hustle | Page 15 of 18

A Week in the Life: The Agbero Trusting God for a Better Life

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject for today’s “A Week In The Life” is *Tola. He collects money at the bus park, and he’s what Nigerians refer to as Agbero. He talks about wanting to quit his job, his faith in God and why he shows up every day.

MONDAY:

I’m on the road as early as 5:30 or 6:00 a.m. on most days. I have to beat traffic and get to work early because the earlier I do, the faster I can begin to make money for the day. Most people don’t know that agbero work is just like being a marketer — we have daily deliverable targets per day. I don’t earn a salary, so I depend on whatever extra money I make per day. Depending on your location and performance, your daily target can be somewhere between ₦30,000 – ₦45,000, and a failure to meet this target means you pay out of pocket. On the bright side, if you surpass your target, you get to keep the extra amount. Therefore, every single minute counts in this job.

This pressure is why some people do anything to collect money from buses; they’ll threaten to break their windscreen, remove the fuel tank cover or wipers. The union [NURTW] believes that there’s no way you’ll go out and not meet your target, so they don’t listen to excuses. Everyone has a daily target, and that’s why you’ll see agberos collecting booking fee from one bus stop to the next. We give numbers and sell tickets to show who has paid and who hasn’t. The funniest part is that the tickets are provided and printed by the state government, so a portion of our daily target also goes to them. We hand over whatever money we make to the park chairman [each park has a chairman] who then hands it over to the union’s executives. At this point, the money is shared amongst them and the state government who provides the tickets.

It is what it is.

It rained today so there were not a lot of buses on the road. I made my daily target with barely enough money for food and transportation for tomorrow. I’m praying for God’s favour because I’m tired of this job.

TUESDAY:

Things weren’t always like this for me. I wasn’t always an agbero working for a union. I learnt printing press work, but there was no money to buy a machine neither was there anyone to help me. So I set up a baba Ijebu kiosk to raise money to buy machines. Things were going well until I fell in love with one lady like this. After we started dating, nothing was coming in again. Getting money to eat even became difficult for me.

Then she fell pregnant.

Things became three times more difficult for me after that. I kept on struggling until my son was born. One year plus after his birth, she left me. Her reason was that she re-assessed her fortunes and saw that there was no future with me. After all, when she met me, I had a lotto kiosk and I was making money. Now that things were no longer the same, she went to consult her stars and they told her to remarry.

Today, I’m thinking about the fact that it’s been almost six years now, and I still don’t have money. I left the printing press to Baba Ijebu to agbero work and still, nothing tangible till now. I’m still using agidi to get money to eat. If I get a better job today, I’m gone. It’s not like I signed a life contract with these people. Even if I did, this is not the kind of job that someone should do forever.

WEDNESDAY:

Under the sun and in the rain, we’re always hustling, we’re always collecting money. It’s only God that will pity us. There’s no protection, no place to rest, nothing. If you want to urinate, you’ll find somewhere by the side to do it. When you want to toilet, you’ll look for a public toilet and pay ₦50 to use it. If you’re sick, you’ll beg someone to stand in for you so you can make your deliverables and if you’re lucky, they will make some money to give you so you can hold body.

Coronavirus time was so bad because no movement meant no work. During that time, I’d just go and do twale on the street for someone that will dash me money. Other times, we’ll group ourselves like four or five and go to a construction site and do labour assistant. Sometimes, when we see people digging borehole, we go and meet them for at all at all money. I wasn’t happy doing that, but I had to eat. To worsen matters, people will just talk to you anyhow and you’ll be tired of life. You’ll be asking yourself: what kind of person is this? Why am I here? Why is this person talking to me like this?

I had an incident like that today. I was calling passengers for a bus driver and a passenger insulted me. After calling price for this woman, she refused to pay when I asked her for money. Instead, she started blasting and rubbishing me. I wanted to reply but people around said I shouldn’t talk. So I kept on looking.

It has been almost three hours since this happened but I can’t stop thinking about it. I’m looking forward to going home at 8 p.m. With the way my day is going, I’ll make enough money to meet my daily target and still have some change. My plan is to go home and drink a chilled bottle of malt because I can’t kill myself.

THURSDAY:

Today, I’m thinking about my son. He’s just six years old and unaware. He lives with grandma, but sometimes, he comes to stay with me. We’re doing one week on and off at work, so he comes during my week off. When he’s not around, I help someone manage their lotto kiosk, and they give me money to hold body.

My son doesn’t know what I do for now because union work is not something I’m proud of. I don’t even wear the uniform. I wear the cap once in a while. When he’s around, we watch cartoon and sports as father and son because these are the memories I want him to have of me. It’s tough raising a male child and being a good role model that the child can follow. It’s lonely because I have no woman and I’m not remarried — the only thing that gives me joy is my boy.

I’ve spoken to my friends that if they have a better job they should let me know. I have my SSCE degree, so I can do factory work or office assistant. Anything that will benefit me, I’ll do it. If God is kind to me, I know the type of education I want to give my son. Part of my prayer every night is that God should spare his life because I don’t know what I’ll do if I suddenly no longer can’t hear his infectious laughter. The one he makes especially when we’re watching sports and I’m gesticulating to him.

My prayer is simple: “God, another year is about to end and I’m getting older. When it’s my time, answer my prayers. It hasn’t been easy because I haven’t gotten a better job. I need something better because I just want to start living.”

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

[donation]

Hassan Yahaya

November 17, 2020

Hustle

agbero, buses, danfo, hustle, money, Nigeria, NURTW
“I Don’t Want People To Say I Eat Too Much”— A Week In The Life Of A House Help

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject of today’s “A Week In The Life” is Mercy. She’s a house help in her early twenties. She talks about leaving home to come to Lagos, the difficulties of her job and how bosses can be mean to house helps.

MONDAY:

Every day except Sunday, I wake up by 5 a.m. It takes me roughly one hour to have my bath, dress up and prepare to start my day. I live downstairs, and the family I’m working with stays upstairs. Before 6 a.m., I go upstairs, knock on their door, and they let me into their side of the house. And so my day begins.

The first thing I do is make breakfast. I have to ensure that before everyone wakes up, food is ready. Breakfast in this house is by 7:30 a.m. Sometimes, if I’m done making the food early, I’ll clean the house. Other times, I’ll do laundry. There’s a washing machine in the house, but there are some clothes [white shirts, nativewear] I prefer washing with my hand because the machine would spoil it.

Sometimes, if I’m hungry while preparing breakfast, I take out my own food and eat. Then I continue working. If I don’t feel like eating, I cover the food and continue with chores. Before 8 a.m., I’m usually done with anything chores and breakfast, so I go downstairs to rest.

Lunch is by 1:30 p.m, so I start preparing it by noon. We eat swallow for lunch because mummy says eating it at night won’t allow the food to digest. After lunch, if there’s no other work, I go back downstairs to rest.

By 4 p.m., I go upstairs to prepare supper, and I’m done under two hours. In the evening, we eat light food like beans or spag or potato. We also try to eat around 6 p.m. There’s nothing to do after I’m done cooking today, so I go downstairs for the last time. The next agenda is to have my bath and sleep.

TUESDAY:

I’m thinking about how staying alone downstairs is boring for me. I have nobody to talk to. I’m the only one downstairs, and nobody talks to me upstairs. It’s only when they want to send me on an errand that they talk to me.

I was using a phone that had Facebook. I used it to waste time whenever I was downstairs. But the other day, heavy rain came and I went upstairs to close their windows. By the time I got back to my room, rain had entered and soaked my bed, my phone, everything. That’s how the phone stopped working. I don’t think the phone can be able to on again. I just have one small phone I manage to make calls with.

Loneliness can make someone tired. There’s no one to talk to, no TV to distract you from your thoughts. There’s a TV in the house, but I don’t watch it because how can I say that I’m sitting in my oga’s parlour to watch TV? Even on Sunday, which is my day off, I still can’t do that.

I always remind myself to focus on the work that brought me to this house. I have to remember that I’m looking for something. If I work and exhaust myself, I won’t have time to be thinking too much. I’ll sleep immediately I land on my bed. It’s that afternoon boredom I need to work on because that’s when the thing bothers me the most. Though I don’t mind it much because I always remember to focus on my reason for being here.

WEDNESDAY:

I’m in Lagos because I have a plan for my life. I’m a hairdresser; I used to make hair very well. It’s just that I never had money to open my own shop, so I decided to drop out of secondary school and do any job to raise shop money. I was supporting myself through secondary school with the business, and it was barely enough. When I now enter university where it’s harder to combine work and school, how do I want to survive?

There’s no support from home like that. We are six in our family, so whose education will they pay for? That’s why I dropped out in SS 2 to look for money. Let me start my own business. Maybe it can help my future.

It’s not like I’m even perfect in housework. I just know that nothing is hard as long as you put your mind to it. So I spoke to an agent that I needed work. He asked me what kind? I said anyone that’s available. He gave me some options, and I chose housework.

House girl work favours me because I’m not a Lagos girl. I’m a Hausa girl who came to Lagos. If I’m doing work that requires me to enter buses, I can’t survive. Back home in Taraba state, I used to stay indoors. This Lagos that I came, I didn’t tell my parents until I landed.

I like Taraba state because everything is peaceful and the food is plenty. I miss eating fresh yam, fresh corn, groundnut stew. The only bad thing there is there’s no money. The jobs there don’t pay like in Lagos. If I was still in Taraba and someone told me to do house girl, I won’t lie to you, I won’t be able to do it. Me that I was living with my parents and they were feeding me. But since I’ve left home, nobody is feeding me or giving me money, so I have to do the work.

Every day my mum is always crying for me to come because Lagos life is different. She’s always saying that people from the north are dying in Lagos, and they don’t know why. She’s like if I don’t take care in Lagos, she’s not sure I’ll still be a human being.

I keep telling her that I can’t come back home without money. I don’t want to go back home and someone will insult me that I left home and didn’t make anything. I call her at least two times a week so she can be hearing my voice. Today, after work, I plan to call her. I just pray that I don’t sleep off because I’m feeling tired.

THURSDAY:

The hardest part of being a house girl is being patient. Every job requires some level of patience if you want to get something from it. Another thing is that you must accept that the work will be hard. If it’s not hard, why will my madam bring someone to help her?

You need to have the mind to do house girl work. The reason is that when you’re working for someone, even if something is right and they say it’s not, you have to accept. If the person gets you angry, you can’t show it. If they say you should do something you don’t agree with, you must do it.

I have come to realise that in Lagos, many people who are oga or madam treat house girls like slaves. They talk to you anyhow, and if you try to explain yourself, they’ll say you don’t have manners. Some ogas will call you and on your way to meet them they’ll shout: “I called you since; why didn’t you answer me on time?” When you’re doing a chore, they’ll complain you’re doing it slowly. They take you like you don’t know anything and control you.

You can’t get angry or take the shouts seriously because you can’t get money easily, and to make money you have to suffer. That one is a normal thing.

I like the current family I’m with. They’re nice to me — nobody shouts at me or makes me do stuff I don’t like. I’ve only been in their house for two months, so I’m praying that it remains sweet till whenever I leave. Some people will be nice when you’re new, and when you’ve been in the house for long, they’ll show you a different character.

These people take me like I’m their family member. Everything they eat, I must eat. The mum is so nice. When she buys fruit, she’ll be like, “Mercy, don’t think that the fruit is for only mummy and daddy oh, you can eat out of it.”

Me, I’m scared of eating oh. Especially when I’m new. I don’t want people to say I’m eating eating eating or I’m finishing their food.

These people don’t care if you eat, eat, eat. They’ll say take this if you want to eat. I thank God for blessing me with this very very nice family where no one is shouting at me.

FRIDAY:

I miss my family. I miss my brothers and sisters. I miss the life I had there before I came to Lagos. Today, I’m thinking about how in Taraba, I just sleep and sleep. In the afternoon, my friends would call me for us to go out — we used to go out every day.

If someone had supported me, I’d have stayed back to graduate because I really like school. I just had to leave home. At a point, while I was at home, my uncle was starting to talk about marriage. The only thing my north people know is marriage, marriage, marriage. You’ll see a young girl like this, and she’s married. Me I’m not that kind of person. Many of them even end up going back to their parent’s house, so what’s the rush?

When you marry young, you don’t even get to know yourself. I tried to explain this to my uncle, but he was just choking me with questions: “Do you have a fiance? Do you know you’re getting old?” Me that I’m just 22.

I want to have my own business so when I’m married, things will not be hard for me. In this life, if you don’t have money, you’re a dry person. Money stops rubbish.

How old am I to be thinking of marriage? Right now, all I’m focusing on is my future.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

[donation]

Hassan Yahaya

November 10, 2020

Hustle

A week in the life of, Housemaid, houshelp, hustle
A Week In The Life: The Unemployed Caterer Cooking Up Big Dreams

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject of today’s “A Week In The Life” is a 24-year-old caterer who’s currently out of a job. He talks about how he lost his old job, losing his friend in the #EndSARS protest, the frustrations of unemployment and his plans for the future.

MONDAY:

I can’t breathe.

And to make things worse, my inhaler is empty. My chest is tight, and I feel like tearing my heart out. I can’t breathe.

Thankfully, my alarm wakes me up. I check my phone and it says 5 a.m. I’m having nightmares again. Normally, when I wake up by this time, I’d start preparing for work. However, after the incident of last week, I no longer have a job to go to.

My routine was: wake up, say my prayers, take a bath, brush and dash for work so that I could resume for 6:30 a.m. Every week, I’d work from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. on Mondays to Saturdays. This time last week, I was excited about the possibilities of working in a kitchen — I was looking to learn discipline, how to make the taste of food consistent and all the new cooking methods.

Sigh.

It all started on Wednesday or Thursday morning last week. I was at work cooking in a closed space with only a fan and an extractor when I had my asthma crisis. It was still morning, so I hadn’t started cooking deep. I don’t remember how I survived. The last time I had this type of crisis was when I was a child. I remember feeling a pinching pain and wanting to tear my heart out. I don’t remember how my inhaler finished. I could have sworn that I used it the night before and even shook the bottle to confirm that it still had “air” inside.

I vaguely remember my brother dashing down and taking me to a nearby pharmacy with a sympathetic pharmacist and overpriced medicines. My boss was so scared by the incident that he called his boss who told me to take some time off. The next two days, I was informed not to resume. They told me that I shouldn’t come back because it was unhealthy for an asthmatic patient to be working under their kitchen conditions.

It’s been almost a week, and I still have my alarm set for 5 a.m. My body needs some time to adjust to the new reality. Until then, I’m going to pray and maybe watch some anime. I’m not in any hurry.

TUESDAY:

I’m thinking about the recent #EndSARS protests today. Truth be told, I’m usually the first person you’ll see at these things. I’m that guy who carries chest and protests for people. Last year I was in a protest in my school where students were killed, and because I witnessed those deaths, I struggled to join in the EndSARS protest.

The fear of not wanting to die can make me come off as a coward, but I’ve lost a lot of people. And believe me, when you go, people will only miss you for a bit before they move on. They’ll remember you on some days, but that’s the limit — with time, dead people become forgotten history. If I die today, I want to be remembered for generations. I don’t want to be someone that you don’t know his name when you’re remembering the deaths of the 2020 protest. I don’t want to be part of “many people died.”

That fear didn’t allow me to join the protest. I was going out one day and saw some protesters. I joined and walked with them for 5-10 mins before boarding a bus to my destination. Not up to an hour after I left, I heard there was a shooting there.

The fear just came back again. Like this is what I was saying. There was also a shooting in Ebute Metta where they killed an old friend of mine. It was sad because he wasn’t a protester. He was just a casual observer working with the LNSC, and a stray bullet hit him. I only thought about him for two days before moving on with my life. I really don’t blame anyone that doesn’t go out.

We want Nigeria to be a better place, but there are many forces kicking against it. I don’t even have fancy dreams, I just want to be the best dad for my kids. Fighting for this country is part of the process but if I’m dead, how do I even father the children I’m fighting for?

WEDNESDAY:

This period of unemployment has made me happier because I’ve been able to reflect. I’ve realised that you’re alone at the end of the day. You were born alone, and you have to run your race alone.

Before I started the job I lost, I was always busy. I was catering for one event or another and the jobs were back to back, so I didn’t have time to breathe. But Corona scattered plans, and everything paused. Then I had to get a job. Now that I’m unemployed without a business to fall back on, everything is boring. I can’t complain. If I do, it’ll be like I’m rushing too much. Nobody understands that I don’t want to be a liability to other people. I’m willing to survive by doing other things — I recently started a courier service in Lagos where I help people transport goods from point A to B.

I see my peers and what they’re trying to do, and I’m just there sleeping and waking up. It’s easy to feel like I’ll soon be left behind. This period has given me time to evaluate and evolve. I’ve realised that everyone experiences times like this. Truth be told, I’ve experienced frustration, boredom and depression. But I’ve made a conscious decision to get out. Something as little as gratitude has been helpful for me.

I’ve gone from having my Monday to Saturday occupied to not having anything to do. I’ve gone from my mum saying: “You’re never at home,” “How’s work?” to her saying I haven’t done house chores.

It’s all good though. What matters is that I’m in a good place, for now.

THURSDAY:

I’m hopeful that I’ll get another job. A few people I worked for have promised me jobs at the end of the year. I’ve also been trying to follow up on them. Check-ins here and there. In the meantime, I’m trying to survive here and there. Today, I realised that I haven’t even opened my school books since protests and Corona started. Not because I don’t want to but because I wish not to. I’m not in that space mentally, and I have a weird relationship with school.

I attended two schools (but I didn’t finish) before attending this one. If I had certificates from one of them, shebi I’d have used it for work during this period. The only thing I have to show is my leaving school certificate. There are many jobs I feel I’m capable of but there’s no certificate to back up my claims. I have three years of an Engineering programme at a university, two years of the same Engineering program at a college of technology. In the past when I tried to apply to Engineering companies, they took me in as a labourer. I’m not saying I’m better than them, but I felt out of place — like an oddball.

I’m going to get my degree because I think I’ve suffered enough. When a soldier goes to war, he gets a medal of valour. My certificate is going to be my reward for what I’ve gone through. My catering will still be at the forefront, but the degree would be a useful addition; a safety net for times like this.

Compared to my mates, I haven’t lived. I want to travel. I want to go hiking, biking, mountain climbing. I want to live a stable life for my kids. Most importantly, I just want to live while I still have that crazy, youthful energy.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

Hassan Yahaya

October 27, 2020

Hustle

Caterer, hope, hustle, sars, Unemployment, work
“Men Try To Take Advantage Of Me” – A Week In The Life Of A Female Bouncer

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject of today’s A Week In The Life is Tope. She’s a bouncer and she talks about the stereotypes she faces at work, advances from men, and how difficult it is to be a bouncer during COVID.

MONDAY:

I woke up today thinking about the situation in Nigeria and I’m not happy. How is it possible that a graduate like me is still struggling?

I used to work as a secretary, but the money was not enough, so I got a security job. But Corona came, events got cancelled, and I was back to square one, back to struggling to make ends meet. The only good thing that came out of this mess is that I lost weight.

When Corona started and there were no security jobs, I decided to lose some weight. I shed weight [through anaerobic exercises like jumping] to avoid health issues and because I was starting to look older than my peers. I’d be going on the road with my friends and people would be asking if I was their aunty. Who’s your aunty, please?

At first, some people were worried that slimming down would affect my job. Me, I wasn’t. Although many bouncers have big bodies, the job requires intelligence — How can I assess a situation for threats? How can I prevent a situation from escalating? Things like that.

I was also banking on the fact that the name I had made in the industry would cover me. At least, some people knew me based on my past services. If all failed, my back up plan was to get hired as an ambassador for weight loss and I’d quit security. However, that hasn’t happened. Yet.

That’s why I’m here on a Monday morning thinking about my life. I need to shake off these thoughts so that my day can fully start.

TUESDAY:

What do you remember about your first day at your current job?

I remember being very passionate. My first boss was not harsh, so that made things easy for me. As a first-timer, I was put in charge of vendors at a wedding. My job was to prevent guests from going to the vendor’s side especially when they wanted to use the restroom. However, I had this one guest who gave me a tough time. After politely explaining why she could not pass, she threatened to slap me. She got so angry that I had to call my boss to save me. I was just quiet throughout her shouting because we are not allowed to talk back.

After the party, my boss commended me on how well I handled the incident. That’s how my confidence grew. I also got a mentor that gave me orientation for this job — he told me what to do, how to handle different types of guests and just general advice. One time, people were jealous because I used to get a lot of jobs, so he advised me to stop posting on social media and drawing attention to myself. He told me that as long as the right people knew me, I was fine. It’s been two years since I last posted about my job.

Another time, when people were spreading rumours about me sleeping with men for jobs, his belief in me was what kept me going. Every time I wanted to quit, he’d encourage me to stay. It is because of my mentor that I’m still on track in this job.

I’m remembering all this because I’m frustrated today. A job I was supposed to go for got cancelled. Corona is really spoiling things.

Let me go and talk to my mentor, maybe I’ll feel better.

WEDNESDAY:

When people hear bouncers, they think we’re fighters or troublemakers. That’s not true. A lot of our job involves brain and not brawn. Because we’re meant to keep the peace at events, we try not to employ violence that can scatter everything. You’ll never see a bouncer shocking [with a taser] someone at an event because that will scare everybody. Instead, we’re always calculating the best way to resolve issues without making a scene.

Another misconception people have is that we’re uneducated, and that’s why people look down on us. Or talk to us anyhow. In reality, a lot of us are educated. It’s just condition. At least, the job is far better than sitting at home doing nothing. I’ve come to accept that there’s no job without its own challenges.

I know that this job is not permanent for me. It’s until I find something better or further my studies. I finished from Yabatech and I still want to go to university, but it’s not easy combining this work with looking for admission. I’m just praying that it’ll come through.

Today, I won’t even kill myself thinking about these things because this life is one. I plan to spend the rest of my day relaxing.

THURSDAY:

One thing about this job is that I get a lot of advances. At work, I hear things like: “Wow, female bouncer. I’ve never seen a female bouncer before, and I like the way you’re kitted. I like your stature and all that.” Most times, it’s from men who are trying to take advantage of me. In their head, they see bouncers as poor people. They believe that if they promise me little things, I’ll fall for them. They want to use you while not doing anything for you.

The ones that don’t want to take advantage of me want me to quit my job. I’ve heard men say: “Ah, you’re doing a security job? No oh, you must quit.” The problem is that their head is not correct. Why would they tell me to quit? Did they provide an alternative for me?

In this life, nobody can feed you. Only if the person is your husband or your relative. Even still, it’s only after you have become somebody that people will appreciate you. I know that I can’t leave this job because of anyone. Unless I personally decide that I want to leave it. Because I’m not doing it for anyone.

You don’t like my job; can you provide me with a better one? If you can’t do that, bye-bye.

FRIDAY:

Today, I’m thinking about how tough the Corona period has been for me. For the first time, I can count how many jobs I have in a week. This is rare. Around this time [October] last year, I was fully booked until January of the next year. By now, I’d even be referring people for work. I’m just putting my faith in God that these last few months will be better. It’s looking like this year is for us to just thank God for life.

Corona is even favourable to people doing office work because, at the end of the month, something [salary] will still come in. For us, no work, no money. If you’re sick for one year, you’ll not get any money. The hustle is hard. One time, I had bad cramps and still had to show up at work. My boss was kind enough to put me on toilet duty where I wouldn’t be stressed. I was just standing and stretching throughout that event. There are no days off here.

During this Corona period, I started selling coconut oil and that’s what has been sustaining me. On the side, I also sell kits and equipment to bouncers as an extra source of income.

I’m just looking for the opportunity to leave Nigeria. Even if it’s just for one day. If I hustle the way I’m hustling here abroad, I’ll see changes. We don’t value our security in Nigeria. People look at you like, who are you?

I’m also looking forward to getting married to a very good person while I have a very good job. Someone that will support all my dreams. At the end of the day, I’m just looking for a better life. I can do any work. As far as money will come out.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

Hassan Yahaya

October 6, 2020

Hustle

A week in the life of, bouncer, hustle, security
10 Ways Attitude To Work Differs In The First Month VS After One Year

If you’ve ever worked a job for an extended period of time, then you’ll relate to this.

1) Punctuality:

First month: I must get to work early.

After one year: Let me sleep 30 minutes more. I’ll lie that police stopped me.

2) Attitude towards KPI:

First month: I must die for the company.

After one year: I can’t kill myself.

3) Attitude towards salary:

First month: Oh my God, this is a lot of money.

After one year: You people pay me peanuts for the amount of work I do.

4) Behavior at work:

First month: Hi.

After one year: My peeeeoooppleee! How una dey?

5) Attitude towards overtime:

First month: I’ll work public holidays and weekends.

After one year: Jesus died so we may live. I no do.

6) Toilet manners:

First month: I’m going to wash my hands in the toilet.

After one year: I dey go shit.

7) Gratitude level:

First month: This is a glorious opportunity.

After one year: It’s all a scam.

8) How you respond to “Do you love your job?”

First month: It’s the best thing ever.

After one year: We thank God. Once there’s life, there’s hope.

9) Attitude towards criticism at work:

First month: I must be perfect so they don’t find fault in my work.

After one year: No one ever died of insult.

10) Loyalty:

First month: I’m going to work here till I die.

After one year: In case you see anything, I’m open to new opportunities.

Did we miss anything? Let us know in the comments section.

Hassan Yahaya

September 14, 2020

Hustle

hustle, Life, work
6 Nigerians Reveal How They Discovered They Were Underpaid At Work

A huge part of life revolves around money yet we don’t talk about it. Especially when it comes to jobs and salaries. In the hope of demystifying this, I asked a couple of young Nigerians how they found out they were underpaid.

Here’s what they said:

Enny/Female/20s.

I did a job for a client where I charged ₦300,000. Then I found out from talking to a friend that I could have billed ₦500,000 – ₦600,000. See, I wanted to cry because the job stressed me. I truly wanted the job because of the client profile but last last there was NDA so wetin we gain?

Knowledge is a weird thing. You can be earning ₦10,000 and be okay but when you realise that you can earn ₦50,000 for doing the same thing, you become disturbed.

Kosi/Female/20s.

One guy hit me up asking for an illustration. He did all the usual begging and beating down of my price. I accepted because I was like let me do him a favour – I’m kind like that.

It’s funny because after I started the job, it suddenly hit me that I had agreed for a much lower price than he first agreed. Like, he agreed for a price, and still beat it down. Like say na jazz. Anyway, midway through the job I realized that it was for a big project for some celebrity and he was just the middleman, giving me peanuts from the entire thing. It pained me die, I can’t even lie.

Igiri/Male/30+

I was being paid ₦70,000 (65 after tax) to write 5 stories daily. You know, real sweat shop shit. And it felt like a lot because that was my first ever job fresh out of University.

Then I started meeting people in the same line of work and I found out how much they were earning. It made me weak. Even worse, my boss at the time was a super shitty person. Like, I’m talking shitty-for-no-reason-Nollywood-villain-type-shitty.

Hameed/Male/20s.

I always feel underpaid especially as a doctor in Nigeria. Since the first day I saw how much doctors in Canada earn, it made me feel cheated and underappreciated.

Tayo/Male/20s.

I don’t know if this is ethical but I was sleeping with the accountant at my office. One day we had a fight and she just dropped it: “It’s because you don’t have sense, that’s why your colleagues earn more than you.”

I was like what???

I can’t even lie, that one entered. In fact, I still hate that girl till today. The funniest part is that I still work in that company and no, I haven’t asked for a raise. Not because I don’t want to but because I don’t know how to.

Ebere/Female/20s.

I remember complaining at work about how broke I was. One of my male colleagues was now like: “I know right. This ‘insert money almost twice mine’ they are paying is not enough.

My head first scattered. I was like: “They’re paying you that!?!?!?!?”

Let me not lie to you, when I found out that I was being underpaid, I actually took a brief moment to breathe and scream into a void.

Editor’s note: Names have been changed to protect the identities of the subjects.

Hassan Yahaya

September 10, 2020

Money

hustle, Job, salary, work
A Week In The Life: The Eye Doctor Who Doesn’t See Herself Practising For Long

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject of today’s “A Week In The Life” is an optometrist. She debunks the myth that glasses correct eyesight, she gives us tips for healthy eyesight and tells us why she doesn’t see a future for herself in her profession.

MONDAY:

These days, I don’t have a fixed time to wake up because it depends on when I sleep. And I sleep at any time because I’m presently in-between jobs. However, on most days, when I sleep at midnight, I wake up by 7 am.

Today, when I wake up at 7, the first thing I do is try to plan my day. If I was working, I’d have woken up by 5:30 am 0r 6:00 am so as to beat Lagos traffic. Thankfully, those days are behind me.

As an optometrist, a typical clinic day involves assessing patients. A patient comes in and you do a comprehensive eye test. You take patient history, examine the patient’s eyes with a pen torch or an ophthalmoscope (this helps to check the back of the eyes). Then, depending on the patient’s complaints, signs and symptoms (redness of eyes or an injury, or disease), you’d either first treat those symptoms or refract the patient.

Refracting the patient means checking the lens power that’s suitable for the patient to see well. And to find out what the patient can also tolerate because you can give a powerful lens that makes the patient see really well but they aren’t comfortable with it. They can’t walk because the ground either appears too high or low. Or the lens gives them a headache. Many times, we have to reduce the clarity to make the patients feel comfortable. For example, for patients who don’t read, there’s no point refracting them to the highest clarity especially if it makes them uncomfortable with their environment. So, I ask patients their occupation to determine what kind of lens to give them.

All these things don’t matter for now. My major goal for today is to structure my day in a way that’s productive. But before I continue thinking, I need to eat. I don’t want to faint over anything.

TUESDAY:

Yesterday was productive, but today, not so much. I’ve spent a large part of today daydreaming. Like now, I’m remembering one patient that was brought to the clinic by his parents. An 8-year-old boy who, according to his father, was very stubborn. One day, while the dad was flogging the boy, the cane mistakenly touched the child’s eye. On examination of the eye, we realised that the lens had changed position. That is, the lens was no longer in its normal place.

When we checked the eye pressure, it was 50 something and normal eye pressure is between 10-21 mmHg. The boy had already lost his vision. To preserve what was left of the eye, we referred the boy for emergency surgery. Even after the surgery, his sight never returned.

On days like this, I can’t help but imagine how the father feels. I don’t know if he’ll ever forgive himself. Does he wonder that perhaps if he had controlled his anger, his son would still have two functional eyes?

I’m starting to think myself into sadness again. I’m going to sleep and try to restart my day after I wake up.

WEDNESDAY:

People are funny sha. Today, a friend texted me asking for “free” tips to take care of his eyes. The person didn’t even offer money for consultation but because I’m nice, I told him some things.

The fundamental rule is that you shouldn’t put just anything in your eye. Also, if you use makeup regularly and realise that you are allergic to a particular product, it’s advisable to discontinue it. For people with a family history of glaucoma (not everyone might know), it’s advisable to go to an eye clinic once every year. This is to help in early detection and control of the disease because it has no cure. Glaucoma causes nerve damage in the eyes, which can’t be restored when lost, so early detection is the best bet to slowing its progression.

People who stare at computers all day are advised to practise the 20-20-20 rule. That is, for every 20 minutes, you should look at something 20 feet (Editor’s note: 20 feet is as tall as a giraffe or about two and a half times as tall as an artificial Christmas tree) away for 20 seconds. The computer is always in your face, therefore you should look away at intervals.

If that isn’t possible, then the next step should be anti-reflective lenses. These help to reduce the strain on the eye because of the light from the screens of computers. Additionally, for UV light, sunglasses are recommended for everyone because UV light can cause a lot of damage to the eye. A lot of people think that sunglasses are for fashion but you’re actually protecting your eyes by wearing them.

The most important tip I gave him was that people shouldn’t wait until there’s a problem before visiting the clinic. People should try to check their eyes regularly once a year and shouldn’t see it as a waste of money. Especially in cases like glaucoma (also known as the silent thief of sight), where you wouldn’t detect it until it’s too late.

I should have charged him for the consultation. Another time will come.

THURSDAY:

One of the biggest misconceptions people have is that glasses are meant to fix your eyesight. They are not.

For issues like myopia/short-sightedness (where you can’t see things that are far away) what happens is that images meant to be formed on the retina are formed in front of it. In hyperopia/farsightedness (where you can’t see close images), the image is formed at the back of the retina. While there are many reasons why this happens, the common symptom is that vision at this point is blurry.

So, how will a piece of glass change how your eyes are? What glasses do is that they manipulate the light coming into your eyes to fall on the retina so that you can see clearly. A child’s prescription changes because their eyes are developing. Even for adults, their eyes sometimes change. It doesn’t mean that glasses cure you; they just help. It’s like saying wheelchair cures paralysis, it doesn’t. It’s only an aid. Some of these conditions are progressive so most people have to change their glasses every two years. Other times, it’s regressive so you also need to adjust your lens accordingly.

Factors like diabetes and hypertension also affect vision. If your blood sugar shoots up, there can be sudden blurred vision. There are times patients complain about blurry vision, and I ask them to check their blood sugar. Some say the range is high, so I don’t give them anything because once the blood sugar level comes down, the refractive index (how fast light enters the eye) changes and the lens is wasted. In cases like that, the solution is usually to get their blood sugar under control.

The issue of glasses needing a change every time is not our fault. The refractive state of your eyes can change at any time. And because the glasses are for only one state, the glasses will have to be changed when the refractive state changes.

This is what I spent my whole day doing: convincing someone that optometrists aren’t out to cheat them.

FRIDAY:

Optometry struggles as a profession in Nigeria because it’s not well known and the pay is low. A lot of people come to the eye clinic and don’t even know what optometry is. They just refer to me as an eye doctor. For people that even know, they don’t really understand the scope of what the job entails. Every time I tell someone I’m an optometrist, I have to explain what I do.

Having to explain all the time can be tiring. I think one of the reasons optometry is not really known is because, in Nigeria, we have over 170 universities and only about seven offer optometry. Even people who attended schools offering the course with me still don’t know what we are doing.

One time, a patient asked if I was an optometrist or an ophthalmologist, and I had to explain the difference. Then the person was like: “Why would you spend 6 years on that? Why didn’t you just go for ophthalmology instead?” For people like me who didn’t choose it as a first choice, it’s always very hurtful. It’s like a reminder that I made a mistake when it’s not the reality.

Another thing is that in clinical practice, there is no clear hierarchy like in medicine where you can become a consultant and charge some kind of money. We don’t have that option. There’s not a lot of difference between someone who has been working for the past 20 years and someone who has been working for 5. You don’t have much to make you invaluable. You can’t even threaten to leave because there’s a newer, younger replacement for you.

Today, I can’t help but imagine my ideal future — a satisfying job where I feel like I’m making a difference in the world. It also involves having my own family and living a quiet life.

Editor’s note: The images used were taken randomly from the internet as the subject wanted anonymity.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

Hassan Yahaya

September 8, 2020

Money

A week in the life of, hustle, optometrist, professional
A Week In The Life: The Online Sex Worker Who Hates Her Body

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject of today’s “A Week In The Life” is an online sex worker in her early twenties. She talks about hating her body, the Nigerian factors like NEPA that affect her work, and her biggest fear of one day getting exposed.

MONDAY:

I’m up by 3 am every day. I don’t say wake up because I have no choice in the matter. I get up early because my audience lives in the USA and 3 am in Nigeria is their midnight. At midnight, they are all awake and horny. So, once I’m awake, I start pushing out content (pictures and videos) to my abroad subscribers until like 6, 7 am. Once I’m done, I go back to sleep until around noon.

Today, after waking up and showering by noon, my day resumes. I’m not filming so I decide to do promos (a discount on my OnlyFans content) on Twitter and Reddit. I schedule my promo to around 3 pm Nigerian time because that’s when the Americans wake up so this ensures that they see me. These promos, especially on Twitter, help to keep engagements up and get new subscribers. I also reply to one or two messages because it’s important to interact with current subscribers while trying to get new ones.

The Reddit promo stresses me out because Reddit is a rabbit hole. Like today that I’ve decided to focus on Reddit promo, I’m ignoring everything else for the next 2hrs to do it well.

How Reddit works is that you have to find different subreddits to post in. Sometimes, you have to search with keywords. Sometimes you have to check other girls’ pages; girls that look like you. I can’t post in a subreddit where they want skinny girls (I’m not skinny), I can’t post where they want tight tits (I have saggy breasts), I can’t post where they want light-skinned girls ( I’m dark-skinned). So, I have to search for keywords. For example, there’s a subreddit called “chubby” that has 200,000 members so girls like me can post there. There’s another one called “ass” that has almost 200k members where you just go to post your ass. But Reddit also has rules – some subreddits don’t allow you to sell content while others are specifically for selling. Some won’t allow you to post a picture with your watermark in it so I have a folder for pictures without my watermark for those.

Some have no rules so you can do whatever you like. I like the ones without rules because I can manipulate it however I want — I can advertise my work and put whatever caption I want without the fear of getting banned.

The only upside is that Reddit subscribers are profitable. A lot of big tippers and people who are into fetish come from Reddit. And because fetish videos are expensive, they give me tips. So, this makes it worth it.

So, I plan to keep searching groups and posting links until midnight. Then I’ll sleep because by 3 am, I go again.

TUESDAY:

Today, I start my promo a lot earlier because it’s Titty Tuesday and everyone loves Titty Tuesday. I have to get my post ready so I can post under some babe’s thread. She’s the organizer of this movement and because she has over 400k followers this means that I’ll get a lot of engagement. I always make sure to send her my post early so she can add it to her thread.

People ask me how I’m comfortable sending pictures of myself but I tell them that I’ve always wanted to do OnlyFans. I think that it’s a talent I’ve always had. Initially, when I started, my content was lazy. But then I started looking at other girls and I realised that if I wanted to do this, I had to pick up the pace.

Another worry I had at the beginning was that someone would identify me, but no face, no case. Plus after a while, people learn to mind their business. Only my closest friends know what I do and as long as I have their support, no one else exists.

All the time people come up to say “You’re the one in the photos” but I always throw my face away. Once you throw away your face, they will not have the audacity to ask again.

Another thing that keeps me going is that there is potential to cash out. I have friends that are crazy successful from this and this is their main job. Anything can happen, as long as I keep grinding, I’ll keep seeing results. Even when it seems slow, or sad, I just have to keep going. Sometimes when I get frustrated, I remember my British friend who made $3000- $4000 in July and made almost $20,000 in August. Even though I recently started and things are slow, I know that there’s potential for me to start earning six to seven figures if I put in the work.

Thinking about these things is what makes me look for the best pose to take photos so I can send my entry for Titty Tuesday. There’s money to be made, please.

WEDNESDAY:

One thing doing this job has shown me is that I’m very open to fetishes. More open than even I thought. Sometimes, I’m the one that suggests things. I understand that it might not be the same for other people because you have to consider a lot of things. However, a lot of people have fetishes that I also share so it’s a win-win for me. Additionally, fetish content is very expensive especially videos of you acting out the fetish.

I charge per minute for fetish videos. It helps that I have a price list for specific fetishes, unlike other girls who size customers up and price them. So that makes my subscribers happy.

Today, I’m making a custom (we agreed on a fetish) video that’s supposed to be three minutes long. All I can say is that it involves recording myself doing a very specific fetish. The better I get at these videos, the more the possibility of making between $90 – $150 for 3-minute videos.

However, NEPA wants to ruin my vibe. We haven’t had light all day so I can’t record anything. My phone battery is low and coupled with the sound of my neighbour’s gen, I can’t do anything. I definitely don’t want generator noise in my background because I don’t like when things aren’t right.

I’m going to spend the day apologising to the client and I’ll even give a discount for the stress.

I need to distract myself from all these thoughts so I’m going to watch Fat Dog Mendoza to pass time before Nigeria frustrates my enemy.

THURSDAY:

My biggest challenge with this job is showing my body. I know that it sounds like a paradox but I struggle with body dysmorphia. This also manifests as social anxiety. I don’t like being outside because I feel that my body is ugly and hideous. Sometimes if I have to go somewhere, I start crying. I think that if I go out, people will see my ugliness. I know that it’s weird doing this work and feeling this way but it’s a daily struggle that I can’t help. I often get so sad and don’t want to work.

Even when I’m filming, there are some things I try not to do because I think my body is ugly in an outfit. When I get a scar or something, I get really insecure. One time, I got a scar on my belly from shaving and for a week, I didn’t post anything that showed my belly. I haven’t taken an ass pic in a month or two because I don’t like how my back rolls look. Also, I have cellulite on my ass and I don’t like how they look in photos. Another time, I went for two months without taking breast pics because I felt my breasts were too saggy and I didn’t want to see them. Sometimes, when I want to take titty pics, I hold them up with my hands to feel better with myself.

I haven’t taken pictures sitting down because I feel my hips won’t pop out. Struggling mentally and doing this work is really hard. I’m constantly scrutinizing my photos. I zoom in on my picture and say what if someone is looking at this scar or those rolls. The reality is that many times, I’m the only one noticing these things. There are times I start going “Oh my God, my content is trash. Oh my God, my content is trash.” Throughout last week, I didn’t open my OnlyFans feed because I didn’t like how I looked in any video. Like sometimes you’ll be sad and you just have to keep going. Thankfully, I’m not alone, some other girls doing this work also feel this way.

Sex work also saved me from drug dependency and alcoholism. Usually, I’d be drunk or high to get away from sadness. But when I’m drunk or high, I’m inefficient and can’t work. If I don’t work that means I can’t earn so I’ve been way more sober due to having to work[hehe].

Today, I feel sad and can’t do anything. I can’t do promos on Twitter or Telegram so I’m just going to lay in bed. The only difference now is that instead of escaping and not doing anything, I’ll brainstorm. If I’m going to be sad and not do anything, I might as well plan my content strategy for when my mental health break is over.

Who no work, no go chop.

FRIDAY:

Nigerians living in Nigeria are terrible towards online sex workers. Today, I think of how hurtful this is because I have no community. The abroad guys are accepting of us but there are still differences even when we are in group chats. Many of the girls in this group are white so there’s a disconnect. White girls have it one hundred times easier and being black makes you accept the fact that some people will automatically decide not to fuck with you. Our realities are just too different and they can’t relate. It’s easy to feel alone — how many Nigerians are doing this on an international scale? I only know of like two other people on Twitter. And to be honest, in this industry where everyone is busy chasing the bag, there’s no time for many many.

I remember one time my friend (who does OnlyFans) hinted about her potential earnings in an article. She just said you can make up to four figures in dollars and Nigerians started reporting her account. She got locked out of her account for two days. I just advised her to unfollow and block everyone she followed from Nigerian Twitter. And that she should start integrating herself into abroad Twitter. When I started doing this, I knew that I wasn’t working in Twitter NG space so I just blocked half of them because they were body-shaming me. Sometimes, I just see a random Nigerian account and I’ll just be like fuck off and block it. It’s just bad vibes and negative energy. You can’t actually survive in this climate with people that hate you for no reason when you’re not doing anything to them. They just hate you for no reason. Let me not lie, sometimes I tell people that I’m Ghanaian because Nigerians hate my existence.

Sometimes I get anxiety attacks. I have nightmares. Getting my identity revealed is my biggest fear. My real name out there on the internet. American girls will get their content leaked and move on but I don’t know what will happen to me.

But if I start thinking, I won’t do anything. If you find something you love, I think you should do it. As long as you’re not hurting anyone and your conscience is clear.

SATURDAY

I don’t work much on weekends. So, today I try to stretch out as much as I can. I also need a break. I’m going to do Telegram promo and that’s the worst of them. I legit need to hire an assistant to do that for me because it’s so hard.

It’s because of how difficult this work can get that I want a partner who’s loving and accepting of me. I see a lot of girls like me who have boyfriends and husbands that love them for who they are. I know I can’t settle for less when I see girls like me being valued. I know a girl that makes content with her boyfriend. One time, they did a thread on sex workers and their partners and how long they have been together – I saw people who had been together for 5 – 6 years and I saw love and acceptance.

Some of these girls, their boyfriends do their filming, planning and budgeting for them. I also know someone who’s married doing this work whose husband is an engineer. So imagine seeing all that genuine love, you definitely won’t settle for less or for anyone that will be talking to you anyhow. These decisions become easier because you now have your own money on top.

Thinking about this again, I’ve made up my mind that I don’t need anyone’s approval to follow my dreams.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

Hassan Yahaya

September 1, 2020

Money

body confidence, hustle, Nigeria, sexwork
A Week In The Life: The Vet. Doctor Who’s Sick And Tired Of Human Beings

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject for today is Dr Asekun Ajibola, a veterinary doctor. He talks about being frustrated with the elders in his profession, the hidden dangers with the meat we consume, and his ticket out of all this mess.

MONDAY:

I wake up by 5:30 am on most days. Sometimes when I’m extremely tired, like today, I don’t stand up until 6 am. After leaving my bed, I do some house chores and then iron my shirt for the day. I’m lucky that I live only 30 minutes away from work, so, when I’m done having my bath and dressing up, I still have time. I resume work by 8 am and it’s just 7 am, so I decide to pass the time by reading. As a veterinary doctor, it’s important to read every day if you want to avoid disgrace. Many people who bring their pets to the clinic have already googled their pets’ symptoms extensively and it’ll be embarrassing if you can’t answer their questions. Also, as a result of the ignorance surrounding this profession in Nigeria, we constantly have to prove ourselves.

You’ll hear people say that they’ve never been to a vet clinic before or that they didn’t know it existed. You’ll also hear people ask how can they keep pets or afford my services when they haven’t eaten well themselves? I’m used to these things so I just shrug it off. It doesn’t take away from the fact that I enjoy my job. For me, the best part of my job is trying to deduce what’s wrong with an animal. Everyone knows that animals can’t speak so you just have to observe the animal and ask the owner questions. Sometimes, we discover that owners are not observant and they don’t know what’s going on. Figuring out what’s wrong with the animal with little or no help at all always makes me feel like a superstar.

I’ll never forget the day that they brought a monkey to the hospital. It had been stooling and vomiting and for a while. The little guy was weak and at some point, we lost him. I remember having to do chest compressions to manually pump his heart back to life. It was a big deal for me because, before that incident, I’d never treated a monkey. Obviously, we read about them and wrote exams on them, but I’d never had that practical feel.

I remind myself to stop daydreaming and focus on my reading. Because of the nature of my job, I can’t predict how my day will be. It’s better to read what I can now because once I’m done, my day officially begins.

TUESDAY:

When I tell people that I’m a vet, the first thing they want to know is if I’ve been chased by a dog before. I tell them that the answer is yes. And they always sound surprised. I don’t know if people think that because I’m a vet, the dog automatically knows so it won’t chase me. The dog thing is even a stereotype because we also treat birds, fishes, rabbits, all kinds of animals — how many people do I want to tell? I just indulge them and tell them my story of being chased by a dog.

It was after my NYSC and I was trying to hustle some money. A friend reached out to me that someone needed to vaccinate her dog who had missed his routine vaccine. I agreed to go because I needed the cash. On getting to her house, the dog [caucasian breed] was already barking and wrangling the cage. I told the lady to hold her dog well and she agreed. She brought the dog out and hooked the chain to its collar. I don’t know what happened, maybe she wasn’t holding the dog well, but it slipped from her hand.

Our senior colleagues had told us several times to ask for an escape route once we get to a client’s house. For some reason, that day, I totally forgot.

As the dog charged towards me, adrenaline spiked in my body. There was a tree inside the house that till today, I don’t know how I jumped on. I can’t explain how I was able to jump that high. I stood on the branches looking down.

The girl was like “are you not a veterinarian?” and I was very angry. Does the dog know that one? If a dog is coming at you furiously, what kind of training do you expect them to give us in school to overcome that situation? I had to tell her to calm her dog down.

I instructed her on how to wear a mouth guard for the dog and I didn’t approach until the dog was properly restrained. Since that time, it’s always at the back of my mind. Anytime I go to someone’s house, I’m always like “bro/lady, please leave the door open. Don’t lock it so that if anything happens, I can run.” You can lose your life because some dogs are wicked and they’ll go straight to your neck where your jugular vein is located. If they bite down, you’re dead. Assuming you’re in a country with good medical facilities, you can still survive. But in Nigeria? – There’s no reward for bravery. Your life’s on the line and you have to be careful.

All these are not my problem for now. My problem today is getting to work because I am tired.

WEDNESDAY:

I’m working late today. Ideally, I get off work by 6 pm. But someone brought in their pet by 5:50 pm so we had to stay back to treat. It was an emergency where we had to perform surgery. It’s sad that even though I work 8 am – 6 pm from Monday to Saturday, and sometimes, even Sunday, my profession is not recognised in this country. The job takes so much of your time, and you sacrifice so much, but you get nothing in return.

The case of veterinarians in this country is pathetic and discouraging. As a vet, how many youths know about us? How many people have visited the clinic? There are a lot of things we are lacking in this profession. When you finish school, the surest route is to become a lecturer because you know that you’d get paid reasonably well, or you go into private practice. Some people who run farms and big poultry farms will employ like three vets to monitor and diagnose diseases and even formulate feeds.

Veterinary medicine is wide, but in Nigeria, the opportunities are limited. Vets are supposed to be a part of food safety – For example, in abattoirs where they kill cows for their meat, there are so many zoonotic diseases that can be gotten from animals. Vets ensure that meat not fit for human consumption is flagged. In this country, if they condemn your cattle because the animal is diseased (it has a communicable disease) the government is supposed to compensate the farmer at least 60% of the worth of the animal. But nobody will compensate you in this country. A lot of times when vets condemn the meat and bury it, the farmers will go to where it’s buried to fetch it so they can sell. In some cases, to prevent this from happening, the vet will compensate the farmer out of pocket.

If you’re working in a hospital or abattoir, you work every day. So, there’s literally no break and it’s just like human medics. You can’t plan your schedule because you can’t plan sickness. People can bring their pets anytime.

It’s very annoying because some of the older colleagues meant to be fighting for us are only fighting for their pockets. As long as they are getting paid higher than human medic[doctors], they are happy and they don’t care what’s going on. However, we still have some fighting for us despite everything. If you ask a young vet for their plan, you’ll hear that they either want to become lecturers or get employed by the Ministry. If none of this happens, there’s no future. Whenever I see human medics [medical doctors] who have a thousand times the opportunity we have leaving this country, I just shake my head for my profession. Thankfully, we have the japa route and that’s what people are now looking at.

What me I’m looking at is time. I just want to finish documenting this treatment plan so I can go home, turn on Netflix and just chill with my Blacklist series.

THURSDAY:

Today, at work, I can’t help but think about Nigeria. I keep thinking about the fact we’re in trouble and many people don’t even realise it. For example, a high percentage of the meat we consume has antibiotic residue in it. This is because cattle are mostly reared by people who don’t understand the implication of things. What happens is that these people treat their animals with antibiotics like metronidazole [flagyl] which is banned in animals meant for consumption. The worst part now is that they treat animals with these drugs a day before they are meant for slaughter. There’s not enough withdrawal period for the drug to leave the animal’s body so the drug stays in the meat. This is where vets are supposed to come in because we have kits that can detect these residues in dead animals. But then, you’ll see that a state like Lagos which slaughters the most amount of cattle per day has like only 8 – 12 vets on its payroll. How do you now expect these people to monitor everywhere? It’s even worse because poultry animals are also given these antibiotics and those ones can be slaughtered anywhere. At least cattles are still slaughtered at the abattoir.

Maybe when we say we’re not feeling fine and we need some antibiotics to help us feel better, they’ll say we are resistant to them. The sad part is that it’s as a result of what we are eating because people don’t value our services. But, will I now say that I won’t eat?

In fact, let me go and eat because it’s time for lunch. Thank God that the work is light today.

FRIDAY:

Today, I wake up tired. I’m always tired but I still have to show up at work. I remind myself that it will get better and the situation won’t be like this forever. I am sure because I am hardworking and I don’t give up.

It’s just sad that I spent 6 – 7 years in school [including strikes] alternating between clinics, class, internships, and studying. There was no time for anything else. Only to come out and realise that I don’t have any other skill outside of my certificate. In an ideal society, a certificate should be an optimal meal ticket until the day you die. You shouldn’t need to stress yourself about trying other things unless you want to. I believe that as a vet, your job should be able to afford you the basic needs in society. However, that’s not the case here: Many times, if you don’t have any other skill and you’ve expended all your energy getting the certificate, you just have to die on the line in this profession.

Another alternative for many of us is school admission so we can leave. With the way things are going in this country, it’s a surprise that vets still exist at all. Obviously, I’m not really surprised because we are trained to be versatile. That’s why we are all trying to learn new skills no matter how hard it is.

Personally, the skill I’m learning is to japa; to get out. The hope that it’ll get better kills Nigerians faster than anything. On the one hand, a little part of me is hopeful that things will get better. On the other hand, I’ll also like to go somewhere where people know my worth, I’m comfortable, and they appreciate me. My work should speak for me and I shouldn’t have to struggle for recognition every time. I’m still looking forward to a Nigeria where people recognise vets and give us the respect we deserve.

All this won’t matter if I don’t get up from this bed. I have to rush because I’m running late for work.

Editor’s note: Dr Ajibola says the 8-12 vets in Lagos is an estimate and may not necessarily be the reality.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

Hassan Yahaya

August 25, 2020

Hustle

cattle, hustle, Jaapa, Meat, Nigeria, vet
A Week In The Life: My Love For Talking Saves Me From Practicing Medicine

“A Week In The Life” is a weekly Zikoko series that explores the working-class struggles of Nigerians. It captures the very spirit of what it means to hustle in Nigeria and puts you in the shoes of the subject for a week.

The subject for today’s “A Week In The Life” is a doctor currently waiting for his youth service. He talks about choosing not to practice medicine, discovering his love for entertainment, and why he shows up every day.

MONDAY:

On most days, I typically wake up by 8 am but I don’t stand up from the bed until 9 am. I’m currently in the phase between finishing my mandatory house job program and waiting for NYSC so I have some ‘free’ time. I say ‘free’ because the coronavirus and the lockdown are delaying me from going to NYSC camp. All I can do is wait patiently for the government to say something. Anything at all. Even if it’s that they cancelled the 3 weeks orientation camp so that I can just start NYSC and move on with my life. However, since they aren’t saying anything, I’m trying to make the best use of this period.

This period is depressing for me in two ways: Firstly, because there are no events happening, I can’t host shows. I can’t entertain and make people happy as I normally would. I’m a master of ceremonies and I enjoy making people happy and shutting down shows. Secondly, because of the lockdown, I can’t go for service, so this makes me feel stuck. To prevent idleness, I’ve gotten a remote job as a health consultant on an app. where I interact with patients and give health tips. I’ve also started hosting some radio and TV shows as an in-house doctor where I talk about common sports injuries. Additionally, I’ve also dived into content creation for my social media and Youtube channels.

Today, after sorting out food and running some errands, I’m going to focus on creating content for those channels. I plan to finish today but if I can’t, I’ll roll it over to tomorrow. Whatever happens, I must be done creating by Tuesday evening because Wednesdays through Fridays are for shooting videos. I really can’t wait to see what I come up with.

TUESDAY:

I didn’t finish creating content yesterday so I’m continuing today. Even though I appreciate that I have time to do what I love, I’m starting to consider getting a proper 9 -5. Only my remote job pays me a salary and that’s barely sustaining me these days. For now, the television and radio gigs I’m doing are mostly out of passion and not because of money. If it was because of the money, I’d have quit a long time ago.

I once swore that I could no longer practise clinical medicine but these days, as things are getting tighter, I’m starting to entertain the thought. In the past, when I hear anything clinically related, I’d just turn off like engine. When my classmates advertise locum jobs, I’d un-look. However, these days I find myself asking if I’m sure that I don’t need that extra ₦5,000. Now, I look at job opportunities and feel bad for not taking it. I just hope it doesn’t reach the stage where I’ll have to take one of these jobs because I have no interest at all. I need to shake off these thoughts and focus. Pre-COVID, I’d not have been bothered because I always had an event every other weekend and that made me enough money to keep pushing it.

I’m doubling down on creating my content plan today because tomorrow is shoot day. I have to make sure that everything is good to go. In the middle of this, I also plan to cook my favourite food of Jollof rice and white beans because, at the end of the day, I can’t kill myself.

WEDNESDAY:

I’m up early today because my show starts by 8:30 am. I have my bath, get ready, and quickly rush down to the radio station. My show ends by 9:30 am and once I’m done, I head over to shoot my videos. I work with a management team for the videos so they handle all the production and heavy lifting. After all the stress of the shooting is done, we take pictures, play games and just chill.

I’ve had an extremely productive day.

THURSDAY:

Today, I’m not going anywhere so that I can save my t-fare. Money is tight so I have to plan my outings well. I’m reminiscing about how much I miss being an M.C and t’s funny how I got started on this path.

In my final year of medical school, I was confused about what to do with my life so I started asking around. I was sure that I didn’t want clinical medicine but I didn’t know what I wanted. Luckily, I read a book by Teju Babyface – Secrets Of The Streets and that motivated me to explore this path. In the book, Teju listed characteristics of an MC and I fit the description perfectly. However, it was still not an easy journey because coming from my medical background to entertainment was hard. It was difficult to find people with a similar background. Thankfully, I met a mentor called Dr Hakeem who put me through. He took me around and taught me the ropes of the business and I’m forever indebted to him.

I’ll never forget the first big event I hosted which was a wedding. After a while doing free shows and ₦10,000 – ₦30,000 shows, I decided to shoot my shot and charge ₦100,000 for a wedding. In my mind, I was like they’d price me down to ₦30,000 and I’d still kill the show. I remember the groom saying that the price was too much but he could only afford ₦75,000. I put on a straight face along with big English. I was like “this is below my usual rate but because of the circumstance under which we met and who introduced you, I’ll do it. I consider you family.” But in my head, I was asking myself who sent me message. Immediately, the groom left like this, I called my mentor [Dr Hakeem] to cry on the phone that I had bitten more than I could chew. That I overpromised even though I’d never hosted a wedding alone before. He ended up calming me down and coaching me on what to do. From the day they paid my fee till the wedding, I couldn’t sleep because I kept on asking myself who sent me message. I’m sure that my blood pressure went up during that period.

To further worsen things, my final year medical exams were moved to the weekend of the wedding. Exams in medical school are split into one week of theory and one week of practical/oral exams. Initially, the wedding was supposed to be two days after my final exams and that’s why I took it. Then, exams got moved by a week so the wedding fell on the weekend after the theory exam and just before the practical exam.

I couldn’t sleep and I also couldn’t refund the money because I had spent it. It was like my village people were out to finally get me.

Somehow, I found a way to do it. Immediately after my last theory exam for that week[on a thursday], I started preparing for the wedding which was on that Saturday. I had barely one day to do all of the runnings. At the wedding, I was so scared because my mind kept on going back to my books. My mates were studying for exam while I was jumping up and down. I remember that I wore a grey suit that was soaked with sweat. Not from the jumping, but out of fear. At the end of the day, I did the wedding, killed it, and ran back to school to continue studying. To add to my win, I passed my exam in one sitting which also shocked a lot of people.

I learned a valuable lesson from that incident- If you don’t try some things, you’ll never know what can come out from it. You just need to be brave. I think that lesson is part of why I’m still pushing it during this period even though things are not so smooth.

All this thinking is exhausting, I’m going to spend the rest of the day doing what I truly love, which is sleeping. Tomorrow, I go again.

FRIDAY:

I’m on my way to the studio this morning. I have a show on T.V from 10 – 11 am. After that, I’m going on the radio by 11 am where I’m going to talk about sports injuries. I do all these because my end goal is to combine these skills into opening a media house focused on health communications. The space is relatively untapped and I hope to be a pioneer. Since I have no plans to leave the country, this is my way of showing up. I’m hopeful that everything will add up and by the time I’m forty, I’ll be close to achieving that reality.

It’s scary sometimes thinking about it because, at the end of the day, na money be fine bobo. All these things must translate to living a comfortable life. At least let me be able to sustain my family and plan. The world is moving away from certificates to talents – If I can keep putting in the hard work, taking short courses, creating relationships, and learning from people, I’m sure that it’ll pay off. It also helps that I am very fluid. I might have dreams that are in pillars but they are not fixed. If something comes up tomorrow and based on available information, I feel that’s the next step that’ll benefit me, I’ll dive into it.

For now, all I can do is control the present.

As at today, I’m just praying that the government re-opens event centres. Abeg, let events just come back. Even if they give me mic say make I stand for road dey shout. I go take am. I have missed events – That dressing up, looking good, having fun and collecting money. I’ve missed it so much and it has affected me.

I can’t wait for things to return to normal.

Check back every Tuesday by 9 am for more “A Week In The Life ” goodness, and if you would like to be featured or you know anyone who fits the profile, fill this form.

Hassan Yahaya

August 18, 2020

Hustle

A week in the life of, doctor, emcee, hustle, MC