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“Most people don’t know but in my first few months, I was in Chemistry before I moved to Agriculture. We had to do our faculty and departmental registration by hand at the time.”
“So there were about a thousand students in the Physics Lab fixing to do their registration for the Faculty of Science and move on with their lives. After waiting a day and coming back the next day as early as I could, it was finally my turn.”
“See, I’m left-handed, so I handed my file over but she wouldn’t take it. She shouted, ordering me to go to the end of the line. How dare I present something to her with my left hand? Do I have elders at home?”
“I had to wait for about 20 people to go first, then I apologised properly before she considered answering me. It was frustrating” – Adebayo. Obafemi Awolowo University.”
Ekosodin is a student neighbourhood near my school, and it’s famous for all the wrong reasons. I was walking in the area with a friend once when we heard someone shout, “Fine girl wassup na?”
We just assumed, “oh it’s just boys catcalling.” He kept at it, and we just ignored. All of a sudden, he just switched up and shouted, “Na me you dey form for?! Una want make I pursue you?” I don’t even know who ran first, I just know we took off, turning around every corner, running over dustbins and docking about.
We don’t even know if he actually pursued us, but we didn’t care.
Ask anyone about young Nigerians and you’re going to hear something in the lines of ‘largest demographic in Nigeria’. They’re mostly right; young people make up well over half of Nigeria’s population.
A vital subset of young people is the student demographic. It’s why it’s weird that the Student Voice is mostly underrepresented in public discourse–well unless there’s a strike.
So it had us thinking, what’s an effective way to tell these stories at scale?
Introducing Aluta And Chill, Again.
We’re combing every campus looking for Nigerian students who have an eye for good stories. Because who best to find student stories and tell them properly?
Combing Every Campus?
Yes, every single one. Whether it’s in Yobe or Tokyo, as long as there are Nigerians, there will be stories, and we’re looking for people in these places to tell them. We’re looking for all kinds of stories, from regular school struggles to thoughts about the future. Relationship stories? We want that. Faith? That too. Gbas gbos? Bring it.
As long as it’s a story, we can attempt to tell it properly.
What format are we looking to start with?
Ever heard of Brandon Stanton? He’s this guy who travels the world, starting conversations with people, and collecting their stories under ‘Humans Of New York’. This is what his stories look like:
“In my church you’re either Christian or possessed by demons. We have services four times per week. Luckily zoning out looks a lot like praying. I’m not saying that I don’t believe any of it. I just have a lot of questions that nobody will answer. Whenever I ask a hard…" pic.twitter.com/POrsftdRXE
When I graduated from the University of Ado-Ekiti in 2014, I had attended just under 100 lectures. I began counting in 200 level.
Don’t ask me how I did it. Over the 6 years or so I spent in Ado, my parents had grown understandably frustrated. My colleagues hated me. Lecturers couldn’t pick me out of a lineup.
One particular HOD sent me out midway through an exam because he had never seen me in his class. But in the midst of all that class-stabbing and tearing up the timetables in symbolic defiance, I had learned that skipping classes isn’t such a bad idea.
Undergrads got no love for mundane stuff like classes anymore.
Over the years, a generation of dropout entrepreneurs and the small fact that people never end up in the fields they studied in school has made flunking or dropping out more appealing.
Lately, more students have been asking just how important (or not) it is to attend lectures while in University.
You already know the answer I’m inclined to give. But five years seems like aeons ago. And while education in Nigeria hasn’t changed much, I’m aware things may be different for the 9-3-4 generation.
So I decided to ask a group of undergraduates.
And who better to ask than a batch of students who are known for constantly having something on the side; UNILAG students. Here’s what they said about skipping classes and why it’s not a horrible idea.
*Students names have been changed at the owners’ request to avoid stories that touch.
Ayomide (21) Thinks You Can Plan What Lectures To Stab Like A Pragmatic Delinquent
“I don’t think these universities actually think of how effective the lectures are, but they want you to come. So they scare you with attendance and impromptu tests. But if your grades are not dependent on those, you can actually work out an arrangement that works for you.”
“I usually study the timetable and course outlines so I attend lectures for courses and topics that are very difficult. The rest of them I just read at home. I spend the time mostly recording and hanging with my friends at the studio. I’m in Final Year and my grades are pretty good.”
Ebele (18) Thinks Lectures Are So 1990 And Students Have Moved On
“My older brother is my role model and he never went for lectures. So I came into school with the impression that I could wring my way out of classes, get good grades and focus on what you need to do.”
“I think we live in a world where information is easily accessible, people record lectures nowadays, there are materials on the internet so the lectures are not as important. You can pass without them and use the time for other things.”
Anwuli (19) Thinks Lectures Today Are One Giant, Redundant Setup.
“Lmao. This is actually funny because lectures would only be useful if they were teaching you useful stuff. In my mass communication department now, for instance, they split some of us into a group that is focusing on print media and radio”
“What kind of eternal setup is that? Why are you teaching people about radio when all the media today is online? Skipping lectures would only hurt you if there was something to gain in the first place.”
Tare (20) Thinks Balance Is Everything.
“Skipping lectures can go either way, to be honest. You can end up missing a lot of class work, piling up assignments, missing attendance points and the lecturer can even give you problems when it’s time to write exams. But the thing is you can actually be fine without it.”
“Many of my colleagues who have other interests are using their times to chase their side hustles, and when it’s close to exams, they show up, study with us in groups and they pass. So it really depends on how and why you do it.”
Sope (22) Thinks Universities Are More About Discovery Than Random Lectures
“If I’m being serious, lectures don’t do anything for you. Yes, they’ll use attendance to scare you in UNILAG, but the truth is there’s nothing they’re teaching that you can’t learn on your own.”
“Also, a lot of us come here as kids and it’s only after a while that we discover that we have no interest in what we’re studying. If you ask someone like that to attend all the lectures instead of chasing their path, they’ll probably end up frustrated for the rest of their lives.”
So, it appears attendance marks are a real reason why a lot of students attend classes, not, you know, sheer desire for knowledge and all that good stuff.
Of course, this is a relatively small sample size that does not reflect what the entire UNILAG student body thinks, but it’s a significant starting point.
The most striking thing though is that students now think of university in terms of boxes to be checked–grades to achieve, courses to pass, units to amass, rather than an experience. That’s why these guys believe skipping classes isn’t a bad idea.
Are there ways to fix this? Certainly.
But a better alternative is to move forward and build universities into something more than academic centres. I know for sure I’d have gone to more classes if everything didn’t have ‘study or die’ written all over it.
The end of another strike means the continuation of another struggle – Final Year.
Final year is the most frightening year in school. One wrong move and you’re getting slapped with an extra year. Add the emotional punishment called ‘project’ and you have a full stack horror movie.
It isn’t all nightmares though, and being a few months away from your great escape has its perks.
Clear The Way, Final Year Brethren Coming Through
You can’t be in final year and not raise shoulder. After years of suffering and emotional torment you want to be humble? My friend, raise shoulder and stunt, strut on these streets like you own them. Have your own entrance song if you can. Brothers and Sisters, you’ve come this far with pieces of your sanity intact, you deserve some respect.
One Lecturer You Don’t Like Will Adopt You
This is the one that’ll shock you to your bones. The same lecturer that said A is for God and gave you an F in year 2 will start saying you’re his son or daughter. Excuse me sir, we’re not friends like that.
You Don’t Know Them, But They Know You
In every class it’s normal to have people you may never say a word to, especially if it’s a big class. There are also people you didn’t know were in your class to begin with. It will come as a surprise that you’re all friends, they know your name, your favourite food, and your BVN too.
Final Year Week
Get your dancing shoes ready because its party time. 7 days of food, clothes, hangouts with your classmates and going wild. But not too wild because there’s still your project defence. Be guided.
After Your Defence
The crown jewel of the final year race – your project defence. It marks the end to your rite of passage into the real world. The moment you close your project supervisors door and step into the sun a free human, the rest of your life begins.
On February 8th,2019 the Academic Staff Union of Universities announced their decision to suspend their strike after reaching an agreement with the Federal government. Students across the country came to a solemn realisation – school was going to resume soon. On the plus side, the final year brethren get to graduate this year. On the other hand, the battle with our archaic educational system for a degree continues.
Hope you’ve enjoyed waking up by 11 AM and eating whenever you like because it’s back to crappy hostels, terrible power supply, hot weather, boring lectures, mandatory pseudo-fasting, and “this-school-is-a-scam” rants.
Nationwide, academic activities are set to resume and we thought it would be nice to remind you of a few things.
Get Ready To Lose All The Weight
You’ve been at home for more than 3 months so it’s only natural that you’ve put on some extra weight. If you haven’t, contact your village people immediately and beg.
Things are about to change though, you’re all going back to your respective war camps and torture facilities. That means that some bald middle aged man with his notes from the 80s is about to bore and stress you till you can play do re mi with your rib cage.
Do You Still Remember Your Matric Number?
If, like me, you gave up on school and forgot your matric number during the strike, please line up according to your height. We’re buying zobo to wash away our sorrows make we dey alright.
PS – Ask your class rep, he’s been signing your attendance for you so he knows.
Time To Become A Bread And Beans Warrior Again
If you’ve grown accustomed to Basmati rice and Chicken fillet with a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice to wash it down, I’m already crying for you. Brethren, forget the comfort you have known and return to your bread and agoyin ways as quickly as possible.
Hope You’ve Been Happy For The Entire Year
Fun fact about most universities – as you walk (or drive if you’re now a big somebody) through the gates, you’re leaving your joy and happiness outside, you’ll pick it up when you exit the premises.
Sometime in December 2018, we were thinking about the elections and how things might turn out. We – the team, including two undergraduates – were discussing a question: what do Nigerians students across the country think about the elections?
We knew that if we were going to useful feedback, we’d have to speak to actual students.
There’s a lot of talk about what the student demographic thinks, what motivates them, and what they care about. What we hardly ever see, is one where they actually get to talk about what they care about.
To avoid the trap, we worked with the students on the team and came up with a bunch of questions that might give us a big picture. Then we sent out a survey to student communities everywhere.
While it is important to note that this might not be a clear representation of every Nigerian student (or even the mass of Nigerian students), this attempts to give a broad sense of how people might be feel about the entire process.
First, we tried to make this as diverse as possible.
While it wasn’t as evenly distributed as we’d have loved, we found students in every geopolitical zone.
The first question we asked, as you’d expect in election season is the PVC question –the haves and have-nots. 52% of the students we spoke to said they’ve gotten theirs.
This could mean political apathy among students could be lower than the general average. A number of factors could be at play here; like education, the work of student communities to constantly sensitise their peers, and access to information. But it gets more interesting; the older students generally showed more enthusiasm about getting their PVCs.
Sometimes, age isn’t just a number. For most of these young students, this is the first election where they’ll be eligible to vote. But there’s a small difference. We have a four-year election cycle, so odds are students aged 20 and above were on the cusp of being eligible to vote in the 2015 elections.
One could say they would have become considerably interested in governance and elections since then. And after the heralded change of power.
Perhaps, they also looked forward to casting their first vote too.
But what about those who didn’t bother with the first step: registering to vote?
“Why don’t you have a PVC?”
A ton of reasons. Some were too young, others just didn’t care but more than anything else, the stress that goes into getting a PVC is the leading reason people don’t have theirs.
That’s a sentiment that’s shared by many older people as well.
And about apathy, there’s something to see there too. Most of the apathy was found in the younger students.
It’s not surprising. We live in a gerontocracy, and many of these younger students are getting the impression that politics and governance are old men’s games.
What’s worse – there is no frame of reference for them.
So they are more than eager to turn their attention and effort to other interests.
So, who has your vote?
First of all, it appears that there’s not enough love to go round for the Big Two; Buhari and Atiku. The 3rd force, on the other hand, got the most love from the students. To think there was supposed to be an actual coalition.
So, what does this all mean?
For a start, it means we need to make governance more accessible to young people, particularly students. Remember when we had students’ unions?
Once upon a time, they were training grounds for commentators, future technocrats and politicians. Reviving unionism on campuses would be a good place to start.
Beyond grooming the future, students’ unions also get students acquainted with the political process from their first day on campus.
You’ve probably heard this before, but it’s way too hard to participate as a member of the Nigerian electorate. If it was easier to register, fewer of the students we surveyed would have stayed away from getting their PVCs. Now, imagine how many students stayed away across the nation.
So there it is; Many of them won’t vote this year because they were not been catered to, in rhetoric or actuality. It’s scary because that’s a large part of the electorate. If nothing else, what our students helped us understand is that students can care about politics and voting.
They just face the same problems as the rest of the people. There’s a lot to fix, certainly. We can fairly say things would be a lot different if the student vote counted.e
It has now been 85 days since the Academic Staff Union of Universities (ASUU) began an indefinite nation-wide strike at a NEC meeting held at the Federal University of Technology, Akure. Since then, the union and the federal government have met 8 times, going back and forth in attempts to come to a conclusion that satisfies everyone.
Leaders of ASUU and federal government representatives during one of their meetings.
Which is why I was relieved when, after a closed-door meeting with the leaders of ASUU, Senator Chris Ngige announced that the FG had released N163bn to settle some of ASUU’s issues. I was like “THANK YOU, JESUS! FINALLY” and figured that it would only be a matter of time before the strike got called off.
My celebration was premature though because not long after, ASUU came through like a wrecking ball and were like:
How cool would it be if press releases were released in meme format?
Dr Ade Adejumo, the Ibadan Zonal Coordinator of ASUU, spilled all this tea in a statement released by the union, dramatically titled “Re: N163bn released to ASUU: Putting the record straight.” He said that along with being untrue, the federal government’s claim misinforms the general public that ASUU collects money from the government.
Here’s an excerpt from the statement:
But the question to ask now is:
Well, here’s what really happened.
You see, in an attempt to identify and fix specific problems in Nigeria’s education system, ASUU carried out a NEEDS assessment on it back in 2012. The result of that exercise is what is called the Needs AssessmentRevitalization Fund (i.e. the money that ASUU is currently fighting the FG for).
TETFund is an agency set up to provide supplementary support to public tertiary institutions. Speaking about the whole thing, ASUU’s national leader, Prof Biodun Ogunyemi, clarified that while the union did receive N163bn, it was from the TETFund and not from the Ministry of Education for the revitalization fund.
TRANSLATION:
The Federal Government is still an onigbese and needs to pay what it owes before the strike is called off.
All this is fucking terrible because while the FG is doing all it can to eschew responsibility, public university students around the country are stuck at home with their lives put on hold.
It’s a few days to the end of my internship, and I’ve been thinking about the coming weeks. My editor asked me a bunch of questions about my birthday, I found it weird and suspicious.
A bunch of conversations later, I ended up here.
1999
The 6 billionth human was born in 1999, and while I was also born that year, that human wasn’t me.
You know what else makes 1999 an important year? The first ASUU strike and the switch to the democratic government we’re ‘enjoying’ now.
Out with the military and in with the thunder. I wonder what those 5 months were like for students.
2001
I was a chubby baby, walking around the house causing mischief. I don’t know if my mum was tired of me draining milk from her body 49 times a day, but I ended up in Kindergarten.
While I was just starting school, University students were about to take another L for 3 months.
49 lecturers were sacked from the University of Ilorin and ASUU wasn’t having it. OBJ wasn’t ready to deal with their feelings, so he called them lazy Nigerian youth ‘lazy and ungrateful’.
2002
The baby boy was getting bigger and moving up the ladder. I like to imagine KG 2 was my boss year in Kindergarten.
I probably sat in the middle of the class, beside a pretty girl.
While I was enjoying my 3rd Christmas, ASUU was serving thunder again but not for very long.
The previous agreement had not been implemented and ASUU went on a 2-week long strike.
2003
Did anyone else have a long WWE wrestling phase? I know I did and it started when I was 4.
I’d come back home, speedily lose my uniform and beg my brother to play wrestling with me.
I always tried to do Kurt Angles ankle lock. Keyword being “tried”. ASUU too was experiencing trial and failure, the agreements still weren’t implemented.
While I was falling in love, ASUU embarked on the longest strike till date, a full 6 months.
2005
Four words – Lord of The Rings. The best movie of this century, argue with your pastor or priest. 6 years old and going outside every day.
After watching “Fellowship of The Ring”, I became Legolas with the bow.
The downside is that I may have fired it at my sister and got a major ass whooping that evening. University students were about to feel some heat too, as ASUU was getting ready to interrupt academic once again. 2 weeks later things were back to normal and I was scheming how to make another bow.
2006
The first time I ever heard the word ASUU was in 2006. My big brother was in his first year and I had outgrown wrestling.
To be honest I didn’t have a partner anymore so I lost interest. He came home one day, ASUU had issued a warning strike and it was safer being at home.
He was back to school a week later though.
2007
Being the only child at home when I was 8 was beyond boring. My sister was in year 1 now, she had left me too.
I had my mom and dad every day, but making the lives of your elder siblings a bit more stressful has a unique taste.
I was busy playing outside, as usual, some parts of me missing them, some parts wondering if I should make a new bow and risk my mom knocking my teeth out, and they strolled into the compound.
Surprise surprise, Asuu had done it again. But I didn’t care really, it was the best 3 months of 2007.
2008
Junior secondary was when the real survival course took place. Avoiding seniors, trying to get food during break time and having my first real encounter with the sorcery called Math.
Normally I’d cry to my brother or sister and get them to show me a few tricks, but they weren’t around.
The one time I needed Asuu and they betrayed me.
You can imagine my delight when I overheard a conversation between my mom and my brother, mentions of a strike and ASUU. Unfortunately, they didn’t have the chance to come home.
I failed Math that term. ASUU went on strike for a week over demands for an improved payment scheme and the 49 “lazy” lecturers from the University of Ilorin.
2009
I hit 10 in 2009. I was still a short yellow chubby-faced boy, taking more note of the world but still having adventures outside.
The term had ended earlier than usual and the fun was about to begin. I was getting ready to “shoot” some arrows when 2 familiar figures strolled through the gate.
It had happened again, but this time it wasn’t going to be as much fun. My siblings wanted to graduate, not stay at home and count trees.
Those were 4 long months but in October, my siblings were back to chasing the GPA.
2010
It was bye-bye and see you later a few days to my siblings a few days after my 11th birthday. Once again I was Lord of the house and I would run around naked, stamping my authority with my royal buttcheeks. It was way more fun than it sounds.
I was done with another term and happy the holidays were here but I didn’t expect to see my brother and sister for another few weeks. I stepped into the house and there they were. I knew the routine by now. On the bright side, my Math scores went higher in the following term.
It’s safe to say I stunted on everyone in my class but it didn’t matter much, an extra year had been added to my sibling’s graduation date as the strike lasted for over 5 months.
2011
Moving to a new state is a life-changing experience. I didn’t know what to expect. But 5 months in Lagos gave me a growth spurt and puberty. It wasn’t bad so far.
My siblings were schooling in another state so it was weird to see them come home early December. No one needed to tell me ASUU was pon the strike again.
It didn’t last very long and some days after my 13th birthday, they were off to school again. It was the year my brother graduated.
2013
When you’re in SS2/SS3 your biggest concerns are WAEC and end of term parties. Thanks to having siblings I was also thinking about ASUU and the coming battles. Luckily my brother had already graduated and my sister was months away from leaving school too.
She dodged the bullet by a few weeks and finished her exams just as ASUU went on strike for 5 months.
On the flip side, it made her NYSC service a full calendar year, with all the many public holidays for the good of her sanity.
2017
At 18 both my siblings were long done with school, it was just me now. After the riot that happened in my school during my first year, I was praying nothing would try to mess with my graduation date.
I should have used that time and energy to grow my Instagram honestly.
A few weeks into the second semester of year 2- like a thief in the night – ASUU came and did their magic. I started calculating how these people were about to mess with my graduation date but my God is bigger.
They called off the strike in September and it was back to hustling for the GPA.
2019
Now I’m in my final year, months away from escaping this psychological torture for a certificate I’m not sure will mean much and they have come again. When we’re talking about village people being online, it’s ASUU.
At this point, I don’t know how to feel about the strike anymore, but I’d still like to graduate this 2019. On one hand, I almost enjoy not being in school, being able to write, have a job and focus on my side hustle.
On the other hand, the sooner I leave this nightmare, the better. It looks like the strike will be called off soon, or it could last another 5 months as it did in January 1999.
Things are never as they seem in Nigeria.
One thing’s for sure now, I just want to be happier with a healthy bank account.
On November 5, 2018, while some unlucky student was fighting for the last seat in the Keke so he could get to school early, the Academic Staff Union of Universities began an indefinite strike.
The reason? Well, according to ASUU, the Federal Government has been doing them wayo for a minute.
The men in Abuja have refused to approve better salaries or pay agreed allowances for lecturers in public universities.
Lowkey, this strike is just a rebirth of one that supposedly ended in September 2017.
When he was calling the lecturers to arms, The National President of the Union, Prof. Biodun Ogunyemi said something along the lines that the lecturers will not resume until “government fully implements all outstanding issues as contained in the MOA of 2017, and concludes the renegotiation of the 2009 agreements.”
So, what is this MOA?
It’s simply a memorandum–an agreement with terms that the FG agreed to fulfil in the coming future.
Apparently, a day in real life is equivalent to 10 years in Aso Rock.
Think of the Memorandum as a final attempt to ensure some decorum, like when the Barbers Association agrees on prices for haircuts and makes all the barbers paste it on their mirrors. Why would that be necessary, you ask?
Well, the FG and ASUU have been at it for quite a while. In the last 19 years, ASUU has had to pull out the lecturers for a cumulative 40 months.
40 months equals three years and four months. That’s six months less than a presidential term. That’s six months less than it should take to get a Bachelor’s Degree.
What it means is that, if you spent four years in a Nigerian University, odds are you were out of school for an average of eight months.
That’s one month less than it takes to make a baby, which then explains a lot of things.
It’s created a very big problem for ASUU. Everyone knows that thunder hardly strikes in the same place but ASUU has been doing it for decades.
So when the issue of gaps in our academic calendars comes up, the blame mostly goes in one direction – The Academic Staff Union of Nigerian Universities aka ‘ASUU’ aka “Super Strikers” aka “Sango’s Children” aka… the names go on.
The truth though is that most of these strikes happen over money.
That’s right – we all have the same problems, even when you’re an association with hundreds of members in the 60s and 70s.
For years, ASUU has maintained education deserves a larger chunk of the budget than it gets. And they’re right.
Over 60% of Nigeria’s population is aged below 25 i.e people who should be getting an education.
Yet, only a measly 7% of the 2018 budget was allocated for education at all levels.
For context, the United Nations recommends that all countries allocate 26% of their national budgets to education.
But Naija no dey ever hear word.
Remember something about the ‘renegotiation of the 2009 agreements’?
Well, every time ASUU goes on strike, the FG pulls out its mediators, holds several meetings at midnight with the lecturers, agrees to a new set of terms.
The strike gets called off.
And everyone moves on.
Till they remember nothing has changed.
Rinse, Repeat.
It’s a vicious cycle. While the rest of the country resumes work or school today, undergraduates around the country will have their lives on hold for the 63rd day running.
Despite seven meetings, ASUU and the FG have failed to reach an agreement on a way forward.
After a meeting at the end of December 2018, ASUU’s Oga at the Top dropped the names of 11 universities where lecturers are underpaid’.
He also said “the government kept saying they were working on it. If they pay that money, we will have something to take back to our members.”
So, yes, money is the problem. But odds are if you asked the FG, you’d get one response…
It’s now two months and counting since students around the country were made to start their Christmas holidays early, or take quick vacations to bae’s house.
You’ve heard all the regular bits of advice by now; learn a trade, read some books, travel (if you have dollars), pick up a hobby, and put your time to good use.
Either way, negotiations are ongoing. ASUU and the FG have scheduled another meeting for Monday, January 7.
Let’s hope the money flows and the halls can be filled again.
