save the world like it’s another Tuesday never gets old.
Kakashi – Naruto
The internet lost its mind when we realised this man just casually reads smut for fun in public. But there’s more to him than being a whore. Kakashi motivates his students to be their best selves. Imagine being the student of a Hokage, teaching the Hokage, and then becoming a Hokage yourself. Being as strong as the main character, whose power is half demon, is just goated.
Killua – Hunter x Hunter
Don’t be deceived by his cuteness. Don’t even go near when he’s in assassin mode because that’ll be the end for you. Killua takes self-confidence to another level, but you’d do the same if you were undefeatable. He’s also a super great friend and is always amused for someone with an intensely tragic backstory.
Todoroki – My Hero Academia
To be fair, Todoroki isn’t purely white-haired, but he gets a pass because, if push comes to shove, he’d have pure white hair to erase the red that reminds him of his dad. He’s the epitome of calm and collected. His powers are dramatic but get the work down. His growth as a person is chef kiss, and he’s a safe space for fans with daddy issues.
Najenda – Akame Ga Kill
There’s no way anyone would watch Akame Ga Kill and not fall in love with Najenda. She starts as this super cool general whose hobby is killing people. But… mention one anime hero who hasn’t killed someone. Exactly. She’s also funny and has this super cool “inspector gadget” arm that gives her character sauce. What’s better than a strong white-haired character? A funny badass one, thank you.
Shougo Makishima – Psycho-pass
There’s no trope hotter than the white-haired, morally-grey character, which sums Shougo up completely. He’s always two steps ahead, and fear? What’s that, please? He kills people without a second thought and is such a sweet talker. You’d hear his voice in your head for days after watching Psycho-pass. But that’s a small price to pay to see him on screen, to be honest. That’s my sadistic, parseltongue king, and I stand by him.
The Duffer Brothers, who created and produced Stranger Things, are remaking Death Note, and I have a lot of thoughts. With Stranger Things popularity and good reviews, it’s safe to say they do justice to their projects but enough to recreate anime? I don’t think so. This is a live-action anime remake, and Death Note has had seven remakes, each with worse reviews than the last, since its release in 2006.
If the Duffer Brothers must put us through another torture of a remake, here’s everything we hate about live-action anime and what they can do different.
Death Note has a huge pop culture impact. Everyone, aka me, wanted to have a death note where they could write names of people they hated so they could die as the main character Light did. I even wanted to be friends with Ryuk; he was super chill. But, anime is a very tricky art form to turn into live-action. It’s popular enough that many Hollywood directors draw inspiration from it or remake it and, most of the time, ruin it for fans.
The thing about anime that makes it attractive to its fans are things that can never translate appropriately in real life, from fight scenes to breaks that introduce new scenes, or even weird characters Like Ryuk from Death Note, who looks like a sleep paralysis demon.
Live-action writers and producers either remake the anime with the budget of a Nollywood epic movie or deviate from the script entirely. I understand wanting to try something new, but does it have to become plotless? My G, please copy. Word for word, copy the anime to the best of your budget.
Don’t take something people love and ruin it. No one is asking you to make them speak Japanese, but don’t whitewash the characters or ruin iconic scenes with lousy acting. Trying to do too much while not doing enough will end in tears.
It’s not like it’s impossible to make great live-action anime movies. Your Lie in April, Alita: Battle Angel and Speed Racer were some good ones, and that’s a lot because even they had their problems. But, we don’t talk about Dragon Ball: Evolution, Netflix’s Death Note, and the Devilman movie.
Watching a lot of anime has given me enough insight on things you need to note if, for any reason, you have to make a live-action anime. I am Nigerian, and sharing advice no one asked for is our thing. Anyway, here are questions I think producers and writers should ask themselves before making life-action movies.
1. Can my budget recreate those incredible fight scenes?
2. How do I make sure the original voice is not lost?
3. Should I keep the intro and outro? The answer is yes, but if you don’t get the rights for it, don’t do the movie. Thanks.
4. How good am I at world-building?
5. Should this be a movie or a series?
If you are adopting from a series, you already have your answer. Trying to fit a twenty or more episode anime into one movie will end in disgrace.
Sitting down to ask yourself these questions might just give insight into the original creator’s thought process. Doing good work is difficult and expensive, but what’s the point of creating if everyone hates your work just cause you couldn’t be bothered?
I won’t say I’m excited about this remake because live-action anime always disappoints. Still, I’d like to see what the Duffer brothers will do differently. They have eight reference points to look at. Fingers crossed it won’t become one of those things we pretend didn’t happen.
Do you have a new friend or lover who’s into anime and mistakenly suggested you were into anime too? This article is for you. Before you get exposed, I’ll teach you basic terms that’ll make you sound knowledgeable and feel among. Let’s get into it.
Know your “big three”
That’s Naruto, Bleach and One Piece. Once you Google best characters, best fights and coolest scenes, you’re ready. Only a true anime fan would watch something as long as One Piece, and people are less likely to ask you questions. Up Monkey D. Dragon!
If they ask, “Who’s our favourite character of all time?” Take your time to answer, so it seems like all the best characters in your head are begging you to pick them. They’re only asking this question to see if you like the good or bad guys or if you have good taste in anime. Any character you choose, be ready to defend them with your life.
Choosing him is the best way to quiet a room, use with caution.
Pick a character’s death that hurt the most
Everyone has an anime character that died too soon, and now, so do you. Pick a character from any anime where people die a lot, e.g. characters from Naruto, and watch the character’s death scene. When you’re asked, just pretend it’s too painful to talk about, and that conversation will end.
Learn basic Japanese terms and phrases
Don’t say any Japanese phrases in real life. That’s for TikTok. But you should know some essential Japanese words like “Baka”, “Nandemonaiya”, “Gomen nasai” and terms like “shonen”, “shoujo”, and “isekai”, e.t.c.
When these come up in conversations — and they will — you won’t be confused.
Make sure you talk about wanting merch from your favourite anime
The best thing about casually talking about this, even though no one asked, is that it’s normal behaviour. Just keep droning on and on about wanting a shinobi headband until your anime friends leave you to your thoughts.
Choose a character you think is overpowered
No matter what you do, you can’t avoid this conversation. Casual conversations with anime watchers have a terrible way of turning into unavoidable arguments. I’m not saying you should say One-Punch Man or Ichigo, but everyone will most likely agree with you, or a fight will start.
Don’t you just love chaos?
Recommend anime to them
The final question they’ll ask is “ What are you watching right now” and you should be prepared. The more unpopular your recommendation is, the more impressed they’ll be. You can also just say that you’re watching filler episodes from an anime you’ve finished before and boom, you’re in the click. Be careful though, as you can’t keep up this pretence for long. You’ll most likely become a fan too. Good luck.
If you took our advice and watched Spy x Family, don’t you love Anya, Loid and Yor now? If you don’t, we don’t know how to help you oh. Spy x Family is funny, and as a Nigerian, I could connect with so many parts, so I had to write this.
Here are six of the most relatable moments in Spy x Family.
Parents forcing kids to get into a “prestigious” school
Did Anya have to get into the school for the sake of world peace? Yes, but what does that remind you of? Getting into that ridiculously overrated federal university just so your parents can boast only to spend eight instead of four years. Watching Spy x Family as a Nigerian will have you saying “been there” every two seconds.
These people are everywhere in anime. They’re doing campaigns instead of picking out caskets. And of course, they’re always the beginning of all the problems: stealing from citizens and living lavishly. At least Spy x Family has Loid to stop them.
Everyone forcing you to get married
Or the world would crash and burn. Sounds familiar?
Cows are everywhere
Art imitates life because why were cows pursuing the characters in Spy x Family?
Teachers being unnecessarily mean to children
After that entry interview, Anya definitely needs at least three therapists. And so do all of you reading this. Meanwhile, people that are mean to kids deserve the worst.
Policing arresting people for no reason
I was so triggered by the police arresting innocent citizens and torturing them. Spy x Family, I’m trying to laugh, please. .
As an anime fan, I admit that there are some anime dads I once wished would adopt me. For example, Jiraya technically isn’t a dad, but he counts, even if he motivates his protégés by turning into naked women, which is actually not okay.
In fact, there are a lot of anime dads who did weird shit that anime writers sold to us as normal. As a kind person, I decided to share their evil deeds with you in this article because why not? Shalom.
Endeavor (My Hero Academia)
You know how Nigerian parents motivate you to work hard, and don’t let you rest, then you start thinking it’s normal not to rest? That’s this man. All he cared about was training his son, Todorokibecause he was the only one of his four children to have both parents’ quirks. Endeavor neglected his other children and trained Todoroki tirelessly. I mean, was the training for a good cause? Yes. Did Todoroki learn to be a better hero and person? Yes. But that’s not the point. To be fair, if my name was Endeavor, I too would move mad sha.
It’s hard to say whether any character in Attack on Titan is good or bad because sometimes you have to make selfish decisions when your country is at war. Grisha trained his first son to be a spy and turned his second son into a flesh-eating monster to protect them. While the thought was sweet, why did he make Eren eat him just for plot development? Why would he traumatise him like that? Oh, and the best part? Turning Eren into a titan reduced his lifespan to 13 years. I present to you the father of the year.
Minato Namikaze (Naruto)
I wanted to cut him some slack at first because he died before Naruto was born, so he couldn’t have been that bad. But, Minato sealed the nine-tailed monster that killed him in his newborn baby, Naruto, without even thinking twice. The least he could have done was write Naruto a letter preparing the boy for the amount of hate the villagers would have towards him, but did he do that? No, Minato waited until Naruto turned 16 to meet him through Ninja magic. He got punched in their first meeting as he deserved. Minato is a good guy, but what was he thinking?
Shiro Fujimoto (Blue Exorcist)
This man was a paladin, a fancy name for a pastor specialising in exorcisms. This man saved the lives of Satan’s twin babies, Rin and Yukio, and adopted them, which was nice. But the least he could have done was tell Rin he had inherited the devil’s power. Instead, he told Yukio and trained that one to be a paladin to “protect” his demon brother. On top of all this, he still had the audacity to die with many unanswered questions. If I see this man? It’s on sight.
Jouichirou is a professional chef, the best chef in this anime world. He made cooking with his son Soma look so fun, teaching him life lessons on the side. It was cute until he woke up one day and abandoned Soma, and their small food kiosk, to supposedly make him self-reliant! Then, he sent a letter asking Soma to apply to the chef school he finished from without preparing the poor boy for how shitty those rich kids can be. He’s just lucky he fathered an “aspire to perspire” son who thinks he can win anything with friendship on his side. If not? Poison straight.
Kuniharu Saiki (The Disastrous Life Of Saiki)
This man is probably one of the funniest anime dads. He was also super sensitive to his kid’s needs and loved his wife. But did he make his psychic son fix all his problems, including the work and marriage-related ones? Yes, and that’s totally not normal. I need this man to find shame and borrow it from wherever he found it.
Shou Tucker (Fullmetal Alchemist)
If ththere’sne thing the anime community agrees on itit’shat this guy is the worst dad in the history of dads. At first, they made him seem like this nice guy who loved his daughter and dog and was just trying to make it in the world of science magic (aka alchemy). His alchemy career wasn’t working out, so the state took his license away. This man of sane mind now decided that the best thing to do was to use alchemy to merge his daughter, Nina, with their pet dog, turning them into a chimera. After doing this, he still tried to gaslight the creature, talmbout how no one understands him. Uncle, even satan will not understand you. Rest.
I was scrolling through a very legal anime site one Saturday, looking for what to watch and saw Spy x Family. The description was ridiculous: “The story follows Loid, a spy who has to “build a family” to execute a mission. He adopts a little girl, Anya, who, unknown to him, is a telepath, and Yor, the woman that agrees to marry him, is a skilled assassin.”
It was chaotic but also funny as fuck, and here’s why you should let them become a big part of your weekend for the next few months.
It’s funny
The whole charm of Spy X Family is watching Loid and Yor interact with each other, completely unaware of their secret identities. Anya, of course, is the little weirdo that knows all their secrets but is there for the laughs and giggles. Please, close your doors before watching sha. Your laughter will have people worried.
Of course, there’s a little romance between Loid and Yor, but that’s not what I’m talking about. It’s the love Loid, Yor, and Anya develop for each other that makes the show. One time Loid rented a castle to recreate an episode of Anya’s favourite show, and Yor used her assassin fighting skills to beat up her daughter’s bully. I just had to root for them.
Anya
If not for anything, watch it for Anya; saint of all children, lover of peanuts, spy movies, fangirl, and best in foolish jokes. Since Anya can read minds, when Yor and Loid are busy lying to each other, she speaks the audience’s mind when she’s just there like, wow, these guys lie a lot, but what’s my own?
Kids are the ghetto, but she makes them seem great.
The series is a bad bitch that does it all
Spy X Family transcends genre. If you want action, Yor and Loid will give that to you in abundance. If you want to laugh your head off, Anya exists. Don’t forget the romance between Yor and Loid. Honestly, which anime series is out there doing it like them?
The very sexy age-appropriate main character
This is very important. Yor and Loid are hot as fuck and age-appropriate to thirst after. If you’re into thirsting after animated characters — not us, though, y’all be easy — prepare to be obsessed with both of them. Sorry, not sorry.
If they ask me to jump, I’ll ask how high.
It’s healing
As we are all currently in the business of healing our inner children, if you watch Spy x Family, you’ll be 50 per cent close to your goal. Sources have even said that it cures depression. It’s me. I am “Sources”.
Love, Death & Robots is an anthology series on Netflix with a unique blend of sci-fi, horror, and comedy. Some episodes are animated, while others lean into a realistic or CGI art style. The best part of Love, Death & Robots is not knowing what to expect next with each episode, and they never disappoint.
Love, Death & Robots: Volume 3 slaps from the first episode. It’s a series of animated shorts aimed at adults, so there’s an ungodly amount of blood, gore, and adult themes. I ranked all nine episodes in this article, from my least favourite to my favourite.
“Mason’s Rats”
This episode follows a Scottish farmer who purchases a small military-grade army of robots to fight off an army of rats that have infested his barn. The fact that this episode ends with the rats and the farmer calling a truce and sharing a drink made by the rats did not sit well with the Nigerian in me. Sentient or not, rats are disgusting. It’s an excellent episode. I just don’t support rats as living things.
This episode would have been my least favourite if “Mason’s Rats” had featured any other animal but rats. Kill Team Kill tells the story of a military squad who goes up against a genetically modified grizzly bear. The guys in the unit spend all their time making penis jokes, swearing at each other, and being in a non-stop blood bath. It’s short but super chaotic. The good thing is that they die quickly enough for you to move on. If you like a weird mix of action and comedy, this is for you.,
“Swarm”
Swarm tells the story of two opportunistic scientists trying to learn the secrets of an alien hive to improve humanity. The whole episode features humans doing what they do best: exploiting and attempting to colonise and builds up to an underwhelming sex scene. On a deeper level, there’s the fundamental question of whether the aliens or the humans are being exploited. That question is never answered, though, and the story ends unresolved—shoutout to it for at least being the only episode to touch on the theme of love.
“Night of the Mini Dead”
In this episode, two foolish humans decide to have sex in a cemetery, triggering a series of unfortunate events that wipes out humanity via a zombie apocalypse. The gag of the episode is the stop motion animation method and the camera angle that makes the humans look like ants with squeaky voices. Anyway, I blame konji for all of this.
“Three Robots: Exit Strategies”
Our favourite robot trio from volume one returns in this episode and continues their journey through the ruins of a post-apocalyptic Earth. They went to the last bunker for rich people, specifically an oil rig for millionaires and tech-bros. They found out that it was where the first robot uprising began because those guys had no survival skills and relied heavily on machines—the shade. The three of them criticised humans back and forth and made several points, but the real gag was the end, where the iconic line “Who were you expecting, Elon Musk?” was said after they showed us who finally made it to Mars.
Similar to Kill Team Kill (a military squad goes on a mission to take out some terrorists in Afghanistan and ends up trying to take out a monster. A lot of the plot would not exist if they’d seen the tomb, said “fuck no”, and gone home, but what’s the fun in that? The animation style is so realistic that when the sole survivor cut off her ears and gouged her eyes at the end, I nearly fainted. This episode is just the right amount of action and horror, so if you like movies like Aliens vs Predator, you’ll enjoy this one.
“Bad Travelling”
In Bad Travelling, a sentient crab boards a ship containing a group of shark hunters and begins killing some of the crew. It forces the captain to take it to an island so it can kill more innocent people. The captain is torn between saving the rest of his crew and saving the people’s lives on the island. This episode will have you at the edge of your seat, and you’ll have to remember to breathe. It’s that good.
“The Very Pulse of the Machine”
This episode is the ultimate trip and will make you question everything about existence. When it ends, you’ll wonder if you were high the entire time. An astronaut is stranded on one of Jupiter’s moons and has to drag the corpse of her comrade to safety. Along the way, She taps into the planet’s consciousness after taking drugs that make her hallucinate, and it claims to be a sort of machine. She starts to hear her dead companions talking to her, and we’re unsure if she’s hallucinating or if the moon is a machine talking to her. She sha made near-death feel beautiful right up to the ending. The colour choice and music were vital in making this entire episode beautiful.
“Jibaro”
This twisted episode left chills down my spine. Not a word was uttered between the two characters, but somehow that made it heavier. “Jibaro” follows a deaf knight whose entire battalion is killed by a siren-like creature covered in gold and jewels. She becomes obsessed with this man maybe because her cries have no effect on him, and at her most vulnerable, this man rips up all the gold and jewels from her body in the most horrific manner. Lowkey, it makes you feel like you’re having an anxiety attack, and the music sure doesn’t help, but that tension and the almost life-like animation stylish make it brilliant. It’s both disturbing and mesmerising with fantastic storytelling.
Nigerians are the most expressive people in the world; don’t ask us how we know, but if you’ve never watched anime with a group of Nigerians, you’re missing out on a good time.
Here are seven reasons why watching anime with Nigerians is hilarious.
Every genre becomes comedy
The anime character will slice someone’s head, and one silly person will be like, “See as dem slice my guy head like goat.” it makes no sense, but everyone will burst into laughter. If you’ve been putting off watching a particular anime because it’s too scary, just invite a bunch of Nigerians to watch with you and be ready to laugh through the horror.
If a character has a big head, someone will suddenly remember to mention that it looks like their secondary school principal. Another person will tap the closest person to them and say, “No be your mama, be that?” Nigerians are rude.
The commentary is comedy gold
Nigerians can’t watch something and keep their thoughts and opinions to themselves, and anime will always give you a lot to talk about. If the hero is losing a fight, they’ll start encouraging them as if the hero can hear them. If the character is about to make stupid decisions, the insults they will receive will make you laugh till you fall sick.
Nigerians are always hyped up
Be ready to forget what happened in some episodes, because if the hero wins a big fight, people will start shouting or singing. The best thing you can do is to pause that anime and enjoy that hilarious moment where your friends are super-hyped for no reason. You don’t want to have to keep rewinding.
They are overdramatic as hell
If a side character dies, everyone will become solemn because one yeye person will now start saying shit like, “And he probably had a wife and kids at home oh! Chai, his family will be looking for him,” meanwhile, the character could be a 14-year-old orphan. Next thing you know, they’ll start trading their most painful anime character deaths because Nigerians love a good Sufferhead Olympics.
The moment they show a food scene, it’s over
Nigerians are competitive, especially when they shouldn’t be. The main character will be eating fancy-looking ramen with his friends, and someone will just be like, “Omo, I can make this thing na. Is it not noodles and egg with vegetables?” Then they’ll start talking about all the ways they make their noodles. Next thing you know, someone is cooking it to prove a point.
They can vex ehn
One minute you’ve paused your anime to talk about the mad fight scene you guys just watched, and the next moment somebody is insulting your dad because you called a character weak, it’s all jokes, though, and while it can be annoying at that moment, when you think back at the memory you’d surely laugh