secondary school | Page 7 of 8

16 Pictures That Will Only Make Sense To People Who Attended AFSS Ikeja

1. We hail thee Alma matter…

“Perseverance breeds success.”
2. The only houses that mattered:

Mig House steady carrying last sha.
3. Everybody walking to the ESD field for Inter-house sports practice like:

The most annoying walk ever.
4. The BEST teacher to ever do it:

If you still didn’t like Economics after he taught you, then I don’t know again. May his soul rest in peace.
5. You and your guys, arriving for Speech and Prize giving day in you trads like:

TURN UP!
6. How you felt whenever you had to go into the admin block:

The fear was too real.
7. Whenever students saw RSM M.W.O Maha coming.

I cannot come and die.
8. How soldiers see you when you don’t have a badge on your uniform:

It’s all over.
9. Your face, when you hear that Oga Abdul is the one to flog you:

I’m dead.
10. Whenever someone tries to beg you for doughnut at Zobo joint.

Better leave my front.
11. When you hear that you have to go to Mr. Martins office for Maths.

You know someone will sha get flogged.
12. Whenever soldiers decided to walk along the assembly line for inspection.

Baba God, be a shield.
13. Baba Seun, whenever boys went to play games after school:

He used us to cash out sha.
14. When you had a free period and Commandant was roaming senior block.

Before they will flog us to death.
15. You, heading to Bush Canteen when school closes:

No time.
16. The school’s unofficial mascot:

Met it and left it there.

Daniel Orubo

May 24, 2016

Oldies

Africa, AFSS, Airforce, Ikeja, Nigeria, secondary school
16 Images That Will Take You Right Back To Your Secondary School’s Inter-House Sports

1. How you always looked in your house shirt:

It can never be your size.
2. When the principal announces that there will be no classes.

YES LORD!
3. When one teacher still wants to teach during inter-house sports practice.

Leave this place.
4. That teacher that always carried the training on their head as if it was for Olympics:

Biko, calm down.
5. When you see that Milo truck arriving.

Cold Milo for the men them.
6. When your house captain gives you the glucose to hold.

The best.
7. When girls hear “It’s time for 100m senior boys”.

The only race that matters.
8. When you see someone from a visiting school talking to your crush.

It can pain.
9. You, when house captain is looking for people to do match pass.

God forbid.
10. Those students that couldn’t care less about participating:

All of us at some point.
11. What it looked like after every 800m race:

Na die.
12. When your parents come to watch you and you come last.

Hay God!
13. Your guys, when your parents bring food from home.

YES!
14. You, waiting for glucose after winning a competition for your house.

Oya na.
15. When your house wins the inter-house sports.

Turn Up!!!
16. When people start crying because their house lost.

Usually Yellow House people.

Daniel Orubo

May 18, 2016

Oldies

Africa, Glucose, Inter-house sports, Milo, Nigeria, Run, secondary school, sports
16 Things Every Nigerian Who Was A Prefect In Secondary School Will Remember

1. When you enter SS3 and it’s time for the school to choose prefects.

Please God, let them pick me.
2. You, if your juniors had to be the ones to vote for the prefects.

Ejoor vote for me.
3. You, at the badging ceremony.

Finally!
4. When the head girl and head boy start behaving like it’s only their own posts that matter.

All prefects matter.
5. When you got chapel prefect and you couldn’t stab service anymore.

Why me?
6. When you remember all the juniors who had been rude to you.

I will deal with you.
7. After you become a prefect and you send a junior and he says no.

Is this one mad?
8. When the whole school does something but only the prefects are being punished.

Wawu!
9. You and all the prefects after you’ve finished serving punishment for the school.

You will all learn!
10. When someone calls you supervisor instead of prefect.

P-R-E-F-E-C-T!
11. When you’re the food prefect and so everybody wants to be your friend.

Do I know you?!
12. When you thought being a prefect meant you could wake up late but you had to be up before the rest of the school.

Someone cannot sleep again!
13. When your mates that you didn’t even like start famzing you so that your power can rub off on them.

Don’t let the devil use you.
14. When you become a prefect and nobody is trying to use provisions to bribe you.

Why is my own different?
15. When you’re the labour prefect and the juniors don’t do their work so the principal asks you to do it.

Just know you’re dead.
16. When you’re the socials prefect so you’re only supposed to work once a week.

Chilling!

Odunayo

May 16, 2016

Oldies

Nigeria, Prefect, School, Secondary, secondary school
14 Things Every Nigerian Who Had A School Parent In Secondary School Will Get

1. When a senior asks to be your school parent.

Yes Lord!
2. When you find out what they really want.

Chai!
3. When it’s been one hour and your school parent has not come to save you yet.

Wow!
4. When a senior tells you to kneel down and you see your school parent coming.

Finally!
5. When your school parent releases you from punishment.

6. When seniors start acting nice to you because they have a crush on your school parent.

Continue please.
7. When you report the senior that beat you to your school parent and you realize they are friends.

Jisos!
8. When they make your school parent a senior prefect.

We stay winning!
9. When other juniors are being punished and you’re just there with your school parent like:

Can’t touch this.
10. When a senior tries to send you.

No vex.
11. When you see that senior that doesn’t care whether you have a school parent or not.

Abeg oh.
12. When your school parent repeats so they are still there to protect you.

Don’t judge me.
13. When your school parent finally graduates.

NOOOO!
14. How seniors appear when they know you don’t have a school parent again.

Chineke!

Daniel Orubo

May 12, 2016

Oldies

Africa, Nigeria, School Father, School Mother, School Parent, secondary school
16 Pictures Only People Who Attended Queens College Will Understand

1. Whenever you hear “pass on the torch”

…still brightly gleaming.
2. When you enter stealth mode to fap water from your dorm girls.

Epp me, Lord.
3. When you’re leaving dining hall and you hear “one ju” or “junior girl with the…”

Hay God!
4. You, when KC boys start arriving for Interhouse sports.

When you pretend to start stretching for calisthenics.
5. When you see a KC boy talking to one ISL girl.

Ugh! Do better.
6. Vivian Fowler girls looking at you and your squad like:

Stay pained.
7. Your face, whenever you see babes scaling fence.

Is it that deep?
8. Whenever you hear that Maty Obong or Mrs. Obi are coming.

Jisos!
9. “Obasa girls, dirty towels I can stand, but dirty pants I cannot stand. Whose pant is this?”

Don’t look at me.
10. When it’s time for Saturday morning inspection.

The worst.
11. When you hear that you’re a toilet worker instead of a dorm worker.

Who did I offend?
12. How dining hall looked every Sunday:

From Pap and akara to jollof rice.
13. You and your girls during dance, dance, dance.

Let us scatter the floor.
14. When you heard that school had cancelled Scruples.

NO! WHY?
15. You, the first time you caught two girls “lesbianing” together.

Chineke!
16. Whenever someone asks if you’re a QC old girl.

Proud OG! Co-written by Zikoko contributor, @Cyntheeya

Daniel Orubo

May 10, 2016

Oldies

Africa, Girls, Nigeria, QC, Queens College, secondary school, Yaba
16 Things Nigerians Who Attended Social Night In Secondary School Will Get

1. When the house master says social night won’t hold again.

Edakun sir.
2. When it’s social night and they lock you and your guys in the hostel.

God forbid bad thing.
3. You and your squad turning up in the mufti you snuck in.

Baddest guys.
4. When all the couples are grinding but your single ass is just there like:

See my life.
5. When you finally get to dance with your crush and a senior comes to chance you.

Don’t do this.
6. Social night at all-boys schools be like:

Let’s manage.
7. When your efforts are not being appreciated.

When you're giving a guy your best grinds during socials night and he whispers to you "why are you not dancing?" pic.twitter.com/T9UtIamyjO
— gm (@graxemeda) April 16, 2016

8. When the whole set shares one lipstick for that night.

We must slay by force.
9. Your face, when one junior boy tries to grind you.

Who is this one?
10. When you see girls coming to social night with their novels.

Behave yourself.
11. When all the girls are fronting and dancing with only themselves.

Is it fair?
12. When a guy is rocking the only babe that’s down to dance and he is wasting time.

Move na.
13. When someone turns off the light in the hall.

Jisos!
14. When the night starts getting sweet and you hear “all junior boys to your hostels.”

Hay God!
15. You, after dancing with the hottest senior in your school.

Winning!
16. When petty seniors punish you for getting grinds when they didn’t.

Is it my fault you’re a skrep?

Daniel Orubo

May 6, 2016

Oldies

Africa, Junior, Nigeria, secondary school, senior, Social Night, Socials
14 Things Only Nigerians Who Have Passed JAMB Will Relate To

1. When you told your friends that you’re going abroad for Uni but your father says you should go and pick JAMB form.

Oh God! Why me?
2. When you’re filing JAMB form with your parents and start writing “Theatre Ar…”

Jisos!
3. When your mother forces you to fill in Engineering/Law/Medicine as 1st and 2nd choice.

Epp me, God!
4. You and your guys entering JAMB lesson like:

Bad guys.
5. When you see your elders writing in the same JAMB centre as you.

My oga.
6. When JAMB gives you that useless calculator for Maths.

To use and do what?
7. When someone that has a different exam type is still copying you.

Are you normal?
8. JAMB and Nokia torchlight phones.

When you hear that ringtone, you know dubs have arrived.
9. When you hear that JAMB results are out.

Hay God!
10. When your classmate that paid for special centers still scores 130.

Good for you.
11. Your mother checking your JAMB result with you.

I’m not ready.
12. When you only had to write JAMB 3 times before passing.

I sabi book.
13. When you finally pass JAMB but remember you still have to pass Post JAMB.

Chai!
14. How old you feel when you hear that this is how they write JAMB now:

I’m old sha.

Daniel Orubo

May 4, 2016

Oldies

Africa, Exam, JAMB, Nigeria, secondary school, UTME
15 Things Only ISL Students Will Understand Easily

1. When somebody confuses your school with ISI

Take your time please. Don’t let the devil use you.
2. When principal is cracking his never ending dry jokes

OYIIIIII
3. When Mrs Bello starts not minding her business as usual

Please ma face your front. It’s not your concern.
4. When you see your seniors collecting grinds in the name of choreography

OSHEY BADDEST WE CAN SEE YOU UNO.
5. When on your birthday you have to buy BBQ for every one of your friends

Oh God. All these expenses.
6. And you know they will still bathe you with sand and water

Ungrateful elements.
7. When as a JSS1 student you can work in SS1 block

We may be in the same class but I am not your mate now.
8. When JSS2 and JSS3 or SS1 and SS2 students are fighting

*grabs popcorn* it is about to be real.
9. When you have secured a babe to dance with at the school dance

Let me teach you guys how this is done
10. When you get to dance with the most girls at the school dance

Call me the chicks man.
11. When you as a girl have been defending all the guys and don’t get a gift on valentines day

What is this life? What did I do to deserve this?
12. When you narrowly escaped death by flogging because you were in the toilet

I serve a living God.
13. When Mr Adeyemi tells you to write “I will never do ___again” 1,000 times

This must be child abuse.
14. When you realize Mr. Mbaso is the one to flog you

Tell my parents I love them. It has been real. Peace out.
15. When you get caught stabbing class but then you stab it again

Because you are a bad guy and education is never that serious.

Tobi Smith

April 30, 2016

Oldies

Experiences, ISL, Lagos, secondary school
18 Pictures Every Nigerian Who Has Done WAEC Will Relate To

1. You, a night before your first WAEC exam.

My body is ready.
2. When they send the most wicked teacher in school to invigilate.

We are in trouble.
3. When they arrange everybody in alphabetical order and take you away from your squad.

Is it even fair?
4. When you see someone with ‘Key Points’ in the exam hall.

See that one.
5. When the only section of the theory you know is the part meant for Ghana.

Hay God! I’m in the wrong country.
6. When they repeat the Past Questions year you crammed.

Winning!
7. When a teacher enters the hall and starts dictating answers to the OBJ.

Me, I can’t carry last.
8. How you enter school when you’re the only one with expo:

As a boss!
9. When the external invigilator catches you trying to ask your friend for number 4.

Jisos!
10. When you tell someone the answer to number 1 and they ask “numbers 2 to 40?”

Are you mad?
11. When you go to the toilet during an exam and see textbooks there.

Na wa oh!
12. How people that studied only dubs look when it doesn’t come out:

Jehovah!
13. When the external invigilator falls asleep after eating.

The best.
14. When Food and Nutrition students finish their practical.

Let us epp.
15. You, after you wrote your last paper.

BYE, HATERS!!!
16. You, trying to read for NECO after you know you cleared WAEC.

No time, biko.
17. When you hear that result is out.

God, please don’t sly me.
18. You, coming out of the principal’s office after seeing that you passed.

My enemies have been shamed.

Daniel Orubo

April 27, 2016

Oldies

Africa, Nigeria, secondary school, waec, West Africa
17 Pictures You’ll Understand If You Ever Had A Nigerian Secondary School Teacher

1. When you greet them and they ask “what’s good about the morning?”

Ah! No vex.
2. When they write “see me” on your assignment.

Oh God! What did I do again?
3. How you feel when you enter the teachers’ staff room:

Chai! Who sent me message?
4. When they tell you to buy cane and bring to school.

Is this even fair?
5. When they are flogging you and they say “if you touch it, I’ll start again.”

Please epp me.
6. When they start cleaning the board and you tell them you haven’t finished copying it.

Hian! Take it easy.
7. When that teacher that hates you tries to be nice to you on visiting day.

Save it.
8. When your favorite teacher bad mouths you to your parents on open day.

Wow. Is it like that?
9. When they wait for their period to be over before they ask “any questions?”

Better carry your load and go.
10. When they hear that your next class is a free period.

Ugh! Just leave us.
11. When they tell the class captain to write names of noise makers and they don’t collect it.

Look at God!
12. When they ask a question and ignore all your classmates with their hands up and pick you.

Why are you asking me? Did I raise my hand?
13. How they set questions:

Jisos!
14. When they wish you good luck before an exam.

See this devil.
15. When they look at your script during a test and shake their head.

Hay God! Should I just start again?
16. How they mark your exam:

How Nigerian teachers mark your exam when they want to deal with you: pic.twitter.com/Yb506Ep3hF
— Wale Lawal (@WalleLawal) December 6, 2014

17. When you get everything in your exam but they still keep that 1 mark for themselves.

Na wa! Is it that 1 mark you will eat at home?

Daniel Orubo

April 21, 2016

Oldies

Africa, High School, Junior, Nigeria, School, secondary school, senior, Teacher