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BNXN | Zikoko!
  • 12 Nigerian Lyrics Your Mother Would Allow You Tattoo on Your Body

    It’s common knowledge that Nigerian parents don’t like tattoos, but what if we told you there are some Nigerian lyrics they’d actually want you to have as tattoos?

    Let’s get into it. 

    The chorus of Kizz Daniel’s Buga 

    If there’s one thing we learnt in 2022, it’s that Nigerian mummies and aunties love Kizz Daniel’s Buga. It’s like Baby Shark, but for 40+ women who love WhatsApp. It’ll be hard for your mum to say “no” to a tattoo of her favourite song. Try “So far, so good. Ko ni baje” first and see. 

    “Jesu Kristi loba wa” — Sability by Ayra Starr

    A tattoo that shows your mum she raised a good child who stans Jesus and Ayra Starr? Come on, there’s no way a Nigerian mother will fight this tattoo. 

    “Today Germany, tomorrow na London” — Loaded by Tiwa Savage and Asake

    You’re basically prophesying into your life, and your mother has to be the weapon fashioned against you if she decides to hate on this tattoo. 

    “I see darkness all around, but I know I’m the light” — Electricity by Pheelz and Davido 

    This is the equivalent of getting the lyrics to Sinach’s I Know Who I Am tattooed on your left thigh or back. Your mother would be proud of you for recognising your purpose in life and writing it in ink. 

    “Pay me my salary. I want to marry” — Anita by The Cavemen. 

    A focused child who wants to make money and give their mother a wedding (and potentially, grandchildren)? Nigerian mothers are sending BCS right now to boast about you to their frenemies. 

    “E kira fun mummy mi o” — Ojuelegba by Wizkid

    You’re literally hailing her and asking everyone to celebrate her too. How can any mother be mad at that? Make it make sense. 

    “Before dem use me, I go use my sense” — Peace Be Unto You by Asake

    I doubt the woman who told you to “put it on her head” when you asked stupid questions about where to put stuff growing up will be mad at you for telling the world you’re ten steps ahead of them. Nigerian mothers like to talk about “common sense” a lot, so it’s just common sense to know they’d love this tattoo. 

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    “I’ve never stopped in my life, so tell me, why would I stop now?” — Never Stopped by BNXN

    A resilient icon. Even your mother will stan. 

    “Wake up in the morning, Hallelujah. Chasing the money, chasing the bag” — Won Da Mo by The Mavins

    A tattoo that says you’re a prayerful child of God and a hard worker who refuses to settle is the best way to get your mother to not only approve your tattoo, but pay for it too. Shoutout to Rema for the cheat code. 

    “Dem never see me coming” — Bandana by Fireboy DML and Asake 

    Inshallah, your enemies will never see you coming. 

    “I stand strong (insert your name) no go minus” — Stand Strong by Davido and Sunday Service Choir 

    A choir is involved. That’s all you need to defend a tattoo of this line from Davido’s hit. Your mother will switch to your side the moment she gets this info. 

    “Moving with currency, I’m on a foreign p” — WO WO by Miz, BNXN and Blaqbonez

    The only time this tattoo will backfire is if you’re poor, and its message doesn’t match your lifestyle. Who doesn’t love dollars and pounds here and there. 

    ALSO READ: All the Times Nigerian Song Lyrics Had Us Saying “God Forbid!”

  • Streaming Farms: How Our Fave Artists and Labels Might Be Scamming Us

    Watching Ruger and BNXN fight on Twitter is nothing new. As a matter of fact, it happens almost every time one of them has a new song coming, forcing the internet to believe they’re probably in the same group chat. Like clockwork, BNXN dropped Traboski just hours after their back and forth. But outside of their recent fight being chaotic as hell, it also revealed something Nigerians can’t stop talking about — streaming farms. 

    Ruger’s tweet accusing artists of paying influencers for TikTok popularity
    BNXN’s tweets accusing Ruger and his label of using streaming farms to top the charts

    Streaming Farm 101 

    Nigerians are already used to the word farming — Buhari asked us to “go to the farm and earn respect” in 2018, and Tinubu threatened to send 50 million youths to the farm during his campaign — but most people aren’t used to streaming farms. 

    While the concept sounds like a new area of tech that could finally make our tech bro aspirations a reality, streaming farms are companies designed to add fake streams to a song using bots or multiple phones at a time. Yes, I know, it sounds crazy, but when you remember how easy it is to buy likes or followers on social media, it makes total sense that buying streams is a possibility. 

    These streaming farms take advantage of apps like Spotify, Apple Music, Audiomack and Deezer, also known as Digital Service Providers (DSPs), making a shitload of money for themselves and their clients. However, before it starts to look like a “Nigerians are always doing 419” scenario, it’s important to note that streaming farms are not unique to Nigeria. They’re actually global and used by both established and upcoming artists. 

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    How streaming farms works

    These streaming farms are known to create bots — software applications passing off as human internet users. Because of their ability to mirror human subscribers, these bots are programmed to carry out human activities, like streaming music, but on a large scale. 

    So while Americans (no data for Nigeria, unfortunately) can listen to music for an average of a little over two hours a day, bots can do 24 hours straight because they don’t have to sleep or look for ewa agoyin in the morning. These bots can stream music as many as 1000 times in just one minute.

    Alternatively, some streaming farms just use a lot of phones to play a song over and over again. Wild AF! But it’s true. 

    Why do artists and labels use streaming farms? 

    How many times this year have you seen your faves post a screenshot of their song topping the charts on either Spotify or Apple Music? Whether we like it or not, streaming is here to stay, and it’s an important part of an artist’s career. 

    The amount of streams you get as an artist doesn’t just give you bragging rights. It also helps you make money since DSPs are known to pay artists based on streams. But bragging rights and money aside, streaming numbers do something else; they pique people’s curiosity. 

    Several times, I’ve seen a song top the charts or amass a truckload of streams even though I’ve never heard it anywhere, and none of my friends have either. The fact that this song is such a “hit”, and I’m completely oblivious to its existence, makes me feel left out. How are millions of people on this wave, and I’m dulling? And before you know it, I’m streaming the song. 

    The truth is, I’m not the only one who streams songs out of curiosity and FOMO, a lot of people do it too. This introduces them to a new artist or song, even though the initial hype surrounding the artist is fake. Streaming farms maintain the hype or position of top artists as hitmakers while it helps smaller artists break out. 

    In a normal world, the number of streams on musical platforms would be an accurate and true determination of a song’s or artist’s popularity, but we don’t live in a normal world, do we? 

    Are streaming farms legal? 

    Before you consider starting your own streaming farm or employing one, know it’s all at your own risk, dear. While Nigeria doesn’t have an explicit law proving streaming farms are fraudulent entities, using them still counts as  a direct violation of the terms and services of streaming platforms. 

    What streaming farms do to the music industry

    Ruger and BNXN’s Twitter fight might’ve exposed streaming farms on a large scale, but the truth is, most people have known about it for a long time. 

    For independent and upcoming artists, streaming farms make an already hard industry ten times more difficult to break into. Forget competing with other talents, you now have to compete with their social media following and the multiple bots they have streaming their songs. 

    Streaming farms also mess up how we consume or receive music. Not only does it trick listeners into listening to a song, but it also makes it hard to know if the artists or songs are actually hot. Do the streets and clubs really love you? Or have we been manipulated into thinking we do? 

    ALSO READ: Why Asa’s “IDG” with Wizkid Is Missing — and Why She’s Suing Joeboy

  • Marketing 101: How to Blow As a Young Nigerian Music Artist

    Are we the only ones noticing that BNXN and Ruger only fight when one of them wants to drop music? 

    With new music dropping left and centre these days, Nigerian artists are doing the most to grab our attention these days. 

    If you think fighting is extra, wait until you read some other ways Nigerian artists trick us into listening to their music. 

    Claim to be the best in the game so fans can argue 

    Wizkid has done it, Davido does it once in a while and Burna Boy does it every three to five business days. Claiming to be the best, knowing fully well that your career is built on autotune, is a sure way of attracting all the stan groups to come and defend their faves. By trying to insult and drag you, they’ll end up giving you the visibility you need. 

    Look for other artists to fight with because violence is sweet 

    If there are two things Nigerians like, it’s amebo. To capture our attention, you must combine both of them stylishly, and the only way to do that is to cause drama by fake fighting on the TL. From Victony and Omah Lay’s pretend fight to Buju and Ruger’s monthly fights, everyone is doing it. Get on board!

    Pray and fast that a messy tweet from your past shows up so you can be temporarily cancelled

    Cancelling has become one of the quickest ways to blow. The moment the internet decides to drag you like Tiger gen based on something you said or did, everyone starts trying to catch up with the gist. Before you know it, you’ve become a hashtag, and people start streaming your music either out of curiosity or spite. It doesn’t make sense, but I guess it is what it is. 

    Ask Korty if she has free time to gist with you 

    Korty recently said she’s the goat of YouTube, and if that whole African Giant thing worked for Burna Boy and got him a Grammy, then yes, sis, talk your shit! As the goat of YouTube and Gen Z content creation, Korty should also be on your “How to Blow” list. Make a video with her, pretend to be into some weird shit like cooking based on astrology, and watch the internet eat you up like plantain. 

    Visit the nearest MFM for anointing and night vigil

    It doesn’t matter if your song is about how all power belongs to someone’s bum bum, you still need the support of the Holy Spirit for your song to blow. Remember, what God cannot do doesn’t exist. Find the nearest Bible-believing church and start kabashing ASAP!

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    Backflip and summersault until you come up with a viral dance move 

    Having a good song is important, but having viral TikTok dance is important-er. Argue with the Gen Zs who are running the world right now. 

    Post a chat screenshot of how you got a feature 

    Do you think getting people like Wizkid or Olamide on your song is easy? You have to tension everyone with screenshots of these icons telling you that you’re the next big thing. You need us to know you’re not on our level. 

    Post screenshots of your Apple Music and Spotify rankings

    How else will people listen to your music if you don’t show them that other people are also listening to it? Quick maths, bro. 

    Post image or video of yourself in the studio 

    As an artist, you must remind everyone that the grind didn’t start today. Before dropping your album, a dimly lit studio picture or video filled with smoke everywhere is compulsory for the TL. The best caption that goes with this post? “Something is cooking *insert flame emoji*”

    ALSO READ: Halfway Into 2022 and These Are the Best Nigerian Albums We’ve Heard

  • #BumpThis: P-Square Is Back, BNXN vs. Ruger, M.I Abaga and More

    It’s another Friday, and after soaking in Omah Lay’s Boy Alone all week, we’re ready to get into some new music. From Jos legends, P-Square and M.I Abaga, making comebacks to a new song from BNXN and a remix with Ruger, these songs should be on your radar as you step into the weekend. 

    Jaiye (Ihe Geme) — P-Square 

    Mary Slessor must be feeling funky right now because our favourite twins are back and thriving! Five years after breaking hearts worldwide with their separation, Rudeboy and Mr P are back as P-Square and armed with an explosive new single, Jaiye (Ihe Geme)

    Jaiye (Ihe Geme) gives us classic P-Square with traces of amapiano and the anthem-like chorus new school artists like Asake have made famous. A hyper party song that shows us our faves still have their magic touch, Jaiye (Ihe Geme) is a masterclass on how to evolve your sound as an artist and make a comeback people will not forget. 

    The Guy — M.I Abaga

    When M.I Abaga wants to go hard, the short black boy from J-Town goes HAM! Hitting us with the title track to his long-awaited album, The Guy, M.I goes for necks and careers, reminding everyone he’s a “five-star general” in this rap thing. 

    Name dropping everyone from Vector to Tiwa Savage, and firing shady shots at Glo users, M.I’s flow on this track is crisp and confident. While social media back-and-forths may have created a dent in M.I’s iconic status, The Guy sounds like the redemption we’ve all been waiting for.

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    Kenkele — BNXN and Wande Coal 

    Since Feeling took over the summer of 2021, BNXN has done his best to ensure we don’t miss him for more than four weeks. From EPs and name changes to social media beef, he’s worked harder than the National Grid’s urge to collapse every two days.

    Teaming up with Wande Coal for the mid-tempo earworm, Kenkele, BNXN may have struck gold again. Kenkele has vocals as smooth as butter and all the makings of a TikTok hit. We’re still waiting for a full album from him, but we’ll hold on to Kenkele for now. 

    Miniskirt Remix — Raebel and Ruger 

    Raebel’s Miniskirt is one of those songs that stops you in your tracks the first time you hear it. Singing about the familiar feeling of trying to convince someone you’re the right person for them, Miniskirt was already a niche hit. 

    Dropping gaslighting 101 lyrics like, “They say I’m not good for you, and they’re right”, Ruger is the toxic but perfect fit for a remix of Miniskirt. He might’ve elevated this song to another level, and we’re totally here for it. 

    Shaye — Magixx 

    After killing it with his debut single, Love Don’t Cost a Dime — and its remix with Ayra Starr — Mavin-signee, Magixx is back with Shaye to help us get the party started. 

    A perfect song to close out the week, Magixx sings about drinking Hennessy and lighting a blunt despite all the problems in our lives. After all, this life is one. Why spend all your time worrying about issues you’ll still meet on Monday, when you can Shaye today.

    ALSO READ: We Need These Nigerian Musicians to Create More Joint Projects