1. When your co-workers ask for your holiday plans.
Gats pray.
2. When your friend calls you to come and hang out.
This one is not serious.
3. What everyone else is eating during Sallah vs. What you are eating:
The struggle.
4. You, during the public holiday.
No money, no turn up.
5. When you want to leave your house but your account balance tells you:
Let me respect myself.
6. You, waiting for one of your Muslim friends to invite you over for chow.
Epp me, please.
7. When someone asks you “anything for boys?”
You cannot see me looking hungry.
8. You, waiting for any kind of credit alert like:
Baba God, do it for your child.
9. When you see people turning up on social media.
Na wa oh!
10. You, when people start making plans around you.
Not today, Satan.
11. When someone tells you “do Sallah for us.”
Better leave me.
12. When someone offers to come and take you out instead.
Now you’re talking.
13. How you eat when someone else is paying:
Can’t carry last.
