1. How your mother reacts to them:
She can already tell this one is good for nothing!
2. How your fake friends respond when you say hello:
Never happy to see you!
3. But when they need something from you they’re like:
“HIIIIIIIIII I’ve really missed you!”
4. When something amazing happens to you, on the inside they’re like:
Why must this one win?
5. But they pretend to be happy for you like:
“I just want you to know how proud I am of you.”
YIMU
6. When you talk about something you’re trying to achieve, they’re like:
“Ummm that doesn’t really sound like it’s possible.”
7. And then when you achieve it they’re like:
“How did you do it? Hmmm really?”
8. If your life was a nollywood movie they would be played by:
Always hoping for your downfall!
9. Whenever there is any drama involving you, they’re in the middle of it like:
“Ah let me even gist you people very well!”
10. How they take note of everything going on in your life:
Monitoring spirits!
11. Their version of sympathy:
Pointing and laughing and doing “I told you so!”.
12. When you finally see them for what they are, you’re like:
“AH! All this time?”
13. You flourishing regardless:
Shame to fake friends!
