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But we need more. We need more stories and pictures of beautiful men and women of the force, who are dedicated to doing their jobs.
Do you know any? Please send them in!
Send all info to lola@zikokomag.com. Make sure to attach images, along with their names and information (as well as social media handles).
We can’t wait to receive them!
When you hear someone is an addict, what comes to your mind?
*He must be doped on drugs — all the time*
*She can’t do without getting high*
*He’s broke because he spends all his money drinking*
Most of us think it’s the drugs that are the real cause of the addiction– which is true, to some extent.
But what if we told you that what you thought you knew about addiction is wrong?
Yes everything.
Our ideas about addiction came about from a series of experiment carried out in the early 20th century.
In the experiment you get a rat and you put it in a cage, and you give it two water bottles: one is just water, and the other is water laced with either heroin or cocaine.If you do that, the rat will almost always prefer the drug waterand almost always kill itself quite quickly.
But experiments in the 1970s by famed professor of psychology Bruce Alexander reveal that more times than not, the real culprit in addiction is a lack of human connection.
Yes, simple human connection!
This powerful video explains this curious relationship.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ao8L-0nSYzg
Doesn’t this make you revaluate how you see drug addicts, what can be done and what we can do to help?
As a Nigerian twenty-something, I must confess that being an adult is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
I’m sure you feel the same too. No one knows our struggle. So let’s tell them:
1. When you decide to move out of your parent’s house and you realize how expensive rent is.
Please don’t let me go. One more year, please.
2. When you cannot find an affordable place to rent that’s not a shithole.
God, what is this place?!
3. When you try to convince potential employers that you’re qualified for a job.
Because your degree isn’t even enough.
4. When you get the job and realize that school did NOT prepare you for this.
What is this?
5. When your boss actually expects you to work from 9 to 5.
No, it’s not a joke.
6. When you could no longer fake a sick day for being tired, like you used to in school.
So you start waiting for the public holidays…
7. When you realize that PHCN, internet and water bills are not part of the rent.
Wait, what? WHAT?!
8. Then this is you everytime you have to pay the bills.
Is it me that spent all this? How much light and water did I use?
9. When you can no longer rely on someone else to cook for you – or do the dishes.
Growing up is a scam. I wasn’t ready.
10. When you’ve spent all of your salary but it’s just the first week of the month.
*cries in poverty*
11. When you check your bank balance after one week of avoiding it.
Oh god!
12. When you realize how many random things you have to pay for as an adult.
Wazzaldis?
13. When you realised you need to be saving a portion of your money for the ‘future’.
Is the future not far?
14. When your life achievements aren’t exactly how you pictured them back in school.
By now, I should’ve been worth 5 million dollars.
15. When people assume you can have grown up conversations just because you’re an adult now.
‘Scuse me, I have an inner child.
16. When someone tells you that they envy the life you’ve built.
Please why are you mocking me?
17. When you cannot go out with friends because you have to spend the weekends cleaning the house and doing laundry.
If not you have to buy new clothes…and no money.
18. When your life practically explodes and you have to call your parents for help.
Mummy, please pick up.
19. But they’re Nigerian, so this is most likely their reaction.
Mom, stop laughing. It’s not funny.
20. When people around you start getting married and having babies at a creepily fast rate.
Will everybody just calm down?!
21. When people start asking, “When are you going to settle down?”
I literally just grew up.
22. When you finally realize that being an adult is overrated.
It’s all a huge scam. DON’T DO IT!
See. I want a break from adulting. Just 6 months. Is that too much to ask?
Zikoko fam! As NYSC orientation camp started yesterday, it’s time to share your (not-so) fond memories from your NYSC year 😀 . What are your best (or worst) memories from NYSC?
So today is the day of reckoning for Twitter as the widely-loved social network has decided to replace the ‘favourite’ button …. with a ‘like’ button… in the shape of a heart.
For almost 10 years, Twitter has featured a favourite button in the shape of a yellow star but decided the yellow star just isn’t good enough anymore.
And Nigerians are..
flabbergasted,
confused,
outraged,
annoyed,
worried,
fearful
of what this ‘like’ button will unleash on their online lives.
Reactions range from this.
To this.
To this.
And even this.
A good question to ask is WHY has Twitter done such a thing?
Twitter’s product manager Akarshan Kuma said, “We want to make Twitter easier and more rewarding to use, and we know that at times the star could be confusing, especially to newcomers. You might like a lot of things, but not everything can be your favorite.”
Kumar further explained that the heart was chosen for its broad appeal and meaning across cultures:
“The heart, in contrast, is a universal symbol that resonates across languages, cultures and time zones. You’ve embraced hearts in a big way on Periscope, and we’re delighted to bring them to Twitter and Vine, making them the common language for our global community.”
But some have accused Twitter of copying Facebook which allows users to “like” photos, comments and posts.
[zkk_poll post=9117 poll=content_block_standard_format_13]
From today, hearts will appear on Twitter for iOS and Android, twitter.com, TweetDeck, Twitter for Windows 10 and on Tweets across the internet.
So enjoy! ?
Oyinbo wonders will never end. Bullying happens to not just the students, but the teachers as well.
A substitute teacher at a high school in Chicago, U.S of A was physically abused by her students. AND one of them even recorded it on camera.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a71IUZinSrM
The boy pelts the teacher with food and at a point, almost throws a chair at her.
The nerve of the girl with the camera is just incredible. She even asks the teacher “How do you feel about this situation?” And she could be heard laughing in the background.
We have to say, this teacher is just a nice person. Either that or she just doesn’t like confrontation.
But then, we wonder what she could have done in a country where not sparing the rod is child abuse.
She should have at least called security. But we imagine the mischief makers would say that she was lying.
But what would have happened if this actually occurred in a Nigerian school?
Those students will first of all be punished by their teacher.
You think you can try rubbish and get away with it?
Then catered off to the headmaster’s office for even more punishment.
They’ll be publicly disgraced at the school assembly the next day.
Walk of shame plus public lashing.
Then suspended for about three weeks to a month.
Even more punishment awaits them when they get home.
It’s basically a life of punishments in the foreseeable future.
If they’ve been suspended before, it’s automatic expulsion. No questions asked.
Their parents will never let them forget it for as long as they live.
“You better not go to that boy’s house. He’s the reason why you got suspended.”
“You have not being obeying the commandments, that’s why you go suspended.”
[zkk_poll post=8986 poll=content_block_standard_format_10]
Celebricity.com reports that Karen Rainford , the mother of six who was beheaded in Mountain View, California was killed by husband. Friends report that Mr Rainford has recently used DNA testing to discover that none of their 6 children were his. Karen reportedly used to come to his place of employment and embarrass him for child support money, meanwhile possibly know that the kids weren’t his all along.
We have asked Judge Don Jazzy to handle the case. He has questions:
1. Why did Karen keep having children? Hadn’t she heard of contraception?
2. What made Mr Rainford get suspicious at number 6? Why not after the 3rd kid?
3. You mean he did naming ceremony and child dedication for 6 children that weren’t his?
4. Ok. Why couldn’t he just accept those children? Can’t he see Baba Segi?
5. Can’t you see the hand of God in this matter? Is it easy to have 6 children?
6. Can you imagine how many times Karen had to cheat to result in having 6 children?
7. Did Karen have the children from 6 different men? From one other man? Does she know?
8. Now that you’ve read this, why aren’t you sharing to your friends?
Nigerian roads are not for the weak, or those with bad manoeuvring skills!
From potholes, to floods, to incomplete roads, Nigerians have experienced it all!
1. The one that will sink your car.
2. The one that split like the Red Sea.
3. The one formerly known as Enugu-Onitsha Expressway..Rest in pieces.
4. The one that requires intense manoeuvring skills.
5. The one that shows the REAL cause of Lagos traffic.
6. The one that is a comedian.
So I should fly over abi? Or carry my car on my head? You must be unserious.
7. The OTHER cause of traffic in Lagos.
8. The one that just makes no sense.
9. The one that turned into a swimming pool.
10. The one that proves Nigerians are stunt drivers.
11. The one that requires no explanation. See for yourself.
Hopefully, one day ALL Nigerian roads will look like this.
And mahn are we thirsty!!!
This police officer is a sight for sore eyes.
Fine boy. No pimples. Yes dimples.
Where has he been all our life? How come we’re just hearing about him? His name is Aleey Giwa (in case you want to do a Google search) and he’s the Deputy PRO of Lagos State Police Command.
See posing.
He’s a modern guy.
Take a look at the MacBook. Everybody knows that those with MacBook have good taste in life.
The charm. The charisma. *Swoon*
Dare we say he can frisk us any time. Yes please.
And if you’re thirsty (we know you are), go follow his Twitter account @Aleeygiwa.
[zkk_poll post=8825 poll=content_block_standard_format_6]
Please send the images to lola@zikokomag.com.
Pranking a Nigerian parent is a risky move which may end in this being thrown at your head…
or this…
or a beating with one of these…
But there is one Nigerian boy who has managed to survive all of these.
Meet ComedyShortsGamer a.k.a Deji. He loves to prank his mum and dad for the pleasure of his millions of followers who can’t get enough of their hilarious Nigerian parent-style reactions.
Watch these videos to learn how, just like Deji, you too can prank your Nigerian mother and father and live to tell the tale.
1. Tell your Nigerian mother you got a tattoo… of a ‘demonic creature’.
2. Tell your Nigerian mother you want to ‘snap a picture’ but make a video of her just posing instead.
3. Tell your Nigerian father that everything he’s worked hard to build has been burnt in a fire.
His father’s acting is oscar-worthy sha!
4. Slap your Nigerian mother! Yes you read that correctly. SLAP her with whipped cream.
Disclaimer: we accept no liability for the ifoti you might receive.
5. Tell your Nigerian mother you ‘impregnated’ a girl.. in her house.
Ok so maybe we all can’t get away with this level of pranking with our Nigeria parents like Deji can.
So tell us..
[zkk_poll post=8748 poll=content_block_standard_format_16]
In Nigeria, if you’re single and over 30, it’s a struggle. Even more so if you happen to live in Lagos. Couples everywhere you go, friends and family wondering why you’re still single and trying to set you up with eligible bachelors they know. Sometimes you begin to think that being the second wife or side chick isn’t a bad idea.
But we’re here to tell you that there’s hope. Being single lady in your 30s isn’t the end of the world and we’ll show you how.
This also applies to ladies who are under 30, but feel the pressure from the society to get married.
We gotchu boo.
1. First of all, be happy to be single.
Life’s too short. Don’t spend time wallowing in self-pity. You might not be thrilled to be single, but be determined to be happy.
2. Do what makes you happy.
Why should you worry about the opinion of others, when in the end only yours matter?
3. Enjoy your single state.
As much as much as you might be tired of being single to stupor, there are people in relationships or married couple that wish they were single.
Enjoy your singularity. Be comfortable with it. Pick up projects and immerse yourself in it, experience new things, work on your hobbies.
You probably have things you plan to do when you’re in a relationship. (e.g travel); what stops you from doing it now?
Work to get to a point where you’re happy to be single.
4. Go out more.
Are you a homebody? Do you prefer to stay out indoors, but want to make new friends, expand your network? Then that will be next to impossible.
If you’re tired of being single and don’t want to be, you best get up, clean up and get out there. Unless you’d rather meet people online.
5. Have a healthy work-life balance.
If you dedicate your life and time to your work, and have no social life, you might regret it later. You can’t be jobless either. So learn how to separate business from pleasure.
Work hard and play equally as hard.
6. Take any advice you get with a pinch of salt.
Get ready to be told what you can or can’t do as you get older. Also, be careful of who you ask for advice on your life issues. Not every advice is good advice.
7. Imagine a worst-case scenario.
As Nigerians, we can be overtly religious. But when you’ve been single long enough, it’s time to be realistic. Imagine if you never got married and what you’d do. If you can’t think of anything, start making plans.
Until you’re happy with yourself, you can’t be happy even when you get to be in a relationship. You’d look to the other person to make you happy.
Excerpts and inspiration taken from How to be Single in Your 30s in Lagos by Lape Soetan.
Lape Soetan has a Bachelor’s degree from the University of Ibadan and an MBA from the University of Leicester, UK. She is a communications professional with over 10 years of experience and is the creator of the award-nominated lifestyle blog, www.lapesoetan.com ‘How to be a single woman in your 30s in Lagos’ is her first book. To buy the book VISIT HERE.
Connect with Lape on Twitter, Instagram and Google+.
Remember how difficult it was to break old Nokia phones? Well, we have a new testament to their strength today.
Facebook user Ella Delarose posted 3 pictures to show how an old Nokia phone deflected a stray bullet! Sounds insane? Yeah, that’s what we thought too.
So we dug into the archives to find other examples of Nokia’s awesomeness…
The One About Nokias Against the Wall.
Nokias Vs Train.
Nokia vs Liquid Nitrogen.
Of course today, we can’t find any of these kinds of phones again. So let’s have a moment of silence for the awesome ancient Nokia phones.
The BVN registration deadline has passed. As usual, Nigerians have ended up with tales of woe from all angles “It’s not our fault, it’s the situation in the country.”
Let’s tell you how you got to this position…
1. You first heard about BVN…
Everyday, everyday, register for something.
2. When you knew you were broke and wondered what the point of BVN was.
Please what other transaction can I do from here? What kind of life is this please?
3. When that teller asked you “Have you done your BVN?”
But if you mind your business, will you die?
4. Then you went to the bank to beat the first deadline…
As per LastMinute dotcom. Wait, is the whole of Nigeria here? I can’t deal abeg.
5. Before they postponed it.
Of course they did… as per Naija!
6. So you went back to ignoring your bank.
*Marked as spam*
7. Until the guy who owed you money came to pay you back.
Praise Da Living Jesus!
8. And you had to rush to do your BVN.
I’m next on the queue please! My friend, answer me now!
9. But somehow, your account still got deactivated.
Chei! I have no luck.
But don’t worry, you’ll enter another queue, sort yourself out and be alright.
Last week, Nigeria was shocked with a disturbing report that secondary school students in Kano had been raped by some unknown men.
How could this happen? Who let it happen? We have so many questions about everything but these are the biggest ones….
1. Why does the Nigerian press seem to struggle with the word “rape in this case?
We’ve read “sodomy” a few times but apart from Premium Times, has anyone used the word “rape” to describe what happened to the boys?
2. Is it inconceivable that victims were raped by senior students?
Why are the authorities insisting that the rapists came from outside the school?
3. Are the students getting medical attention?
Premium Times reports that the school is preventing the victims from receiving care outside the school.
4. Is this an isolated incident or an epidemic?
Has this happened before in this school? And are students being raped in secondary schools across Nigeria?
5. Will the perpetrators be caught and prosecuted?
Our history in this department is not very great. Especially since the proprietor of the school reportedly denies the incident.
6. If your child, sibling or relative were a student of that school, what would you do?
KAMOKINI is an African swimwear & accessories brand dedicated to creating fashionable items that are not only aesthetically pleasing but also flattering to the wide range of African body types.
The swimwear are made of durable materials that cover problematic areas. They come in a variety of colours and bigger cups for bustier girls.
Kambili Ngozi Ofili-Okonkwo is the creator of the brand.
She began creating swimwear for herself due to her longing for swimsuits that reflected her style and reservations about body exposure simultaneously. The opportunity to turn it into a brand came when there was a high demand for her swimwear.
KAMOKINI means “child of Kambili & Ofili”.
KAMOKINI was formed from the acronym of the words “Kambili” (KAM) and “Ofili” (O), which her mother and father’s names respectively. The KINI comes from biKINI, monoKINI, tanKINI and also represents “pikin”, which means “child” in Nigerian pidgin English.
Prior to her entrepreneurial pursuit, Kambili had a career in Oil and Gas and currently has a consultancy job in addition to running KAMOKINI.
She worked as a Procurement Expeditor in Total Nigeria. Prior to that, she worked as a New Product Development Project Manager for Heinz Continental Europe in the Netherlands.
In addition to working on KAMOKINI, she works as a Business Consultant for Ethnic Heritage Centre.
Kambili obtained a BSc. and MSc. degree in Materials Science & Engineering from Imperial College and another MSc degree in Supply Chain & Logistics Management from Cranfield University, Milton Keynes.
Kambili faced challenges when she started out, but was able to find ways to deal with them.
From customs clearance, to deciding when to quit her day job, to deciding what styles to create for African woman. Nevertheless, KAMOKINI has established over 15 distribution channels across Africa and the US, been spotted on celebrities such as Seyi Shay, Toke Makinwa and Victoria Kimani, as well as a feature in Davido’s music video “Owo-ni-koko”.
Over 300 units have been sold and the brand has a following of over 2000+ people on social media.
KAMOKINI’s target in the next five years is to be a household name for all sun-seekers on the African continent and provide not only a wide range of swimsuits that will cater to all body types, but the accessories and equipment that will ensure time in the sun and by the waterside is enjoyable and well spent.
KAMOKINI will love to see Toolzo, Trayciee and YOU in their swimwear (no matter what your shape is).
This post was adapted from an interview with KAMOKINI’s founder, Kambili Ngozi Ofili-Okonkwo.
Meet Ojo Obaniyi, a 40-year old man from Ibadan, Nigeria.
Ojo decided to customise his Volkswagen pick-up truck..using hand-woven raffia fibres.
As a weaver with over 20 years experience, Ojo has created chairs, baskets, mats and other items, but decided to do something more unexpected.
Ojo explained, “I wanted to prove a point that it is not only the educated elite that can make positive changes in society.”
He added, “We, the artisans also have talents to effect a change and make a positive impact in the society. That is why I decided that I too must do something that will make people recognize me and know me across the whole world and by extension prove to the world that Africans and indeed the entire black race have very talented people.”
Ojo has once again shown that Nigerians are gifted in more ways than one! And more importantly, creativity does not decrease with age.
Ojo Obaniyi, the number you should definitely call for unique premium weaving services!
Art connects us to one another. It’s a way to express ourselves and show how we view the world.
Michael Sio is doing such with his art.
The art works of the Nairobi based artist gives satirical commentary on contemporary social, economic and political trends in Kenya.
Soi touches on ‘taboo’ issues that are controversial in Kenyan society such as commercial sex work and corruption.
In 2012 and 2013, he created a series of satirical China Loves Africapaintings to question the intentions of China in Africa.
The paintings explores China-Africa partnership as that of neo-colonialism. His work views the relationship as a “love affair” profiting one side. China is hungry for raw materials from Africa and Africa is poor and desperate.With African leaders are looking trade partners who will not ask questions, he likens China to a sugar daddy,
In 2015, he created more paintings titled The Shame of Venice to offer his take on persons who lack the capacity to represent Kenya’s contemporary art to the international arena, posturing to the world as the Kenyan Pavilion.
Asides from bringing attention to happenings in Kenyan society, Soi is making a visual diary of Kenya so that those not yet born can get to see what the country looked like.
Soi’s paintings aren’t restricted to the heavy stuff. He also has beautifully drawn painting printed on tote bags, such as these one:
Often times we discuss the effects of patriarchy on women in a society, but truth be told the effects are also detrimental to men. As a result of these perceptions and pressures, here are 10 things about being a man in Nigeria:
1. If you don’t have a job get ready for your man license to be revoked.
2. You must be responsible for your wife, children, her parents and siblings, your parents and siblings without complaining all on your 100k salary.
Even if you end up with a stroke from all the pressure what is the big deal. Are you not a man? Oh and prepare for the waiter to always hand you the bill.
3. You should not cry ever. You are not a human being, you are a man. Emotions are not built for people like you.
4. Don’t attend a school reunion without your property and car on fleek because being broke is never an option.
5. You are not allowed to earn less than your wife.
6. You must be a good leader and be financially astute just by virtue of being a man even though you haven’t got the faintest clue about any of those things.
7. You should never ask for help. A real man is always in control even though your life might be falling to pieces.
8. You should never admit that you do not know how to do something. Are you not a man?
9. You are not expected to know how to cook or wash your own underwear. Prepare to be constantly infantalised.
Men shouldn’t be taught some basic survival skills like learning to nourish themselves or how to keep themselves clean.
10. When there is a loss, you are not permitted to grieve. You must be strong for everyone else.
If you breakdown what are the rest of us meant to do. Men are not weak.
Though it seems like all laughs, the realities can be quite grim when you take out time to ruminate through the issues. Voices For Change have recently produced their landmark research conducted across various states and regions in the country into a report aptly titled ‘Being A Man In Nigeria Perception And Realities’.
Some statistics from the report are heartbreaking and further remind us about the dangers of patriarchal systems to both men and boys and why the need for empowerment and gender parity is still a pertinent issue. You can download the report here.
Written by Zikoko contributor Wana Udobang.
Wana Udobang is a broadcaster, writer, poet, performer, filmmaker and curator working out of Lagos, Nigeria.
1. Whenever you remember our politicians are literally the worst.
No seriously, will you die if you fix the roads?
2. When everything, somehow, someway always boils down to tribe and religion.
One would think that 55 years after independence we would get along better, but no, we’re still squabbling like it’s 1960.
3. When you think about the internet struggle.
One minute you’re watching that video that everyone on Twitter is talking about, next minute all your airtime is gone.
4. When you remember our outrageously expensive National Assembly.
Why are they so many? Why do they cost us so much? Why do they receive so many allowances? What do they actually do to earn all that money?
5. When you can’t even remember a Nigeria without generator noise.
Those things are so noisy! How is everyone in Nigeria not mad and deaf yet?
6. When you have to suffer the fake, ear-bleeding accents of our radio and TV personalities.
Yeah, we get it. You’re an ‘ajebutter’, you’re posh and all of that, but please can you stop?
7. Whenever you remember the value of the naira.
1 Dollar = N199.25; 1 Pound = N305.45; 1 Euro = N220.11. #dasall
8. When it feels like all Government agencies are in some grand conspiracy to frustrate us.
NYSC registration? Getting a new passport? Renewing your driver’s license? Prepare to be frustrated. Do I really need to give you my name, age, address and colour of my underwear again?
9. When no one you know seems to mind their business.
How does it really concern you that he doesn’t have a wife yet? Or that your neighbour’s daughter has pink hair? Or that I did not go to church?
10. When you realize that you are your own government.
You provide everything for yourself, electricity, water, healthcare, education, security and even roads. Explain to me why we have a government again?
11. When you have to travel by air.
You’ve either been a victim of Nigerian air travel or you know someone who has. If your flight isn’t taking off 7hours late, you’re in Calabar and your luggage is in Yola.
12. Whenever you have to enter public transport.
The whole thing is just a nightmare.
13. When you have to deal with a police officer.
Am I the only one afraid of the police? There are good ones dedicated to their jobs, sure, but the rest…#nocomment.
14. When you don’t get why Landlords ask for 2 years rent upfront.
…and that’s minus the host of other fees.
15. When it dawns on you that you live in constant fear of one chance and armed robbers.
Do I really need to elaborate on this?
Let’s face it, being Nigerian is hard and stressful and some days you wish you could relocate to some remote island and forget about everything…
But the truth of the matter is that, Nigeria is home and even though we have so many problems, these problems make us stronger and give us insane survival skills…
And besides, can you imagine life without party jollof and small chops?
Written by Zikoko Contributor @IdomaGirl.
African parents (especially Nigerians) are the same all over the world. But when this chap decided to prank his mother by pretending to get a tattoo.
Her reaction is straight out of the African Mother’s Playbook.
1. She Will Blame Your Friends.
Because you cannot be the bad one among your friends; they are always influencing you.
2. She Will Bring the Spiritual Angle.
In case you don’t know, the Bible [or Koran] is against that thing you just did. You mother knows chapter and verse.
3. When She Discovers You Got a Dragon Tattoo.
You sef no try. A dragon? Are you Harry Potter?
4. A Holy Book Will Be Quoted.
This is why you should pay attention in Sunday School.
5. She Will Close the Door So You Can’t Escape.
You’re a prisoner in your parent’s house. If you doubt it, try and pass that door she just closed.
6. She Will Bring Up Your Health.
Your mother is concerned about your health. Because if you die, how will you give her grandchildren and shame her enemies?
Enjoy the video here.
And ask yourself, what would my mother do if I came home with a tattoo?
More often than not, Nigeria has been portrayed in a negative light by the Western media.
Rather than showing the different facets of the country, attention is focused on the bad side, which is what Chimamanda talked about in The Danger of a Single Story.
These days, the different stories of Nigeria are told by Nigerians, as well as foreign individuals that have taken up interest in the culture of the country.
Snap It Oga documents the everyday lives of Lagosians on the streets of Lagos.
The project was started by Indian photoblogger Devesh Uba, who has been living in Lagos since 2013.
Devesh decided to capture and showcase his pictures online to show the world that there’s a lot more to Nigerian than the negative PR we get.
Before coming to Nigeria, Devesh research about the country, but couldn’t find anything positive online. It was a different story when he got here. In an interview for Bialere he said,
“I realized there are lot of positives which everyone conveniently ignores. There is art almost everywhere… on Danfos, on streets, on shop signboards, on school walls and so on. The people of Lagos ‘hustle’ and do it with a smile. The colors of the markets are so vibrant and the ‘never say die’ spirit of people here is just so inspiring. The Nigerian love for food, football and music is just infectious.”
Apart from the exposure that Nigeria gets from the project, Snap It Oga will preserve the Lagos street aesthetic for future generations to see what urban life in Lagos looked like.
Time to put on your dancing shoes and hit the town.
Then you get a text “Don’t forget there is vigil this this evening”.
Ah ah mummy. Vigil ke? These church people sef.Wasn’t there vigil last week?
So you think of a way to wriggle out of this one.
And when you get home start giving your mum some sweet tales.
While your siblings are looking at you like
Ah you can liiiieeeee!
Your mum finally lets you off the hook with
While one sibling is busy chatting like
Who asked you? Bad belle.
So you go and gather your best baffs.
They ain’t never seen nothing like this.
And sneak out of the house like an armed robber.
You and your friends arrive looking sweet!
Abeg you wan try?
Only for the bouncer to say it’s full.
My friend do you know what I did to get here? Better open this place.
After small wash, he allows you in and you enter the place with style.
Only for you to see your ex with that babe he said was his cousin.
But wait…
Then you remember you don’t care because you are better.
You look to the left and see your crush.
Well… Hello fine boy.
You look to the left and see his girlfriend.
When will I finally win?
Then you remember what you and your friends came for once you hear “It’s Young John ..”
Give them!
*Bado sneh!*
Show them!
And your personal favourite “aruba”.
Finish them!
Even though at the end of the night you smell like cigarette smoke and you’ve danced your makeup off and you’ve spent too much money, you feel fulfilled after a Lagos night out and are ready to do it again next week.
Over the past few days, thousands of protesters in South Africa have been speaking out against the government’s decision to raise school fees by 10.5%.
The protesters believe the rise in tuition will make tertitary education unaffordable and will prevent poor black students from accessing and benefitting from education. Demanding instead for institutions to provide free education for all.
https://instagram.com/p/9GqEBtKBrT/
The hashtags #FeesMustFall, #NationalShutDown and #ZumaMustFall have been trending on social media and the important message is being received all over Africa and all around the world.
If your child was born in 2015, by the time they reach 18, university fees for an average 4-year degree could cost R1.2M #FeesMustFall
The protests began on Monday with students barricading a number of South African campuses including the University of Cape Town and University of the Witwatersrand in Johannesburg. Today, over a dozen universities have been involved in the demonstrations.
But what was originally intended as a peaceful protest that demanded answers from the ANC, resulted in policemen releasing teargas, stun grenades and arresting students.
Overall, many South Africans feel this is a mirror event to the Soweto uprising in 1976 when students protesting against apartheid language policies were fired on by police.
The only thing that changed is the quality of our cameras . Our leaders have failed us pic.twitter.com/iZMqAjKeYn
South African President, Jacob Zuma, is reportedly planning to meet with student leaders and university administrators today according to his spokesman, Bongani Majola. We hope that an agreement can be made. In the meantime, our thoughts remain with our South African brothers and sisters.
In 2015, quality education should really be free for all.
If you are familiar with social media at all, you’ve definitely seen the hashtags #BlackGirlsKillingIt, #AfricanMenKillingIt, #MelaninOnFleek and similar hashtags used a lot over the past few years.
Social media and the love for selfies have definitely exposed us to more of the beauty of our African people.
But even before the days of social media, there were the phrases “Black is beautiful” and Black don’t crack”.
So today, we are here to prove that these hashstags and phrases are not mere speculation but indeed FACT!
Here are 35 images that show the beauty and diversity of our African people.
@zikokomag surveyor, triplets named wisdom,knowledge and understanding, PraiseGod,Stellakonibaelemije(after his motherinlaw) — fueksy megs (@fueksy) October 19, 2015
@zikokomag won’t be surprised. After hearing Excel (brightest guy in class), Appearance, Best and Paymaster (he really was one)… — dayo b (@i_am_dayoB) October 19, 2015
@SistaSparkles@zikokomag Kai! She must have been teased a lot. I would have changed my name. The most bizarre I’ve heard is God’s Property — dayo b (@i_am_dayoB) October 19, 2015
@zikokomag they weren’t Nigerian, but Cameroon is close enough. Went to school with an Almighty and a Forgiveness — Ogbenyealu (@notgonnabeawest) October 19, 2015
“@zikokomag: Orimogunje, Takeagoodposition, Triumphant Grandeur. What are the funniest Nigerian names you’ve ever heard? >> Arsenal of God. — Adenike Lanlehin (@omotomilola) October 19, 2015
@zikokomag Goodluck (we all know who that is lol), Sir Louis ( yup, the Sir is included), Boniface, Bonacristus, hallelujah, fortunate etc? — Dami Odufuwa (@dami_odufuwa) October 19, 2015
@zikokomag heard of a boy in Rivers State named ‘Corper 2000’ ; named after a 2000 set corper, who impregnated a local girl and absconded. — Olufemi Adebimpe (@femiadebimpe) October 19, 2015
Oluwatobi’s T16 world of Fashion was part of the top 15 fashion focus finalists at GTB Lagos Fashion and Design Week, 2014 and one of the top 4 finalists at the DSTV Fashion Protégé Contest. Her collection was showcased at the Africa Fashion Week Nigeria, Lagos Fashion and Design Week, and the MTN Business Overlook Forum. SS15, the latest from the label, was debuted early this year.
2. Akabogu Ogochukwu – Lines by Chaab
Ogochukwu’s Lines by Chaab emerged winner of the Nigerias’ Next Top Designer Competition and won the Music Meets Runway ‘Rising Icon Competition’ in 2014. She has exhibited the label at the Africa Fashion Week Nigeria and Winasbet Nigerian Student Fashion and Design Week. In 2014, Ogochukwu was rated as one of the top 12 newcomers in the industry by BlackNBold Fashion House. Lines by Chaab has been featured on E! Online, Africa Magic, Studio 53, Pulse Nigeria, Onobello, Bella Naija; and will be showcasing again at the Music Meets Runway later this year.
3. Chukwudozie Maduabum – Counterfeit Designs
via pulse.ng
Chukwudozie’s Counterfeit Designs offers uniquely packaged bespoke shoes handmade in Nigeria, both male and female, including brogues, monk straps, oxford shoes, loafers, and various other kinds of shoes. The Counterfeit Design brand was a clothing and shoes line but ultimately veered strictly into shoes in 2014.
4. Kofoworola Akinjomo – KophoJomo
Kofoworola’s KophoJomo is a brand that focuses on eccentric creativity and that was obvious when she won at the 2012 edition of the annual Redefinition Fashion Show. The show featured newspaper dresses, styled it after the fashion of the 20’s, the flapper and the fringed dress age.
5. Omowunmi Owonifari – Mo’fari Couture
Omowunmi’s Mo’fari Couture was a part of the top 15 Lagos Fashion and Design Week and British Council Fashion Focus 2014 finalists. Her latest collection was showcased at the Lagos Fashion and Design Week 2014. The label was one of the four finalists at the 2015 Zinkata Red Carpet Challenge. In June 2014, Omowunmi was featured in the Guardian Newspaper as the ‘Designer of the Week’.
6. Folu Ajayi – House of Dabira
Folu’s House of Dabira was nominated for the Oyo 30under30 Awards, Fashion Category, in December 2013. The brand has showcased at the Nigerian Television Fashion Show, The Dreams Come True Show With Jazzyb, Miss Heritage Competition and the Ife Runway Fashion Show. In 2013, an official launch for the brand was held in April at the University of Ibadan; after which she participated at the Nigerian Student Fashion and Design Week in June, at the University of Lagos. Her brand recently won the Zinkata Red Carpet Challenge, for which she got to dress Dakore Egbuson-Akande for the 2015 Africa Magic Viewers’ Choice Awards.
7. Gbenga Luke-Adetule – NVO
Gbenga’s NVO showcased at the second edition of Winasbet Nigerian Student Fashion and Design Week (NSFDW) in June 2014, and at the Nubian Runway and Fashion Show (N.R.F.S) in August 2014. NVO apparel recently signed a partnership deal with Goge Africa, where the label gets to dress their TV presenters for a period of time.
8. Kambili Ofili-Okonkwo – Kamokini
Kambili’s swimwear brand, Kamokini aims to provide a swimwear brand that caters to “what real women expect of a fashionable, affordable and figure complimenting swimsuit”. The Kamokini “Blocks” feature sexy cut outs & very colourful pieces. Kamokini was one of the three finalists at the 2015 She Leads Africa Entrepreneur Showcase.
9. Ifeanyi Nwunne – IN Official
Ifeanyi Nwune, only 20 years old, is one of Africa’s youngest fashion designers, he recently presented his Spring/Summer 2015 collection featuring models Peter Fin and Ndani TV presenter, Onos O. He is mostly known for minimalist designs and has styled various celebrities including D’banj, Iceprince and Runtown.
10. Bimbo Oye-Akinnifesi – Reni Smiths
Bimbo Oye-Akinnifesi’s Reni Smiths was launched at the 2013 edition of GTB Lagos Fashion & Design Week. She was one of the top 10 young designers showcasing the Bella Donna collection.
11. Modupe Adeoti – 17.09 Couture
Modupe’s 17.09 Couture has released three collections released so far, the last been a runway collection showcased at the Winasbet Nigerian Student Design and Fashion Week in 2014 which was referred to as the brands major debut. Modupe was listed under the Top 12 fashion industry newcomers in the year 2014 with her brand in the Top 10. She was also one of the finalists that made it to the Game On house for team fashion, The reality TV show sponsored by Malta Guinness, which has been a huge break out for the brand. Her “Silver Lining Collection” was just recently released.
Honestly, I cannot pick a favorite. They’re all so good. We know there are more designers out there; so which upcoming designers did we miss?
Nigerian bosses are known for their ‘unique’ approaches when it comes to mentoring or ‘disciplining’ their coworkers.
It tends to be similar to a ‘Nigerian parent to child’ relationship.
Examples of these relationships have been highlighted in the past by Zikoko here and here.
But truthfully, we all know a relationship between a boss and his employee should be like none of these! So today we are here to speak on such matters.
This is a call of duty to all Nigerian employees. If any of the following apply to you, you have an evil boss matter on your hands:
1. Has your boss ever asked you to kneel down at work and beg for your job?
2. Locked you out of the office gate because you were simply 10 minutes late?!
3. Has your boss ever threatened to slap you?
4. And actually gone through with it?!
5. Or mentioned how ‘useless’ you are in front of all your junior colleagues?
6. Or made you stay in the office till after midnight simply because he is wicked and wants you to be as miserable as he is?
7. Has your boss asked you to go and fix their shoes, carry their handbag or pick their kids from school? But you are in fact the bank manager with multiple degrees?
If any of these sound familiar, share your experiences with Zikoko by emailing your most shocking and hilarious experiences to lola@zikokomag.com and we will ANONYMOUSLY share with your fellow Nigerians the things that some evil bosses in Nigeria do to their employees.
If you are feeling brave or looking for social media fame, feel free to tweet us @zikokomag using the hashtag #EvilNigerianBosses.
If your parents decided to go for a more unique traditional name for you, instead of a common English name like John/ Mary or a well known Yoruba name like Tolu/Tobi, then you’ll understand the struggle.
1. When the most common response you get after saying your name is “ehn?”
Na wa.
2. When someone starts squeezing their face while trying to pronounce it.
It’s not that serious, please.
3. When someone asks you if you have an English name instead.
Better learn this one.
4. When you were the first of your friends to get a nickname, because no one had energy.
Did I tell you I want a nickname?
5. When everyone keeps asking you what it means.
Leave me, abeg.
6. When someone gets it on the first try.
OMG! Marry me.
7. When someone asks you if it’s really your name.
Is this one well?
8. When you just knew it would never be on any coke bottle.
Oh? You have Akpors but you don’t have my name?
9. When you have to raise your hand before they get to announcing your name to save them the stress.
Before you bite your tongue.
10. When even your phone’s autocorrect thinks it’s wrong.
Really? REALLY??
11. When you have to constantly correct it on official documents.
Is this my life?
12. When even your friends spell it wrong.
The betrayal.
13. When you just start answering to all the different pronunciations people have for it.
Just say it however you like.
14. When someone asks you why your parents gave it to you.
Why are you asking me?
15. When even you start to wonder why your parents gave it to you.
She just changed her relationship status on Facebook to ‘Single’ and told me she thought I’d take the hint. https://t.co/eGl29hKCwU — Mark Aroni (@NerdEfiko) October 15, 2015
Another one said “it is not you, it is me. I need space to really serve God.” ???? https://t.co/WFHIX9Ub1e — Nigerian Gatsby (@Ruud_bishop) October 15, 2015
She started serving God on another relationship though. I think it was less than a month later. ???????? — Nigerian Gatsby (@Ruud_bishop) October 15, 2015
BellaNaija steady helping girl dem to find out that Boo get Boo — N. M. Nwachukwu★ (@PUREHAIRE) October 15, 2015
7. Different religions don’t mix.
@zikokomag I am a Muslim, and you are Christian. It would not have been painful, but we had been together for? Just forget the years. — Kolawole Ogunfowokan (@kolawole_john) October 15, 2015
@zikokomag with their lifestyles. Because I’m already tired of the chillationship, i look for an excuse to bail. — Eniola. (@Dxski_) October 15, 2015
10. The post-shag break up.
My boy that broke up with babe in the middle of post-shag cuddle nko? See ehn, let me skip this thing. It will lead to wahala. — Nigerian Gatsby (@Ruud_bishop) October 15, 2015
11. He was too sacrificial.
The chap changed uni, just to be closer to her. She said that was too much sacrifice for a relationship. She walked. End of story. — Nigerian Gatsby (@Ruud_bishop) October 15, 2015
12. She was too slim.
3 years into relationship, baba suddenly realised babe was too slim for his liking. No chance for her to even add flesh. ? — Nigerian Gatsby (@Ruud_bishop) October 15, 2015
13. Body count was too much.
He asked for body count and promised he wouldn’t get angry….. That was the last day I heard from him #breakupstories#zikoko — Mrs Surnamepending (@Surnamepending) October 15, 2015
@zikokomag Dem plenty na. Pick one, dumped at altar, handed wedding invite, faked disease…dem plenty — N. M. Nwachukwu★ (@PUREHAIRE) October 15, 2015
16. He was too sick of the relationship.
@buky@zikokomag Lol! Dude faked an illness so the girl will leave him alone. See, it was necessary. Girl was a stalker mehn — N. M. Nwachukwu★ (@PUREHAIRE) October 15, 2015
@zikokomag when you really couldn’t understand the I am a Muslim & you are Christian part, you hear, you didn’t call on my birthday. I Cried — Kolawole Ogunfowokan (@kolawole_john) October 15, 2015
20. She would fit in that old tv show called ‘Cheaters Inc’.
Owerri breakup story. Guy found girl was cheating on BB Bold he bought for her so he stole it, sold it and bought his guys beer. — Nwa Ka Ibe Ya (@Dikachim) October 15, 2015
21. She liked another guys Instagram pictures. All of them.
@zikokomag A really persistent classmate in high school kept asking me to be his bf. I finally agreed a day before my family moved away… — Chioma Nkemdilim (@chiomankemdilim) October 15, 2015
23. First come, first serve.
We were both in 100 level. Caught her with a 400 level guy, she said “why didn’t you ask me first? He asked first.” https://t.co/617JJcLgL0 — Nwa Ka Ibe Ya (@Dikachim) October 15, 2015
24. He was part of her New Years resolution.
If nobody has ever broken up with you with the reason that you are not part of their new year resolution, go and have a seat. — michael (@hemical) October 15, 2015
25. The birthday break up.
@zikokomag Waited till my B-day. She said she did 3 things to hurt me n felt no remorse cos she has moved on, I should do so too. — Cumrade Abba NoMo` (@Kennedy_Reborn) October 15, 2015
26. She was too pretty.
@zikokomag the closest I heard was I am scared of falling in love with a mermaid…so many men are on your case? #dumbshit — Whitney (@SexyWeetney) October 15, 2015
27. She doesn’t have a BSc. degree.
@zikokomag a couple of weeks ago, someone here said her boyfriend broke up with her because she attended a Polytechnic ? @seyitaylor — Niyoola_ (@niyoola_) October 15, 2015
28. When he’s the side n**ga.
@zikokomag 300 L Uni. Nothing spells it out like you’re at ur girl’s @ night, some guy knocked & she tackles you down to keep mute fam. — Cumrade Abba NoMo` (@Kennedy_Reborn) October 15, 2015
@zikokomag my roomate girl left him cos he took a selfie nd her Ass was showing at the back — Aniemena (@ikennaesq) October 15, 2015
31. The oldest break up line in the book.
‘It’s not you, it’s me’, I need to get my life together.. 4 years later nothing has changed in said life ☺ https://t.co/JDixd4ejVo — Shereefah (@cheryldulhams) October 15, 2015
32. He ‘janded’.
My girl lives in ?? her bf lives in Lagos, she got him entry into the states for six months it was his first time going, #breakupstories — Mrs Surnamepending (@Surnamepending) October 15, 2015
