nigerian relationship

Apparently there is a method to Nigerian relationships. We noticed it like we notice everything and we made a list to share this discovery with you.

Meet the 5 major stages of Nigerian relationships;

1. The honeymoon phase.

This is when you both just started dating and you still can’t get enough of each other. You talk all day and video call all night while still texting each other in between. You spend 2 hours apart and it’s all “I missed you” when you see again (*insert eye roll plix*). This is basically the time and part where you just annoy everybody.

2. The cute social media announcement.

Then comes the cute social media update. You finally found love and you must let your virtual friends and followers know because why? Because pepperdem! Plus in the guide to being a millennial a social media announcement is an important relationship level to unlock. Plus you also want to let your ex know you’ve moved on- pepperdem.

3. The first fight.

And then comes the first big fight. And sometimes an ex even makes a cameo appearance to make things more complicated. The opening statement is usually “Who is she?”. This is also usually when the first red flag comes up but the bliss of the honeymoon phase will not let you see road. If you look well enough (as you should be doing) you would see that this fight tells you a lot about your partner too. Like where are all these insults coming from? I thought you said I was perfect.

4. Then shit gets real.

At this point romance gives way to reality. Shit gets real and the reality of the heavy weight commitment that a relationship demands comes into play. For some people the weight becomes too much and they cave in to it. Thus bringing an abrupt end to the forever they promised each other.

5. The comes the Bloom.

This is when the relationship survives all the initial gragra and grows into something you are both now comfortable and happy with. When it becomes less about the sex and more about the time you spend with each other. And even more importantly- you both now know each other. This is where the real relationship starts.

Do you think we skipped a stage? Drop it in the comment section.

Meanwhile, if you want to know why you are still single this ingenious quiz will tell you why. You’re welcome.

Click here for happy thoughts.

Blessing Onyelobi

April 17, 2020

Inside Life

nigerian relationship, Nigerian relationships, Relationship, relationship goals, Relationship Status, relationships
Ending a relationship is one thing, but moving on from it is like on the next page. Sometimes you get so caught up in the hurt that moving on starts seeming impossible. We’re here to help you get past this tough phase. Here are 10 fun ways to get over your Nigerian ex boyfriend.

1. Kindly ask him to return your mumu button.

Chances are that he would not, maybe because he has misplaced it or he sold it to buy sharwama. In the event of that keep reading, we’ll get you through this one way or another.

2. Don’t ignore the hurt.

And don’t tell yourself you should not be feeling hurt. Your feelings are valid. Feel the pain, but don’t let it make you bitter.

3. Reach out to your girlfriends.

Now is the time to call in your girl squad and have some fun with them. You need your support system around you and chilling with your favorite girls will do the trick.

4. Keep your self busy.

Find something fun to keep yourself busy with. It could be a new hobby like going to the gym, learning a skill you have always been interested in or just pouring yourself into work.

5. Mute or Block him.

If you can’t handle seeing him all over your timeline then by all means mute or block him. This is not you being petty, this is you putting your mental health first and acting in your best interest.

6. Return his stuff.

Yes boo. You need to give back all the mushy sentimental things you are holding on to. They will only remind you of him and make it harder for you to move on.

7. Binge watch old Nollywood movies with their ridiculous plot lines.

If not for anything, at least to get a good laugh.

8. Write about your feelings.

Writing about your feelings can be very therapeutic. It’s like giving yourself an outlet to vent and rant about how you are feeling and possibly make sense of it. You can get a journal if you want it to be private.

9. Have some Me time.

Now is the time to date yourself/hang out with yourself. The beautiful thing about being alone is that you get to spend time with yourself. You get to reflect about your life and the choices you make.

10. Give yourself time to heal.

zikoko- getting over your nigerian ex

It may take a little longer than the books say, but you will heal eventually. And this will be a phase you will look back on and probably even make jokes about. But for now, don’t put yourself on any timer.

While you are here, we would love a review of our “What She Said” column. Be a darling and leave it HERE.

Blessing Onyelobi

April 6, 2020

Her

nigerian relationship, Nigerian relationships, relationships in nigeria
1. Yes, I slept with your friend. But now you know she can’t be trusted.

You’re welcome o.
2. Okay, so I ate another womans food. At least now I appreciate yours more

Nawa o, I was only trying to help.
3. Wow, you didn’t know that when I was calling another woman baby, I was only trying to teach you to share

You can’t even share. So selfish
4. So I didn’t pick up your calls. Don’t you know absence makes the heart grow fonder

Duh, I’m doing this for us.
5. Maybe I said football is more important than you. But only because I’m trying to teach you not to trust anyone

Obviously na, it’s common sense na.
6. Yes o, if you cheat, i’ll leave you. Because cheating is wrong

Because cheating is wrong.
7. If I break up with you, i’m only teaching you to have strength

That’s the whole point. Now you’re a stronger person.

Osaretin Tunde-Oni

March 27, 2017

Oldies

nigerian relationship, relationships

1. The honeymoon phase.

2. The cute social media announcement.

3. The first fight.

4. Then shit gets real.

5. The comes the Bloom.

1. Kindly ask him to return your mumu button.

2. Don’t ignore the hurt.

3. Reach out to your girlfriends.

4. Keep your self busy.

5. Mute or Block him.

6. Return his stuff.

7. Binge watch old Nollywood movies with their ridiculous plot lines.

8. Write about your feelings.

9. Have some Me time.

10. Give yourself time to heal.

1. Yes, I slept with your friend. But now you know she can’t be trusted.

2. Okay, so I ate another womans food. At least now I appreciate yours more

3. Wow, you didn’t know that when I was calling another woman baby, I was only trying to teach you to share

4. So I didn’t pick up your calls. Don’t you know absence makes the heart grow fonder

5. Maybe I said football is more important than you. But only because I’m trying to teach you not to trust anyone

6. Yes o, if you cheat, i’ll leave you. Because cheating is wrong

7. If I break up with you, i’m only teaching you to have strength