When it comes to navigating difficult terrain, there’s nobody better than a Nigerian young adult to make a way out of it.
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From learning to dodge slaps, to perfecting the right speech speed and cadence to talk yourself out of a beating, the Nigerian youth is skilled in the art of getting away from the worst circumstances.
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Well, that is unless you have -0 fucks to give and you’re ready for all the smoke Nigerian parents and the most judgy of Nigerian aunties can throw your way. Which brings us round to a special section of Nigerian people. The ones with all the mind in the world. If you’re wondering who makes the cut, here’s a list of people whose bravery in their Nigerian homes must come specially sent from the gods, because e no too make sense:
Daring to enter your mother’s sitting room with coloured hair
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Doesn’t matter if she’s there or not. Just thinking it’s an okay thing to do is problematic.
Smoking in front of your parents
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This does not apply to sometime African giants sha.
Having very obvious tattoos
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If you never had to wear a wrist watch to sleep or wear a t-shirt in crazy Nigerian heat to cover your tattoos, you are who we’re talking about.
Rocking leg chains in full view of your Nigerian father
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Anyone know what it is about leg chains that gets everyone so worked up?
Dreadlocks. That’s the line
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Hmm. In a Nigerian home? Big energy.
Drinking publicly
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And we’re even talking about the small stuff. How will Deacon take it if she sees you drinking can Orijin in the roof she was so kind to provide to you?
Sporting obvious piercings
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Yeah, we’re going to ask you to give us some of that excess mind you have over there.