2020 is the year of rings. Therefore, we decided to create a guide for men seeking to become members of the sacred ring issuing institution.

Here are a few tips that may be useful for men in choosing their partners:

7) Test her with money

Give her ₦200 to make soup. If she fails, she can’t manage money. If she passes, she’s probably stingy. All of these are red flags.

6) When you go out, test her with food

Offer to buy her food and ensure she refuses. If she tries to eat from your plate, she’s a thief and that’s how she’ll be eating your money.

5) Test her with bone straight

Buy her the hair and watch her reaction. If she gets excited, she’s too lavish. If she’s meh about it, she doesn’t have taste and she’s not in your league.

4) Test her with Fintech

If she doesn’t know words like “Cowrywise,” “Safe lock.,” “Piggvest,” “Risevest,” “Withdrawal date,” “buy dollars,” then she’s not financially popping and can’t manage money. If she knows the words, she’s probably cheating on you with a tech bae. Sorry, bro.

3) Test her with gifts

If she buys you singlets and boxers you know she doesn’t mean you well. If she buys you PS5 just know you must give her your kidney – whatever you see, take it like that.

2) Test her with the Nigerian anthem

If she sings it without frowning then she likes Nigeria and that’s bad vibes. However, if she can’t sing it, she’s not in touch with her roots. If she doesn’t know herself, how can she know who you are?

1) Test her with music

Editor’s note: This is no way reflects the musical taste of the writer. Any relationship is purely fictional.

Test her with the song titled CashApp. My brother, if you sing “ice on my neck” and she replies with “ice on my wrist,” wahala aya aya oh. If she doesn’t know the reply, she definitely can’t gbese.

Keep us anon.

Did we miss any? Let us know in the comments section.

[donation]