14 “Dear Oloni” Tweets That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

Dami Olonisakin (aka Oloni) is an award-winning sex and relationship blogger.

The ‘Ask Oloni‘ segment on her blog is especially awesome, but some questions that get sent in are pretty ridiculous.

So, trust Nigerian Twitter to brilliantly parody it.

Here are 14 fake questions that are just a bit more ridiculous than the actual questions she gets:

1. This tweeter that was de-wigged.

https://twitter.com/Aisha_Ayy/status/732736755229728768

2. This tweeter that wants to cheat.

https://twitter.com/talkmarcus/status/732950034820550661

3. This tweeter’s uncomplicated request.

Dear @Oloni
Iv been begging my girlfriend to light up candles and cook akara for 4 months now and she still won't.
What should I do??

— Leks ✈️ (@Olalekan_Baddo) May 4, 2016

4. This tweeter’s valid point.

https://twitter.com/ThePhidelia_/status/715099788233060352

5. This tweeter that is looking for her next move.

Dear Oloni/Joro

The last time my man slapped me I ran mad for 3 days. I’m back to my senses now. He loves me. What should I do? -__- — Abike (@Jollz) March 9, 2016

6. This tweeter that wants to keep it real for her Instagram fans.

Dear Oloni, my wedding photos got 1,000 likes on Instagram but two years into the marriage my husband has had 12 girlfriends what do I do?

— Kelechi (@kelechnekoff) April 23, 2016

7. This tweeter’s cheating worries.

“Hi Oloni, I’ve been with my boyfriend for 4 years but recently he’s been secretive. I think he’s cheating on me, should I tell his wife?”

— Storm (@ShakiraWrites) February 25, 2016

8. This tweeter asking all the right questions.

Dear Oloni, we are in love but he hates Amala, after I have killed him where can I hide the body? Please help.

— The Goddess ✨ (@Brendalishus) April 18, 2016

9. This tweeter that just wants to be with the love of her life.

https://twitter.com/rzadsh/status/715505636457496576

10. This tweeter that wants to give her man the benefit of the doubt.

Dear Oloni,
I met my boyfriend naked in bed with another girl, he's a good man, I'm not sure he's cheating. What should I do?

— Alexandria (@alexnnamaka) March 31, 2016

11. This tweeter looking for workout advice.

https://twitter.com/Slauts1/status/720394817814077440

12. This tweeter that is ‘looking’ on the bright side.

13. This tweeter’s honest question.

Dear oloni I get jealous watching my barber trims next mans hair, is it normal?

— lifeofyags (@GyaldemNFT) March 31, 2016

14. This tweeter speaking the truth.

All jokes aside though, go check out her fantastic blog right here.