Pay | Zikoko!

There are just so many services out there now and quite a number of them are subscription-based. This means if you’re not ready to pay for them, you can’t have access. Fair enough, yeah?

But for the average young Nigerian adult, this also comes with a set of struggles.

1. You, looking at a new service you think you will enjoy

I have Netflix already, but Showmax and Disney Plus look interesting too.

2. You, when you realise you can afford it every month

Just ₦3k? Let’s do this.

3. Also you when a service requires you to pay for a full-year at once

You people should better take up arms.

3. When you eventually find out that you’re subscribed to more services than you actually need

Make it make sense why I’m giving all of these people my money.

4. When the people you share your accounts with for free use the service more than you do

And I’m the only one paying?

5. When it’s the end of the month and the debits start coming in

It’s the end of the world. No one can tell me anything.

6. When you share subscription costs with someone and they stop paying after the first month

You think you’re smart abi?

7. And the most painful part, when you forget to cancel a free trial before the next charge

Toheeb Lanlehin

October 21, 2021

Money

Debit Alert, netflix, Pay, Payments, service
Never lend a Nigerian an amount that would kill you to part with, because no one has ‘Onigbese’ written on their head. So, to help you move on, here are 15 signs that you are never seeing that money again.

1. When you call to ask for your money and they’re like:

Hay God! On top my own money?

2. When they completely stop updating on social media.

If you like delete all your accounts.

3. When they start using God to swear.

Don’t let God punish you.

4. Onigbeses and “I didn’t see your missed call”

Ode, how will you see?

5. When they start acting brand new.

You call them and they’ll be like, “Is there a problem?”

6. When they always find a way to imply that they’re broke when they see you.

Na so.

7. When they ask if they can pay you in installments.

5k now, 3k later, 2k on your death bed.

8. When you message them on WhatsApp and they leave you on:

See my life.

9. When you ask them if they saw your message.

Don’t let me swear for you.

10. When they start telling you about money that will soon enter their account.

I’ve heard you.

11. Whenever they see you in public.

See this one.

12. When they start telling you about their family problems.

Is that what I asked you?

13. When they text you an epistle everytime you remind them about the money.

Is this one mad?

14. When they start reminding you of all the things they’ve done for you in the past.

“Remember that time I bought you Tampico in JSS 2.”

15. When they finally block you everywhere.

Somebody wants to die.

NerdEfiko

June 23, 2020

Inside Life

Borrow, Debtor, Lend, money, Nigeria, Onigbese, Pay
1. When you get that first credit alert.

I’m now a bad guy!
2. When all the debit alerts enter and the money starts disappearing.

Na wa oh!
3. When your parents no longer dash you money anyhow.

But I am still in need now!
4. When your siblings start expecting you to buy them all sorts of things.

My friends you better get out!
5. When borrow-borrow family members think you are now an ATM.

You and who please? The Lord will provide for you.
6. When you start realising how valuable every single naira is.

Wow!
7. When your friends start bringing their aso ebi.

“It’s not in my culture to buy aso ebi and I don’t want to offend the gods.”
8. When you start seeing “bank maintenance charge”.

What does that one mean?
9. When unexpected expenses come out of nowhere and reduce your salary to chicken change.

Lord help me!
10. When you realise you still have to pay taxes, insurance and pension contribution.

AH!

Jola Ayeye

May 23, 2018

Oldies

Adult, Adulthood, adulting, finance, growng up, money, Pay, payday, salary
Today, Nigerian twitter is lit with this discussion. Again. Who should pay on a date? But we can all agree that circumstances can be different right? So we thought of 3 instances:

1. If you invite someone out on a date, who should pay?

I may be wrong, but if you set a date up with someone who would otherwise be undisturbed in their house – and not spending money – shouldn’t you pay for whatever activity you both indulge in? Isn’t that just common courtesy? Social etiquette dictates that the person extending the invitation should be the one who pays for the meal. I know some people disagree but come on!

Why will you tell someone to leave their house (where they weren't spending money) and go on a date with you, and tell them to split bill?

— Daniel Orubo (@NerdEfiko) October 12, 2015

2. When you invite someone out, and they bring their friends, should you pay for the friends too?

Again, I may be wrong, but if someone invites you out on a date, isn’t it just wrong to bring your friends? Asides from the financial implications, the person wanted to spend time with you and you brought a convoy. Then, the person should pay for them too? Really? Come on guys, these issues are not that hard if you just respect the other party. Seriously.

https://twitter.com/SabreNoir/status/653482183944970240

3. When someone organizes a birthday hangout, how should the bills be handled?

See, this is double edged. But let’s try. It’s your friends birthday, they’re inviting you to hangout. Wouldn’t you have thought of giving the person something for their birthday? As a friend, you shouldn’t go and rack up bills for another person that you don’t intend to pay a part of. I mean, who are you?

https://twitter.com/MakiSpoke/status/653316188236349444

I don’t disagree with this tweet. Contribute oh! And don’t show up to a party empty-handed. That’s just rude. Guys, it’s just decency and respect. That’s all. If you have those, then you would probably do the right things.

Now to the big question.

Odunayo

October 12, 2015

General, Gist

Bills, Date, Nigerian, Pay