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After the semi-finals yesterday, nobody’s angrier than die-hard Ronaldo fans right now. If you want to make their day even worse, just do one of these things.
Wear an Argentina jersey, and shout “siuuu!”
Just walk in front of them in an Argentina jersey, and do Ronaldo’s signature celebration. You need to rub in the pain.
Show them this picture of Messi
It scattered football twitter a month ago because it’s basically two GOATs in one shot. But now, the story has changed.
Remind them that Messi has seven Balon d’Ors
If you’re in a GOAT debate with any Ronaldo fan, just know they’d ask you to bring facts. When they do, show them this picture.
Say the words “World Cup final”
Nothing can trigger them more than the fact that their fave will never lift that trophy.
Tell them you agree he’s second best
Ronaldo fans live for the GOAT debate. So throw them off by being reasonable and agreeing he’s second best. They won’t be able to contain their anger.
Tell them he’s your GOAT
They know you’re an opp, and you’re being sarcastic, and that’ll annoy them so much.
Become a Barça fan
The minute you announce you’re a Barca fan, Ronaldo fans will see you as an opp, and everything you do will irritate them.
If you want to start a war, ask football fans to choose between Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo. Over here, we do usually like violence, so we decided to ask these Nigerian men to pick their football faves and tell us why. The shade was plenty, but these are some of the answers they gave us.
Ryan, 33
I hate both of them, but let me start with all the reasons I can’t stand that short man devil, Messi. First off, he has scored countless goals against my team, Arsenal, including a hattrick. I also hate the fact that his stans continue to suck him off even though he hasn’t won a Champions League without Xavi and Iniesta. He is currently fighting for his life in a farmers’ league right now, but FIFA and the media keep giving him awards to support their propaganda that he is the greatest footballer.
I admire Ronaldo, but I’m not a fan. I only support him because doing so makes Messi stans angry.
Bolu, 20
Ronaldo is a finished player abeg. Can’t you see what he’s playing for Manchester United? It’s rubbish. He’s just staying there for no reason and you can tell he’s the type of player that wants everything to rotate around him. I prefer Messi because he’s a more technical player. When you see Messi playing, you can tell that he knows what he’s doing. He knows how to dribble better, pass better and finish better. As a whole, Messi’s a better team player, but Ronaldo is very lazy — he only knows how to score. Even if Messi has not been scoring goals this season, he impacts and assists his other teammates.
Mikey, 28
Ronaldo all the way Most people underrate the guy because what he does looks easy, but he’s killing it day in, day out. A lot of players have tried hard to keep up with Ronaldo when it comes to goals and finesse, and they’ve all failed. People say Messi is effortless and it’s “God-given talent”, but what is talent without hard work? So far, Ronaldo has conquered Spain, Italy, England and Portugal. Has Messi achieved something like that? No, he was too comfortable in Spain and even the PSG he plays for now, he has been terrible with like one goal in about 20 games. That’s very poor.
Tochukwu, 30
Messi is clearly the best footballer ever! Ronaldo does a lot of work before he gets results, but Messi is pure, God-given talent. Nobody has ever been or will ever be like Messi. The guy scores goals, makes goals and dribbles — he makes football a beautiful sport to watch. Ronaldo is good, but Messi is a notch higher and the greatest footballer the world has ever seen. I dare say he’s greater than Maradona, Pele and Zidane..
Danjuma, 23
Ronaldo is better on and off the pitch. Yes, Ronaldo is a good player, but even outside football, he has a personality that’s just lit AF. Outside football, Messi is a dead guy. We all know Messi can play well, but I also think he’s overrated because he has fans that see whatever he does as something spectacular. Messi is nothing without his fanbase. For Ronaldo, I can justify why I think he’s great. Numbers don’t lie and he’s proven it. But like I said, outside the pitch, he’s also scoring because he’s a bigger public figure, and he has hacked how to interact with his fans.
Oche, 26
Messi over Ronaldo every day. Messi has more goals and assists than Ronaldo when we look at their goals-to-game ratio. In 2012 alone, Messi scored over 90 goals, a feat neither Ronaldo or any other player has been able to achieve. For anyone getting into football for the first time, Messi is more entertaining to watch, and finally, he doesn’t have rape allegations hovering over him.
Chuma, 28
Ronaldo for sure because that guy is the GOAT among the two of them. Don’t get me wrong, Messi is brilliant, but what Ronaldo does is amazing. Ronaldo has that edge because he can walk into any league, any team and still kill it. Messi on the other hand has fewer goals than Werner this season. Plus, I don’t know how you can call the guy with the most goals in the world “overrated”.
Champions League round of 16 games continue tonight, and after Ronaldo and Juventus got eliminated by Pepe and Porto, everyone is looking forward to the game in Paris tonight to see if Messi and Barcelona can defeat PSG in a second leg tie again.
If somehow, that happens, and you’re a Ronaldo fan, we have some tips for you.
1. Get off social media
If you’re a Ronaldo fan, you don’t need to be on Twitter if somehow Barcelona qualifies into the quarter finals of the Champions League tonight. Just delete every social media app on your phone. You’ll see all sorts of tweets ranging from “Ronaldo woke up feeling dangerous today”, to “Penaldo only scores from penalties”. You don’t want that for your mental health.
2. Switch off your phone
When people realise you’re not on social media, they will start calling you. The best thing to do is to just switch off your phone. If they can’t reach you, they can’t laugh at you and shout “Messi is my GOAT!” endlessly.
3. Don’t go to work tomorrow
The people that want to mock you for your GOAT falling out of the Champions League before theirs are at your workplace. They’re waiting for you. Call HR and say you fell sick and you can’t make it to work. Save yourself from having a bad day.
4. Stop watching football
This one might be a bit extreme, but you should definitely consider it if Barcelona goes on to win the Champions League.