1. When you turn 13 and can now officially leave children’s church.
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We move!!
2. How you look at your 12 year old friends still in children’s church.
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Look at them. So young and naive. Unlike us; big boys and girls that know about the world.
3. You looking for a clique to join in teens church.
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I need a crew oh!
4. When you realise the snacks are not as nice as children’s church.
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Are these ones serious?
5. When you find out there is still memory verse and homework.
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I did not grow for this!
6. When you realise this is just a time wasting exercise till you get to “adult church”.
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Okay so we are just here to waste 4 years of Sundays abi?
7. When your Sunday school teachers say you’ll be talking about sex and relationships next week.
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Interesting!
8. When next week comes and they spend 2 hours saying “don’t have sex”/ “don’t near yourselves” in 500 different ways.
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So that is all you people have to say?
9. When they try to stylishly use teenagers to teach some of the Sunday school classes.
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Okay so we are now assistant teachers abi? Are we corpers?
10. When you are dancing to Kirk Franklin’s “stomp” again for the 700th time.
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Not again abeg!
11. When one of your oversabi pastors says you have to delete all your “worldly” music.
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So it’s only Chioma Jesus and Ron Kenoly we should be jamming abi?
12. When they allow teenagers lead adult church and someone suggests you preach.
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You want the congregation to never come back abi?
13. When your parents try to add mouth in what you are wearing to church.
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What do you people know about teenagers fashions please?
14. When your sme-sme friends are now forming Mummy and Daddy G-O in teens church.
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You people are now forming holier than thou abi?
15. When you are now too old for teen church but you don’t want to go to adult church!
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NOOOOOOOOOO!