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1. It’s a cold night, I’m walking back and forth my parents room, wondering how to make this one request.
I wanted to go to a party! Not a birthday party or a family party or even a school party. I wanted to go to a club.
2. And that’s not the mad part,
I was 13.
3. The girls in school had been talking all week long about it, and when they invited me nko?
Waawu. First of all, I want to thank you all for this opportunity to mingle.
4. I eventually got the courage to ask my parents about going for my friend’s birthday, and they were like,
Waiiit, whatt?
5. I spent the entire night trying on clothes and dancing to Wizkid’s Superstar album
I’m ready to die on the line.
6. Fast forward to next day, what I planned to look like,
All hail the Queen.
7. After a long night, this is what I actually looked like
Yep. I showed up looking like a Rainbow.
8. I sat and watched as people danced, drank and smoked like
Wawu. All these people are going to Hell Fire.
9. And then I realised my friends probably abandoned me because I was boring.
Do I look like a clown? Am I crossing my leg too much? Am I smelling like soak-away?
Damn you insecurity! Damn you!
10. I was like, you know what?
I’m out please.
11. Went out to get a cab and after waiting for a maximum of 5 seconds, I can say God strategically placed my parents passing by at the exact same time.
This is the day I died guys. This very day.
12. It was a silent ride home, and I was looking out the window like
Wow wow wow, is this how my life will end?
13. As we reached home, before I could fully understand anything, the first cane landed on my back
Kuku kill me dad. Kuku kill me.
14. Then suddenly suddenly, I fainted.
Come and see how everywhere scattered.
15. Bruh, I was just pretending
Everybody was praying and just pouring water unneccessarily.
16. That’s how they rushed me to hospital.
“My daughter stay with me!”
17. Next thing, what did my father tell the doctor, “Do pregnancy test.”
Waaaait, what?!
18. That’s how my fainting finished o
Like, daddy how did we go from fainting to pregnancy? How can I even get pregnant today today?
19. Last last, that beating that day is why I still don’t don’t enter clubs
Something about PTSD. Can’t be letting “Holler at your boy” trigger “I will kill you today.”
I wonder what else I don’t like because of the beating I received growing up.
20. So tell me, what’s that thing your parents beat out of you, and you still can’t do till date?
Brows are usually raised at older men who hold unnecessary conversations and consequently make advances to underage girls.
What are you even looking for, sir?
Tyga broke his first record of dating underage girls at 25 when he landed his current girlfriend Kylie when she was just 17.
Because, catch them young.
He dropped a single titled “Stimulated” with questionable lyrics focused on intercourse with a younger girl.
Could he be referring to his girlfriend? Maybe. The internet world made little noise about it and got with the program after a while because she was only a year younger than 18.
But like the proverbial leopard that never changes its spots, Tyga was alleged to have been in love with and keeping in close touch with a 14 year old Instagram model and singer.
Wow!
Molly O’Malia then came out in (crocodile) tears to the press after a blurred picture of her was plastered on a magazine, blaming her for breaking Tyga and Kylie up in November, 2015.
She mentioned how he slid into her DMs and constantly messaged her, asking her to FaceTime with him more than once.
Tyga has gone on TMZ to say he was only interested in her singing talent but the press and blogs aren’t having any of it.
