Unemployed | Zikoko!

You can finally love Mondays

People will be scrambling to get to work, but you just can’t relate because you’re still in bed at 11 a.m. Don’t you just love that?

No billing from family members

Everyone knows you’re unemployed and don’t earn a salary. What are they even billing?

No more taxes to cut your salary in half

Imagine handing over one-third of your salary to this government. Who does that? Even God only asked for ten per cent.

You can pursue a better-paying career

An example that works well is having a sugar daddy or mummy. You’re still earning a salary, but you’re no longer doing a 9 to 5. It’s more like 5 to 9 now.

You can always say you’re an “entrepreneur”

No one will question you if you don’t look like you’re suffering. And even if you do, you can always blame it on the hustle.

You can also make a killing from begging

If fronting as an entrepreneur doesn’t work, hit the streets and start begging. You’ll make bank.

You can finally finally chase your dreams

According to motivational speakers, “Your salary is the bribe they pay you to forget your dreams”. So what happens when you don’t earn a salary? Of course, you’ll chase your dreams. You might be chasing actual dreams by sleeping all day, but that’s still a win.

Or you can focus on making heaven

Stay unemployed so you can shift your focus from worldly things, and put everything into making it to heaven.

You can finally find love

If you can’t find love in the office, maybe you’ll find it if you spend your 9-to-5 in the streets. Think about it.

NEXT READ: 7 Ways To Make Money Without Working For It

Sheriff Alimi

June 23, 2023

Money

capitalism, dream jobs, money, Unemployed, Unemployment
1. “Eh ya, sorry!”

Really?
2. “Send your CV”

So you’ll give it to the akara woman in your street, abi?
3. “Why don’t you start a business?”

With the money you gave me.
4. “Why are you waiting for the government to create jobs for you?”

Please don’t be foolish.
5. “Come and work for exposure”

BYE!
6. “What about civil service?”

Does your daddy have the connect though?
7. “Immigration is hiring”

I’m not ready to die please.
8. “We’ll get back to you”.

Don’t do this, please.
9. “You’re over-qualified for the position we’re offering”.

What does that even mean?
10. “Take this test…”

As per, WAEC part 2?

Maryam

April 20, 2017

Oldies

cv, employment, Job, Unemployed, work
1. …Because I’m broke?

I don’t understand the question oga.
2. …My brother, do you think bag of rice is cheap?

Oga please, no vex me today.
3. …Is this a joke?

Or do I look like I came here to laugh?
4. …You know there’s recession ba?

It’s not just a word oga, it’s very real.
5. …If you wanted me to beg, why didn’t you just say it

Just say the words and i’ll beg, no dey form.
6. …Oya I’m begging, I take God beg you

Please don’t make cry because I can do it.
7. Please…my brother, I’m so hungry.

It’s my stomach that is sounding, not the generator.

Osaretin Tunde-Oni

November 25, 2016

Oldies

nigerian job, Unemployed
Everybody told you that you need to get a degree so you can go and find work.

You have gotten the degree now, but you’re still here looking for work like:

Every single job ad you’ve seen looks like this:

Nigerian job opening ad: Financial analyst wanted. Male, between 21 and 21.5 with at least 22 years job experience. Must also be female.
— Chef-D’œuvre (@TemiMartin) November 12, 2015
Everybody keeps asking you for job experience, but they will not hire you so you can get the experience.

You see some jobs you clearly don’t qualify for, but you apply for them anyway.

You remember saying your starting salary must be 200k and above, but you are starting to reconsider.

You used to see people walking around with this thing, and you’ve now joined them.

You have been hearing “unpaid internship” up and down, but you’re not that desperate yet.

You have even gone to meet that uncle that promised he’d help you after you graduate, but he is like:

People keep inviting you for job seminars, but you’re just here like:

You have finally resorted to sharing your CV like party pack, “you get a CV, you get a CV, EVERYBODY GETS A CV.”

Your CV is currently on almost every online job site in Nigeria.

Your email is currently filled with messages from them, but you are still jobless.

You stated the kind of jobs you wanted on the sites, but they keep sending you openings that don’t concern you.

You keep seeing job ads on the sites that literally have no details about the job.

You even went for one of the interviews they sent you, but it turned out to be a scam.

You, when they told you to pay before you could apply for the job.

You were so broke you even started considering selling your stuff.

…but then you landed on Efritin.com and saw ‘Job Vacancies’.

You saw ‘verified employers’ and accurate job descriptions.

Now you can search for a proper job without all the unnecessary wahala.

Oya! Quickly go on Efritin.com and start your wahala-free job search now!
Efritin.com, Nigeria’s No.1 marketplace for used goods! Buy and sell everything from used cars to mobile phones and computers, or search for property, jobs and more in Nigeria – for free!

Daniel Orubo

December 15, 2015

Oldies

Efritin, Job Hunt, Jobless, Nigeria, sponsored, Unemployed
Odunayo

September 9, 2015

Inside Life

Graduate, Nigeria, NYSC, Unemployed, Unemployment

You can finally love Mondays

No billing from family members

No more taxes to cut your salary in half

You can pursue a better-paying career

You can always say you’re an “entrepreneur”

You can also make a killing from begging

You can finally finally chase your dreams

Or you can focus on making heaven

You can finally find love

1. “Eh ya, sorry!”

2. “Send your CV”

3. “Why don’t you start a business?”

4. “Why are you waiting for the government to create jobs for you?”

5. “Come and work for exposure”

6. “What about civil service?”

7. “Immigration is hiring”

8. “We’ll get back to you”.

9. “You’re over-qualified for the position we’re offering”.

10. “Take this test…”

1. …Because I’m broke?

2. …My brother, do you think bag of rice is cheap?

3. …Is this a joke?

4. …You know there’s recession ba?

5. …If you wanted me to beg, why didn’t you just say it

6. …Oya I’m begging, I take God beg you

7. Please…my brother, I’m so hungry.

Everybody told you that you need to get a degree so you can go and find work.

You have gotten the degree now, but you’re still here looking for work like:

Every single job ad you’ve seen looks like this:

Everybody keeps asking you for job experience, but they will not hire you so you can get the experience.

You see some jobs you clearly don’t qualify for, but you apply for them anyway.

You remember saying your starting salary must be 200k and above, but you are starting to reconsider.

You used to see people walking around with this thing, and you’ve now joined them.

You have been hearing “unpaid internship” up and down, but you’re not that desperate yet.

You have even gone to meet that uncle that promised he’d help you after you graduate, but he is like:

People keep inviting you for job seminars, but you’re just here like:

You have finally resorted to sharing your CV like party pack, “you get a CV, you get a CV, EVERYBODY GETS A CV.”

Your CV is currently on almost every online job site in Nigeria.

Your email is currently filled with messages from them, but you are still jobless.

You stated the kind of jobs you wanted on the sites, but they keep sending you openings that don’t concern you.

You keep seeing job ads on the sites that literally have no details about the job.

You even went for one of the interviews they sent you, but it turned out to be a scam.

You, when they told you to pay before you could apply for the job.

You were so broke you even started considering selling your stuff.

…but then you landed on Efritin.com and saw ‘Job Vacancies’.

You saw ‘verified employers’ and accurate job descriptions.

Now you can search for a proper job without all the unnecessary wahala.

Efritin.com, Nigeria’s No.1 marketplace for used goods! Buy and sell everything from used cars to mobile phones and computers, or search for property, jobs and more in Nigeria – for free!