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  • #EndSARS: What Happened At The Panels Set Up Across The Country?

    On October 16, 2020, the National Economic Council recommended that the 36 states of the federation set up judicial panels of inquiry to investigate cases of police brutality by members of the disbanded Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS). Since then, state governments have established judicial panels to investigate cases of police brutality within their states.

    1. ABIA STATE

    On October 23, the Governor of Abia State, Okezie Ikpeazu, inaugurated a 17-man judicial panel of inquiry to investigate allegations of extrajudicial killings and brutality by security agents in the state. The chairman of the panel was Justice Sunday Imo, who was a retired Chief Judge of Abia State.

    The Governor said that the panel should investigate killings of extrajudicial killings by the men and members of the Police Force and those of other security agencies, from 2015 to date; investigate all forms of police brutality, extortion and intimidation from 2015 to date; ascertain the immediate and remote causes of #EndSARS protest and other grievances associated with it.

    The Governor mandated the panel to submit its report within 12 weeks. On July 6, the Abia State Judicial panel of inquiry submitted its 5-volume reports to the Governor of Abia State. The panel recommended over #511 million as compensation to victims of police brutality. Justice Imo declared that the panel received 86 petitions and 46 went through full hearing while the remaining were struck out.

    2. ADAMAWA STATE

    On October 20, Governor Ahmadu Umaru Fintiri Adamawa state approved the establishment of the eleven-member judicial panel to look into the alleged brutality by the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in Adamawa State.

    The Judicial Panel of Inquiry was headed by Justice Adamu Hobon (Rtd), and members of the panel constituted members of the judiciary, civil society organisations, security, youth and religious and student organisations.

    The panel’s job was to receive and investigate complaints on police brutality or related extrajudicial killings, evaluate evidence and establish the nature of the abuses. The panel was also to establish whether there are people wrongly charged with crimes currently in custody, find out the reasons why they are in custody, find out whether they have been arraigned in court and establish how many have died in custody.

    3. AKWA IBOM STATE

    On October 20, the Akwa Ibom State Government set up a judicial panel to investigate complaints of police brutality, human rights violations and extrajudicial killings in Akwa Ibom state.

    The panel was created after the State Executive Council meeting and was headed by Justice Ifiok Ukana (Rtd) and was made up of other youth representatives, student leaders, and other members from the Ministry of Justice, human rights commission and civil society organisations.

    The panel received 143 petitions, and 28 were about extrajudicial killings and complete disappearance of suspects and death of persons in custody and 22 showed neglected litigations. 85 cases were on human rights cases and over 380 people testified at the panel. The panel submitted a report on 23rd July and its report was in four volumes.

    3. ANAMBRA STATE

    On October 16, 2020, the Anambra State Governor, Willie Obiano, set up a judicial panel of inquiry to investigate the allegations of human rights abuses by the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in the state. The panel was headed by retired Justice V.N Umeh, and it was made up of 20 members. The panel was expected to submit its report within 30 days.

    On February 13, 2021, five youth members of the judicial panel of inquiry resigned, claiming that the Anambra State Government had totally ignored the panel and the government had no regard for the victims of human rights violations, police brutality, extortion and extrajudicial killings in the state. The resigning members claimed that infamous SARS units like the Special Anti-Robbery Squad, Awkuzu and numerous other police outfits were still operating in the state.

    The police officers of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad shunned the invitations of the Anambra State Judicial Panel, even though many petitioners complained of police brutality.

    4. BAUCHI STATE

    On October 28, 2020, the Bauchi State Governor, Bala Mohammed, inaugurated a 17-man panel of inquiry into alleged human rights violations by officers of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad of the Nigerian Police Force. At the inauguration, the governor stated that the panel was set up to address the violation of citizens’ rights in the state by receiving complaints and petitions from the public, identifying the culprits and proffering recommendations to the government.

    The panel was headed by Justice Habibu Idris and the panel was mandated to submit its report within six months.

    5. BAYELSA STATE

    On October 21, 2020, the Governor of Bayelsa State, Duoye Diri, constituted a judicial panel of inquiry through a state radio broadcast. The Bayelsa State Government set up the panel in response to the demands of the #EndSARS protesters in the state.

    The Bayelsa State panel of Inquiry was headed by Retired Justice Y.B. Ogola and the panel were given six months to complete its assignment.

    The panel received 50 petitions and it recommended the prosecution of 11 police officers, the demotion of four police officers and the demotion of one police officer. The panel also awarded ₦21 billion as compensation to the victims of police brutality in the state. Eight cases were struck out at the panel and two were adjourned.

    6. BENUE STATE

    On October 21, 2020, the Benue State Government set up a judicial panel of inquiry to investigate cases of human rights violations, police brutality and extrajudicial killings in the state. The panel was headed by Justice Adam Onum, and the governor declared that the panel was to submit its report within six months.

    The panel entertained many petitions including that of a 34-year old man, Terfa Gundu, who alleged that the police poured petrol on him.

    The panel has not submitted its report to the Benue State Governor.

    7. BORNO STATE

    Borno state did not set up a judicial panel of inquiry in the state. Officials of the state claimed there were no cases of police brutality in the state.

    8. CROSS RIVER STATE

    On October 22, 2020, the Cross River State Government set up a judicial panel of inquiry to investigate the allegations of police brutality by members of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad. The panel was headed by Hon. Justice Michael Edem.

    However, just a few days after the composition of the panel, members of the civil society in Cross River State complained about the composition of the panel, stating that the panel was not diverse enough. Many observers concluded that the panel was cherry-picked and the selection process was not transparent.

    On November 11, 2020, the Cross River State panel adjourned due to “technicalities” about whether the panel had the power to investigate the police. The panel had received 39 petitions by the time it adjourned.

    9. DELTA STATE

    On October 19, 2020, the Delta State government formally inaugurated an eight-member panel of inquiry to investigate the allegations of police brutality and extra-judicial killings in the state. The panel was headed by Justice Celestina Ogisi (Rtd) and Omamuzo Erebe was the panel’s secretary.

    On July 9, 2021, the Governor of Delta State, Sen. (Dr) Ifeanyi Okowa received the panel’s report. The Governor said that the Delta State Government will consider and implement the decisions of the panel, and that the state would do its best to support victims of police brutality and extra-judicial killings in the state.

    The Delta State judicial panel of Inquiry received 86 petitions and it heard 49 cases while 37 were struck out. The panel recommended the payment of compensation to victims of police brutality in the state.

    However, some human rights activists in Delta State claim that the Delta State government has not implemented the report and that there would be a procession to mark the one year anniversary of the #EndSARS protests if the government did not implement the report.

    10.  EBONYI STATE

    On October 20, 2020, the Ebonyi State government set up an eight-member judicial panel of inquiry against police brutality, extra-judicial killings and human rights abuses in the state. The panel was headed by Justice Alloy Nwankwo.

    The panel received 71 petitions and recommended the payment of ₦189 million to victims of extrajudicial killings in the state. The chairman of the panel also stated that security agencies involved in extrajudicial killings in the state were recommended for sanctions.

    11.  EDO STATE

    On October 19, 2020, the Edo State government set up a 12-man judicial panel of inquiry to receive complaints from the public about police brutality in the state and to recommend measures for compensation of victims of police brutality in the state. The panel was given 90 days to complete its assignment and the chairperson of the panel was Hon. Justice Ada Ehigiamusoe.

    After nine months, the Edo State Judicial Panel of Inquiry on Police Brutality submitted its report. The panel received 170 petitions, and it recommended the payment of compensation to the victims of police brutality in the state.

    12.  EKITI STATE

    On October 19, 2020, the Ekiti State government set up a 10-member judicial panel to look into cases of police brutality and extrajudicial killings in the state. The panel was headed by Justice Cornelius Akintayo.

    Three months after the panel was set up, the panel recommended over ₦1.5 million as compensation to six petitioners, including four policemen whose properties were violated during the #EndSARS protests.

    In March 2021, the Ekiti State government presented ₦7.4 million to victims of police brutality in Ekiti State, following the recommendations of the Ekiti State Judicial Panel on Police Brutality.

    The Ekiti State government formally received the report of the panel, and it promised to pay another ₦13.8 million to 28 victims of police brutality in the state. The Governor also promised to implement the recommendations of the Ekiti State panel Judicial Panel of Inquiry into allegations of human rights abuses by police officers in the state.

    EndSARS protesters occupy Lagos State House of Assembly, Alausa, Ikeja, Lagos, Nigeria on Friday, October 9, 2020. The protesters are calling for the scrapping of police unit, known as Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) over the squads incessant harassment and brutality of innocent Nigerians. (Photo by Adekunle Ajayi/NurPhoto via Getty Images)

    13.  ENUGU STATE

    On October 27, 2020, the Governor of Enugu State, Ifeanyi Ugwuanyi, constituted a nine-member Administrative Panel of Inquiry to look into cases of police brutality in the state. The panel was headed by Justice Frederick Obieze and it was mandated to conclude and submit its report within sixty days.

    In March 2021, the panel submitted its report to the Enugu State Governor, and the governor stated that the government would implement the recommendations of the panel.

    14.  GOMBE STATE

    On 31 October 2020, the Gombe State Governor, Inuwa Yahaya, inaugurated an 11-member commission to investigate cases of police brutality by members of the disbanded Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in the state.

    As of November 2020, the Commission claimed that it had not received any petition yet.

    15.  IMO STATE

    On October 19, 2020, the Imo State Governor, Hope Uzodinma, set up a 17-member Judicial Commission to investigate and make recommendations on cases of human rights violations and extra-judicial killings by members of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in the state. The panel was headed by Justice Florence Duruoha-Igwe.

    In June 2021, the Imo State government received the report of the panel of the Judicial Commission on Police Brutality and Related Matters and the commission recommended that ₦770 million should be paid as compensation to victims of police brutality in the state.

    On receiving the report, the Governor stated that the report would effectively guide the state government in tackling issues related to police brutality.

    16.  JIGAWA STATE

    Jigawa State did not set up a Judicial Panel of Inquiry into human rights abuses by members of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in the state.

    17.  KADUNA STATE

    On October 19, 2020, the Kaduna State government inaugurated a judicial panel to investigate human rights violations and police brutality in the state. The panel was headed by Justice David Wyom.

    The panel held its inaugural meeting in December, 2020, and it stated that it had received a total of 28 petitions from the public as at then.

    In June 2021, nine months after its inauguration, the panel concluded its public hearing on police brutality in the state, stating that it entertained 69 petitions throughout the period it sat.

    18.  KANO STATE

    Kano State did not set up a Judicial Panel of Inquiry into human rights abuses by members of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in the state.

    19.  KATSINA STATE

    The Kaduna State Judicial Panel of Inquiry received 61 petitions related to police brutality, human rights abuses and extrajudicial killings by members of the disbanded Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS).

    The panel was headed by Justice Abbas Bawale and it commenced hearings on November 23, 2020. Most of the petitions to the panel came from the Funtua zone of the state. Other petitions came from the Daura and Katsina zones of the state.

    20.  KEBBI STATE

    Kebbi State did not set up a Judicial Panel of Inquiry into human rights abuses by members of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in the state.

    21.  KOGI STATE

    The Kogi State Governor inaugurated a 10-member panel of enquiry consisting of personnel from the police, State Security Service, Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps (NSCDC), National Human Rights Commission (NHRC), Ministry of Justice and the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA). The Kogi State government codenamed the panel Human Rights Special Intervention Group (HRSIG).

    The chairman of the panel was Ibrahim Alhassan. He claimed that the panel received six petitions and that one of the petitioners claimed that his cow was detained in a police station since 2016.

    The Kogi State Human Rights Special Investigation Group has not released a report of its panel hearings.

    22.  KWARA STATE

    On October 20, 2020, the Kwara State government set up a 10-man judicial panel to look into the complaints of police brutality in the state. The panel was set up to investigate complaints of human rights abuses and extra-judicial killings by the #EndSARS protesters.

    Justice Tunde Garba was announced as the chairman of the panel and the panel included representatives of the civil society organisations, youths, human rights organisations, the state Ministry of Justice.

    In February 2021, the Kwara State Government received a three-volume report of the panel and he promised to implement the recommendations of the committee.

    23.  LAGOS STATE

    On October 19, 2020, the Lagos State Governor, Babajide Sanwo-Olu inaugurated a 8-man Judicial Panel of Inquiry to investigate the alleged cases of police brutality and extrajudicial killings in Lagos State. The panel was headed by Justice Doris Okuwobi and the two youth representatives on the panel were Rinu Oduala and Majekodunmi Temitope.

    The panel was mandated to six months and its job was to determine the causes of police brutality in the state, investigate the cases of police brutality, recommend compensations for the victims of police brutality and recommend the prosecution of culpable SARS officers.

    The Lagos Panel received 230 petitions and it awarded ₦262 million to 19 petitioners,  including to one Charles Otoo, a petitioner who claimed that he was shot by police officers the Ojodu Police Division on the evening October 21, 2020.

    At the Lagos Panel, the Nigerian Army admitted to firing live rounds at “hoodlums” around the Lekki toll-gate protest ground. The panel has promised to submit its report to the Lagos State Governor very soon.

    24.  NASARAWA STATE

    On October 27, 2020, the Nasarawa State Judicial Panel of Inquiry commenced its judicial hearings. The panel was headed by Justice Badamasi Maina (Rtd) and he told members of the commission to approach the commission with their complaints on police brutality by SARS officers in the state.

    On 29 April 2021, the Nasarawa Panel submitted its report and it recommended ₦480 million as compensation for victims of police brutality in the state.

    25.  NIGER STATE

    On 23rd October 2020, Governor Abubakar Bello of Niger State inaugurated a 14-man judicial panel of inquiry to investigate cases of police brutality and other cases of extrajudicial killings by the disbanded Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS). The chairman of the panel was Ishaku Usman and the secretary of the panel was Abdulrahim Tariq.

    As of January 2021, the panel had concluded its hearings and the panel received 18 petitions. The Niger State Judicial Panel of Inquiry has not submitted its report of the panel hearings.

    26.  OGUN STATE

    On 17th October 2020, the Ogun State Governor, Dapo Abiodun, set up a Judicial Panel of Investigation to investigate cases of police brutality and extrajudicial killings in Ogun State. The Governor appointed Justice Solomon Olugbemi (rtd) as the Chairman of the Judicial Panel.

    The Ogun State government also set up a Victims’ Support Fund of ₦50 million to enable payment of monetary compensation to deserving victims. The Governor also promised that a forensic laboratory will be set up to aid and support police investigations and crime scene management.

    The Governor of Ogun State also announced the setting up of the Ogun State will be establishing a Forensic Laboratory to support police investigations and crime scene management.

    On July 10, 2021, the Ogun State Judicial Panel of Investigation on Police Brutality and Extra-Judicial Killings submitted its report to the state governor, Dapo Abiodun. The Governor recommended over ₦218 million as compensation to 42 victims and families. The panel made recommendations for the investigation and prosecution of deterrent police officers.

    27.  ONDO STATE

    On 19th October 2021, the Ondo State Governor approved the constitution of a Judicial Panel of Inquiry against the alleged illegal activities of the officers of the Nigeria Police Force in Ondo State. The Chairperson of the panel was Hon. Justice Salisu Adesola Sidiq (rtd), and the panel was given six months to complete its assignment.

    The Ondo State Judicial Panel recommended ₦755 million for the compensation of the victims of police brutality and human rights violation by the police in Ondo State.

    The panel received 77 petitions, out of which 14 were criminal matters and 63 were civil cases.

    28.  OSUN STATE

    On October 23, 2020, the Osun State Governor inaugurated a judicial panel of inquiry to investigate the human rights abuses by disbanded members of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS). The panel was chaired by Akin Oladimeji, a retired judge of the state high court.

    On August 5, 2021, the Osun State Governor received a report of the Judicial Panel, and he promised that the government will implement the recommendations of the panel.

    For a long time, the report of the Osun State panel remained inconclusive. Seven out of the 13 members of the panel disowned a report of the panel allegedly submitted to the governor by other members of the panel.

    29.  OYO STATE

    On November 10, 2020, the Oyo State Government inaugurated a Judicial Panel of Inquiry to investigate cases of extrajudicial killings and police brutality in Oyo State. The panel was headed by Justice Bolajoko Adeniyi and the panel had eleven members.

    On July 14, 2021, the Oyo State Judicial Panel concluded its panel hearings. The panel received 163 petitions and the panel promised that it would submit its recommendations.

    30.  PLATEAU STATE

    On 17 November 2020, Plateau State Governor Simon Bako set up the Plateau State Judicial Panel of Inquiry to look into police brutality and extrajudicial killings in the state.

    The panel was headed by Justice Philomina Lot and the panel was given six months to complete the assignment.

    31.  RIVERS STATE

    On November 24, 2020, the Rivers State Governor, Nyesom Wike, inaugurated a Judicial Panel of Inquiry to look into the cases of police brutality by operatives of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in Rivers State.

    The panel was headed by Justice Chukwunenye I. Uriri (Rtd) and the panel’s job was to identify victims of police brutality in Rivers State and recommend punishments for perpetrators of police brutality in the state.

    On 19 February 2021, the Rivers State Governor received the panel’s report  and he said the state’s panel received 190 petitions. Governor Wolf said the state would produce a white paper and present it to the Inspector General of Police (IGP).

    32.  SOKOTO STATE

    Sokoto State did not set up an #EndSARS Judicial Panel of Inquiry.

    33.  TARABA STATE

    On October 22, 2020, the Taraba State Governor, Darius Ishaku, set up a 10-man Judicial Panel of Inquiry and Restitution for victims of police brutality and extrajudicial killings by members of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS) in the state.

    The panel was headed by Justice Christopher Awubra and it said it had received 11 petitions by November 9, 2020.

    On 17 May, 2021, the Taraba State Judicial Panel concluded its hearings but no compensation was awarded to any individual. The panek received 34 petitions throughout the times that it sat.

    34.  YOBE STATE

    Yobe State did not set up an #EndSARS Judicial Panel of Inquiry.

    35.  ZAMFARA STATE

    Zamfara State did not set up an #EndSARS Judicial Panel of Inquiry.

    Doyin Olagunju

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  • A Week In The Life: The Unemployed Caterer Cooking Up Big Dreams

    “A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

    The subject of today’s “A Week In The Life” is a 24-year-old caterer who’s currently out of a job. He talks about how he lost his old job, losing his friend in the #EndSARS protest, the frustrations of unemployment and his plans for the future.

    MONDAY:

    I can’t breathe. 

    And to make things worse, my inhaler is empty. My chest is tight, and I feel like tearing my heart out. I can’t breathe. 

    Thankfully, my alarm wakes me up. I check my phone and it says 5 a.m. I’m having nightmares again. Normally, when I wake up by this time, I’d start preparing for work. However, after the incident of last week, I no longer have a job to go to. 

    My routine was: wake up, say my prayers, take a bath, brush and dash for work so that I could resume for 6:30 a.m. Every week, I’d work from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. on Mondays to Saturdays. This time last week, I was excited about the possibilities of working in a kitchen — I was looking to learn discipline, how to make the taste of food consistent and all the new cooking methods. 

    Sigh.

    It all started on Wednesday or Thursday morning last week. I was at work cooking in a closed space with only a fan and an extractor when I had my asthma crisis. It was still morning, so I hadn’t started cooking deep. I don’t remember how I survived. The last time I had this type of crisis was when I was a child. I remember feeling a pinching pain and wanting to tear my heart out. I don’t remember how my inhaler finished. I could have sworn that I used it the night before and even shook the bottle to confirm that it still had “air” inside. 

    I vaguely remember my brother dashing down and taking me to a nearby pharmacy with a sympathetic pharmacist and overpriced medicines. My boss was so scared by the incident that he called his boss who told me to take some time off. The next two days, I was informed not to resume. They told me that I shouldn’t come back because it was unhealthy for an asthmatic patient to be working under their kitchen conditions. 

    It’s been almost a week, and I still have my alarm set for 5 a.m. My body needs some time to adjust to the new reality. Until then, I’m going to pray and maybe watch some anime. I’m not in any hurry.

    TUESDAY:

    I’m thinking about the recent #EndSARS protests today. Truth be told, I’m usually the first person you’ll see at these things. I’m that guy who carries chest and protests for people. Last year I was in a protest in my school where students were killed, and because I witnessed those deaths, I struggled to join in the EndSARS protest.

    The fear of not wanting to die can make me come off as a coward, but I’ve lost a lot of people. And believe me, when you go, people will only miss you for a bit before they move on. They’ll remember you on some days, but that’s the limit — with time, dead people become forgotten history. If I die today, I want to be remembered for generations. I don’t want to be someone that you don’t know his name when you’re remembering the deaths of the 2020 protest. I don’t want to be part of “many people died.” 

    That fear didn’t allow me to join the protest. I was going out one day and saw some protesters. I joined and walked with them for 5-10 mins before boarding a bus to my destination. Not up to an hour after I left, I heard there was a shooting there. 

    The fear just came back again. Like this is what I was saying. There was also a shooting in Ebute Metta where they killed an old friend of mine. It was sad because he wasn’t a protester. He was just a casual observer working with the LNSC, and a stray bullet hit him. I only thought about him for two days before moving on with my life. I  really don’t blame anyone that doesn’t go out. 

    We want Nigeria to be a better place, but there are many forces kicking against it. I don’t even have fancy dreams, I just want to be the best dad for my kids. Fighting for this country is part of the process but if I’m dead, how do I even father the children I’m fighting for? 

    WEDNESDAY:

    This period of unemployment has made me happier because I’ve been able to reflect. I’ve realised that you’re alone at the end of the day. You were born alone, and you have to run your race alone.

    Before I started the job I lost, I was always busy. I was catering for one event or another and the jobs were back to back, so I didn’t have time to breathe. But Corona scattered plans, and everything paused. Then I had to get a job. Now that I’m unemployed without a business to fall back on, everything is boring. I can’t complain. If I do, it’ll be like I’m rushing too much. Nobody understands that I don’t want to be a liability to other people. I’m willing to survive by doing other things — I recently started a courier service in Lagos where I help people transport goods from point A to B.

    I see my peers and what they’re trying to do, and I’m just there sleeping and waking up. It’s easy to feel like I’ll soon be left behind. This period has given me time to evaluate and evolve. I’ve realised that everyone experiences times like this. Truth be told, I’ve experienced frustration, boredom and depression. But I’ve made a conscious decision to get out. Something as little as gratitude has been helpful for me. 

    I’ve gone from having my Monday to Saturday occupied to not having anything to do. I’ve gone from my mum saying: “You’re never at home,” “How’s work?” to her saying I haven’t done house chores. 

    It’s all good though. What matters is that I’m in a good place, for now. 

    THURSDAY:

    I’m hopeful that I’ll get another job. A few people I worked for have promised me jobs at the end of the year. I’ve also been trying to follow up on them. Check-ins here and there. In the meantime, I’m trying to survive here and there. Today, I realised that I haven’t even opened my school books since protests and Corona started. Not because I don’t want to but because I wish not to. I’m not in that space mentally, and I have a weird relationship with school.

    I attended two schools (but I didn’t finish) before attending this one. If I had certificates from one of them, shebi I’d have used it for work during this period. The only thing I have to show is my leaving school certificate. There are many jobs I feel I’m capable of but there’s no certificate to back up my claims. I have three years of an Engineering programme at a university, two years of the same Engineering program at a college of technology. In the past when I tried to apply to Engineering companies, they took me in as a labourer. I’m not saying I’m better than them, but I felt out of place — like an oddball. 

    I’m going to get my degree because I think I’ve suffered enough. When a soldier goes to war, he gets a medal of valour. My certificate is going to be my reward for what I’ve gone through. My catering will still be at the forefront, but the degree would be a useful addition; a safety net for times like this. 

    Compared to my mates, I haven’t lived. I want to travel. I want to go hiking, biking, mountain climbing. I want to live a stable life for my kids. Most importantly,  I just want to live while I still have that crazy, youthful energy.

    Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

    Hassan Yahaya

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  • Music Is Playing A Huge Role In These #EndSARS Protests

    Citizen is a column that explains how the government’s policies fucks citizens and how we can unfuck ourselves.

    Today is the seventh day of the nationwide #EndSARS protests as Nigerians march peacefully against police brutality. So much has happened in these past seven days. You can check out all the stories and updates in our carefully curated EndSARS stack.

    Find more information on the EndSARS Movement here

    Unsurprisingly though, a major driving force for the success of these protests has been music. Being a universal language during these protests, music has brought Nigerians together in unison to speak against police brutality, and sometimes, just to have fun.

    Check out this video from Enugu as protesters sing and march:

    Davido’s FEM seems to be a banger during these protests. Maybe this video will help you understand a bit better.

    https://twitter.com/bleckpenta/status/1315956133513789440?s=21

    On October 9th in Lagos, protesters knelt and sang the national anthem together.

    And today, they sang it again under the rain

    One song that seems to have been heard everywhere is the call and response song, “How Many People SARS Go Kill”

    Even Nigerians in London are singing “Nigeria jagajaga”

    If you’ve gone through some form of military training or another, or even NYSC, this song will sound familiar to you:

    For now, the protests continue and the music echoes. Hopefully the government can hear our struggles and take actual measures to put an end to police brutality.

    We ranked some of the best protest anthems here. Check it out!

    We hope you’ve learned a thing or two about how to unfuck yourself when the Nigerian government moves mad. Check back every weekday for more Zikoko Citizen explainers.

    David Odunlami

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  • We Ranked All Your Favourite Protest Anthems

    For the past seven days Nigeria has had it’s biggest national scale protest since 1993.  The #EndSARS protest is a peaceful but powerful movement against police brutality in Nigeria, both generally, and specifically by the Special Anti-Robbery Squad of the Nigerian Police.

    In these marches, music is an important tool to keep the people going. This article ranks some of the most popular songs that would keep Nigerians going during protests.

    Note: Some songs on this list don’t have an outright “protest” message. They’re here as “ginger” songs to keep the people going.

    8. 2Face – No Shaking

    My guy na your eye go sharpen because e be like say e don dey happen. Is it really…happening?

    7. Wande Coal – Bumper to Bumper

    This one is here for the nostalgia. When people are getting tired during these marches, just queue this song. You’ll see movement.

    6. Burna Boy – Anybody

    This one is here because of the violence. You know the song, you know the lyrics, so you can see how this could work in a protest, right?

    5. 2Face- For Instance

    2Face talks about how many of the things Nigerians face are swept under the carpet. Someone tell 2Face that we’re not taking that shit from the government anymore.

    4. Falz – This Is Nigeria

    Falz has been a loud and resounding voice for Nigerians during these protests. When he released this song two years ago as an adaptation of Donald Golver’s “This Is America”, it felt like he had captured the entire state of Nigeria in one song. It still feels like that today.

    3. African China – Crisis

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22g0kfW4auc

    A song that talks about government fuck ups? Please increase the volume.

    2. Fela Kuti – Beasts of No Nation

    If you’re going on one of those long walks, and you have twenty-eight minutes to spare, this song is perfect. This list would never be complete without at least one Fela song. He would be proud of us.

    1. African China- Mr President

    This song is number one because we’re currently protesting against police brutality. There are so many things African China said in this 2006 song that are still true in today’s Nigerian society, fourteen years later. Oh..and it’s an absolute jam.

    David Odunlami

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  • Abuja Protester: The Police Threw Hot Water And Tear Gas Canisters At Us

    The Nigerian youths have been at the forefront of the #EndSARS protest. From all over the country, we have protesters enduring all sorts of harassment from the police force. From being poured hot water and tear gas to having bullets shot at them, they have seen it all. Today, I spoke to Nkeiru, a protester in Abuja to recount what the past few days of protest have been like.

    Day 1 of the Abuja protest.

    On Friday, 9th of October, we got ready to protest. We headed out to millennium park. I met people there ready to protest. I have a large following on twitter so a lot of people kept sending me DMs on where the location for the Abuja protest is. We walked from millennium park through Transcorp, NCC, hoping to get to the secretariat. When we got to Abia House, we got blocked by five police vans. Some police officers came down and started throwing canister of tear gas at us. Everyone started running. 

    I jumped the fence into Junkyard. Some people were running into Statement Hotel and Abia house. Some even ran as far back as Berger and Bannex. Everyone scattered and that ended day 1 of the protest.

    Nkeiru at the Friday protest

    Day 2 of the Abuja protest

    On Saturday, 10th of October, we met at Berger roundabout. From there we marched to Banex and then all the way to Unity fountain. People really turn up for this march. When we got to the headquarters, we sat on the floor, demanding to see the IGP. We sat for over 4 hours waiting for him to come.  Madam Aisha Yesufu was with us. The police asked us to leave that the IGP wasn’t around but we insisted that we would wait for him. 

    There was a ready supply of food, water and first aid in case of an emergency. 

    A policewoman came to talk to us repeatedly asking us to go home but we stood our ground. The police waited until it was dark, like around 6:30 pm – 7:00 pm next thing we knew, they started throwing canisters of tear gas at us. The 100 plus people who came for the protest started running for their lives. It was like a mini-stampede. 

    Our cars that were parked opposite the road were vandalised. They slashed the tyres, broke the windscreens and windows. The owners had to find a way to fix their tyres before going home. That was how the protest ended. 

    Nkeiru at the Saturday protest

    Day 3 of the Abuja Protest

    On Sunday, 11th of October, we met at Unity fountain to march to the police headquarters. When we got to Women Affairs, the police stopped us and started throwing tear gas and hot water at us. It got me thinking about all the fires that the Nigerian fire service did not put out because of lack of water and how easily they seem to have this “scarce” resources available now that youths are protesting for their rights. 

    A lot of people just sat down on the floor that if it’s just water, they should pour it on them. From pouring water on us, they started throwing teargas again. They caught some of my friends and beat them up. 

    We went back to Maitaima roundabout and regrouped again with a larger crowd. We went back the second time and they chased us back again with hot water. They chased us as far as Unity fountain from the Ministry of Women affairs.

    This was when Davido joined us and he came with the longest convey I’ve ever seen in my life. Everyone followed Davido’s convey as it had over 200 cars. We were headed for the police quarters. When we got there, Davido spoke to them and they released everyone in their custody.  

    The police told Davido that they have called off the SARS unit and us protesting is against the law. Davido told them that if any of us encounters any SARS office, we will back and that was how everyone went home. 

    The fight is not over until we #EndSARS.

    Nkeiru at the Sunday protest
    How to unfuck yourselves from the Nigerian Government.

    Eris Ekanem

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  • Some Of The Most Powerful Pictures From The #EndSARS Protests

    We’re in the sixth day of the peaceful #EndSARS protest, which has gone from being a national event to an international one. Over the course of the protest, some fire pictures have been shared across the internet. On this article, we’ll share some of the ones we absolutely love.

    Note: We don’t own, or take credit for any of these pictures. We’re simply just sharing them

    Aisha Yesufu, a warrior.
    Savvy Rinu, a leader
    Protesters holding hands in front of the tollgate at Lekki
    Fuck the police.
    Comedian, Mr Macaroni sleeping on the streets, in protest.
    The message is simple. The flag is flying high.
    Wizkid joining the protests from London
    End SARS. Lagos, Nigeria.
    We are Nigeria.
    Protesters demonstrating in Lagos.
    Davido kneeling in front of the police in Abuja
    Stop hurting the youth.
    Even the gods are tired.
    As a police officer walks by, protesters raise their voices.
    Protesting in front of a police station? Why not.
    Enough said.
    The boys raise their voices.
    We raise our hands. We raise our voices.
    Lagos roads blocked with protesters

    We hope you’ve learned a thing or two about how to unfuck yourself when the Nigerian government moves mad. Check back every weekday for more Zikoko Citizen explainers.

    Credits: Yusuf Sanni

    Find more information on the EndSARS Movement here

    David Odunlami

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  • We Asked Some Older People What They Think About The #EndSARS Movement

    The #EndSARS peaceful protests have been going on for five days across the country and across the world. Nigerians are making demands to end the body that inflicts so much brutality on innocent citizens.

    Most of people involved in the protests are young, and it’s because they’re the most affected by SARS, but we decided to ask the older people what they think about the movement.

    1. Tola, early 60s

    Well, I’m a citizen of Nigeria, so I believe in the right to peacefully protest. The thing is, in situations like these, hoodlums take over and it gets really violent and that’s what I’m afraid of. You might not believe me, but SARS has stopped me a few times. I look younger than my age. They’d ask me who owns the car and I’d tell them but it has never gotten aggressive. I imagine that it’s worse for young people. These people don’t know that things have changed and young people make money in much easier ways than we used to in our time so they’ll probably be angry if they saw a young guy with a car, looking nice.

    The thing with the military and armed forces in Nigeria is that they all need one form of reform or another. If we’re trying to say “End SARS”, we should also probably say “End police” or “End the military”. Recently I heard that some soldiers raped a girl at a road block in Ondo State. We can’t say “End the military”. SARS definitely needs to be reformed and reoriented, and not ended, just like many other military bodies in Nigeria.

    2. Biola, 53

    It’s with this outbreak I found out that SARS harasses, exploits and kills young people. I thought they were this special unit that is effective in covet operations and taking down criminals and people associated with criminals. I was shocked when my daughter told me about them and how they operate. Has it now become a crime to be young in Nigeria?

    Amidst all of this though, what is at the top of my mind is that if this thing is so serious, why is the media not covering it? Are they being told not to talk about it?

    3. Peter, 57

    I understand what these young people are suffering. In 1994, shortly before I got married, I had my own experience with SARS. It wasn’t so pleasant. Moving around, I’ve also seen some boys get harassed, but I thought it was just extortion. I didn’t know they were killing people as well. That’s terrible.

    4. Uche, 58

    I heard about it but it’s not really my business. If they want to protest, they should protest. Me I just came back from church and all that’s on my mind is what I’m going to eat.

    5. Thomas, 58

    It is sheer arrogance, insanity, and power-drunkenness that will make you kill a fellow human being. I know that when they were introduced, SARS was instrumental in curbing the endemic that was prevalent at the time. Kudos to them for that. But over the years, they’ve grown wings. They think they’re gods now. And it’s because they have the power to detain, investigate and prosecute people. Yahoo yahoo is a crime, yes. But are the punishments not specified in our penal codes?

    My take? Don’t end SARS, reform it. The scrapping of SARS at this time will create a flourishing market for cybercrime operators. Being a very technical and specialized crime, it will require the deployment of new officers that would have to be properly trained in this field of crime detection. If the government decides to scrap SARS, those who are going to perform their functions, will they not be Nigerians? For as long as those who will take over from SARS will be Nigerians, it is delusional to expect complete institutional transformation. Like every rotten system and institution in Nigeria, what should be done to SARS is a reformative overhaul of the Unit that will purge it of all its iniquities.

    In the reform process, those among them whose records of performance are scandalous, disgraceful, damaging and below par should be dismissed summarily. Those with manageable records of several warnings and reprimands can be given orderly room trials to determine their post-reprimand behaviour. Those with excellent professional records and no misdemeanours should be retained and motivated with career palliatives and commendation letters.

    6. Lekan, mid 50s

    I recently read somewhere that anyone who isn’t joining people to condemn SARS right now has never experienced them, and does not have family meembers who have experienced them. It’s true. These SARS people have made themselves gods. They are a huge problem, and I love the fact that young people are going out to protest. I have heard so, so many true stories about innocent victims of these people, so I know they’re a problem.

    During service today, there were peaceful protesters moving around the church, and suddenly SARS operatives came with tear gas and started smoking the entire place up. We had to end service because church was filled with tear gas. And these protesters were peaceful o. The police needs to be more mature. They have a job to protect us, and if they can’t they need to be ended.

    7. Mr. T, 51

    The concept of SARS is not terrible. Nigeria made it terrible. I have done a lot of interstate road travelling and I have seen seen a lot of SARS harassments. Nigerians have the right to protest peacefully, and I’m proud they’re doing just that.

    Find more information on the EndSARS Movement here

    David Odunlami

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  • #EndSars: Stories On Sars Brutality

    Sars brutality stats:

    sars brutality

    We are populating an unending list of people who’ve been victims of Sars brutality.

    Here are a few:

    1)

    2)

    3)

    https://twitter.com/Brighttez1/status/1314854157279518722?s=20

    4) Trigger warning:

    5)

    6)

    7)

    https://twitter.com/bulamabukarti/status/1314657361437622273?s=20

    8)

    9)

    10)

    If you want to help out with this list, here’s a good place to start. To read more on #Endsars protest, start here.

    Pls, tag us on social media for credible stories you find.

    Hassan Yahaya

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  • Everything You Need To Know About The #EndSars Protest

    The EndSars protest has been going on around the country throughout this week. While the protests have been largely peaceful, law enforcement agencies seem not to be on the same page with Nigerian citizens. From allegation of intimidation to even tear-gassing protesters, it’s been a weird week.

    To better understand the why of the protest, let’s start with the history of Sars. The special antirobbery squad (sars) was created to protect Nigerian citizens after a wake of unprecedented armed robberies in the country. To prevent armed robbers from recognizing them, they wore plain clothes, carried guns, drove unmarked vehicles and put the fear of God in armed bandits. Their success made them the heroes of the people.

    What changed?

    However, as the autonomy of sars increased, things got out of control:

    I mean way out of control:

    In the past, Nigerians banded together to protest against this brutality and this prompted the Nigerian Government’s promise to either reform or scrap Sars, yet, nothing was done.

    Nothing at all:

    For the longest time, their activities largely went unchecked. However, constant stories of citizen harassment kept springing up in the news. This then led to a wave of agitation by Nigerians that enough is enough. And thus, started a wave of calls for a fresh peaceful protest.

    Protesters gathered across the country to re-ask the government to uphold their promise to reform Sars.

    Here’s what they met:

    After a lot of social media outcry, their safety was finally guaranteed. And they were met by politicians.

    https://twitter.com/NotJustSalmanPR/status/1314332912880357376?s=20

    Here’s what we know so far:

    1. Protesters slept in the cold without any protection.

    2. Nigerians have made donations to feed protesters.

    3. There was an emergency session today at the Lagos state house to discuss the way forward.

    For now, as we wait for things to unfold. You can help by either joining a protest or talking about it. To find out how to help, this article here and here are good places to start from.

    Hassan Yahaya

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  • SARS Was Created When The Police Ran Away

    Citizen is a column that explains how the government’s policies fucks citizens and how we can unfuck ourselves.

    Nothing symbolises how dysfunctional Nigeria has become like the terrorism that is carried out daily by faceless officers of the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS). See, I know we still don’t have 24-hour electricity 60 years after Independence. I know our roads are shite and our hospitals are crappy. But how can some criminals keep terrorising Nigerians because they’re an “Anti-Robbery Squad”? Worse, the government just keeps dancing around the issue without doing something symbolic to solve the problem.

    In this article, I will write about the history of SARS itself, and why it was nothing more than a makeshift squad to solve robbery crimes when the police ran away from the streets of Lagos because soldiers were chasing them.

    (Wait, what?)

    The Killing of Colonel Rimdan

    On the night of September 6 September 1992, Ezra Rimdan, a colonel in the Nigerian Army Training and Doctrine Command (TRADOC), Minna, was returning from a visit to an army general in Ikoyi, Lagos. On getting to Herbert Macaulay Road, Yaba, he met a police checkpoint and his driver was ordered to halt, after which he was ordered out of the car.

    Soon, in another notorious case of extra-judicial killings by members of the Nigerian Police Force, he was shot dead by the officers on duty. However, unknown to the police, they had just killed an army officer, and they took to their heels when they realised this.

    Of course, soldiers were furious, and a full-blown war began between Nigerian soldiers and the Nigerian police. Police officers all across Lagos withdrew from checkpoints and literally hid in their barracks, for fear of being killed by soldiers in reprisal attacks.

    It took two weeks of talks led by Brigadier Fred Chijuka, the Director of Defence Information at that time, and other influential soldiers to settle the discord. The three policemen involved in that killing were also sentenced for murder.

    The Invention of SARS

    You must be wondering, “So how does this killing have anything to do with SARS?”. Just hold on (we’re going home).

    Remember that the police were inactive for two weeks because they were afraid? Well, robbers exploited this opportunity to do what they do best. Notorious armed robbers like “Shina Rambo” took control of the streets of Lagos, looting and maiming with reckless abandon.

    It was in a bid to solve this crisis that SARS came into the picture. Simeon Danladi Midenda, who was in charge of the Anti-Robbery Unit at the State Criminal Investigation Department in Benin was drafted in by the then Inspector-General of Police, Alhaji Aliyu Attah, to combat the spate of robbery in Lagos that had quadrupled after the Lagos police fled their job.

    Because Assistant Commissioner of Police Simeon Midenda had done a great job at bringing robbers to their knees in Benin, there was confidence that he could handle the robbers in Lagos.

    When ACP Midenda got to Lagos, he met three senior police officers: the Commissioner of Police in Lagos, James Danbaba. Mike Okiro, Deputy Commissioner of Police (Lagos) Operations, and Abdulyekini Adeoye, Deputy Commissioner of Police (Lagos) Administration. All three told him to set up an anti-robbery team capable of chasing out armed robbers from Lagos. According to Midenda: “To start with, fifteen fully armed men and two plain coloured Peugeot station wagons were given to me.”

    Read: Is the DSS Abusing It’s Powers?

    Note that there were already anti-robbery squads at the time. In Lagos alone, there were three. One at the Criminal Investigation Department (CID) Alagbon, one attached to the Zone two command, and a third one at the Panti Criminal Investigation Department (CID). So, to differentiate his own anti-robbery squad, Mindenda added “Special” to the squad and called his new team “Special Anti-Robbery Squad” (SARS). They wore plain clothes, drove plain vehicles and could not be identified as government officers.

    And that was how SARS was born.

    SARS On The Beat (And On The Kill)

    To be honest, SARS was very effective in its earliest days. Because they wore plain clothes and carried themselves like “ordinary Nigerians”, it was hard for armed robbers to identify or escape them.

    What SARS would do was wait for traditional policemen to chase robbers, after which they would spring up on the robbers at designated points. The robbers would feed them with information about other robberies, and they would use this intelligence to solve other previous and forthcoming robberies.

    But this bread and butter situation changed when ACP Midenda was moved from Lagos to the Criminal Investigation Department, Umuahia, in 2002. Many state police commands started their own SARS department, oftentimes without giving them proper orientation, and the original SARS vision was lost.

    Today, SARS has become a menace to every Ikechukwu, Sleek and Kolade Johnson, stealing and looting from the same Nigerians they are supposed to protect.

    What Can We Learn From This Story?

    In December 2017, IGP Ibrahim Idris, concerned about the dastardly acts being perpetrated by SARS, directed that the outfit be re-organised under the office of a Commissioner of Police, who would be the overall head of the Federal Anti-Robbery Squad nationwide under the Department of Operations, Force Headquarters, Abuja. This was after a call to action by then Acting President, Professor Yemi Osinbajo.

    Remember that states police commands started having their own SARS commands after the success of Midenda’s SARS squad in Lagos. This decision, made by IGP Idris in 2017, was to put an end to the rot that happened in the system after SARS got decentralised in states. He hoped that the ungodly activities of SARS could be reduced if they were all brought under one command, thus the reason for the F-SARS (Federal Special Anti-Robbery Squad).

    In recent years, it is clear that this move has not worked. It is clear that reorganisation is not the solution to the SARS menace and SARS will do bad things under whatever command.

    The way I see it, a state of emergency needs to be declared on the Nigerian Police. All of them, including SARS. Our police are not well paid, are poorly trained and are easily the worst people in the Nigerian society. The World Internal Security and Police Index International even rated our police the worst in the world. The worst in the actual world!

    So, you can see that we are in a crisis. It’s not just SARS, it’s the entire police. It stinks and needs reforms. Serious ones. Until then, nobody is safe.

    Check back every weekday for more Zikoko Citizen stories.

    Doyin Olagunju

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  • #StopRobbingUs.

    It takes a lot to surprise the average Nigerian.

    Honourable senators breaking into fights on TV? Routine.

    The president announcing that he’s journeying abroad for healthcare inaccessible to the regular guy on the street? Irritated, but not surprised.

    But every time word gets out, of a policeman assaulting a citizen for using an iPhone, or sporting dreadlocks or moving about with a laptop, there is no amount of victims, no amount of tweet threads and no amount of repetition that would ever make it seem normal place.

    Recently, a software developer and twitter user – @toniastro_ narrated his ordeal at the hands of alleged SARS operatives around Ketu in Lagos State.

    In the thread that has been shared over 11,000 times, Toni narrated how members of Nigeria’s Police Force demanded he alight from a bike transporting him to get a BRT home, before demanding he pay the ridiculous sum of one million naira to members of the force.

    His pleas that he be released, as he was only a software developer working for a company fell on ears made deaf with guilt. To the policemen, “everything na yahoo-yahoo’, just going to show how detached Nigerian policemen are from the realities of changing vocational systems.

    He was taken to the Area H Police Command in Ogudu where he was subjected to all manner of physical abuse for hours before being made to part with an undisclosed amount of money that could have been at least half the amount in his account.

    This story is not unlike the hundreds or even thousands of others that have no doubt happened in the course of this year alone, but nothing can take away from the horror each new event brings.

    Perhaps what’s most frightening about these occurrences isn’t simply the fact that your mere existence, whether or not you’re sporting dreads, or tattoos or an iPhone could make you a potential target, but the fact that the one body of people, the same ones reports of assaults should ideally be tabled, are the sole harbringers of harm.

    In the aftermath of Toni’s attack, the #StopRobbing Us movement has been borne, an offshoot of the #EndSars movement which Nigerian youth have been campaigning for, for at least two years.

    This movement is largely supported by members of Nigeria’s tech scene, with big players like IrokoTV CEO – Jason Njoku, pledging ₦10 million to the cause. Whether or not the renewed vim will finally bring an end to this Nigerian scourge remains to be seen, we can only hope that until then, these uniformed marauders #StopRobbingUs until then.

    Boyin Plumptre

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  • Fifteen Things You Must Budget For If You Live In Nigeria
    If you are a part of the very small percentage of Nigerian adults who have their lives put together enough to make budgets, we have a thing or two to tell you. While you might think that you’ve covered all your bases. You’ve made a budget for food, transport even Friday night faji, there are a couple of key things you are leaving out of your budget that could ruin your finances.

    The second cloth you have to buy after your tailor takes the aso-ebi you bought for a wedding and travelled with it.

    Please, when are we going to come together as a people and boycott Nigerian tailors?

    The extra tyre you need to buy after that deep pothole on your street finally tears your tyre.

    And the second one you’ll buy after the same pothole tears the new one.

    If you thought you’ll need only 10k fuel for the month double it, because the transformer on your street will blow and you won’t have light for three months.

    And you’ll still contribute for NEPA people to come and fix the transformer.

    Drugs for malaria you only got because your street has been flooded for the past two weeks.

    By the time you get your hospital bill, you’ll wish you just stayed home and prayed the malaria away.

    The third and fourth internet subscriptions you have to pay for because the first two start moving mad.

    Then you go back to the first two when the third and fourth one starts misbehaving too.

    The funny sound your generator starts making even though you only serviced it last week.

    You’ll think it just needs to be serviced again until your gen guy tells you, you need to replace the carburetor.

    When someone steals wires from the NEPA pole on your street and you have to contribute to pay for it.

    You also have to settle the NEPA guys who will come and fix it.

    The new phone you have to buy because they obtained your old one in traffic.

    Shebi if the traffic was moving the thief won’t have seen road to collect your phone.

    When your rent is due on January 1st and your landlord tells you on the 31st that he’s increasing the rent.

    After you’ve used all your extra money for December rocks.

    Getting that message from your younger brother, sister asking for money.

    Me sef I need epp.

    The borehole in your compound just suddenly stops working because the last plumber to fix it used fake parts.

    And you just fixed it last month,

    All the people you have to settle just so you don’t die on the line collecting things like your driver’s license or passport.

    And they’ll still ask anything for the boys after you’ve settled them.

    Settling police so they can release your friend they carried for no reason.

    They said because he was using an iPhone he must be a yahoo boy.

    The side mirror of your car you have to replace because one danfo guy trying to overtake you hit it.

    After hitting it he started rolling on the floor using God to beg you.

    Having to replace the compressor of your freezer because NEPA blew it.

    And the surge protector you bought was fake.

    NEPA bringing a 90k bill for you even though they only gave you light twice that month.

    If you don’t have a prepaid meter go and get one now.

    Did we leave anyone out?

    Toketemu Ohwovoriole

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  • Uncle Yemi Osinbajo has done it again. This time, he has shown out for guys about the dreadful SARS situation.

    Why does it seem like whenever Baba Bubs goes on one of his frequent medical trips, things just seem to work a little better? Somebody help me say political gimmicks good governance.

    On Tuesday August 14, the Acting President aka Uncle Yemi gave directives to the Inspector General of Police, Ibrahim Idris to overhaul the Special Anti-Robbery Squad (SARS).

    We were shook!

    Especially because all our complaints had always been brushed off as false or exaggerated.

    Just a few weeks ago, Assistant Commissioner of Police, Yomi Shogunle still trolled Nigerians with this irresponsible tweet. He should better switch careers if he wants to be making silly jokes online.

    Oh, you remember SARS, the police unit that was so infamous for their abuse of power and Nigerian citizens, we had to write you a survival guide?

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BcUyVmPn2NS/?taken-by=endsarsmovement_now_

    This is just one of the many, many videos people have used to back their complaints. Let’s not even go into pictures and narratives. But we’re all lying, hey. The #EndSARS movement has been going for at least two years! Nonstop police brutality for two years.

    While we’re overjoyed that our pleas and relentless #EndSARS campaign finally made some headway, we still have some doubts.

    Way too many people have been unlawfully killed, jailed and extorted for us to just accept it, and things are often not what they seem in Nigeria. Gotta stay woke.

    First of all, it is important to note that this overhaul doesn’t mean the police department is going to be scrapped.

    This overhaul is more like a reform. In summary, the state SARS will be broken down and the officers reassigned to the already existing Federal SARS (there will only be FSARS). I know what you’re thinking, but chill. We are told that this is only going to be after investigations into the existing abuse allegations have been done, as well as mental evaluations and retraining.

    Again, I know what you’re thinking, because even the Federal SARS people abuse the citizens.

    The new FSARS is to be strictly intelligence-driven and their duties are to be restricted to the prevention and detection of armed robbery, kidnapping, and apprehension of offenders related to the stated offences. Nothing else.

    At least that’s what they’re telling us. Me I’m only a reporter.

    How are the illegal arrests going to stop, you ask?

    Well, the new FSARS officers are now mandated to go about bearing proper identities. They will have a ‘new’ uniform so there will be no more random black-polo-clad-hoodlum-looking-ass-niggas jumping out of unmarked space buses. At least this will curb the possibility of the officers being impersonated by armed robbers and such. Also, THEY ARE NO LONGER AUTHORISED TO STOP AND SEARCH! Let’s forget the fact that I still saw the same SARS doing that just yesterday.

    What can we do if we still get harassed?

    Call the police lol. Honestly, I don’t have an answer for this. This is a commendable move on Uncle Yemi’s part, but we worry about the enforcement and implementation. Hopefully, this is not just another one of those reforms that don’t change anything at the end of the day.

    And if you’re like me that is happy about this development but still believes this is just pre-election gra-gra and doesn’t trust anything this government does, I hope you’ve gotten your PVC o!

    If you haven’t, there are two more weeks for you to register. Hurry! If you need any help, we gatchu!

    Sade

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  • You know SARS right? These guys?

    The Special Anti Robbery Squad.

    Their job is to protect Nigerians, you know, keep us safe. But it turns out we have to protect ourselves from them these days.

    This is a step by step guide on how you can stay out of their trouble and  keep yourself safe .

    Step 1: If you aren’t bald yet, go and cut your hair.

    I repeat go to the nearest barber and chop it off!

    Step 2: Pick up your phone, Grab a hammer, now smash it! Don’t stop, keep smashing it.

    So when SARS says “Come on bring your phone” you can confidently say “sorry oga I don’t have”

    Step 3: This might be the hardest thing to do, but you should take my advice and destroy your car as well. Or at least give it to someone you don’t care about.

    If you don’t have a car and you take the bus, your chances of getting stopped are lower.

    Step 4: If you wear shirts, ripped jeans, sunglasses or even skirts, please do not wear it out.

    You see, they can’t say search you or say you’re dressed like a ‘yahoo boy or girl’ if you aren’t dressed at all.

    Step 5: If you carry bags, please leave them at home. Do I still have to explain why?

    When SARS asks you to bring your bag you can easily say “Sir I have nothing, I don’t even have a bag sir please sir.”

    Step 6: Just pray to God they don’t ask for your ID card.

    Because if your hair is mistakenly a bit full in that picture, well, God help you.

    Step 7: You need to develop a love for staying at home. Sit down in your house.

    Oya SARS come and meet me in my house.

    Step 8: If you have to go out, do what you have to do and leave. Just say your hello and go.

    Please do not be out for more than 30 mins before you go back into hiding.

    Finally, if you happen to follow all these precautions and they still stop you

    Just be saying “thank you for stopping me sir, I appreciate” but don’t forget to keep praying to God in your heart while you’re at it.

    Eniola

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