The Zikoko Guide to becoming a good Nigerian House Husband

Nigerians are forever full of advice for house wives. But what of house husbands?

It’s not like they don’t exist. I mean what will you call your Uncle Tade that has refused to look for a job for the last ten years while his wife works to provide for the whole family?

Because nobody ever talks about it, house husbands in Nigeria don’t seem to know their roles.

Nigerian parents and pastors are oddly silent on this topic.

Since no one else will offer it, I’m here with Sage advice for all the house husbands in Nigeria.

Now, gather round. It’s time to learn how to be a really really good house husband.

First of all, it’s your sole responsibility to get the kids ready for school, drop them off, pick them up, supervise their homework and feed them.

Because if you really love them, then you have to do it.

You have to wake up before her so that you can start doing one or two things around the house before she wakes up.

Who will make her breakfast before she goes to work? Or you want her to go to work on an empty stomach?

Make sure there is a hot meal waiting on the table for your wife before she comes back from work.

And it must always be freshly made. Stale food is for losers. And you’re not a loser, are you?

If she decides out of the goodness of her heart to help you around the house you had better be grateful.

Do you think it’s easy? After all the hard day’s job.

On top of cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids and running the whole house you have to remember to always look good for your wife.

Did she marry you with a pot belly? If you are not careful she’ll leave you for a better-looking man. A beard is great, but you better trim it properly.

Remember to stay on top of your sex game. You might be tired from having to keep the house running by yourself but can you be more tired than the person putting food on the table?

You’re not expecting this to be over in 10 minutes, right?

If she ever cheats by mistake you have to forgive her.

It’s probably not even her fault. Examine your conscience. You must be the reason she cheated.

Never question her authority, after all are you the one paying the children’s school fees?

An obedient husband is a happy husband.

Now go forth and flourish as the good husband we know you have the potential to be.

Any questions? Feel free to drop more advice if you have any.

While we are on the topic of Nigerian men, find out if they care about romance at all in this video.