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1. When the ATM in front of a bank doesn’t have money in it.
2. When the ATM swallows your card on a weekend.
3. Nigerians and “Are you the last pulzon on the queue? Amatyourback.”
4. When someone tries to jump the queue.
5. You, when you want to check your account balance.
6. When you don’t withdraw because you’re broke and someone asks “is it dispensing?”
7. When it doesn’t bring out your money but you get a debit alert.
8. When someone asks you to help them use the ATM.
9. When the person using the ATM is reading it as if it’s a novel.
10. Whenever you see “Issuer or Switch Inoperative”
11. When someone goes to the ATM that doesn’t have a line in front of it instead of going to the one with a queue.
12. When the ATM asks if you want a receipt then says it doesn’t have paper.
13. When the ATM just swallowed someone’s card and they tell you to try your own.
14. You, when the ATM makes that ‘Krrrrrrrr’ sound.
15. How you feel every time your bank takes that N65:
