1. When you are trying to sleep but the porter has 1000 announcements at 6 AM

Can you please not?
2. You finally dress in your best outfit and KDS says it’s not compliant

Lord Jesus Christ, why do you people exist?
3. When you are late for your 7 AM and there is no keke anywhere

So this is how life is.
4. When you have to wake up super early for Spirikoko

Is it by force to pray?
5. The struggle to get an exeat during spiritual week

My grandmother’s grandson died so we are doing the burial this weekend.
6. When it is school fees season

Let us make this money!!!
7. When you’re trying to ‘dorcas’ and KDS is being extra

Someone can’t walk on the road in peace again?
8. When you see your lecturer for the semester is renowned for giving carry overs and 49’s

Why me?
9. When you have to do three GEDS in one semester

All these hours of trying to stay awake in class.
10. When it is time for mid semester after spiritual week

Ahan already? They don’t use to play with you guys?
11. Heading to ‘Caf’ for special sabbath lunch

This food will not pass me by.
12. When there are six parties in Lagos and everybody is going to be there

We must all show face there by all means.
13. Walking in and out of your hall when you’ve settled the hall administrator for the semester

Y’all cant tell me nothing
14. When they start smoking on your block

Its not me you people will put in trouble.
15. When they say chapel seminar will determine if you graduate or not

Don’t go and dull yourself.
16. When you see someone with 06/ matric number in your 11/ class

AH CHAIRMAN!
17. Church services when it is exam period

Please they are praying for exam success.
18. When the lecturer says “next class is for AOC”

MVP!
19. When your exam is in WRA or SCT and there are only 20 people in the whole hall

Its over.
20. And you have to battle with CCTV
21. Checking your results on UMIS after a semester of Quilox and Weekend trips
22. And then when you finally graduate after all the challenges