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professional | Zikoko!
  • “You Have to Maintain a Low Online Profile”— Nigerians Share Unspoken Rules About Their Jobs

    The saying “Different strokes for different folks” also applies to the jobs we do. Because different professions have different unwritten and unspoken rules that guide them, we decided to find out what they were. So, before you think of venturing into any of these career paths, here are some of the unofficial rules you should know.

    Graphic designer

    A very important rule for up-and-coming designers is to ensure you add an extra day for sleep and rest when giving a timeline for your work.  It’s also normal to assume a person is judging your design process simply because they’re watching you work.

    Writer 

    Always have your notes close. Whether it’s on your phone or an actual notepad, make sure you have something to jot things down. Ideas come at weird times, and if you don’t write them down, you’ll forget. Or worse, you’ll end up with a topic later on, but no idea how you got there.

    Customer service officer

    We say we’re happy to get back to you just so we can get off the call. Scam. We actually aren’t looking forward to calling you back.

    Project manager

    Even if the job says 9-5, you’ll be stuck talking to developers at night.

    Photographer 

    There’s only so much Photoshop can do to help with bad make-up. But don’t tell your client their makeup is ugly sha, especially if it’s a wedding. Just run it like that and do the best you can.

    Make-up artist

    Be ready to be their assistant because even though your job is about the face, you‘ll also have to look after their whole fit. So you’ll help with zipping dresses, adjusting jewellery, fixing weaves, etc. — things they didn’t pay you for.

    .

    Software developer

    You can’t tell a client that wants to build an app that his idea is not very smart.

    Teacher 

    You have to keep a low online profile. Kids will always be snooping around the internet to see what you’re up to outside of school. So if you must be online, make sure your accounts are private or at least PG-approved. And don’t use a particular phrase too much because your students will turn it into your nickname.

    Hairstylist

    Always be observant of your client’s mood. Do they want silence or do they want to gist? This will influence how you interact with them. Although most times, they may want to rant, so your job is to listen.

    Artist

    Always use references, as you need to have others to copy from. Also, keep in mind that clients will always promise future jobs when asking for discounts. Don’t fall for it, because if they eventually refer you to others, it’ll be other clients begging for discounts too. 

    Before you leave, here are 8 Sure-Fire Ways to Land Your Dream Job

  • A Week In The Life: The Eye Doctor Who Doesn’t See Herself Practising For Long

    “A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.


    The subject of today’s “A Week In The Life” is an optometrist. She debunks the myth that glasses correct eyesight, she gives us tips for healthy eyesight and tells us why she doesn’t see a future for herself in her profession.

    MONDAY:

    These days, I don’t have a fixed time to wake up because it depends on when I sleep. And I sleep at any time because I’m presently in-between jobs. However, on most days, when I sleep at midnight, I wake up by 7 am. 

    Today, when I wake up at 7, the first thing I do is try to plan my day. If I was working, I’d have woken up by 5:30 am 0r 6:00 am so as to beat Lagos traffic. Thankfully, those days are behind me. 

    As an optometrist, a typical clinic day involves assessing patients. A patient comes in and you do a comprehensive eye test. You take patient history, examine the patient’s eyes with a pen torch or an ophthalmoscope (this helps to check the back of the eyes). Then, depending on the patient’s complaints, signs and symptoms (redness of eyes or an injury, or disease), you’d either first treat those symptoms or refract the patient.  

    Refracting the patient means checking the lens power that’s suitable for the patient to see well. And to find out what the patient can also tolerate because you can give a powerful lens that makes the patient see really well but they aren’t comfortable with it. They can’t walk because the ground either appears too high or low. Or the lens gives them a headache. Many times, we have to reduce the clarity to make the patients feel comfortable. For example, for patients who don’t read, there’s no point refracting them to the highest clarity especially if it makes them uncomfortable with their environment. So, I ask patients their occupation to determine what kind of lens to give them. 

    All these things don’t matter for now. My major goal for today is to structure my day in a way that’s productive. But before I continue thinking, I need to eat. I don’t want to faint over anything. 

    TUESDAY:

    Yesterday was productive, but today, not so much. I’ve spent a large part of today daydreaming. Like now, I’m remembering one patient that was brought to the clinic by his parents. An 8-year-old boy who, according to his father, was very stubborn. One day, while the dad was flogging the boy, the cane mistakenly touched the child’s eye. On examination of the eye, we realised that the lens had changed position. That is, the lens was no longer in its normal place. 

    When we checked the eye pressure, it was 50 something and normal eye pressure is between 10-21 mmHg. The boy had already lost his vision. To preserve what was left of the eye, we referred the boy for emergency surgery. Even after the surgery, his sight never returned.

    On days like this, I can’t help but imagine how the father feels. I don’t know if he’ll ever forgive himself. Does he wonder that perhaps if he had controlled his anger, his son would still have two functional eyes? 

    I’m starting to think myself into sadness again. I’m going to sleep and try to restart my day after I wake up.

    WEDNESDAY:

    People are funny sha. Today, a friend texted me asking for “free” tips to take care of his eyes. The person didn’t even offer money for consultation but because I’m nice, I told him some things. 

    The fundamental rule is that you shouldn’t put just anything in your eye. Also, if you use makeup regularly and realise that you are allergic to a particular product, it’s advisable to discontinue it. For people with a family history of glaucoma (not everyone might know), it’s advisable to go to an eye clinic once every year. This is to help in early detection and control of the disease because it has no cure. Glaucoma causes nerve damage in the eyes, which can’t be restored when lost, so early detection is the best bet to slowing its progression. 

    People who stare at computers all day are advised to practise the 20-20-20 rule. That is, for every 20 minutes, you should look at something 20 feet (Editor’s note: 20 feet is as tall as a giraffe or about two and a half times as tall as an artificial Christmas tree) away for 20 seconds. The computer is always in your face, therefore you should look away at intervals. 

     If that isn’t possible, then the next step should be anti-reflective lenses. These help to reduce the strain on the eye because of the light from the screens of computers. Additionally, for UV light, sunglasses are recommended for everyone because UV light can cause a lot of damage to the eye. A lot of people think that sunglasses are for fashion but you’re actually protecting your eyes by wearing them. 

    The most important tip I gave him was that people shouldn’t wait until there’s a problem before visiting the clinic. People should try to check their eyes regularly once a year and shouldn’t see it as a waste of money. Especially in cases like glaucoma (also known as the silent thief of sight), where you wouldn’t detect it until it’s too late.

    I should have charged him for the consultation. Another time will come. 

    THURSDAY:

    One of the biggest misconceptions people have is that glasses are meant to fix your eyesight. They are not. 

    For issues like myopia/short-sightedness (where you can’t see things that are far away) what happens is that images meant to be formed on the retina are formed in front of it. In hyperopia/farsightedness (where you can’t see close images), the image is formed at the back of the retina. While there are many reasons why this happens, the common symptom is that vision at this point is blurry.

    So, how will a piece of glass change how your eyes are? What glasses do is that they manipulate the light coming into your eyes to fall on the retina so that you can see clearly. A child’s prescription changes because their eyes are developing. Even for adults, their eyes sometimes change. It doesn’t mean that glasses cure you; they just help. It’s like saying wheelchair cures paralysis, it doesn’t. It’s only an aid. Some of these conditions are progressive so most people have to change their glasses every two years. Other times, it’s regressive so you also need to adjust your lens accordingly. 

    Factors like diabetes and hypertension also affect vision. If your blood sugar shoots up, there can be sudden blurred vision. There are times patients complain about blurry vision, and I ask them to check their blood sugar. Some say the range is high, so I don’t give them anything because once the blood sugar level comes down, the refractive index (how fast light enters the eye) changes and the lens is wasted. In cases like that, the solution is usually to get their blood sugar under control. 

    The issue of glasses needing a change every time is not our fault. The refractive state of your eyes can change at any time. And because the glasses are for only one state, the glasses will have to be changed when the refractive state changes.

    This is what I spent my whole day doing: convincing someone that optometrists aren’t out to cheat them. 

    FRIDAY:

    Optometry struggles as a profession in Nigeria because it’s not well known and the pay is low. A lot of people come to the eye clinic and don’t even know what optometry is. They just refer to me as an eye doctor. For people that even know, they don’t really understand the scope of what the job entails. Every time I tell someone I’m an optometrist, I have to explain what I do.

    Having to explain all the time can be tiring. I think one of the reasons optometry is not really known is because, in Nigeria, we have over 170 universities and only about seven offer optometry. Even people who attended schools offering the course with me still don’t know what we are doing. 

    One time, a patient asked if I was an optometrist or an ophthalmologist, and I had to explain the difference. Then the person was like: “Why would you spend 6 years on that? Why didn’t you just go for ophthalmology instead?” For people like me who didn’t choose it as a first choice, it’s always very hurtful. It’s like a reminder that I made a mistake when it’s not the reality.

    Another thing is that in clinical practice, there is no clear hierarchy like in medicine where you can become a consultant and charge some kind of money. We don’t have that option. There’s not a lot of difference between someone who has been working for the past 20 years and someone who has been working for 5. You don’t have much to make you invaluable. You can’t even threaten to leave because there’s a newer, younger replacement for you. 

    Today, I can’t help but imagine my ideal future — a satisfying job where I feel like I’m making a difference in the world. It also involves having my own family and living a quiet life.


    Editor’s note: The images used were taken randomly from the internet as the subject wanted anonymity.

    Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

  • Are You A Professional Short Cut Finder? This Is For You!

    1. When google maps says it will take you 3 hours to get somewhere.

    Am I travelling to heaven?

    2. When your mum tells you to cook food that is meant to take 3 hours to prepare.

    Sorry ma , you and who?

    3. When people say there is no easy way out.

    I laugh in “let’s bet”.

    4. When someone expects you to use a broom when there is a vacuum cleaner.

    Are you not insane like this?

    5. When you see “just add water” cake mix and pancake mix.

    Look at God!

    6. When you have an assignment that your professor says will require at least 12 hours of research.

    On your own sir!

    7. When you have 12 errands to do and you are trying to see how you can do 4 at a time.

    How shall I conquer?

    8. When your short cut does not work and now it will take you twice as long to sort everything out.

    Na wa oh!
  • 12 Pictures You’ll Understand If You’ve Ever Hired A Nigerian

    1. When you ask your Nigerian tailor if they can “sew the style.”

    2. When you tell a Nigerian photographer to make you look “natural”.

    That’s how you know they are serious.

    3. When your Nigerian hairdresser wants to kill you.

    https://twitter.com/Sawamss/status/603548710258225152

    4. When you give a Nigerian mechanic your car and it spends so long with him it turns to his own.

    Edakun, can I have my car back?

    5. When you go to a Nigerian doctor and the first diagnosis you get is:

    Is that all?

    6. When a Nigerian nurse wakes you up to give you a sleeping pill.

    Hian!

    7. When you finish paying your Nigerian caterer and they now tell you they don’t make small chops.

    Better go and find.

    8. When your Nigerian makeup artiste uses your picture to do ‘Before & After’ without asking.

    Somebody wants to die.

    9. When the generator repairer finishes work and now uses your fuel to wash his hands.

    Is this one mad?

    10. When your Nigerian cab driver swears he knows the way, then starts asking for directions when you enter.

    Don’t just vex me.

    11. When that thing your Nigerian electrician just ‘fixed’ shocks you.

    Hay God.

    12. When you go to any Nigerian barbing salon and this is the first picture you see:

    That’s how you know they are serious.