1. Your face, that moment your car or bus breaks down in the middle of the bridge.
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I’m dead.
2. When it’s a bus so you know at least you’re not going to die alone.
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We are all in this together.
3. How the other passengers move when a car actually stops:
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You people should chill small.
4. When you get down and discover how much the bridge actually shakes.
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How is this thing still standing?
5. When your mind starts doing ‘1000 ways to die’ because you’re alone.
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Baba God, pick up.
6. You, realizing how many steal-able things you actually own.
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Why do I have so much stuff?
7. When you start calling your friends to come out and pick you.
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Friendship no reach that one.
8. How Lagosians look at you when you try to stop them for help:
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Keep dreaming.
9. How they actually see you once it’s after 7pm:
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You are automatically an armed robber. Don’t argue.
10. You, remembering all the stranded people you never stopped for.
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Is this karma?
11. When you look at the water and start remembering all the mami water gist you’ve ever heard.
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This can’t be how I die.
12. You, calculating how many miles you would have to run to get off the bridge.
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Let me just sit here and die, abeg.
13. When a suspicious looking car starts slowing down beside you.
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Hay God!
14. When it’s actually a good Samaritan that is stopping to help you.
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YES LORD!